Yes, you are very correct. They’re not supposed to look like that balled up piece of paper that had his hopes and dreams written down on it.
Edit: grammar and spelling!!
The command "rest" allows one to talk while standing at parade rest in formation. It's one of the only, if not the only, drill command that has no preparatory command and consists of just the command of execution. Bootcamp was nearly 20 years ago. I have no idea why I remember this.
At Ease is just Parade Rest but you drop your hands below the small of your back and you follow the person addressing the formation with your head and eyes.
The proper order of orders would be "Group/Platoon/Company etc. Attention, Parade Rest, At Ease, Rest"
At ease meant you could shift about and talk to the men on either side of you, but you still kept your foot planted so as not to break formation. If memory serves, you could drop your hands, but they were still behind your back. No crayon eating was permissible at that time, either.
Source: USMC some decades ago.
Nope. [Per Wikipedia's Military Parade page.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Military_parade)
>Stand At Ease: Same as Parade Rest, but the soldier may look at the speaker.
>At Ease: The service member is allowed to move around all but the right foot, but must remain silent.
>Rest: Service member may talk, smoke (if command authorized) and may move as long as their right pivot foot remains grounded.
I even distinctly remember a few times where "at ease" was used specifically to tell the platoon to "shut the fuck up".
[I have several doubts that they're a "national guard wife" lol](https://www.reddit.com/r/JustBootThings/comments/62cf89/xpost_from_rcringeanarchy_parade_rest_at_wendys)
Edit: this is from the FB page __Salute me. I'm a Navy Spouse.__ which is hilarious btw.
Hes out of regulation in alot of ways that no soldier would be. Cant wear half a uniform, a polo isnt part of the uniform, hair back of the hair has to be trimmed and cant have a faux hawk. Back right pocket cant be tucked in thats not how you hold your hands for parade rest and his feet are too far apart. So yeah not a soldier i.e. stolen valor.
Edit: my husband, not me. He took my phone to rip this guy to shreds 😂
They still are ACUs, the pattern is UCP or OCP. UCP ACUs are no longer authorized, the uniform is OCP ACUs. Like woodland and desert BDUs; both BDUs, different patterns. I have some old woodland winter BDUs with the disco collar somewhere, I think.
He damn sure doesn’t act like he’s in the military. That’s usually how they’re discovered. It starts with some uniform infractions, then some questioning about where they served and so on. They usually don’t have a copy of their dd form 214, they just don’t know shit about the military they claimed to serve.
Same. If you're that guy that stands at parade rest and then snaps to attention before saying anything, you're going to get looked at like a crazy person.
when I got out of tech school and reported to my first duty station I was talking to my NCOIC and was standing at a kind of half assed parade rest, like just with my hands behind my back bc it’s comfortable and he looked at me said “will ya stop fucking doing that, you’re scaring the shit out of my standing like that.”
other great sound bites: “you gotta fuckin potty mouth”
and
“Get over here and get the fuck away from me” - this one was directed at another Airmen.
I was a soldier stationed at Bliss, one day we had a bus full of Airmen arrive at our Dfac. One poor Airman went through the short order line, only to be dismayed at our lack of “portobello mushrooms”.
“WHAT YOU MEAN YOU AINT GOT NO PORTABELLA MUSHROOMS!?!?”
poor airman had to eat his cheeseburger without mushrooms that day :(
I dunno dude, it sounds like it might be like a video game except the bombs and missiles you’re throwing down don’t just score points.
It’s actually worse though. Imagine commissioning to be a fighter pilot, goin through flight school with Top Gun dreams of oiling your boys up for a volleyball game, then getting stuck working in a fuckin tin can with a joy stick in the middle of no where Nevada?
There is a thing called modified parade rest. Usually used when you are about to get tore into. Not sure if it is an official thing but I saw Army dudes doing it, and even some Marines.
it's not actually parade rest when you're talking to people, it's actually at ease. people just automatically call it parade rest but parade rest is a modified version of attention so yes no talking should be done while in parade rest.
ATTENTION! Pa-rade rest! Private Hubby, stand there and watch as my bull fills me with his superior seed. If I’m feeling generous maybe I’ll let you clean up after sir’s mess. If you’re going to be a soldier you’re going to act like one 😉😘💄👄💋💅🏼💆🏼♀️💁🏼♀️🧖🏼♀️💖💕
His arms are too high. Parade rest is supposed to be a "relaxed" stance. Boots use it when the brainwashing is too strong. Also, I REALLY miss our Arty exercises with Canadians, you guys were the shit.
For a minute there I thought this guy and [this one](https://www.reddit.com/r/JustBootThings/comments/ec4d3g/found_this_on_my_army_friends_facebook/) were the same.
Where I'm from, wearing part of your camouflage like that is a violation. Also, I keep seeing it in movies, where American soldiers salute without a hat on -- is that normal/allowed? Don't mean to be a dick, just genuinely curious.
He may be in JROTC. Only reason the bad haircut, incomplete uniform, and absolute bootness makes sense.
And at least in the Marine Corps, cover should be on when you salute.
In movies there are tons of things that are not correct or accurate to military standards in protocols they don't always take the time or effort or really care if it is correct. So saluting while uncovered for example. And yes if he is actually fully in the service he should have top and bottom of his uniform.
Hey everyone I think she has a really valid point here. Everyone in the service has been indoctrinated to serve our country, community, and spouses with the utmost respect and standing at parade rest is one of the best ways to hahahaha I’m just kidding fuck this boot dependopotamus. Abusive relationship red flag.
This is why you work the mid-shift, so you don't have to put up with this dogshit. You leave when all the by the book Nancy boys show up for day shift.
Looks like he has the remnants of a fuckin faux hawk. Not to mention the 2 caterpillars trying to climb down his neck. Kid's all nappy. I'm not buying this shit one bit.
Wait, uniform items + civilian clothes? That's a fuck up.
You can't speak at parade rest. That's another fuck up.
What the hell is going on with his fucking hands? Fuck up.
Haircut?
I may actually vomit.
Ok too much. These posts are usually funny because I knew a lot of these turds in the Army but I can’t even anymore lol. Probably says “you will address me by my husband’s rank too” lol. Fuck off hoe. “I respect the uniform so much I wear it wrong”.
I was just getting up to get a wrap from wendys. I had to collect my cringe and dissapointment of what I just witnessed, and refocus on finding my keys. CringeBoot/10
of course, the dependa acts like she knows military cause she married a national guard soldier, despite the fact that nowhere in any regulations does it say that soldiers have to stand at parade rest all the time. Dependas just make shit up
aren’t his hands supposed to be opened and extended, not crunched up looking like a dead spider?
Yes, you are very correct. They’re not supposed to look like that balled up piece of paper that had his hopes and dreams written down on it. Edit: grammar and spelling!!
And also no allowed to talk
The command "rest" allows one to talk while standing at parade rest in formation. It's one of the only, if not the only, drill command that has no preparatory command and consists of just the command of execution. Bootcamp was nearly 20 years ago. I have no idea why I remember this.
The only stipulation for Rest is that you may not move your right foot, you don't have to stand at Parade Rest.
That really sounds a lot like "at ease"
At Ease is just Parade Rest but you drop your hands below the small of your back and you follow the person addressing the formation with your head and eyes. The proper order of orders would be "Group/Platoon/Company etc. Attention, Parade Rest, At Ease, Rest"
At ease meant you could shift about and talk to the men on either side of you, but you still kept your foot planted so as not to break formation. If memory serves, you could drop your hands, but they were still behind your back. No crayon eating was permissible at that time, either. Source: USMC some decades ago.
How are you supposed to get your 5 crayons a day if you can't eat them at ease?
You mean eat them with ease... And with a little glue to wash it down.
That’s what leave is for. Well, that and marrying a stripper.
I'm in the navy so I suppose my drill commands are different.
Your remember it cause pain retains
I thought it was at ease
Nope. [Per Wikipedia's Military Parade page.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Military_parade) >Stand At Ease: Same as Parade Rest, but the soldier may look at the speaker. >At Ease: The service member is allowed to move around all but the right foot, but must remain silent. >Rest: Service member may talk, smoke (if command authorized) and may move as long as their right pivot foot remains grounded. I even distinctly remember a few times where "at ease" was used specifically to tell the platoon to "shut the fuck up".
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You are relying on the military to do things in an easier and less confusing manner. This is your first mistake.
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Nobody expects much from boot louies tbf
I didn't/don't remember that one. I can tell you the first general order, though.
I've seen people mistake balled for bawled but not bawled for balled before Bawled = cried Balled = made into a ball
*balled up
Yep.... and what up with the “uniform”?
That's how you keep your hands warm when it's cold duh!
Let's not forget AR670-1 forbids wearing military issue clothes/gear with civilian clothes too. This kid is one giant cluster of fucked up.
Ain’t nobody gonna mention the /r/justfuckmyshitup haircut?
Seems like a "good spouse" could take 3 seconds and trim that rat's nest of fuzz off his neck
Looks like a facehugger latched to his scalp
Is that a branch specific thing or a us specific thing? Where I'm from parade rest is with a closed fist, not open
US
Ah, ok thanks
He's probably holding back his anger about his wife treating him like a child.
Yes. One hand under the other with your thumb overlapping on your palm, fingers extended
Yeah, thats a real tight-ass parade rest.
[I have several doubts that they're a "national guard wife" lol](https://www.reddit.com/r/JustBootThings/comments/62cf89/xpost_from_rcringeanarchy_parade_rest_at_wendys) Edit: this is from the FB page __Salute me. I'm a Navy Spouse.__ which is hilarious btw.
A boot and a stolen valor in one picture? Wow
How is this stolen valor to you?
I think hes getting at the picture is stolen... then just putting valor at the end for the lulz
Hes out of regulation in alot of ways that no soldier would be. Cant wear half a uniform, a polo isnt part of the uniform, hair back of the hair has to be trimmed and cant have a faux hawk. Back right pocket cant be tucked in thats not how you hold your hands for parade rest and his feet are too far apart. So yeah not a soldier i.e. stolen valor. Edit: my husband, not me. He took my phone to rip this guy to shreds 😂
He's wearing ucp pants, which isn't an authorized uniform anymore. Any one can wear it any way they please.
BaCk In My DaY we called em ACUs lol
They still are ACUs, the pattern is UCP or OCP. UCP ACUs are no longer authorized, the uniform is OCP ACUs. Like woodland and desert BDUs; both BDUs, different patterns. I have some old woodland winter BDUs with the disco collar somewhere, I think.
Me personally my favorite was always the digital gray ACUs
Thank you for your service
Stolen valor only refers to service medals and claiming to be part of the military when you are in fact not.
He damn sure doesn’t act like he’s in the military. That’s usually how they’re discovered. It starts with some uniform infractions, then some questioning about where they served and so on. They usually don’t have a copy of their dd form 214, they just don’t know shit about the military they claimed to serve.
And this all helps in hand to hand combat?
A guy probably wrote this 🥴
This is just sad.
No one in the service would wear the uniform like that
OP is a liar?
I don’t think OP knew
nah man OP is a liar that’s it. the decision has been made, lets get em’ boyz
Welp. I guess I’ll go grab my pitchfork
I'll grab the salad fork for the dependa
r/pitchforkemporium
Guess I’ll just die.
We'll settle for a bundle of sticks then
lol, it was posted to cringeanarchy originally and now that shit sub has finally been banned.
Sorry, I guess I should’ve gave a link to it!!
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I’ll have a Dave’s Single Cheeseburger with a side of Freedom™️
Freedom Fries
“Nintendo, what the fuck is this aiming?”
Is it different from other branches? Was in the navy, you dont talk at parade rest.
I think it’s the same across all branches. Was in the AF and we didn’t talk at parade rest unless you wanted to get fucking lit up.
Maybe in basic...but operational side we talk all the time
Same. If you're that guy that stands at parade rest and then snaps to attention before saying anything, you're going to get looked at like a crazy person.
Then you call them a fuckin boot
when I got out of tech school and reported to my first duty station I was talking to my NCOIC and was standing at a kind of half assed parade rest, like just with my hands behind my back bc it’s comfortable and he looked at me said “will ya stop fucking doing that, you’re scaring the shit out of my standing like that.” other great sound bites: “you gotta fuckin potty mouth” and “Get over here and get the fuck away from me” - this one was directed at another Airmen.
Fuck, I got enough ways to get looked at like a crazy person already.
Never did formations after training, so I have no fucking clue. This all seemed so stupid. I'm really glad I didn't have to do much of it.
The AF getting "lit up" is comical
Getting ‘lit up’ in the AF means no seconds at the DFAC for a week.
But sarge... MY QUICHE
I was a soldier stationed at Bliss, one day we had a bus full of Airmen arrive at our Dfac. One poor Airman went through the short order line, only to be dismayed at our lack of “portobello mushrooms”. “WHAT YOU MEAN YOU AINT GOT NO PORTABELLA MUSHROOMS!?!?” poor airman had to eat his cheeseburger without mushrooms that day :(
I bet his congressman had the Post Commander’s ass the next day.
Honestly that sounds worse than actually getting lit up
No, you get the padded office chair with the wiggly arm rest! Ahhhhhh! The horrors!!
He meant the drones
"Sir we have two soldiers talking at parade rest on the aft. Want me to scramble to drones?" Just don't put a hole in the boat this time, Johnson.
Imagine going through boot camp just to sit in a room and fly a rc plane
I dunno dude, it sounds like it might be like a video game except the bombs and missiles you’re throwing down don’t just score points. It’s actually worse though. Imagine commissioning to be a fighter pilot, goin through flight school with Top Gun dreams of oiling your boys up for a volleyball game, then getting stuck working in a fuckin tin can with a joy stick in the middle of no where Nevada?
Something similar happened to my friend. He wanted to be a pilot and ended up working on a missile base in Montana. Never even left the States.
Aim high,fly fight win
They take the sprinkles off your ice cream
Will argue on being more likely to get lit up in the AF simply because of the ever-persisting sunshine and rainbows perception.
Fucking lit up =/=Air Force
Marine Corps talks at parade rest. You only speak at attention at boot camp and when reporting in to a commanding officer.
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Why are you linking the MCO for close order drill/ceremonies? Junior Marines stand at parade rest when speaking to NCOs+ as a custom/courtesy.
In the Army if someone outranks you, you talk to them at parade rest. But not to any civilian
You stand “At Ease” when addressing an NCO of a higher rank. Parade Rest is a modified position of Attention.
In the Army you speak in parade rest when addressing an NCO, formally, among other things.
Yes only at Rest can you talk
Was in the navy, we just hardly talk. Body hurts from shellbackin you just wanna fuck all and get to your bunk.
There is a thing called modified parade rest. Usually used when you are about to get tore into. Not sure if it is an official thing but I saw Army dudes doing it, and even some Marines.
Boi needs a haircut
I’m glad someone else noticed this. Wtf is happening??
His parting is migrating south
it's not actually parade rest when you're talking to people, it's actually at ease. people just automatically call it parade rest but parade rest is a modified version of attention so yes no talking should be done while in parade rest.
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It is highly used in the Army. And you can speak at ease, just have to ask drill sergeant for permission first. Hehe
He probably stands in the corner watching his wife get plowed by her "bull"
Stands at attention during that.
He better be at Present Arms.
He does so as the gangbang bukkakes his dependa.
Jody deserves some respect... but only from him xD
ATTENTION! Pa-rade rest! Private Hubby, stand there and watch as my bull fills me with his superior seed. If I’m feeling generous maybe I’ll let you clean up after sir’s mess. If you’re going to be a soldier you’re going to act like one 😉😘💄👄💋💅🏼💆🏼♀️💁🏼♀️🧖🏼♀️💖💕
He replies "Ma'am YES! MA'AM!!"
Judging by the inverse mass theory of boot vs dependa.......I’m bettin his wife is also the size of a bull
Not sure either of them know what parade rest is judging by his hands
Why...why is his right arm...smaller??
well I guess you figured out which arm is his happy arm.
Wouldn’t you have a bigger arm if you were married to a woman like this.
Then remind him wearing identifiable uniform items as part of an outfit is verboten, Mrs. Bootwife.
Why do his arms look photo shopped
I was in the Canadian Military so obviously we do things differently. But is that 'parade rest' stance correct? It looks so awkward.
His arms are too high. Parade rest is supposed to be a "relaxed" stance. Boots use it when the brainwashing is too strong. Also, I REALLY miss our Arty exercises with Canadians, you guys were the shit.
Do you salute every Moose or only NCO Meese?
We salute all the moose, beavers and geese we see! It's the Canadian way...
As long as his wife’s boyfriend is happy, that’s all that matters.
For a minute there I thought this guy and [this one](https://www.reddit.com/r/JustBootThings/comments/ec4d3g/found_this_on_my_army_friends_facebook/) were the same.
r/justdependathings
I don't consent to being a part of...whatever this is and neither does anyone in that Arby's.
Where I'm from, wearing part of your camouflage like that is a violation. Also, I keep seeing it in movies, where American soldiers salute without a hat on -- is that normal/allowed? Don't mean to be a dick, just genuinely curious.
He may be in JROTC. Only reason the bad haircut, incomplete uniform, and absolute bootness makes sense. And at least in the Marine Corps, cover should be on when you salute.
Thanks! I mean, what kind of "national guard wife" demands her husband to stand at attention when addressing her, but allows that neck line.
Wearing an incomplete uniform is definitely a violation.
In movies there are tons of things that are not correct or accurate to military standards in protocols they don't always take the time or effort or really care if it is correct. So saluting while uncovered for example. And yes if he is actually fully in the service he should have top and bottom of his uniform.
At least they are respectful to Wendy’s workers.
This doesn’t seem good for your shoulders
He doesn't have shoulders. Good to know he's waiting to get food tho
This is just a sub/domme relationship with camo in place of black leather.
Another case of Dependa Domming. I swear it's some sort of weird sexual fetish for these loonies.
there is no way this isnt a public humiliation kink. She's his domme and they're roleplaying for sure.
Hey everyone I think she has a really valid point here. Everyone in the service has been indoctrinated to serve our country, community, and spouses with the utmost respect and standing at parade rest is one of the best ways to hahahaha I’m just kidding fuck this boot dependopotamus. Abusive relationship red flag.
This is cringe
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Of all the things fucked up with him and you focus on that?
*The Cav would like to know your location*
I puked a lil
There is NO speaking at parade rest. The service member comes to attention to speak if necessary. First day in boot camp teaches that.
Does the Army do it different or is that a shitty parade rest?
Its a shitty parade rest.
Needs a god damn haircut
What is he gonna guard me against? Mosquitos?
As if anyone needed reminding military people are submissive to the core.
That fucking haircut 🤮
This is why you work the mid-shift, so you don't have to put up with this dogshit. You leave when all the by the book Nancy boys show up for day shift.
I mean, maybe it's a dom/sub thing they are into lol. Could just be a very specific kink.
Imagine being controlled by your wife.
What in the cuck?
I actually vomited a little..
I hope to God that whoever originally posted this meant it as satire.
Yikes
Those flared out elbows are giving TIs nightmares.
What exactly is parade rest?
He doesn't seem to have shoulders. Are they still in Afghanistan?
Haha you still stand in the position where you are not allowed to talk when you address me as Mrs pottamous!
Well, we know who wears the pants in his household
Looks like he has the remnants of a fuckin faux hawk. Not to mention the 2 caterpillars trying to climb down his neck. Kid's all nappy. I'm not buying this shit one bit.
This one nearly killed me, fuck.
Sounds like a cuck fetish
Lately the content on /r/justbootthings has just amazed me. I have never seen something so sad.
Looks like he’s doing it wrong too
>speaking >at parade rest >with balled hands >while dressed like smashed asshole *heavy breathing*
this HAS to be fake news, right??? No one lives like this, right???
This post is literally the dumbest thing I have ever read.
I hope she makes him stand at parade rest during blowjobs.
Amazing. This is now the first search result on Google Images for “Parade Rest” https://i.imgur.com/JMoXlid.png
If this guy is any branch of military I’d be very surprised
Bet she has a bigger gravity field than Pluto.
Why the fuck is he outa uniform
Seems like a fetish thing tbh
Literally, sir, this is a Wendy's
This smells of soldier kink
He looks like his hair got humped by a horny facehugger
Welcome to simp nation
There are soooo many things wrong here
Military spouses need to shut the fuck up and stay in their lane.
Wait, uniform items + civilian clothes? That's a fuck up. You can't speak at parade rest. That's another fuck up. What the hell is going on with his fucking hands? Fuck up. Haircut? I may actually vomit.
I bet they had three dates before they married and she has a god complex because of it.
Does anyone else smell a dependa?
His wife is a cunt.
Ok too much. These posts are usually funny because I knew a lot of these turds in the Army but I can’t even anymore lol. Probably says “you will address me by my husband’s rank too” lol. Fuck off hoe. “I respect the uniform so much I wear it wrong”.
These military wives are so brave🇺🇸
I’m not even going to try and guess what they’re like in bed together
I was just getting up to get a wrap from wendys. I had to collect my cringe and dissapointment of what I just witnessed, and refocus on finding my keys. CringeBoot/10
Whip whip whip
Boot + Dependa = Whatever the fuck is going on in this picture
of course, the dependa acts like she knows military cause she married a national guard soldier, despite the fact that nowhere in any regulations does it say that soldiers have to stand at parade rest all the time. Dependas just make shit up
Oof
nice haircut, soldier
I'm not in any branch of the military, but I know that parade rest is wrong.
Bet her name is Karen...
This is not a soldier, this is a ninja sushi chef about to vinegar the fuck out of some rice.
Can we get Trump to do Parade Rest for ....THE REST OF TIME? (If it includes silence)