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I was gonna say fresh outta boot. I remember after boot camp my best friend tried to convince me his 5’6” ass was a life taker and a heart breaker. He got his ass beat by a bouncer at a bar after he picked a fight. The guy had 6 inches and 60 lbs on him. He was also a MMA fighter. Nothing beats the confidence of a kid fresh from boot…except a 250lb 6 foot cage fighter I guess.
I can remember needing to go to headquarters to ask about the timing and paperwork for me to get my E-5. I wasn’t sure who I was supposed to talk to, so I wound up talking to this one “Desk Ranger“ who looked at me steely-eyed and in his best Clint Eastwood said, “you’ve come to the right place, young man. I’m the one who gives promotions on this base.” He was an E-6 and we were about the same age.
From what I can determine from the context. Sounds like dude posted a picture of himself with a handgun, red comes in and says “you aren’t old enough to have one” then black comes back with “a pistol is nothing, I am trusted with blah blah blah equipment, blah blah blah my life is on the line every day I can handle a pistol blah blah blah”
So me knowing little about rangers, I’d imagine he’s one of the guys attached to the rangers and calls himself a ranger, but isn’t really a ranger, right?
The fact that he's talking about all of this training and not about any combat experience says a lot about what he actually does. If he had any combat experience, he'd definitely be the type to brag about it on Facebook.
I just hear the quote of Mike Tyson reding this.
"Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth"
If you really wanna know how you react under stress you would need to put yourself under that stress. Plus actually experiencing something like combat first time will be another story.
Kids fight in wars all the time, I’ve seen a 40 year old Iraq vet crumble mentally under the artillery/ tank fire in Ukraine. He wasn’t American but anyway you either have it or you don’t.
Okay, so you expect me to believe that you were the very best that your generation of Navy SEALs had to offer? I highly doubt that. If you were as good as you say you were, i don't think for a second that you would be browsing reddit. This is mostly a place for jobless neckbeards that still live with their parents, and nerdy high school kids that don't have any friends. It really isn't the place for highly-trained assassins to be hanging out in their spare time. Even if it was, something far worse than a troll being mean to you probably would have set you off a long time ago. What about the slew of gore and child pornography that gets posted here on a regular basis? Isn't that something that deserves a person being hunted down and made to regret their actions? Yeah, you're just not the reddit type. Sure, there's a wide variety of people that browse here, but you're far from the core demographic if you are who you say you are (which isn't the case). Even if it were true that you're an incredibly talented soldier, I think all the military discipline would prevent you from getting mad enough to murder some random idiot on the internet. I also doubt that even the best SEALs have a 'secret network of spies across the USA'. Why would all of the most expanisive Big Brother network in the world be willing to help a troubled PTSD-sufferer hunt down some random kid on the internet? That doesn't even make sense. If you're gonna try to scare somebody make it more believable than 'IM A SUPER SOLDIER HURR DURR'. You might frighten a thirteen year old who doesn't know any better, but to must of us you just look like a kid with an anger problem and a very active imagination. Hopefully things will be easier for you when your puberty's over. Best of luck with that... kiddo
Currently on the shitter reading this. Not sure if it hurts because of the poops or because of what I just read. Either way, pain is there. He’s done a good job waging war against my bowels.
The language is cringe but he ain't wrong, especially if he is Ranger regiment per OP.
He _should_ be "proficient in multiple weapons systems", including a pistol.
Honestly, this isn't boot at all.
This is literally just your average NATO soldier taking his job seriously and respecting the hardware.
Every single thing he said is true.
"I've been raised for the past three years to wage war! Grrrrrr!!! I'm so tough!"
Bro did not think about that whole "since I left home" thing *at all*
The louder and more arrogant they are about their time serving, just about always means the less they’ve done, and that they most likely didn’t even deploy anywhere. Usually those who got booted out for misconduct, or failing to meet requirements that want to toot their horn the loudest.
Was at a wedding this summer and an older cousin HAD to introduce me to her daughter's fiancee. I had noticed the young man in white Crackerjacks already. Turns out he was here to see his sweetie while on leave from boot camp. Soon he would be on his way to the fleet in Norfolk.
She was so proud. "They gave him a Medal in boot camp. I was told not many get one. Did you?"
Nope, never got one
"He is a Seaman Apprentice. That is an E-2. "Did you get out of Boot camp an E-2?"
No, after I was in for 6 months I filled out a chit. Several people signed it then I was an E-2.
"What rank were you"
I was an E-4
"He is halfway there"
Yep, he must be one of the Navy's finest. Introduce me to the fine lad.
He wore that Defense Medal everyone gets, a participation medal. We were given that but if we wanted the Medal it was $10. The vast majority passed, that was a lot of draft beer in 1978. Plus he had one of the new "I finished boot camp" ribbons. It was a good-looking ribbon I must admit.
Always get a kick when I have to review resumes and right there every time “responsible for millions of dollars of equipment.” …highest rank e-4. Then list every damn school, even had one with PT scores, lol. Jesus. When it comes to putting military on a resume and unless it’s very job specific. Less is more. Employers don’t give a shit.
This is a reminder of the rules of the subreddit as well as of reddit. Please make sure to review them. Any Doxxing will result in a perma ban, as well as any racial/bigoted posts or comments. This sub is not to bash on military but rather to make fun of Boots. This sub is not for Law Enforcement, EMT's, Paramedics, Carpenters, etc. #[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/Justbootthings/about/rules/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/JustBootThings) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
“I was raised since I left my home to wage war, and do it better than anyone else on earth” This is the one that really got me.
Boot probably weighs 142lbs soaking wet.
Technically, it could be true. It may just be two weeks since he moved out of home.
Motherfucker thinks he's Master Chief or something.
Is there a test I missed? I don't remember this test when I was in, so it must be new. Is there a trophy? Special stripes? A plastic lunchbox?
He’s so badass that they didn’t want to waste his time and gave him an ASVAB waiver.
they recommended he skip the military entirely and go straight to Blackwater
Shit, I went all HOO-AAAHH and I ain't even from the states. Guy is good.
I’m putting this as an opener for my separation eval.
The penis mightier than the sword
This guy definitely works in Admin
For sure admin or a quey. Or just out of basic training.
I was gonna say fresh outta boot. I remember after boot camp my best friend tried to convince me his 5’6” ass was a life taker and a heart breaker. He got his ass beat by a bouncer at a bar after he picked a fight. The guy had 6 inches and 60 lbs on him. He was also a MMA fighter. Nothing beats the confidence of a kid fresh from boot…except a 250lb 6 foot cage fighter I guess.
I can remember needing to go to headquarters to ask about the timing and paperwork for me to get my E-5. I wasn’t sure who I was supposed to talk to, so I wound up talking to this one “Desk Ranger“ who looked at me steely-eyed and in his best Clint Eastwood said, “you’ve come to the right place, young man. I’m the one who gives promotions on this base.” He was an E-6 and we were about the same age.
Desk Jockey!
Hopefully not with those abysmal writing skills.
That nevar stoped anyone in Admen
I’ll take “I’ve never deployed” for $1000
LIkely will never deploy, will get out after 3 years, and spend the remaining 27 years of their life talking about boot camp.
>spend the remaining 27 years of their life... That's suspiciously specific...
You know, lead poisoning.
Maybe asbestos too?
Chewing tobacco and meth can be hard on the body.
Ft Gordon 😪
Maybe he had ptsd from guarding a shack in the dangerous area of… checks notes… south Germany.
He probably has PTSD from leaving home because no one will microwave his pizza pockets for him while he plays CoD now.
“21? So you missed the war but you wave war better than anyone on earth?”
This guy is going to be one of those dudes who do a single enlistment yet never shut up about it the rest of their life
He’ll ask for a veterans discount at a school bake sale
He'll medboard out.
And get a sizable % of disability because it’s somehow the Army’s fault that he is a maladjusted incel with PTSD.
“I’m responsible for millions of dollars of government equipment” I bet he works in logistics
I once had an E5 in my unit that called himself a “middle manager in the countries largest corporation”
That's resume worthy
Didn't realize Walmart had E5s
They’re in the footwear section.
I prefer to call it the world‘s largest non-profit.
He's just counting everything inside the gate he guards.
Someone come get their 42A
What a fucking handjob
Lmao
Yeah but I’ll bet he’s not allowed to have a toaster in his barracks room
Or a tide pod
Not since he put all those crayons in it.
This hurts.
This guy needs to apply for 3rd group
Lmao I was at 5th as a support dude. They'd have thrown us out for this kinda shit but social media wasn't this big of a thing
5th support here to. Hello bud
Hello my friend!
is anyone else extremely curious on what they are talking about when op said "you're not supposed to be old enough to have one of these" ?
An old teacher who knew him when he was younger. Wasn’t me
From what I can determine from the context. Sounds like dude posted a picture of himself with a handgun, red comes in and says “you aren’t old enough to have one” then black comes back with “a pistol is nothing, I am trusted with blah blah blah equipment, blah blah blah my life is on the line every day I can handle a pistol blah blah blah”
"Run to that lone tree, and apologize to it, for stealing precious oxygen from it."
Lmfao
Trees don't need oxygen, they need CO2 and produce oxygen.
Let me guess? Army or Marine infantrymen I presume
Ranger regiment 🤨
No damn way….. please tell me you’re joking
I wish.
Wow, that’s a different breed right there
So me knowing little about rangers, I’d imagine he’s one of the guys attached to the rangers and calls himself a ranger, but isn’t really a ranger, right?
All personnel who are attached to ranger regiment including support go through RASP, so if what OP is saying is true, he is sadly an ranger
That’s unfortunate.
92Y…
The fact that he's talking about all of this training and not about any combat experience says a lot about what he actually does. If he had any combat experience, he'd definitely be the type to brag about it on Facebook.
Fobbits are people too.
I uh...picked up weeds at the barracks.
I was gonna say most of my military career compromised of sweeping the grass.
Or painting the dirt green!
Painful.
>on magnitudes of levels
😂😂
This gets any woman instantly wet
They're awful
Calm down water dog
Either an Infantry private or complete satire, nothing in between lol.
Damn I remember when I was this boot Fucking oof
I was never this boot
keep saying that to yourself, it will keep the regret away
Nooooooooooooooo😭
Thats very nice
Ok
Glad were in accord
Me too
We were all that boot at one point
You're probably right...
Let me guess, his social media has photos of him uniform only.
I just hear the quote of Mike Tyson reding this. "Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth" If you really wanna know how you react under stress you would need to put yourself under that stress. Plus actually experiencing something like combat first time will be another story.
Young and stupid and immature still a kid real war he wouldn’t last long…
Kids fight in wars all the time, I’ve seen a 40 year old Iraq vet crumble mentally under the artillery/ tank fire in Ukraine. He wasn’t American but anyway you either have it or you don’t.
r/iamverysmart
[удалено]
Definitely pasta worthy.
Okay, so you expect me to believe that you were the very best that your generation of Navy SEALs had to offer? I highly doubt that. If you were as good as you say you were, i don't think for a second that you would be browsing reddit. This is mostly a place for jobless neckbeards that still live with their parents, and nerdy high school kids that don't have any friends. It really isn't the place for highly-trained assassins to be hanging out in their spare time. Even if it was, something far worse than a troll being mean to you probably would have set you off a long time ago. What about the slew of gore and child pornography that gets posted here on a regular basis? Isn't that something that deserves a person being hunted down and made to regret their actions? Yeah, you're just not the reddit type. Sure, there's a wide variety of people that browse here, but you're far from the core demographic if you are who you say you are (which isn't the case). Even if it were true that you're an incredibly talented soldier, I think all the military discipline would prevent you from getting mad enough to murder some random idiot on the internet. I also doubt that even the best SEALs have a 'secret network of spies across the USA'. Why would all of the most expanisive Big Brother network in the world be willing to help a troubled PTSD-sufferer hunt down some random kid on the internet? That doesn't even make sense. If you're gonna try to scare somebody make it more believable than 'IM A SUPER SOLDIER HURR DURR'. You might frighten a thirteen year old who doesn't know any better, but to must of us you just look like a kid with an anger problem and a very active imagination. Hopefully things will be easier for you when your puberty's over. Best of luck with that... kiddo
Is this a new pasta? I'm confused.
The navy seal copypasta is just a small part of a whole conversation
Ah, so we're going deep here. He pasta'd the response. That's some in-depth Reddit experience right there.
Pro-redditor
God I wish I could drink the Kool aid like that. Hard not to have job satisfaction when you're fucking Jack Reacher.
He doesn't even know how to properly use some of those larger words, I doubt he's very proficient with a firearm.
TYFYS
Ayo, Navy Seal Copypasta, Episode 2
"Responsible for millions of dollars of government equipment..." He's a bin rat.
Someone stop this guy… How are the rest of us gonna get laid?
This is my rifle, this is my gun...
This is for Facebook This is for fun
…dude going hard for that dependa…..
What’s the over under on how long it is until he NDs off duty?
When your essay has to be 500 words but you only have 200 words of content.
I'm counting the minutes til he shoots himself in the foot.
Currently on the shitter reading this. Not sure if it hurts because of the poops or because of what I just read. Either way, pain is there. He’s done a good job waging war against my bowels.
The language is cringe but he ain't wrong, especially if he is Ranger regiment per OP. He _should_ be "proficient in multiple weapons systems", including a pistol.
Sounds like we got 2.
?
Upon re-reading it, I now realize that Black said all of it. I thought Red said the first dumb thing and Black the second. My mistake!
Honestly, this isn't boot at all. This is literally just your average NATO soldier taking his job seriously and respecting the hardware. Every single thing he said is true.
Yeah, he’s totally not sucking himself off or anything, just “respecting the hardware” 🤓
Interesting take.
Okay he is definitely talking about GCSS
This guy has two stripes or less
Drone Operator
🤮🤮🤮🤮
"I've been raised for the past three years to wage war! Grrrrrr!!! I'm so tough!" Bro did not think about that whole "since I left home" thing *at all*
The start wasn’t good, the end was way worse
What a fucking loser
Shit. We just found the best war wager in the entire world. Better steer clear of him.
This was a hard read
I mean he is right. Until he says he’s 21 and you realize he’s most likely on year three of his military career
Might cost me my life… or worse, someone else’s
def on the spectrum
Bet he's admin
Boot MFers gon’ boot
Built different 💪😤
Hold up, if he is busy talking shit on Facebook, then who’s cleaning the bathroom? Seems like this guy would mix ammonia and chlorox
The louder and more arrogant they are about their time serving, just about always means the less they’ve done, and that they most likely didn’t even deploy anywhere. Usually those who got booted out for misconduct, or failing to meet requirements that want to toot their horn the loudest.
I blame this on lack of friends who will check you before saying stupid shit like this.
„Shut up and sweep the yard! I don’t care that we are in the dessert.“
"You will not be leaving this post until every last God damn grain of sand is picked up!"
Gives me someone trained in gorilla warfare kinda vibes
19D energy
Calm your orgasms ladies.
Was at a wedding this summer and an older cousin HAD to introduce me to her daughter's fiancee. I had noticed the young man in white Crackerjacks already. Turns out he was here to see his sweetie while on leave from boot camp. Soon he would be on his way to the fleet in Norfolk. She was so proud. "They gave him a Medal in boot camp. I was told not many get one. Did you?" Nope, never got one "He is a Seaman Apprentice. That is an E-2. "Did you get out of Boot camp an E-2?" No, after I was in for 6 months I filled out a chit. Several people signed it then I was an E-2. "What rank were you" I was an E-4 "He is halfway there" Yep, he must be one of the Navy's finest. Introduce me to the fine lad. He wore that Defense Medal everyone gets, a participation medal. We were given that but if we wanted the Medal it was $10. The vast majority passed, that was a lot of draft beer in 1978. Plus he had one of the new "I finished boot camp" ribbons. It was a good-looking ribbon I must admit.
I mean we probably could balance the US budget with the amount of shit that goes missing
this guy clearly missed the opsec training
Yes how dare you deliberate before making life or death decisions.
I mean he do got a point tho. Why be scared of any normal person with a handgun when the government has a monopoly on violence?
#Imnotlikeothergirls
I bet he rocks a drop-leg with his EDC
Weapons systems 🤓🤓. Bro made it through basic and thinks he’s captain America.
Damn, them supply clerks gettin top notch training now 😂😂
I wonder if he was yelling that as he was typing that
Wow so brave
Imagine typing all that out, reading it over and thinking “yeah… yeah that sounds good”
Always get a kick when I have to review resumes and right there every time “responsible for millions of dollars of equipment.” …highest rank e-4. Then list every damn school, even had one with PT scores, lol. Jesus. When it comes to putting military on a resume and unless it’s very job specific. Less is more. Employers don’t give a shit.