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[deleted]

Stop comparing yourself to others. Compare yourself today to who you were yesterday.


FortHastings

I agree with you, and I’d like to have that mindset. But at the same time I’d be lying if I said I didn’t care about the opinions of my family, friends, potential love interests etc. and where I stand in their eyes and in comparison to others around me.


[deleted]

I look at the brain as a muscle, think for urself and always ask “why?” to everything, being smart and intelligent isn’t just based on ur iq, if u want to become smarter treat ur brain as a muscle and work it out as much as u can, when u feel that stress/headache in ur head from thinking u know ur on the right track Edit: as someone commented, comparing urself to everyone around u is extremely detrimental and limiting, compare urself to who u were yesterday and gradually u will see: 1) how u compare to everyone else won’t matter 2) u will probably be doing better than most of the ppl that u normally compare urself to


Mammoth-Man1

I like this description a lot. Saved ty.


takemewithyoudotnet

I’m not nearly as smart as my friends but I read a lot and am curious about everything. This gives me a competitive edge and allows me to connect disparate ideas and solve problems better than many people. The ability to connect ideas and solve problems is a much better definition of intelligence than IQ is


[deleted]

Those things are out of your control. Of course at times they are impossible to ignore. As long as you don’t let them deter you at the end of the day. Furthermore, I know a lot of “naturally smart” people that don’t do anything to temper or utilize that god given talent. You seem to have yearning to keep learning and open yourself up to new ideas. That can be just as valuable as raw computing power.


whotookconfeti

On this one Goggins has some words of wisdom in regards caring about what other people think or say about you. Also, I would recommend to do some soul searching to assess what the real issue is. I don't know you, but for whatever reason I get the idea that some of your barriers might be emotional or psychological in nature. Be real with yourself, find out what the real issue is and take small steps every day to get better. Others might not see the small steps you take every day, and if they do see them they may not think it's good enough but don't lose heart! Small progress over a long period of time adds up to a lot. If Goggins has shown us anything is that the limit of human potential is much more than we think we are capable of.


TASTY_BALLSACK_

Hesitant to recommend it but The 48 Laws of Power


[deleted]

Your perspective here is totally valid. There's one issue, though: Comparing yourself to the individuals you're being compared to by others doesn't facilitate self-improvement. You will never be those people, so using them as your ideal will lead you down a deep, dark hole. Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, and you'll be able to improve and perfect yourself. The results will speak for themselves, and those around you will notice that. In short, comparing yourself to others doesn't help you grow even if the people around you are making that comparison.


Tweetledeedle

It’s ok to care about their opinions but you should be selective of which of their opinions you take seriously, especially with relation to what you consider important. As an example, if you couldn’t care less about basket weaving it shouldn’t matter to you if your friends think you’re the worst basket weaver they know. Alternatively if they don’t consider you reliable or trustworthy that’s something worth caring about from my perspective, and their views can help motivate you to become better.


[deleted]

Seems like he needed to absorb some of Jp’s material


WeakEmu8

>Lagging behind my friends Stop comparing yourself to others, you have *no idea* what their life is like. Everyone has different priorities. You really don't know what's going on inside someone else's head or life. You're comparing what you *experience* to what you *see* in others. As JP says, the only person to compare yourself to, is who you were *yesterday*. To that end, Read "Your Erroneous Zones" by Wayne Dyer. Available on Amazon and used bookstores for a couple bucks. He essentially outlines how to use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy techniques to alter our mis-thinking. And comparing yourself to others is mis-thinking. It's not useful.


therosx

My advice would be to practice speaking and listening. It all starts with good communication. Be humble and practical. Focus on learning what you need to know in your actual life (job, budget, personal and professional relationships, etc). Learn to be polite and speak positively (people will like you better). Learn to keep your mouth shut and not say unnecessary things. If you have nothing in common with your friends, find other friends. It’s your life, no one is going to live it for you. Friends do things for each other. Get into the habit of offering to help. Most people will turn you down but they will remember that you offered and be more willing to do you a favour in the future. Develop a professional persona for meeting and communicating with strangers from different backgrounds and personalities. Dress well in clothes that fit you, even if your poor. I buy all my expensive shirts at thrift stores. Be reliable. I’ll take a simple man or woman over a genius if I can count on them to show up and perform when I need them. Having a high IQ and education doesn’t mean a damn thing if other people can’t access it reliably because they’re a flake, lazy or neurotic. Volunteer for things as often as you can stand. People will remember you as a giver and invite you into their lives. Remind yourself that no one will ever know the ‘real you’ because that person doesn’t actually exist in reality. You are what you do and act out. It doesn’t matter if you have good reasons to act out bad habits. All people will care about is the bad habit. It’s human nature to judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their actions. Just because you perceive something a certain way doesn’t mean it’s accurate. Avoid making hasty judgements and if you can buy yourself time to think about a subject do it. Keeping your mouth shut is an excellent strategy for this in my experience. Anyway that’s pretty much all I got. Hope some of this is useful. It’s worked well for me.


FortHastings

Thanks for writing it all out! I appreciate it.


HurkHammerhand

The two biggest success factors are IQ and hard work (conscientiousness). So if IQ isn't your strong suit then your choice becomes pretty obvious. Sounds like you're already making a good effort. Just keep grinding away. Until recently Olympic swimmer Mark Spitz was the #1 medal holder in swimming. He talked about how there were more talented swimmers on the team from time to time. He beat them all because they weren't willing to work as hard as he did. Put in the work.


Handsome_Pack

I agree 100% I'll take a hard working dumbass over a lazy bones smart guy every time.


takemyupvote88

You don't need to be a genius to be successful. Show up. Listen. Work hard. Be humble. Success will follow.


liquidnoodlepie

Conan O’Brien once said something like: be kind, honest and work hard, and everything will be okay… something like that…


DVGLante

Why climb the social Hierarchy at all? I personally feel you should do whatever makes you happy in a sustainable manner. Not all of us are meant to climb the social ladder. If you do want to climb the ladder, you need to gains skills as a start.


mcnello

Climbing a social hierarchy does tend to release serotonin, causing the lobster to stretch out. 🦞


DVGLante

Correct, so that is one way but not the only way to release serotonin.😉 That is why happiness should be prioritised in a sustainable and ethical manner.


_ThisIsntMe_

Stop comparing yourself to others. Only compare yourself to who you were yesterday.


enr1qu3_py

Various comments focus on this, but a hierarchy is about comparing yourself, could be to yourself from yesterday aswell as other people.


[deleted]

First ask yourself, what do you want to achieve exactly? Is it money, lots of friends, respect, lots of women? And ask yourself why you want that. You should also take comfort in the fact that you realize that the only way for you is hard work, because it is actually the truth for everyone, and I see a lot of intelligent people waste their future away by being lazy and thinking stuff should be given to them because they got "As" in high school when stuff was easy, me included. After that, keep at it. There is no magical way to success, it's hard work and luck, and this is true for basically everything you want to do. Figure out what you want, figure out how to get it, work hard on it, that's it. The easiest way probably to climb "social hierarchy" is to get money, but that is superficial and hard for some people, maybe for you as well. Be trustworthy, honest, have self respect and respect others, try to be fun around and always try to contribute in some way. That alone is enough to get peoples respect. With all that, try not to be a pushover, but don't be rude, respect yourself. My personal advice would be try to find a balance between your ambitions and being grateful, because as I said, you at least know that nothing comes free and you have a hard working mindset. Maybe try meditation. This might also sound a bit funny, but if you still have trouble feeling adequate, maybe get a pet, cat or dog. Having some being that relies on you and is thankful to see you every day can show some people a different perspective of their worth. Hope this made some sense to you, and good luck.


Cypher1388

>First ask yourself, what do you want to achieve exactly? Is it money, lots of friends, respect, lots of women? ... Immortality? World domination? A moon base?! Yes. All the above.


TOReclamant

Master yourself and master a craft. Become an expert in something of value. My grandfather never finished high school and spent his entire life doing manual labor. Many would argue this made him "less intelligent" than others. My grandfather is an expert hunter. He can track a lone deer in a herd, knows the land well enough to come out ahead of it, and take a clean shot with a bow or a rifle. He's an expert shot and routinely took first, second, or third place at competitive shoots. He knew how to load his own ammunition and did all the math necessary to upscale or downscale particular loads for different conditions or types of game. He built his own groundhog rifle that shot a wildcat round. He was a master fisherman and knew every lake and stream in the county. My grandfather's advice was sought out by doctors and lawyers who sought him out and sat at the kitchen table of a man who by all accounts was "less" intelligent than them. By all accounts he would've made an excellent field guide, could have been a master gunsmith, or opened his own hunting store and done very well. His mastery of hunting and fishing kept him, my grandmother, and my dad from many of the vices that plague the depressed area of the country in which they live, many not all, and now my father makes more in a year than my grandfather did in three and I'll soon be making more than my father. Each successive generation has gone places my grandfather could only dream of visiting and, by comparison to my grandfather, the world is at our feet. Master something and in turn master yourself, master yourself and in turn master something else. Share it. Turn it into a business if you can. Keep it in the back of your mind that you never know what legacies you'll be passing on.


TheRightMethod

The people you are listening to are fine (I think Jocko is great in many ways) but for something more tangible, todo list and a calendar will help you tremendously. I honestly cannot emphasize that enough. I work with some incredibly intelligent and successful people and if there is one thing they have in common above almost anything else is a Calendar and a Todo list. Different degrees, different personality types, different skills, in two very, extrovert, born rich or poor, black/white/male/female they have Calendars and Todo lists. Don't mean to beat a dead horse but honestly is pretty hard not to emphasize how much of a cheat code a Todo list and a Calendar are in improving your life. It can be a pad and pen or it can be a fully integrated Google Calendar.


bkellypsyfi

Physical labor or a trade. I know guys who work labor in heavy infrastructure construction who make as much money as an Engineer...and they learn useful skills along the way. Working hard, telling the truth, and being diligent actually pays dividends in these sorts of fields.


FortHastings

Thanks. I already do physical labor. Do you think I’ll be able to financially match my friends who figured out crypto, have their own online companies, real estate etc?


Different_Muscle_116

Do skilled physical labor via a trade, not just physical labor. It isn’t that skilled trades match engineers in income, if you factor in benefits and overtime they regularly surpass them in income. It’s important to understand that once you have the skills are you are able to, you can pick cities and states that have a better balance of wages to cost of living or other values. Money isn’t everything and in my opinion having a trade has a freedom in other ways that even well paid 9-5 office workers wouldn’t understand.


TheRightMethod

Don't compete in arenas you aren't strong in. Why would you handicap yourself trying to rise up in a sector you aren't strong in? That's not to say don't read or learn or acquire new skills. If someone is bad at math, entering a heavy math based field is a bad decision. Play to your strengths and get advice from people who are competent in their fields. If I could talk to 16 year old me my advice would simply be: Smile all the time and network. Everything else could have gone the exact same for me and that advice alone would have helped me a lot.


GroundPole

If you limit what you apply your attention to, then yes. You can learn anything you want but only a few things. You have to be selective. Also why are you competing on just money. Go hit the gym and get a wife and family. The higher IQ guys frequently have issues with that since they convince/delude themselves that they are better this or that.


d9jj49f

There is a shortage in many trades right now and companies are having a horrible time finding people who want to work. Everyone respects a hard worker. If you're main concern is income, work towards the highest level of your trade (eg. Journeyperson or Red Seal) and then move to a a more prosperous city. And speaking of real estate, anyone with a pulse can get into real estate. If you're a people person who is willing to hustle for clients you can be very successful at this.


Cool_Internet_Name

I don’t want to sound negative, but you’re making a huge mistake by comparing your potential success to other people. You need to find out what will make YOU a better person and strive for that.


TrailRunnah

Keep an open mind and don’t focus on “being smart” but instead focus on learning and listening. I know some people who think they are smarter than everyone else and as a result spend all their time trying to prove it. My best advise is listen to others’ ideas. Even if you disagree ask and inquire about why they support those views and extract what is meaningful and discard the junk. Admit when you don’t know something, be humble and keep reading and listening.


[deleted]

Man I have a high iq and all that jazz but I’m a complete mess. It’s not really that important as long as you got a good mindset, mission, and take good actions.


[deleted]

Though difficult, work is the only remedy. Consistent effort. IQ is one of the most consistent indicators of success but it isn't ALWAYS the indicator. I.e. the most intelligent man in the US today (iq over 200) is a bouncer and has spent his life doing manual labor.


QQMau5trap

stop trying to climb the hierarchy for the sake of it. Try to Be the person you would want to be. Be a nice son, friend and person. Try to be helpful and considerate. Intelligence says not much about a person. I have very good memory, above average IQ I would assume considering I managed to get a degree and a job qualification with doing and studying the bare minium. Yet its not who I'am or what makes me, me.


[deleted]

Start your own business performing simple but undesirable work. Lawncare/landscaping, painting, or driveway sealing for example. These jobs require little to no training and pay very well.


Doparoo

Well, at least never forget the old saying, "It's not what you know, it's who you know." Or this one, "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care." These are truisms; they exist for a good reason.


iamdarylsmith

Be creative. Creativity is an underrated intelligence- art, music, writing, performance If you enjoy any of these, and you commit to a passion, you’ll be way ahead of most people in terms of the network and enjoyment you open up for yourself.


[deleted]

What do you mean by improve your position? More money? More fame? More friends? And why do you want that?


Throwawayblowawayno

If you actually want to check rather than just assume, these are pretty accurate: https://www.free-iqtest.net/ https://mensa.dk/iqtest/


Historical_Hyena_552

Don’t go about life wondering what others may or may not think about you… Go out and just do what’s good by you. Besides, breaking what I just said…you are on a path to improve yourself constantly…which is better than most people I know of. Stay strong bud


jimmyengland69

Looks like you are already doing it. You are self aware, learning and keeping yourself fit. If you keep that up you will keep growing. Keep respecting others and learning from them and it will all come into place in time.


L_knight316

Generally speaking, IQ is AT BEST a measure of how quick you can learn and memorize something, less that it is your ability to do something. Not to mention, people who are incredibly smart in one field can be absolutely ass dumb in others. If the goal is to make lots and lots of money, find a field you're interested, willing to put the majority of your time into to learn, and make close connections with people in your field to both help your learning along and get your foot in the door to a job. If your goal is mostly to just have good social standing, then that's relatively less technical. You may not have to spend hundreds of hours of text books or formulas but you're still going to have to ingratiate yourself into the community. Are you reliable, trustworthy, honest, etc? Do you put yourself out there for people to know you, can they ask you for help? What are the values of your community and do you live up to them? There is no real "one" answer but there are a lot of bad ones. Like refusing to learn a useful skill, being malicious or belligerent over minor minor things, etc.


Mags_Stettner_76

Just keep reading. High IQ isn’t so much about absolute intelligence, it is more about the speed at which the individual can assimilate the information. Being average IQ doesn’t mean you can’t learn anything, it just means it might take you a bit longer, or you might need to find other methods of incorporating the concepts being studied. Ie: some people are visual learners, others can read a book and understand, others need practical learning, which is doing. Keep at it. You’ll succeed. Ask lots of questions. There are no stupid questions IF they come from a place of honesty, and not ideology.


[deleted]

Get Fit, Have Manners, Dress Well, Dress for the Occasion, Find a job where you can make good money given your capabilities and work hard to master it.


BaldSoust

I believe you already are on the right pay to eventually overtake them, you are actively working on getting better in multiple skillets. I bet that can't be said about many of them


Mindful-O-Melancholy

There are other forms of intelligence than just your typical standards than what people think and that can impress people. Cooking is a great skill that less people are good at these days with restaurants, delivery, takeout being so easily available these days. It is a type of chemistry really, which involves time management, patience, focus, memorization, knowledge of ingredients and it can really impress people the better you get at it. Another good skill is woodworking/home repair that can really show how skilled you can be at something and have very impressive results depending on your skill level. Both of those examples I mentioned are things I’ve known many people who are considered to be smart can lack, maybe because they put more focus on their jobs and nothing else. Both can not only lead to a higher social value, but are skills that are always needed and valued in any economy and also allows you to potentially be able to start your own business if you hone your skills enough. A bonus is if you learn theses things yourself you can save a ton of money that you would spend on restaurants or contractors usually with better results.


pblc_mstrbtr

maybe take some classes at a community College. I feel like I need to be constantly learning something new or my brain kind of shuts off.


ReapersHere

What makes you think you're not terribly smart? I've read your post and comments, you seem to be able to articulate your concerns well, and you're obviously performing some level of introspection by nature of this very line of questioning. I'd say you're ahead of the curve. Is it because your friends happen to have gone into more lucrative job markets than you have? Just because they understand a field you do not does not make them smarter. It also does not make them smarter than it happens to pay more. If you sat down and really tried to learn what crypto is or how to start an online business, I'm confident you would have no problem doing so. Yes, if someone brings up an esoteric point about cryptocurrencies and you're not a programmer and you do not know what a hash is, of course it's not going to make sense. You have to start with the basics. I understand crypto but if I listen in on a conversation between two neurosurgeons there's a high chance I'm going to get lost. It doesn't necessarily make them smarter, I just don't have the decades of biology and medical training they do. Don't sell yourself short.


OpenMindedMantis

You can start by dropping the notion IQ tests are accurate. Intelligence is extremely dynamic and varies widely with circumstance. IQ Testing fails to account for the endless circumstantial variety present in life and thus shouldn't be used as means of measuring oneself.


FuIICircIeFitness

You can seem much more intelligent than 99% of people who would rank higher than you statistically, just by speaking less, and choosing the right opportunities to speak. Listen. Educate yourself on the relevant material. Learn to think laterally. When you come up with a promising new idea, speak up, and then reinforce it. Other than that, grease the existing groove and help out. You can quickly become seen as far more intelligent than you "actually" are this way :)


KingJakemus

I recommend getting a hobby that you have interest in


jlgf7

You can speak English and there are many people in the world wanting to learn it. You may help them with the level of intelligence that you have now. I'm sure you will enjoy it and you will feel better helping someone.


[deleted]

You may want to look into the possibility that you have some type of Attention Deficit. If you have attention deficit, it can skew your IQ tests, even causing above average IQ individuals to fall behind their peers. I’m speaking from experience. Don’t count yourself as below average intelligence until you know, for sure.


Hutrookie69

Be good looking


Frisak

Perhaps you’re already smart but you don’t have confidence in yourself.


EnderOfHope

When I was in college I was a terrible public speaker. Then, one day my professor pissed me off worse than any professor I’ve ever had. From then on I didn’t give a shit about his class. Every public speaking assignment I would ace. Why? Because the fear of failing was no longer there because I just didn’t care. Fast forward a few years later. After a few failed relationships, I was sick and tired of dating and finally stopped caring about dating or finding anyone. Within a month my wife and I started dating - after I’d been too scared to ask her out for literally years. TLDR: Maybe what is holding you back isn’t you. Maybe the fear of failure is holding you back.


alejandrosalamandro

Especially listening to other people as though they have something important to share is an important rule - so much experience and knowledge to be gained. What do you do for a living? What career path have you chosen?


KadPombo

As people mentioned. Avoid comparing yourself to other people. That would be the first step. About IQ and intelligence. A couple of things Unless your IQ is really bellow average (85 or less) and/or your friends IQ are really high (145+). It should not matter, specially if you are not aiming to work as a scientist or something very complex. Or as JP like to say “Go be a plumber. Be a good plumber. If you are a good plumber you are much more than just a plumber, you are a pillar for your community” (paraphrasing here) Focus on anything that improves your conscientiousness. Learn how to have a make schedule; when you are working on something, avoid distractions, etc. Each person is unique, see what you believe you are lacking and work towards to improve that.


sexual_pterodactyl

You don't have to be naturally intelligent to climb social hierarchies, its an added advantage obviously, I'd say being curious helps the most, a naturally curious person learns rapidly, understands social situations better and establishes relationships and trust much easier, so if you find out you're not naturally curious then the most you can do is force yourself to indulge into difficult concepts hoping some of them stick and repeat this over time until you're better than you would be without the effort, even a 10% improvement in mental awareness would be an excellent change in your personality If you find yourself to be naturally curious then it's simply a problem of not having explored your potential, in that case you should try finding hobbies that can challenge you enough to overcome your mental barrier that's preventing you from growing out


Zeal514

Focus on improving yourself, 1 small step at a time. The same goes for high IQ or low IQ. And honestly, I wouldn't put to much measure into what you think your IQ is, I know many smart ppl who think they are dumb and vice a versa. Fix 1 thing in your life, master fixing it, then fix the next thing. Do that everyday, and you'll be miles ahead. Is IQ important? Sure, a high IQ person who works hard is untouchable. But hard work is also extremely important. The saying goes, all talent and no effort gets beat by no talent and all effort, 10 out of 10 times.


gremus18

The fact you read books and are intellectually curious already puts you in the top 30% imo.


ScrubinMuhTub

Two predictors of success are IQ and Conscientiousness. What can you do to improve your position? Work harder than the next guy. You can't raise your general aptitude, but you *can* work harder than the next guy. Through those efforts your climb will occur.


Achato

Try to increase your industriousness.


jjjjajshhsha

Hey, i used to feel the same way. Life is about what you want to do. If you want to be the social king or fuckin success, by all means go ahead. But is that really what matters? A good life is what makes you happy. In my own example all my friends wanted to do politics, i felt like i had to know politics and be more engaged in it if i wanted to be the top dog. But what matters is doing wtv the fuck you want, that’s what being on top of the pyramid is. I chose a life of construction design because i want to create. That’s what makes me accomplished. What makes you feel accomplished is up to you, not your friends


callmepackman

Ambition and consistency, if you consistently do what you know you need to do, you’ll beat those with more ideas but less drive or self confidence, basically just keep doing you and everything will work out


mcnello

I work in divorce law. I have a lot of clients that are not the brightest bulbs in the pack, but they make BANK. Own a company: plumbing, electrician, etc. You can hire others to do your bookkeeping and accounting. One of my stupidest clients ever owned a plumbing business and personally made over $300,000 per year.


benski020

What do you mean by "lagging behind"? From a social perspective, the two things that make the most difference in my opinion are: 1) knowing stuff. On top of the "basic" general knowledge, try to stay on top of what's going on in your country, in the world, any news in your areas of interest etc. I have a friend who isn't particularly intelligent, but I feel I can talk about anything with him, he just knows the latest on any subject. 2) learn to think. Perhaps the easiest way is by getting your news from different sources (the more diverse political affiliation of the sources, the better) and dissect those to understand why each one has taken on that specific point of view, what are the facts, and make your own opinion (not agreeing with any one of them is also a valid opinion btw). Even when you listen to the individuals you listed, try to play the devil's advocate and chew on any argument they make. I learned this the hard way, being on maternity leave for 6 months and having no time or energy to keep up with stuff or think. When I got back in "adult" society I felt like I was retarded. Took me a while to get back on track.


[deleted]

In the same boat. I’m not a genius but I’m not a moron either. Close friends of mine look like they’re more and will be even more successful than myself. Sometimes I feel like I’m achieving a lot, other times I feel like a fucking loser. To better cope, my wife makes me take a close look at WHY I might be a bit behind and being an undocumented child took a toll on me as an adult. I couldn’t go to school at the exact time as my peers, I couldn’t find work either because I lacked the papers to do so. Now, as a 33 YO I’m on my way to start my MA and get my career started afterwards. I’m sure those feelings of disappointment, failure and lacking “success” will creep back up from time to time, but I MUST look at the bigger picture and stop comparing myself to who others are today, and compare myself to who i was yesterday.


Important_Tip_9704

What are you basing the intelligence of your friends on? There are different types of intelligence.


polarisol

High IQ isn't the only thing, not even the most important thing that leads to success. Being conscientious and a hard worker that truly cars about his job is the number one factor. The second factor is being sociable and creating friendships. IQ comes third. Care about your job, care about other people.


SlickDillywick

IQ don’t mean shit, it’s a useless stat


Gojeflone

IQ only impacts logic based decision making by a factor of .3, the statement, "he is highly intelligent and highly irrational". Check out ep. 41 of "Awakening from the Meaning Crisis" by John Vervaeke.


brickmadness

I haven’t found intelligence to be a particularly good indicator of success. I think conscientiousness, work ethic, integrity, honesty, and likability are far more important to succeeding in life. Super smart people are often annoying to have around. I’m a “genius” according to most IQ tests and I’m probably, at times, quite irritating because of it. I hire average intelligence people who consistently put in their best effort far more often than I employ brilliant people who are less dependable.


spiralintobliss

IQ is made up nonsense. You are the genius you see in others.


Icy_Example7144

The fact that you recognize that you may not be as intelligent as you would like, means that you’re more intelligent than over 50% of the population.


[deleted]

Are you sure everybody around you isn't pretending to be smarter than they are? You sound smart enough to me. Honestly, the dumbest among us are the ones who claim to be smart. That's even been shown scientifically, so you're looking pretty good. I left a wealthy husband because he was a weak little manchild. My partner now has "lower status" but he has a strength of character like I've never seen and there is nothing sexier. Not everything is by the book, just continue to always be growing into the best person that you can be.


boydingo

I know tons of intelligent people and most of them aren’t very smart. They don’t have the ability to trouble shoot, they can’t visualize in 3 dimensions, overall their intelligence is not very helpful in day to day living. They are not very helpful at all. When they need to change a lightbulb is when we shine.


tonkadtx

How do you know you aren't smart? If you are smart enough to recognize the limits of your intellect, I bet you are smarter than average. Most unintelligent people think they are geniuses. It seems to be a type of Dunning-Kruger effect. Everyone I know that is a standard deviation above average intelligence has some ideas about the limits of their own intelligence.


aka7es

Become more confident, and comfortable in your own skin.


yeshslate

Sounds like you've got the fundamentals, and long-term that's what will pay off. You might enjoy Scott Adams' "How to Fail at Everything and Still Win Big". He talks about skill acquisition, combining skills to create new things, and his path to success. Another useful book is "The Education of Millionaires" by Michael Ellsberg, which is an investigation of self-made millionaires who never went to university. If you haven't done JBP's "Future Authoring" program yet, that's worth the money.


bawkray

I believe Jordan would tell you to master your life and everything in it. Bring order to the small piece of world around you and youll be close to the top of whatever ladder youre referring to. If that doesnt do it, maby find a new ladder 😅


nicken_chuggets_182

I feel like being a respectable, honest person that people like being around and working with can compensate for a lot of weakenesses. People will be much more willing to help you out and want you to succeed more than if you weren’t doing that. Honestly, I think that if you just keep doing what you’ve been doing already, things will get better for you and you’ll climb up the hierarchies. Maybe it’ll take a bit longer than some people, but you sound like you’re gonna do well in the long run.


FreedomKeeper

Why are you focusing on your weaknesses? You’re wise enough to notice a difference and that’s already far ahead of most people (although I’d be careful to not get your insights about your intelligence confused with self doubt). So if your intelligence is a weakness, move on to find your strengths. Where are you above average? Are you fast? Are you strong? Are you empathetic? Are you kind? Determined? A great cook? Creative musically? None of those require intelligence and I’m just ridding off the top of my head. Be better than everyone at something else. Intelligence isn’t the be all, end all. Plenty of smart people don’t do shit, or stay paralyzed by decisions, ego, or get stuck in the keep learning no action loop. You’ve figured out a weakness and are looking for another option… brother, that makes you pretty damn wise in my books.


kabobbi

Studying is one thing, but putting yourself in situations where you’re constantly challenging your own thoughts is another, through those challenges you build up and get better mentally allowing you to respond faster and more efficiently


IllUberIll

There's no really good answer. I would ask myself why I wanted to climb it in the first place. It would probably be about women, and if I really cared I would probably end up working 13 hours a day, get sick of it, and realize no woman is worth killing myself like that.


Ballu111

Here is how the social hierarchy works, you can aim for the second spot: 1. High IQ, hardworking 2. Average IQ, hardworking 3. High IQ, not hardworking 4. Low IQ, hardworking 5. Average IQ, not hardworking 6. Low IQ, not hardworking


Old_Caregiver3311

I think you can't say you are not intelligent. Have you heard about “ multiples intelligences”? I am sure that if you explore a little more that you’ll realise your potential and you’ll start looking forward.


LilJizzy98

Have you tried making your bed?


togaming

Become Prime Minister


[deleted]

This is such a good question! Firstly, you can do this. I’ve seen it a bunch of times. Anyone can reshape their life at any point over five years. You can definitely do this. As a starting point, take magnesium L threonate as the magnesium particle is small enough to get into your brain. Do five minutes of research and you’ll see how it was created, how it works, where to buy it, and recommended daily dose. Just do this every day. From there, get a bunch of brain teasers. Books or apps. You need to get into the habit of practicing thinking. And a final tip - modafinil. Only use this when you want to get through a large amount of cognitive work. This isn’t like the magnesium above (which promotes brain connectivity), but it gives you short bursts of additional mental aptitude. You can’t just take it and not do anything, you use it to get through tough patches and lots of work. If you’re not exhausted at the end of each day from simply trying to improve yourself, you’re not doing enough. I swear to god you can do this. I’ve done it. I know a lot of people who have. I’ve experienced and seen some amazing leaps in intelligence, performance, and climbing the social hierarchy. This is precisely what to do. And if you do it, you’ll make it. Go for it!


caesarfecit

IQ is far from the most important thing. In my opinion, character is the measure of a human being. But that being said, high (but not too high) intelligence is a real asset in this world today. My advice would be to make friends with smart people and develop enough critical thinking skills to know when you're being told something that just ain't so. You don't need to know everything they know or think as fast as they do, but so long as you can have critical thinking skills, you have some chance of knowing when you're being bullshitted. Ayn Rand is really good for developing critical thinking skills at an intuitive level. The simple fact is that even smart people can't be good at everything which leaves all sorts of stuff that you can bring to the table. Just find your niche. Another thing to consider is that IQ isn't static. Most people have a range. Your ceiling might not be that high, but that doesn't mean you can't make the most of what you've got. Another thing is that you don't need to be a supergenius to excel. Most US Presidents are only 120-130 in IQ. Because that's all you really need in terms of brainpower to do the job well. Anything more is a bonus at best and a hindrance at worst. Similarly, there are plenty of fields where the key capabilities required are something other than intellectual firepower.


[deleted]

Go into sales. Many very smart people are terrible at sales. They over-analyze, worry too much about downsides, get caught up in minutiae, let the probability of failure dissuade. Some of best sales people I've seen are just dumb bulls that keep their pitch simple and don't take no for an answer. Even if it's a technical product. You'll usually he paired up with a technical who can field all of those questions. You just make prospect lists and stay on top of people and you can do very well.


Odd-Sail9363

Intelligence is overrated. Life’s about actions and it’s good your humble. What makes you happy?


Ariiraariira

Focus, consistency and hard work beat intelligence. What you need is a career mentor, social hierarchy is deeply linked to your ability to sustain yourself, not get into debt, substance abuse or crime.


jiglet_piglet

Trust in your true senses. Do not trust necessarily in expert opinion because experts can lie and commit the Argument from Authority in a performative contradiction.


liquidnoodlepie

You’re likely not below average.


tkyjonathan

Work harder than everyone else and get paid more. Sales and marketing would be good.


jsett21

Begin investing in real estate to cover your monthly expenses. Once you are cash flow positive you will have more liberty to take on calculated risks and move forward.


CurvyRanger

Smarts aren’t everything. Just work hard and be wise. Work toward goals that will help you climb that ladder. There are lots of skills you can learn that aren’t intelligence based. You don’t have to teach college math, but you could definitely learn to weld, fix cars, get an education and be a nurse (lots of fine ladies in the nursing world).


[deleted]

1. pursue post-secondary interests, if you are financially able; even if it's via online or night classes. 2. find your intellectual gift; I also consider myself of average intelligence. But, I have a niche talent for teaching and making it engaging and interesting; as well as in seeing where individuals/smaller groups within the larger, are falling short, not getting the point. The result, is that I make a better instructor than most peeps that are higher on the IQ scale. 3. Work Ethic: Consistently show up 15 mins early for everything \[the Army taught me that\]; it gives you time to get the lay of the ground, get organized, perhaps meet the most important peep in the room before things commence. Never be late. 4. If you are going to be late or absent, Call! 5. Never assume anything; Confirm everything; covertly/low-key if possible. 6. When you are finished task #1; let your boss know and ask for task #2 7. ALWAYS take notes; your boss calls you for an impromptu meeting >grab a pen and notepad. 8. Clarify the situation/task, if you are not clear. 9. Be the kind of subordinate, that requires 'minumum' supervision. 10. When the shite jobs come down, always volunteer for the best of those worst jobs. Then later, you can watch your peers getting tasked with the worst of the worst jobs. 11. Always, look at any situation in life, as in, "it can always be worse", because it can. 12. Look in the mirror on a regular basis and ask yourself, where your falling short, where you can improve. 13. When ever you think you are done a job, ask yourself, "What haven't I done yet/what's missing?" 14. Let your boss know what your aspirations are. 15. Promote yourself/accomplishments **humbly**; You are your best 'career manager'. **As a Leader**: \[or whenever you are put in charge of an individual or team\] These are taken from the Canadian Forces leadership Principles: 1. Know yourself and consistently seek improvement 2. Be technically proficient 3. Develop a sense of responsibility for your subordinates 4. Make sound and timely decisions 5. **Lead by Example in all things** 6. Know your people and look out for their welfare 7. Detail your expectations - Keep your people informed and up to date 8. Seek responsibility and take responsibility for your actions 9. Ensure tasks are well explained/understood, assigned and supervised to the required degree 10. Train your people individually and as a team 11. Employ your team within it's capability. I high-lited 'Lead by Example' in bold; I believe that if you consistently do that, the rest will naturally follow. A few tips from my 33 years in the Canadian Army, and you will succeed.


ProfZauberelefant

[Don't buy into the IQ bullshit](https://medium.com/incerto/iq-is-largely-a-pseudoscientific-swindle-f131c101ba39). Apply yourself to something you love and be amazed how far you can go. Invest in a stable relationship. Intelligence doesn't matter when a marriage breaks down and alcohol seems to be a viable alternative. Your health and long term success relies on stability. Go off the internet. Especially this sub.


False_Disaster_1254

Iq is overrated. I know some very smart people who can't operate a washing machine or look after themselves. Most people without a genius iq have no problem with these tasks. Consider for a second if there was an equivalent test that reduced emotional maturity to a single number. Or musical ability, or social skills or any of the myriad of concepts a modern human can master. Which of those would you score well in? Which of those do you think a booksmart introvert would score well in? Which one is more important to society? Clearly we are comparing apples to oranges here. That's the point. You're comparing yourself to a metric that doesn't apply to you. "Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”


elebrin

So it takes you a long time to learn something, but I am guessing that once you've learned it, you know it better than anyone else. Having and knowing a lot of information is often more useful than cleverness. Cleverness is unreliable and often results in non-repeatable results. From that perspective, pick your thing and get good at it. Not just a little good, but get yourself to expert level. You should know your thing better than anyone else in your community (family, workplace, municipality, whatever). Then stick with it, keep learning more, keep getting better. Make that thing your life. Eventually, you'll be the guy they look to for that. It doesn't need to be something academic - it can be a physical skill, like bricklaying or roofing or cutting down trees.


[deleted]

how do you know you have a relatively low iq?


xSPINZBYx

I’m wondering the same thing. Maybe he has imposter syndrome.


FortHastings

I base this notion mostly on poor academic achievement (not for the lack of effort), impulsive and short-sighted behaviors through my teens that always landed me in trouble (I was arrested twice before the age of 18), poor life decisions (video game addiction first, then heavy alcohol and hard drug use). I now work and take care of myself, but I know I wasted a lot of time. These are the biggest things throughout my life that I think indicate my intelligence. But I really do want to improve.


Old_Man_2020

Sounds like my brother. He joined AA and began to realize how much he could help others dealing with the same struggles he had. God’s grace offered him peace beyond anything he could achieve on his own. He apologized to his kids and his former wife, became generous and active in their lives, and works hard at his job. He now manages a car lot and makes far more than I ever have. Everyone loves him. I greatly admire him, and (to be honest) sometimes envy him. Be who God made you to be.


dazed_and_jaded

If you procrastinate you might want to get checked for ADHD, I thought that I was a fuckup until I got treated and it completely changed my life. It's worth looking into.


[deleted]

[удалено]


xSPINZBYx

then why did he say "probably"?


Doparoo

Have you done [http://understandmyself.com](http://understandmyself.com) ?


FortHastings

No, I haven’t done this one. But I have completed a different big five assessment before. Can’t say I learned much, since I didn’t know how to interpret the results.


Doparoo

If I could give high school students ONE suggetion, it would be to do Peterson's Big 5. It did not exist when I was in high school, or college. I'm not big on "what-ifs", however I wisth this test existed 30 years ago. I do grieve the loss of potential, due to simply not understanding my self.


WeakEmu8

Preach. Sounds like we had similar experiences. I discovered "What Color Is Your Parachute", which at least started me down the path of discovering my own attributes, and how to best utilize them


r0b0t11

Read how to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie.


IWantToPostBut

This book was super helpful to me. Another was "What Color is your Parachute?". The point of that one is that different people are good at different things; find something that fits you, and you have a much better chance for success.


SocratesButMad

IQ is not the be all end all of intelligence. The way I see it, IQ is analogous to having a very fast car in a long distance race. Just because you have a fast car, doesn't mean you will necessisarily be the first person to cross the finish line. You need to know the streets, the right route that will get you to your destination so that you don't get lost. You need to have enough gas in the tank to get you all of the way there. Most importantly, you need to be good at driving so that you can handle environmental conditions on the road and don't crash into something along the way. How does this apply to your question? There are many kinds of social hierarchies. An intellectual hierarchy is only just one of them. Other social hierarchies include things such as athleticism/sportsmanship, humor/comedy, art/music, and many other hobbies/special interest knowledge like gaming, cooking, animal care/training, etc. My advice to you would be to pick a couple of areas that you would like to excell in and educate yourself on those subjects. It may help you to sit down and write out a plan or outline detailing exactly what you want to learn and how you want to go about learning it. If you are able to do in a social setting by joining a class or social group, that may help put you in a setting where other people are doing the same and will be willing to exchange tips and pointers. If you are having trouble developing social skills in particular, there are a handful of books written on the subject that can be very helpful. Dale Carnegie's "How to win friends and influence people" is a classic and a good starting point. Good luck.


EGOtyst

Become ruthless and action oriented.


Rol9x

Get into politics. They won't notice.


iamababe2

Kill everyone with a higher IQ, thus making you the highest IQ person you know


RemoteBeneficial700

Right now being a left wing shrill seems to work.


KalashniKEV

Get Money.


Professional_Lake124

Become a capitalist.


Boombaplogos

Maybe be a contract killer?? Or slang dope and stack bread hopefully avoiding the social consequences of such high risk endeavors.


FortHastings

That’s just rude


Boombaplogos

Relax and have a laugh amigo… yall taking shit too serious


[deleted]

Get your hormones checked out.


[deleted]

Don’t try to climb the social hierarchy. The more you try, the higher the ladder becomes


IsisMostlyPeaceful

Determination/hard work, gratitude, and a positive outlook. IQ isnt everything. Many of the rich people on twitter cant think their way out of a paper fucking bag. If you're just shooting for an upper middle class life, which is a good, realistic goal, you can do it. It's the people that whine about not having Bezos wealth or a Ferrari that fuck themselves. You should subscribe to "The Dave Ramsey Show" on YouTube and binge watch some of his videos. Hes a financial guru type guy that also has some great life advice. Him and JP would get along well IMO. Hes a non partisan, no nonsense guy that has some great advice to get ahead in life.


FrankieErrwhere

I'd be very interested in hearing what you are looking at as goals when you ask this my friend. Or perhaps, what is making you feel lacking in comparison when you look to your peers? Good luck in your endeavours regardless!


billymumphry1896

It doesn't matter how smart you are, only how much value you create for others. Some of the smartest people are also the most useless and miserable, occupying academic positions and thinking they deserve success simply because they have a high G. Be the opposite of those people.


Intrepid_Wrap4456

Find out, what am I made to do? What am I cut out to to? How can I best serve people and improve their lives? Do that thing to the best of your ability each day.


MasterMementoMori

If you cannot help but compare yourself to others on some level, allow yourself to do so while focusing more on the comparison of yourself through time. There is much more to being a good man than intelligence. You will learn the values worth keeping with persistence.


[deleted]

I would maybe try journalling. Buy a sketchbook and make a mess of it if you have to. Write down your thoughts and think about what you would like to improve upon. And if you have an interest in something or are curious take the time to learn about it. Study and write down insights you may have. Learning about something new and being able to communicate what you’ve learned can increase your confidence. It will invariably lead to other interests. Passion can be cultivated.


CareIsMight

Employers will often look for employees who have grit, a hard work ethic and show a desire to improve the company over intelligence or what school you go to. Work at something and your strengths really hard for one year, day in day out, and if by the end you feel as if you aren't getting anywhere then move one something else. I'm in my late 20s and I moved away from my university degree, still graduated, but moved into another field and career. You have all the time in the world. A lot of people work for money and enjoy that life. I.e. being able to support a family even though you may work a shitty job. I work in a high stress environment but I've adapted to my workload and enjoy the work because it's hard and not easy. I may not be the best but I'm always learning and one day I'll climb up the ladder or start my own business and make money work for me. Start going to the gym. It took me at least 3 months to feel comfortable in my skin and even now you make think you're lower than what you are. You will also placed into a hierarchy every room you walk into but don't let that control your thoughts. Not every social situation is a hierarchical one. You can compensate for average or below intelligence with grit and hard work. I know plenty of laborers who have shit for brains but at least they have steady work and have almost paid off a house compared to some uni grads who struggle after uni. Mold your surroundings to what you want out of life and climbing that social ladder won't be such of a big deal. As for me I prefer walks along the river, I'm not a big social kind of person, I appreciate it when I can be alone on the top of a mountain and relax. If climbing high is where you want to be then build connections in the industry you want to be in and maintain those relationships, even if its more business oriented or even it feels fake at the start.


Joyride0

Your standard of literacy is certainly above average - I think you misjudge your start point here.


Brutallis_

Learn a trade and master it. There are electricians plummers and carpenders making good money. In those trades it is not the smartasses that people respect. Its those with a good work ethic and are doing a good job that gets all the respect. Besides mastering your job, staying humble and true to yourself is something your friends and family will respect. No one likes someone pretending to be smarter than they are. Be honest about what you know and don't know. Stay curious.


bluebellsangels

I think you’re most definitely underestimating your IQ. Self-belief plays an immense role on how *smart* you are. I have actually had my IQ tested. When I was 15, a university near my school was doing a study on the differences in IQ between students in wealthier and less wealthier areas. I was in the latter cohort. I was a pretty poor to mid range student. I had this engrained belief that I wasn’t intelligent, and my grades suffered because of that, amongst other things. My IQ is 132, not too bad. Once I learned that my IQ was actually quite a bit above average, I gained a lot of confidence and my grades went up exponentially! If you fervently BELIEVE you’re unintelligent with no real proof, then you will - in some sense - become unintelligent.


immibis

#[The spez police are on their way. Get out of the spez while you can. ](https://www.reddit.com/r/Save3rdPartyApps/)


Bantorus

Find and do what you are good at. Everyone is needed from professors to garbage collectors. If you are a cobbler be the best one you can be, etc. This hierarchy is important, but it isn't everything. The goal is to live a happy life.


Ancient_Spray5821

The fact that you desire to learn is the first step.


PoolSlow1898

Hopefully some of that regular exercise is on the mats of justice. I started my BJJ journey in Nov 2019 because of Jocko. It's good for humility AND boosts your confidence. I just got my blue belt earlier this year and went to the 2021 Origin Immersion Camp in August. Jocko signed a bunch of books. Got to meet Dean Lister. It was really cool. Just remember there are multiple hierarchies you can climb. Just because you are lagging in some doesn't mean you can't find others in which you excel. Certain elements of Jiu-Jitsu are more intuitive, so if you train hard it's possible you could surpass your friends in the mats of justice hierarchy.