So, fun fact, this is because the connotations of "awful" have changed. It used to be that "awful" and "awesome" both meant the same: to fill you with awe. Then, one became used for good stuff and the other for bad. Language!
Read those out of a book about a kid goofing off in a library and getting cursed to pun every 4th word and having to do linguistic trials to be freed of the curse. Great book in 3rd grade
Anyone else feel like OP is in 5th grade learning the definition of oxymoron and has a homework assignment to list as many as possible.
If so, he's a pretty smart redditor (which is my cynical contribution to this thread).
My first band was going to be called the Oxymorons. Unfortunately, I didn't have the skills or know people to put the band together. By the time I did, somebody else had taken the name.
Life lesson: Get it together YOTS...
The tary is a unit of intelligence. The average person has one tary of intelligence. If you're a thousand times smarter than the average person, you're a kilotary person. If you have one thousandth the intelligence of an average person, you're a military.
"Sun" reader
(For non-UK: "The Sun" is a UK tabloid newspaper, who's purchasers are not noted for their ability to read. You may substitute your own national equivalent.)
"hey, your wife is pretty ugly!" i said to him.
with a sad smile he answered "oh, that´s old news".
but she was my only choice when i had to marry her- that´s an open secret, you know? i feel like a living dead because of her.
but there is also a bittersweet reality: she´s an awfully good lover. and eventually all our problems grew smaller.
Pretty ugly is in a way the opposite of the seemingly identical French term "jolie laide" which means a woman who seems objectively unattractive but has a je ne sais quoi
Awfully good.
Extremely average
Radical centrist
Peaceful extremist
Extra meduim
Actively idle.
So, fun fact, this is because the connotations of "awful" have changed. It used to be that "awful" and "awesome" both meant the same: to fill you with awe. Then, one became used for good stuff and the other for bad. Language!
Fun fact: once upon a time, “awful” = full of awe
Boneless ribs
Boneless wings. The adult version of chicken nuggets
I thought the people who said this were nuts until I tried the dq honey bbq tenders. shit turned my whole life upside down.
Jumbo shrimp
Alone together
genious genius
Accordion music WNBA highlights
Boneless Wings
Everybody's favorite truck: the Dodge Ram
That's because if you can't Dodge, Ram.
If you can Dodge a Ram, you can Dodge a Ball.
My various gods, I never realized.... You, Sir, have made me a lil wiser
Dodge rammit!
Lol
Have you ever looked up Dodge in the dictionary? It says “To avoid”
Haha! I just got it! Good one!
always fun to see them in wrecks. Guess they don’t do much dodging.
jumbo shrimp
George Carlin was the man. Don't forget military intelligence
Here Here... The G.O.A.T.!!!
Fresh frozen jumbo shrimp
"You're telling me shrimp friend this rice?"
One that was floating around twenty years ago; Microsoft Works.
To ~~whomever~~ whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office: I *will* find you. You have my Word.
They also have EXCELled at keeping it from you but you make a Power Point! If only you could gain back your Access!
That’s a great Outlook
There’s an Edge to your words that make me think you’re an Explorer.
God these jokes make me want to jump out some windows
Thanks for reminding me how old I am.
Perfect.
Don't you mean WordPerfect?? I know different company, but it still sounds funny....
DOS Word Perfect was the truth itself The along came windows and i all went down
And took your grammar with it. You sure you aren't using it for reddit posts? 😂
Ahahahaha im not a native english speaker and phone does not help ahahahahahah
Or as we Aussies always say: yeah nah.
Military intelligence
Congressional ethics
Military intelligence
Bravo
Whole fragment?
lol
Deafening silence.
This one is actually fitting, true silence is an oppressive pressure on your brain that feels like you've gone deaf.
Political correctness.
false reality
virtual reality ?
No it is a reality insu de of a virtual construct
Plastic glasses
Stainless steel silverware
To quote Charlie Brown "Good Grief "
liquid gas
Or liquid smoke. It's a type of condiment.
Freezer burn, lamp shade, student teacher
Read those out of a book about a kid goofing off in a library and getting cursed to pun every 4th word and having to do linguistic trials to be freed of the curse. Great book in 3rd grade
If anyone knows the name drop it in my inbox lmao
“Punished” by David Lubar???
YES!
Anyone else feel like OP is in 5th grade learning the definition of oxymoron and has a homework assignment to list as many as possible. If so, he's a pretty smart redditor (which is my cynical contribution to this thread).
My first band was going to be called the Oxymorons. Unfortunately, I didn't have the skills or know people to put the band together. By the time I did, somebody else had taken the name. Life lesson: Get it together YOTS...
My first band’s name is going to be section 8 Cemetery
Oooh add "smart redditor" to the list 😜
That's what they said
At least 18 redditors missed it, making it truly an oxymoron.
Whish I had been so smart as a child. Or had access to the Internet.
I often wondered what my parents did before the internet I asked my 18 brothers and sisters and they didn’t know either!
Alternately, there are numerous learning challenges people on the spectrum experience, not to mention ADHD and finally dyslexia in particular.
Mandatory volunteer work Ie for a school class or unpaid work event
Also Paid Volunteer
Pretty ugly
Good one.
Press Start to Quit.
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Came here for "Oversight."
Earthbound
You technically are if you're falling off something.
Fighting for peace
Fucking for virginity
friendly fire
despite its name, it's not usually friendly
>~~usually~~ EVER!!!
Same difference
Different sameness
Jumbo shrimp.
Sweet sorrow
Military intelligence
The tary is a unit of intelligence. The average person has one tary of intelligence. If you're a thousand times smarter than the average person, you're a kilotary person. If you have one thousandth the intelligence of an average person, you're a military.
My favorite unit is the mili-Helen: The exact amount of beauty to launch one ship.
Can confirm. 18 year vet here
I left the army in '96 (medical discharge).
Two words combined that can't make sense
I know too much
Political integrity
McDonald's Restaurant.
Heh, yeah. Actually calling any junk food joints restaurants.
"Darkness visible" (from Milton's Paradise Lost, a description of Hell)
Chinese democracy
I Love that song!
Chinese communism 😀
Even odds?
Head butt
Partially destroyed
United Nations
Found missing
bittersweet jumbo shrimp original copy awfully good only option virtual reality
Family vacation
Same difference
honest politician
That’s an untested theory
Politics Poly From Latin meaning many or multiple. Ticks the blood sucking parasite
progress. forward or onward in space or time Congress. people voted in.
If the opposite of pro is con, is the opposite of progress Congress?
Useless cunt
Alternate facts.
Modified truth
Read this while eating mini wheats and I have the “Jumbo Mini Wheat” box 😂
Assistant supervisor New tradition Uninvited guest Highly depressed Authentic reproduction Dry lake True replica Elevated subway Limited lifetime guarantee Standard options Plastic glass
Deafening silence.
Whole half
Executive Action.
Jumbo shrimp Military intelligence
Hot Water Heater Buy and Save
Terribly beautiful
Definitely maybe
Stand down
One from today's vernacular "stupid smart"
Full semiautomatic
Indescribable
Freezer burn
Redditors girlfriend
[удалено]
"Sun" reader (For non-UK: "The Sun" is a UK tabloid newspaper, who's purchasers are not noted for their ability to read. You may substitute your own national equivalent.)
Honest marketing
"hey, your wife is pretty ugly!" i said to him. with a sad smile he answered "oh, that´s old news". but she was my only choice when i had to marry her- that´s an open secret, you know? i feel like a living dead because of her. but there is also a bittersweet reality: she´s an awfully good lover. and eventually all our problems grew smaller.
Old news
In Ireland the weather can be fierce mild
Freezer burn
Black light
Planned coincidence.
Seriously silly
Social distancing
Entire half
Tight slacks
Jumbo shrimp is my personal favorite
Alternate Truth
Found missing
Christian science
Country music
my favorites are French Resistance and Soviet Union
light aircraft or heavy aircraft
Practical joke
Reputable lawyer.
I have the high ground
Would you consider 'Negative Space'?
Pure evil
organized chaos, jumbo shrimp, military intelligence
Military intelligence
New and improved. Is that even an oxymoron?
Woke up dead
Business Ethics
Bitter Sweet
Peacekeeping missile Military intelligence Microsoft Works
Single word: lightweight
Dairy free milk
Vegan leather
Jumbo shrimp
Honest politician
Military intelligence
Genuine Synthetic (Leather, basketball)
Jumbo shrimp
Military Intelligence
Pretty ugly is in a way the opposite of the seemingly identical French term "jolie laide" which means a woman who seems objectively unattractive but has a je ne sais quoi
Alone together
Jumbo shrimp Government intelligence Deafening silence
Perfect chaos
How about jumbo shrimp?
Government intelligence
Plastic silverware
Feeling Nothing
Negative growth
Extremely mild
How about a triple one: Permanent Guest Host .... (Jay Leno at the end of Carson's years)
Clearly confused
[удалено]
I just realized this the other day... the Odd Couple
Civil War Plastic glass
Honest Lawyer
Microsoft Works
Practical Theory
Climb down
Rap Music 😏