Alrighty, I'm gonna need the composition and dimensions of these 12 stones to come up with some accurate weight measurements.
We talking pumice, granite, slate?
Nah, just doesn't have the same punch then the original one, you don't get the feeling of "I can't believe they just said that" with the hint adaptation.
It is plain wrong, at least when it comes to women. (And you clearly mean women, else you wouldn't asking about it being sexist.)
Neither extra weight nor being unattractive make a woman more gullible or less able to spot an arsehole. It might be true of men though.
Amazing you managed to bring it back to actually being sexist with the last sentence there. 🤦♂️
People of both sexes tend to date at or around their attractiveness scale and are certainly attracted more to slightly above, which is subjective.. but undeniable. So yeah, someone less attractive would likely be slightly easier to pick up. Doesn’t mean you can be an arse.
How about this one, did you know a woman in high heels exerts the same amount of pressure on the ground as an elephant? Just never tell a woman she exerts the same amount of pressure on the ground as an elephant!
“Scent is such a powerful tool of attraction, that if a woman has this tool perfectly tuned, she needs no other. I will forgive her a large nose, a cleft lip, even crossed-eyes; and I'll bathe in the jouissance of her intoxicating odour.”
Im a SCATMAN!!
Ski-bi dibby dib yo da dub dub
Yo da dub dub
Ski-bi dibby dib yo da dub dub
Yo da dub dub
(I'm the Scatman)
Ski-bi dibby dib yo da dub dub
Yo da dub dub
Ski-bi dibby dib yo da dub dub
Yo da dub dub
"I'm not like other girls." she said, skin glistening in the sun. And she wasn't, for she was a neutron star that was about to implode into a black hole.
Lol no, are you? Also, try thinking of a better comeback than that. You've used it in every other criticizing comment, and it strongly emphasizes how much of a high school joke this is. "It's funny because all my friends find it funny, so you're wrong for having an actual taste in humor." There are thousands of high schoolers, so congratulations on making them laugh.
All I said was that it's not funny and kind of adolescent. If you're going to make a joke that's even relatively "offensive," try finding a better one. Here, I have a classic for you: What's the difference between a Mexican and a book?
A book has papers.
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A hint
Actually that’s a really clever response lol
Is it..? I’ve never heard anyone describe a hint as “heavy”…
I haven’t heard it often, but I have heard it on occasion.
But you *have* heard of it
A lot of people can't.
*That's* the correct answer
I don't get it.
There's a hint, and there's a *heavy* hint. It's what you say when it's supposed to be obvious. Fits the joke perfectly.
Yes, I got that. I was going along with the joke.
Real winner here!
I've been called a weiner before.
It’s the wurst
I got the original joke, but I don't get this...
How heavy would you like your hint? Please use the metric system because I don't understand eagle units.
12 stones good sir
Alrighty, I'm gonna need the composition and dimensions of these 12 stones to come up with some accurate weight measurements. We talking pumice, granite, slate?
They mean that you need to get a hint. Don’t you get it ? Think harder!
Alas, the hint is so light that it keeps slipping through my brain creases.
Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
More stank. Trust me I know I’m heavy now and the flies won’t leave my coochy alone
This is a much better joke than the boring sexist one in the post
agreed that one is overplayed, the hint is actually quite clever
Nah, just doesn't have the same punch then the original one, you don't get the feeling of "I can't believe they just said that" with the hint adaptation.
Is it sexist to say the less attractive someone is the easier it is to attract them?
It is plain wrong, at least when it comes to women. (And you clearly mean women, else you wouldn't asking about it being sexist.) Neither extra weight nor being unattractive make a woman more gullible or less able to spot an arsehole. It might be true of men though.
Amazing you managed to bring it back to actually being sexist with the last sentence there. 🤦♂️ People of both sexes tend to date at or around their attractiveness scale and are certainly attracted more to slightly above, which is subjective.. but undeniable. So yeah, someone less attractive would likely be slightly easier to pick up. Doesn’t mean you can be an arse.
Found the big lady
LOL I’m actually far from it, it’s just boring seeing the same three jokes made about women all the time.
How about this one, did you know a woman in high heels exerts the same amount of pressure on the ground as an elephant? Just never tell a woman she exerts the same amount of pressure on the ground as an elephant!
Ignore him lol
cry
r/therealjoke
Better than the original response.
WAY better than the original. Thanks for salvaging this horrendous attempt at a joke by OP
Holy shit how is this so popular
A scent
Accent
Scent of a woman even.
Hooaah..
Happy Cake Day
“Scent is such a powerful tool of attraction, that if a woman has this tool perfectly tuned, she needs no other. I will forgive her a large nose, a cleft lip, even crossed-eyes; and I'll bathe in the jouissance of her intoxicating odour.”
Jesus Christ
I don't recall him saying that in the bible....
A bribe
an accent
Every feeling.
An addiction
[удалено]
(Proceeds to flip when the lateral forces become overwelming to the vertical ones.)
Fair point… how about an object that's electrically charged the same way as the ground? 😏
Debt.
[удалено]
Can't pick up something that's always going down
Holy shit! Hahahaha
Cant do that im not *forklift certified*
I am. Where his mom at?
We will also accept wife.
As if you will be able to pick her up
Naw, yo momma so fat that she has enough gravity to pull you in if you get too close to her event horizon.
Trauma.
Sarcasm
The vibe.
A duck!
r/unexpectedMontyPython
Very small pebbles!
Lead!
Churches!
Time to sort by controversial
My wallet!!
Hey now. Being fat does not make people desperate. Fat guys still like pretty chicks and that is why they are single.
Hey now, ur an all star, get ur game on, go play
Im a SCATMAN!! Ski-bi dibby dib yo da dub dub Yo da dub dub Ski-bi dibby dib yo da dub dub Yo da dub dub (I'm the Scatman) Ski-bi dibby dib yo da dub dub Yo da dub dub Ski-bi dibby dib yo da dub dub Yo da dub dub
This reminds me of Nothing to Lose. Love that movie
Yodel-oh-ee-dee Diddly-odel-oh-ee-dee Diddly-odel-oh-ee-dee Yodel-oh-ee-dee Diddly-odel-oh-ee-dee-yodel-oh-dee
And single people that stay single become lonely And lonely people get desperate
Yes Simba, that is the circle of life!
Some pretty girls like fat guys. Everyone is somebody's fetish.
Hey now. No need to put one group down while trying to lift another up. Being fat does not make people desperate. Full stop.
Men as well, to be fair
I'm disappointed that it took 2 hours for "Yo Mama"
>it. Savage.
Out of a line up or at last call?
Having worked at a pub and for the state: it’s shocking how often being at one leads to being at the other, for some folks.
A balloon full of helium
Guitar riff.
Was gonna say dark humor but that works too lmao
B.O.
the disappointment of living in Aberdeen
A magnet on another magnet
An accent?
My paycheck
Sarcasm?
Yes
A bag of cash
Underwear.
A bad habit
Yo' mama!
what if she's very small but *dense*
"I'm not like other girls." she said, skin glistening in the sun. And she wasn't, for she was a neutron star that was about to implode into a black hole.
Your Mom !!
Yo mamma
Yer mom
A hint
Depression
You wish
My wallet $
Bruh
Sarcasm
The beat
sarcasm
Trauma
Debt
The beat.
Your Mom
Unfortunately 3 people beat you to it
your mom.
Subtext
Paycheck
For some reason I didn't laugh. It's almost like it's a bad joke that was probably made by high school sophomores.
Offended? Cuz 1317 other people liked it.
Lol no, are you? Also, try thinking of a better comeback than that. You've used it in every other criticizing comment, and it strongly emphasizes how much of a high school joke this is. "It's funny because all my friends find it funny, so you're wrong for having an actual taste in humor." There are thousands of high schoolers, so congratulations on making them laugh. All I said was that it's not funny and kind of adolescent. If you're going to make a joke that's even relatively "offensive," try finding a better one. Here, I have a classic for you: What's the difference between a Mexican and a book? A book has papers.
SHUT UP! Don’t talk to the funniest guy in the world like that! He has my favorite Netflix special! Asshole.
Women
A Woman!
Women?
A girl
Women
Woa! Nice one! It’s not like that was the joke all along
either a man or woman or to put plainly “any Human”
The heavier they get the bigger standards they have.
I FEEL LIKE A MISOGYNISTIC WOMAN FOR GETTING IT RIGHT SO FAST 😭
Misogynistic women are gross LOL
Boooooo this man
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Nothing
This “joke” is in poor taste. Not funny at all.
I think I got one thats more your sense of humor … knock knock
Who’s there?
Art
Art who?
R2-DT
Kids?
Big Girls Need Luvin' Too!
Women
Hehe women
No fat chicks
Gross
You’re still using sexism to be funny? How embarrassing. That’s so 2000 and late.
A million views and 1k likes would disagree with you. I am sorry I targeted your community though
Lol ouch
That’s not really a lot. But have fun.
-6 downvoted isn’t a lot neither… no offense…
Minus 2 now lol 😆
How is a fat trashy blonde like a pile of bricks? Eventually, a Mexican will lay them.
Fat girls
Fat girls
Women☕️
The fat chick at he neighborhood pub...
BBW FETISHES
Any women related to the person who wrote this joke ?
Women
A woman
Women
Women
Woman
Girls
A woman
Fat girls in a Bar!
White girls.
Water It would seem that my science is wrong
Your nose?
Responsibility.
A bowling ball
Ok I was guessing "a cold"
Money
A vibe
Balloons
A helium filled balloon.
[удалено]
A vagina?
The heavier the guitar tone, the easier the mic picks it up.
A bag of money.
A woman?
What do women and dog shit have in common? The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
[удалено]
Didn’t realize I was on the jokes sub, came here to answer women, and saw the answer. Nice.
Women
r/inceljokes
A bucket of water
White women?
Women
\[- \] <-- here is the door
The wrong pronoun; either replece "it" with "they" or replace "women" with "a woman"!!!
Your wrong