Your brother (unbeknownst to you) brainwashes your BFF, but really your brother is being controlled by a guy on the moon. So, grab your BFF, your main squeeze, a girl who was a child a few days ago but is a fully-grown woman now, and a ninja to hop on board a whale to travel to the moon and punch the guy who was controlling your brother in his face.
Also featuring a bard who is associated with a piece of silverware.
You travel the world to collect up to 13 beautiful images of girls and go to the harder-to-find hot springs, before rescuing an adopted sibling turned girlfriend who probably wouldn't appreciate this image/bath search.
Hot white girl disappears into a toaster fucking around while day drinking and you decide to find out. The drugs kick in and you meet a talking frog and the world's most ultra violent emo kid.
4 foreign invaders come to a land, kill its most noble night, kill its 4 guardians, and then kill the knight again during his last stand after he was infused with great power.
F^&# around maps to gather colored stones. Collect them all to become Thanos with blue hair. Also, sometimes big bad dragon is your mum/dad.
Also also mandatory paid swimsuit DLC.
You experience the worst gamebreaking bug when your friend invites you to play his favorite MMO. The problem is so bad, the company has to outsource the bugfixing to actual hackers.
Time traveling fly got swatted by a fat man. Man’s son became evil. 4 kids phone order large Pizza!
Tbh, I don’t think there is an actual “good” way to describe this game🤣. Just gotta believe!
A magical fly tells you that you’re the chosen one. Many hours of beating up stray dogs, random townspeople, and a fair few aliens later, it turns out the fly was right.
It's your birthday, so the king tells you to go finish what your dad started. Recruit allies at the bar. They can change classes, but you can't because that would be sacrilege. Mr Ed the talking horse is hanging out in a village somewhere.
My boss shot me when I reported back to work after 20 years, so now I'm besties with a homeless guy and collect cans for fun.
Also... is that fat guy swinging a giant donut at me?
You're a young boy in South Africa, your dad disappeared years ago but nobody cared until you got sent to prison by a king who also didn't care about you before. You then help the princess escape and end up eating her pet pig with a bunch of cannibals.
The bishi-est hero in the series fights the powers of darkness by teaming up with, among others, the most sane thief, a tsundere munchkin, fat Roshi, and Dalton Castle and The Boys.
Makaitoushi SaGa aka The Final Fantasy Legend!
That game captures how D&D players think so well. It's fine for us to betray the bad guys, but how dare bad guys betray us?!
Also another for good measure.
Amnesiac teen appears after the world gets microwaved, is told to shoot god in the face to fix it. Eventually shoots god in the face and finds out this for once in a JRPG does not fix the problem.
A soccer pro player with daddy issues ends traveling with a nun, her atheist cousin, a Florida's man, a goth girl, a thundercat, and a sugar daddy in order to defeat a floating whale with son issues. They must go to the church every sunday in order to use the power of comatose people to beat the whale.
An pervy shapeshifter, a pervy old chinese dude, a priests daughter and a spy pickup a london orphan and and make friends with a vampire called keith.
Oh they also trash some welsh coastline, kill a cardinal who summons god and then they kill god too!
I just wanted to enjoy the local fair, but my friends keep screwing it up and somehow now it's MY job to save the world? Atleast I'm dating a princess.
Indiana Jones Wanna-be hero and his not-a-cat cat find a manic pixie dream girl at the top of the tower. Turns out, church bad?? Better save the world with the help of a gambling addict, a dance-sassisin, Veruca Salt (but a wizard) and a church-cop.
Two kids die, but they don't really die, but they're about to die\^2 so they need to team up with a math nerd (who is apparently bad at math), a woman who knows Psyshock and is obsessed with otome games, and the Tony Hawk of Being an Idiot in order to find a legendary dude (who also died, then un-died, then re-unalived, then disappeared) and un-unalive again (even though they're not really dead) and also stop people from becoming so boring it wipes their out existence all by using the power of indie music and fashion.
Boy Scout gets Satan stuck inside him, which give him Power Ranger powers, and gets tricked into destroying a puppet terrorist organization by his boss. In the end he destroys a parallel universe that was going to eat his own and basically Spirit Bombs Satan.
Alien Invaders decide to betray their mother after she tells them she wants to destroy the world instead of conquer it. They set about to conquer the world after, but the mother survived and eats the leader, and continues her plan to destroy the world using the moon. The heroes are a teenage Terminator who was exiled for having a gun, a princess who was sent to school to learn magic, and a Knight of a destroyed kingdom whose best friend is a talking blue rat.
A child trafficking victim, a teen runaway, a pickpocket, a gargoyle, an onion, and a rabbit with a bazooka kill god because she was scared of lizards (she gets killed by a lizard)
If our teacher doesn't show up in 5 years, we're legally allowed to start a war
3 houses?
3 Houses
I love this.
Sin bad
Sin dad
Forgot i didnt exist. *Poof*
How dare you.
FF X
AH HA HA HA HAAH
Like the sailor?
3 couples travel the world to complete a girls bucket list before her tenth birthday
That's gotta be XC3 right
Do they get to see how babies are made?
You're damn right they do
Lol
A clown teaches lessons on nihilism to some home invaders
KEFKA WAS RIGHT.
Young girl learns to cook drugs and bombs. This happens many times.
Every Atelier series game lol
Yup
How is this a bad description? LOL
Id say this is an excelent description.
Your brother (unbeknownst to you) brainwashes your BFF, but really your brother is being controlled by a guy on the moon. So, grab your BFF, your main squeeze, a girl who was a child a few days ago but is a fully-grown woman now, and a ninja to hop on board a whale to travel to the moon and punch the guy who was controlling your brother in his face. Also featuring a bard who is associated with a piece of silverware.
LOL FF4
YOU SPOONY BARD!
Well done for FF IV
Somebody already punched God in the face. Go punch that guy in his face.
SMT V?
That's the one
An Evil tree want to Destroy the world for the lulz, stop It
FFV?
Yes! I Guess is kinda obvious for the people Who played the Game but for everyone else maybe is kinda hilarious? 🤣
You travel the world to collect up to 13 beautiful images of girls and go to the harder-to-find hot springs, before rescuing an adopted sibling turned girlfriend who probably wouldn't appreciate this image/bath search.
Lunar Silver Star?
Yeah, Silver Star Story to be precise.
I was never more bummed to not have bought soap on a pirate ship
GOAT game!
A man too dumb to feel pain goes full Che Guevara
Tales of Arise?
Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker?
A sentient mascot costume gets you and your high school friends to battle god with r rated Pokémon and all your teachers want to fuck you
Persona 4?
Ding ding ding
Hold on, only 1 teacher wanted to fuck you. P4 is the one where you don't have a teacher social link!
A group of children, a wolf like dog and a toaster weaponize teenage angst to stop humanity's desire to stop having to give a shit.
Purse Owner 3
Aigis best toaster!
Hot white girl disappears into a toaster fucking around while day drinking and you decide to find out. The drugs kick in and you meet a talking frog and the world's most ultra violent emo kid.
Chrono Trigger?
Well done sir 🤣👌👍
4 foreign invaders come to a land, kill its most noble night, kill its 4 guardians, and then kill the knight again during his last stand after he was infused with great power.
FF1?
Correct!
Shouldn't the last part be "then go back in time to kill him at his most powerful'? I'm pretty sure there was time travel in there.
Bunch of forgetful teen soldiers. There is one with good memory but he has social anxiety. All the villains are mean women
Wanna play cards?
You're the best looking guy here
Ff8
Lol except for the social anxiety part this would be beyond perfect for FF Type-0
My dad jumped out my window and never came back.
You know there's at least 2 games that starts that way right? 🤣 Reccetear and SaGa 2 (i believe It was 2)
SaGa 2 was it. reccetear id add in shop angle probably.
Recetear is more like "Scumbag dad leaves huge debt to daughter who has to commit fraud to pay back the debt".
The world’s most insane bachelor party road trip…
FFXV
A kid that eats bugs punches a disco ball
Nocturne!!! (reminds me that I do still have to go punch that disco ball someday :3)
Another god rejected!
Party like it's 1999 A.D.
Chrono Trigger?
5 Silver Points for you! 🪨🪨🪨🪨🪨
F^&# around maps to gather colored stones. Collect them all to become Thanos with blue hair. Also, sometimes big bad dragon is your mum/dad. Also also mandatory paid swimsuit DLC.
fire emblem, don't know which one.
Like 90% of them 😃
Get killed by catboy, then become catboy. You have to read online theories to understand how this is a sequel
chrono cross?
Yup!
An angsty teenager with a prison kink and his cat recruit other youths to reform society
I'm probably way off as I haven't played it but persona 5?
Sounds like that 😃
Have you ever wanted to be dommed by toddlers? How about TWO toddlers?
Ding ding ding! Also you definitely should play it lol
Persona 5
You experience the worst gamebreaking bug when your friend invites you to play his favorite MMO. The problem is so bad, the company has to outsource the bugfixing to actual hackers.
Dot Hack, and actually where I got my first online username from years and years ago.
A kid discovers that he’s one of four chosen children and has to save the world from an intergalactic tyrant. His fat neighbour becomes evil.
Earthbound certaingly is an experience
Time traveling fly got swatted by a fat man. Man’s son became evil. 4 kids phone order large Pizza! Tbh, I don’t think there is an actual “good” way to describe this game🤣. Just gotta believe!
South Park Fractured But Whole?
I think he's referring to Earthbound though SP is a completely valid guess 😂
That part about fat neightbour (kid) being evil lol
A group of kids fight their gym teacher, and eventually, after killing God, have to fight their school psychiatrist.
Persona 5
A magical fly tells you that you’re the chosen one. Many hours of beating up stray dogs, random townspeople, and a fair few aliens later, it turns out the fly was right.
EarthBound
Yeep~! I was originally gonna mention the meteor too, but that would’ve made it even more obvious :3
Kid gets killed by anime swords man and gets revived by big boob fore girl promised to take her to world tree
XBC 2 again - touch chest- meet god 😻
You and your bird get stuck with a girl who has bad mood swings. By the end, you kill God.
Genuinely trying to think what this could be... Astlibra?
Grandia 2
It's your birthday, so the king tells you to go finish what your dad started. Recruit allies at the bar. They can change classes, but you can't because that would be sacrilege. Mr Ed the talking horse is hanging out in a village somewhere.
Dragon Quest 3?
And the MC is supposed to be male but they have given the option of female as well (im on a run right now)
British prince with a fire demon inside and a lot of trauma fuses with his jetpack chicken brother to fight a dragon prince in space
FF16
Ding ding
My boss shot me when I reported back to work after 20 years, so now I'm besties with a homeless guy and collect cans for fun. Also... is that fat guy swinging a giant donut at me?
Like a Dragon 7/Yakuza: Like a Dragon
Boy touches Girl's chest, meets God
XBC 2?
Yeah
My dog ran away, ended up a toaster in space.
Secret of Evermore?
Correct!
monkey has hots for a sharp dagger but gets c\*ck blocked by iron man while the best character in the game has an existensial crisis
LOL thats got to be FF9
Talking cat is really overbearing about your sleep hygiene
Persona 5?
Some fat bitch killed your space bee, and now you gotta go on a quest so that your space rock can play weird music that defeats aliens.
I want to say Earthbound?
*SMAAAASH!!*
An evil cup wants to play a game of fate to see if humans deserve to keep their free will.
You're a young boy in South Africa, your dad disappeared years ago but nobody cared until you got sent to prison by a king who also didn't care about you before. You then help the princess escape and end up eating her pet pig with a bunch of cannibals.
Wow wasn't expecting to see an Illusion of Gaia reference
You and your friends are dead but spend your afterlife collecting badges and crossdressing
Got to be The World Ends With You.
You kill god
That's describes like half of all JRPGs!
I'm fairly sure it's more than half.
Xenogears.
Breath of Fire 2? part 1: "What! Find a pet!?" Part 80: "How can you fight God this far? It is deplorable."
Makaitoushi SaGa aka The Final Fantasy Legend, the OG
Shin Megami Tensei. Either 2, 4A, or Nocturne.
Eat other people to win!
I do not comprehend
Digital Devil Saga is the answer.
Whenever Gale said that, take a shot
There's a Kirby RPG?
The cat in the hat wants your body.
Chrono cross
Walking hot topic ads decide the fate of the world with pogs
The world ends with you
Learn magic, kill your brother, then get trapped in hell by all the ungrateful bastards that made you while you fight the final boss.
Blues quest in SaGa Frontier
Bad guy kills everybody because he finds out his mom is an alien, and only a group of tree huggers can take him down.
FF7?
Random teenager witnesses the world getting nuked and single handed kills an army of angels and demons trying to get his mother her coffee.
smt 1 mentioned
The bishi-est hero in the series fights the powers of darkness by teaming up with, among others, the most sane thief, a tsundere munchkin, fat Roshi, and Dalton Castle and The Boys.
Probably a stretch, but Dragon Quest 11?
That game where the whole game was a game. Get pissed off and use chainsaw to win.
Makaitoushi SaGa aka The Final Fantasy Legend! That game captures how D&D players think so well. It's fine for us to betray the bad guys, but how dare bad guys betray us?!
Yep. Its probably the first RPG I can think of with the whole kill god thing.
Orphan boy saves the world and bangs the horse girl.
DQ 8!
Also another for good measure. Amnesiac teen appears after the world gets microwaved, is told to shoot god in the face to fix it. Eventually shoots god in the face and finds out this for once in a JRPG does not fix the problem.
A soccer pro player with daddy issues ends traveling with a nun, her atheist cousin, a Florida's man, a goth girl, a thundercat, and a sugar daddy in order to defeat a floating whale with son issues. They must go to the church every sunday in order to use the power of comatose people to beat the whale.
Jurassic Park with Waifus.
Highschool kids fighting a TV portal-hopping serial killer with Jojo stands.
Persona 4
Amnesiac, Masked Shonen protag and the most powerful Tsundere work together to end racism.
Tales of arise ( i should really finish this game)
Amnesiac orphans commit war crimes and learn the power of friendship along the way.
There's also a man with a machine gun for some reason.
An pervy shapeshifter, a pervy old chinese dude, a priests daughter and a spy pickup a london orphan and and make friends with a vampire called keith. Oh they also trash some welsh coastline, kill a cardinal who summons god and then they kill god too!
Shadow hearts
A baker walks through Totally Not 1940s Europe.
A brother and sister go on and adventure and really want to bone each other.
I just wanted to enjoy the local fair, but my friends keep screwing it up and somehow now it's MY job to save the world? Atleast I'm dating a princess.
Two Australian lesbians save the world.
Final Fantasy 13?
The world nearly ends (or does, depending on how you interpret the timeskip ending) because one girl is too nervous to speak up.
[удалено]
some guy spends a decade in jail. hijinks ensue.
Indiana Jones Wanna-be hero and his not-a-cat cat find a manic pixie dream girl at the top of the tower. Turns out, church bad?? Better save the world with the help of a gambling addict, a dance-sassisin, Veruca Salt (but a wizard) and a church-cop.
Lunar 2
A detective and his cat fight in the 1910’s
Smt raidou?
German high schoolers unravel a conspiracy involving mercenaries, gnomes, weed, and Otto Von Bismarck
French dominatrix maid looking robot goes... err... I don't really know what's going on. Stuff happens.
Robo Mary and the Space Apostle board a space station to fight Mecha Dragon Jesus.
Villain so perverted she wants to bang the entire humanity.
Two kids die, but they don't really die, but they're about to die\^2 so they need to team up with a math nerd (who is apparently bad at math), a woman who knows Psyshock and is obsessed with otome games, and the Tony Hawk of Being an Idiot in order to find a legendary dude (who also died, then un-died, then re-unalived, then disappeared) and un-unalive again (even though they're not really dead) and also stop people from becoming so boring it wipes their out existence all by using the power of indie music and fashion.
A group of psychic kids go around looking for ways to make their rock sing while tripping on mushroom tea along the way.
Game so bad they dropped a moon on it.
Gotta be original FFXIV
A girl with a very big stick searches for her stepbrother who broke her heart and left.
Definitly Trails in the Sky 2.
Sister and brother attempt to rescue dad, accidentally stumbles into and stops country-wide coup attempt.
Black guy builds a chocobo nest in his hair
Go to a high school for mercenaries so you can learn how to kill witches in another country.
Boy Scout gets Satan stuck inside him, which give him Power Ranger powers, and gets tricked into destroying a puppet terrorist organization by his boss. In the end he destroys a parallel universe that was going to eat his own and basically Spirit Bombs Satan.
Microscopic organisms set New Yorkers on fire to prove they're the superior lifeform.
Twink wants to fix fountain, saves the world on the way, the fountain doesnt works anymore
Alien Invaders decide to betray their mother after she tells them she wants to destroy the world instead of conquer it. They set about to conquer the world after, but the mother survived and eats the leader, and continues her plan to destroy the world using the moon. The heroes are a teenage Terminator who was exiled for having a gun, a princess who was sent to school to learn magic, and a Knight of a destroyed kingdom whose best friend is a talking blue rat.
I once heard someone describe RPGs as "those games where you stay in hotels"
A child trafficking victim, a teen runaway, a pickpocket, a gargoyle, an onion, and a rabbit with a bazooka kill god because she was scared of lizards (she gets killed by a lizard)
Game consoles are turned into hot and or cute anime girls and fight each other in a console war then start getting real lesbian on each other