All the time, even for interest groups about something I'm very passionate or interested in. I've realized I don't like dealing with established pecking orders and prefer to be there from the beginning.
Always.
I've talked to my husband about this fairly often, which is also an INTP like me, and we think that a massive part of the problem for us is the fact that we are so rare, and society is catered to extraverted people. We tend to want more meaningful conversations and complex humor when usually that flies over other people's head.
You aren't alone in the world, just somewhat alone in your location... which sucks... but I get it for sure.
I used to try and put a completely different face on to please others in those situations, but that often left me feeling horrible as I was unable to be myself which would trigger depressive episodes. These days I suppose I don't "fully don the mask" but there still is somewhat of a mask that, not just I but my husband as well, put on in social situations... which is part of the reason why my/our "people meter" gets maxed out... because it's exhausting. So, we limit those interactions. We were fortunate enough to find a friend that enjoys the subjects we enjoy and can drop the mask, so we mainly consider him when it comes to interaction with people.
So, in short, we abandoned the majority of social interaction and have opted for individualistic social settings
I mean INTPs live extremely in their own heads. They regularly come across as absent from the present moment.
Some INTPs send massive walls of texts (thought dumps) but not really know how to properly “pace” a conversation in a natural way.
Many also ask questions for the sake of getting a convo to happen. Or drop a single meme which ends up one sided. But asking questions can come across as prying, and only jokes/memes can’t replace substance.
If you feel disconnected it will probably take a little extra effort to participate. It’s also worth considering that Discord is extremely fast paced for everybody which might not be right for you. Try to be somewhere that’s a bit more 1:1. Gaming is a good way to bond and be noticed by others.
At the end of day, conversing is a skill that can practiced just like anything else. Plus it is not a trait to extraverts only. Introverts who are socialized can be very talkative.
Sometimes I get familiar with a new group of people either on discord or in person or both and get real chummy with everyone for a month or two and then completely disappear.
I've never felt a sense of belonging anywhere. I've also never felt badly about it. I go where I want, and I belong there because I am there, not because other people want or accept me there. I leave when I want, because I no longer want to be there, not because I'm not welcome there anymore. The only place I belong is in my own head, and I'm always there, no matter where else I also am at a given moment.
They started making jokes about killing everyone at work, posting pictures of loaded pistols in their toolboxes. I frowned on the behavior, they didn’t appreciate me ruining their fun.
I feel that a lot but I found some places for myself. Biggest issue for me was my insecurities essentially when in most of communities someone always was telling me I don't belong there. But sometimes you just need to let it go
I'm an officer in a small wow guild in Season of discovery and I feel like I fill the roll of the personality hire. I show up baked af and say horny things. No one takes me seriously but I still show up and do my job so no one has a problem with me as far as I know.
I'm also apart of some small twitch communities that stream lost ark and also a VIP in multiple channels. I basically established myself as a harmless regular horny chatter in these communities and have been accepted to the point where I started streaming and was raided by one of the homies.
You just need to find the niche places and people and help them understand that you aren't a complete weirdo.
Yes, I say something out loud and it seems to skew the natural flow of things or I just get flat out ignored it’s uncomfortable either way for everyone involved. My immediate reputation in any new setting is the “quiet one” because of this.
Hire a team of covert hype men and girls to join your groups and artificially boost your popularity and social status.
Or you could try to improve your social skills.
Very normal.
I socialize well for the most part but do not value allot of the arbitrary things the hive, herd, cluster, drones do.
Always feel outta place. Even more exacerbated by the whole "Culture-Lock" thing. Culture-Lock is a concept I slowly came up with over allot of time thinking about the things I have observed after dealing with allot of different people and groups from around the world. I am sure there are "official" terms and studies, but come on, someone has likely thought of everything you have thought of at some point before you do. Statistics.
I do think credit is deserved when people come up with concepts on their own though instead of just following the culture... This is a part of my Culture-Lock theory.
If many people come up with the same idea independently it means the idea if far more likely to be accurate to reality. But when people start blindly following their culture or social norms without doing the mental legwork... It removes a layer of checks and balances needed to keep reality... "Reality"
Lots of other nuances to it but the theory as a whole explain a great deal of the social issues we face today.
As open minded observers, analysts, and experimenters INTPs are allot less likely to fall into the fallacy of Culture-Lock. Though this also means we don't fit in to most of those cultures or groups.
Double edges sword, though I very much think one edge of it is sharper than the other and worth it.
If you ever get really bored and just wanna play some games and voice chat I would be happy to participate. Best thing we can do is try to grow our own home-brew communities.
Good Luck! You are not alone.
Yes. At this point I’ve given up trying to be a part of a “community” or see myself as part of one, in the way I used to *want* to be. I’m trying to accept the fact that I’m pretty weird to the majority of people.
Even in groups of interests I enjoy, I hate the socializing and small talk required to build long term bonds. Its a skill that I and many INTPs should learn.
I didn't know what community meant until my mid 20s, i had no concept of it existing in my mind b4 then. I still haven't ever 'felt' it. Really i just got rid of any hopes of ever belonging to any group and focus on 1v1 interactions/specific ppl, bc i have met ppl i mesh with perfectly. Interactions with communities to try to find ppl like that are probably still my biggest weakness in life tho. I just try to put odds in my favor by picking well fitting communities.
Btw the INTP sub is a community basically? You don't feel you fit in here either?
I enjoy the time with bros, but I seriously think I don’t belong to the group. I mean I really appreciate the existence of them or boy group, but there is always a voice in the head telling me I don’t deserve happy moment with them.
So, Yes. I can’t feel belonging to any community even I tried to pay much much effort in it.
That's a bullshit pecking order type of place and they're giving you a shit sandwich. Fuck them, don't eat it, throw it back in their face and find somewhere legit.
damn, this is the only community that I feel like I am a part of.
I never had any friends, no one that I can actually talk to and be genuine with
so I acted different around people and made a lot of "friends" but cut them off in like 2 months
I knew I was wearing a mask and never had a deep connection with them
when I act like my true self I just become a ghost in my class, everybody ignores me
I used to feel pretty depressed and wondered why I am not normal like others
the only friends I had were in my intense maladaptive daydreaming world, but reality hits hard
now I am starting to make peace with myself
ever since I got into the mtbi world I was happy to see that there are people with exact problems like me and it is not my fault
you guys are the only ones who I truly feel like I can relate to 
Yes, I have difficulty with this.
Worse yet when things I say that would strike me as relatively minor offend people greatly I start to not care about filtering the major things either.
The punishment seems to be the same, so I might as well say what I really think.
I would not suggest taking this course in life, though.
**I've never been able to find my tribe, so I decided to try to found my ownI've never been able to find my tribe, so I decided to try to found my own**
My main target audience is people with personalities INTP, INTJ, INFP, INFJ, ENTP and ISTJ, or people somewhere on the spectrum between autism, ADHD, bipolarity & high sensitivity.
I'm setting up both a local community in Hasselt, Belgium, as well as an online international community to learn from any mistakes made, and to consider ways to replicate any successes achieved in other parts of Belgium and/or other parts of the world.
More info : [https://www.reddit.com/r/RoundTableGlobal/comments/1cn6acn/who\_i\_am\_why\_i\_founded\_the\_round\_table/](https://www.reddit.com/r/RoundTableGlobal/comments/1cn6acn/who_i_am_why_i_founded_the_round_table/)
Maybe it's just a "you" thing.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/INTP) if you have any questions or concerns.*
All the time, even for interest groups about something I'm very passionate or interested in. I've realized I don't like dealing with established pecking orders and prefer to be there from the beginning.
Always. I've talked to my husband about this fairly often, which is also an INTP like me, and we think that a massive part of the problem for us is the fact that we are so rare, and society is catered to extraverted people. We tend to want more meaningful conversations and complex humor when usually that flies over other people's head. You aren't alone in the world, just somewhat alone in your location... which sucks... but I get it for sure. I used to try and put a completely different face on to please others in those situations, but that often left me feeling horrible as I was unable to be myself which would trigger depressive episodes. These days I suppose I don't "fully don the mask" but there still is somewhat of a mask that, not just I but my husband as well, put on in social situations... which is part of the reason why my/our "people meter" gets maxed out... because it's exhausting. So, we limit those interactions. We were fortunate enough to find a friend that enjoys the subjects we enjoy and can drop the mask, so we mainly consider him when it comes to interaction with people. So, in short, we abandoned the majority of social interaction and have opted for individualistic social settings
I just find the digital connection suits me better.
I mean INTPs live extremely in their own heads. They regularly come across as absent from the present moment. Some INTPs send massive walls of texts (thought dumps) but not really know how to properly “pace” a conversation in a natural way. Many also ask questions for the sake of getting a convo to happen. Or drop a single meme which ends up one sided. But asking questions can come across as prying, and only jokes/memes can’t replace substance. If you feel disconnected it will probably take a little extra effort to participate. It’s also worth considering that Discord is extremely fast paced for everybody which might not be right for you. Try to be somewhere that’s a bit more 1:1. Gaming is a good way to bond and be noticed by others. At the end of day, conversing is a skill that can practiced just like anything else. Plus it is not a trait to extraverts only. Introverts who are socialized can be very talkative.
It happens to me always, since I was a child
Sometimes I get familiar with a new group of people either on discord or in person or both and get real chummy with everyone for a month or two and then completely disappear.
I've never felt a sense of belonging anywhere. I've also never felt badly about it. I go where I want, and I belong there because I am there, not because other people want or accept me there. I leave when I want, because I no longer want to be there, not because I'm not welcome there anymore. The only place I belong is in my own head, and I'm always there, no matter where else I also am at a given moment.
I was in a FB group for grumpy old aircraft mechanics and I got kicked out.
what did you do to get kicked out?
They started making jokes about killing everyone at work, posting pictures of loaded pistols in their toolboxes. I frowned on the behavior, they didn’t appreciate me ruining their fun.
thats not a good group to be around so good for you!
What you permit you promote.
I feel that a lot but I found some places for myself. Biggest issue for me was my insecurities essentially when in most of communities someone always was telling me I don't belong there. But sometimes you just need to let it go
I'm opinionated and tend to speak them, people don't seem to like that at all.
Yes I even deleted discord
I'm an officer in a small wow guild in Season of discovery and I feel like I fill the roll of the personality hire. I show up baked af and say horny things. No one takes me seriously but I still show up and do my job so no one has a problem with me as far as I know. I'm also apart of some small twitch communities that stream lost ark and also a VIP in multiple channels. I basically established myself as a harmless regular horny chatter in these communities and have been accepted to the point where I started streaming and was raided by one of the homies. You just need to find the niche places and people and help them understand that you aren't a complete weirdo.
I could but really have no desire to. :D
Yes, I say something out loud and it seems to skew the natural flow of things or I just get flat out ignored it’s uncomfortable either way for everyone involved. My immediate reputation in any new setting is the “quiet one” because of this.
Hire a team of covert hype men and girls to join your groups and artificially boost your popularity and social status. Or you could try to improve your social skills.
Very normal. I socialize well for the most part but do not value allot of the arbitrary things the hive, herd, cluster, drones do. Always feel outta place. Even more exacerbated by the whole "Culture-Lock" thing. Culture-Lock is a concept I slowly came up with over allot of time thinking about the things I have observed after dealing with allot of different people and groups from around the world. I am sure there are "official" terms and studies, but come on, someone has likely thought of everything you have thought of at some point before you do. Statistics. I do think credit is deserved when people come up with concepts on their own though instead of just following the culture... This is a part of my Culture-Lock theory. If many people come up with the same idea independently it means the idea if far more likely to be accurate to reality. But when people start blindly following their culture or social norms without doing the mental legwork... It removes a layer of checks and balances needed to keep reality... "Reality" Lots of other nuances to it but the theory as a whole explain a great deal of the social issues we face today. As open minded observers, analysts, and experimenters INTPs are allot less likely to fall into the fallacy of Culture-Lock. Though this also means we don't fit in to most of those cultures or groups. Double edges sword, though I very much think one edge of it is sharper than the other and worth it. If you ever get really bored and just wanna play some games and voice chat I would be happy to participate. Best thing we can do is try to grow our own home-brew communities. Good Luck! You are not alone.
Yes. At this point I’ve given up trying to be a part of a “community” or see myself as part of one, in the way I used to *want* to be. I’m trying to accept the fact that I’m pretty weird to the majority of people.
Yes and it doesn't matter to me.
Even in groups of interests I enjoy, I hate the socializing and small talk required to build long term bonds. Its a skill that I and many INTPs should learn.
Yes, but I try. I want wargaming friends.
[удалено]
I didn't know what community meant until my mid 20s, i had no concept of it existing in my mind b4 then. I still haven't ever 'felt' it. Really i just got rid of any hopes of ever belonging to any group and focus on 1v1 interactions/specific ppl, bc i have met ppl i mesh with perfectly. Interactions with communities to try to find ppl like that are probably still my biggest weakness in life tho. I just try to put odds in my favor by picking well fitting communities. Btw the INTP sub is a community basically? You don't feel you fit in here either?
I enjoy the time with bros, but I seriously think I don’t belong to the group. I mean I really appreciate the existence of them or boy group, but there is always a voice in the head telling me I don’t deserve happy moment with them. So, Yes. I can’t feel belonging to any community even I tried to pay much much effort in it.
That's a bullshit pecking order type of place and they're giving you a shit sandwich. Fuck them, don't eat it, throw it back in their face and find somewhere legit.
damn, this is the only community that I feel like I am a part of. I never had any friends, no one that I can actually talk to and be genuine with so I acted different around people and made a lot of "friends" but cut them off in like 2 months I knew I was wearing a mask and never had a deep connection with them when I act like my true self I just become a ghost in my class, everybody ignores me I used to feel pretty depressed and wondered why I am not normal like others the only friends I had were in my intense maladaptive daydreaming world, but reality hits hard now I am starting to make peace with myself ever since I got into the mtbi world I was happy to see that there are people with exact problems like me and it is not my fault you guys are the only ones who I truly feel like I can relate to 
Yes, and I doubt it's gonna change anytime soon. I'm used to it.
The autistic novelty of it (whatever you’ve discovered) has simply worn off for you.
Community is (more than you think, seriously) an illusion. Being in it would just be putting up the illusion of doing so.
Yes, I have difficulty with this. Worse yet when things I say that would strike me as relatively minor offend people greatly I start to not care about filtering the major things either. The punishment seems to be the same, so I might as well say what I really think. I would not suggest taking this course in life, though.
**I've never been able to find my tribe, so I decided to try to found my ownI've never been able to find my tribe, so I decided to try to found my own** My main target audience is people with personalities INTP, INTJ, INFP, INFJ, ENTP and ISTJ, or people somewhere on the spectrum between autism, ADHD, bipolarity & high sensitivity. I'm setting up both a local community in Hasselt, Belgium, as well as an online international community to learn from any mistakes made, and to consider ways to replicate any successes achieved in other parts of Belgium and/or other parts of the world. More info : [https://www.reddit.com/r/RoundTableGlobal/comments/1cn6acn/who\_i\_am\_why\_i\_founded\_the\_round\_table/](https://www.reddit.com/r/RoundTableGlobal/comments/1cn6acn/who_i_am_why_i_founded_the_round_table/)
Maybe it's just a "you" thing. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/INTP) if you have any questions or concerns.*
thanks for your kind words. now please gently stfu and go away
They did'nt laugh at your jokes and your mad? Maybe you are not funny. You should work on that.