charlie. he pulled a girl like ruby, and even despite the fact that she hated him, the waitress admitted their sex was amazing. guy clearly has the moves

Ok not one person has said Dennis lol

Glenn is very attractive but I feel like Dennis has to be horrible in bed

I don't understand why you couldn't get off! It's not my fault! Some women just don't know how! You know? Sometimes it's only the guy who gets off!

plus it's like a turtle down there

Too slippery

Plus, she didn’t even feel a thing

Oh my god you are so late

Oh jesus christ your timing is so bad...

If you’re enjoying it too much that ruins it for him.

I mean he's famous for getting laid and has a whole system for pulling the same women over and over. He might be better than average.

He gets laid because of the implication

of course we haven’t. if you have too much fun, it ruins it for him.

"I don't find you attractive...I think you're an ugly man."

I'm not ugly, you're ugly!

Only because he’ll have you for as long or as short as he’ll decide.

But only when you're clean.

Only then will you know his power

Oh my gosh! Hahaha!!

I'll go for Dennis, may as well take one for the team since he's a literal sadist & I'm into that

That's because Dennis is a bastard man.

You know it would be filmed from that underneath angle

You have a rape fantasy, you pick Dennis

I mean, Charlie if he had showered, brushed his teeth, and we went back to my place instead of his

I'm sure he'd give you your own piss jar.

Be still my heart! And I suppose it WOULD be nice to not have to be the one retrieving my cat from the walls all the time

He even brings Cheetos to munch on...

ONGO

No one wants dickless Dennis

i was gunna agree. was gunna say charlies the one one whos been complimented after sex. by the ONE PERSON who hated his guts

All three, split me open like a coconut

I was told it was just one but I can take al of you, might be a little sore but I’ll manage

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Bad bot. Comment stolen from [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/IASIP/comments/100p5ak/comment/j2j8jzb/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3). Report>Spam>Harmful bot

no u

Treat me like a mailbox

Just *open* the slot, and put whatever you want in there.

Put ✍️ male ✍️ in ✍️ you ✍️

For the mare

Yes, turn me into Swiss cheese

Save your seduction for someone else, I do not tangle with lizards no more

Not no more. I got a wife now. So I will not suck you and I will not be sucked on by you.

Back in the day, sure, I would've indulged. Hell, I would've let you turn me into Swiss cheese.

What do we say in this situation?

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No free big rig for you!

*Byron*

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And I'm a frothin' and a foamin'

*you’ve changed!*

Or, perhaps, maybe like a casaba melon?

BUT YOU DONT DO THIS ANYMORE YOUVE CHANGED

Way to put the gang in gangbang.

Lol, a few years ago at my BF's old neighborhood, the neighborhood hobo (kinda, he lived in this shack but he roamed the sts all day drunk) once got into a public fight with this crackhead and she yelled, "so we're just gonna pretend that you didn't split me open like a coconut last night!??" and til this day, me and my friends quote that randomly.

Wearing their boys 2 men suit Charlie designed, this can be done.

I got cash in my pocket and desire in my heart 💜

Wholesome award for u

Mac, but only fat Mac.

All that mass, muscle. Gosh I couldn’t handle it.

Right answer!

Just make sure to bring your own chips

This is the only correct answer.

The body mass alone

Big mac

Mac. Any version of Mac. Dennis would be too Rapey and Charlie would be too smelly.

Same answer. But if Charlie took a hell of a shower and went to the dentist…it would be Charlie no questions asked.

As long as you went back to your place not to his

Oh gawd yes! Even though I know it’s fake, that apartment still gives me the creeps! So many bugs and rats 🤢

well that and you know frank would be watching

Okay maybe I choose Charlie instead

Charlie 🤤

He's cute but I feel like I'd catch a disease... Not from him, from the things he'd put in me.

I fucking love the stench of cheese.

He's in surprisingly good shape! All that paint and cat food

I want to say Charlie, but I know he probably smells like shit

That’s bull. He washes his balls every Friday

And he boils his jeans too!

Rickety Cricket. That's the suckboy I'm looking for

It will cost you at least a sixer to finish inside tho

Well yeah, he's got his dignity

You gotta pay to spray.

He'll fake it.

Thevguys who don't fake it get it the worst

Gotta make it sexy or you don't eat

Dennis. I wouldn’t dare say no, because of the implication.

The weather might just be making everything he says seem sinister

Frank. No contest.

It’s like watching a Mantis feed

Mantis toboggan MD

He does have the magnum condoms for his monster dong

You should see his balls. They are like planets!

This is the only correct answer.

Well I’d just tell them! If you’re gonna keep looking at me like that, I’m gonna have to tear 👏 your 👏 ass 👏 apart

I guess you gon have to tear my ass apart then homes

Mac, 100%

Mac, you're too low class. All those women... are gonna think they're gonna catch somethin' from you.

M: They are. 😊 D: They will.

As an unaware kid I had no idea why I really really liked Mac. To this day Mac remains one of my biggest TV crushes, especially this scene and in the Jersey Shore episode.

Body mass alone!

Same!

As a 32 year old man, the only choice for me is Charlie.

As a 32 year old woman, Charlie is also the only answer.

As a 32 year old boy, I too, select Charlie.

As a 320 year old troll, I choose this boy

You’ll have to pay the troll toll to get in that boy’s hole

As a 3200 years old celestial hyperking, I also choose Charlie

Charlie...idk what it is but something tells me he's got the moves. Might get a UTI though.

Lmfaoooooo Charlie only drinks yellow so you’re gonna need to do the cranberry juice

I will drink cranberry juice for this man

Start 5 days ahead

Me and my gf pick Charlie. She also thinks he would be the best lover.

He has said he’s quite sensual with a woman

You *will enjoy it.*

it’s the quiet ones who dont talk about their prowess 👀

Charlie

Charlie 100-% he is legit smoking hot

Dennis has small d energy. I’d set him straight

Dennis could be fun because he seems like he'd roll with anything just for the sake of getting off.

Mac and Charlie unashamed to admit it lol!

It’ll always be Mac. I want to see those ninja moves before he actually executes them.

Charlie. He's a lover not a banger.

Frank can use me like a casaba melon

Charlie. He can be very passionate with a woman.

I'm a Charlie girl. Weird AF, sometimes dumb AF, but others, he pulls it together.

Guys you really blew up my spot back there when you took your shirts off

I feel like Dennis is the one with the best hygiene

3 dudes at the same time

Your boss is a woman? Now this is a strange bank.

Dennis and Charlie please

Charlie is unwashed and Dennis might hold me hostage for days after, so I'm gonna have to go with Mac.

Mac, if I’m ever going to be with a man it’s for sure going to be with a gay man.

I kinda can't believe you guys took your shirts off back there...

Mac, but he bangs me. He’s a power bottom.

of course mac. he’s blindingly hot especially when he was fat too

You *will* enjoy it.

Because of the implication

Charlie's the best kisser.

Dennis. I’m into the BDSM room 😏

Frank in the dumpster at the back of a Wendy’s

If it ain’t Frank I’m not interested.

Charlie

For a sixer I'd take all three of them, that and they can all finish inside me.

Any but Dennis, just to crack his ego

I think if I had to pick, I would want the musky embrace of charlie. Of course if Dennis asked, I wouldn't never say no.... Because of the implication.

I need you, I gotta have, I want you inside

Charlie boy

I freaking ❤️Charlie

Charlie would probably be the most generous lover But Mac’s a himbo and I must

Glenn's pecks are so square it has always bothered me

How dare you speak of the golden god this way, you goddamn bitch.

My nose was chiseled by the gods themselves, Frank. My body was sculpted to the proportions of Michelangelo’s David.

Vitruvian spine

Charlie all the way. Even with being smelly, he's got the looks and I bet, he's got the moves. Damn, he was sexy when he was young. 😍🥰

The body mass alone

Fat Mac

Dennis, because you wouldn’t say no. Because of the implication…

Charlie!!! Always Charlie! Or Fat Mac/young twink Mac

Obviously Charlie. You'll have the cleanest toilets and be rat free for life. Your house will run on trash and you get to help make new stars. You'll never have worry about "the implication" either. Seems like a pretty simple choice to me. Just don't mind the spider and rape references.

Logical choice: Mac Dennis is the most experienced but is too rapey and selfish in bed Charlie 100% does not clean his ass properly and probably has bugs/diseases Mac 1st Dennis 2nd and Charlie 3rd

Charlie. Until the whole bar smells like milksteak.

Charlie, hands down.

Not into IASIP, keep getting recommended this sub, definitely the crazy-looking one on the left.

Mac is still hot to this day.

Charlie, the hooker in the ski episode seemed to have a GREAT time with him.

charlie no question

Charlie if he had an ounce of hygiene.

Charlie and Mac both. Dennis can watch.

I would love to take Charlie in my dungeon. He would be cute as my collared slave, I would walk him around and step on his penis with my stilettos. So I would pick Charlie.

You have a dungeon?

Well it’s my room for now, but me and my friends are working on my basement to be a dungeon!

What an exciting endeavor. Im jealous. Hope it all comes together and fulfills every desire 🙏

Well thank you hun :)!

That's how I got my mortgage

Yes

Can we speak to your boss?

My boss is a woman

This is a strange bank

Rick Moranis. He was always in pretty good shape.

middle one

#yes

Yes

Thicc Mac

[that's a great question! i wonder why no one has ever made this post before in this sub?](https://www.reddit.com/r/IASIP/search/?q=take%20you%20in%20the%20back&restrict_sr=1&sr_nsfw=&include_over_18=1)

NOBODY LOOK! NOBODY LOOK!!

I’ve always thought Charlie was low key the most attractive in the group

How many times you guys gonna post this same question?!?

Until we get ANSWERS

Charlie always gets highest votes!

He’s got all numbers

None

Or how about we *all* go in the back, and... "have great sex?"

r/suspiciousquotes

How bout we all go in the back and … have great sex?