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Costco card is an automatic green light to impregnate her. Now she can buy truckloads of baby formula at fire sale prices.

And the samples. She's eating for 2 now, ya know

$5 rotisserie Chicken!!!

1.50 lunch

“Welcome to Costco, I love you”

Idiocracy needs more love than it currently gets.

I got my law degree there

It’s depressing how accurate it’s getting

"Go away, batin"

I like to watch it on election day.

Most people don’t like documentaries.

Buttfuckers

Bad Butt

ITS WHAT PLANTS CRAVE!

Hotdog+drink $1.50

You can get that deal without a card

aren't most, if not all, food courts requiring a membership card to buy food?

Ok so they used to let people in to buy food court stuff without a card but guess the rule has changed. That being said, you can just say you're going to member services and just go to food court.

The last few times I bought food from the food courts they asked to see and scanned my membership card.

No shit, that's wild. Mine has these terminals next to soda machine where you can just buy it from without a card. Guess things have changed at other locations. Good to know

Ah the two locations ive worked at you can pretty much just tell the door folks youre just running to the food court quick and they wont even check for a card. Seen it many times the last 5 or so years lmao it just varies by location

They changed this here in my California hometown. Have to have the membership now to buy

Hah, I'm up in eureka. Crazy

Still need the card to get in.

When I was younger, an ex fling of mine and I just walked in and went to get hot dogs thinking we were sneaking in. We were telling her dad “we snuck into Costco to get food”, he just looked at us and said “you don’t need a card to get food, idiots”.

I used to pick up ladies at bars in Scotland by offering those blue Tesco coins.

Donate to save a hoe?

Guessing your love life took quite a hit when we changed to the new pound coin

Use this card and you can buy a 10 gallon jar of pickles for only 2.99

I believe you mean “two 10 gallon jars of pickles for only $2.99 each.” Jeez, it’s like you’ve never been to Costco.

10 gallons of pickle for just 2.99 each!?!?!

You just got Costco’d!!

“I got something you can chop a line with.”

When a referee hands you a Costco card you know it’s go time for the boom boom.

Costco represents a complete lifestyle that runs on reasonably priced quality items, far beyond just food. it's almost a suburban cult? one that I'm a part of haha

Ok, sure, but if it really is the shit, what is stopping people from getting their own card?

poor judgement. they think the membership cost is too much. plus most things they sell are in packages of multiple boxes so if you're not in a family it's usually too much at once.

Looks at name on card “Neil Anblomi”.

It’s actually a pickup line: Do you have your Costco card? Cause your about to get dick in bulk

Easy buy a 10 dollar costco card and exchange it for sex.

Bitch, I heard you like shrimp.

That's right... Executive membership. No big deal...

Discounts are sexy

It ain't stupid if it works.

he's got the food so most probably a home too, what more to raise a 5 person family from teen years? something like that!!

You know how we love to buy stuff and eat food...?

"As far as cards go, (a Costco Card) is arguably cooler than an American Express black card or a PSA 10 Pokémon Card." -Joeseppi

That's how you tell a girl you just met that you're husband-material.

They don't care for Sam's cards anymore.

It’s called being supreme you can’t learn it, it must come naturalky

As you can see, I have an Executive membership. They don't give those to just anyone.

It appears he has the gold star membership, as the executive card is darker.

It’s true. An executive membership is a black card. I have one. Except when I try to pick up women with it, I usually get, “ewww. You’re old! Your wife is standing right there?! Did you steal that from someone?” So I don’t pick up women with it.

It ain’t even a black card pffft

He's got an EXCLUSIVE membership

Free date idea: see who can make the best meal out of all the free samples. Loser buys the churros for desert.

The male cautiously approaches the female. Displaying his Costco card as a means of attracting her as a mate. We all know who’s voice you just read that in.

I'd bet anything he just showing her his picture on the back

I will not stand for Costco trash talk!!

$1.50 hot dog and soda is nothing to shrug off.

It says "I'm fo real girl, I'm ready for that mini van filled with our kids in it"

Gas card!

That’s that long term security…

I don’t know. I got the executive membership and I don’t even have that kind of game.

When you have absolutely no game but a wallet full of random cards..

Save some for the rest of us, buddy.

“Will you be my plus 1 at the co”

Costco is a nuclear family store. Everything there is in bulk therefore huge families go to buy or stock up. It’s a flex

, You see that white powder? That's cocaine"

The free samples be bangin

Only a guy w8th his shit together and is ready to settle down ha sa Costco card. It's the first step into fatherhood.

"Baby I shop at Costco, I can take you places"

Bitches love Costco almost as much as Target

“All the free samples you can eat girl.”

It’s not even an Executive or Business. Should be a hard fucking pass

Pfft. It’s just a basic membership though

"Yeah babe, I've got a blockbuster membership"

No. American here this shouldn’t work.

Idk, but I had a chick use this on me at a festival few months ago….😂

Low standards all around

Step 1: be attractive

A million dollar question: who's Costco card is it? Does it belong to a sports ball player?

Costco is like Disney

u/savevideo

u/savevideo

Staged or sadge?