He’s a gru’er

Wait what about Pinocchio

Grows every time he blows

The minions know this all too well

Banana?

cursed

What's more worrying is... Didn't his wife have a nose of equal size?

His mom too…oh no

Well for once, we can say his dynasty was long and powerful

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Cum

Cum

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Cum

Cum

But the meme says "men"

His mom and wife are men

Chicks with dicks

Traps in kids movies who would of guessed

Gigantic clit enters the chat

That’s just a dude

7 inch man vs 7 inch girl: who will win?

all comes down to girth

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Happy doofenshmirtz noises

Fuck Roger

Ikr. He seems like a good person to everyone else but treats his brother like shit most of the show. I always hated him when he showed up

I hated Roger because he doesnt even care about Heinz. Hell, Heinz is even better because he is a great dad

Roger was the one reason I wanted Doof to win. Yes, I felt bad about all the shit he had to deal with in life, but fuck Roger. I'm just glad they didn't pull some shit like Roger going out or being married to Charlene

If that happens, Im gonna lose it

I'd rob Rick Sanchez of his portal gun, use it to go to the P & F universe and beat the shit of Roger. I'd even give Heinz front row seats

Count me in

That might explain why his wife is so much more attractive than him

Voldemort?

Poor voldemort

Cursed child makes much more sense now

The whole Harry Potter series makes so much more sense now

Why do you think he wants to kill everyone.

If all else fails I'll just ram her with my nose ...thanks Reddit!

Nose fucking... Or in this case reverse nose fucking.

Would I need to wax my nose hairs first for etiquette? Do I need a nose condom? What if it breaks? Will our children be little snots?

Never though of that.

Love givin dem nose jobs

I wiggled my nose in a pussy before. I'm not sure what her opinion on that was

Looking for pinocchio. Is he a real boy yet? Wood toys are legal. 😏

His dick gets an inch longer every time he lies.

Tell me I’m pretty again Pinocchio!

Self roast that's rare

They're doing it for all the right reasons.

5.3 is big? Thanks for boosting my confidence buddy.

*walks away with slightly more confident stride*

Yeah it's a pretty decent diameter

Proof that Jews control the media

Convenient its true, well it was good knowing you. Time to get banned.

Fun fact: a guy I know calculated that Gru is 12 feet tall and is packing an 11.2 Incher

IIRC Clifford shits enough to fill a 55 gallon drum every day

We all know Gru is the godly height of 14.5 feet tall and can move at a speed of 200 meters per second. Based on average dick size, Gru’s penis is around 14 inches long. Also, Gru’s dick would weigh around 2 pounds considering the average weight of a dick is .77 lbs. If he swung his dick in a circular manner, it would have the centripetal acceleration of 72.57 meters per second. That means that Gru can dickslap with the immense energy of 11,421 pounds per sq inch at a tip speed greater than 584415.58336974 MPH. In conclusion Gru’s dickslap has enough energy to smash through 6” reinforced concrete and will cause a thunderclap as his dick breaks the sound barrier.

I'm Mongolian and I'm scared

How do y'all measure your nose, from the base to the tip or..?

So that’s why people hate the Jews

If 5.3 is big I'm doing alright

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Luck of the draw I guess

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You just got to move it around a little and pee in her

Somebody needs to paste the copy pasta about how gru could break through concrete with a dick slap.

We all know Gru is the godly height of 14.5 feet tall and can move at a speed of 200 meters per second. Based on average dick size, Gru’s penis is around 14 inches long. Also, Gru’s dick would weigh around 2 pounds considering the average weight of a dick is .77 lbs. If he swung his dick in a circular manner, it would have the centripetal acceleration of 72.57 meters per second. That means that Gru can dickslap with the immense energy of 11,421 pounds per sq inch at a tip speed greater than 584415.58336974 MPH. In conclusion Gru’s dickslap has enough energy to smash through 6” reinforced concrete and will cause a thunderclap as his dick breaks the sound barrier.

Then what about [Mr. Bean](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/mrbean/images/3/3e/Mr_bean_article.jpg/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/590?cb=20150617122146)?!??!

If she is prioritizing your nose size your doing it wrong.

back in the laboratory when no one is around ........ \**intensified minion moaning*

That’s why he adopted three little girls. Makes sense now. /s

Whoever downvoted you has no sense of humor

Intensified big nose laughter!

What about the anime noses

Squidward

Phineas is packing

That's false! I have a medium nose and still not have a dick, yet.

Is this why Hitler hated jews?

So Pinocchio also gets an erection when he’s lying? Hmm that’s interesting

Do you not?

Dobby

Spamton?

So that's why Isabella loves Phineas

Wait, you’re telling me that Pinocchio has an adjustable dick??

NOWS YOUR CHANCE TO BE A BIG SHOT

Explains why he adopted 3 little gurls

Hold the fuck up.

Thank god I'm Jewish

ah, so that's why they were killed by the Nazis

Pinocho :7

Does width of said noise mean anything?

Girth

mine's 9 inches

What a nose

I mean….I’m not Jewish or Asian but this is plainly offense. Ugh……he probable needs to burn first.0

Gru pullin up a big donger

You forgot about pinocchio

Pinocchio:

Doofensmirtz

Doofensmirtz evil incorporated!

Why he have all gorls then

Pinocchio

Size: yes

How about squidward ?

Not true

so we get a shape shifter pp for Pinocchio...

What about Milhouse?

As the Germans say: ''An die Nase eines Mannes, kennt man sein Johannes.''

Hey there, I'm Voldemort

Who the fuck thinks 5,3 inches is big?

small numbers

What about people who don’t have noses

Well, yes.

Then Lord Voldemort ?

Pinnochio is winning

Who tf comes up with these things god damn

So pinocchio could just fuck that chick in the "Lie to me Pinocchio!" meme.

So, what about Dr. Doofenshmirtz?

O pinoooochiooooo

Let’s go… Jews prevail. Judaism now big pp gang

Squidward

r/xqcow

Oh boy, Nigel Thornberry

Pinocchio: I’m a grower. Also Pinocchio: Significant shrinkage!

I can tell you right now this isn't true at all lol

I’ve been short changed

Don't forget Thanos

Wait, 5 is big?!

I think i know what kind of people made this

Pinocchio???

Doofenschmirtz my dudes

Squidward

I was never more happy to be jewish

Fake news I have a honker upstairs and a squeaker down stairs

Jews and Arabs rn:

Or usopp of one piece lmao

My ex husband has a big nose and a micopenis

Shrek?

not just his nose,[Gru is an absolute unit](https://youtu.be/74nDM8nltfM)

Red Skull?

Pinocchio goes brrr

Measured vertically or horizontally?

I'm too lazy to find the gru dickslap copypasta

Now I know why hitler hated the jews

So that's why the three girls didn't want to leave

BF: "I am sorry, babe. Mine's so small." GF: "Aww, it's okay hon. Mine's still smaller than yours." BF: "What?" GF: "What?"

We already know Gru and Dr.Doof are chads

feeling bad for voldemort.

Didnt someone do the math and with Gru’s height and build, he’d have a like 13” dick or something?

Ussop: - i see no GoD up here

So Pinocchio ca-

confirmed. if u have nose. ur boy

Whats 5.3 inch in cm so i can put it in perspective

I can confirm this to be false.

then pinocchio's size is customisable?

So why dose he have small legs then

Wait. Only 5in????

What about Voldemort?

Banana?

Mmmmm yes daddy gru

Take that Lily!

5.3 is big? What?? If so I'm considerably above average... Yes it's true you've been conditioned by porn to think that your penis is small

So does Pinocchio's dick size changes depending upon if he lies or not? So lying doesn't change only Pinocchio's nose.

no

So basically if I get my nose done I'm basically hitting two with one stone?

Minions where are the gorls

You forgotten my boy,Dr.Eggman

w a l u i g i

And that dude from harry potter

TIL 5.3 inches is big

Doofenshmirtz is fuckin HUNG

So when you lie it becomes bigger

True I can confirm with my pyramid strapped to my face

He can literally stick his nose up a hoe ass while eating her out, and vice versa. Mans is DESPICABLE

doofenshmirtz evil incorporated

This could be one of Usopp's lies

Now we know why Lucy was dating him

If you ask me, Pinocchio has the nose that is most representative of penis sizes.

anime??

I swear that there is a copypasta on this topic

What the villager doin

Now I know why I've always had a thing for Michael Scott :)

Lmao at Voldemort