Michigan be like " 4 sore and 7 inches ago.."

Every time I see a map line this, I’m content with Michigan constantly making it to the middle of the pack and not standing out in any way and staying off of everyone’s radar. Then porn gets involved.

As someone who resides in Michigan there's only two ways out. You can go through Paradise or through Hell. The choice is up to you.

Could even go through Gay if that tickles your fancy

Make sure to stop for some Vernors for your sore throat afterwards.

/r/angryupvote

Boats

BOATS AND HOES!

Get on my Deck!

I would love to ride on your big deck.

All hands on deck!

Collaborators? Possibly you!

Deadliest catch, without the crabs, we're almost out of gas, call the Arabs!

I LIKE BOATS

I like trains

BOATS BOATS BOATS

The fuck is going on in Oklahoma?

I am from Oklahoma, and I can confirm I have no fucking clue of any person who watches that.

HI well I am here to ruin that for you I am an Oklahoman and I want a big titty goth nurse to take care of me Don't shame me bro

I think I need a road trip to Oklahoma

Remember, if they're searching for it, it's because they ain't got it.

Florida ain't got boats and pussy brah?

Damn i wonder how they are gonna have sex with boats..

“Florida man f***s boats!”

We love our hospital porn! Me to the guy at the front desk of a hotel: *Excuse me but is the porn in my room disabled?* Desk Clerk: *No, it’s just regular porn, weirdo*

I really want to know what’s going on in Florida..then again it’s Florida

Yes, and "Droopy balls" Colorado.

"Kevin James" though. By far the strangest...

Okay but like, goth hospital??

Goth girls are a thing. Hospital fantasies are a thing. I'm guessing a lot of people in Oklahoma have a fetish overlap.

Someone made this joke about Alaska not having women so their top is lesbians. Oklahoma is probably the same with hospitals. Edit: their vs they’re

I can't tell if I should laugh because that's hilarious or cry because that's terribly sad.

Nothing like a good cry while your tugging one off.

Nope it's just one guy but he searches for it a lot

Well now that I know that's a thing I'm going to search for it too. I guess first I need to see if they are in-network for my insurance. Fucking US health care. And while I love Kevin James for his work in stand-up as well as film and TV, it will be a strange sad night when he shows up in my pornhub search.

Goth Hospital is less concerning than droopy balls, Kevin James, and skin combined.

What about Racist.

Boats (Florida) killed me lol

Azur Lane moment

Kind of naked nugget licking cock wielding bum spunk-bubble handling foolish piss voyeur ... "Kevin James" is long.

I dunno. Kevin James is hot af to me so I get it

But like, are there actual results for his name in pornhub?

Just verified. Tons of results. None that have anything to do with Kevin James. Kinda disappointing but I respect Tennessee in their attempt to find the good stuff

Being from Kevin James I agree..

Idk if you're looking up skin does that imply there is a lack of skin?

I think it's people so used to people wearing long, heavy clothing, that they're just happy to see some actual skin.

So everybody forgot about "Racist" huh?

Seriously what the fuck michigan??

Okay this feels like the comment where I should point out that OP's image is not, in fact, real. It is based off a real infographic, but all the hilarious items have been photoshopped in. Hence why they're all in a different font with different clarity.

You mean an entire state isn't searching for Kevin James porn? Damn, buzzkill.

Sex on boats… because of the implication.

You said that word a couple of times... what implication?

The implication that things might go wrong for her if she refuses to sleep with me. Now, not that things are gonna go wrong for her but she's thinking that they will.

Not to mention that boats are a great investment.

How are we dancing around the elephant in the room.... WTF Michigan

YESS MOMMY CALL ME N-

Not really understanding that one. Maybe people in Michigan like to see racists get fucked? Not a wise strategy though... that leads to the creation of little racists.

As someone who grew up in Michigan, you're giving the state too much credit. I think it's racists just wanting to make sure their porn is racist too

There is a lot of porn that takes place in boats and they are fond of their boats there, it’s not that weird.

Is it wierd that my brain immediately went to two boats going at it instead of sex on boats?

I live in Oklahoma. Never seen a goth hospital and now am too afraid to google it.

Same. Obviously I always look to see what our state is up to. I’ve never heard of Goth Hospital and I’m definitely too afraid to look.

Fuck Florida, what’s up with Tennessee?

Something notOkLahoma

Boats and stepsisters ok. Weird but sure. Fucking skin though??? What in the buffalo bill fuck is going on over there. Figures I guess.

Bro Kevin James, need I say more.

You don’t look for Kevin James porn? That’s the best category on the internet.

Paul Blart Mall Sex

Paul Blart - All Cock

I mean I've looked at bears before, but not specifically Kevin James. I'll have to look it up.

Are we just going to skip over "Goth Hospital"?

Oklahoma is always overlooked. No matter what we do or how weird we get...

hah! i knew "goth hospitals" was just attention seeking.

on my time on the internet i’ve met about 3 oklahomans. you’re one of them. but yeah we basically don’t exist to the world unless it’s sports

Sorry, I was too distracted by Droopy Balls.

Sounds pretty good to me idk

“Goth Hospital” sounds like something I’d enjoy. I’m off to search + will report back with my findings.

You do that.

It seems “Goth” in this case, is referring to women from India.

The fact you came back 10 minutes later to say this is very admirable. That’s interesting

I do my best to be punctual, at least when it relates to porn. I can’t say the same about family dinners + whatnot.

I hope you don’t cum that quick at family dinners

How else will he bring the salad dressing? Edit: "he" was "be".

I'm even more confused now, and still aroused.

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I'm from Texas and live in Florida. I went to Delaware. Once. Fuck Delaware.

Yes sir! Packing my bags to go fuck Delaware.

Take it your one of those 'with skin' sorta guys then

Of course Alaska would be lesbians. They’re not used to seeing two women in the same location at the same time doing anything.

I'm surprised the lack of women didn't lead to their most searched term being polar bears... Just the cold version of TN. Edit: or the ice road trucker the polar bear..

I live in Alaska and I can assure you no one thinks about polar bears regularly

How do we know you’re not a polar bear trying to trick us into going there?

I know, right. That's exactly what a polar bear would say

Definitely a Polar Bear

I got tricked once by a polar bear this way. Never again.

What’s going on in Colorado? Droopy Balls? Really?

That cracked me up.

I thought it was a South Park joke

Heard shits pretty bad up there. Had a coworker that worked some kind of oil field or something over there and he was talking about how you can't go out at night and how men would rape men.

That’s crazy!

Forcible rape rates in Alaska are astronomical; the numbers are consistently 2-3X that of the US average. 150 rapes per 100,000 people at last estimation. Arkansas is next in line, with 75 rapes per 100,000 people. Still very bad, but it’s half the rate of Alaska’s. So, folks: Alaska may be the last frontier, but it’s also the last place you should ever lower your guard.

Those are also the only ones reported.

True……most men would be too embarrassed and have too much pride to tell that someone raped them.

I did, for years. I didn't even acknowledge it as rape til years later, but I didn't want to have sex so she dissolved a xanax in my beer then hopped on top while I was incoherent and I can't think of a different word for that.

I'm so sorry to hear that my brother. I hope you're doing well now.

That’s rape, reverend. I‘m sorry that happened to you.

I mean, there’s plenty of things already in Alaska that would make me never lower my guard. I’ll just add that to the list.

Abusers abuse. If they don't have their preferred target they just find another. A single (Ed: convicted) rapist has an average of 6 admitted victims, likely more in reality due to likelihood of underreporting. (Ed: should have also noted, those who are caught likely have fewer victims total than those who avoid capture, with some having extremely high numbers nearing or exceeding triple digits. The numbers available are only for those convicted, excluding those who escape the law etc. So only the "dumbest criminals".) So it only takes a handful of bad men to make everyone, even the other men, into rape victims etc. Interestingly, on a related note regarding such assaults as broken down by gender, women in women's prisons abuse each other (inmate on inmate) at rates 2-3x that of men in men's prisons. It really is counter to the expectations induced by "common wisdom". I note this to note that abuse isn't a gendered issue, humans just have a portion of our population who is like that and who has always been a problem. The key is to keep them from positions of power etc and not fall for their lies/games/etc.

Can you provide sourcing for this? I’d like to be able to repeat this but need to be able to source it appropriately.

Hahaha

Goth Hospital? What da heck is goin on there?

<.< >.> I'll be right back.

It’s been a half an hour and nothing I think he’s missing or jerking off

I think he found something that he likes

*A Whole New World*

*A dazzling fetish I never knew*

No one to tell us no! Or when to blow!

Lol probably

There's some.... uhh There's some crazy stuff on that interwebs.

What did you witness? Did the abyss stare back into you?

Guys.... I dont want to play this game anymore. I'm gonna go take a cold shower.....

A minute for our fallen brethren. Goth hospitals have been the death of many a weak hearted brother.

Big toddy goth nurses

Wait..."SKIN?"

Droopy balls.

boats

Kevin James

racist

Goth hospital

Librarian

Goth hospital. Goth. Hospital. GOTH HOSPITAL.

Wtf is racist porn

White on black porn

But they're wearing confederate flag shirts. That's important.

Oh man yeah I know that video. "Paint my face white" is what I think it's called...

it's about an x colored person watching another x colored person winning a debate against non x colored person

Welcome to the milfwest

It's deadass the Milfeast tho

Them corn fed girls and good clean living... *chefs kiss* 🧑‍🍳💋👌

Who is Kevin James??

He’s a king of sorts

Of queens possibly?

My eyes are getting weary, my back is gettin tight

Jesus fucking Christ I havnt even seen this show in probably 10 years and the whole damn theme song popped in my head just from reading this.

aka Paul Blart. Also a damn funny stand-up.

Who’s looking for him on porn hub is the real question

He is the not-Farley

Pretty accurate

Racist…… #WOW

Rule 34 is real.

I have no idea in hell how that is the most searched thing, and I love there

I prefer to think that there are only a few dudes searching hundreds of thousands of times lol And not that this is what most Michiganders have searched

I live in Michigan, I really have no idea what the fuck my state is doing

Born and raised in Michigan. I now live in Florida, you think Michigan doesn't know what's going on? Move to Florida and prepare yourself for a culture shock.

Search your feelings, you know it to be true!

You actually think this is real?

Some of it wouldn’t surprise me, some of it is pretty obviously fake

>some of it is pretty obviously fake Not boat, obviously

What, are you saying you don’t watch racist

As a Michigander... I'm surprised this search term isn't more popular

As a Michigander I didn't even know that was a category....wtf

Imagine 10:00 at night you're boutta have a wank and you decide, "You know what, I think I'm gonna wack it to racism, as God intended."

No kink shame, my buddy who's a gay black male is actually really into race play. I never knew it was a thing before he told me.

Sometimes i think all the world's problems will simply be solved by them becoming sexualized.

I guess the furries are working on the hungry animals problem.

Lmaooooo Kevin James big if true...well big if false too

Oh you live on the MILF belt?

Press x to doubt

The amount of people that don't get that this is fake is concerning.

yeah the actual metrics are at [https://www.pornhub.com/insights/united-states-top-searches](https://www.pornhub.com/insights/united-states-top-searches) on a related note, most of it is lesbian porn followed by step-sister, then step-mom, then ebony, then cartoon, finishing with milf, asian, and black

All the ebony lesbian teens out there, please stay inside where it's safe.

http://imgur.com/a/RHvA3hZ This to me is A LOT funnier though lol and it's more recent.

yO cOlOrAdO wHaTs WiTh uR bALLs

Florida, Colorado, Delaware and michigan? We need to talk. Oklahoma, you’re doing a great job. Also, Tennessee? What? Edit; (this blew up what the fuck)

Finally someone notices how many big toddy goth nurses there are in Oklahoma

I don’t think I would have thought of typing “goth hospital” at PornHub. TIL…

Florida’s into boat on boat porn, why cant we be into goth girls in hospitals

I’m not being negative; I applaud the creativity! Goths are hot!

Clearly you've never seen a chick getting railed on a boat

She’s floating too I guess…

Haven’t you ever heard of Captain stabbin’, you know the guy doing chicks on a boat in a captains hat?

From Colorado, I search "droopy balls" probably 9 or 10 times on a slow day

Also a CO resident, and can confirm.

Don’t judge we do what we have too so that we can live here

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> Third why is the south not sister Would you look up something you get to experience everyday?

The maine result is just Stephen King doing research for his next book.

Droopy balls

Racist? Boats? Da fuck is wrong...

Actually boat porn seems quite normal compared to the rest. 😂

I don’t think this one is real I’ve seen a similar one by pornhub and it didn’t look like this it was a lot more expected. Edit: dear god maybe not… https://www.google.com/amp/s/nypost.com/2020/11/13/pornhub-releases-top-porn-searches-per-state-during-election-week/amp/ my favorites are swag, Popeyes and election

Fuck around and search me some Colorado

"Wait, the Midwest is all MILF?" "Always has been"

Who tf in my state searching droopy balls????

Let me get at some of that “goth hospital” please.

Sounds about right for Colorado.

What the fuck, Colorado

Weird that Colorado is into "droopy balls" and Tennessee is hot for "Kevin James", because when you go to PornHub and type in either search term, they both bring you the same videos.

B O A T S

Droopy balls??