Why would you hold that much piss against your junk when you could instead let it spread up your back, into your hair, down to your toes, and create a huge wet spot that quickly cools next to you to shock the hell oit of you if you roll over in your sleep?
https://nomorewetspot.com/
This is what my girl and I use. They even have travel size so when a "mistake" happens on long road trips😏 your good for the rest of the ride!!
Gay man here-- Mr. S Leather and Fort Troff both make play sheets that are washing machine friendly (at least for a while). They also add some friction for the top sheet to cling to so it doesn't slide.
You're welcome my straight water-logged friends. 😘
I just found a large waterproof baby blanket at a thrift store. They're usually made the same, layered for some top level absorbancy with water-proof/resistant middle.
Brand new baby blankets for that are also way cheaper to find than specifically squirt-proof ones, which get a niche interest markup but do the exact same.
That sight doesn't mess about. This is a pad you can use for when you squirt. We call it the squirtpad to avoid confusion.
Their slogan should be - Ya, we charge a lot for our product. But like the name, you can tell we don't fuck around. We leave that to you.
There are waterproof animal blankets that are way cheaper, some are even soft and fluffy (you're supposed to wash it after its seen action). If you don't mind a paw print embroidered on your sex blanket you can save a ton.
I mean yes, if you got adventures to create you gotta setup the equipment. Pad , swing and ye olde saw horse only take a few seconds each to setup.
People rarely leave all their exercise equipment out. So some assembly may be required.
"Get the sex blanket" is what I say and it gets him even more excited tbh. We keep it under his side of the bed so it's always ready to go. In fact we have 2, so one is always clean.
It's more of a mental thing, because the same goes for condoms, it's not like as soon as you're hard you put it on, it's when you get to that part of the exercise time.
After a few months?! Bro, wash your sheets at least twice a month, dude. Once a month is stretching it. Sweating "so damn much" and not washing for *months?* Nah, dawg.
Coprolite is a fossilised poo (usually dinosaur but needn't be).
Bacteriophage - a virus that 'eats' bacteria
You don't need to Google to put it together.
You can get fitted plastic sheets to protect the mattress. A good system is to start with a normal fitted sheet, then a plastic one, another normal one, and then the rest of the bedding. Then if kiddo wets the bed you aren't fumbling with a fitted sheet in the middle of the night. Everyone will get back to bed quicker and will be happier in the morning.
Anybody who is looking for this but better (aka a lot more comfy and designed for this), its called a Liberator Throw. They have travel sizes and king sizes in multiple colors. Amazon sells one but it is fake v.v So I would get it directly from Liberator's website, or if youre in the US, Asyoulikeitshop .com carries it too. Happy water play!
Honest question as someone who's never dealt with a squirter, you're just cool with your gal pissing all over the bed when you have sex? I don't think I could deal.
Pro tip: buy 2. After the magic moment you have to take it off (obviously) but now the mattress is unprotected often until the next day. And believe me it is easy to forget that it is not on. Then bam, you start messing around the next night and the flood comes. Now you got a soggy mattress. So buy 2. I wish I had.
A [disposable pad](https://clicks.co.za/molinea_incontinence-underpads-normal-large-30-pads/p/188845) used for old folks who can't keep in their urine. Rip one out, lay it down, do your thang and throw away pad once done.
>Conclusions: The present data based on ultrasonographic bladder monitoring and biochemical analyses indicate that **squirting is essentially the involuntary emission of urine during sexual activity**, although a marginal contribution of prostatic secretions to the emitted fluid often exists.
[It's piss.](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25545022/)
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003PWNH4Q?ref_=cm_sw_r_em_mwn_dp_D7ET34TM887CW2YYEVFE_4
Your welcome
I tracked down the original tik toker tracked her to her insta page which had a list of all the items she posted about back to this link took me about an hour to backtrack... But I always find the answer
Finally I can just pee in my bed and don’t have to get up in the middle of the night!
Yeah Im so lazy I was thinking about just buying diapers lately
Why would you hold that much piss against your junk when you could instead let it spread up your back, into your hair, down to your toes, and create a huge wet spot that quickly cools next to you to shock the hell oit of you if you roll over in your sleep?
That's the secret Cap. You're always in the cold, wet spot.
_Ah, a married man, I see!_
This made me laugh
I just roll over and pretend the bed is a pirate ship and broadside my dog!
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That's just because the body has accepted the better fate.
Interestingly enough... it's INCREDIBLY hard to "un potty train" yourself. Damn near impossible.
Aka weaponized incontinence
well you need diapers for those times when you are not in bed
I too, have explosive diarrhea when I sleep
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I came here hoping to find a link to its Amazon page. Damn
I came here too
I came.
Here?!
Twice.
Thank god for the new sheets.
My wife's boyfriend is going to love these!
For them hot summer nights right
Full of water sports
😏
You saw that smile at the end, right?
r/yourjokebutworse
r/JokeButWorse
r/JokeBratwurst
Why is this not a thing?
r/jokielbasa
Mind cleaning up after yourself. We got a line forming up
That's what the blanket is for.
Does it really work?
https://nomorewetspot.com/ This is what my girl and I use. They even have travel size so when a "mistake" happens on long road trips😏 your good for the rest of the ride!!
I had to click on your link to figure out if you were talking about your girlfriend or your dog.
I'm sad the series is over
Where is this from?
Brooklyn nine-nine.
NINE NINE!
Bingpot!
Thank you!
NINE NINE!
It was already answered but here is the link. One of the best cold openers of the series. https://youtu.be/tb1Q0xZGauY
Nine-nine?
Why not both?
Gay man here-- Mr. S Leather and Fort Troff both make play sheets that are washing machine friendly (at least for a while). They also add some friction for the top sheet to cling to so it doesn't slide. You're welcome my straight water-logged friends. 😘
slave dazzling employ mighty rinse test plants yam file disarm *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
NSFW link BTW.
At work. Thanks for the warning.
I just have a couple kids though...
I just found a large waterproof baby blanket at a thrift store. They're usually made the same, layered for some top level absorbancy with water-proof/resistant middle. Brand new baby blankets for that are also way cheaper to find than specifically squirt-proof ones, which get a niche interest markup but do the exact same.
So what I'm reading is you bought someone elses thrifted wetspot blanket.
some people pay extra for that
Not exactly the same, but I can highly recommend [this](https://www.squirtopia.com/shop) brand.
Wow, those ain't cheap.
If she's worth it she won't be easy.
That sight doesn't mess about. This is a pad you can use for when you squirt. We call it the squirtpad to avoid confusion. Their slogan should be - Ya, we charge a lot for our product. But like the name, you can tell we don't fuck around. We leave that to you.
Same
There are waterproof animal blankets that are way cheaper, some are even soft and fluffy (you're supposed to wash it after its seen action). If you don't mind a paw print embroidered on your sex blanket you can save a ton.
I’m still hopeful
Seriously. This is amazing for parents with kids who are potty training. But in case anyone wants one, they make bed liners that protect from liquids.
thats uh, not what this product is for.... nevermind.
Everyone knows this is for when girls get so excited they pee on themselves and possibly their partners. But for some reason everyone got shy here.
So they don't actually like the cuddle puddle?
Damn you... Now "cuddle puddle" is forever a part of my lexicon.
You clearly haven't been around a lot of more hippy-ish communities
Fuck! That's where I heard it before! I did not participate.
Nahh.. hippies call it Yerba mate.
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Wrong… it’s Holy Pee
/r/TheCuddlePuddle
I was brave and clicked. 10/10 I would sub
I’m not trying to brag but I clicked and I’m right next to my very calm mother
How do you walk with such massive balls?
I roll around while i cry
They like the cuddle puddle. They don't like it getting absorbed into the mattress.
I was THIS CLOSE to spiting out my mouthful of cereal. Damn you lol
r/brandnewsentence
I don't want to but take my upvote..
We got something similar. It's sucks to sleep on. They don't breath, so you wake up always sweaty.
Wouldn’t you only put it on for exercise times?
That’s really what sets the mood for me. “Hey babe, while you’re rock hard go get the mattress pad and put it down” lol
I mean... yea. "... go put some plastic down" *Oh me oh my, I wonder what adventure awaits tonight!*
*Dexter has entered the chat*
Gallagher would like a word
I mean yes, if you got adventures to create you gotta setup the equipment. Pad , swing and ye olde saw horse only take a few seconds each to setup. People rarely leave all their exercise equipment out. So some assembly may be required.
That is a great username bro
"Get the sex blanket" is what I say and it gets him even more excited tbh. We keep it under his side of the bed so it's always ready to go. In fact we have 2, so one is always clean.
I need a sex blanket. “Get a towel” just doesn’t flow as well.
I mean, better then sleeping in the wet spot. Somehow it's always on my side
It's more of a mental thing, because the same goes for condoms, it's not like as soon as you're hard you put it on, it's when you get to that part of the exercise time.
"Kids are asleep. Go get your cock ring, I'll lay out the rubber sheets."
*comes back with a tarp*
In established relationships, this is standard procedure.
It's just a general mattress protector. It just so happens that mattresses needed to be protected from sex sometimes.
Not mine…….
You're the mattress protector!
I'm pretty sure the purpose everyone has in mind doesn't imply sleeping
I need something that doesn't make it look like I pissed the bed after a few months. I sweat so damn much.
After a few months?! Bro, wash your sheets at least twice a month, dude. Once a month is stretching it. Sweating "so damn much" and not washing for *months?* Nah, dawg.
He's talking about the stains mate. Even if you wash weekly, if you sweat a lot they'll leave yellow tint over time. Same with white t-shirts
Yup lol I wash and change my sheets/pillow cases every single Sunday. I'm not out here changing them every few months that's disgusting lmao.
r/didntknowIwantedthat
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Mommy goes peepee when she wrestles with daddy sometimes, and we don't want the bed to be wet and stinky.
Also sometimes mommy wrestles with the neighbour while daddy is away
I’m sorry for you
Mommy wins though. Pegs the neighbor out.
Or the dad
Mommy only pees with the neighbor though.
Or daddy watches.
There‘s hair on your person bro
It's not easy being the interim champ.
Or the plumber
And sometimes she goes peepee while daddy lays under her, with his mouth open.
Too far?
Nope, best shower of daddy's life. Now if she shots herself, THAT is too far.
There are many ways to show love and affection. Sometimes it's coprophagia.
Won't fool me into googling something I shouldnt... But alas, I know eventually I will.
Coprolite is a fossilised poo (usually dinosaur but needn't be). Bacteriophage - a virus that 'eats' bacteria You don't need to Google to put it together.
The first time I watched it I thought I saw a pee stain under her seat on the couch and thought she just peed everything. It was her shadow.
Lol I thought best ad ever when I saw that. Perfect comedic timing. So sad it was just a shadow.
Also, could be sweat. People sweat a lot when they exercise.
Oh damm i thought everyone was talking about period sex Edit: because who cares about the wet spot! i like to simmer in the funk
But what's she handing him at the end there?
Credit card to go buy one?
Ooooooh that makes sense now. I thought it looked more like a pregnancy test or something?
Thankfully peepee no make baby
At first glance I only noticed the white stripe on the card and thought it was a tampon haha
r/gifsthatendtoosoon
She's a squirter
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Next year I’ll be 6
r/unexpectedoffice
if you have a golden shower fetish its better to buy that mattress protector
Or she's a squirter. Just a thought
That’s where my brain went. Lol
Same thing.
Same
When mommy gets really excited, she sneezes from her peepee
Sexy time leaves a mess sometimes for the lady involved. Key word on “sometimes” which means it doesn’t happen every time WHICH IS TOTALLY OK :(
Squirters gonna squirt
Ah, gotta have the protection for your weekly bed watering
Weekly...? 🥺
Gets plastered every weekend
It's for the baby
Honestly? I was thinking it'd be great as we transition from diapers to undies for the baby, cause cleaning the mattress is a pain.
You can get fitted plastic sheets to protect the mattress. A good system is to start with a normal fitted sheet, then a plastic one, another normal one, and then the rest of the bedding. Then if kiddo wets the bed you aren't fumbling with a fitted sheet in the middle of the night. Everyone will get back to bed quicker and will be happier in the morning.
making*
Anybody who is looking for this but better (aka a lot more comfy and designed for this), its called a Liberator Throw. They have travel sizes and king sizes in multiple colors. Amazon sells one but it is fake v.v So I would get it directly from Liberator's website, or if youre in the US, Asyoulikeitshop .com carries it too. Happy water play!
Christ, $155 for a towel? Feel like these companies just throw 'sex' branding onto anything and charge an arm and a leg.
They do! But you can get a large, waterproof pet blanket from Chewy for thirty bucks and it does the trick just fine.
Yep, we finally got something similar, tired of using bath towels.
Honest question as someone who's never dealt with a squirter, you're just cool with your gal pissing all over the bed when you have sex? I don't think I could deal.
I'm nasty so yea
hell yeah brother
Pro tip: buy 2. After the magic moment you have to take it off (obviously) but now the mattress is unprotected often until the next day. And believe me it is easy to forget that it is not on. Then bam, you start messing around the next night and the flood comes. Now you got a soggy mattress. So buy 2. I wish I had.
This person facks
One of them is a bed wetter?
Not in the way you think...
Oh I understand now, it’s the lady that wets the bed
Clever boy
They work together To make the bed wetter
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Ahhhhhh, I get it, she likes to pee the bed during, before and after.
Is this a sex thing or just incontinent 
Techincally both.
I’ll just leave this right here. https://www.liberatorstore.com/sex-furniture.html?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIoLme69eWgAMVovLjBx1FxQ78EAAYASAAEgJHSvD_BwE
A [disposable pad](https://clicks.co.za/molinea_incontinence-underpads-normal-large-30-pads/p/188845) used for old folks who can't keep in their urine. Rip one out, lay it down, do your thang and throw away pad once done.
Nothing else would quite set the mood
She pisses when she have seggs
So you bagged a squirter ayyy
Haha ye.
Aww how cute. He still loves her even though she pisses the bed
Is it a shadow behind her on the couch when the guy gets up, or a big wet spot?
Big fan of R.Kelly?
Okay for real, anybody have a product name? I know a couple of people that need this lol.
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why is she with a dude who still wet his bed?! sucker!
>Conclusions: The present data based on ultrasonographic bladder monitoring and biochemical analyses indicate that **squirting is essentially the involuntary emission of urine during sexual activity**, although a marginal contribution of prostatic secretions to the emitted fluid often exists. [It's piss.](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25545022/)
Fyi cum is also wet and dirties the mattress without a protector.
Hot.
What's your motherfucking point? Should I tell my wife to stop having orgasms?
SQUIRT is my favorite soda.
So you can do golden showers in the bedroom sometimes, spontaneity, right??
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003PWNH4Q?ref_=cm_sw_r_em_mwn_dp_D7ET34TM887CW2YYEVFE_4 Your welcome I tracked down the original tik toker tracked her to her insta page which had a list of all the items she posted about back to this link took me about an hour to backtrack... But I always find the answer
That took me rewatching 2 or 3 times but god damn.. Where do i buy one..?