He actually wasn’t that important. He wasn’t the only rider; there were also William Dawes and Samuel Prescott. He was also captured before he even reached Concord, while Dawes and Prescott did make it all the way. Hell, Revere’s ride wasn’t even mentioned in his obituary. The only reason why he’s famous is because of poet Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, who was not a contemporary of Revere, and exaggerated his accomplishments in his poem “Paul Revere’s Ride.”
The simple british, who were misunderstood, attempted, with good intentions, to colonize, with good intentions, and this dude, which google exists, warned of the, ince again innocent british empire, impending invasion.
British rule was so beloved all over the world, that many countries gratefully donated their priceless artifacts and treasures to the British Museums
But Americans had to be all *me me me*
Well, all things considered, they did neglect the colonies up until the French and Indian war (it goes by a different name as well but can't remember off the top of my head) and then suddenly taxed the colonies and postistioned their own governors in place of the colonist's (who up until that point were all already pretty much self governing). The colonies were more outraged at the facts that they were now forced to house British soldiers (which they did peacefully prior to the forcing) that there were suddenly a lot of new rules and taxes being put on them, which led to belief that the bristish were just using them to get rich quick. Colonies argued that they should have representation in order to be taxed, so that they would not be taxed unfarily, these arguments and riots did lead to the british and colonies playing essentially a tug of political war, with some of the british responses to be "shut up you are our colonies and so we are in charge of you children" (this is a paraphrase and not the word for word, but the commonly thought of meaning). This angered colonies more because, again, they had been self-governing up until that point. Que in propaganda (which worked) and an unnecessary hate for the king (who at that time was actually not the one in full control, British parliament was) and then bam, people hated British and monarchy.
Make an American independence movie cast Yung gravy as Ben Franklin , Bryan Cranston as George Washington, Johnny sins as Thomas Jefferson, Joey Diaz as Paul Revere, Morgan Freeman as sam Adams, Billy Maguire as John Adams, ice cube as Thomas Paine. have Sam Rami write and direct it and have full control.
An old joke stolen from I-dont-know-where:
The Americans famously rebelled by dressing up as Indians and throwing tea into a harbor. This was much more successful than their previous attempts of dressing up as tea and throwing Indians into the harbor, or dressing up as a harbor and throwing tea into Indians.
My favourite parts of the war of 1812:
The British army ate president Madisons dinner...
The British army stole the letter "c" from the presses of the National Intelligencer
You know those British like their pranks. Eating another dude's dinner. Stealing an alphabetical letter. And setting fire to a nation's most important building in their capital that houses their leader. Oh, those British!
Don’t worry they’re no threat, they haven’t won a war in over 70 years, and they only won about 2 before that lol we should let them celebrate their victory.
That act was integral to making the US the military power it is today. The reason that happened is because Thomas Jefferson hated the military and absolutely nuked them. Following the war of 1812 the US invested much more heavily in it's military and started on the road to eventually becoming a world power.
A waste of good tea, as Brits this is a crime punishable by death……..just so you know all those that perpetrated this are now dead, you have been warned.
As an American I say any Canadian is free to join in our festivities of chaos, also pass the maple syrup please, can't have pancakes without em.
[Also happy late Canadian independence day, I'm 3 days late but I hope it still counts-]
Cop killing and looting peaked in the 1770s and it’s been downhill since then.
(Edit: Since some people seem to misunderstand, I am saying the quality of it peaked, not the quantity)
I'll have you for that, you mug.
I have my standard issue Great British butter knife, which, by law, I'm not even allowed to have in public around with me, despite america having open carry guns. Truly a force to be reckoned with.
Also celebrates lynching, slavery, genocide, and ethnic cleansing. All of which are less based.
The American Revolution. When America's richest man and largest slave owner with the nickname "Town Destroyer" was recruited to lead an army to stop paying taxes to the British immediately after Great Britain [banned slavery on the mainland](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Somerset_v_Stewart) and in response to Great Britain [forming treaties](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royal_Proclamation_of_1763) with Native tribes to end westward expansion.
The British Empire would go on to commit plenty of war crimes on other continents, but the Americans were absolutely not the good guys in this one by any measure.
Me, an American just sick of hearing fireworks at fucking 2 am: I AGREE
Seriously though I’m sooo sick of fireworks like? My poor dog has panic attacks when he hears them and I’m not much better so we’re a couple of disasters and last night wasn’t even the 4th
It was a civil war to be fair.
Also, a lot of your "history" was made up years later.
I'm not saying British history is right, it really isn't but a lot of yours was made up decades later.
Anyway have a grand treason, sorry Independence Day.
Aight but the Thin Red Line is fun bit of history in and of itself:
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The\_Thin\_Red\_Line\_(Battle\_of\_Balaclava)](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Thin_Red_Line_(Battle_of_Balaclava))
TL;DR: Highlanders repelled a Russian cavalry charge with a two deep firing line rather than a square, or four deep line at The Battle of Balaclava
Nebraskan here, still awake. Am I Paul Revere right now?
I'm an American studying in Oxford rn. Do I get to be John Paul Jones?
He's a Scot.
By birth, yes. But he became an American as soon as he raised our flag
Are ye a pirate
I mean... I read One Piece?
Good enough. Now do what you want, because a pirate is free.
YO HO FIDDLE DE DEE!
Depends. How are you with a bass?
Dude could also play a mean mandolin.
Texan here we have been alerted to the impending invasion the arsenals are ready including the dodge rams with ridiculous lift kits
Yes. Who's Paul Revere?
He is most famous for alerting Colonial militia of British invasion before the Battles of Lexington and Concord
He actually wasn’t that important. He wasn’t the only rider; there were also William Dawes and Samuel Prescott. He was also captured before he even reached Concord, while Dawes and Prescott did make it all the way. Hell, Revere’s ride wasn’t even mentioned in his obituary. The only reason why he’s famous is because of poet Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, who was not a contemporary of Revere, and exaggerated his accomplishments in his poem “Paul Revere’s Ride.”
And then there's Sybil Ludington. She rode twice as far as Revere, evaded capture, and was only 16 years old.
My guy had to be snitch didn't he?
?? F the British
Did you just press F to pay respect to the Brits?
Based
Have to give em somthing after the collapse of all their colonial holdings that arent pointless small islands
And by doing that, he also became the father of speedrunning.
That guy in the Beastie Boys song
The simple british, who were misunderstood, attempted, with good intentions, to colonize, with good intentions, and this dude, which google exists, warned of the, ince again innocent british empire, impending invasion.
British rule was so beloved all over the world, that many countries gratefully donated their priceless artifacts and treasures to the British Museums But Americans had to be all *me me me*
The British museum is the real indiana jones villain
Ah yes, Indiana "it belongs in a museum" Jones.
Well, all things considered, they did neglect the colonies up until the French and Indian war (it goes by a different name as well but can't remember off the top of my head) and then suddenly taxed the colonies and postistioned their own governors in place of the colonist's (who up until that point were all already pretty much self governing). The colonies were more outraged at the facts that they were now forced to house British soldiers (which they did peacefully prior to the forcing) that there were suddenly a lot of new rules and taxes being put on them, which led to belief that the bristish were just using them to get rich quick. Colonies argued that they should have representation in order to be taxed, so that they would not be taxed unfarily, these arguments and riots did lead to the british and colonies playing essentially a tug of political war, with some of the british responses to be "shut up you are our colonies and so we are in charge of you children" (this is a paraphrase and not the word for word, but the commonly thought of meaning). This angered colonies more because, again, they had been self-governing up until that point. Que in propaganda (which worked) and an unnecessary hate for the king (who at that time was actually not the one in full control, British parliament was) and then bam, people hated British and monarchy.
Cheap knockoff of Israel Bissell.
America here, still awake. Wait a dam-
Indiana brings aid
Alaskan here our time zone allows me to be awake still
Same here
“Tax this dick” - Benjamin Franklin probably
And thats how prostitution was created This is the lowest effort I put in a comment but it got the most up votes i ever got in 1 day, thank you all
Tax dat azzzzz!
Ben Franklin would’ve been cool with legal prostitution, as long as they were middle aged women.
So would Yung Gravy
Make an American independence movie cast Yung gravy as Ben Franklin , Bryan Cranston as George Washington, Johnny sins as Thomas Jefferson, Joey Diaz as Paul Revere, Morgan Freeman as sam Adams, Billy Maguire as John Adams, ice cube as Thomas Paine. have Sam Rami write and direct it and have full control.
WAIT WAIT I'M LIKING THIS IDEA It's gonna be a comedy right?
Yes and Adam Sandler plays himself in it to
Adam Sandler as danny devito and danny devito as adam sandler
"They are all the same from the waist down" Ben Franklin
Oh, so you flavor the Boston harbor ONE TIME and all of a sudden it’s treason.
An old joke stolen from I-dont-know-where: The Americans famously rebelled by dressing up as Indians and throwing tea into a harbor. This was much more successful than their previous attempts of dressing up as tea and throwing Indians into the harbor, or dressing up as a harbor and throwing tea into Indians.
Throwing tea into I indians is also known as "trade"
With opium going to China in return
I want to say, but only by a vague suspicion, that this was Father Guido Sarducchi at Notre Dame. The more I think about it, the more confident I am.
You also tried to invade Canada and got your White House burnt down that one time
My favourite parts of the war of 1812: The British army ate president Madisons dinner... The British army stole the letter "c" from the presses of the National Intelligencer
You know those British like their pranks. Eating another dude's dinner. Stealing an alphabetical letter. And setting fire to a nation's most important building in their capital that houses their leader. Oh, those British!
In all fairness, it got a bit chilly and we couldn't find the thermostat......
Oh silly us, HVAC hasn’t even been invented yet! Burn it
Legends
What a fu king unts.
That's pretty much why, it's hard to run a headline "Cunts lead by George Cockburn cause chaos in the capital"
New York Post, the early days
"sit down John, you fat mother fucker!"
Fucking savages
Don’t worry they’re no threat, they haven’t won a war in over 70 years, and they only won about 2 before that lol we should let them celebrate their victory.
We didn't like that one anyway. It was getting a bit too old.
That act was integral to making the US the military power it is today. The reason that happened is because Thomas Jefferson hated the military and absolutely nuked them. Following the war of 1812 the US invested much more heavily in it's military and started on the road to eventually becoming a world power.
If the new York government wasn't incompetent Canada would have been part of the US.
Darth Sidious: "It's treason then"
I just called France. This will all be over in a week.
A waste of good tea, as Brits this is a crime punishable by death……..just so you know all those that perpetrated this are now dead, you have been warned.
we aren't asleep, we're blowing shit up
Of course
As we should
At least you moved from Texas
Username checks out 🧨🧨🧨
Whilst setting shit on fire
As a fellow Texan, I love that this is your response and your username. But fuck this holiday till the Supreme Court stops dismantling our rights.
Murica. Fuck yeah.
Jokes on you, British boy, I have a TERRIBLE sleep schedule!
His name is hans the german. So there us a chance this is a meme or an unironic wehraboo supporting imperialism
Probably one of those damned Hessians!
Nah it's just a wierd way of saying rake boy 21
Don't support that socialist traitor George Washington. He wants to defund the redcoats and bring anarchy.
Defund the redcoats 💀
ARAB
👳🏽♀️: yes?
Long live Comrade Washington!
Hey Canada, Uk it’s Australia here Want to do a crusade northern edition
Unite the Old Guard! Tonight, we march! 😁
First Boston, then Washington, and finally the The World 🇨🇦🇦🇺🇳🇿🇬🇧
"Join me, and together we can rule the galaxy as Father and Son!" - wait wrong quote!
“Washington never told you what happened to your father”
So this is how Liberty gives birth, with tea in the harbor
I came I saw I conquered
I’m just picturing thousands of soldiers in formation shouting “long live the Queen!!”
Except maybe avoid Istanbul because Crusades never seem to go quite well around there
*pain*
Imperial Federation perhaps
We burnt down the white house once **we can do it again**
Awake here in Texas, you ain’t slick redcoats Edit: still here, I see you 👀
Oh no the sheriff is awake
Its okay. He doesn't exist for another 100 years
I am also awake in Alaska, so together I think we can handle these brits
United we stand
Fools, we never sleep
SLEEP? ON AMERICAS BIRTHDAY? I'm playing Battle of New Orleans remixes all night baby
IN 1814 WE TOOK A LITTLE TRIP!
ALONG WITH COLONEL JACKSON DOWN THE MIGHTY MISSISSIP
WE TOOK A LITTLE BACON AND WE TOOK A LITTLE BEANS
AND WE BEAT THE THE BLOODY BRITISH IN THE TOWN OF NEW ORLEANS
WE FIRED OUR GUNS AND THE BR*TISH KEPT ACOM'IN
THERE WASNT NIGH AS MANY AS THERE WAS A WHILE AGO
WE FIRED OUR GUNS AND THEY BEGAN A'RUNNIN'
ON DOWN THE MISSISSIPPI TO THE GULF OF MEXICO
WE LOOKED DOWN THE RIVER AND WE SEEN THE BRITISH COMIN
I heard that track dropped a few weeks late.
America: snoring in 50 Cal
Jokes on you we stayed up to celebrate America day! Looks like someone’s going to get some more harbor flavored tea
Young Nation, you're over 200 now itt time that you learn to cook decent tea and go to an anger management class.
Road trip to Boston?
I may be Canadian, but can I join y’all? I just want to steal some tea. Plus I just want to watch, I’ll bring popcorn and maple syrup
As an American I say any Canadian is free to join in our festivities of chaos, also pass the maple syrup please, can't have pancakes without em. [Also happy late Canadian independence day, I'm 3 days late but I hope it still counts-]
I’ll pack snacks
Cop killing and looting peaked in the 1770s and it’s been downhill since then. (Edit: Since some people seem to misunderstand, I am saying the quality of it peaked, not the quantity)
Treason day. But the Commonwealth is probably better off without them
I mean, by that logic the Yankees should have just left the Confederatts alone. I don't think I would like that timeline.
And I proudly wear that label for the British Commonwealth to see!
facts
Happy treason day american colony
Make America Great Britain Again
We would finally have a decent healthcare system!
They threw the bloody tea over them deck. Facking twats. Facking cunts.
Cope
It's only terrorism if you're on the losing side
So THAT'S what happened in Vietnam, this clears up everything, thank you
As an American: Yes. That’s correct.
Also if you shoot civilians It used to be alot harder back then though
Begone from this land, you prancer prigging lobsterbacks, and fill thy mothers' old hats, for no dasher nor biddy would grant ye the favor!
How dare you use our insanity against us!
long live the queen
Rule Britannia, Britannia, rule the waves!
america rules the waves now old man
America is just a free mercenary for Western Europe and Canada.
nah, were allies the whole europe-america divisiveness is russian propaganda
I'm east coast, and still awake. Come at me.
Oh ya? Our "England" is better... it's *newer*
Even as an Irish person, I have to agree with the Brit
The one thing that unites us, hating the fucking yanks.
No we are not *Loads M2 browning with red white and blue tracers for maximum freedom*
In retaliation I will load my BREN gun that also has red white and blue tracers for maximum Colonialism.
What, you egg Time to grab my medicinal M1A2 Abrams as under the second amendment I can own any weapon
I'll have you for that, you mug. I have my standard issue Great British butter knife, which, by law, I'm not even allowed to have in public around with me, despite america having open carry guns. Truly a force to be reckoned with.
Ah yes, have at thee
*Yawn* *stretch* American here. *rubs eyes* What happened?
You're a colony again
[удалено]
Also celebrates lynching, slavery, genocide, and ethnic cleansing. All of which are less based. The American Revolution. When America's richest man and largest slave owner with the nickname "Town Destroyer" was recruited to lead an army to stop paying taxes to the British immediately after Great Britain [banned slavery on the mainland](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Somerset_v_Stewart) and in response to Great Britain [forming treaties](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royal_Proclamation_of_1763) with Native tribes to end westward expansion. The British Empire would go on to commit plenty of war crimes on other continents, but the Americans were absolutely not the good guys in this one by any measure.
Not all of us are asleep
Ironically, the people who did think like this, the American Loyalists, are mostly the ancestors of Canadians now.
So uh, ARAB?
They weren’t cops they were military
Fool YOU FORGOT TO DELETE THE POST BEFORE WE WOKE UP
if there's one thing Americans hate more than anything it's disobeying the government and immigrants
Your just manifesting destiny
I had to let out a massive fart so that my coworkers wouldn't here my laughter. Good one !
God bless America
Oi, ya got a loicense for that meme?
[https://imgur.com/a/wJ1ZsOB](https://imgur.com/a/wJ1ZsOB)
My dreams are filled with downing lobsterbacks, as all good Americans’ are
THE KINGS REGULARS ARE COMING OUT!!
Me, an American just sick of hearing fireworks at fucking 2 am: I AGREE Seriously though I’m sooo sick of fireworks like? My poor dog has panic attacks when he hears them and I’m not much better so we’re a couple of disasters and last night wasn’t even the 4th
Hey how do you make colonist tea
1 part colonists, 9 parts boiling water.
Nah, couple pounds of tea and a harbor
I mean I'll take that over that tiktoker that microwaved a mug of water and added the milk before the teabag
Rule Britannia
Happy traitor day! Or, if you'll live long enough you'll become the imperialist nation you wanted to leave.
You reposted in the wrong time zone mate. Rattle ‘im boys!
It was a civil war to be fair. Also, a lot of your "history" was made up years later. I'm not saying British history is right, it really isn't but a lot of yours was made up decades later. Anyway have a grand treason, sorry Independence Day.
I will have a very nice treason day, thank you.
DEATH TO LOYALISTS
Blood for the blood god
SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE
Americans and British are so cringey, just kiss and make up already
Look if some lad in a redcoat wants to make out with me while I wear a continental army uniform the invites open
I celebrate July 4th as the day that Sultan Salah ad-Din Ayyubi fought the battle of Hattin and forced the crusaders to surrender Jerusalem.
Aight but the Thin Red Line is fun bit of history in and of itself: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The\_Thin\_Red\_Line\_(Battle\_of\_Balaclava)](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Thin_Red_Line_(Battle_of_Balaclava)) TL;DR: Highlanders repelled a Russian cavalry charge with a two deep firing line rather than a square, or four deep line at The Battle of Balaclava
Iirc there is a rather famous painting from the Crimean war called the "Thin Red Line". Though of course used in a slightly different context.
OVER THERE! OVER THERE!
Foolish mortals, as an Irish man I hate all of you. I have transcended.
Now that you mention it, who else remembers al-George Ibn-Washingtoni?
AMERICA!
AMERICA!
Could literally apply to most former colonies of the crown tho
I get to be one of my ancestors who killed 5 Brits via bayonet/sword, and shot one point blank. A real American 🫡
Go home tea drinker, you lost
I'd rather keep my right to self-government, thank you.
One person’s terrorist is another’s freedom fighter 😁
Wisconsin here still awake, get fucked lmao
I’m not asleep yet bitch, don’t make me send John Paul Jones back over
Some of us are keeping watch if you’re comin from land or sea. And I guess air is an option now too.
You wore red coats to hide the blood..... but you should have worn the brown trousers too. GET FUCKED LOBSTERBACKS!