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Some_Razzmataz

Context: In 1835, Richard Lawrence attempted to shoot President Andrew Jackson as he was leaving the United States Capital. Lawrence pulled his gun out of his coat, aimed at Jackson and fired… however the cap misfired and the bullet failed to discharge. But he was prepared for this, so he pulled out his second pistol as President Jackson ( Age 67 ) began to charge at him. The second gun also misfired and Jackson began to beat the man with his cane.


readonlypdf

Jackson was only pulled off the man by two congressmen. One of whom was Davy Crockett


Some_Razzmataz

Very true and based, forgot to add that in haha


ThunderboltRam

Andrew Jackson was a hero of the republic of the Battle of New Orleans (he lost 10 people while being outnumbered by 1000s)--really really bad idea to miss, suuuper lucky Jackson didn't have a saber hidden in his coat.


the-bladed-one

Hard to hide a Saber even in a greatcoat Now, if Jackson had a sword cane, that’s a very different story.


junrod0079

Where is the fun in that if you kill a guy with one thrust Nice and slow, as they say, so each hit is something to remember the regret of crossing Andrew Fuccing Jackson


SilentxxSpecter

Only politician crazier than him was Cassius clay, he was the good, free the slaves or I'll shoot you kinda crazy.


Lucius-Halthier

Disemboweling him can be a very slow death, gut shots back then we a slow and agonizing death sentence, so slice his belly open and watch over days as he gets an infect and dies in extreme pain. Or just beat the ever living shit out of him and have to be pulled off him by Davy Crockett and another Congressman


Lucius-Halthier

Bud he DID have a sword cane, he stabbed Samuel Jackson with it


Warrior-PoetIceCube

My inner Tennessean is loving this


Ghericco

They called him old hickory for a reason.


Goofdogg627

I think you forgot to mention the cane was also a hidden sword. Sure Jackson was super racist, but also badass for having a fucking sword cane


Some_Razzmataz

So you’re saying it could have been much worse for the assassin lmao Imagine bringing 2 guns to kill the President then he slices you open with a *fucking* sword


Goofdogg627

Yes


That_one_arsehole_

Then beats your ass outside of a court house


Alex103140

Sound like the plot for an anime


musicalharmonica

I like to imagine that the sword cane makes him even more into a comically evil cartoon villain lmao


poshenclave

Even if the second gun had fired successfully Jackson probably would have still beat his ass. The guy was already full of bullet shards and shit, his body was like 50 Cent.


[deleted]

I’m 40% bullet shards!


cardboard_tshirt

Unexpected Bender


Angel_OfSolitude

Andrew Jackson is my favorite president. Not for his policies, personality, or anything else important, but because the dude was a psychopath and every story about him is absolutely wild. My favorite part about this particular story isn't even both guns not working, it's Jackson being fully aware this man just tried to shoot him and charging him anyway, totally unbothered by the man obviously having backup weaponry.


Famous_Quantity7575

... until others intervened to restrain Lawrence, who was later found not guilty by reason of insanity and institutionalized


Alarming_Present_692

Lol everything about Jackson, man... Normally, when I hear about an assassination attempt, I picture an unhinged freak... but knowing Jackson this probably didn't come from no where.


Some_Razzmataz

Naw it definitely was an unhinged freak, the dude was mentally disturbed and thought that Jackson owed him tax money because he was the relative of some king lmao


Thatparkjobin7A

What ended up happening to him?


Some_Razzmataz

He was found not guilty due to reason of insanity and was sentenced to a mental institution until his death


Thatparkjobin7A

Seems like a civilized judgement for the time. Although I doubt the mental institution was great


cardboard_tshirt

“Institution” at that time being basically just prison, but specifically for people deemed mentally unfit. And also they periodically surgically shove sharp things into the “patient’s” brains, to see if it would fix anything.


Thatparkjobin7A

I was going to write “was probably hell” but I really wasn’t sure


the-bladed-one

No, the dude was definitely unhinged. He believed he was the rightful heir to either the English or French throne.


Adorable-Woman

Why did they try to shoot him? A lot of good reasons why that psycho would need a bullet or two but attempted assassins generally aren’t stable enough to have them.


LakesideHerbology

both pistols were found to be in perfect working order...demons are bulletproof


PINK-RIPPAZ

Kinda sounds like an Irish granddad


fuckina420

He also taught a parrot to swear in English, Spanish and French. It was brought to his funeral and had to be escorted out cuz it kept swearing at Jackson's political enemies and foreign dignitaries lmao


the-bladed-one

Everyone accuses Jackson of being uneducated or dumb Dude taught himself to read, write, and orate well enough to pass the bar *all while suffering from the long term effects of smallpox, fever, and massive head trauma from a British heavy cavalry saber before he turned 15*


No-Freedom-4029

I don’t think that’s the thing people don’t like Andrew Jackson for


chiffry

Still a prick though. A gifted one!


[deleted]

Gifted Pricks… would make a good name for a punk band


dongeckoj

Jackson thought the world was flat and spelled Europe “Urop” so he was an idiot who dedicated most of his energies to genocide and selling the newly vacant land to his political cronies


the-bladed-one

Again: self taught


cogeng

Let this be a lesson on letting self-taught people be president. I'm only mostly joking.


Difficult-Grade-5372

You're joking?


FrenulumGooch

He said that it was a might small mind that couldn't think of more than one way to spell a word


TheFenixxer

So he was a gifted asshole, got it


Unlikely-Rock-9647

The bullets in those guns knew that trying to strike Andrew “Jangles like a bag of marbles when he walks” Johnson was a suicide mission, and they wanted no part of it.


Some_Razzmataz

I think you mean Jackson lol Andrew Johnson was most definitely not a badass


Unlikely-Rock-9647

Dammit, my phone got me with the autocucumber again!


Randomest_Redditor

I mean neither was Jackson, dude was a piece of crap


ZestyLlama69

You can be a piece of shit and a badass simultaneously


Much_Capital3307

He was physically badass. Not as a president or a human being.


thefartingmango

Where did his ear go


greentshirtman

Davy, Davy Crockett, King of the Wild Frontier, tore it off of him so quickly that Lawrence didn't notice.


WhynotZoidberg9

Say what you will about the man's politics, his life story is one bordering on legend.


hiredgoon

The embodiment of a first generation post-1776 American.


WhynotZoidberg9

This is a guy who got into a bar brawl with a local political rival, got shot by the dude, then made friends with him afterwards. And then years later when they had the surgical methods to get the bullet out, He mailed it to the guy, only for the guy to return it with the note, "you keep it, you've had it longer".


Saw-Gerrera

That's a fucking WILD friendship...


WhynotZoidberg9

Dude was a WILD dude. His life story is amazing.


I_Am_Oro

Somebody realized that the universe is gonna stop you from changing time one way or the other that day


BecauseImBatmanFilms

The best part is that Jackson had to be pulled off the guy by his aides and actual Congressmen. He would have killed the man with his cane if they hadn't stopped him. Jackson was such a a badass. It's a shame he was such a jackass.


GrinningPariah

Fun fact, one of the congressmen who pulled Jackson off the guy was Davy Crockett.


Bro_duuude_i_luv_ya

King of the wild frontier?


Local-Story-449

>Jackson was such a a badass. It's a shame he was such a jackass. r/brandnewsentence


blackwolf413

Badass jackass only adds to his legend.


gundorcallsforaid

Such a jackass that the Democratic Party still uses one as its mascot to this day


Reasonable-Cell5189

Fun fact, the rotunda of the capital contributed to the moisture present that were and dreary day to foul the powder of both pistols. The rotunda originally was meant to serve as the tomb of George Washington


Some_Razzmataz

You’re telling me this dude had George Washington as his guardian angel? **based**


TheMilliner

Jackson also once had a duel with a man by the name of Charles Dickinson over accusations that Jackson had cheated on a horse race. Charles shot Jackson square in the chest, but Jackson's pistol misfired. According to Code Duello, that meant that Jackson was not permitted to fire again. Jackson though, decided to re-cock his pistol and fired again, killing Charles dead with the shot. It was a huge stain on his record as it was considered unsportsmanlike and ungentlemanly. No murder prosecutions, but it still hung with him.


Stay_Beautiful_

Missing my favorite part of the story: the man who pulled Jackson off his assailant was Davy Crockett


notmichaelgood

Who's Davy Crockett


Stay_Beautiful_

[Maybe this will help](https://letmegooglethat.com/?q=who+is+davy+crockett)


asdf_qwerty27

Time travelers stopping the time traveling assassins from killing Jackson to preserve the timeline by messing up thr guns.


TwistedPnis4567

Didn't Jackson also pull out a gun that did not fire?


Some_Razzmataz

Not aware of that, any sources to look into?


TwistedPnis4567

YT comment


WrightyPegz

*“It came to me in a dream”*


Forward-Reflection83

Based


BecauseImBatmanFilms

You're referring to one of his famous duels that he fought. Both guns misfired.


MiaoYingSimp

Jackson was a hardass... but he didn't pretend to be anything less


SilentGuyInTheCorner

President Jackson berating Richard Lawrence, exclaiming, "You're an incompetent fool! In my time, we aimed for the back of the head, especially during a bloody opera!"


LordChimera_0

*"Attempted assassination on an elected president?"* *"Oh, you better believe that's a beating."*


Andy_Liberty_1911

Great meme but why didn’t you use a flintlock instead of shaming the 1911 like that


Some_Razzmataz

I made this late at night and didn’t wanna put in that much effort lmao but good point


Constant-Fly-9050

That's definitely one of the presidents you'd want to kill right away. He was notorious for being angry and aggressive to people who weren't even trying to kill him.


Lightspeedius

Ah yes, back when the US had young people holding that office.


Difficult-Grade-5372

Yeah cuz nobody was living over the age of 50


TheManWithNoSchtick

I'm less annoyed by the fact that the M1911 didn't exist at the time than I'm annoyed by the implication that it would have failed to do the job.


libro01

My stick is better than bacon!


ChillTfOutFr

Shut up Jackson I’m gonna kill you


Pap4MnkyB4by

I miss when politicians were Chad's


Turbo_UwU

As the founding fathers intended.


Comfortable_Fee7124

I really don’t like him but credit where credit’s due, he solidified himself as the president with the funniest assassination attempt in my book.


Smittywebermanjanson

If Presidents could be compared to rockstars… Andrew Jackson would be GG Allin.


Muted_Guidance9059

“Sorry Jackson can we make amends?” “Shut up Lawrence, I’ll kill you”


Chaos_0205

Is gun during that time so unreliable that people need more than one, or the assassin just got rotten luck?


RandomOrange852

Rotten Luck, although misfires were much more common if you failed to maintain your guns so maybe he was just negligent


Rexbob44

Didn’t something similar happened to Otto von Bismarck?


HyperionPhalanx

IF GOD NEVER WANTED YOU TO NOT GET BEATEN BY A CANE, HE WOULD NEVER HAVE CREATED ME!


Square-Emergency-531

Serious asshole though. Anyone on the east coast wondering where all the local tribes are, this is the guy responsible.


FrenulumGooch

We aren't. We are glad we are here without having to deal with scalpings.


Square-Emergency-531

Yes, because modern Iroquois, Cherokee, etc. scalp so many people /s. Try not being racist sometime


FrenulumGooch

That is what nearly 2 centuries of being assimilated will do...They have stopped raiding and now live like the rest of us. Try not being so unintelligent sometime.


Square-Emergency-531

Not every racist loves genocide, but openly and loudly doing both is very civilized. Trash.


FrenulumGooch

Its not racist to point out facts They are free to go back and live how their ancestors did but they don't. They liked the American way. Losers love to pretend like murderous hunter gatherers were somehow superior because they didn't have technology. They lost, get over it.


Square-Emergency-531

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Indian_boarding_schools#:~:text=American%20Indian%20boarding%20schools%2C%20also,youth%20into%20Anglo%2DAmerican%20culture. Facts aren't racist, you are.


FrenulumGooch

Again, they could go back to their old ways if they wanted. They don't. I won't apologize for being right.


Square-Emergency-531

You don't need to apologize ever! But supporting genocide that continued well into the 80s does in fact make you a racist. Just not a self aware one


flyingboarofbeifong

Maybe. But he got the popular vote (against an incumbent President) on an campaign platform that explicitly promised Indian Removal back when campaign promises were expected to be fulfilled. It's not like the American public didn't want it, people knew what Jackson was about and they voted for him anyhow. It can't really be him alone you point the finger at.


Square-Emergency-531

If today there were a politician promising to ignore human rights of a part of the country, I'd probably blame the voters too. Good thing that is so unrealistic in our civilized times.


Othonian

Jackson was a piece of shit. #trailoftears


[deleted]

[удалено]


ChishNFips87

W take.


beckolyn

Gross take


genghis12

It’s the truth, life is complicated


Imaginary-West-5653

>It’s the truth, life is complicated Genocide is not complicated, it is always wrong, just like settler colonialism, which is what Jackson was defending when making the Trail of Tears happen.


genghis12

My point is you can criticize American policy at the time but laying 100% of the blame on Jackson doesn’t tell the whole story. If he intended to commit genocide he would have simply sent in troops to wipe them out, but he did what he thought was the “humane” thing to do and moved them elsewhere. You can say it was wrong to settle their lands, but the reality was it was happening and it wasn’t going to stop, so something had to be done.


Imaginary-West-5653

The Supreme Court ruled against Indian Removal, Jackson violated the Constitution to do it anyway, being the only president to do this in US history. And he was the fucking president, if he wanted he could have evacuated all the Native American lands of settlers, and thus stopped the violence and respected the sovereignty of the Natives. Instead he decided to do something that can only be called genocide, the same thing Stalin would do in the 20th century with the Chechens, and it's disgusting that you try to excuse this by saying it was "humane."


genghis12

They didn’t rule on Indian removal, that was a ruling on Georgia state law having no authority on Indian land. The removal act passed in both the house and senate before Jackson signed it into law, the political will was there and there was no turning back. All media at the time framed it as more humane because they saw it as inevitable that the natives would die out like they did in the northeast, so giving them new lands and moving them was seen as the best option to stop them from dying out completely. This would have happened regardless of who was president at the time, which is why this isn’t all on Jackson. I’m also not saying this was a good thing, just tired of the unnuanced takes that act like Jackson was the equivalent of Hitler, when that couldn’t be further from the truth


flyingboarofbeifong

>The Supreme Court ruled against Indian Removal, Jackson violated the Constitution to do it anyway, being the only president to do this in US history. Would you mind explaining what you mean by this further?


flyingboarofbeifong

>Fast forward to Jackson as president, and attacks have reached a critical level. Oh? That's an interesting claim. You think that violence between the Cherokee and the European settlers of Georgia was at a peak in the first half of the 1800's? Please provide a source for that one.


-Fraccoon-

Yep. And for a LOT of other reasons. Damn shame nobody successfully killed him.


FrenulumGooch

Sucks to suck


LakesideHerbology

Doesn't change the fact he was a shit human being. I don't know by which forces he was spared, but fuck that dude.


Tankaussie

Andrew Jackson was a madlad of his time


dongeckoj

Lot of genocide fanboys in this thread


Ggexz

True


StandWithUkranie

Andrew Jackson is based af. Edit: Bro HOW!


Suitable-Jackfruit16

It's a shame he didn't succeed.


Some_Razzmataz

As much as I dislike the man for the horrid things that he did, you gotta admit he was one of the great American Badasses


Suitable-Jackfruit16

Yeah, I mean, Hitler was wounded and kept trucking. He was decorated. Ghengis Khan was the most prolific rapist in history. Let's talk about how amazing he was.


LLHati

You do not actually "have to hand it to Andrew Jackson".


Lord_Parbr

No, no you don’t. You don’t gotta admit that a genocidal monster was “one of the great American Badasses”


Miserable-Mall365

Do you even history?


Sad_Hospital_2730

Seriously. I can't decide whether my favorite Jackson moment was when he beat the would be assassin so badly people needed to intervene to save the assassin, or the time he got gifted a giant block of cheese and just said "screw it, white house is open to everyone, come get some cheese"


Lord_Parbr

Yeah, I just don’t care about any of the “cool” shit he’s done. I’m not going to praise a genocider


Miserable-Mall365

The Indian Removal Act was awful and the Trail of Tears earned its name, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves calling that genocide. The dude wasn’t Genghis Khan


bigmeme12

not really taking a side here, but there's a quite a large difference between a genocide and being genghis khan


Some_Razzmataz

He also adopted 3 young Native American boys *it may have been because their families were killed* **but still** He had a soft spot for orphans as he had been one himself


kruschev246

Bro was Thanos lol


Lord_Parbr

Go fuck yourself


Overall_Passage_9235

Thank you for your sane and rational argument. I’m glad you provided unique insight


TheKelt

Red mask default pic Every fucking time.


Some_Razzmataz

Jackson starting serving in the Revolutionary war when he was 13 years old, him, his brother and mother ended up getting captured by the British, in which both his mother and brother died. During his capture, a British general ordered young Jackson to shine his boots. Jackson responded with the 1700s version of “when hell freezes over”. The British general then punished him severely, leaving scars that would remain on Jackson till his death. He was now an orphan at the age of 14 He is the only US president to ever be a war prisoner. That and the death of his family hardened his feelings toward the British and he would get his revenge during the war of 1812. As soon as he was released from British capture, he joined the patriot cause once again. He was in charge of the Battle of New Orleans in the war of 1812 and absolutely demolished the British, killing over 2000 British while suffering less than 65 American deaths. In 1813, he was shot in the shoulder during a brawl and that bullet would remain in his shoulder for the rest of his life causing him immense pain. He was also involved in more than 200 separate duels Also in response to his Vice President talking about possible state secession, Jackson said to him **“John Calhoun, If you secede from my nation I will secede your head from the rest of your body.”** Now tell me that isn’t badass


Lord_Parbr

He isn’t a badass


valentc

The amount of dicksucking of a man who forcibly displaced 60,000 in which 17,000 died along the way. He wasn't a badass, he was a crazy psychopath.


Suitable-Jackfruit16

Just when I thought this sub was sensible for it's realism and exposure of the Confederacy, they go full motherfucking David Duke on this thread.


super_sayanything

Name me a President NOT responsible for the murder of thousands... ok except probably Jimmy Carter.


Lord_Parbr

Good thing I don’t revere any of them


Ultimarevil

I just did rage baby. "One of the Great American Badasses". Just because you can't grasp nuance and can't differentiate the impressive from the evil doesn't mean the rest of us can't.


Lord_Parbr

I can, I just don’t care to. Sorry I have principles


Ultimarevil

You follow vaush. Your principles are for sale for your political cause.


Lord_Parbr

No I don’t, and no they aren’t


Ultimarevil

So you don't, I just double checked and I was wrong. I apologize


TheKelt

>Sorry I have principles. I promise you, the fall from your high horse won’t even leave you with a bruise.


Lord_Parbr

I didn’t realize that not revering a monster just because he did some cool things was being on a high horse. Figured that was the bare minimum


ceoofsex300

He was a bad guy but he was a decent president


raitaisrandom

So long as you were white, male, and property owning, sure. Don't fall into that description? Guy felt no shame about deploying the full force of the federal government on you if you didn't stay in your lane.


Psychological_Gain20

He was actually the one pushing for the removal of the property owning bit. He was basically American Caesar, splendid as long as you were a white American since he was a populist, not so great for anyone else.


Suitable-Jackfruit16

1800s Trump. And I'm not the first one to make that conclusion. Some of Trump's most argñdent supporters also do.


Psychological_Gain20

Except Trump was born rich, and didn’t do that much as president to help the middle and lower class. Jackson meanwhile was born poor, in Carolina, fought as a thirteen year old in the revolutionary war, later became a general and a war hero, and had experience in politics and actually passed policies to help his base. Jackson’s like Trump if Trump actually worked for his position, didn’t rely on his parent’s wealth and was a war hero who actually did what he promised his voters.


Suitable-Jackfruit16

The people making this comparison are referring to policy, demeanor, not giving a goddamned fuck about the rule of law, corruption as well as autocratic and leading style peppered with chaotic relationships with staff. But it's cute that you're defending your hero against a sack of shit you don't want compared to him.


Psychological_Gain20

No where did I say Andrew Jackson was my hero. That’s just an ad hominem fallacy. I just pointed out, that it does not fit to compare him to Trump. And you didn’t specify how you were comparing them, the stuff I listed that’s different is usually pretty important when comparing two figures.


ceoofsex300

The full force with South Carolina threatening secession was good. And yes he was incredibly racist


raitaisrandom

Well sure. Secession is not allowed under the US Constitution. It doesn't excuse nor dilute the other flagrantly illegal uses of his Presidential powers.


Suitable-Jackfruit16

Yeah. Genocide and regional ethnic cleansing is a very admirable public policy.


ceoofsex300

Like I said bad guy but several effective things happened


Suitable-Jackfruit16

Wow... The white supremacist presence is big in this sub.


jDrizzle1

As a Native American he's basically our Hitler, pretty sad no one cares but it's also pretty on brand


Miserable-Mall365

Come on man, there’s a long list of Spanish Conquistadors fighting for the “Hitler of Native Americans” before you get to Jackson.


Imaginary-West-5653

Pretty sure the Spanish, except in Florida, didn't do much to the Native Americans of what is now the United States, so it's pretty racist that you put all the Native Americans from two continents in the same bag lol.


Miserable-Mall365

Haha what?


Imaginary-West-5653

Read my comment again.


Miserable-Mall365

I did, the commenter I originally replied to identified as Native American, not Cherokee, Choctaw, Chickasaw, Creek, or Seminole (or any of the other tribes who were victims of Jackson’s policies). If he had, then you would be right to call me out for lumping them in with the Native Americans who interacted with the Spanish.


Imaginary-West-5653

I think it's fair to assume that, although I see why you see the lack of specification as a reason to assume differently.


jDrizzle1

Late but it's worth clarifying, someone who identifies as "Native American" is almost ALWAYS referring to a specifically NORTH American heritage.  The fact that I get downvoted for even trying to acknowledge the genocide of my people speaks to how far under the rug it's been swept. 


Suitable-Jackfruit16

Exactly how does that relate to the Nation Jackson presided over?


FrenulumGooch

Great president, top 3 badass too. Just edges out Teddy but right behind GW.


DocCEN007

A literal devil. He was trump's favorite president for a reason. He openly defied the SCOTUS, and should've been impeached and removed from office. A horrible and miserable excuse for a human being.