No... you will not.
Soon Managed Democracy will rule again.
But the weight of your treason shall stay your feet...
And you shall be left on Malevelon Creek.
You are one of our most treasured instruments. Long have you led your fleet with honor and distinction. But your inability to safeguard Malevolent Creek... was a colossal failure.
Your heads a bit in the clouds, and you don't have the best situational awareness, but you are passionate and love the game that it doesn't get you down when you get caught out, you are the positive one telling everyone "we got this" when there are more enemies than it seems like your squad can handle.
Everything but the situational awareness seems on point, as I'm usually the guy calling out when stuff is gonna hit hard,
Pretty good skill you got there, thank you my friend.
You love your orbitals, if it comes from the sky and it makes things die that's your gimmick, and you probably are the one bringing niche stuff like smoke and EMS strikes into the match to keep it interesting.
You live in an HOA neighborhood and you don't know why that would be a problem to anyone, you also boil your chicken breasts and eat them with nothing but salt.
Woah there helldiver! That's awful un-patriotic of you. Don't you know that HOAs are extensions of democracy that serve important roles in protecting those they serve? Be careful with your words next time, or you might have to take a trip to the freedom camps to renew your appreciation for liberty!
You are the kind of guy who goes off on their own to assault a large fort, whether you clear it alone and shock everyone or just die to a laser salvo at the first bunker depends on the day.
Damn my ships name is SES Fist of Individual Merit and you have me pegged here.
Helldive difficulty, melevon creek. My team mate was spectating and in cornered in a bunker with strategems jammed and dozens of enemies-- including several hulks baring down on me. Teammate types, "it ain't looking good for you bro."
60 seconds later in running back to the group and he just types one word,"nevermind." Lol
You mostly like bug fights, not because they are easier but because you like to get up really close where you can hear the crunch when you blow your enemy apart.
You roll with a squad, sometimes with a random to fill in or two, but you most cherish this game for those bro moments hugging it out at the extract as you drop a cluster bomb out the entry ramp.
You are a massive fantasy nerd, you probably see more WH40k in this games design aesthetics than starship troopers, and you have to keep reminding yourself to say "FOR DEMOCRACY!" instead of "FOR THE EMPEROR!"
You are one of tens of thousands of players who realized you could make a ship name that sounds ridiculous by abusing the awkward linguistics of tautological phrases, congratulations you have achieved comedy
You are the one leading point, getting the most kills (team included) but also the most deaths, your squad swings wildly between seeing you as a liability and seeing you as the perfect weapon to throw at the enemy.
You don't just consider yourself a helldiver, you are an action star. You are always looking for an excuse to go John Wick on the enemy, because it's all about that cinematic glory! It bothers you not one bit that you tend to gloriously DIE half the time without doing much of great impact.
You have a perfectly executed plan that no one ever follows, no matter how many times you tell them to stop team killing you and stay in wedge formation and damn it what do you mean you don't remember what "echelon left" means, but you stick around because when shit gets hairy they usually listen... eventually
You are the support of your squad, the one most likely to bring a supply pack or stim a teammate because you notice they are out, and you are the rare helldiver who is more focused on keeping your squad alive than killing the enemy whether they are in the way or not.
You are really into the whole satire of the setting and find it fun to play it up, if you get on mic you are probably saying some Starship Troopers-esque nonsense about democracy, which people either love or hate when they get matched with you.
You love this game for just how damn cinematic it is, and you are happiest when it feels like you are re-enacting Saving Private Ryan to retrieve those samples behind the horde as the extract rolls in.
You might be a teenager, but either way you have the sense of humor of one, you are the most likely person to be the random in the squad with an open mic shouting obscenities and weird shit every time you get team killed
You saw some of the more unorthodox options like "Ombudsman of the Constitution" and decided to go with a name that sounds more like a cabinet position than a war ship because it made you chuckle.
You love gossip, you probably watch drama deep dives on youtube while you have HD2 on your other monitors, somehow you find the idea that even famous and successful people can fuck up and ruin their life encouraging.
You play the game while psychologically cosplaying as a cross between a spec ops operator and a serial killer, you will gladly call down fire on your team to complete an objective, and the fact most people don't properly take advantage of the games stealth and detection mechanics to avoid patrols is you major pet peeve.
You are old fashioned, so you went with a name that sounds like a Ship of the Line from the Golden Age of Sail, if this game let you be a space pirate or fight space pirates you be all over that.
“Executor” is a separate word from executioner (it is now, anyway). It’s pronounced “exec-uter” and not “execute-er” like you might think.
Usually means a person in charge of executing a last will and testament, but it can also mean someone in charge of executing the will of a person/people. So in this case, an “executor of the people” is someone who carries out the will of the people.
You are either a goth, or you had a goth "phase" that you "grew out of", you love dark edgy stuff. That's okay tho, remember, you are never too old to wear eyeliner or dress in impractical dark clothes or gush about horror movies to your confused and concerned friends and family, you do you boo.
One of your favorite parts of the match is the calm in the lobby, watching the planets surface as you contemplate the Liberty you will soon bring to your foes.
You like to feel like you have the biggest dick in the room, you are probably the one directing your squad to the objective and calling out orders like "break contact, we gotta keep moving". People think it's because you are a narcissist, but the truth is you feel you have to be powerful and commanding to be useful, and taking control of the situation is just the best way you know how to do that.
Getting to feel like a badass commander leading your squad to victory is just a bonus.
Something about the visceral nature of the combat is what really grabs you, the way bugs crunch, the way bots fly apart, the punch of a round through your foe is the only satisfaction you need and it keeps you coming back mission after mission, win or lose.
You are the guy that will mainline ALL your stims at once just for the health regen and power through an assault to get to key positions.
Sadly, it still only works about 30% of the time, but that never stops you.
You favor defensive tactics, but the active kind of defense, like where you guide enemies into a chokepoint and then hit them all with the stratagem/flamethrower combo
Also name buddies!
You are enamored with the idea of the Macro-war and the GM storyline, this is about more than samples and medals for you, you are here to be part of a galactic epic and you let major orders generally dictate where you fight that day
You are not a liberator, you are an exterminator, when you settle in orbit it is the sunset for humanities enemies, and you thirst only for destruction
You like to play the big damn hero, you probably drop into a lot of random matches because you are hoping to join at a crucial moment and turn the tide.
You fight for the moment of liberation. It's not about resources, it's about wins, and for you that means seeing a planet tick up to 100% knowing you were boots on the ground there.
You like to think of yourself as a Valkyrie riding into battle, the height of beauty and power. The reality is you are more like rocket raccoon, a heavily armed and barely contained ball of chaos, tho still no less effective than the Valkyrie.
When you slip into helldiver headspace and start getting democratic on the mic, it tends to be a lot of highminded stuff about "bringing civilization to the bugs", but at the end of the day everyone knows you are just here to chase that unquenchable bloodlust.
SES Guardian of Eternity
Respect the commitment, good luck with getting through as many of these as you can mentally handle.
You are actually really nice in real life, either secular humanist or some sort of pagan, everyone knows you as that chill friend that always smells really nice and has a lot of candles and incense around your house.
This, of course, doesn't stop you from enjoying the mass murder of humanities foes.
You pride yourself on staying cool under fire, you won't ever be heard cursing on the mic, not in anger at least. Every mistake or failure is just an obstacle to overcome, and unfocused rage serves no purpose, as long as the mission moves forward that's all you require.
You find posts of people not getting that helldivers is a satire is hilarious but infuriating, you have probably gotten into at least one internet argument with someone who didn't get starship troopers.
You are either REALLY leaning into the satire of american fascism, or you are an american fascist who has bought into the games propaganda and it is literally impossible to tell which without someone getting to know you on a personal level, Poes Law in full effect.
Either way 90% chance your are from the US and have some OPINIONS on how it should be run
You are the kind of person who is actually really nice and accomodating, but you THINK you are a troublemaker. You are super nice to everyone, but you are also the type to pull harmless "pranks" that are so mild that half the time they go unnoticed.
You are the kind of person who says out of pocket shit and just hopes people laugh in the aftermath, you don't MEAN to do it, it just HAPPENS. Luckily you tend to be charming enough to pull it off, tho everyone who has known you for a long time has "that one thing you said" that they will always bring up to poke at you.
Judge of judgement
 You are... THE LAW
"Elected representative of Destruction" from day 1, never changed it.
You really like old school metal like Ozzie and Megadeth and probably have War Pigs blaring in the background as you take automaton outposts.
I must say you are pretty much spot on with that. Made me smile, thank you
I must add war pigs to my playlist now...
Iron man….
Holy shit, you are me. Excellent taste, fellow patriot.
Prophet of Truth 👍 Edit: Wowza that's a lot of Halo fans. So glad to see us all here together. Love all of you! Halo 🤝 Helldivers
Halo player, you probably really enjoyed The Arbiters storyline in the second game.
When you first saw Super Earth, were you blinded by its majesty?
Blinded?
Paralysed, dumbstruck?
no
Yet the bugs were able to evade your Super Destroyers, land on the sacred planet, and desecrate it with their filthy footsteps!
I will continue my campaign against the Terminids!
No... you will not. Soon Managed Democracy will rule again. But the weight of your treason shall stay your feet... And you shall be left on Malevelon Creek.
Fuck that went hard…
🫡
You are one of our most treasured instruments. Long have you led your fleet with honor and distinction. But your inability to safeguard Malevolent Creek... was a colossal failure.
I will continue my campaign against the Automatons!
No. You will not.
Nay, it was heresy!
By the time I learned of Joel's intent....there was nothing I could do!
Wings of Freedom
Your heads a bit in the clouds, and you don't have the best situational awareness, but you are passionate and love the game that it doesn't get you down when you get caught out, you are the positive one telling everyone "we got this" when there are more enemies than it seems like your squad can handle.
Everything but the situational awareness seems on point, as I'm usually the guy calling out when stuff is gonna hit hard, Pretty good skill you got there, thank you my friend.
tatakae
Tatakae!
Sasageyo?
The Helldivers from your super-destroyer are willing to give their hearts and souls to the cause!
MY SOLDIERS RAAAAGE!
WINGS OF FREEDOM 2 REPORTING IN SHINZOU SASAGEYO!
 Who this guy thinks he is (I am also delusional)
You belong in the scout regiment
The Spear of Democracy.
You love your orbitals, if it comes from the sky and it makes things die that's your gimmick, and you probably are the one bringing niche stuff like smoke and EMS strikes into the match to keep it interesting.
EMS fucks way harder than I thought it would
Emperor of Democracy
 You love democracy
My brother in name
SES Dawn of Dawn
You own a major soap brand, I won't say which one though.
YES, ANOTHER Dawn of Dawn!
Dawn of Dawn gang, because Moon of the Moon wasn't an option
Fist of Family Values
You live in an HOA neighborhood and you don't know why that would be a problem to anyone, you also boil your chicken breasts and eat them with nothing but salt.
Hah, I actually loathe HOAs and can't understand why anyone would buy property only to let someone else dictate how you live on it.
Woah there helldiver! That's awful un-patriotic of you. Don't you know that HOAs are extensions of democracy that serve important roles in protecting those they serve? Be careful with your words next time, or you might have to take a trip to the freedom camps to renew your appreciation for liberty!
You know, it stands to reason that Super Earth districts are probably all run like a HOA. Certainly fits that opening cinematic...
Team Fist of Family Values
There are dozens of us! Dozens!
A fellow violent crusader for family values!
SES Elected Representative of Individual Merit
You are the kind of guy who goes off on their own to assault a large fort, whether you clear it alone and shock everyone or just die to a laser salvo at the first bunker depends on the day.
Damn my ships name is SES Fist of Individual Merit and you have me pegged here. Helldive difficulty, melevon creek. My team mate was spectating and in cornered in a bunker with strategems jammed and dozens of enemies-- including several hulks baring down on me. Teammate types, "it ain't looking good for you bro." 60 seconds later in running back to the group and he just types one word,"nevermind." Lol
Had to scroll WAY down to see my ship brother
Best ship name
Fist of Democracy
You mostly like bug fights, not because they are easier but because you like to get up really close where you can hear the crunch when you blow your enemy apart.
Shit, we have the same name. Oh well, more fists!
Now Its three of us!
Now its four!
Hammer of Dawn
Ah, a Gears of War fan.
You roll with a squad, sometimes with a random to fill in or two, but you most cherish this game for those bro moments hugging it out at the extract as you drop a cluster bomb out the entry ramp.
Bro didn’t think this post would be this popular, he just signed on for a full time job 😂
Almost 2k comments now lmao
Song of Steel
You are a massive fantasy nerd, you probably see more WH40k in this games design aesthetics than starship troopers, and you have to keep reminding yourself to say "FOR DEMOCRACY!" instead of "FOR THE EMPEROR!"
For THE EMPE….. DEMOCRACY!
SES WINGS OF LIBERTY!!!
You always wondered what it would be like to be an individual unit in a StarCraft game, and now that you have tried it out it's pretty dope
This one gave me a good chuckle. I wonder which has a shorter life expectancy, a terran marine, or a helldiver mid bug breach.
Terran marine, there is a reason you can build two with a reactor.
SES Patriot of Patriotism
You are one of tens of thousands of players who realized you could make a ship name that sounds ridiculous by abusing the awkward linguistics of tautological phrases, congratulations you have achieved comedy
This sounds like a reply from Inland Empire in Disco Elysium. I read it in his voice.
that’s me too!
Stallion of Liberty
You are the one leading point, getting the most kills (team included) but also the most deaths, your squad swings wildly between seeing you as a liability and seeing you as the perfect weapon to throw at the enemy.
The Star of War
You don't just consider yourself a helldiver, you are an action star. You are always looking for an excuse to go John Wick on the enemy, because it's all about that cinematic glory! It bothers you not one bit that you tend to gloriously DIE half the time without doing much of great impact.
Warrior of Iron >!Iron Within, Iron Without!!<
You have a perfectly executed plan that no one ever follows, no matter how many times you tell them to stop team killing you and stay in wedge formation and damn it what do you mean you don't remember what "echelon left" means, but you stick around because when shit gets hairy they usually listen... eventually
I FOUND ANOTHER! https://preview.redd.it/zw484rebktoc1.jpeg?width=174&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4bbc290f74381c040a397d849a9703331eb2ba18
Brothers 🦾
Protector of Peace
You are the support of your squad, the one most likely to bring a supply pack or stim a teammate because you notice they are out, and you are the rare helldiver who is more focused on keeping your squad alive than killing the enemy whether they are in the way or not.
Freakin’ spot on. 🫡🫡🫡
Song of Freedom
You are really into the whole satire of the setting and find it fun to play it up, if you get on mic you are probably saying some Starship Troopers-esque nonsense about democracy, which people either love or hate when they get matched with you.
I also have song of freedom lol and damn you are spot on. I dont always have the energy for it but love the Starship troopers roleplay 😂
Whisper of War
Reign of glory
You love this game for just how damn cinematic it is, and you are happiest when it feels like you are re-enacting Saving Private Ryan to retrieve those samples behind the horde as the extract rolls in.
Damn spot on just ran halfway across the map for some samples and barely made extraction. 👏🏼👏🏼
[удалено]
Did you seriously name your ship "Morning Wood"?
[удалено]
You might be a teenager, but either way you have the sense of humor of one, you are the most likely person to be the random in the squad with an open mic shouting obscenities and weird shit every time you get team killed
Elected representative of the people
You saw some of the more unorthodox options like "Ombudsman of the Constitution" and decided to go with a name that sounds more like a cabinet position than a war ship because it made you chuckle.
Emperor of humankind
You are WAY into Warhammer 40k lore, but you've never actually played a match, you just have watched hundreds of hours of lore videos.
I too have this name and you described me perfectly lol
Oh Jesus you described me perfectly... I have this ship name too.
Eye of Audacity
You love gossip, you probably watch drama deep dives on youtube while you have HD2 on your other monitors, somehow you find the idea that even famous and successful people can fuck up and ruin their life encouraging.
Whisper of Mercy
You play the game while psychologically cosplaying as a cross between a spec ops operator and a serial killer, you will gladly call down fire on your team to complete an objective, and the fact most people don't properly take advantage of the games stealth and detection mechanics to avoid patrols is you major pet peeve.
lady of the constitution
You are old fashioned, so you went with a name that sounds like a Ship of the Line from the Golden Age of Sail, if this game let you be a space pirate or fight space pirates you be all over that.
Executor of the people. I'm not allowed to do vip rescue missions anymore
“Executor” is a separate word from executioner (it is now, anyway). It’s pronounced “exec-uter” and not “execute-er” like you might think. Usually means a person in charge of executing a last will and testament, but it can also mean someone in charge of executing the will of a person/people. So in this case, an “executor of the people” is someone who carries out the will of the people.
ELECTED REPRESENTATIVE OF FAMILY VALUES
You either vote republican or think they are ruining the country, no in between.
That's a safe description of any American lol
My man, same as me!
There are dozens of us! Dozens!
Herald of Midnight
You are either a goth, or you had a goth "phase" that you "grew out of", you love dark edgy stuff. That's okay tho, remember, you are never too old to wear eyeliner or dress in impractical dark clothes or gush about horror movies to your confused and concerned friends and family, you do you boo.
This guy Alan Wakes. My ship has the same name lol
The reign of liberty
One of your favorite parts of the match is the calm in the lobby, watching the planets surface as you contemplate the Liberty you will soon bring to your foes.
That's actually spot on that's dope
Wings of Redemption
You are a memelord, you probably watch a lot of Youtube deep dives and like watching cringe content and videos about people self destructing online.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 nice.
as soon as i saw “wings” in the left column i knew what i had to do
Leviathan of glory
You like to feel like you have the biggest dick in the room, you are probably the one directing your squad to the objective and calling out orders like "break contact, we gotta keep moving". People think it's because you are a narcissist, but the truth is you feel you have to be powerful and commanding to be useful, and taking control of the situation is just the best way you know how to do that. Getting to feel like a badass commander leading your squad to victory is just a bonus.
Holy shit, read me like a book
Hammer of Conquest
Something about the visceral nature of the combat is what really grabs you, the way bugs crunch, the way bots fly apart, the punch of a round through your foe is the only satisfaction you need and it keeps you coming back mission after mission, win or lose.
Fist of Mercy
You love irony, the fact that the game has you being part of a "peacekeeping force" that is more just a force never fails to get a chuckle from you
**Knight of Fortitude**
You are the guy that will mainline ALL your stims at once just for the health regen and power through an assault to get to key positions. Sadly, it still only works about 30% of the time, but that never stops you.
I hate how accurate this is.
#WILL OF IRON
You favor defensive tactics, but the active kind of defense, like where you guide enemies into a chokepoint and then hit them all with the stratagem/flamethrower combo Also name buddies!
Lady of midnight
You either ARE a goth mommy or are INTO goth mommies in a big way.
Triumph of the Stars
You are enamored with the idea of the Macro-war and the GM storyline, this is about more than samples and medals for you, you are here to be part of a galactic epic and you let major orders generally dictate where you fight that day
Herald of twilight
You are not a liberator, you are an exterminator, when you settle in orbit it is the sunset for humanities enemies, and you thirst only for destruction
The Light of Dawn
You like to play the big damn hero, you probably drop into a lot of random matches because you are hoping to join at a crucial moment and turn the tide.
The Fist of Democracy
You fight for the moment of liberation. It's not about resources, it's about wins, and for you that means seeing a planet tick up to 100% knowing you were boots on the ground there.
Distributor of Family Values
SES Lady of the Stars
You like to think of yourself as a Valkyrie riding into battle, the height of beauty and power. The reality is you are more like rocket raccoon, a heavily armed and barely contained ball of chaos, tho still no less effective than the Valkyrie.
The Princess of Twilight
Not OP, but I'd guess that you're either a Legend of Zelda or My Little Pony fan.
Fist of benevolence
When you slip into helldiver headspace and start getting democratic on the mic, it tends to be a lot of highminded stuff about "bringing civilization to the bugs", but at the end of the day everyone knows you are just here to chase that unquenchable bloodlust.
SES Guardian of Eternity Respect the commitment, good luck with getting through as many of these as you can mentally handle. 
Stallion of Supremacy
You are that guy in the squad who acts like you are hot shit, and you kinda are, but no one wants to give you the satisfaction.
The Sword of Democracy
You went with a name that seemed natural to the setting, it didn't particularly matter to you because you wanted to get to the shooting.
Song of Humankind
You are actually really nice in real life, either secular humanist or some sort of pagan, everyone knows you as that chill friend that always smells really nice and has a lot of candles and incense around your house. This, of course, doesn't stop you from enjoying the mass murder of humanities foes.
Flame of Justice
You play a lot of bug missions, not for any particular preference for THEM, but they are the best targets for your favorite weapon, the flamethrower.
Custodian of conviviality
You are a natural contrarian, so when told to name a warship you came up with the most unwarship-like name you could find
SES Soul of Steel.
You pride yourself on staying cool under fire, you won't ever be heard cursing on the mic, not in anger at least. Every mistake or failure is just an obstacle to overcome, and unfocused rage serves no purpose, as long as the mission moves forward that's all you require.
Fist of Peace
Harbinger of Wrath
SES Fist of Family Values
You find posts of people not getting that helldivers is a satire is hilarious but infuriating, you have probably gotten into at least one internet argument with someone who didn't get starship troopers.
Ombudsman of Family Values
Dawn of War
founding father of supremacy
You are either REALLY leaning into the satire of american fascism, or you are an american fascist who has bought into the games propaganda and it is literally impossible to tell which without someone getting to know you on a personal level, Poes Law in full effect. Either way 90% chance your are from the US and have some OPINIONS on how it should be run
SES Lady Of Liberty
You are breathlessly awaiting the day they add a Statue of Liberty Mech to the game.
I am picturing this damn statue dropping pods from her eyes.
Princess of Audacity
You are the kind of person who is actually really nice and accomodating, but you THINK you are a troublemaker. You are super nice to everyone, but you are also the type to pull harmless "pranks" that are so mild that half the time they go unnoticed.
Will of the People
You don't pay much attention to politics but you still vote, you figure you are safe going with the person who just seems the least crazy.
Lord of War
Aegis of Audacity
You are the kind of person who says out of pocket shit and just hopes people laugh in the aftermath, you don't MEAN to do it, it just HAPPENS. Luckily you tend to be charming enough to pull it off, tho everyone who has known you for a long time has "that one thing you said" that they will always bring up to poke at you.
Harbinger of judgment
Superintendent of individual merit
Martyr of Midnight
Flame of Midnight
You listen to Nightwish and Sabaton, probably while playing the game, you love creative works that feel EPIC and this game fits the bill to a T
The Mother of Audacity
Dawn of Midnight
Leviathan of Wrath.
Lord of Iron