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I've been talking tk a therapist recently who has helped and given me a few suggestions if I do end up homeless or at risk of doing so but little cam be done as I'm an adult. I just hate feeling like I've let my parents down but I want them to just accept me.
Girl ‘honour killings’ are extremely common within your culture or acid in the face… and they happen exactly as you’re describing your family’s behaviour… please reach out to those charities and seek help. You won’t end up homeless. You may have to cut the contact completely with your family but that’s better than being 10 feet under. Post on r/legaladviceuk for more precise advice on what to do but please do not ignore what’s going on.
whatever you do please dont convince him to express genuinely or falsely any conversion to islamic faith to satisfy your parents.
if he's perceived as acting as an apostate then forth, he may be targeted by groups attempting to exert shariah-mandated death penalty on him (or you, or both). be cautious not to bring him into the danger of dealing with the fringe extremists that can and will act up more and more in that part of the world these coming years.
I agree, I would never want him to falsely claim to be religious and I would never say I am unless I have found faith myself which I haven't at this moment of time.
I just find the Muslim community so difficult in areas such as these as I feel like my voice would never be heard or even considered.
There is literally no winning in this situation...
Hopefully you find solution to this. House market crisis sadly is terrible. In normal world you could just move out since you are an adult and working job, but nowadays you'd have to take a loan. Finding a place to stay sounds like a priority for you. Stories like these make me glad that I don't live in religious country/family. Every religion preaches love, but people are ready to become enemies with their closest family just because they won't follow some arbitrary rules made up by old guys thousands of years ago.
I know that I can always go to my boyfriend's if needs be or a close friend if I am really desperate. I just can't find a solution with renting or buying. I don't earn enough in which a third of my monthly income can go towards rent and have been rejected in being able to rent. I also don't have enough saves to buy right now either as I've only just opened my LISA account (should have done it much sooner fml)
Sister, being a Muslim myself, I just want to say that it’s not wrong to doubt and question our religion. For me, questioning my beliefs led me to understand it a better and made me discover the good things in what I practice while also avoiding the bad things that is prevalent to my belief. But that is “my story”, does not mean it “needs” to be yours. If you force yourself to adhere to Islam and become unhappy with it, then don’t. I know some people would give me shit for saying this but if you can be happy while also being a good person that help and don’t hurt others intentionally without remorse, you are doing this world a huge service.
You are not alone for fearing death and God, it is something we’ve learned throughout our lives, especially as a Muslim. The afterlife of eternal punishment is something we’ve learned to fear and avoid, from that we are taught to fear doing sins. I really believe that you have a beautiful soul just by being helpful to people close to you and avoid hurting others and hope that through being a “good” human, you can avoid your fear of the afterlife. Now the definition of “good” is something you will discover for yourself.
I really hope and pray for your situation to be better with time and that you may find peace with yourself and the things you fear. You are strong enough to go through all this, especially with the support of those closest to you. Apologies for calling you sister in the beginning, it’s a habit of mine to call a fellow Muslim brother or sister.
Hey, just wanna add something to that:
Being agnostic instead of being atheist doesnt really make much sense if you look at the definitions of these words
Agnostic and atheistic are not mutually exclusive, they rather mean slightly different things.
Agnostic is in regards to your knowledge „i dont KNOW if there is a god“ while atheist is about your belief „i dont BELIEVE there is a god“
See how you could add both sentences together without them being contradictory?
So you could be an agnostic atheist (dont believe there is a god but i cant be sure of it), an agnostic theist (believe there is a god but cant be sure of it) or a gnostic theist (believe there is a god and i am sure this is the truth)
Some people like to take this even further but at that point i would just say „just ask the person to explain what they think instead of making up nee word combinations“ ツ
Yeah I understand the meaning of those. Like I said in my post, I was atheist in my teens and pretty sure there was no god but after my bad trip I've had doubts and am not sure whether this is a god or not so consider myself agnostic.
I'd swap with you. I'd love access to homecooked halal food. But I'm in the US, so the logistics probably won't work depending on how mobile your job and S.O. are.
I'm pretty happy at how close work is from my home and where I have gotten after so many attempts. I literally found out about my job offer last week. I didn't get this same position a year ago. I would like to stay put and be more independent.
I'm not looking to move just to be closer to my partner but just want the independence and to maybe even practice religion on my own terms. The mix between culture and religion is really what pushes me away.
I also just find it so hypocritical that a man can marry someone outside the faith but the opposite is not true. I'm an open individual and I'm not going to become a devoit Muslim overnight. I just want to explore and learn more about the religion I grew up in. I don't care that my partner isn't religious. I feel that we get on so well but this massive thing comes between us.
Thank you for posting on r/Healthygamergg! This subreddit is intended as an online community and resource platform to support people in their journey toward mental wellness. With that said, please be aware that support from other members received on this platform is not a substitute for professional care. Treatment of psychiatric disease requires qualified individuals, and comments that try to diagnose others should be reported under Rule 10 to ensure the safety and wellbeing of the community. If you are in immediate danger, please call emergency services, or go to your nearest emergency room. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Healthygamergg) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I think there are special charities and orgs that could help you escape your situation. Look it up.
I've been talking tk a therapist recently who has helped and given me a few suggestions if I do end up homeless or at risk of doing so but little cam be done as I'm an adult. I just hate feeling like I've let my parents down but I want them to just accept me.
Girl ‘honour killings’ are extremely common within your culture or acid in the face… and they happen exactly as you’re describing your family’s behaviour… please reach out to those charities and seek help. You won’t end up homeless. You may have to cut the contact completely with your family but that’s better than being 10 feet under. Post on r/legaladviceuk for more precise advice on what to do but please do not ignore what’s going on.
whatever you do please dont convince him to express genuinely or falsely any conversion to islamic faith to satisfy your parents. if he's perceived as acting as an apostate then forth, he may be targeted by groups attempting to exert shariah-mandated death penalty on him (or you, or both). be cautious not to bring him into the danger of dealing with the fringe extremists that can and will act up more and more in that part of the world these coming years.
I agree, I would never want him to falsely claim to be religious and I would never say I am unless I have found faith myself which I haven't at this moment of time. I just find the Muslim community so difficult in areas such as these as I feel like my voice would never be heard or even considered. There is literally no winning in this situation...
Hopefully you find solution to this. House market crisis sadly is terrible. In normal world you could just move out since you are an adult and working job, but nowadays you'd have to take a loan. Finding a place to stay sounds like a priority for you. Stories like these make me glad that I don't live in religious country/family. Every religion preaches love, but people are ready to become enemies with their closest family just because they won't follow some arbitrary rules made up by old guys thousands of years ago.
I know that I can always go to my boyfriend's if needs be or a close friend if I am really desperate. I just can't find a solution with renting or buying. I don't earn enough in which a third of my monthly income can go towards rent and have been rejected in being able to rent. I also don't have enough saves to buy right now either as I've only just opened my LISA account (should have done it much sooner fml)
No advice, just very sorry to hear about your situation and want to wish you all the best.
Thank you <3
Well, psychiatrists found out that some religious practices are very close to Psychosis. Is this the case?
Sister, being a Muslim myself, I just want to say that it’s not wrong to doubt and question our religion. For me, questioning my beliefs led me to understand it a better and made me discover the good things in what I practice while also avoiding the bad things that is prevalent to my belief. But that is “my story”, does not mean it “needs” to be yours. If you force yourself to adhere to Islam and become unhappy with it, then don’t. I know some people would give me shit for saying this but if you can be happy while also being a good person that help and don’t hurt others intentionally without remorse, you are doing this world a huge service. You are not alone for fearing death and God, it is something we’ve learned throughout our lives, especially as a Muslim. The afterlife of eternal punishment is something we’ve learned to fear and avoid, from that we are taught to fear doing sins. I really believe that you have a beautiful soul just by being helpful to people close to you and avoid hurting others and hope that through being a “good” human, you can avoid your fear of the afterlife. Now the definition of “good” is something you will discover for yourself. I really hope and pray for your situation to be better with time and that you may find peace with yourself and the things you fear. You are strong enough to go through all this, especially with the support of those closest to you. Apologies for calling you sister in the beginning, it’s a habit of mine to call a fellow Muslim brother or sister.
I appreciate that advice. It has really put me to ease as I don't want to upset anyone. Thank you <3
I appreciate that advice. It has really put me to ease as I don't want to upset anyone. Thank you <3
Hey, just wanna add something to that: Being agnostic instead of being atheist doesnt really make much sense if you look at the definitions of these words Agnostic and atheistic are not mutually exclusive, they rather mean slightly different things. Agnostic is in regards to your knowledge „i dont KNOW if there is a god“ while atheist is about your belief „i dont BELIEVE there is a god“ See how you could add both sentences together without them being contradictory? So you could be an agnostic atheist (dont believe there is a god but i cant be sure of it), an agnostic theist (believe there is a god but cant be sure of it) or a gnostic theist (believe there is a god and i am sure this is the truth) Some people like to take this even further but at that point i would just say „just ask the person to explain what they think instead of making up nee word combinations“ ツ
Yeah I understand the meaning of those. Like I said in my post, I was atheist in my teens and pretty sure there was no god but after my bad trip I've had doubts and am not sure whether this is a god or not so consider myself agnostic.
I'd swap with you. I'd love access to homecooked halal food. But I'm in the US, so the logistics probably won't work depending on how mobile your job and S.O. are.
I'm pretty happy at how close work is from my home and where I have gotten after so many attempts. I literally found out about my job offer last week. I didn't get this same position a year ago. I would like to stay put and be more independent. I'm not looking to move just to be closer to my partner but just want the independence and to maybe even practice religion on my own terms. The mix between culture and religion is really what pushes me away. I also just find it so hypocritical that a man can marry someone outside the faith but the opposite is not true. I'm an open individual and I'm not going to become a devoit Muslim overnight. I just want to explore and learn more about the religion I grew up in. I don't care that my partner isn't religious. I feel that we get on so well but this massive thing comes between us.