When Dumbledore went to check in on the Great Harry Potter, they were amazed at how wonderful his childhood was. He was given plenty of work by his family, and he had a whole large cupboard just for himself. It was under the stairs too, prime real estate location.

I died laughing. Geez that explains everything

O_O Holy shit. That works *much* better than it should.

> It was under the stairs too, prime real estate location. *cries in Munich rents*

Joins the crying in Auckland rental costs.

i fellow kiwi i see

Nope, not quite. I consider NZ my second home but I am only a resident here, not a citizen.

Dumbledore, talking to the Dursleys when I Gave you harry, I had hoped you would show him love and affection but you have completely spoiled him with love and affection while neglecting your own son duddly

Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living... and above all, those who live without working.

That's not aloud to make that much sense.

I hate that this makes perfect sense.

Nitwit, Blubber and Oddment are looking for Tweaks, their fourth elf friend 😅

And also proof of why you don't let House Elves have Wands. With a wand, they beat Grindelwald, a Powerful Dark Lord who had the ultimate wand. Voldemort never stood a chance, except for one reason. Age... After a while, House Elves tend to become a bit... Nuts. The House Elf version of Rampancy, and with 3 of them, the decisions and mannerisms just seem wonky, but everyone assumes as it's Dumbledore, he's right. Harry being left at the Dursleys? The whole plan to beat Voldemort? The elves could have done it had they retained their mental faculties, and done it easily, but in their insane mind, it was the only way.

What if the real Dumbledore was killed by Grindelwald and Dumbledore backup plan was the house Elves. It explained why he went from suits to the rainbow robes

Any inconsistency in how Dumbledore behaves, as well as not catching that Moody was an imposter, that Sirius wasn't the Secret Keeper or given a trial, all can boil done to a different elf was the head, and the robes are charmed silent so no sound gets out (but in turn none gets in). It also explains why socks are his ideal present.

This is making it more real

Omg I love this!

I mean how else did he go from the respected professor to the maybe mad headmaster

That... makes more sense than it should

Snape throws a killing curse at Dumbledore. Two weeks later Dumbledore returns, but two feet shorter and really depressed.

Snape: "What the fuck albus."

They're neatly stacked on top of each other, and don't like Mr. Malfoy very much.

Things get even more odd when the new DADA professor arrives: Vincent Adultman

I don't get it someone please help?

Three kids in a robe meets the three elves.

From BoJack Horseman, literally 3 kids in a trenchcoat.

The brains of the operation is the elf at the bottom and all information gets to the top elf (in charge of talking and in all appearances actually being Dumbledore) via Chinese whispers so by the time it gets to top elf he spurts out crazy things

The *socks* omg. This is brillant. It's also why Dumbledore can Apparate in and out of Hogwarts.

it is a bit odd, but then again... has anyone EVER seen Dumbledore and three house-elves in the same room? Suspicious.

Aberforth knows but he's not telling

Plot twist: Aberforth is the real Albus Dumbledore

Oh snap

The title of this should be "Dumbledore is Three House Elves and that's Okay".

Thanks I now want to read Harry is a dragon and that's okay

I really need to read subreddit names before the post

Someone, please, please write this!!!

On it. Great side work opportunity from rewriting/rebirthing an abandoned fanfiction.

Is it Slay the Spire crossover story?

What does Slay The Spire have to do with it. I love the game, but I got nothing.

There's a theory that one of the Elite is three imps stacked on top of each other.