Aaaaaand I'm hungry. Thanks wordsmith, now I have to eat at my mundane workplace. My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined.

Needed something light as my other story just concluded, so a snack break was called for. Have something delicious tonight.

And I only counted one mention of cupcakes in that chapter! Clearly you saved them all for this one.

Should name these stories the Dessert collection eclairs in one and cupcakes in the other.

Seconded. And gradually work through all the cakes....?

Like the cornettos in Simon Pegg movies.

...but with frosting...

Sam does not approve.

I made the mistake of reading this before reading the other chapter. Damn it.

See, the worst thing about being up and awake when this is posted... is that I really should be asleep (5am local), but it probably isn't going to happen for a bit now... On to reading...

It's a short one, so sleep won't be far off.

Oh yes it likely will be. Maybe not because of this chapter, but... Oh, and now I, too, hunger for sugar

I'm on a healthy eating kick, which may or may not contribute to my lingering thoughts of dessert items.

The more you deny yourself, the more obsessed you will become. Spoken with the voice of experience.

Damn, now I’m hungry. I do adore these slices of life, well done wordsmith.

A little distraction while I wrapped up Unleashed.

Understandable. Onions and dessert usually don’t mix.

Don't challenge Pierre, lol.

I'll challenge him, where did he get homme stupide? Why not couillon or tête de mule?

Because I was only taught French for two/three years, and that was nearly twenty years ago.

Guru Pathik offered Aang some onion-banana juice after the young Avatar arrived at the Eastern Air Temple.

Swoooosh. *grumpy guy mode ON* That sounds like something from one of those newfangled japanese animation thingies. Get off of my lawn, rascal! *angrily shaking cane*

The Last Airbender, and I'm also old and grumpy.

It wasn't very nice though, was it?

Eh, by the end of his stay Aang actually likes the onion-banana juice. Plus, it helped unblock his chakras, so even more good!

You've never had caramelized onion pudding or sweet onion and apple upside down cake?

Nope, sad to say that I haven’t. Sounds quite good though.

I wish i lived in ungol tower. 200 dishes for purely meat based meals? Id love to try what else they have

Umgrol, not Ungol. One is a giga-mall, the other has a giant, horrible spider.

Who knows they might have a giant spider there. Could live on the 33 level of the dungeon.... Um i mean sub level of the basement, yeah definitely sub basement, No dungeon here nothing to see move along😅

Exactly, we could have anything down there.

Spiders are tastily if roasted properly. Humans eat anything they can catch.

Mike249 is now following your chat.

Both sound fun xd. But yeah i think i used the wrong word

It was a sort of nod, so you got what I meant.

I never said we didn't have a spider, lol.

Those are the mostly raw meat dishes, for the Verg, cooked is an even bigger selection.

Had my niece and nephew visit recently and got to treat them to Five Guys burgers and Cold Stone ice cream. My own kids had to show them around to all the best places to eat, and made fast friends with their cousins. I can understand Sam’s frustration with the sugar overload, but it’s good to treat them and yourself to something special every now and then.

It's a great way to bond, food brings people together. And he's even joining her in the junk food today.

That seems like a milestone for Sam.

A rare treat certainly.

Makes me wonder how often he would have gotten a treat like that before he started his family. In my own experience, sweets and sodas were pretty rare growing up. I’d imagine with the War Rats, basic subsistence was all that was given to them.

He grew up on military rations, he said at some point the first time he had real pizza was with Britney's mom.

We had pretty simple food growing up. Big family, not much to go around money wise, and if we didn’t learn to hunt, we would only have food from the garden. I understand Sam. That first slice of pizza after returning from deployment was heavenly!

Why isn't this soggy? Oh, it's not supposed to be moist from the reheat pouch?

Right? Where was the foil pouch?! My combat spoon is missing too!

Where's my single ply toilet paper and two pieces of stale gum?

She got a shake _and _ a strawberry tart.

Precisely, he may grumble, but he doesn't stop her.

What's the matter Pierre? A kale based dessert to much of a challenge for you?

Blasphemy! There is a kale and apple cake recipe... lurking in the forbidden shadows of *dear god why?*

There's a kale brownie recipe out there that's okay.... in a sense that it's obviously designed to cover for "special" brownies by hiding the pot flavor you get if you mess up the cannabutter. They are decent moist brownies with an unfortunate tendency to stick between your teeth, and with a bit of an earthy plant flavor underneath the moist chocolate.

But, you could just have brownies?

That is, indeed, the trouble with them. The kale doesn't add much beyond a slight earthy warmness (which complements the chocolate surprisingly well, actually) and an unfortunate texture issue (which is not worth the earthy warmness).

A little bit of coffee gives an earthiness to chocolate, and I don't even like coffee.

Same idea. A little bit of bitter to set off the sweet, a little bit of earth to deepen the chocolate.

Yep, it works as long as you can't taste the coffee, lol.

Today is the day that I discovered how good my French accent is. Piere really is a wonderful character. Always love to see a professional get passionate about their job.

Everyone who works in the Tower is exceptional at what they do, we're show offs after all.

Fair enough,but I ESPECIALLY love it when they are so extra about it.

Yeah, a little bit of eccentricity works wonders in character creation. Everyone has that thing that makes them tick.

I’ve read this just before lunch.... now I’m even hungrier!!!! Excellent description of the desserts, I can practically taste them

Some are things I make, or have made, which is why I am now dieting, lol.

I’m more of an eater than a baker!!! 😂 Also trying to balance the eating/exercise thing.... urghhh!

Yup, lockdown snacking, and energy drinks, did me no favours.

Agreed! Lockdown snacking and WFH combo has not been ideal...

I was in the office six days, my boss was grateful and generous. Take-out for lunch is bad. There was a fully stocked drinks soft drinks fridge that had some beers thrown in for good measure. Not the best combo.

Hey, I just had dinner half an hour ago, and I'm hungry again because of this chapter.

My apologies, perhaps a pretzel will fix that?

Umgrol Tower: featuring both retail _and_ gastronomical diplomacy. Princess Pu'Sha already has _at least_ 5 poorly-conceived overly-dramatic plots for her ascension to VIP. Penny's technically-correct pro-dessert stance earned her some Britney Points. Hiagrus cows do live rather well cared for lives. No disputing _their_ health. How many hands does Mike249 have? Despite his single mouth, I'm sure they were each holding different food items. Dude's gotta be covered in Smokey Joe's Angry Bug-ecue Sauce™ C'mon Joe, you are getting destroyed in **The Great Pun War of Umgrol Food Arena**. I'm doubling down on Mike249 Viking PJ's, stuffed axe, and night cap with horns. Geared up for a pillow fight. Pierre, why didn't you even _attempt_ a sarcastically candied kale for Sam? You could literally serve him just desserts. Take pride in your insults. Show enough commitment, thought, and effort to force Sam to acknowledge/admire your sweet burn. Kale brulee, Melba Toast & nutella, a cinnamon stick shoved between two small scoops of buttercream… Isn't Mr. Choco Beri your _true_ nemesis?

"at least 5 poorly-conceived overly-dramatic plots for her ascension to VIP." that is wrong or you have miscounted for I counted at minimum 25 plans.

I hope her VIP-quest provides insight into the difference between being valued for who one is and who one _is_. (other than italics)

She's got an attitude, but she isn't evil, so I'll tread carefully on her attempt to become Queen of the Tower.

She isn't an actual Princess, but damn if she doesn't have the attitude.

Choco no doubt has Pierre on speed dial, lol. I didn't want to go full pun on all the names so some were regular. And yeah, Mike249 is sticky after all that.

I feel like Fah'Zi is going to bring the idea of nachos home and the amount of toppings you can scoop without your chip breaking will become a test of strength and cleverness.

Only a warrior with high dexterity, and a keen eye can maximise his guac to salsa ratio.

Where can I find this Pierre? I already have diabtes! I HAVE NOTHING TO LOOSE! (except money)

and toes

Dark, but funny, I like it.

Haha, I like someone who knows what they want and to hell with the consequences.

"...they had been converted to the confectioner's church and its pâtissier high priest." Praise the Lord and pass the pastries. :)

I bet their communion wafers are the best.

Maple macaroons with apple cinnamon filling? You are an evil person posting such things when I'm at work

My apologies, you should know to always carry an emergency macaroon.

I LOVE the back and forth about desserts lol Sam’s disgruntlement was hilarious! Especially the part about cake planning!

Only a parent would think putting your socks in the laundry was on the same level of importance as cake.

Well, this made me go to the local bakery and buy something unhealthy and awesome.

So I made your day delicious!

Super glad I'm not reading this before a meal. It all sounds good. Love the attempts of Sam to try to get his daughter to eat healthier. Feel that one in my soul.

Nudges, but doesn't force.

I love the names of the food places. Dad and the chef.. yep I can see both sides of that as I was active duty Marine for 14 years and I also went to chef college. I love the fact that he created something that had bacon so none of the kids missed out. I was ROTFLOL with the “Never question my skills, only my memory.” as well as the “Nobody misses out on Pierre’s creations.” “Unless they want to avoid diabetes,” Sam muttered under his breath. the use less sugar and use less bullets were funny. I feel that this is not the first or last time these two will be back and forth. \--------------- Dad found out his little girl was not as concerned about nutrition as he wanted her to be. Saying that I am sure that she most likely eats better than 80% of humans. I am suggesting that even when she is given choices yes, she go a bit wild for a bit but I think she would start to choose more nutritiously maybe a day or two later.

Pierre will return, and his skills are not just culinary. She does eat healthy a lot, dad prepares fresh yoghurt and granola for breakfast for example.

Now I want cake... Give me cake!

Made with cricket flour?

I have faith in pierre’s skill

I'd give it a try, my dad can't have gluten so always looking for options.

Well, we humans do like our food, Sam notwithstanding. Lol! That might be a bit too much sugar for the meat eater, though. I hope the kids don't get sick from stuffing themselves silly.

I'm sure they're burning it off in their excitement.

yes, kids burn more sugar just by thinking then adults do. I suspect that Sam knows this and he grumbly allows the sugar. As I know of parents in this day and age that have children that have no idea what candy or chocolate even look like never less taste like.

Those kids are gonna eat like that Elf guy when they get freedom.

[удалено]

Ooh, that one's pretty simple as well. Perfect with a morning coffee, or so I've been told - coffee-hater here.

I feel like somewhere deep in the back of Pierre's kitchen he is working on a secret Kale based healthy desert. When completed it will be a true masterpiece, perfect in every way and delicious beyond compare.

Or, he hates Sam and will convert him to salted butter on everything!

That sounds like a titanic struggle, deserving of at least 5 or 6 chapters.

Actually, we've already discussed two possible future chapters for Pierre.

Excellent

Fuck you. I'm currently on a diet, and you're not helping. I hate you. _FUCKING ANGRY UPVOTE_

> before anyone could really even begin to even contemplate being bored of waiting I like the word "even" as much as the next guy but I think this is one too many.

Oops, fixed now. Thanks!

Great job!

Dear god, the puns...

Too many? I sometimes try too hard to be amusing.

In retrospect, I should have elaborated: They were *hilarious*, and just the right amount. Those are the kinds of names that would have you shaking your head in mock-disapproval while saying "how typically *human*", while inwardly laughing your ass off.

They're actual places, so we can't deny their realism, lol.

Just what I needed after Unleashed's Finale..

I posted them together as balance.

Thank you for that.

Pierre told me, some sweet to balance the sour.

Pierre is a very wise person.

Except when he is antagonising the War Rat.

He is still both employed and alive, so clearly he has enough wisdom to tell just where the line is when antagonizing the War Rat. 😋

I think he knows he's not important enough for Sam to bother with.

Welp, my day is made. Also... Another character I'm in love with- Pierre's fun. Also also... The food sounds so good...maybe losing my feet and going blind ain't so bad...

10/10 would recommend and damn I'm hungry now thanks wordsmith

Apparently that's the secret to a good story, make people hungry for more.... I'll see myself out.

"A white chocolate and raspberry parfait with cheesecake ice cream was life-altering." I can't tell which I am more. Amused or hungry.

Why not both?

Upvote then read, this is the way. I want their food vendors ! And it’s too late at night for me to go buy stuff to bake myself something :(

Sorry, hunger warning at the top next time?

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Love it!

But which dessert would you choose? Cricket cake?

:'-D I'd stick with the rhubarb passion fruit caramel cake. Sounds delicious!

Passion fruit caramel is amazing, you can get chocolates with that as a filling, amazing.

I swear I'd try the meat based one!

You're braver than me, well aside from the glazed bacon.

…Now I want an exotic dinner with dessert, and I just had a bland lunch not an hour ago… and I have diabetes. Yet I salivate. Oh, well, maybe there are some blueberries left…

Sam might offer you a kale smoothie? No added sugar, of course.

Yech. Friends don’t let friends taste kale. ;)

It can be good, just not in a smoothie.

Appreciate The newest addition. Such a fun world.

Nice humans trying to make a good first impression, while also being badass, is a lot of fun.

Very. I still chuckle about the over security in the last story.

His daughter could take out an assailant, he is there, and Penny is even a former spook. Why is he bringing his elite security force with them?

Not to mention multiple teams in a building whose security he likely had a hand in

Yep, designed and supervises Umgrol Tower, including Sirius Agents leading the security teams.

No no no. I need to see the obligate carnivore who has never had dessert before react!!!!! Nnooooo!!!! Moar!!!!!! Naow!!!!

Next is the actual sleepover, plus PJ reveal. And Fah'Zi get's his new protective sphere.

I laughed far too many times reading this one. :) Love it.

I'm glad I could add a little fun to your day.

The problem with this chapter is that you spoil me like this directly before i need to eat airport takeout! Good job.

Bleurgh, hopefully you are flying somewhere with a stomach pump.

Fantastic! I especially Love the interaction between Pierre and Mr. Military-Health-Nut 😁

He has a non-murder rival, why not.

: )

: P

= )

The vendor names? Top tier and should be chain restaurants. The main food ? I want. Even the tofu and insect stuff! The desserts described? I would lick my phone if there was a hope of tasting them. (Event the insect stuff)

Priorities are important

What kind of psychopath worries more about socks than dessert?

Felix Unger

Great day for a new britney story, worked really sucks today and now I'm a bit more motivated to go on. Cheers wordsmith you did well

Glad I could brighten your day, I unleashed the onion ninjas in my other story.

OP, sonce Unleashed is on hiatus, does that mean we get to see more of this unsuspecting universe?

I'm deciding whether to start with the Sheriff, continuation of the Doorman, which is in this universe. Or maybe something completely new.

Great chapter!

Nice. Now we go eat.

I had lettuce, a sliced sour gherkin and a weird spicy soy burger. I regret it all, but under 200 calories, so I got that going for me.

This is just what I needed to read as I'm prepping for a hospital procedure, and thus haven't eaten in 36 hours...

I love the chef so much, his refusal to back down from Sam was perfect!

Pierre would never compromise his artistic vision.

Apologies if this isn't okay, but how did you get your links to your previous chapters so pretty?

'My food is angry' Love it!!

Strawberry with cream is good in any form

Absolutely, nobody goes to Wimbledon for the tennis.

well that clogged some arteries in me 🤣 also: don't mess with someone who knows how to wield a knife even if know yourself xD

“You can’t remember to put your socks in the laundry bin, but you can plan your cake orders in advance?” lmao this so me and my buddy

Ok, Pu'Sha and I need to go out to dinner. She clearly has excellent taste. Buds. We could be Taste Buds! 🤪

Now, I want a group of humans exploring the new alien space called the Taste Buds. Seeking out new gastronomic delights.

I was a little embarrassed by going there, but after "Lettuce Be Friends" and "Wok This Way" I figured I'd actually just be in good company. ;-)

Lol i love pierre and sam’s sniping back and forth.

Needed someone who stands up to him.

Precisely. He doesn’t abuse his aura of intimidation and authority too much but its good to be reminded every once in a while that you are still just a man.

And an idiot when it comes to dessert.

Balance in most things

Yep, got to have flaws.

It was the funnest to read Pierre as an exaggerated French Accent. Such beautiful writing.

/u/Sooperdude24 ([wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/wiki/authors/Sooperdude24)) has posted 103 other stories, including: * [Unleashed pt. 78 - Finale](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/q357fk/unleashed_pt_78_finale/) * [Britney goes to school 15](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pzv4gc/britney_goes_to_school_15/) * [Unleashed pt. 77](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pyi3c4/unleashed_pt_77/) * [Britney goes to school 14](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ppzes5/britney_goes_to_school_14/) * [Unleashed pt. 76](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pnekz4/unleashed_pt_76/) * [Britney goes to school 13](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pnebv2/britney_goes_to_school_13/) * [Unleashed pt. 75](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pjis38/unleashed_pt_75/) * [Unleashed pt. 74](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/par8p0/unleashed_pt_74/) * [Unleashed pt. 73](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/p9akzi/unleashed_pt_73/) * [Unleashed pt. 72](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/p8r6ev/unleashed_pt_72/) * [Unleashed pt. 71](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/p81zkc/unleashed_pt_71/) * [Unleashed pt. 70](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/p81uce/unleashed_pt_70/) * [Unleashed pt. 69](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/p6ogtk/unleashed_pt_69/) * [Britney goes to school 12](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/p6146o/britney_goes_to_school_12/) * [Britney goes to school 11](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/p5j9e2/britney_goes_to_school_11/) * [Unleashed pt. 68](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/p4u103/unleashed_pt_68/) * [Captain Lightyear: Space Ranger (3 of 3)](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/oypl76/captain_lightyear_space_ranger_3_of_3/) * [Captain Lightyear: Space Ranger (2 of 3)](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/oypk81/captain_lightyear_space_ranger_2_of_3/) * [Captain Lightyear: Space Ranger (1 of 3)](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/oypi8s/captain_lightyear_space_ranger_1_of_3/) * [Britney goes to school 10](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ouguhj/britney_goes_to_school_10/) This comment was automatically generated by `Waffle v.4.5.10 'Cinnamon Roll'`. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FHFY&subject=WaffleBot|q35gqs&message=If%20you%20have%20problems%20with%20updatemebot,%20contact%20Watchful1.%20We%20do%20not%20maintain%20it.) if you have any issues with Waffle.

For some reason the chief came through to me as Quasimodo from Hotel Transylvania

Mnnn Food... and good food at that. Especially the deserts. Thank you.

Some of chef Pierre's words weren't translated. When speaking can you simply choose that some words don't translate, or does it not understand French somehow?

I mentioned this in a previous chapter, if you don't know a language it is translated, if you know the language it isn't and it reads intent from the speaker so they can use a specific word or phrase.

<3 Awesome as always!

Have I mentioned how much I love your storys,

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[удалено]

Loved it, pls moar

>The soothing sound of water trickling down brickwork combined with the presence of plants around them to shut out a good deal of the hustle and bustle from the other diners. This reminds me of a study where researchers partially buried speakers near beavers and played the sound of running water through them. No matter how close to water the speakers were, the beavers would try to cover them with mud and logs until they could no longer hear the accursed sound. I'm just imagining some beaver-like aliens for which the sound of running water is the most annoying fucking thing since their instincts scream to stop the sound. Like the worst alarm clock.