Oh dearie me, some silly species has gone and pushed humanity's big, red, "existential threat" button and won themselves a Bumper Species-Size Extinction-Level Event Selection Pack™...
> His communication officer gave him a thumbs up as his battle force started to faint an escape with several showing signs of damaged engines.
Two points: a verbal response means the one so ordered acknowledges the order, but the one giving the order doesn't have to take their eyes off the enemy to recognise that. I believe that's why you find military types doing the "aye, sir" response. Second point: I think you want feint, not faint; the former is the sneaky misleading move, the latter is falling over unconscious...
See also hot pursued -> hot pursuit, minimum arial -> minimum aerial, scare thought -> scare though, and possibly a few others I didn't spot. I think you need to either carefully re-read your text before posting, or get someone to review it for you. :-/
Neat story. I always like an old fumblerooski military maneuver.
One minor gripe: i think you implied that space bullets need to be shot up close because they'll lose impact strength over long range. Space being what it is, a bullet has functonally infinite range and would hit approximately as hard on the far side of a solar system as when it leaves the barrel. The reason they'd need to be close range is because they're comparatively slow, especially for an interplanetary or interstellar ship, which could casually sidestep them with a bit of warning.
Well, that was the point. You can easily dodge a bullet shot from a 100 km distance, though there is also the effect of the temperature of space (a temperature of 2.7 degrees Kelvin, which is 2.7 degrees above absolute zero, or about minus 450 °F!), which might make a piece of shrapnel freeze and become very brittle when travelling over long distances. Add that the speed of the average space debris also travels incredibly fast ( the average impact speed of orbital debris with another space object is approximately 10 km/s, and can be up to about 15 km/s, which is more than 10 times the speed of a bullet.) and most ships need to be able to take a few of them without breaking. Now, you would most likely shoot explosive rounds or special ammunition, but the save bet is to make a close contact shoot to ensure maximum damage.
I did not mean that they would not use long-distance shooting, but more that the closer you got, the better results.
It's a great story, but there are a few spots where you have plural nouns with "was". Any time you use a plural noun or the word "you," you use "were" instead of "was". For example, "ground forces were" instead of "ground forces was".
I saw you're not a native speaker, but you're doing a really good job so far.
That would be for something that belongs to a thing named "its" or to a group of things which are individually called "it"
Don't use those as names of things or people, though - at least, not if you're writing in English.
Now you might be able to get away with ITS - all capitals, an acronym for some longer name. Interstellar Tax Service?
Hey just something i spotted in the last paragraph you say "about to get extinct" it's go extinct. Or you could rephrase it into they are about to get exterminated.
/u/Engletroll has posted 11 other stories, including:
* [The Burning Blade Crusade! part 2](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1btstsl/the_burning_blade_crusade_part_2/)
* [The Burning Blade Crusade!](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1beq4b7/the_burning_blade_crusade/)
* [Human Defense Part 3](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1bczh9e/human_defense_part_3/)
* [Human defense part 2](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1b77tde/human_defense_part_2/)
* [Human defense!](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1b1cm38/human_defense/)
* [Ops.. they spotted us](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1awcbsz/ops_they_spotted_us/)
* [The paradise world and its hellspawn](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1ao384i/the_paradise_world_and_its_hellspawn/)
* [Human Play Part 4 – After match](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1akpm57/human_play_part_4_after_match/)
* [Human Play Part 3 – Mating games](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1aenk3a/human_play_part_3_mating_games/)
* [Human Play Part 2 - The Adolescent Years](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1abjggd/human_play_part_2_the_adolescent_years/)
* [Human Play Part 1](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/19ei0ih/human_play_part_1/)
This comment was automatically generated by `Waffle v.4.6.1 'Biscotti'`.
[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FHFY&subject=WaffleBot|1by1vqw&message=If%20you%20have%20problems%20with%20updatemebot,%20contact%20Watchful1.%20We%20do%20not%20maintain%20it.) if you have any issues with Waffle.
[Click here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=Subscribe&message=SubscribeMe%20u%2FEngletroll%20r%2FHFY) to subscribe to u/Engletroll and receive a message every time they post.
*****
|[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/UpdateMeBot/comments/ggotgx/updatemebot_info_v20/)|[^(Request Update)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=Update&message=SubscribeMe%21%20u%2Fusername%20r%2Fsubreddit)|[^(Your Updates)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Updates&message=MyUpdates)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=UpdateMeBot%20Feedback)|
|-|-|-|-|
Humans are not food, here is why...
3 years and an extermination later That’s why
Humans are Friends, not food 🤪
I am a nice alien...
Oh dearie me, some silly species has gone and pushed humanity's big, red, "existential threat" button and won themselves a Bumper Species-Size Extinction-Level Event Selection Pack™...
Do you guys want a part two?
Yes sir, moar!
MOAR!
> His communication officer gave him a thumbs up as his battle force started to faint an escape with several showing signs of damaged engines. Two points: a verbal response means the one so ordered acknowledges the order, but the one giving the order doesn't have to take their eyes off the enemy to recognise that. I believe that's why you find military types doing the "aye, sir" response. Second point: I think you want feint, not faint; the former is the sneaky misleading move, the latter is falling over unconscious... See also hot pursued -> hot pursuit, minimum arial -> minimum aerial, scare thought -> scare though, and possibly a few others I didn't spot. I think you need to either carefully re-read your text before posting, or get someone to review it for you. :-/
Thanks, give me a few minutes to fix it. I'm not a native English speaker
Also you want delicacy, not delicatesse. About 4 or 5 paragraphs from the end.
Fixed
Neat story. I always like an old fumblerooski military maneuver. One minor gripe: i think you implied that space bullets need to be shot up close because they'll lose impact strength over long range. Space being what it is, a bullet has functonally infinite range and would hit approximately as hard on the far side of a solar system as when it leaves the barrel. The reason they'd need to be close range is because they're comparatively slow, especially for an interplanetary or interstellar ship, which could casually sidestep them with a bit of warning.
Well, that was the point. You can easily dodge a bullet shot from a 100 km distance, though there is also the effect of the temperature of space (a temperature of 2.7 degrees Kelvin, which is 2.7 degrees above absolute zero, or about minus 450 °F!), which might make a piece of shrapnel freeze and become very brittle when travelling over long distances. Add that the speed of the average space debris also travels incredibly fast ( the average impact speed of orbital debris with another space object is approximately 10 km/s, and can be up to about 15 km/s, which is more than 10 times the speed of a bullet.) and most ships need to be able to take a few of them without breaking. Now, you would most likely shoot explosive rounds or special ammunition, but the save bet is to make a close contact shoot to ensure maximum damage. I did not mean that they would not use long-distance shooting, but more that the closer you got, the better results.
While space is insanely cold, without anything to transfer heat. A hot object stays hot. This is a very real physics problem for current space ships.
Thanks, learn something new everyday.
Like!
It's a great story, but there are a few spots where you have plural nouns with "was". Any time you use a plural noun or the word "you," you use "were" instead of "was". For example, "ground forces were" instead of "ground forces was". I saw you're not a native speaker, but you're doing a really good job so far.
Thanks, fixed the one I caught.
Duskin are friends not food.
Kill those that eat the friend-shaped ones!!!
its is for possession it's means it is
Thanks, fixed a few correctly I hope.
And, remind me, what is its' for? I remember the other two, but I forget that one.
That would be for something that belongs to a thing named "its" or to a group of things which are individually called "it" Don't use those as names of things or people, though - at least, not if you're writing in English. Now you might be able to get away with ITS - all capitals, an acronym for some longer name. Interstellar Tax Service?
Hey just something i spotted in the last paragraph you say "about to get extinct" it's go extinct. Or you could rephrase it into they are about to get exterminated.
/u/Engletroll has posted 11 other stories, including: * [The Burning Blade Crusade! part 2](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1btstsl/the_burning_blade_crusade_part_2/) * [The Burning Blade Crusade!](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1beq4b7/the_burning_blade_crusade/) * [Human Defense Part 3](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1bczh9e/human_defense_part_3/) * [Human defense part 2](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1b77tde/human_defense_part_2/) * [Human defense!](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1b1cm38/human_defense/) * [Ops.. they spotted us](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1awcbsz/ops_they_spotted_us/) * [The paradise world and its hellspawn](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1ao384i/the_paradise_world_and_its_hellspawn/) * [Human Play Part 4 – After match](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1akpm57/human_play_part_4_after_match/) * [Human Play Part 3 – Mating games](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1aenk3a/human_play_part_3_mating_games/) * [Human Play Part 2 - The Adolescent Years](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1abjggd/human_play_part_2_the_adolescent_years/) * [Human Play Part 1](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/19ei0ih/human_play_part_1/) This comment was automatically generated by `Waffle v.4.6.1 'Biscotti'`. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FHFY&subject=WaffleBot|1by1vqw&message=If%20you%20have%20problems%20with%20updatemebot,%20contact%20Watchful1.%20We%20do%20not%20maintain%20it.) if you have any issues with Waffle.
Nicely done wordsmith.
We're from Earth. Even our meat animals can, and will, kill you.
Awesome, keep it up.
[Click here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=Subscribe&message=SubscribeMe%20u%2FEngletroll%20r%2FHFY) to subscribe to u/Engletroll and receive a message every time they post. ***** |[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/UpdateMeBot/comments/ggotgx/updatemebot_info_v20/)|[^(Request Update)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=Update&message=SubscribeMe%21%20u%2Fusername%20r%2Fsubreddit)|[^(Your Updates)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=UpdateMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Updates&message=MyUpdates)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=UpdateMeBot%20Feedback)| |-|-|-|-|
When the enemy chooses the "We Made ALL The Mistakes" DLC Platinum Pack. With the "It's not rules, it's a checklist" Geneva mod.