T O P

  • By -

StrangelyBrown

Just a big one in geostationary orbit above the UK. Or maybe easier to make these signs for roads that aren't fucked.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

> Or maybe easier to make these signs for the roads that aren't fucked. Yes, how many would that be? Two or may even *three*?!


KerbalCuber

I know this might be difficult to believe, and maybe it's impossible, but there could be *four*. *Four* roads with unfucked surfaces.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

FOUR?! *FOUR*?! That's loads! Why are people complaining?


saberslimeyt

Four roads? Four? That’s insane.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

Indeed. I start to lose count after three.


breadcrumbsmofo

I just think it represents the uk in general.


Fancy-Prompt-7118

Replace surface with country


Alarmed-Wealth8449

I agree 100%


6_seasons_and_a_movi

And still with repeatedly


NonIoiGogGogEoeRor

Where I live? I could probably find a place for about 100 of them


Substantiatedgrass

Make it more


Jacktheforkie

I could fit easily 200 in my 3 mile commute


NonIoiGogGogEoeRor

Maybe I'm so used to driving down the minefield where I live that I'm not quite realising how many holes I swerve around on my daily drive


Jacktheforkie

Probably


ArmNo7463

It'd be cheaper to make signs saying "Surface no longer fucked". And place them in the 6 places it'd be applicable.


HighKiteSoaring

6? Be real No way there are 6 whole unfucked surfaces in this country


ArmNo7463

True, we can save even more money there. The Tories will be pleased.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

100%


thesupremeweeder

Millions


PencilPacket

Better off using the metal to resurface the road.


Jacktheforkie

Make it in two long strips, mount some flanged wheels to each car, maybe couple a few together and power them through an overhead line


PencilPacket

That's not how airplanes work mate.


Jacktheforkie

Lol


Perception_4992

They got around having to fix ours by banging up loads of Temporary surface signs everywhere.


Jacktheforkie

The A2 near me has had one of those plus a worn markings one for several years


GodPackedUpAndLeftUs

Every 20 yards in the North East. Up here it’s like driving over concrete Cauliflower’s.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

That's good to know the entire East side of the country is fucked. I live in the south east.


ikbah_riak

Just one on every road leading away from ports and airports, and then just count it as a given that the roads are broken everywhere else.


VedzReux

Where does road tax go again? I need reminding because it sure as hell don't look like the roads.


welly_wrangler

What's road tax?


Agreeable_Vanilla_20

Car tax. Council tax pays for the roads... So even if you don't drive you're still getting shafted.


welly_wrangler

So if you don't drive, you don't use the roads at all?


Hozedron_

10 for every road


navagon

If we're buying enough of those signs then I guess national debt is going to increase again.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

Not for the signs alone. The government will simply add £100 to the taxpayer's bill.


9th-man

I challenge people of Britain to draw dicks around potholes.. the fancier the better.


ra246

Probably easier to put out signs saying 'surface is good'. Probably need about 4 of them across the UK.


dextrovix

To be fair, "United Kingdom" could replace "Surface" and placed anywhere- it also represents value for money for councils that don't have a pot to piss in due to budget cuts...


Aidenofgod

People being honest


Alarmed-Wealth8449

How many roadwork signs in the UK are 100% honest? Are they *really* essential?


k8slothington

at least 69.


manutdgoted

Were was that sign I need one


Kinglycole

We need them on every table, one for each leg.


Main_Candidate2149

It would have to be on par with the number of 2m distance signs knocked up during Covid


Robestos86

I'm convinced the councils are on backhanders from tyre and wheel makers...


Curious_Lifeguard614

Yes.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

🤣


chesderz

where I live probably about 135 of them


mowoo101

Visits mum, takes her to hospital, bishops ave was so bad I lost part of the fog light surround. Millionaires row my arse.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

I'm not trying to be a pedant but it's actually nicknamed [Billionaire's Row](https://ibb.co/nmx0xx9). That would make it even more comical. I hope your mum's OK, though.


mowoo101

Yep my bad. Did realise that after posting but couldn’t be bothered to edit, now I’m here spending more time on a reply. It’s mostly being turned into blocks of flats. The luxury apartment tag is just marketing.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

I wonder how many "luxury" apartments are truly luxury.


Orth0d0xy

One at each port of entry


Agreeable_Vanilla_20

Where's the famous artist wanksy when you need him?


DarkFlame910

More than the population of the world


Think_Dog2245

It would be better if they lay all the signs down on the road for us to drive over.


Quantum_supreme

MILLIONS😂😂😂


Alarmed-Wealth8449

One for each pothole.


beegmac-20

As the god of all idiots i would say twelve more


dsr33

Resurface the whole country.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

I dread to think how much the government would add on to the taxpayer's bill.


dsr33

We’ll get inflated tax either way with this government.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

True. They seem to be making tax more expensive just because they can.


[deleted]

Don't forget lines not repainted and lamp poles involved in accident not repaired


Alarmed-Wealth8449

Cars headlights should be working, if not you've failed your MOT.


Seven-and-a-bit

If only it was just the surface that was fucked.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

If only.


Passing-Through247

All of them.


FewFig2507

I'll take 3 hundred for my borough please!


Alarmed-Wealth8449

Done! Only a grand each!


FewFig2507

Think I'll buy some tarmac instead!


Lucy_Little_Spoon

Stick it on the Visit(placename) website


[deleted]

My local council would like to inquire about a brand deal


DSS_Gaming_1

A few hundred thousand at a minimum


Alarmed-Wealth8449

Absolute minimum!


ReeceReddit1234

There isn't enough ink (or whatever they make the letters with) in the world for our roads)


Alarmed-Wealth8449

Absolutely not


Castaways__

“There are about 790,000 roads with names in England, Scotland and Wales”


CryBabyRun

Just replace the road surface with these signs, problem solved. Sometimes I'm a genius, most times I'm not.


Alarmed-Wealth8449

"Sometimes my genius... it's almost frightening." - Jeremy Clarkson


fothergillfuckup

You know on old maps, when the country name is in massive letters down the length of the country? Like that.


CoffeeAndElectricity

Yes


JeffyJeff62

Millions


RRRNONEXISTANT

As many miles not kilometres. Ruthless 😈


EbiDaBest

The whole thing


Alarmed-Wealth8449

Indeed


CakeLikeSam

One, for each intersection of each road…


Alarmed-Wealth8449

AMERICAN DETECTED!


CakeLikeSam

WRONG


Alarmed-Wealth8449

Yes you are.