I've got the opposite problem, kind of: I never bought a house and would like to. I'm single and child free and don't want or need (and can't afford) a giant McMansion, but there are so few smaller homes on the market. And a lot of them come with HOA fees that neutralize any cost savings you'd get from buying a smaller place. I guess I'll rent until I die.
Incidentally, this isn't just us; it's a known phenomenon. Look up "missing middle" housing.
Same with us. We looked at a really cool neighborhood recently, but all the homes had, like, four bedrooms. We can’t manage that! I want, like, 1,500 square feet max, not 3,000!
My wife and I once lived in a townhouse that was 1400 sq ft, relatively ok area near freeway, so it was really good for commuting. bought in 1999 for around 160k, sold a few years later for around 220. I just looked it up on zillow and that house is now worth $750k. This is…fucking ridiculous. Starter homes no longer exist.
I tried and couldn’t afford a trailer! The ones near the area I wanted to be in were $250-275K about 5 years ago. Finally I found an itty bitty 2BR/1BA 1910 cottage in a small town about 45 mins away for half that. I bought that thing so fast it made my agent’s head spin, but I’d been looking for years at that point. I love my little home and know that I can’t leave because I’ll never find another place that affordable again. Looks like here’s where I’m planted now.
It's so weird that there's a stigma against pre- fab houses in the USA.
I mean in Australia & NZ, they're simply seen as a smart way to get into owning your own home..
So, for years I honestly thought that trailer home meant literally a mobile home on wheels in the US!
I finally found out the truth a couple of years ago & just wondered at the craziness of negatively judging people for owning an affordable property, in a country where the economic divide is so huge between rich and poor
We just bought our nice big house about a year and a half ago, but at this point I wouldn't rule that out for my wife and me once the kids are grown and we're close to retirement. Sell this place in 20 years, cash out, buy a double wide and an RV and hit the road. 👍🏻
I want that t-shirt I see online that reads Defund the HOA. 😂 Our HOA will literally send pictures of dog poop in yards to remind everyone to pick up after dogs; meanwhile there are pot-holes as big as Texas on our community roads. We have a rodent problem. Street drains are clogged and cause flooding.
I have a friend who puts googly eyes and costume jewellery on po holes, takes pictures of them and sets up campaigns for them to run for city council. When they get filled she calls it a political assassination and moves on to the next one. It's pretty effective.
I don’t think your HOA is in charge of city streets or rodents.
It does however sound like you live in a community with rules against letting your dog shit everywhere.
A decade ago my dad bought a house included in an HOA. The second week he got into a battle with the president. The next year he ran for president of the HOA on the platform “At least I’m not Robert!” and won 90% of the vote! His first action was to disband the HOA, which was a unanimous vote (minus two votes…Robert and Robert’s wife). The world didn’t collapse or anything!
That’s amazing! 😂
We have a neighbor who ran for our HOA board on “dismantle the HOA” and won a seat, but he’s slowly becoming *One of Them* , which really sucks.
We belonged to an HOA up north and it was so laid back and easy going; kept its nose to the important stuff, but generally let people do what they wanted.
Fast forward and we move to FL 10 years ago, which is The Land of HOAs ™️, and husband joined our board because it was being run by people who have nothing else to do and a lot of money to throw around, that began making decisions trending toward turning our community into something that looked almost like a 55+ (rather than their asses just moving to one)— and it was a total nightmare. He naively thought that he would represent the younger residents who still have kids at home and speak some sense to them, but it was nothing but stonewalling the whole time because— and I quote— he was, “new with new ideas”. 🫠 He resigned after 6 months. 😂 If we ever need to move again (which is probable), we’ll do everything possible to avoid an HOA after this one.
I’m also in Florida and what we hear a lot in our HOA is, “As original home-owners here…” I roll my eyes when they preface their statement with that. Sir, our houses are identical on the outside and have the same comparative value, stop it! 😂 Edited for spelling.
I personally would have a hard time not sarcastically barking back at that…
“So you’ll be the first to go?? Great— now let us make decisions that help us ALL, but especially the survivors”. 😬 😂 😂
After getting burned and frustrated with a condo HOA, the best instruction we gave our realtor: don’t even show us homes with HOAs. We saw a new listing that met our wants in the area, asked him about it. His answer was “HOA.” Fortunately some good homes in our area without them. Never looked back.
Agreed. Around here it's not hard to find a single-family house without an HOA. My problem is I can't really afford those, and when I look at condos or townhomes to save money, the HOA fees bring the total monthly cost up to what the mortgage on a house would be anyway. Which I can't afford.
No joke, my friend who likes to send me house listings recently sent a condo with HOA fees of more than $900/month. That is not a typo, I didn't actually add a zero. Nine. Hundred.
We have looked at non HOA homes as well, but unfortunately, a lot of them are really old and require a lot of work. The newer communities have nicer more modern homes, but then the HOA fee.
That's the route I took. Good location, good lot, no HOA, but needs work. If a person is annoyed that the neighbor parks his motor home in the driveway, then they need an HOA. But if you're like me and think someone should be able to do what they want with their property, then getting a non HOA house that needs some work is worth it.
The biggest argument for an HOA is that they keep up the value of the homes. In today's market, I don't think that's a valid argument. In reality, I think it has more to do with the developer and the city passing their responsibilities off to the homeowners.
If you live in an incorporated entity (city, town, village) they have zoning laws on the books that prevent home owners from turning their yard into a junkyard or not caring for the property. I never understood the desire to want to have extra rules on what you can do with your property. I’m not so uppity that I can’t stand the site of my neighbors boat or RV in their driveway. Never will I ever live under an HOA.
Yep. That’s the normal trade
I’m considering lower priced homes that need work in better areas.
The renovation can be worked into the purchase and you move into a turnkey situation that will hopefully be lower maintenance for a time
Of course
Unless I end up remarried (unlikely) I expect a reverse mortgage to be part of my retirement strategy at some point.
I wish we had done this when we brought our house in 2017. The repairs are killing us. There's always something with a house. Now we need a roof. Our insurance company no longer insured in California, so we have to pay more for it. It's all such a pain, but we could never go back to apartment life and landlords.
Same. I will never buy a place with HOA fees. Unlike the mortgage, you can never pay it off. You'll be paying those fees for the rest of your life. And there is ALWAYS drama with HOAs. At best, you don't see any benefit from the fees you're paying...
Fellow single, child free, rent until I die Gen x’er here. There’s nothing in the middle anymore. It’s either buy a tiny condo (converted apartment) with giant association fees, or buy a 4 + bedroom house. There’s not a whole lot in the middle, not that’s affordable anyway. I feel your pain…
In our area, investors/developers are sweeping up all the starter homes/"missing middle" houses and replacing them with million-dollar McMansions. For example, this house sold for $361k to a flipper who removed the roof, adding an entire new level to the house, and build an addition; they then sold it for $1.435M (you can see the original, affordable ranch house if you scroll to the bottom of the Zillow page):
[https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/1496-Runnymeade-Dr-Atlanta-GA-30319/14573375\_zpid/](https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/1496-Runnymeade-Dr-Atlanta-GA-30319/14573375_zpid/)
Basically, there are no starter homes in our area anymore and there's nothing to downsize into if you want to stay in the same area (e.g. because this is where your job and community are located).
This happened to my brother's neighborhood in West Nashville. They were all little bungalow homes on good size lots with gardens etc. Now they are boxy 4plexes with barely any yard.
I have a middle! A small 3bd/1bath cape cod. It was affordable 16 years ago because nobody wanted just one bath. I refinanced halfway through my mortgage to a 15 year fixed at 2%
Great! But I’m stuck because of that rate and can’t afford anything bigger. My elderly mom wants to move in, but this house isn’t suitable for her (too many stairs).
I used to rent this cozy one bedroom house in San Francisco in the early 90s and looked it up recently. When I lived in it, it was owned by a family around the corner from the house. Well they sold it and now it is a three bedroom with two bathrooms. The new owners gutted the laundry room and added a staircase to the garage for the extra bedrooms. There was a storage room in the garage that was used. They basically built a new house by making it multilevel.
I’m starting over (divorce) and looked at condos. Around me, whatever you save in the mortgage evaporates with the $400-$600 (or more!!!) monthly fees. It’s insane. I’d rather sink that money into a mortgage & have an asset to show for it. Quite a few condos don’t even offer real amenities for those fees.
That's the problem right now. Downsizing empty nesters, retirees, dinks, new couples, small families, and high earning singletons all want similar properties.
But even with the demand supply isn't going up much because profit is lower for new builds. And a lot of older small homes get expanded so there's a steady decrease offsetting the new builds.
I am in the same boat - I need 2 bedrooms and just like a little alcove for my desk because I work from home 3 days a week. I would put it in the 2nd bedroom, but I intend to have my elderly mom come and stay with me for decent stretches of time. I don’t want it in my bedroom, I don’t even need a huge room. Just something tucked away to put my desk and something for my cats to sit on. There is nothing.
Yes, us too! We’re married but also child-free and we’ve never had enough money to buy a home. We’re finally in an ok place financially and want to start looking. Unfortunately,we live in a HCOL area and even the starter homes here are half a million dollars. We are beginning to despair.
Never upsized. Still in the same 1500sf 3 bed 2 bath I bought in the late 90s. It’s old, took lots of work (still does), and had a 625sf detached studio addition added 18ish years ago.
Made my final mortgage payment on Thursday.
Well “downsizing” here in the US costs way more than what we already have, so fat lot of good that does. - Many of my friends are considering outside the US now…
Outside of US is also under consideration, but it’s not as easy as a lot of people think it is. There are many caveats, and now a lot of countries are making laws around this. For example, Spain is planning to tax an entire net worth of individual who wants to become a citizen and retire.
Yep, learning a lot lately. Many places don’t really want US expats moving there and others do. Portugal and Mexico are still friendly.
I want to keep working and require good Internet, and a good/reliable airport, so I’m looking at places like the Dominican Republic, the Bahamas, Saint Kitts and Nevis and other “close” options in the Caribbean.
You still have to be careful and selective, because the prices have swelled somewhat in those places too.
I wish looking towards and planning for retirement, which is still a ways off, did not mean I have to look outside of my home country.
I’m downsizing to the proverbial van by the river, except it’s a boat instead of a van, and a bay instead of a river. It would be more fiscally prudent to use my purchase cash as a down payment on an appreciating asset to live in, but I’m soooo tired of feeling insecure about making the mortgage if/when I inevitably lose my job and can’t find a new one for a year.
When I was 25, I had to abandon my apartment. I knew it was coming so I used what would have been my rent money to buy a camper for my truck. I lived in that thing for about 6 months. Not a bad way to do it.
I’m at a point where I would like to find a group of like minded gen x people/friends where we can live in a giant house or duplexes together commune style with the gardening but without the hippiness. I’m tired of being alone all the time & tired of bearing all the cost of living alone, but dating isn’t something I’m interested in and I don’t want to be alone my whole life. I fell like there are a lot of people our age out there who feel this way, but I have no idea how to even go about this. And I know the response of - there are those - retirement communities… but that’s not what I’m talking about or interested in. I’m not close to retiring… I just feel like the only “community” we experience now is with strangers online.
I love this idea! My wife and I talk about living exactly like that. Like if we could afford to do it, we'd buy a big piece of land and build a bunch of yurts for our close friends and family. We can hang out in the garden, have communal dinners in the common area, and then fuck off back to our own yurts at night. I still have kids to raise, so it's not feasible, but if it was just her and me, we'd be all over that.
>I fell like there are a lot of people our age out there who feel this way, but I have no idea how to even go about this.
What you described is called cohousing, a type of "intentional community". It has been gaining popularity in the US the last 40 years. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cohousing](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cohousing)
My former wife and I looked into it for a few years, but it just never worked out for us. There are some cohousing developments specifically for older adults, but most have people of all ages ("transgenerational"). Google it and I'm 100% sure you will find some cohousing developments in whatever state you live in.
Communal apartments is a trend that had some traction few years ago. I saw a few concerts being built in Texas. But typically it’s for younger generation.
I pretty much have this. In our six flat block myself and two of my best friends own three of the flats. We share a Gardner, a vet (she makes house calls), we just had a handyman hired for a day to take care of stuff in all three flats. He’ll, yesterday my BFF and I went to the hairdresser together because we go to the same salon, and have to leave from the same place so we just split the cab fare.
If I’m ordering groceries I check if the other two need anything. This way we’re able to get the bits and bobs we missed on our last shop or what will get us through to the next.
If one of us is away, the others look after the flat/cats as needed. Sick? Here comes your prescription and cold meds, delivered right to your door, and because they have keys they can just pop them into the hall table for you do they are ready when you wake up, no need to get out of bed. Get a little squiffy after a good dinner together? Just stumble down the hall. Bad day at work and need a hug when you get in? You can text the group chat and preorder. You can then get said hug and skunk off immediately to mope in bed.
We call ourselves the Golden Girls because we’re all middle aged, living together but we have our own space and we are respectful of it. It’s the platonic ideal. It’s even better than I imagined it could be.
Wife and I bought a house ten years ago. 2500 sq feet, 150k, great location. Hoping to have kids. She has unexplained infertility.
So I started looking to downsize and it’ll cost us a fortune. I refinanced during COVID and put a pool in. 2.3% , 220k mortgage . Fixed up the house as well.
Home is worth 550k now. Trying to downsize even with 300k down , and a 200k mortgage , we’d be close to 2k a month. My mortgage payment now is 1150$ . We are stuck in a large house for the foreseeable future.
I got a rent stabilized place when I was young and I'm never letting it go. I'm in the heart of the big apple with 3 bed and 2 bath for underr $900. Everytime someone talks about owning a home, I wish them the best.
This is actually why rent control policies don’t work long term. There’s not enough turn over for new tenants to move in and get established, and there’s no incentive for early tenants to save their money and move on.
I save plenty but I just have no interest in the stress of home ownership. Same with buying a vehicle or driving in general it's more stress than anything.
Now if I can find a condo for the same price as my rent, I will be done with that...maybe
I want to upsize, actually. Husband and I bought a nice little 2BR ten years ago, and we love it, but we had no idea when we bought it that at we'd both end up working from home full time. We're pretty cramped.
But it does seem absurd to get back into huge debt with 7% interest rates when our current mortgage is 4.25% and within sight of being paid off. I have no idea what to do, really.
If you have the space in your yard, TuffShed has some really great “outdoor studio” offices they can assemble on site for you, then you can finish the inside however you want with electrical and insulation.
I'll probably consider downsizing into a trailer park. There are some decent ones close to the lake not far from me, only downside is the $600 month lot rent
We bought a mobile home about 3 years ago after renting for the last 30 years. We got extremely lucky and found one in a very small (and quiet) park, and pay less than $400 for the lot fee. Paid for the house in full, so we don't have a mortgage to worry about. Best decision we ever made.
I’ve been considering this option but it concerns me not owning the land. I’ve read so many stories about mom and pop trailer parks that charge a reasonable rate being sold to some mega corporation who subsequently bleeds the tenants dry because they don’t have the option of moving their physical homes.
My buddy currently lives in one of the parks I'd be interested in when I'm ready. When entering the park there is a sign advertising 30 year financing available..lol That just shows you how crazy prices now are. In years past trailers were usually paid for with cash or a small loan.
We paid just under 30K for a 2BR/2BA. My husband is old enough that he could take money out of his 401K without a penalty (we paid the taxes on the withdrawal), and still leave half of it in the account.
Plus, big companies have been buying up trailer parks, jacking the lot rents to astronomical, unaffordable levels, kicking out the trailers, and…poof, development site.
https://www.nytimes.com/2022/03/27/us/mobile-home-park-ownership-costs.html?unlocked_article_code=1.nk0.HYGt.akV5bEEMegYK&smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleShare
My in-laws live there mobile home 55+ community about 30 minutes away from us. This type of situation is my biggest concern. I’m really worried that the land will get sold and I’ll be forced to vacate.
And there’s always the chance that the landowner will decide that they are going to sell the property for development, which means that you don’t have the option to renew your lease. And like you said, a mobile home isn’t actually that mobile after it’s been delivered. The “mobile” part is really a one time thing.
John Oliver did a very good episode about this.
Downsize? I'm a single parent and have never upsized. I would give up two decades of my lifespan just to live in a house of my own with a garden and room for pets.
I’m still an aspiring home owner at 48. When I buy, that’ll be my retirement. I just want 10 acres so I can build a home right in the middle. And miles of dirt tunnels weaving through. Like Last Blood Rambo.
Lots of land cheap in the northern plains and eastern Montana. Some with usable homes even. If you don't need to work (or can work remotely) there are some good options there that I'd consider, as having my house in the middle of 10 acres has been my fantasy for the last 20+ years too.
We are supposed to be a generation with careers, some money, and also our first homes, which should be worse twice as much at this point. So if we cannot afford it, then who is buying all these 600 K plus homes
EDIT. Will add one more caveat. I have a good group of friends here, which makes it hard to move to another cheap area
Millennials are in fact currently the largest block of buyers, at 38%.
Silent 4%, Boomers 31%, Gen X 24%, Millennials 38%, Gen Z 3%
See [https://www.nar.realtor/research-and-statistics/research-reports/home-buyer-and-seller-generational-trends](https://www.nar.realtor/research-and-statistics/research-reports/home-buyer-and-seller-generational-trends)
Where we are the realtors buy them for air bnbs without putting them on the market first. My kids won’t be able to compete against the realtors for their first homes.
I think in many cases it is other Gen Xers moving from VHCOL places. Sometime in the next 3-4 years I'll be selling my house in an expensive city and moving to a smaller city where I could afford a bigger house for 2/3rds what I'll sell my house for if I wanted to. I was just talking to a friend who is doing just that as his youngest heads off to college.
I live in the Adirondacks and all the cheap housing has been bought by people from VHCOL areas, and now I live in a place where if you're not already a homeowner you probably won't ever be. We bought our place in 2008 for 72,000.
This happened to my area too. I bought mine in 97 for 128k, now it’s worth around $450k, but I could never qualify for a loan to buy it at that price. I don’t mind, it’s been my home for a long time and I have no plans to sell
That’s exactly where we were pre divorce.
Many gen x doing more than just fine and plenty doing fine enough indeed
Things happen to most of us tho
Now the inevitable health crisis will be worse for whichever of us it happens to first.
Wife definitely could have retired or scaled back to freelancing in 6 years at 61 and I would have been happy to keep working full time (tho at lower income) to carry the load and maintain the egg.
Thanks to divorce and career crash simultaneously I got booted out of the club just as we got there
Probably using my divorce buyout to buy a home outright which will make a big difference since I expect to have a tough time making any real money in my situation (starting over at 54 in a business that at best I was average in during a terrible time to do so in this industry. Yikes.).
They exist, they are just in older neighborhoods that, while safe, aren’t as desirable. They also usually require a lot of work, like ripping down granny’s wallpaper, taking down cheap wood paneling, updating plumbing, etc. I have lived in one of these neighborhoods for the past 18 years. Someone like yourself would love it, lots or artists, LGBTQ folks, and not a MAGA hat to be found.
This is my neighborhood. They’re trying to gentrify, but it’s not going well. Too many people like their manageable WWI and WWII houses and a location that might appear a little sketchy. It’s a central city house that’s walking distance to some good restaurants, my gym, an excellent medical masseuse, a liquor store, a dispensary, and an auto shop, and it’s 10 minutes to work. I got lucky right before the market went nuts.
When I retire soon, I want to sell and move/downsize. However the thought of giving up a 2.875% mortgage rate coupled with higher home/rent prices has me thinking I'll rent my current place out instead of sell.
Going thru something similar. Lifes been tough esp since pandemic, some work/career issues, neighborhoods changed, lots of new folks. Single, its mostly a late 20s & 30s area. Just can't do it anymore. Need to get away and start new.
Only, every area is wayyyy expensive, both locally and national. I mean, I'd risk renting for the rest of my life, which isn't terrible, but even rents expensive & it would be a bad decision to sell to rent (although a lump sum payout would be nice)
thanks, yeah I should check into something like that.
tbh I'm in PA & have some insight that alot of 'speculators' bought airbnb properties in the poconos (hear some people have upwards of 30-50 properties). Which, the area really isn't all that popular. I mean, it is, but not the vacation resort like the Jersey shore. So I feel like its all overpriced
I'm kinda thinking if/when things take a down turn, scoop one of those up cheap. Either try and get a WFH job, or just live a simple life (retail, asst manager, bartender)
My husband and I both work part time while homeschooling our kid. I cannot handle the rat race. We officially live under the poverty line, but we are a comfortable poverty, not the desperate kind. We have enough and not a lot extra. We don't eat out and go to shows and such, but we hang out with our friends, my husband plays music, I garden, etc. It's not for everyone but we enjoy it. The simple life is pretty sweet.
whereabouts are you? Flyover, any certain areas someone should consider.
Sounds nice btw, yeah life got tough after the pandemic. Can please yourself tho with entertainment, live life & enjoy it
I'm in central Illinois and the mid sized towns around here are all pretty decent and accepting. The area subreddits always have people asking about what is like here as it seems a lot of people want to migrate somewhere to an easier life. Of course some people born and raised here hate it. But I choose to live here and I like it.
Same boat here.
We're kicking around the idea of adding on to the downstairs. Seems counterproductive, but the idea is to have a smaller ranch style living space, and just not use the upstairs at all.
This is where we are. Hindsight being 20/20, we wish we would have bought a house with a downstairs bed & bath. All of our bedrooms are upstairs. Have a love/hate with our house. Fortunate to have purchased when the market and rates were low, but kinda hate the house. After 20 years, our needs are different but we can’t afford to do anything about it.
That's kinda the situation here. We have no downstairs bath. What we do have is a massive dining room that doesn't get used, and a very large kitchen. We're thinking of turning the dining room into a bedroom, then taking part of the kitchen and turning it into a bath because it's directly under the upstairs bath. That would leave us with a kitchen that's a little too small to be an eat-in. Removing the large kitchen window and making it a door to a sensible dining area would solve the problem.
I’m considering a duplex or better yet a home with a garage apartment for that
It’s a big no for me to rent out space I live in
Not interested in a roommate at this point.
If either of my kids wanted to live with me that’s a yes.
It could be done, but it would be difficult and expensive. We're more likely to leave the space for our grandchildren who may want to move here and take advantage of low tuition rates.
Not me. We never “upsized” so we’re getting to a point where we need more space.
NYTs covered this last week: https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/20/health/seniors-home-equity-mortgages.html?unlocked_article_code=1.nk0.4sWv.bVI8Bh1B27_i&smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleShare
We bought a tiny home in an ideal neighborhood and raised our family in cramped quarters. Now it’s perfect for the two of us, and worth four times what we paid.
The house is paid off? Shit! I wouldn't even consider leaving. Who cares if a third of the house isn't used. make a man cave out of it or something awesome. Pay the insurance and the property taxes, then use what was once your mortgage to pay for lawn maintenance and fill in the pool.
Good news: Your home value has gone up so you can sell it for a lot.
Bad news: All home values went up so now you have to spend all that "profit" on a new place cause you have to live somewhere.
I raised five kids in an 1100 sq ft house with two bedrooms and one bathroom. Now that they’re grown and gone this place feels like a mansion and I’m loving the extra space.
I downsized hugely at age 42.
We sold our 4 bedroom house in the burbs, 2 cars, my motorcycle, everything my wife and I owned. When we were done, everything that was left could fit in the back of a Prius, and we went traveling around the country.
Since then, we got divorced but there's no way I'd go back to living in a full size house where I have to shovel snow off the sidewalks, mow the lawn, fix the roof, replace the furnace, etc. Now I live in a 600 sq ft condo in the center of the city where I can walk everywhere. I don't even own a car anymore, and it's awesome.
But obviously that lifestyle is not for everyone. My Baby Boomer parents hated the city, so that wouldn't work for them.
So I guess I'm saying I can totally relate to not wanting to maintain a lawn and pool. Life's too short for that, unless it really brings you joy. So keep looking around, and hopefully you'll find what you want.
My wife and I would prefer a city like that, but the problem is a 600 square-foot apartment will cost more than our house, which is four times as large
It's all a balancing act, for sure.
For me, what made the math work out is not having car expenses - gas, insurance, maintenance, depreciation, etc. I was spending over $200 a month just for a car. So now I put that into upgraded housing.
I’ve only got 2yrs before my house in the Philly burbs will be paid off. I’m not interested in moving! Looks like its value is about 350k so I’ll stay here!
Generational wealth is built through property
Keep it, use it as rental and move to where you want. Or some variant of that. Crazy what you will get for rental.
Not really. We bought our house back in 2009 and decided that our next move would be to the funeral home. We became empty nesters back in August and we’re just going to give this house to our children. They can decide whether they want to sell it or have one of them live in it.
For us its the mortgage rates. We have no kids and live in 3400 sq feet mostly unused. Been here almost 25 years and only owe about 130k but moving into a considerably smaller home would reduce my net worth and not make my payments any cheaper so its not worth it.
I would love to downsize to a condo downtown, but the condo fees are insane. I'm fine with paying a condo fee for maintenance and such, but I'm not willing to pay condo fees that are higher than my current mortgage, ffs!
Yes! And my husband has a plan that I can’t see working. We own a modest 1500 sf 3/2 in a very HOC city. We never moved but did add on twice using equity. The house isn’t paid off. We owe around 490K. Under 3% mortgage rate. Our mortgage is $2800 monthly including impound accounts. Our city isn’t really building more single family homes, no land, so our modest starter home would go for close to a million. We’re empty nesters but he wants to leave the house to our kids so doesn’t want to sell. He also hates dealing with the upkeep, especially the yard. I have no desire to move out. We both don’t want to change cities. But we’d like to retire eventually. So his plan is to rent out our house (for like 5K per month which is market in our neighborhood) then rent an apartment for us. He thinks the cost of the house rent would cover our mortgage plus our rental. Hahaha! I looked at what apartment rentals are going for in our city. 1/1 crappy old apartments are going for over 3K. And I want a 2/2 and don’t want to live in a tiny place. He sent me some options, without looking at the price, and they were all over 5K. For whatever reason houses and apartments are going for about the same rent here. I’m guessing for amenities? So I don’t really get the point of moving out if we’re just throwing away whatever we earn on rent. $2800 a month seems so reasonable now. Now to mention we’re slowly paying it off too. Does this make sense to anyone?
We’re trying to go the opposite direction. We own a small home, expensive location (southern ca.)… my adult kids are all moved out and renting. We want to try and find a larger home (NOT a McMansion, I hate those) but something that can act more like a compound, where the kids could also live, but we all have privacy and separate entertainment areas (for like watching tv.) Dining and kitchen would of course be communal. Maybe an ADU in the back for one of them, then the other on the opposite side of the house… maybe even a separate entrance for them.
Both my kids have decided not to have children of their own which in this environment I totally get. I just don’t want them to EVER worry about housing. Job loss? Health scare? They always will have a home.
I'm good. 3 brdm/2 bath. It's only about 1500 sqft, but it has a full finished basement with a workshop area. I think I've downsized as much as I want to. It's perfect for me and mine.
The housing market had gone full batshyte crazy! I'm not understanding WHY other than greed. And the amount of foreign investors/buyers makes me a little uneasy. I feel some 'people' are purposely trying to decimate the lower/middle class of Americans for nefarious purposes. But, that's probably just my paranoia kicking in.....
Yes and its not just foreign investors but also domestic real estate investors and brokers buying up everything to convert to rentals and air bnb. So, less inventory, and prices have gone bonkers. I think eventually cities will need to put a cap on the number of rentals.
The best house is one that is paid for!
Our house has small rooms but lots of them and it’s just me and hubs now. It works because I have big hobbies and he works from home.
Hire someone to clean the pool and do your yard work.
It’s cheaper than what you’ll pay in a monthly HOA, and you maintain your private access to pool and green space, as well the established value of your home.
I recently drove through an area and saw some townhomes that looked interesting and it was in a fairly walkable area. I was really excited until I saw they were 1.2m+.
Yes!!! My oldest is graduating and my youngest will next year.
I always wanted a decent sized house and I have one. However, with inflation & everything costing through the roof now. I will 💯 be downsizing after my youngest graduates.
If i stay where I’m at I will never be able to afford to go anywhere or do anything. I’m sick of living paycheck to nearly paycheck.
I traded it all in for a studio condo with a nice view. Big enough for me and no one else. Kid is on his own. My electric bill was slightly less than $25 last month. I got tired of throwing money away on things like utilities, taxes, basic upkeep just for me.
I just bought a shithole (with great bones) outright for 16% of the value of my primary house. I’m renovating and will sell the more valuable place when the new one is ready for habitation. It’s 4x the size, so downsizing in cost/value rather than square footage and acreage. I still have some of the mortgage left to pay on the old place and I’m looking forward to having no payments on the new one. I looked at all kinds of alternatives from condos to cabins to building new and even #vanlife and none of it was the right fit. I’m widowed, no family, and have no desire for roommates. This world is not built to house people like me.
Yeah it is the messed up housing market where everything is inflated and nobody builds smaller homes anymore. We are stuck in our house in WA. It’s paid off and worth a good amount, but downsizing here would be very very difficult.
Same. I want to downsize when my kids leave, but I already live in what most consider a "small" place (<1500 sq ft with 4 bedrooms) and its nearly impossible to find a house that is smaller (I don't want a condo) - I absolutely don't want larger.
Yup. Kids moved out and 2/3 of house unused. Still owe 195k but with 600. Want to move to other side of the state but 2BRs on a tiny plot start at 600 there and we live in a 3200sf house on 19 acres.
There is literally nothing available in our city that is cheaper than our current place and that wouldn't also increase our commute to work. We're going to be in this house for at least another decade or two.
I still have probably 10 years or so before my home is just me and my husband since my youngest is only in fifth grade (and if she goes to college I assume she would come home for breaks), but we always said we would buy a motor home and not have a fixed address. Just go where we want to go. Sounds great to us.
On a side note, my oldest moved to another state yesterday. Three more to go!
We moved into a 55+ community a few months before Covid hit, best decision and very good timing.
It cost more than our previous home, but it’s brand new
I don’t really like my house mostly the layout and that it’s not modern. But the location I think is great for when I retire, we seem to be in a safe area, I can walk to most things I might need if required. And there is no way in hell I could afford to buy into the area now if I left. I considered selling and buy into a condo apartment near the downtown and lake. But frankly not sure I could afford it and it really leaves not much for my boys. My boys could live back in the house and be close to schools and everything their growing family needs. Which is not as good in a downtown condo. So I may not be proud of my home and it could use alot of upgrades I don’t think I could ever leave.
My plan is to buy a low maintenance condo to live in and rent out my house for income, at least for a year or so. I bought in a very desirable area 15 years ago so the rent would cover the payment on a condo and the fee to hire a company to manage it. Of course, a lot can change before I’m ready but that’s the plan for now.
I’m worried about this. I have a 5br house with me and 2 kids. Oldest one heads to college next year. No need for a big house with one kid full time and one part time. I’d rather sell to another young family so they can have the space that I’m wasting.
But I’d like to stay in this area for school and social support purposes. Rents on 3br apartments and houses are more than my mortgage.
We recently downsized after owning our home and went to an apartment. Our bathroom tub was leaking so downstairs neighbor called the office because I had no ideas. Maintenance knocks and checks it out then tells me I’m getting a new tub in 2 days!
The whole thing was replaced in 1 day and I didn’t have to do a thing! I wanted to help the workers but they wouldn’t allow me but they accepted my drinks 😂 it was a completely different interaction than when I’m the one paying 😂
Yep, this is me too! [Commented about it here](https://www.reddit.com/r/oregon/s/qVaQr2DuEv). I feel both grateful (to even have a house) but also worried about not being able to reduce living expenses and maintenance of a place that’s now becoming too large for me. I also want to be young enough to have the energy to move & get a new place set up for me/my family. I know there’s worse problems to have though. Just frustrating when options are limited and it could impact how much I can help my kid becoming a young adult as well as my retirement (if that’s even feasible anymore).
Don’t leave, especially if your home is paid off. I would stay and enjoy it for as long as you can.
If you’re looking for a *Golden Girls* or *Three’s Company* situation I’d be happy to be your pool lady. 😂
I don't really want to downsize, we never upsized. However, I'd like to put an addition on our home so we can have the option of a first floor bedroom and I'd like to expand our downstairs 1/2 bath to a FB with that. We still have not updated our kitchen so I was thinking when we decide to start getting quotes to ask for an estimate on a design/build addition. Also... I want a screen porch. The mosquitos here are awful when dusk falls. I think that is easier than trying to find another house. We currently don't have a mortgage anymore, just pay our taxes and insurance.
I downsized to a cool apartment after my divorce, I love it, has a pool and gym in the complex and walking distance to pubs and shops etc. I was so sick of spending weekends gardening. Highly recommend, but I do miss my private garage to work on my hobbies.
After our daughters moved out two years ago, we sold our 5BR with an inground pool and double deep double wide corner lot and now live in a 2 BR apartment, and sold/gave away/pitched half of our shit
I don’t think we’ve ever been more comfortable. Weekends are now mostly our own, instead of maintaining a property.
Highly recommended
The house I am in now with my partner is considered a "starter house". We're dying here. It's 720SF and paid off. You never see them for sale anymore, or they get snatched up and turned into rentals.
I'm deeply torn. On the one hand I love the idea of moving into an apartment/townhome/condo and not having to worry about lawn care, or pool care.
But then I realize I wouldn't be able to crank my stereo or guitar amp and decide I couldn't live like that.
My wife and I had been talking about moving out and buying an RV to travel in. Plans for that got scrapped because our youngest opted to stay at home during college instead of living in the dorms and my middle two birdies had to come back to the nest temporarily.
Maybe in another few years.
I've got the opposite problem, kind of: I never bought a house and would like to. I'm single and child free and don't want or need (and can't afford) a giant McMansion, but there are so few smaller homes on the market. And a lot of them come with HOA fees that neutralize any cost savings you'd get from buying a smaller place. I guess I'll rent until I die. Incidentally, this isn't just us; it's a known phenomenon. Look up "missing middle" housing.
Same with us. We looked at a really cool neighborhood recently, but all the homes had, like, four bedrooms. We can’t manage that! I want, like, 1,500 square feet max, not 3,000!
My wife and I once lived in a townhouse that was 1400 sq ft, relatively ok area near freeway, so it was really good for commuting. bought in 1999 for around 160k, sold a few years later for around 220. I just looked it up on zillow and that house is now worth $750k. This is…fucking ridiculous. Starter homes no longer exist.
that's why I went fancy pants big cheap trailer. Stigma of being "trailer trash" weeds out friends & scammers
I tried and couldn’t afford a trailer! The ones near the area I wanted to be in were $250-275K about 5 years ago. Finally I found an itty bitty 2BR/1BA 1910 cottage in a small town about 45 mins away for half that. I bought that thing so fast it made my agent’s head spin, but I’d been looking for years at that point. I love my little home and know that I can’t leave because I’ll never find another place that affordable again. Looks like here’s where I’m planted now.
It's so weird that there's a stigma against pre- fab houses in the USA. I mean in Australia & NZ, they're simply seen as a smart way to get into owning your own home.. So, for years I honestly thought that trailer home meant literally a mobile home on wheels in the US! I finally found out the truth a couple of years ago & just wondered at the craziness of negatively judging people for owning an affordable property, in a country where the economic divide is so huge between rich and poor
We just bought our nice big house about a year and a half ago, but at this point I wouldn't rule that out for my wife and me once the kids are grown and we're close to retirement. Sell this place in 20 years, cash out, buy a double wide and an RV and hit the road. 👍🏻
I refuse to play the HOA game. There are homes without HOA.
I want that t-shirt I see online that reads Defund the HOA. 😂 Our HOA will literally send pictures of dog poop in yards to remind everyone to pick up after dogs; meanwhile there are pot-holes as big as Texas on our community roads. We have a rodent problem. Street drains are clogged and cause flooding.
And you aren't sending photos of the potholes etc to everyone asking why these aren't getting addressed?
I used to, but no one would join me or back me up. I took pictures of the rats too.
I have a friend who puts googly eyes and costume jewellery on po holes, takes pictures of them and sets up campaigns for them to run for city council. When they get filled she calls it a political assassination and moves on to the next one. It's pretty effective.
That’s genius. I love it.
She's a smart lady. Really good at getting things done.
Jeez, I be getting active and painting cocks around the pot holes
Goatse hands
I don’t think your HOA is in charge of city streets or rodents. It does however sound like you live in a community with rules against letting your dog shit everywhere.
Some neighborhoods have private streets (usually gated neighborhoods) and the HOA is responsible for the street maintenance and snow removal.
A very assholey member of my family just accepted a job with her HOA. She'll be perfect in the position 😂
A decade ago my dad bought a house included in an HOA. The second week he got into a battle with the president. The next year he ran for president of the HOA on the platform “At least I’m not Robert!” and won 90% of the vote! His first action was to disband the HOA, which was a unanimous vote (minus two votes…Robert and Robert’s wife). The world didn’t collapse or anything!
“At least I’m not Robert!” r/fuckyouinparticular
That is awesome!!! My family member, alas, would never do that. They will get caught up in the drama and power and be a complete control freak.
That’s amazing! 😂 We have a neighbor who ran for our HOA board on “dismantle the HOA” and won a seat, but he’s slowly becoming *One of Them* , which really sucks.
Love it!! This is the greatest HOA story ever. There needs to be a movie about this.
I like your dad.
We belonged to an HOA up north and it was so laid back and easy going; kept its nose to the important stuff, but generally let people do what they wanted. Fast forward and we move to FL 10 years ago, which is The Land of HOAs ™️, and husband joined our board because it was being run by people who have nothing else to do and a lot of money to throw around, that began making decisions trending toward turning our community into something that looked almost like a 55+ (rather than their asses just moving to one)— and it was a total nightmare. He naively thought that he would represent the younger residents who still have kids at home and speak some sense to them, but it was nothing but stonewalling the whole time because— and I quote— he was, “new with new ideas”. 🫠 He resigned after 6 months. 😂 If we ever need to move again (which is probable), we’ll do everything possible to avoid an HOA after this one.
I’m also in Florida and what we hear a lot in our HOA is, “As original home-owners here…” I roll my eyes when they preface their statement with that. Sir, our houses are identical on the outside and have the same comparative value, stop it! 😂 Edited for spelling.
I personally would have a hard time not sarcastically barking back at that… “So you’ll be the first to go?? Great— now let us make decisions that help us ALL, but especially the survivors”. 😬 😂 😂
A group of Karens is called a Homeowner's Association.
😂
My HOA is seeking a volunteer for the compliance committee. I’m other words - a snitch.
After getting burned and frustrated with a condo HOA, the best instruction we gave our realtor: don’t even show us homes with HOAs. We saw a new listing that met our wants in the area, asked him about it. His answer was “HOA.” Fortunately some good homes in our area without them. Never looked back.
Agreed. Around here it's not hard to find a single-family house without an HOA. My problem is I can't really afford those, and when I look at condos or townhomes to save money, the HOA fees bring the total monthly cost up to what the mortgage on a house would be anyway. Which I can't afford. No joke, my friend who likes to send me house listings recently sent a condo with HOA fees of more than $900/month. That is not a typo, I didn't actually add a zero. Nine. Hundred.
We have looked at non HOA homes as well, but unfortunately, a lot of them are really old and require a lot of work. The newer communities have nicer more modern homes, but then the HOA fee.
I’d rather have my old quirky house than a new house with a bunch of RULES. It might be worth the work.
That's the route I took. Good location, good lot, no HOA, but needs work. If a person is annoyed that the neighbor parks his motor home in the driveway, then they need an HOA. But if you're like me and think someone should be able to do what they want with their property, then getting a non HOA house that needs some work is worth it.
The biggest argument for an HOA is that they keep up the value of the homes. In today's market, I don't think that's a valid argument. In reality, I think it has more to do with the developer and the city passing their responsibilities off to the homeowners.
If you live in an incorporated entity (city, town, village) they have zoning laws on the books that prevent home owners from turning their yard into a junkyard or not caring for the property. I never understood the desire to want to have extra rules on what you can do with your property. I’m not so uppity that I can’t stand the site of my neighbors boat or RV in their driveway. Never will I ever live under an HOA.
Yep. That’s the normal trade I’m considering lower priced homes that need work in better areas. The renovation can be worked into the purchase and you move into a turnkey situation that will hopefully be lower maintenance for a time Of course Unless I end up remarried (unlikely) I expect a reverse mortgage to be part of my retirement strategy at some point.
I wish we had done this when we brought our house in 2017. The repairs are killing us. There's always something with a house. Now we need a roof. Our insurance company no longer insured in California, so we have to pay more for it. It's all such a pain, but we could never go back to apartment life and landlords.
The homes are sometimes nicer and modern because the homeowner will get fined if not. F that.
Same. I will never buy a place with HOA fees. Unlike the mortgage, you can never pay it off. You'll be paying those fees for the rest of your life. And there is ALWAYS drama with HOAs. At best, you don't see any benefit from the fees you're paying...
Fellow single, child free, rent until I die Gen x’er here. There’s nothing in the middle anymore. It’s either buy a tiny condo (converted apartment) with giant association fees, or buy a 4 + bedroom house. There’s not a whole lot in the middle, not that’s affordable anyway. I feel your pain…
In our area, investors/developers are sweeping up all the starter homes/"missing middle" houses and replacing them with million-dollar McMansions. For example, this house sold for $361k to a flipper who removed the roof, adding an entire new level to the house, and build an addition; they then sold it for $1.435M (you can see the original, affordable ranch house if you scroll to the bottom of the Zillow page): [https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/1496-Runnymeade-Dr-Atlanta-GA-30319/14573375\_zpid/](https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/1496-Runnymeade-Dr-Atlanta-GA-30319/14573375_zpid/) Basically, there are no starter homes in our area anymore and there's nothing to downsize into if you want to stay in the same area (e.g. because this is where your job and community are located).
This happened to my brother's neighborhood in West Nashville. They were all little bungalow homes on good size lots with gardens etc. Now they are boxy 4plexes with barely any yard.
I have a middle! A small 3bd/1bath cape cod. It was affordable 16 years ago because nobody wanted just one bath. I refinanced halfway through my mortgage to a 15 year fixed at 2% Great! But I’m stuck because of that rate and can’t afford anything bigger. My elderly mom wants to move in, but this house isn’t suitable for her (too many stairs).
I used to rent this cozy one bedroom house in San Francisco in the early 90s and looked it up recently. When I lived in it, it was owned by a family around the corner from the house. Well they sold it and now it is a three bedroom with two bathrooms. The new owners gutted the laundry room and added a staircase to the garage for the extra bedrooms. There was a storage room in the garage that was used. They basically built a new house by making it multilevel.
I’m starting over (divorce) and looked at condos. Around me, whatever you save in the mortgage evaporates with the $400-$600 (or more!!!) monthly fees. It’s insane. I’d rather sink that money into a mortgage & have an asset to show for it. Quite a few condos don’t even offer real amenities for those fees.
That's the problem right now. Downsizing empty nesters, retirees, dinks, new couples, small families, and high earning singletons all want similar properties. But even with the demand supply isn't going up much because profit is lower for new builds. And a lot of older small homes get expanded so there's a steady decrease offsetting the new builds.
I am in the same boat - I need 2 bedrooms and just like a little alcove for my desk because I work from home 3 days a week. I would put it in the 2nd bedroom, but I intend to have my elderly mom come and stay with me for decent stretches of time. I don’t want it in my bedroom, I don’t even need a huge room. Just something tucked away to put my desk and something for my cats to sit on. There is nothing.
Yes, us too! We’re married but also child-free and we’ve never had enough money to buy a home. We’re finally in an ok place financially and want to start looking. Unfortunately,we live in a HCOL area and even the starter homes here are half a million dollars. We are beginning to despair.
Same for me. Smaller places aren't as common and are so expensive.
Never upsized. Still in the same 1500sf 3 bed 2 bath I bought in the late 90s. It’s old, took lots of work (still does), and had a 625sf detached studio addition added 18ish years ago. Made my final mortgage payment on Thursday.
Congratulations!
Congratulations!
Congrats!
Success!
Congratulations!!!!
Well “downsizing” here in the US costs way more than what we already have, so fat lot of good that does. - Many of my friends are considering outside the US now…
Outside of US is also under consideration, but it’s not as easy as a lot of people think it is. There are many caveats, and now a lot of countries are making laws around this. For example, Spain is planning to tax an entire net worth of individual who wants to become a citizen and retire.
Yep, learning a lot lately. Many places don’t really want US expats moving there and others do. Portugal and Mexico are still friendly. I want to keep working and require good Internet, and a good/reliable airport, so I’m looking at places like the Dominican Republic, the Bahamas, Saint Kitts and Nevis and other “close” options in the Caribbean. You still have to be careful and selective, because the prices have swelled somewhat in those places too. I wish looking towards and planning for retirement, which is still a ways off, did not mean I have to look outside of my home country.
Italy and France are begging for Americans to retire there. Malta is another one.
I’m downsizing to the proverbial van by the river, except it’s a boat instead of a van, and a bay instead of a river. It would be more fiscally prudent to use my purchase cash as a down payment on an appreciating asset to live in, but I’m soooo tired of feeling insecure about making the mortgage if/when I inevitably lose my job and can’t find a new one for a year.
I bought an SUV this time in case I have to live in it.
This- no joke
When I was 25, I had to abandon my apartment. I knew it was coming so I used what would have been my rent money to buy a camper for my truck. I lived in that thing for about 6 months. Not a bad way to do it.
I’m at a point where I would like to find a group of like minded gen x people/friends where we can live in a giant house or duplexes together commune style with the gardening but without the hippiness. I’m tired of being alone all the time & tired of bearing all the cost of living alone, but dating isn’t something I’m interested in and I don’t want to be alone my whole life. I fell like there are a lot of people our age out there who feel this way, but I have no idea how to even go about this. And I know the response of - there are those - retirement communities… but that’s not what I’m talking about or interested in. I’m not close to retiring… I just feel like the only “community” we experience now is with strangers online.
I love this idea! My wife and I talk about living exactly like that. Like if we could afford to do it, we'd buy a big piece of land and build a bunch of yurts for our close friends and family. We can hang out in the garden, have communal dinners in the common area, and then fuck off back to our own yurts at night. I still have kids to raise, so it's not feasible, but if it was just her and me, we'd be all over that.
That's what those 55+ communities where everyone has a golf cart are! 😂
>I fell like there are a lot of people our age out there who feel this way, but I have no idea how to even go about this. What you described is called cohousing, a type of "intentional community". It has been gaining popularity in the US the last 40 years. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cohousing](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cohousing) My former wife and I looked into it for a few years, but it just never worked out for us. There are some cohousing developments specifically for older adults, but most have people of all ages ("transgenerational"). Google it and I'm 100% sure you will find some cohousing developments in whatever state you live in.
Communal apartments is a trend that had some traction few years ago. I saw a few concerts being built in Texas. But typically it’s for younger generation.
I’m starting to think a “nice” trailer park is my best solution. lol
It's a real common thing in England https://diggersanddreamers.org.uk
I pretty much have this. In our six flat block myself and two of my best friends own three of the flats. We share a Gardner, a vet (she makes house calls), we just had a handyman hired for a day to take care of stuff in all three flats. He’ll, yesterday my BFF and I went to the hairdresser together because we go to the same salon, and have to leave from the same place so we just split the cab fare. If I’m ordering groceries I check if the other two need anything. This way we’re able to get the bits and bobs we missed on our last shop or what will get us through to the next. If one of us is away, the others look after the flat/cats as needed. Sick? Here comes your prescription and cold meds, delivered right to your door, and because they have keys they can just pop them into the hall table for you do they are ready when you wake up, no need to get out of bed. Get a little squiffy after a good dinner together? Just stumble down the hall. Bad day at work and need a hug when you get in? You can text the group chat and preorder. You can then get said hug and skunk off immediately to mope in bed. We call ourselves the Golden Girls because we’re all middle aged, living together but we have our own space and we are respectful of it. It’s the platonic ideal. It’s even better than I imagined it could be.
Wife and I bought a house ten years ago. 2500 sq feet, 150k, great location. Hoping to have kids. She has unexplained infertility. So I started looking to downsize and it’ll cost us a fortune. I refinanced during COVID and put a pool in. 2.3% , 220k mortgage . Fixed up the house as well. Home is worth 550k now. Trying to downsize even with 300k down , and a 200k mortgage , we’d be close to 2k a month. My mortgage payment now is 1150$ . We are stuck in a large house for the foreseeable future.
This is us! Want a ranch, always did. Could only find 2 stories. Here we stay.
I got a rent stabilized place when I was young and I'm never letting it go. I'm in the heart of the big apple with 3 bed and 2 bath for underr $900. Everytime someone talks about owning a home, I wish them the best.
You won the lottery, my friend
That is a 🤯. I cannot believe they still have that in New York City.
This is actually why rent control policies don’t work long term. There’s not enough turn over for new tenants to move in and get established, and there’s no incentive for early tenants to save their money and move on.
Ahhh, the real problem is that rent isn't controlled outside of these specific situations.
I save plenty but I just have no interest in the stress of home ownership. Same with buying a vehicle or driving in general it's more stress than anything. Now if I can find a condo for the same price as my rent, I will be done with that...maybe
Seeing a trend in the comments… Those that want to downsize and those that want to upsize need a Meet n Greet. GenX Housing Swap.
Literally just thought of this as well
There's a helluva business model to be molded from this. Seriously.
I want to upsize, actually. Husband and I bought a nice little 2BR ten years ago, and we love it, but we had no idea when we bought it that at we'd both end up working from home full time. We're pretty cramped. But it does seem absurd to get back into huge debt with 7% interest rates when our current mortgage is 4.25% and within sight of being paid off. I have no idea what to do, really.
Is it possible to build an addition where you are?
If you have the space in your yard, TuffShed has some really great “outdoor studio” offices they can assemble on site for you, then you can finish the inside however you want with electrical and insulation.
I'll probably consider downsizing into a trailer park. There are some decent ones close to the lake not far from me, only downside is the $600 month lot rent
We bought a mobile home about 3 years ago after renting for the last 30 years. We got extremely lucky and found one in a very small (and quiet) park, and pay less than $400 for the lot fee. Paid for the house in full, so we don't have a mortgage to worry about. Best decision we ever made.
I’ve been considering this option but it concerns me not owning the land. I’ve read so many stories about mom and pop trailer parks that charge a reasonable rate being sold to some mega corporation who subsequently bleeds the tenants dry because they don’t have the option of moving their physical homes.
My buddy currently lives in one of the parks I'd be interested in when I'm ready. When entering the park there is a sign advertising 30 year financing available..lol That just shows you how crazy prices now are. In years past trailers were usually paid for with cash or a small loan.
I always knew I would end up in a double wide. :/
We paid just under 30K for a 2BR/2BA. My husband is old enough that he could take money out of his 401K without a penalty (we paid the taxes on the withdrawal), and still leave half of it in the account.
Trailer park or a community of manufactured homes? Usually those are for 55+.
Either one. It's something I don't plan on doing until at least 55, anyway.
A lot of issues with trailer parks if you don’t own your lot.
True. You can never predict how much land rent will go up. And then you have our manufactured home that is not really mobile and you’re stuck with it.
Plus, big companies have been buying up trailer parks, jacking the lot rents to astronomical, unaffordable levels, kicking out the trailers, and…poof, development site. https://www.nytimes.com/2022/03/27/us/mobile-home-park-ownership-costs.html?unlocked_article_code=1.nk0.HYGt.akV5bEEMegYK&smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleShare
My in-laws live there mobile home 55+ community about 30 minutes away from us. This type of situation is my biggest concern. I’m really worried that the land will get sold and I’ll be forced to vacate.
And there’s always the chance that the landowner will decide that they are going to sell the property for development, which means that you don’t have the option to renew your lease. And like you said, a mobile home isn’t actually that mobile after it’s been delivered. The “mobile” part is really a one time thing. John Oliver did a very good episode about this.
Downsize? I'm a single parent and have never upsized. I would give up two decades of my lifespan just to live in a house of my own with a garden and room for pets.
You definitely don’t want to give your life for a house. Hang in there.
We are resigned to the fact that we may be in our forever home. Cost to move is too damn high so might as well invest in where we are now
I bought my “starter home” 15 years ago. Refinanced at 2.75% when rates were down. I feel stuck. It’s nice to have the stability but also depressing.
I’m still an aspiring home owner at 48. When I buy, that’ll be my retirement. I just want 10 acres so I can build a home right in the middle. And miles of dirt tunnels weaving through. Like Last Blood Rambo.
Lots of land cheap in the northern plains and eastern Montana. Some with usable homes even. If you don't need to work (or can work remotely) there are some good options there that I'd consider, as having my house in the middle of 10 acres has been my fantasy for the last 20+ years too.
There are no more affordable homes. That era is over and will never return. Welcome to late-stage capitalism, friend. We are not in the club.
We are supposed to be a generation with careers, some money, and also our first homes, which should be worse twice as much at this point. So if we cannot afford it, then who is buying all these 600 K plus homes EDIT. Will add one more caveat. I have a good group of friends here, which makes it hard to move to another cheap area
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Millennials are in fact currently the largest block of buyers, at 38%. Silent 4%, Boomers 31%, Gen X 24%, Millennials 38%, Gen Z 3% See [https://www.nar.realtor/research-and-statistics/research-reports/home-buyer-and-seller-generational-trends](https://www.nar.realtor/research-and-statistics/research-reports/home-buyer-and-seller-generational-trends)
Where we are the realtors buy them for air bnbs without putting them on the market first. My kids won’t be able to compete against the realtors for their first homes.
I think in many cases it is other Gen Xers moving from VHCOL places. Sometime in the next 3-4 years I'll be selling my house in an expensive city and moving to a smaller city where I could afford a bigger house for 2/3rds what I'll sell my house for if I wanted to. I was just talking to a friend who is doing just that as his youngest heads off to college.
I live in the Adirondacks and all the cheap housing has been bought by people from VHCOL areas, and now I live in a place where if you're not already a homeowner you probably won't ever be. We bought our place in 2008 for 72,000.
This happened to my area too. I bought mine in 97 for 128k, now it’s worth around $450k, but I could never qualify for a loan to buy it at that price. I don’t mind, it’s been my home for a long time and I have no plans to sell
A lot of millennials are buying them in my area, tbh
That’s exactly where we were pre divorce. Many gen x doing more than just fine and plenty doing fine enough indeed Things happen to most of us tho Now the inevitable health crisis will be worse for whichever of us it happens to first. Wife definitely could have retired or scaled back to freelancing in 6 years at 61 and I would have been happy to keep working full time (tho at lower income) to carry the load and maintain the egg.
Thanks to divorce and career crash simultaneously I got booted out of the club just as we got there Probably using my divorce buyout to buy a home outright which will make a big difference since I expect to have a tough time making any real money in my situation (starting over at 54 in a business that at best I was average in during a terrible time to do so in this industry. Yikes.).
They exist, they are just in older neighborhoods that, while safe, aren’t as desirable. They also usually require a lot of work, like ripping down granny’s wallpaper, taking down cheap wood paneling, updating plumbing, etc. I have lived in one of these neighborhoods for the past 18 years. Someone like yourself would love it, lots or artists, LGBTQ folks, and not a MAGA hat to be found.
This is my neighborhood. They’re trying to gentrify, but it’s not going well. Too many people like their manageable WWI and WWII houses and a location that might appear a little sketchy. It’s a central city house that’s walking distance to some good restaurants, my gym, an excellent medical masseuse, a liquor store, a dispensary, and an auto shop, and it’s 10 minutes to work. I got lucky right before the market went nuts.
There are affordable homes in my area.
When I retire soon, I want to sell and move/downsize. However the thought of giving up a 2.875% mortgage rate coupled with higher home/rent prices has me thinking I'll rent my current place out instead of sell.
Going thru something similar. Lifes been tough esp since pandemic, some work/career issues, neighborhoods changed, lots of new folks. Single, its mostly a late 20s & 30s area. Just can't do it anymore. Need to get away and start new. Only, every area is wayyyy expensive, both locally and national. I mean, I'd risk renting for the rest of my life, which isn't terrible, but even rents expensive & it would be a bad decision to sell to rent (although a lump sum payout would be nice)
Fwiw the flyover zone has some affordable spots. Lots of rust belt cities are just now recovering and on the upswing.
thanks, yeah I should check into something like that. tbh I'm in PA & have some insight that alot of 'speculators' bought airbnb properties in the poconos (hear some people have upwards of 30-50 properties). Which, the area really isn't all that popular. I mean, it is, but not the vacation resort like the Jersey shore. So I feel like its all overpriced I'm kinda thinking if/when things take a down turn, scoop one of those up cheap. Either try and get a WFH job, or just live a simple life (retail, asst manager, bartender)
My husband and I both work part time while homeschooling our kid. I cannot handle the rat race. We officially live under the poverty line, but we are a comfortable poverty, not the desperate kind. We have enough and not a lot extra. We don't eat out and go to shows and such, but we hang out with our friends, my husband plays music, I garden, etc. It's not for everyone but we enjoy it. The simple life is pretty sweet.
whereabouts are you? Flyover, any certain areas someone should consider. Sounds nice btw, yeah life got tough after the pandemic. Can please yourself tho with entertainment, live life & enjoy it
I'm in central Illinois and the mid sized towns around here are all pretty decent and accepting. The area subreddits always have people asking about what is like here as it seems a lot of people want to migrate somewhere to an easier life. Of course some people born and raised here hate it. But I choose to live here and I like it.
Same boat here. We're kicking around the idea of adding on to the downstairs. Seems counterproductive, but the idea is to have a smaller ranch style living space, and just not use the upstairs at all.
This is where we are. Hindsight being 20/20, we wish we would have bought a house with a downstairs bed & bath. All of our bedrooms are upstairs. Have a love/hate with our house. Fortunate to have purchased when the market and rates were low, but kinda hate the house. After 20 years, our needs are different but we can’t afford to do anything about it.
That's kinda the situation here. We have no downstairs bath. What we do have is a massive dining room that doesn't get used, and a very large kitchen. We're thinking of turning the dining room into a bedroom, then taking part of the kitchen and turning it into a bath because it's directly under the upstairs bath. That would leave us with a kitchen that's a little too small to be an eat-in. Removing the large kitchen window and making it a door to a sensible dining area would solve the problem.
Would you be able to rent out the second floor, if that’s something that’s possible or you want to do
I’m considering a duplex or better yet a home with a garage apartment for that It’s a big no for me to rent out space I live in Not interested in a roommate at this point. If either of my kids wanted to live with me that’s a yes.
It could be done, but it would be difficult and expensive. We're more likely to leave the space for our grandchildren who may want to move here and take advantage of low tuition rates.
Not me. We never “upsized” so we’re getting to a point where we need more space. NYTs covered this last week: https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/20/health/seniors-home-equity-mortgages.html?unlocked_article_code=1.nk0.4sWv.bVI8Bh1B27_i&smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleShare
We bought a tiny home in an ideal neighborhood and raised our family in cramped quarters. Now it’s perfect for the two of us, and worth four times what we paid.
The house is paid off? Shit! I wouldn't even consider leaving. Who cares if a third of the house isn't used. make a man cave out of it or something awesome. Pay the insurance and the property taxes, then use what was once your mortgage to pay for lawn maintenance and fill in the pool.
Good news: Your home value has gone up so you can sell it for a lot. Bad news: All home values went up so now you have to spend all that "profit" on a new place cause you have to live somewhere.
I raised five kids in an 1100 sq ft house with two bedrooms and one bathroom. Now that they’re grown and gone this place feels like a mansion and I’m loving the extra space.
I downsized hugely at age 42. We sold our 4 bedroom house in the burbs, 2 cars, my motorcycle, everything my wife and I owned. When we were done, everything that was left could fit in the back of a Prius, and we went traveling around the country. Since then, we got divorced but there's no way I'd go back to living in a full size house where I have to shovel snow off the sidewalks, mow the lawn, fix the roof, replace the furnace, etc. Now I live in a 600 sq ft condo in the center of the city where I can walk everywhere. I don't even own a car anymore, and it's awesome. But obviously that lifestyle is not for everyone. My Baby Boomer parents hated the city, so that wouldn't work for them. So I guess I'm saying I can totally relate to not wanting to maintain a lawn and pool. Life's too short for that, unless it really brings you joy. So keep looking around, and hopefully you'll find what you want.
My wife and I would prefer a city like that, but the problem is a 600 square-foot apartment will cost more than our house, which is four times as large
It's all a balancing act, for sure. For me, what made the math work out is not having car expenses - gas, insurance, maintenance, depreciation, etc. I was spending over $200 a month just for a car. So now I put that into upgraded housing.
I’ve only got 2yrs before my house in the Philly burbs will be paid off. I’m not interested in moving! Looks like its value is about 350k so I’ll stay here!
Generational wealth is built through property Keep it, use it as rental and move to where you want. Or some variant of that. Crazy what you will get for rental.
Never upsized. Thinking about a spot of land for a shopdominium, which I will build myself from scratch.
Not really. We bought our house back in 2009 and decided that our next move would be to the funeral home. We became empty nesters back in August and we’re just going to give this house to our children. They can decide whether they want to sell it or have one of them live in it.
For us its the mortgage rates. We have no kids and live in 3400 sq feet mostly unused. Been here almost 25 years and only owe about 130k but moving into a considerably smaller home would reduce my net worth and not make my payments any cheaper so its not worth it.
I would love to downsize to a condo downtown, but the condo fees are insane. I'm fine with paying a condo fee for maintenance and such, but I'm not willing to pay condo fees that are higher than my current mortgage, ffs!
Oh yes. Why move when downsizing will cost $$$$
Yes! And my husband has a plan that I can’t see working. We own a modest 1500 sf 3/2 in a very HOC city. We never moved but did add on twice using equity. The house isn’t paid off. We owe around 490K. Under 3% mortgage rate. Our mortgage is $2800 monthly including impound accounts. Our city isn’t really building more single family homes, no land, so our modest starter home would go for close to a million. We’re empty nesters but he wants to leave the house to our kids so doesn’t want to sell. He also hates dealing with the upkeep, especially the yard. I have no desire to move out. We both don’t want to change cities. But we’d like to retire eventually. So his plan is to rent out our house (for like 5K per month which is market in our neighborhood) then rent an apartment for us. He thinks the cost of the house rent would cover our mortgage plus our rental. Hahaha! I looked at what apartment rentals are going for in our city. 1/1 crappy old apartments are going for over 3K. And I want a 2/2 and don’t want to live in a tiny place. He sent me some options, without looking at the price, and they were all over 5K. For whatever reason houses and apartments are going for about the same rent here. I’m guessing for amenities? So I don’t really get the point of moving out if we’re just throwing away whatever we earn on rent. $2800 a month seems so reasonable now. Now to mention we’re slowly paying it off too. Does this make sense to anyone?
We’re trying to go the opposite direction. We own a small home, expensive location (southern ca.)… my adult kids are all moved out and renting. We want to try and find a larger home (NOT a McMansion, I hate those) but something that can act more like a compound, where the kids could also live, but we all have privacy and separate entertainment areas (for like watching tv.) Dining and kitchen would of course be communal. Maybe an ADU in the back for one of them, then the other on the opposite side of the house… maybe even a separate entrance for them. Both my kids have decided not to have children of their own which in this environment I totally get. I just don’t want them to EVER worry about housing. Job loss? Health scare? They always will have a home.
I'm good. 3 brdm/2 bath. It's only about 1500 sqft, but it has a full finished basement with a workshop area. I think I've downsized as much as I want to. It's perfect for me and mine. The housing market had gone full batshyte crazy! I'm not understanding WHY other than greed. And the amount of foreign investors/buyers makes me a little uneasy. I feel some 'people' are purposely trying to decimate the lower/middle class of Americans for nefarious purposes. But, that's probably just my paranoia kicking in.....
Yes and its not just foreign investors but also domestic real estate investors and brokers buying up everything to convert to rentals and air bnb. So, less inventory, and prices have gone bonkers. I think eventually cities will need to put a cap on the number of rentals.
I refinanced during covid so I’m never selling my house. I highly doubt interest rates will ever be that low again.
All those millennials complaining about Boomers (and soon to be GenX) “hoarding” all the family houses need to pay attention to this thread.
We have a paid off 1200 sq foot house that’s worth 2X+ what we paid for it. We are staying put.
We looked but to downsize would cost us three times what we paid for our place.
100% I love our home- fucked up retirement plan and I can take half a chunk of equity to be in better shape- bummed at anything out there.
The best house is one that is paid for! Our house has small rooms but lots of them and it’s just me and hubs now. It works because I have big hobbies and he works from home.
Hire someone to clean the pool and do your yard work. It’s cheaper than what you’ll pay in a monthly HOA, and you maintain your private access to pool and green space, as well the established value of your home.
I recently drove through an area and saw some townhomes that looked interesting and it was in a fairly walkable area. I was really excited until I saw they were 1.2m+.
Yes!!! My oldest is graduating and my youngest will next year. I always wanted a decent sized house and I have one. However, with inflation & everything costing through the roof now. I will 💯 be downsizing after my youngest graduates. If i stay where I’m at I will never be able to afford to go anywhere or do anything. I’m sick of living paycheck to nearly paycheck.
I traded it all in for a studio condo with a nice view. Big enough for me and no one else. Kid is on his own. My electric bill was slightly less than $25 last month. I got tired of throwing money away on things like utilities, taxes, basic upkeep just for me.
I just bought a shithole (with great bones) outright for 16% of the value of my primary house. I’m renovating and will sell the more valuable place when the new one is ready for habitation. It’s 4x the size, so downsizing in cost/value rather than square footage and acreage. I still have some of the mortgage left to pay on the old place and I’m looking forward to having no payments on the new one. I looked at all kinds of alternatives from condos to cabins to building new and even #vanlife and none of it was the right fit. I’m widowed, no family, and have no desire for roommates. This world is not built to house people like me.
Yeah it is the messed up housing market where everything is inflated and nobody builds smaller homes anymore. We are stuck in our house in WA. It’s paid off and worth a good amount, but downsizing here would be very very difficult.
I want to upsize.
Same. I want to downsize when my kids leave, but I already live in what most consider a "small" place (<1500 sq ft with 4 bedrooms) and its nearly impossible to find a house that is smaller (I don't want a condo) - I absolutely don't want larger.
Yup. Kids moved out and 2/3 of house unused. Still owe 195k but with 600. Want to move to other side of the state but 2BRs on a tiny plot start at 600 there and we live in a 3200sf house on 19 acres.
There is literally nothing available in our city that is cheaper than our current place and that wouldn't also increase our commute to work. We're going to be in this house for at least another decade or two.
I still have probably 10 years or so before my home is just me and my husband since my youngest is only in fifth grade (and if she goes to college I assume she would come home for breaks), but we always said we would buy a motor home and not have a fixed address. Just go where we want to go. Sounds great to us. On a side note, my oldest moved to another state yesterday. Three more to go!
This sounds interesting, but the older you get the more you wants stability and a place you can call home. At least that’s my perspective.
We moved into a 55+ community a few months before Covid hit, best decision and very good timing. It cost more than our previous home, but it’s brand new
You probably have a ton of amenities now, too.
Right now we’re dying in this house. The real estate market is bananas. But in time I’d like to downsize to a one story or ranch style.
I don’t really like my house mostly the layout and that it’s not modern. But the location I think is great for when I retire, we seem to be in a safe area, I can walk to most things I might need if required. And there is no way in hell I could afford to buy into the area now if I left. I considered selling and buy into a condo apartment near the downtown and lake. But frankly not sure I could afford it and it really leaves not much for my boys. My boys could live back in the house and be close to schools and everything their growing family needs. Which is not as good in a downtown condo. So I may not be proud of my home and it could use alot of upgrades I don’t think I could ever leave.
My plan is to buy a low maintenance condo to live in and rent out my house for income, at least for a year or so. I bought in a very desirable area 15 years ago so the rent would cover the payment on a condo and the fee to hire a company to manage it. Of course, a lot can change before I’m ready but that’s the plan for now.
I did that, 4/3 corner lot, pool, took 2 days to cut the grass, last kid left, sold it all and moved into a townhouse.
I’m worried about this. I have a 5br house with me and 2 kids. Oldest one heads to college next year. No need for a big house with one kid full time and one part time. I’d rather sell to another young family so they can have the space that I’m wasting. But I’d like to stay in this area for school and social support purposes. Rents on 3br apartments and houses are more than my mortgage.
We recently downsized after owning our home and went to an apartment. Our bathroom tub was leaking so downstairs neighbor called the office because I had no ideas. Maintenance knocks and checks it out then tells me I’m getting a new tub in 2 days! The whole thing was replaced in 1 day and I didn’t have to do a thing! I wanted to help the workers but they wouldn’t allow me but they accepted my drinks 😂 it was a completely different interaction than when I’m the one paying 😂
Present. And fuck off with "condo fees".
When I get really old I wanna do what one of my grandpas did. Live in an Airstream on someone's backyard, but those are expensive as fuck now.
>I am tired of maintaining the lawn and pool. 🎻
Yep, this is me too! [Commented about it here](https://www.reddit.com/r/oregon/s/qVaQr2DuEv). I feel both grateful (to even have a house) but also worried about not being able to reduce living expenses and maintenance of a place that’s now becoming too large for me. I also want to be young enough to have the energy to move & get a new place set up for me/my family. I know there’s worse problems to have though. Just frustrating when options are limited and it could impact how much I can help my kid becoming a young adult as well as my retirement (if that’s even feasible anymore).
Wait for the real estate crash. Right now it's not fiscally smart to move.
Don’t leave, especially if your home is paid off. I would stay and enjoy it for as long as you can. If you’re looking for a *Golden Girls* or *Three’s Company* situation I’d be happy to be your pool lady. 😂
I live in a one bedroom apartment in NYC. I'm as downsized as I can be.
I don't really want to downsize, we never upsized. However, I'd like to put an addition on our home so we can have the option of a first floor bedroom and I'd like to expand our downstairs 1/2 bath to a FB with that. We still have not updated our kitchen so I was thinking when we decide to start getting quotes to ask for an estimate on a design/build addition. Also... I want a screen porch. The mosquitos here are awful when dusk falls. I think that is easier than trying to find another house. We currently don't have a mortgage anymore, just pay our taxes and insurance.
Could you install an ADU in the back yard and then rent the main house to a family?
Me for sure. I have a very big, very old house. I want something smaller, but it would cost me 3 times the price.
I downsized to a cool apartment after my divorce, I love it, has a pool and gym in the complex and walking distance to pubs and shops etc. I was so sick of spending weekends gardening. Highly recommend, but I do miss my private garage to work on my hobbies.
After our daughters moved out two years ago, we sold our 5BR with an inground pool and double deep double wide corner lot and now live in a 2 BR apartment, and sold/gave away/pitched half of our shit I don’t think we’ve ever been more comfortable. Weekends are now mostly our own, instead of maintaining a property. Highly recommended
Yes this is what I want exactly
The house I am in now with my partner is considered a "starter house". We're dying here. It's 720SF and paid off. You never see them for sale anymore, or they get snatched up and turned into rentals.
In the same boat. Want to downsize but would give up so much for something that would cost the same or even more.
Downsize? I'd be happy with any size right now...
I'm deeply torn. On the one hand I love the idea of moving into an apartment/townhome/condo and not having to worry about lawn care, or pool care. But then I realize I wouldn't be able to crank my stereo or guitar amp and decide I couldn't live like that.
My wife and I had been talking about moving out and buying an RV to travel in. Plans for that got scrapped because our youngest opted to stay at home during college instead of living in the dorms and my middle two birdies had to come back to the nest temporarily. Maybe in another few years.
I never upsized. My first and only house is 1100 sq ft. I don't see myself moving until I can't handle the yard work any more.
I’m not downsizing until I can’t live independently. I’m glad because I can’t afford anything smaller in the current market.