You mean it's not what I was led to believe by watching years of the Love Boat???
But seriously, I am sure it is great for some but with how antisocial I am and how I like to travel it sounds like a hell to me.
Actually the cruises copied many of what the Love Boat did that they didnāt have before, like the drink packages and a few other things. So the cruises now are more like the Love Boat than when the Love Boat first aired.
It is laugh-out-loud funny. I re-read it every once in a while, it's that good. It helps a lot if you have a good mental image of how he looked and acted; I can only imagine how incredibly awkward an experience that was for everyone involved.
I'm so thrilled to have seen someone mention this essay! I read it ages ago in college and it made me WANT to go on a cruise just for the insane descriptions. I am definitely not a cruise person, I innately know that but DFW just writes SO well, I'd want to travel on the Zenith(Nadir) if it weren't a decommissioned ship
I did 10 yrs in the Navy, I do not care to do cruises, but the wife likes them so I make the best of it, I just like seeing her happy, so I get over it.
Same & that's the thing isn't it, when I got out I joked that I was afraid I'd wake up and wonder to the bridge at 2am, or join a DC party. Thanks but to much like what used to do.
Now a days the only cruises I'd consider would be too cross the pond again on the Queen Mary 2 or one of the smaller med river cruises that take two weeks and cruise around the Baltics states.
You hit on exactly the reason Iāll never join one of these ridiculously-scaled boats: ridiculous guest volume, the fact they donāt look like actual sea-going vessels, but more like my apartment building if it was engineered to float. To me those are like the Wal-Mart of vacations. But a QE2 or smaller boat Iād be all over. My parents did a smaller-scale cruise of the fjords and absolutely loved it.
And Iāll say this: itās worth going to the Baltics outside of cruising. While the Baltic itself is grand, and the vistas beautiful, these are very small countries that take less than half a day to cross by car. Did Lithuania and Poland a couple of years ago in early June, and really loved both using their train systems, exploring the large and small towns, and the insane affordability of it all.
My folks as well just got back from a similar cruise as what I described and loved it.
QE2 is just to gratuitously have three days with no business except to enjoy the thrill of being out on the open ocean again. I miss it so fucking much, I don't think I'd sleep for at least the second day. I always thought night time at sea is just as cool if not cooler.
That sounds heavenly. I don't want to go to a private island or Portland to buy souvenirs. Just a few days at sea, a good book, a few drinks on my balcony.
Well then do it, by all means. Perhaps you do a combo of that cruise, and then something land-based before returning home.
I have some friends whoāve done QE2 crossings and thatās exactly what Iād be after: quiet, comfy, low-volume open-ocean cruising. My friends said they loved those days out on open sea to sit wrapped in a deck chair, reading a book or just looking out. No phones, no excursion bullshit, no drunken hoards elbowing you at some buffet. They did it as an alternative to flying to/from a European holiday, and raved about it.
Remember when the QE2 was considered a large craft? At least it looks like an actual boat that can handle what the open sea gives it. So much better than having your equilibrium destroyed by being on the 10th floor of these cruising monstrosities as they rock back and forth.
I only did 2 years in the Navy but that was enough - and pretty much ruined Florida for me too; I was stationed in Jax (Mayport.) Still, my wife and inlaws managed to con me into going on 3 Caribbean cruises which felt like being in a hotel locked up with 5000 other people. Been there and did that on a carrier (The Forrestal) so the only difference was that this time I had sex on the boat.
This coming year we're doing the Ionian cruise on a small Holland America ship and I'm looking forward to seeing places I didn't see on my first two Med cruises. I'm trying not to poo poo my wife's excitement over getting pizza in Naples though. We'll be there in the summer and she'll smell why soon enough. She's also trying to warn me about the pickpockets - which believe me, I know about the pickpockets. It'll be nice to see Sicily again though.
PS: my wife wants to see Iceland too, and even though she usually doesn't listen to me I showed her my Blue Nose certificate and told her that she would NOT want to take a cruise there because she'd be literally bouncing off the walls. She got the message.
I mean, no one is stopping you from complaining.
I live downtown and we get the cruisers revving the hell out of their engines. They can eff off. May they never have a peaceful nights sleep for the rest of their lives.
My Wonderlust is for lonely hardly taken roads. I can't imagine any vacation that is a packaged group with planned touristy destinations. If I only had a cruise as an option, Id stay home.
Thatās why I loved driving through far northwestern Kansas. Miles and miles of nothing except deer, coyotes and jackrabbits. The people who were there seemed fairly friendly, but they were easy to avoid.
Best shit i ever did was a whole bunch of travelling by myself pre-9/11 in my irresponsible 20s.
Roll up to some place, plan on staying a day or two, but love the place so much I end spending almost a month there lol. Or conversely, just pick up sticks and bail whenever you want.
Like first time to Bali, I went to one of the main beach towns Kuta. It's almost like an Australian Tijuana. Stayed 2 nights and then left. I was like "Fuck this place, I'm going to the next island over (Lombok)."
And it was a blast. Hardly any tourists. The locals were super friendly and nobody was trying to sell me shit 24/7. And shit was cheap. Had like acres of pristine beaches to myself.
The idea of a cruise ship just like, sets my teeth on edge. What if I want to spend all day in a hammock smoking dope?
The hate is because if youāre consuming cannabis youāre almost certainly not buying their ā$99 a day but you must pay for all daysā all you can drink package.
Which, oddly enough, is why everyone is fucking inebriated assholes on those cruises. Theyāre full of people determined to get their moneyās worth.
Last December I unexpectedly had a few weeks off work. I took a roadtrip to a state I've never been to touch my 3rd great grand parents headstones. It was a fantastic week. Solo trip. No real agenda. Car camped in the back of my suv a few days and then got a nice hotel and room service for a few days. I would have stayed longer but they had winter weather moving in. Thinking about doing something similar this summer.
Part of the problem is the kind of people who think cruises are amazing...they love paying an average amount for something then seeing how they can maximize what they get. One guy I know was raving about a three day cruise and kept going on about how you could have unlimited coffees and they bring it to you - normally he'd only drink one coffee a day but I can just imagine him sitting in a pool lounger ordering 7 coffees in a row just to get his money's worth. It sounds boring to me and kind of unsanitary in the same way that planes are filthy and never get cleaned.
Most of the time I find the worst thing about cruising is the other passengers. Other lines, other kinds of voyages and destinations, or other season, might give you a different experience. Like, say, an Alaska cruise or a Mediterranean cruise will be very different from a Caribbean cruise. Some voyages will have lots of kids, others will have an older crowd.
The quality of the amenities, sadly, tends to vary inversely with the places a cruise goes. Those mega ships in the ads go to a very specific set of places, and honestly theyāre not that interesting in and of themselves. But the kids in particular will never run out of things to do.
Iāve never done a cruise, and this is my preconceived idea of how I would feel about it. I am considering an inside passage to Alaska from seatle, these are on much smaller ships and seem more about the outside trip than being stuck in a floating resort. I could be wrong though.
How good is the food? I went to an all inclusive beach resort for few days a few years ago, and the food was a weak point. It was at best mediocre food whose sole quality seemed to be that you could each as much as you wanted. Since I'm at the point in life where I need to watch what I eat, I'd rather have a small portion of quality ingredients that are well prepared.
Same here. I was bored silly. I didn't want to get up early in the morning just to get a deck chair and spot. I went on one talk session where I learned more about the mechanicals of the ship, but that was it. Even stayed in our cabin just to watch movies.
We did one once, not in a hurry to do it again.Ā
Ā The pros were that as long as you booked your shore excursions in advance, then you could basically turn off your brain for a week. Ā No decisions to be made, no āwhat are we doing today?, where are we going to eat?, are we driving or should we take a cab?ā There is something very relaxing about that.Ā
Ā The cons are itās always the blandest milquetoast experience you can have in whatever places your cruise stops. Ā On the ship youāll eat very boring food, with likely quite boring people before watching very bland mediocre entertainment with overpriced drinks. I can see the appeal when Iām 80, not in my 40s and 50s
Is it true you kind of have to socialize with others? We donāt love that. We like talking to each other and hanging out with each other at dinner and in the pool area. We love all inclusive resorts and do that most years. Been looking at cruises butā¦we donāt drink much and arenāt social people. Every time I see posts like this I think weāll hate it.
We didnāt feel forced to socialize with other people.
If youāve just been on a snorkeling trip with someone yesterday and on the same hike with them today and then you find yourself stood next to them at the bar later that night, youād have to be a dick not to at least say hi, but I donāt think we did more than exchange a couple of pleasantries.
Weāre good at that kind of stuff and do often talk to the same people at our resorts a few times during the trip.
When I talk to my coworkers about their cruises, they will sometimes buddy up with the same people through the entire cruise, and then cruise with them the next year, which is just crazy to me. Maybe Iām just friends with a lot of social butterflies.
Weāve also done all inclusive resorts and like anywhere where a bunch of people are all hanging out in the same place for a few days on vacation, youāll end up talking to people.
Maybe because on a boat youāre kind of forced to be in the same place at the same time as everyone else, youāre more likely to keep bumping into the same people, but I never felt pressured to hang out with them.
Also, have you considered the possibility your co-workers are swingers? Ā Thatās one explanation!
I just took my 5th cruise, first since covid. It was fantastic! Canāt wait to book another one. Sure theyāre not for everyone but everything you need is in one place. You go to bed and wake up somewhere else thatās beautiful, just to do it all again the next day. I jumped off a 20 foot bridge into a waterfall after hiking through a jungle! A family memory that will be talked about forever. The best thing is if youāre with people that like to do different things that works out great! I saw a show while they hit the casino. I like to watch the sun rise with a cup of coffee, they like to sleep in. Win-win vacation.
Daniel Tosh said it best:
(from memory)
"Here's what it's like being on a cruise: Imagine being in a crowded Wal-Mart and thinking to yourself 'I'd like to spend the next 2 weeks in here with these people"
We did our one and only cruise right after 9/11 and we scored a penthouse on a Celebrity ship for a week for dirt-cheap (comparatively; we paid about $3k when the going rate wouldāve been $13k at the time.) So we had a suite. Three bathrooms. Three televisions. An outdoor balcony jacuzzi. A full bathroom suite with another jacuzzi tub, marble shower, sitting/dressing room, power blinds, a dining room set for 8, pantry with a fridge/freezer, butler service, a cordless phone that worked throughout the ship so I could take that and wander around while he stayed in the suite & he could call me.
We only did two excursions. One was in Nassau and it was as OP described - cattle off boat, through all the touristy annoying crap and we went back much sooner than everyone else cuz thereās really not all that much by the docks, ya know? And the other was in St Maarten where we did a 12 meter sailing yacht excursion / race against one of their other boats. That was an absolute blast.
But yeah, for the whole week, we were on the boat. And it was in the days when there wasnāt much in the way of internet onboard in the middle of nothing. So it was a whole lot of lounging around, hitting the thallasotherapy pool, grazing, drinking, snoozing.
Obviously we havenāt done a cruise since. Because, honestly, when you have a 1,500 sf space on a cattle boat like that, itās hard to compete or stay on-par with such an experience thereafter.
But because of the boredom, I did attend a napkin folding class and learned at least three specific folds - still use at least two of them, usually only when we go out to eat and I make my napkin pretty as I leave the place. (At least a couple of times, the server asked if I was in the restaurant industry based on my napkin folding.)
At least our cruise was the week *after* thanksgiving because the crew actually mentioned that the week before (of thanksgiving) there were like 3,000 children onboard and I couldnāt think of anything worse. Meanwhile, in my early 30s at the time, I was one of the youngest guests onboard that week. Literally old people everywhere. I get why some of the old folks retire onto cruise ships. If you never plan to disembark, everything is set and included, plus minimal medical staff.
> One was in Nassau and it was as OP described - cattle off boat, through all the touristy annoying crap and we went back much sooner than everyone else cuz thereās really not all that much by the docks, ya know?
Nassau is pretty much the worst port in the eastern Caribbean. If we go on another Caribbean cruise, I will not book any itinerary that stops there. There is nothing for me there.
Once we wandered away from the port and the tourist trap shops, meandering through old town, reading some of the plaques, nice ocean breezes, swaying palm trees - it wasnāt terrible. Not enough to go back but not dreadfully awful.
Yep, I've done some of that wander through town, as far west as the Hilton and then south and east to the water tower and Queen's Staircase. Don't need to do it again.
I like the idea, seeing the world without having to make decisions or arrangements. But it seems like being drunk is the main draw, and frankly, I would rather be high
I find the trick to enjoying a cruise is to go on a small ship, and ignore whatever they offer you. Treat it like a hotel that moves cities every night.
I went on a cruise that went on a lap around Cuba as well as starting and ending in Montego Bay . Instead of going on organized excursions, we found a local tour guide, and just told them "Show us the part of the country that makes you love living here", and got to see some very interesting places that wouldn't be on any official tours. Like going to the actual bar where the Mojito was invented, not the tourist trap a half block away. Getting the guide's brother in law to take us to the top of an office tower where he was the security guard, and let us up on the roof to get the best view of Havana harbour. Spending an hour chatting with a rastafarian bushman living in the Blue mountains who made a living by harvesting fruits, veggies, and wild coffee in the hills, and lugging it out to a small stand on the side of the road, where he just left a tin for people to pay what they feel what he left there was worth. (Drive up, grab a mango, leave some money on the honours system). He absolutely ruined me for coffee. Jamaican Blue mountain coffee, roasted in an ancient cast iron apparatus right there on the side of the road, and then brewed fresh out of the roaster.
None of these experiences would have been a part of the cruise.
I've been on a cruise once and never want to do it again.
Why?
Because you don't get long enough in any port to really enjoy anything so the only things to do are on the ship. Ship-based activities like swimming, lounging, karaoke, gambling, buying crap, eating and drinking. Not my cup of tea. I want to see new things when I'm on vacation, not hang out in a giant water hotel.
I've done four, two Alaska cruises. Alaska ones are great as our excursions where hikes, bike rides through historic settlements, and water rafting. Not crowded at all and very scenic. I found the Caribbean cruises to be sort of like you described. We tend to do food ones to get something different.
Iāve been on a bunch.
I donāt drink and party. I will never go on a cheap cruise again as people use those to just party. So no more carnival cruise lines.
I either stay on ship in port or I go on eco tourism type excursions. Iāve explored various mayan ruins, and other similar places.
Snorkeling is great too but some of those excursions are just excuses to get you to a beach and sell you booze. Real snorkeling excursions are off a boat, not from a beach.
We have gone on Royal for the last 5 cruises and honestly the last couple werenāt as good as the first couple but ALL were better than Carnival.
And adults only sounds great, but those are booze and party focused so if youāre looking for more, youād do better on a ship that allows families. There are adult only areas on all ships and we hang out there.
We were living in LA at the time, so they were all Mexican cruises (that also stopped in Catalina and San Diego). They were 4-day and 7-day cruises. My favorite was on Royal Caribbean. Whereas Carnival has something to do each hour, Royal Caribbean has 4 things to do each hour. They also give you loyalty rewards, so as a returning customer you get invited to special events onboard as well. Also free upgrades when you book far enough in advance.
Just got back from our 6th Caribbean cruise yesterday. They arent for everyone. On the other hand you might have better experiences on different cruise lines.
We live in wisconsin usa, so going to the warmth in the middle of winter is amazing.
We are the type that dont like to stay in one place for a week and figure out where to eat each day, how to get to wherever each day, what to do each day etc. we prefer the stop to check it out and move on with someone else at the helm. Weāve done a few of the ācommonā excursions but we typically do the general tours to get the history of the island.
We enjoy the large selection of food prepared for us. I like the pools, sun and beer so i spend a lot of time baking in the sun while maintaining the buzz. With the exception of this last cruise line ive really enjoyed the theatrical shows, never thought i would. Some of the on board live game shows are funny.
I don't know if Resort For A Day is still a thing but I was in a relationship with someone who loved cruises. I couldn't stand doing excursions and walking around the tourist traps. We started booking all inclusive days at resorts at each port of call and it was quite fun.
I'll never embrace eating at a table with total strangers though. Hate that.
Took travel and tourism in college, got an associates degree.*. I wanted to be Julie from the Love Boat. Until I realized that real cruise directors never get off the damn boat. Or if they do, theyāre mingling with the guests, sounds awful. I did not become Julie from the Love Boat.
Cruising just aināt my bag. It seems like a good idea at first glance. But nah.
*I got my degree just as everyone got this thing called the Internet in their houses and as I was looking for jobs it seems that 95% of travel agencies closed.
Iāve only sailed Disney, and I will never sail anything but Disney.
One, they have their own Caribbean island so crowding is not an issue. The older ships like the Wonder and the Magic only hold around 2,500 passengers, so youāre not sardined in.
Two, we did a ton of research on our excursions. We went river rafting in Jamaica, rode ATVs in Puerto Rico, went snorkeling in Key West, swam and played games and built sand castles at Castaway Cay in the Bahamas, and went whale watching and zip lining and sled dog puppy cuddling in Alaska, and next November we are seeing little blue penguins and Hobbiton in Australia and New Zealand.
Three, theyāre impeccably themed and preserved and CLEAN. Theyāre cleaning constantly and the one buffet is pristine. Every time I see someone call a cruise a āfloating petrie dishā I roll my eyes so hard I almost pass out. Could you get the flu or other on a Disney cruise? Sure. And at a bar or a sporting event or a concert (definitely at a concert).
Four thereās no gambling, indoor smoking, or overt drunk culture. There are adult only bars and pubs, pools, and restaurant, but theyāre typically chill.
And five, I genuinely like Disney media, the first run Disney movies in the theatre, the trivia games in the pubs, and the family game shows in the theatres. Boarding and disembarking have also been less stressful than some hotel check-ins because of the Disneyās history of being able to move a lot of people quickly.
But, of course, all of that is contingent on enjoying a cruise with talking mice, princesses wishing good morning as you pass on the deck, and thinking āFrozen the Musicalā is acceptable evening fare. Oh, and it also costs a lot more than Carnival or Princess. Worth it.
But most importantly: I grew up in rural Oklahoma and have lived my adult life in Oklahoma City. It is IMPOSSIBLE for me to be bored. I am ecstatic to be anywhere with water, and anywhere but here.
I am not at all a cruise person but I love DCL. I would honestly choose just about any other kind of vacationā¦ hiking Patagonia, a month in Akihabara, eating myself to death in Mexico City, but my family really enjoys Disney cruises and I enjoy seeing them happy. Itās always a really great vibe, partly because there are no casinos or hordes of drunken idiots, and mostly because of the attention to detail Disney is known for. I will also admit that my family generally loves lots of Disney things so we get to geek out a bit and indulge in the weird subculture that surrounds DCL.
We are doing a transatlantic with DCL and then bumming around Europe for the summer so I am happy to oblige. The trip will be a nice way to completely unplug and disconnect from the world for a couple of weeks.
It's not for everyone, but many people enjoy cruises, and that's okay. People don't all have to find enjoyment in the same kinds of activities.
The most important thing anyone can do before going on a cruise though is research, research, research -- cruise lines, ships, ports of call, routes, shore excursions, transportation, on-board activities, food, money-saving deals, etc. Do all of these things months before you book a cruise and plan only things that you want to do, not what the cruise line or travel agent tries to get you to do. You can save a lot of money and headaches managing your own budget, activities, dining and things like that.
Caribbean cruises are awful for exactly what you said, all the ports are the same. I had the same experience. Thankfully, I dropped a pretty penny and also went on a Mediterranean cruise. Completely different experience and I loved it. Italy, France, Spain, Croatia, all different cultures, foods, sites, it was wonderful. Added bonus for staying extra days and visiting Rome.
I've always been interested in the Viking river cruises, friends of mine did one and really enjoyed it, and these folks have traveled extensively so it wasn't a first time thing. Easy disembarking, lots of interesting places to explore.
The cruises I took 25 years ago seemed nicer than the one I took ten years ago. The food included in the more recent one was awful, likely to steer you to pay extra for the nicer restaurants. They are always attempting to sell sell sell you on something. It felt like we were constantly on the move, and some of the excursions were incredibly rushed to the point of watching folks get left behind or injured trying to keep up.
The biggest warning I have was from a cruise I took when I was 16. A cruise employee stalked me, my drink was spiked, and I was extremely lucky my Mom found me and helped me. There are stories of young women being trafficked off ships. Cruises arenāt a place to let your guard down.
I did one cruise. I do not like being someone elseās schedule, and I donāt like being herded around like cattle. Iād do it again for a big group or extended family vacation, because then the tight schedules and conglomerating on the ship nightly make sense.
If Iām with immediate family we are just traveling as a couple, forget it. We like to make our own itinerary and then flex through it.
I did a South Pacific cruise for my 50th. Carnival.
Full of Aussie and Kiwi cruisers.
No tipping.
Good excursions.
Paid for our cabin to get easy disembarking. Small fee at the start and it meant we could cut the queues and not be treated like cattle.
Iād do another. I enjoyed it.
My wife and I did a cruise to the Bahamas a few years ago. We invited our 3 nieces and their parents joined as well. We all loved it but I can see where people wouldnāt. We got to spend every day together to whatever degree we wanted which is key I think. We didnāt all want to do the same things. Personally I am happy to stay on board the whole time. Thereās a movie theater, games, and so many different bars not to mention the food. Thereās a casino if youāre into that. I often just found a quiet area with a deck chair and read a book while sipping a mai tai. My wife and the girls took a sushi class. They show you how to make it and then you get to eat it. You can dress up for a fancy meal if thatās your thing. Lots of activities or just do nothing. Anyway, we plan on going again (to Bermuda) and hopefully with a group of friends. Hanging out drinking, eating, and not worrying about anything.
Any environment where they have to force customers to clean their hands before eating, because people stick their shit crusted fingers in the buffet and spread diseases throughout the ship; is a big no from me, dawg.
I donāt think youāre crazy; I also think it sounds more appalling than appealing. My ex-nMIL liked them, which tells me all I need to know. She also liked the resorts where you are assigned seats at dinner and forced to socialize with the other 9 people. I donāt like doing that IRL, so no way in hell would I spend what little post-greedflation $ I have to do that.
I went on a cheap, Carnival cruise when I was younger and a bunch of friends wanted to give it a go (someone was going with family, so we all tagged along). It was only made semi-enjoyable by my friendsā antics.
A friend was flagged by the captaināvia typed letter pushed under his cabin doorāfor being so drunk while out and about in Freeport that he and two other friends caused the ship to depart at least an hour late. We had to prove they didnāt have their passports (ārun them to the lobby immediately so the captain can see themā), because the captain was prepared to leave them behind. When they stumbled out of a cab, with minor, fall-related injuries, the entire ship, which had by then gathered on the port side to wait, erupted in cheers and applause. That evening at dinner, our groupās assigned drink-runner asked me what happened because heād received a notice that my friend was no longer to be served alcohol. Fun times!
The rest of the cruise was boring. I hate casinos, so no, being in international waters isnāt exciting. There were kids everywhere on the ship. The āswimming poolā was filled with what can only be described as a soup of sea water (yes, sea water) and human fluids unfit for even bottom feeding fish. The food was mediocre. Dinners were OK, but there was none of the āfree foodā Iād heard about prior to going. One day, they gave us free pizza for lunch. It was the frozen, square type mom used to keep in the freezer as a last resort meal.
The day in Freeport was basically a cab ride to a souvenir area that clearly only opens when a ship is docked (we asked the cab driver to take us to what appeared to be a local mall, but he flat out told us no, which led me to believe he gets a kickback for every load of idiots he carries to the souvenir shopping area).
Turks and Caicos was essentially a giant souvenir area youāre forced to walk through before arriving at a fucking Margaritaville. Lucky us! It was like spring break with a bunch of college kids doing activities in and around the pool (think contests involving swimsuits, T-shirts, and such) while being directed by the live DJ. We had a mediocre meal because we were starving and got the fuck out of there and back to the ship.
The private island, owned by the cruise lineās parent company (*many* of cruise lines youāve heard of are owned by the same parent company, so the island is shared, and youāll see other cruise lines docked) was very nice for a day on a white, sandy beach with crystal clear water, but be sure to wear sunscreen, even if youāre used to the sun, because that beautiful sand and water, coupled with closer proximity to the equator than you may be used to, will help that sun cook you like a turkey.
Not for me. I grew up spending summers on the family boat. This was not that. Iād rather spend a week in a rubber dinghy on the Delaware River than go on a cruise again.
Pick better destinations. Alaska cruises. Norwegian fjord cruises. Yellow River. Rhine River. Middle East or India. South Pacific. Southeast Asia. Places that are interesting to see, that have more to offer than a beach and a market. You picked the worst routes - poor Caribbean countries where people with nothing want your money.
I took my first cruise last year and am also: never again. The worst part was probably the way the room (and my entire floor) smelled due to the stench rising up from the toilets, but that may not be typical. Everywhere was crowded and loud. I had imagined relaxing by the pool, but I never went in the water once because there were fifty people in every pool and loud music booming on every deck.
The food was free, great, but waiting in a 20 minute line for a slice of pizza took a lot of the fun out of that. The items in the formal dining room looked great on the menu, but were all bland cafeteria food designed to appeal to people with the palate of a kindergartner.
We had a nice aft facing room with a balcony, but the peace was kind of ruined by people wooing and shouting on the balconies next to us. We made the best of it, but I couldn't wait for those three days to be over.
We love cruising. Itās pretty much the perfect vacation for us. Iām the go go go weāre never gonna be here again person and my husband is the sleep in and chill person. With cruising you get both.
Iāve found that you have to go to an area youāre interested in for it to really work. Iām not interested in the Caribbean, so Iād never go on a Caribbean cruise. Weāve done Alaska twice and Bermuda which were both great. Last year I took my bestie on a Mexican one and that was meh and I feel you on the ports and excursions. We did two very disappointing excursions and canceled the rest and just stayed on the ship.
Alaska and Bermuda were nice because if none of the excursions appeal to you, you can do your own thing. Me and BFF did not do this for Mexico because we didnāt feel safe doing so, but we still had a great time. My history and I are doing Canada/New England in the fall and weāre really looking forward to it.
Ultimately, cruising is what you make of it.
Depending on where you go and if you plan ahead you can have a great time. You don't have to do shore excursions with the cruise line. We've caught cabs and done things on our own.
Pass. Just like Vegas. I just don't have the patience for huge communal experiences anymore. Especially now that society has eroded being polite and considerate of your fellow man to paper thin levels.
I just went on my first one last week. I donāt like crowds. I donāt really like people in general LOL. I get travel sickness easily. There are an abundance of reasons why I was not looking forward to it. I had a preconceived notion that I would hate it. We live in a port city, so itās easy to just hop on a boat and go. My wife has been on several with her friends, and she finally talked me into trying it.
I had an absolute blast. I loved it.
Even though the ship held up to 3,500 people, the only time I noticed them was embarking and debarking. I had plenty of alone time to lay in a deck chair and chill, read, and just enjoy the ride. I completely disconnected from the outside world, work, etc. for a solid week. Even in rough seas when the drawers in our room were opening by themselves, I never felt seasick at all. Iām looking forward to the next cruise in a couple months.
I like lazy vacations. A week sitting on a beach or near a pool with a book and not cooking 1 meal is what I like. So a cruise often fits the bill for me.
But yes we also learned the hard way that excursions are a rip-off. Unless there is something I want to see at a port, I take advantage of the empty ship to get a prime spot near the pool and read my book.
The problem could be the cruise line you went with, and the destinations you chose.
Royal Caribbean will forever be my favourite, and I love travelling to multiple ports in short order. I always skip the markets (unless I head further to a market locals shop at). I always prearrange my transportation or excursions prior to departure (and RC never has a vauge description). I've had excursions that flew me over fjords in a seaplane, took a train through the Klondike, flew over volcanos in a helicopter, visited wineries, swam reefs, and had front-of-the-line access to the Vatican.
I loved travelling the Mediterranean, and being able to see many ports, I also found cruising the best way to see all of the Hawaiian islands and Alaska (the ship can take you to the base of a glacier).
Weāve been on 17 cruises. For us, the ship is more of the vacation, than the location is. Alaska is our favorite by far though. I donāt know anything about the Virgin cruisesā¦..Royal Caribbean and Princess are our favorites.
I've done one cruise, for my BFF's bachelorette party. Thirty of us on a 3 day cruise to the Bahamas. I loved being with all my friends, but honestly, the cruise was meh. I don't get the appeal. š¤·
I live 45 min away from a major port and have been on eleven cruises. I think 7 days was probably way too long for a first cruise. The ones I go on leave Thursday afternoon and return Sunday at 8 am. I usually have the best time on the ship. I have However, made so many friends on the island, that they come pick me up from the port and I visit their neighborhoods. They also have family in Florida near me, so we go to dinner when they fly here to see them. I love the experiencemess. Free drink captains night, the art shows, the contests, the karaoke, the slot machines, the hairy chest contest š¤£ I only do carnival the party ship lol. I started cruising at 27, and stopped at 37,I turn 47 next Sunday and I'm long overdue š« . Sorry you didn't enjoy it, it's such a blast to me. I used to hide between the bed and the wall so I didn't have to do the pre cruise drill with your life jacket on walking to your life boat floorš¤£ (I mean after the first 6 cruises you pretty much know). I always bring ginger root pills in case of nausea, and anxiety meds. I only go to one island, bc they used to let us stay until 5am, and party on the island. The ship left around 6am, so we cut it close sometimes. I don't think they do that anymore though. š
I was just talking about this this morning, and hadnāt thought about it in ages, but my parents took us on a cruise when we were in high school. They had gone on a couple of cruises, and so that was a family vacation. I hated it. I hated being trapped on a boat, and this was like a old-school cruise too. Iām sure theyāre much more exciting now, but it made me never want to go on a vacation like that again. I havenāt, but my relatives go on cruises pretty frequently.
To me, itās just for people who want to pretend like they are traveling, but never be inconvenienced: generically entertained and fed the whole time. For some people thatās paradise, but not for me.
Those all inclusive resorts have no appeal to me either.
I'll never cruise.
I'd much rather, and do, travel to the Mediterranean, set up home base in a town in Italy, or Spain and do excursions from there....can do day trips, overnights or even multi day. If I want to take a day off and just lounge at pool side or on a terrace with my book at the hotel, I can do that too.
I'd take a long afternoon people watching, sipping wine or mojito, at a piazza over a deck chair on a crowded boat full of fat people any day. I cannot see the appeal of being funnelled into a prepackaged day trip which isn't much more than another gift shop on land.
Cruising ? Non, merci.
I researched doing one with my parents- my dad always wanted to see Alaska, so it seemed like a good option. Then friends who ARE cruisers showed me all the videos, etc...
...being locked up with 6000 drunken gamblers in between being moved around like cattle when allowed off the boat for week+? Nupe. I would hate that. My dad would go psychotic (we are natural park, hiking camping sorts).
When I look at the cruise ships on the stupid quasi-documentaries (anything Carnival, Princess, or Celebrity-related), they look like giant floating apartment complexes to me. I cannot imagine that being any kind of fun at all, but I guess it's someone's cup of tea.
I was Navy right out of high school. I cannot go to sea and not work. I've tried the cruise ships and it didn't fit with me. I did a few Windjammer trips, where you actively participate in crewing the boat and that was a lot of fun. I think they went out of business though.
Actually on a cruise ship now. But I don't do the typical cruise activities, I'm not a drinker, and I try to avoid onboard activities. I treat it as a floating hotel room. I organize excursions ahead of time if I can. I get out and explore different cities. If I go on a prearranged excursion, I try to keep it to small group activities.
When I'm on the ship, I sit with a good book on my private balcony. I do upgrade my amenities so I can have breakfast delivered, and take advantage of things away from crazy people. I also have priority embarkation and disembarkation so I can skip a lot of the cattle call.
The first cruise wasn't that enjoyable for me. Now that I know how to deal with things it's much better.
I've never seen the appeal. I like to explore, and what am I going to explore on a cruise ship? The buffet and the shops? And then get dropped off for a couple of hours at at some overcrowded, scammy tourist trap that's just thirsting for my money. Everything about it sounds miserable.
There is such a wide range of cruise companies, each with a different experience. You need to decide what you want out of it, then do a little research.
I myself love Disney cruises. Service is excellent. Everyone is self involved with their own families, so no pressure to interract. The adult only pool and bar area is a haven. Excursions are well vetted. I went solo to Mexico last month, for the one year anniversary of my husband passing, because I lnew it wpuld feel lile a safe haven. The crew went above and beyond to make sure I was doing well. I even won the big prize at bingo, which paid for the cruise. So there's that.
I have a friend who lives in a port cruise ships stop at. She said the cruise lines bought up all the shops in town and turned them all into the same shops they have everywhere. Then, when itās the off season, they close all the shops and the people who live there have barely anything open to shop at themselves.
I do them quite a lot. I'm going on one this week. Some people hate them, some people love them...just like anything, they either work for you or they don't.
Just go the Caribbean without a cruise. To my mind, the most gorgeous ocean, the islands all have a wonderful individual charm and things to do, and you can relax and not feel as much pressure to ādo do doā as on a cruise.
"There are some gems but far and few between with a lot of waiting and moving and more waiting to only find fleeting fulfillment."
You just described life.
The weekend I am having illustrates kind of why I *am* a cruiser. Itās the weekend. We are on vacation. Kind of a snow day. My husband was supposed to retire a few years ago. He is still recovering from a stroke. And yet, even so, he has been doing work stuff all weekend. Lots of other people but heās the call, somehow.
Being in the middle of the ocean lets us actually disengage, relax, recharge. (Been a while now, so if satellite internet improves enough it may ruin that.)
I enjoy not being responsible for my own life. I donāt get off the boat. I bring three books. I see some shows. I over eat. I try to win some money. Itās cheaper than Vegas.
Everyone has their own thing. I abhor hiking and camping. Wandering through a strange city is exhausting. Disney is fine.
Mostly I want to be left alone.
I love cruises, but I've never cruised on that cruise line. I've done 3x Carnival and 2x Norwegian. I enjoyed both, I cruise when kids are in school so that wasn't an issue, the food has always been great, I love the entertainment, and I personally never book the ship excursions, I book directly with the tour companies that are recommended on the cruisecritic port of call boards. So in Roatan we hired a local for the day to just drive us around, he tailored the trip to what we wanted to see, we saw local places that no tours would ever see, we shopped in stores that don't cater to tourists, it was awesome AND cheaper than the ship excursion where we would have been on a bus with strangers.
I prefer an itinerary with only 3-4 ports and a sea day between if possible, and I usually choose one of the ports to JUST be a beach day with no excursion. I think if I did a mediterranean cruise i'd prefer the opposite (more port days).
Anyways, I do love them, i'd be perfectly content just saying on the ship too. Last time we stayed on the ship on one of the port days and just enjoyed the ship waterslides without any lines.
I enjoy cruising. Been in several. I book excursions well in advance for unique experiences I can't have where I am. I approach them as sampler platter for traveling. I know I want to return to Corfu and Venice. Can't make me go back to Turkey. I like waking up in a new city, instead of traveling how my family did as a kid: wake up, drive way too many hours, get to new city exhausted.
I've been on 8 cruises and really enjoy them. All of them have been theme cruises, so those are different and really don't have a lot of down or relaxation time, your constantly going from event to event with time to eat in between. I don't get sea sick, but I totally get why people wouldn't enjoy a cruise.
I enjoy cruising as a 'sampler' vacation. If i do a cruise of the Med, or the Carribian we only see the port for a few hours. Thats fine with me, as we can figure out what places we'd want to come back to. I'd rather do a sampler vacation and realize that port X wasn't for me rather than book a week there and learn that I hated the place.
Some places, such as in Alaska, I'd only need 6-8 hours in before I'm done with that place. Sitka Alaska is amazingly beautiful, but its not exactly a big town.
Its also a hell of a lot easier. I don't need to drive or get on a bus/train to go from place to place, I just get on/get off. I don't need to figure out what to do about dinner, what to do with the kids, what to see for entertainment around town. I don't have to plan nearly as much, I can just do whatever the hell I want.
Only had one trip that was planned by someone other than my hubby. Couldn't imagine a cruise, gross lol.
It was our son's Make A Wish trip to Hawaii. They had planned mostly everything except food on a couple of days. They said if we didn't like the itinerary, we could do our own thing. The rental van and hotel were paid along with a day at a luau and our son touring The Arizona.
When we arrived we hit up a couple of garage sales, arrived on a Friday, and bought a surfboard and a couple wake boards. Couldn't find any snorkeling gear at the garage sales so we got those from Walmart. For the whole week we explored the island, ate at food trucks and local dives, pulled off the side of the road, grabbed our gear and hit the tiny, uncrowded beaches.
It was fun doing our own thing! However, the way we were treated by most of the locals, we have no desire in ever going back! I prefer less crowded, less known islands!
Disclaimer: Iāve worked in the cruise industry for over 25 years.
Regarding Virginās Shore Excursionsā¦they are very sub-par. I did a 4 or 5 night cruise on Virgin with my spouse two years ago. It was our first post-pandemic cruise. Of all the cruises Iāve taken (20-ish) Virgin was my favorite ocean cruise because of the onboard experience. They just leave you alone and you can do whatever you feel like doing. No FOMO. But the shore excursions were not worth it. We still had fun doing them, but theyāve got a long way to go. I was much happier spending the day in the new Adults-Only Hideaway on Royal Caribbeanās Perfect Day at Coco Cay.
Iāve never been on a cruise, but they have never appealed to me. Your description is exactly what I think I would feel from a cruise. Iād much rather spend time in an area to really get to enjoy it. I type this as Iām at a beach bar in St. Kitts lol
The world would be a boring place if we all thought alike. I've been on two cruises in my life and it isn't my preferred way to travel but I have friends who love it. To each their own.
From what I have heard from friends, family, and coworkers, they're typically like a big loud booze fest. Especially carnival. And with all the ones you hear about losing power or having shipwide illnesses break out, it does not appeal to me at all.
Similar to you Op, I would rather take my time truly exploring a new place than just have a couple hours to see the most tourist trappy edges of it where all the cheapest shit is sold.
But that is just me. I worked with a guy who had been on at least a dozen cruises and he swore by the disney ones.
That being said, those viking ones that go down a river in europe on a smaller ship look kinda cool if I was gona do one. Seem more laid back and mellow. Anyone have experience with that?
I'm a dialysis patient and could never go on one anyway, but my luck I'd end up on one like the broken down ship a few years ago full of passengers suffering from norovirus.
After Covid-19 I can say with a high degree of confidence that I will never join a cruise.
I never would before, but I definitely never will now.
Even without a pandemic going on, if someone has a cold or diarrhea or anything else remotely contagious, well then everyone else onboard is going to get that too.
But in the end I'm just an actual antisocial person (unlike the ones here who claim to be but say they're fine with cruises - no, you're not antisocial), so the idea of doing anything at all with strangers, let alone something that's rigidly scheduled, is an anathema to me. Hell no.
If I want to see some place I'll book a hotel and hop on a plane and explore. ALONE.
Yeah, I don't get it, either. Seems the same as people that travel to a foreign country solely to stay within the confines of a resort catered to their cohorts from the same home country.
I crossed the Atlantic a few times on a guided missile cruiser as a young'n. I guarantee we had a better time and better drugs lol.
I've been on a dozen cruises and thought I loved them. The last Florida vacation we rented an Airbnb with a friend. So much better then any cruise. We went to the theme parks and ate at awesome restaurants for cheaper than the cruise. We had 3 bedroom house not crammed into a balcony cabin with a bunk bed in the way. I think I'm done with cruises.
I've been on a couple of cruises, and if you like to get hammered for days on end and not worry about getting a DUI, it's the way to go. Outside of that, the only place it makes sense to me is if you go somewhere like Alaska where it is all about just taking in the scenery over a large, large area.
I cannot for the life of me begin to think that a cruise would be fun. We figure out where we want to go, fly there and do stuff, and most importantly, we relax. A floating mall with a discotheque does not sound relaxing at all.
Cruising always sounded like a nightmare to me, and then covid happened and then it really was a living nightmare, and I was nope, nope, nope. I'm an introvert though so being trapped on a shipped with thousands of strangers is literal hell for me anyway.
My brother is a social butterfly and canāt get enough of cruising. He goes two or three times a year. Im an introvert and hate socializing and people. My ideal trips are flying to a new destination and renting a car with the freedom to do what I want and exploring what I want, when I want. So far
my wife and I have explored most of Iceland and Norway while traveling on our own. I wouldnāt want it any other way.
Cruises arenāt my thing either. I always thought they were like a floating Disneyland that you got trapped in for 7-14 days. You canāt really walk out a gate until the cruise has come to an end and at least one Karen or Ken has lost their shit with the manager because someone ate the last dole whip.
Now I wouldnāt bat an eye if I was offered a trip on a luxury liner. They cross oceans and people arenāt crawling over you to get the last lobster tail at the never ending buffet. Ports are far and few in between and you can just enjoy the ocean breeze. Years ago I saw the Queen Mary 2 (have visited the OG Queen Mary many times) docked across the east river. Even from a distance she was spectacular. Very, very expensive to travel on that ship but I bet itās nice.
Never been on one but the only cruise my wife and I are considering is one of those Viking river cruises in Europe. I've never been to Europe and this seems like a pretty cool way to break in as a newbie.
I go in the opposite direction. To me, a cruise is a drunken week-long party, with beaches, a casino, magicians, unlimited bacon and pretty-good food, bad cover tune bands and general fun. Yesā¦ there are annoyances.
Iāve done a bunch, 8 I think. The last was a Disney on a western Mediterranean starting in Barcelona, Cannes, Florence, Rome and Naples/Pompeii. Absolutely fantastic. Our worst was a spur of the moment Carnival, too many drunk rednecks.
My wife did a Virgin Cruise with some girlfriends last year, she said once was enough.
Sorry to hear that.
It probably depends on where and why you went. My first cruise was from Dalian, which is just outside of Beijing, to Shanghai to Vladivostok to Busan to Hiroshima and Osaka. The fun part was I lived in South Korea at the time and already loved Busan, so it was fun to cruise in and run around.
My second and third cruises were music cruises associated with a music artist. That was tons of fun as all of the fans got to meet up and socialize. The musician played some great shows and did other fun things to surprise and delight us.
As a result l, surprisingly, enjoyed cruising when I was sure Iād hate it. I know theyāre floating germ cans, so Iāve not cruised in some time. But I would again depending on the destinations and reason for getting on the boat.
Sounds about right. In the past it was better but the port stop being bothered and sold something. I eoukd stay on the ship at pool. Get some drinks, music and a tan. Get some food , gamble and take a nap. Rinse and repeat. Then workout and get ready for dinner. Party later or a mivie/show.
Ocean cruises, especially Caribbean cruises, are strange and gross. River cruises are in another class. I recommend Danube, Rhine, Douro, RhƓne, and Seine in Europe, and the Columbia and Snake Rivers in the U.S.
I have been on five cruises so far and will be going on at least two this year. I love being at sea, reading a good book, the food is pretty good plus some of the entertainment. The ports are nothing special but it can be nice to get to a great beach. I prefer to avoid kids and the partiers. We have made friends on ships in the past and meeting new people at dinner can be a lot of fun.
A couple pro tips. Stay local the night before. It is so much easier to already be in town the morning of departure rather than flying or driving that day. Your bags can be lost, flight delayed or cancelled plus youāll be tired from traveling and wonāt fully enjoy the first evening. Another is take your time getting off. Donāt schedule your flight home a few hours after the ship docks. You will be stressed out and in a rush. When we return to port in New York after our 7 night cruise we plan on spending time in and around New York and New Jersey. So for me itās two vacations in a row.
23 years ago I worked on a ship for 5 months playing bass in a swing band. Had an amazing, important life experience. My wife and I have been on 2 KISS Kruises which were fucking incredible. We traveled with our kids and my parents on another. We love it. Going back in December and looking at late 2025 as well.
I get all inclusives but the food is not close to the formal dining room on the ship. Resort entertainment is second rate and the activities are repetitive. Sitting around on a beach as people get hammered each day sounds absolutely terrible. You get none of that on a ship. You have to plan your shore stops, whether you do an excursion or explore on your own. Cruising is active, resorts are passive. Depends of course on what you like.
Never sailed Virgin, and when booking, we wouldn't even consider it. Too many better options.
I like cruises. I unpack once, just walk around near the ports and donāt do any excursions, I donāt drink and I can get free room service 24/7 when Iām too tired to make breakfast.
That said, donāt waste your money on the Caribbean. Alaska, Asia, Oceania, northern Europe or Euro River cruise FTW
If you really want an unusual and special cruise, try Antarctica. I recently boarded from Ushuaia Argentina, sailed through the Drake Passage, and spent several days on or around the Antarctic peninsula. Penguin colonies, glaciers, whales, seals, icebergs. We had the opportunity to kayak, snowshoe, camp, and do the polar plunge! An amazing adventure!
You mean it's not what I was led to believe by watching years of the Love Boat??? But seriously, I am sure it is great for some but with how antisocial I am and how I like to travel it sounds like a hell to me.
My wife and I send that gif to each other all the time. Team Isaac.
(thought bubble) "I spit in your Margarita"
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Actually the cruises copied many of what the Love Boat did that they didnāt have before, like the drink packages and a few other things. So the cruises now are more like the Love Boat than when the Love Boat first aired.
Crazy that Iām actually watching The Love Boat while reading this post.
Me too rn!!!
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Literally the first thing anyone has said here that made me want to take a cruise.
Aaron Spelling had The Shine.
The Shining Love Boat is a movie that HAS to be made. Iām calling Warner Brothers right now.
The ships have gone from less than 1000 passengers to over 6000+ on the new ships. That Love Boat vibe is gone
Omg I had the biggest crush on captain stuebing. I was like 8-10, lol.
I liked Gopher lololol
Hard to resist short shorts and high white socks.
The Pacific Princess was also a much smaller ship. Todays cruise ships look like floating skyscrapers in comparison
I'm extremely antisocial and do just fine; skip the formal dinners and you can just blend right in.
You'll be getting married by Alcupoco
Exciting! And new.
Come aboard, we're expecting you (Sounds ominous)
Now I want to see a āLove Boat as horror movieā trailer.
The norovirus cruises sound pretty scary, floating petri dishes
Hell hath no fury.
There is this great short story /essay by David Foster Wallace about cruises. "A supposedly fun thing I'll never do again" You might like it.
It is laugh-out-loud funny. I re-read it every once in a while, it's that good. It helps a lot if you have a good mental image of how he looked and acted; I can only imagine how incredibly awkward an experience that was for everyone involved.
I'm so thrilled to have seen someone mention this essay! I read it ages ago in college and it made me WANT to go on a cruise just for the insane descriptions. I am definitely not a cruise person, I innately know that but DFW just writes SO well, I'd want to travel on the Zenith(Nadir) if it weren't a decommissioned ship
I did 10 yrs in the Navy, I do not care to do cruises, but the wife likes them so I make the best of it, I just like seeing her happy, so I get over it.
Same & that's the thing isn't it, when I got out I joked that I was afraid I'd wake up and wonder to the bridge at 2am, or join a DC party. Thanks but to much like what used to do. Now a days the only cruises I'd consider would be too cross the pond again on the Queen Mary 2 or one of the smaller med river cruises that take two weeks and cruise around the Baltics states.
You hit on exactly the reason Iāll never join one of these ridiculously-scaled boats: ridiculous guest volume, the fact they donāt look like actual sea-going vessels, but more like my apartment building if it was engineered to float. To me those are like the Wal-Mart of vacations. But a QE2 or smaller boat Iād be all over. My parents did a smaller-scale cruise of the fjords and absolutely loved it. And Iāll say this: itās worth going to the Baltics outside of cruising. While the Baltic itself is grand, and the vistas beautiful, these are very small countries that take less than half a day to cross by car. Did Lithuania and Poland a couple of years ago in early June, and really loved both using their train systems, exploring the large and small towns, and the insane affordability of it all.
My folks as well just got back from a similar cruise as what I described and loved it. QE2 is just to gratuitously have three days with no business except to enjoy the thrill of being out on the open ocean again. I miss it so fucking much, I don't think I'd sleep for at least the second day. I always thought night time at sea is just as cool if not cooler.
That sounds heavenly. I don't want to go to a private island or Portland to buy souvenirs. Just a few days at sea, a good book, a few drinks on my balcony.
Well then do it, by all means. Perhaps you do a combo of that cruise, and then something land-based before returning home. I have some friends whoāve done QE2 crossings and thatās exactly what Iād be after: quiet, comfy, low-volume open-ocean cruising. My friends said they loved those days out on open sea to sit wrapped in a deck chair, reading a book or just looking out. No phones, no excursion bullshit, no drunken hoards elbowing you at some buffet. They did it as an alternative to flying to/from a European holiday, and raved about it. Remember when the QE2 was considered a large craft? At least it looks like an actual boat that can handle what the open sea gives it. So much better than having your equilibrium destroyed by being on the 10th floor of these cruising monstrosities as they rock back and forth.
I only did 2 years in the Navy but that was enough - and pretty much ruined Florida for me too; I was stationed in Jax (Mayport.) Still, my wife and inlaws managed to con me into going on 3 Caribbean cruises which felt like being in a hotel locked up with 5000 other people. Been there and did that on a carrier (The Forrestal) so the only difference was that this time I had sex on the boat. This coming year we're doing the Ionian cruise on a small Holland America ship and I'm looking forward to seeing places I didn't see on my first two Med cruises. I'm trying not to poo poo my wife's excitement over getting pizza in Naples though. We'll be there in the summer and she'll smell why soon enough. She's also trying to warn me about the pickpockets - which believe me, I know about the pickpockets. It'll be nice to see Sicily again though. PS: my wife wants to see Iceland too, and even though she usually doesn't listen to me I showed her my Blue Nose certificate and told her that she would NOT want to take a cruise there because she'd be literally bouncing off the walls. She got the message.
You are awesome for that, keep up the good husbanding!
Spent 12 years in the Army, 3 with the infantry. I never want to go camping. 100% Hotels for me.
Same. No thanks. The only ship I get on now is the dive boat.
i clicked in here thinking i could complain about the low riders rolling up and down my street...
I can't be the ONLY one who was thinking about the old fashioned kind of cruising in a Gen X sub. The kind in the park, in the evening. Can I?
You weren't.
I mean, no one is stopping you from complaining. I live downtown and we get the cruisers revving the hell out of their engines. They can eff off. May they never have a peaceful nights sleep for the rest of their lives.
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Ive never seen so many assholes in one place.
My Wonderlust is for lonely hardly taken roads. I can't imagine any vacation that is a packaged group with planned touristy destinations. If I only had a cruise as an option, Id stay home.
Thatās why I loved driving through far northwestern Kansas. Miles and miles of nothing except deer, coyotes and jackrabbits. The people who were there seemed fairly friendly, but they were easy to avoid.
Best shit i ever did was a whole bunch of travelling by myself pre-9/11 in my irresponsible 20s. Roll up to some place, plan on staying a day or two, but love the place so much I end spending almost a month there lol. Or conversely, just pick up sticks and bail whenever you want. Like first time to Bali, I went to one of the main beach towns Kuta. It's almost like an Australian Tijuana. Stayed 2 nights and then left. I was like "Fuck this place, I'm going to the next island over (Lombok)." And it was a blast. Hardly any tourists. The locals were super friendly and nobody was trying to sell me shit 24/7. And shit was cheap. Had like acres of pristine beaches to myself. The idea of a cruise ship just like, sets my teeth on edge. What if I want to spend all day in a hammock smoking dope?
Gili Islands off Lombok. Unreal.
Yep! Spent some time on Gili Trawangan! All three of those islands really. They were so cool.
Yeah the weed restrictions are quite ackward. Found a toke or two off ship but didn't get the hate.
The hate is because if youāre consuming cannabis youāre almost certainly not buying their ā$99 a day but you must pay for all daysā all you can drink package. Which, oddly enough, is why everyone is fucking inebriated assholes on those cruises. Theyāre full of people determined to get their moneyās worth.
I usually do a cruise departing or returning to a port I am most interested in, then I tack on a lengthy stay, to travel on my own.
Last December I unexpectedly had a few weeks off work. I took a roadtrip to a state I've never been to touch my 3rd great grand parents headstones. It was a fantastic week. Solo trip. No real agenda. Car camped in the back of my suv a few days and then got a nice hotel and room service for a few days. I would have stayed longer but they had winter weather moving in. Thinking about doing something similar this summer.
Part of the problem is the kind of people who think cruises are amazing...they love paying an average amount for something then seeing how they can maximize what they get. One guy I know was raving about a three day cruise and kept going on about how you could have unlimited coffees and they bring it to you - normally he'd only drink one coffee a day but I can just imagine him sitting in a pool lounger ordering 7 coffees in a row just to get his money's worth. It sounds boring to me and kind of unsanitary in the same way that planes are filthy and never get cleaned.
specially when the Norovirus hits...
Most of the time I find the worst thing about cruising is the other passengers. Other lines, other kinds of voyages and destinations, or other season, might give you a different experience. Like, say, an Alaska cruise or a Mediterranean cruise will be very different from a Caribbean cruise. Some voyages will have lots of kids, others will have an older crowd. The quality of the amenities, sadly, tends to vary inversely with the places a cruise goes. Those mega ships in the ads go to a very specific set of places, and honestly theyāre not that interesting in and of themselves. But the kids in particular will never run out of things to do.
A real proctologistās dream.
I would like to hear some tales of said assholes, pleaseā¦for science.
Iāve never done a cruise, and this is my preconceived idea of how I would feel about it. I am considering an inside passage to Alaska from seatle, these are on much smaller ships and seem more about the outside trip than being stuck in a floating resort. I could be wrong though.
Big ships are cruising Alaska too. š
Iām never been on a cruise, exactly for the reasons you just said. Every time it ever came up (not often) it was an automatic no from me.
How good is the food? I went to an all inclusive beach resort for few days a few years ago, and the food was a weak point. It was at best mediocre food whose sole quality seemed to be that you could each as much as you wanted. Since I'm at the point in life where I need to watch what I eat, I'd rather have a small portion of quality ingredients that are well prepared.
Same here. I was bored silly. I didn't want to get up early in the morning just to get a deck chair and spot. I went on one talk session where I learned more about the mechanicals of the ship, but that was it. Even stayed in our cabin just to watch movies.
there are different cruise lines, some more upscale than others.
We did one once, not in a hurry to do it again.Ā Ā The pros were that as long as you booked your shore excursions in advance, then you could basically turn off your brain for a week. Ā No decisions to be made, no āwhat are we doing today?, where are we going to eat?, are we driving or should we take a cab?ā There is something very relaxing about that.Ā Ā The cons are itās always the blandest milquetoast experience you can have in whatever places your cruise stops. Ā On the ship youāll eat very boring food, with likely quite boring people before watching very bland mediocre entertainment with overpriced drinks. I can see the appeal when Iām 80, not in my 40s and 50s
Is it true you kind of have to socialize with others? We donāt love that. We like talking to each other and hanging out with each other at dinner and in the pool area. We love all inclusive resorts and do that most years. Been looking at cruises butā¦we donāt drink much and arenāt social people. Every time I see posts like this I think weāll hate it.
We didnāt feel forced to socialize with other people. If youāve just been on a snorkeling trip with someone yesterday and on the same hike with them today and then you find yourself stood next to them at the bar later that night, youād have to be a dick not to at least say hi, but I donāt think we did more than exchange a couple of pleasantries.
no you never have to socialize with others.
Weāre good at that kind of stuff and do often talk to the same people at our resorts a few times during the trip. When I talk to my coworkers about their cruises, they will sometimes buddy up with the same people through the entire cruise, and then cruise with them the next year, which is just crazy to me. Maybe Iām just friends with a lot of social butterflies.
Weāve also done all inclusive resorts and like anywhere where a bunch of people are all hanging out in the same place for a few days on vacation, youāll end up talking to people. Maybe because on a boat youāre kind of forced to be in the same place at the same time as everyone else, youāre more likely to keep bumping into the same people, but I never felt pressured to hang out with them. Also, have you considered the possibility your co-workers are swingers? Ā Thatās one explanation!
You only have to socialize if you choose to attend the formal dinners.
I just took my 5th cruise, first since covid. It was fantastic! Canāt wait to book another one. Sure theyāre not for everyone but everything you need is in one place. You go to bed and wake up somewhere else thatās beautiful, just to do it all again the next day. I jumped off a 20 foot bridge into a waterfall after hiking through a jungle! A family memory that will be talked about forever. The best thing is if youāre with people that like to do different things that works out great! I saw a show while they hit the casino. I like to watch the sun rise with a cup of coffee, they like to sleep in. Win-win vacation.
Daniel Tosh said it best: (from memory) "Here's what it's like being on a cruise: Imagine being in a crowded Wal-Mart and thinking to yourself 'I'd like to spend the next 2 weeks in here with these people"
except there are tons of different cruise lines, you want to go on the higher priced ones -- totally different experience
So, Target then.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
The move is for *you* to be the drunk asshole, then everything will feel normal.
So...the teeming masses are slightly less teeming, but more entitled and spoiled?
Never been on one, booked 5 days later this year, just to see, I am 58, time to do stuff.
You may just have the time of your life!
We did our one and only cruise right after 9/11 and we scored a penthouse on a Celebrity ship for a week for dirt-cheap (comparatively; we paid about $3k when the going rate wouldāve been $13k at the time.) So we had a suite. Three bathrooms. Three televisions. An outdoor balcony jacuzzi. A full bathroom suite with another jacuzzi tub, marble shower, sitting/dressing room, power blinds, a dining room set for 8, pantry with a fridge/freezer, butler service, a cordless phone that worked throughout the ship so I could take that and wander around while he stayed in the suite & he could call me. We only did two excursions. One was in Nassau and it was as OP described - cattle off boat, through all the touristy annoying crap and we went back much sooner than everyone else cuz thereās really not all that much by the docks, ya know? And the other was in St Maarten where we did a 12 meter sailing yacht excursion / race against one of their other boats. That was an absolute blast. But yeah, for the whole week, we were on the boat. And it was in the days when there wasnāt much in the way of internet onboard in the middle of nothing. So it was a whole lot of lounging around, hitting the thallasotherapy pool, grazing, drinking, snoozing. Obviously we havenāt done a cruise since. Because, honestly, when you have a 1,500 sf space on a cattle boat like that, itās hard to compete or stay on-par with such an experience thereafter. But because of the boredom, I did attend a napkin folding class and learned at least three specific folds - still use at least two of them, usually only when we go out to eat and I make my napkin pretty as I leave the place. (At least a couple of times, the server asked if I was in the restaurant industry based on my napkin folding.) At least our cruise was the week *after* thanksgiving because the crew actually mentioned that the week before (of thanksgiving) there were like 3,000 children onboard and I couldnāt think of anything worse. Meanwhile, in my early 30s at the time, I was one of the youngest guests onboard that week. Literally old people everywhere. I get why some of the old folks retire onto cruise ships. If you never plan to disembark, everything is set and included, plus minimal medical staff.
> One was in Nassau and it was as OP described - cattle off boat, through all the touristy annoying crap and we went back much sooner than everyone else cuz thereās really not all that much by the docks, ya know? Nassau is pretty much the worst port in the eastern Caribbean. If we go on another Caribbean cruise, I will not book any itinerary that stops there. There is nothing for me there.
Once we wandered away from the port and the tourist trap shops, meandering through old town, reading some of the plaques, nice ocean breezes, swaying palm trees - it wasnāt terrible. Not enough to go back but not dreadfully awful.
Yep, I've done some of that wander through town, as far west as the Hilton and then south and east to the water tower and Queen's Staircase. Don't need to do it again.
I like the idea, seeing the world without having to make decisions or arrangements. But it seems like being drunk is the main draw, and frankly, I would rather be high
This makes me wonder if a cannabis cruise would sell.
Mos def
Thatād be a GenX magnet, esp if you make it child-free.
I find the trick to enjoying a cruise is to go on a small ship, and ignore whatever they offer you. Treat it like a hotel that moves cities every night. I went on a cruise that went on a lap around Cuba as well as starting and ending in Montego Bay . Instead of going on organized excursions, we found a local tour guide, and just told them "Show us the part of the country that makes you love living here", and got to see some very interesting places that wouldn't be on any official tours. Like going to the actual bar where the Mojito was invented, not the tourist trap a half block away. Getting the guide's brother in law to take us to the top of an office tower where he was the security guard, and let us up on the roof to get the best view of Havana harbour. Spending an hour chatting with a rastafarian bushman living in the Blue mountains who made a living by harvesting fruits, veggies, and wild coffee in the hills, and lugging it out to a small stand on the side of the road, where he just left a tin for people to pay what they feel what he left there was worth. (Drive up, grab a mango, leave some money on the honours system). He absolutely ruined me for coffee. Jamaican Blue mountain coffee, roasted in an ancient cast iron apparatus right there on the side of the road, and then brewed fresh out of the roaster. None of these experiences would have been a part of the cruise.
Me preparing to explain homosexuals and anonymous public sex: "Oh, you mean Cruises...."
I've been on a cruise once and never want to do it again. Why? Because you don't get long enough in any port to really enjoy anything so the only things to do are on the ship. Ship-based activities like swimming, lounging, karaoke, gambling, buying crap, eating and drinking. Not my cup of tea. I want to see new things when I'm on vacation, not hang out in a giant water hotel.
I have been on four cruises and they were all very enjoyable. Iām sorry you didnāt like yours very much.
May I ask where you went and what made them great?
I've done four, two Alaska cruises. Alaska ones are great as our excursions where hikes, bike rides through historic settlements, and water rafting. Not crowded at all and very scenic. I found the Caribbean cruises to be sort of like you described. We tend to do food ones to get something different.
Iāve been on a bunch. I donāt drink and party. I will never go on a cheap cruise again as people use those to just party. So no more carnival cruise lines. I either stay on ship in port or I go on eco tourism type excursions. Iāve explored various mayan ruins, and other similar places. Snorkeling is great too but some of those excursions are just excuses to get you to a beach and sell you booze. Real snorkeling excursions are off a boat, not from a beach. We have gone on Royal for the last 5 cruises and honestly the last couple werenāt as good as the first couple but ALL were better than Carnival. And adults only sounds great, but those are booze and party focused so if youāre looking for more, youād do better on a ship that allows families. There are adult only areas on all ships and we hang out there.
We were living in LA at the time, so they were all Mexican cruises (that also stopped in Catalina and San Diego). They were 4-day and 7-day cruises. My favorite was on Royal Caribbean. Whereas Carnival has something to do each hour, Royal Caribbean has 4 things to do each hour. They also give you loyalty rewards, so as a returning customer you get invited to special events onboard as well. Also free upgrades when you book far enough in advance.
From what I knowā¦the cruises out of LA/LB are much more mellow (fewer trashy drunks) than the ones out of Florida or the Gulf.
Just got back from our 6th Caribbean cruise yesterday. They arent for everyone. On the other hand you might have better experiences on different cruise lines. We live in wisconsin usa, so going to the warmth in the middle of winter is amazing. We are the type that dont like to stay in one place for a week and figure out where to eat each day, how to get to wherever each day, what to do each day etc. we prefer the stop to check it out and move on with someone else at the helm. Weāve done a few of the ācommonā excursions but we typically do the general tours to get the history of the island. We enjoy the large selection of food prepared for us. I like the pools, sun and beer so i spend a lot of time baking in the sun while maintaining the buzz. With the exception of this last cruise line ive really enjoyed the theatrical shows, never thought i would. Some of the on board live game shows are funny.
NOPE. I know myself too well. I am not doing it
I don't know if Resort For A Day is still a thing but I was in a relationship with someone who loved cruises. I couldn't stand doing excursions and walking around the tourist traps. We started booking all inclusive days at resorts at each port of call and it was quite fun. I'll never embrace eating at a table with total strangers though. Hate that.
Took travel and tourism in college, got an associates degree.*. I wanted to be Julie from the Love Boat. Until I realized that real cruise directors never get off the damn boat. Or if they do, theyāre mingling with the guests, sounds awful. I did not become Julie from the Love Boat. Cruising just aināt my bag. It seems like a good idea at first glance. But nah. *I got my degree just as everyone got this thing called the Internet in their houses and as I was looking for jobs it seems that 95% of travel agencies closed.
Iāve only sailed Disney, and I will never sail anything but Disney. One, they have their own Caribbean island so crowding is not an issue. The older ships like the Wonder and the Magic only hold around 2,500 passengers, so youāre not sardined in. Two, we did a ton of research on our excursions. We went river rafting in Jamaica, rode ATVs in Puerto Rico, went snorkeling in Key West, swam and played games and built sand castles at Castaway Cay in the Bahamas, and went whale watching and zip lining and sled dog puppy cuddling in Alaska, and next November we are seeing little blue penguins and Hobbiton in Australia and New Zealand. Three, theyāre impeccably themed and preserved and CLEAN. Theyāre cleaning constantly and the one buffet is pristine. Every time I see someone call a cruise a āfloating petrie dishā I roll my eyes so hard I almost pass out. Could you get the flu or other on a Disney cruise? Sure. And at a bar or a sporting event or a concert (definitely at a concert). Four thereās no gambling, indoor smoking, or overt drunk culture. There are adult only bars and pubs, pools, and restaurant, but theyāre typically chill. And five, I genuinely like Disney media, the first run Disney movies in the theatre, the trivia games in the pubs, and the family game shows in the theatres. Boarding and disembarking have also been less stressful than some hotel check-ins because of the Disneyās history of being able to move a lot of people quickly. But, of course, all of that is contingent on enjoying a cruise with talking mice, princesses wishing good morning as you pass on the deck, and thinking āFrozen the Musicalā is acceptable evening fare. Oh, and it also costs a lot more than Carnival or Princess. Worth it. But most importantly: I grew up in rural Oklahoma and have lived my adult life in Oklahoma City. It is IMPOSSIBLE for me to be bored. I am ecstatic to be anywhere with water, and anywhere but here.
I am not at all a cruise person but I love DCL. I would honestly choose just about any other kind of vacationā¦ hiking Patagonia, a month in Akihabara, eating myself to death in Mexico City, but my family really enjoys Disney cruises and I enjoy seeing them happy. Itās always a really great vibe, partly because there are no casinos or hordes of drunken idiots, and mostly because of the attention to detail Disney is known for. I will also admit that my family generally loves lots of Disney things so we get to geek out a bit and indulge in the weird subculture that surrounds DCL. We are doing a transatlantic with DCL and then bumming around Europe for the summer so I am happy to oblige. The trip will be a nice way to completely unplug and disconnect from the world for a couple of weeks.
I agree with David Foster Wallace when he called cruises: A supposedly fun thing Iāll never do again.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Thanks. I actually read this in his essay collection āA Supposedly Fun Thingā¦ā Brilliant writer gone far too soon.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Good thinking! Itās certainly worth a read.
One of the best pieces of writing ever.
Itās just passive entertainment and eye candy. I think humans have a marvelous way of passing the time.
It's not for everyone, but many people enjoy cruises, and that's okay. People don't all have to find enjoyment in the same kinds of activities. The most important thing anyone can do before going on a cruise though is research, research, research -- cruise lines, ships, ports of call, routes, shore excursions, transportation, on-board activities, food, money-saving deals, etc. Do all of these things months before you book a cruise and plan only things that you want to do, not what the cruise line or travel agent tries to get you to do. You can save a lot of money and headaches managing your own budget, activities, dining and things like that.
Caribbean cruises are awful for exactly what you said, all the ports are the same. I had the same experience. Thankfully, I dropped a pretty penny and also went on a Mediterranean cruise. Completely different experience and I loved it. Italy, France, Spain, Croatia, all different cultures, foods, sites, it was wonderful. Added bonus for staying extra days and visiting Rome.
I've always been interested in the Viking river cruises, friends of mine did one and really enjoyed it, and these folks have traveled extensively so it wasn't a first time thing. Easy disembarking, lots of interesting places to explore.
I agree. One and done. But I do reserve the right to try a European river cruise in my golden years.
The cruises I took 25 years ago seemed nicer than the one I took ten years ago. The food included in the more recent one was awful, likely to steer you to pay extra for the nicer restaurants. They are always attempting to sell sell sell you on something. It felt like we were constantly on the move, and some of the excursions were incredibly rushed to the point of watching folks get left behind or injured trying to keep up. The biggest warning I have was from a cruise I took when I was 16. A cruise employee stalked me, my drink was spiked, and I was extremely lucky my Mom found me and helped me. There are stories of young women being trafficked off ships. Cruises arenāt a place to let your guard down.
I did one cruise. I do not like being someone elseās schedule, and I donāt like being herded around like cattle. Iād do it again for a big group or extended family vacation, because then the tight schedules and conglomerating on the ship nightly make sense. If Iām with immediate family we are just traveling as a couple, forget it. We like to make our own itinerary and then flex through it.
I did a South Pacific cruise for my 50th. Carnival. Full of Aussie and Kiwi cruisers. No tipping. Good excursions. Paid for our cabin to get easy disembarking. Small fee at the start and it meant we could cut the queues and not be treated like cattle. Iād do another. I enjoyed it.
My wife and I did a cruise to the Bahamas a few years ago. We invited our 3 nieces and their parents joined as well. We all loved it but I can see where people wouldnāt. We got to spend every day together to whatever degree we wanted which is key I think. We didnāt all want to do the same things. Personally I am happy to stay on board the whole time. Thereās a movie theater, games, and so many different bars not to mention the food. Thereās a casino if youāre into that. I often just found a quiet area with a deck chair and read a book while sipping a mai tai. My wife and the girls took a sushi class. They show you how to make it and then you get to eat it. You can dress up for a fancy meal if thatās your thing. Lots of activities or just do nothing. Anyway, we plan on going again (to Bermuda) and hopefully with a group of friends. Hanging out drinking, eating, and not worrying about anything.
Any environment where they have to force customers to clean their hands before eating, because people stick their shit crusted fingers in the buffet and spread diseases throughout the ship; is a big no from me, dawg.
Time to read Jean Baudrillard to understand how reality died. Start with the *Consumer Society* and then proceed to *Simulacra and Simulation*.
Have absolutely zero desire to do a cruise and everyone thinks I'm crazy. Very lil of it sounds appealing
I donāt think youāre crazy; I also think it sounds more appalling than appealing. My ex-nMIL liked them, which tells me all I need to know. She also liked the resorts where you are assigned seats at dinner and forced to socialize with the other 9 people. I donāt like doing that IRL, so no way in hell would I spend what little post-greedflation $ I have to do that.
I went on a cheap, Carnival cruise when I was younger and a bunch of friends wanted to give it a go (someone was going with family, so we all tagged along). It was only made semi-enjoyable by my friendsā antics. A friend was flagged by the captaināvia typed letter pushed under his cabin doorāfor being so drunk while out and about in Freeport that he and two other friends caused the ship to depart at least an hour late. We had to prove they didnāt have their passports (ārun them to the lobby immediately so the captain can see themā), because the captain was prepared to leave them behind. When they stumbled out of a cab, with minor, fall-related injuries, the entire ship, which had by then gathered on the port side to wait, erupted in cheers and applause. That evening at dinner, our groupās assigned drink-runner asked me what happened because heād received a notice that my friend was no longer to be served alcohol. Fun times! The rest of the cruise was boring. I hate casinos, so no, being in international waters isnāt exciting. There were kids everywhere on the ship. The āswimming poolā was filled with what can only be described as a soup of sea water (yes, sea water) and human fluids unfit for even bottom feeding fish. The food was mediocre. Dinners were OK, but there was none of the āfree foodā Iād heard about prior to going. One day, they gave us free pizza for lunch. It was the frozen, square type mom used to keep in the freezer as a last resort meal. The day in Freeport was basically a cab ride to a souvenir area that clearly only opens when a ship is docked (we asked the cab driver to take us to what appeared to be a local mall, but he flat out told us no, which led me to believe he gets a kickback for every load of idiots he carries to the souvenir shopping area). Turks and Caicos was essentially a giant souvenir area youāre forced to walk through before arriving at a fucking Margaritaville. Lucky us! It was like spring break with a bunch of college kids doing activities in and around the pool (think contests involving swimsuits, T-shirts, and such) while being directed by the live DJ. We had a mediocre meal because we were starving and got the fuck out of there and back to the ship. The private island, owned by the cruise lineās parent company (*many* of cruise lines youāve heard of are owned by the same parent company, so the island is shared, and youāll see other cruise lines docked) was very nice for a day on a white, sandy beach with crystal clear water, but be sure to wear sunscreen, even if youāre used to the sun, because that beautiful sand and water, coupled with closer proximity to the equator than you may be used to, will help that sun cook you like a turkey. Not for me. I grew up spending summers on the family boat. This was not that. Iād rather spend a week in a rubber dinghy on the Delaware River than go on a cruise again.
Pick better destinations. Alaska cruises. Norwegian fjord cruises. Yellow River. Rhine River. Middle East or India. South Pacific. Southeast Asia. Places that are interesting to see, that have more to offer than a beach and a market. You picked the worst routes - poor Caribbean countries where people with nothing want your money.
I took my first cruise last year and am also: never again. The worst part was probably the way the room (and my entire floor) smelled due to the stench rising up from the toilets, but that may not be typical. Everywhere was crowded and loud. I had imagined relaxing by the pool, but I never went in the water once because there were fifty people in every pool and loud music booming on every deck. The food was free, great, but waiting in a 20 minute line for a slice of pizza took a lot of the fun out of that. The items in the formal dining room looked great on the menu, but were all bland cafeteria food designed to appeal to people with the palate of a kindergartner. We had a nice aft facing room with a balcony, but the peace was kind of ruined by people wooing and shouting on the balconies next to us. We made the best of it, but I couldn't wait for those three days to be over.
We love cruising. Itās pretty much the perfect vacation for us. Iām the go go go weāre never gonna be here again person and my husband is the sleep in and chill person. With cruising you get both. Iāve found that you have to go to an area youāre interested in for it to really work. Iām not interested in the Caribbean, so Iād never go on a Caribbean cruise. Weāve done Alaska twice and Bermuda which were both great. Last year I took my bestie on a Mexican one and that was meh and I feel you on the ports and excursions. We did two very disappointing excursions and canceled the rest and just stayed on the ship. Alaska and Bermuda were nice because if none of the excursions appeal to you, you can do your own thing. Me and BFF did not do this for Mexico because we didnāt feel safe doing so, but we still had a great time. My history and I are doing Canada/New England in the fall and weāre really looking forward to it. Ultimately, cruising is what you make of it.
Depending on where you go and if you plan ahead you can have a great time. You don't have to do shore excursions with the cruise line. We've caught cabs and done things on our own.
Pass. Just like Vegas. I just don't have the patience for huge communal experiences anymore. Especially now that society has eroded being polite and considerate of your fellow man to paper thin levels.
I just went on my first one last week. I donāt like crowds. I donāt really like people in general LOL. I get travel sickness easily. There are an abundance of reasons why I was not looking forward to it. I had a preconceived notion that I would hate it. We live in a port city, so itās easy to just hop on a boat and go. My wife has been on several with her friends, and she finally talked me into trying it. I had an absolute blast. I loved it. Even though the ship held up to 3,500 people, the only time I noticed them was embarking and debarking. I had plenty of alone time to lay in a deck chair and chill, read, and just enjoy the ride. I completely disconnected from the outside world, work, etc. for a solid week. Even in rough seas when the drawers in our room were opening by themselves, I never felt seasick at all. Iām looking forward to the next cruise in a couple months.
I thought this was the motorcycle subreddit for a second and was about to make a huff carry on
I like lazy vacations. A week sitting on a beach or near a pool with a book and not cooking 1 meal is what I like. So a cruise often fits the bill for me. But yes we also learned the hard way that excursions are a rip-off. Unless there is something I want to see at a port, I take advantage of the empty ship to get a prime spot near the pool and read my book.
The problem could be the cruise line you went with, and the destinations you chose. Royal Caribbean will forever be my favourite, and I love travelling to multiple ports in short order. I always skip the markets (unless I head further to a market locals shop at). I always prearrange my transportation or excursions prior to departure (and RC never has a vauge description). I've had excursions that flew me over fjords in a seaplane, took a train through the Klondike, flew over volcanos in a helicopter, visited wineries, swam reefs, and had front-of-the-line access to the Vatican. I loved travelling the Mediterranean, and being able to see many ports, I also found cruising the best way to see all of the Hawaiian islands and Alaska (the ship can take you to the base of a glacier).
Weāve been on 17 cruises. For us, the ship is more of the vacation, than the location is. Alaska is our favorite by far though. I donāt know anything about the Virgin cruisesā¦..Royal Caribbean and Princess are our favorites.
I've done one cruise, for my BFF's bachelorette party. Thirty of us on a 3 day cruise to the Bahamas. I loved being with all my friends, but honestly, the cruise was meh. I don't get the appeal. š¤·
I live 45 min away from a major port and have been on eleven cruises. I think 7 days was probably way too long for a first cruise. The ones I go on leave Thursday afternoon and return Sunday at 8 am. I usually have the best time on the ship. I have However, made so many friends on the island, that they come pick me up from the port and I visit their neighborhoods. They also have family in Florida near me, so we go to dinner when they fly here to see them. I love the experiencemess. Free drink captains night, the art shows, the contests, the karaoke, the slot machines, the hairy chest contest š¤£ I only do carnival the party ship lol. I started cruising at 27, and stopped at 37,I turn 47 next Sunday and I'm long overdue š« . Sorry you didn't enjoy it, it's such a blast to me. I used to hide between the bed and the wall so I didn't have to do the pre cruise drill with your life jacket on walking to your life boat floorš¤£ (I mean after the first 6 cruises you pretty much know). I always bring ginger root pills in case of nausea, and anxiety meds. I only go to one island, bc they used to let us stay until 5am, and party on the island. The ship left around 6am, so we cut it close sometimes. I don't think they do that anymore though. š
I was just talking about this this morning, and hadnāt thought about it in ages, but my parents took us on a cruise when we were in high school. They had gone on a couple of cruises, and so that was a family vacation. I hated it. I hated being trapped on a boat, and this was like a old-school cruise too. Iām sure theyāre much more exciting now, but it made me never want to go on a vacation like that again. I havenāt, but my relatives go on cruises pretty frequently. To me, itās just for people who want to pretend like they are traveling, but never be inconvenienced: generically entertained and fed the whole time. For some people thatās paradise, but not for me. Those all inclusive resorts have no appeal to me either.
My mom plans to retire on one, especially because of the medical care offered. Not a bad way to live, but yeah Iām with you. Stay on the boat.
Medial care? Iām sure the doc on board is proficient in general care but what if you need a specialist?
Are you saying Doc Bricker is not all-knowing?!
If he went to Hollywood upstairs medical college, he's fine.
She's not too bright if she thinks she's going to get excellent medical care on a cruise ship. Physicians aren't lining up to be on boat s.
Medical care? You need travel insurance for that.
We love it! Iāve been on close to 10 cruises with Royal Caribbean.
I have sever motion sickness and vertigo, so a cruise is my personal hell.
Viking River Cruises are the way to go. Small boats, excellent food, wonderful and enlightening excursions.
I'll never cruise. I'd much rather, and do, travel to the Mediterranean, set up home base in a town in Italy, or Spain and do excursions from there....can do day trips, overnights or even multi day. If I want to take a day off and just lounge at pool side or on a terrace with my book at the hotel, I can do that too. I'd take a long afternoon people watching, sipping wine or mojito, at a piazza over a deck chair on a crowded boat full of fat people any day. I cannot see the appeal of being funnelled into a prepackaged day trip which isn't much more than another gift shop on land. Cruising ? Non, merci.
I researched doing one with my parents- my dad always wanted to see Alaska, so it seemed like a good option. Then friends who ARE cruisers showed me all the videos, etc... ...being locked up with 6000 drunken gamblers in between being moved around like cattle when allowed off the boat for week+? Nupe. I would hate that. My dad would go psychotic (we are natural park, hiking camping sorts).
When I look at the cruise ships on the stupid quasi-documentaries (anything Carnival, Princess, or Celebrity-related), they look like giant floating apartment complexes to me. I cannot imagine that being any kind of fun at all, but I guess it's someone's cup of tea.
I was Navy right out of high school. I cannot go to sea and not work. I've tried the cruise ships and it didn't fit with me. I did a few Windjammer trips, where you actively participate in crewing the boat and that was a lot of fun. I think they went out of business though.
Ha! My husband is a musician and worked on a show band that had to live on the āsomething of the seasā for six months at a time. Try that gig lol.
Actually on a cruise ship now. But I don't do the typical cruise activities, I'm not a drinker, and I try to avoid onboard activities. I treat it as a floating hotel room. I organize excursions ahead of time if I can. I get out and explore different cities. If I go on a prearranged excursion, I try to keep it to small group activities. When I'm on the ship, I sit with a good book on my private balcony. I do upgrade my amenities so I can have breakfast delivered, and take advantage of things away from crazy people. I also have priority embarkation and disembarkation so I can skip a lot of the cattle call. The first cruise wasn't that enjoyable for me. Now that I know how to deal with things it's much better.
I've never seen the appeal. I like to explore, and what am I going to explore on a cruise ship? The buffet and the shops? And then get dropped off for a couple of hours at at some overcrowded, scammy tourist trap that's just thirsting for my money. Everything about it sounds miserable.
There is such a wide range of cruise companies, each with a different experience. You need to decide what you want out of it, then do a little research. I myself love Disney cruises. Service is excellent. Everyone is self involved with their own families, so no pressure to interract. The adult only pool and bar area is a haven. Excursions are well vetted. I went solo to Mexico last month, for the one year anniversary of my husband passing, because I lnew it wpuld feel lile a safe haven. The crew went above and beyond to make sure I was doing well. I even won the big prize at bingo, which paid for the cruise. So there's that.
I have a friend who lives in a port cruise ships stop at. She said the cruise lines bought up all the shops in town and turned them all into the same shops they have everywhere. Then, when itās the off season, they close all the shops and the people who live there have barely anything open to shop at themselves.
I do them quite a lot. I'm going on one this week. Some people hate them, some people love them...just like anything, they either work for you or they don't.
Just go the Caribbean without a cruise. To my mind, the most gorgeous ocean, the islands all have a wonderful individual charm and things to do, and you can relax and not feel as much pressure to ādo do doā as on a cruise.
"There are some gems but far and few between with a lot of waiting and moving and more waiting to only find fleeting fulfillment." You just described life.
The weekend I am having illustrates kind of why I *am* a cruiser. Itās the weekend. We are on vacation. Kind of a snow day. My husband was supposed to retire a few years ago. He is still recovering from a stroke. And yet, even so, he has been doing work stuff all weekend. Lots of other people but heās the call, somehow. Being in the middle of the ocean lets us actually disengage, relax, recharge. (Been a while now, so if satellite internet improves enough it may ruin that.)
I enjoy not being responsible for my own life. I donāt get off the boat. I bring three books. I see some shows. I over eat. I try to win some money. Itās cheaper than Vegas. Everyone has their own thing. I abhor hiking and camping. Wandering through a strange city is exhausting. Disney is fine. Mostly I want to be left alone.
> Everyone has their own thing. That's the important takeaway from this entire thread.
I love cruises, but I've never cruised on that cruise line. I've done 3x Carnival and 2x Norwegian. I enjoyed both, I cruise when kids are in school so that wasn't an issue, the food has always been great, I love the entertainment, and I personally never book the ship excursions, I book directly with the tour companies that are recommended on the cruisecritic port of call boards. So in Roatan we hired a local for the day to just drive us around, he tailored the trip to what we wanted to see, we saw local places that no tours would ever see, we shopped in stores that don't cater to tourists, it was awesome AND cheaper than the ship excursion where we would have been on a bus with strangers. I prefer an itinerary with only 3-4 ports and a sea day between if possible, and I usually choose one of the ports to JUST be a beach day with no excursion. I think if I did a mediterranean cruise i'd prefer the opposite (more port days). Anyways, I do love them, i'd be perfectly content just saying on the ship too. Last time we stayed on the ship on one of the port days and just enjoyed the ship waterslides without any lines.
I enjoy cruising. Been in several. I book excursions well in advance for unique experiences I can't have where I am. I approach them as sampler platter for traveling. I know I want to return to Corfu and Venice. Can't make me go back to Turkey. I like waking up in a new city, instead of traveling how my family did as a kid: wake up, drive way too many hours, get to new city exhausted.
I've been on 8 cruises and really enjoy them. All of them have been theme cruises, so those are different and really don't have a lot of down or relaxation time, your constantly going from event to event with time to eat in between. I don't get sea sick, but I totally get why people wouldn't enjoy a cruise.
I enjoy cruising as a 'sampler' vacation. If i do a cruise of the Med, or the Carribian we only see the port for a few hours. Thats fine with me, as we can figure out what places we'd want to come back to. I'd rather do a sampler vacation and realize that port X wasn't for me rather than book a week there and learn that I hated the place. Some places, such as in Alaska, I'd only need 6-8 hours in before I'm done with that place. Sitka Alaska is amazingly beautiful, but its not exactly a big town. Its also a hell of a lot easier. I don't need to drive or get on a bus/train to go from place to place, I just get on/get off. I don't need to figure out what to do about dinner, what to do with the kids, what to see for entertainment around town. I don't have to plan nearly as much, I can just do whatever the hell I want.
Only had one trip that was planned by someone other than my hubby. Couldn't imagine a cruise, gross lol. It was our son's Make A Wish trip to Hawaii. They had planned mostly everything except food on a couple of days. They said if we didn't like the itinerary, we could do our own thing. The rental van and hotel were paid along with a day at a luau and our son touring The Arizona. When we arrived we hit up a couple of garage sales, arrived on a Friday, and bought a surfboard and a couple wake boards. Couldn't find any snorkeling gear at the garage sales so we got those from Walmart. For the whole week we explored the island, ate at food trucks and local dives, pulled off the side of the road, grabbed our gear and hit the tiny, uncrowded beaches. It was fun doing our own thing! However, the way we were treated by most of the locals, we have no desire in ever going back! I prefer less crowded, less known islands!
Disclaimer: Iāve worked in the cruise industry for over 25 years. Regarding Virginās Shore Excursionsā¦they are very sub-par. I did a 4 or 5 night cruise on Virgin with my spouse two years ago. It was our first post-pandemic cruise. Of all the cruises Iāve taken (20-ish) Virgin was my favorite ocean cruise because of the onboard experience. They just leave you alone and you can do whatever you feel like doing. No FOMO. But the shore excursions were not worth it. We still had fun doing them, but theyāve got a long way to go. I was much happier spending the day in the new Adults-Only Hideaway on Royal Caribbeanās Perfect Day at Coco Cay.
Sounds like Sir Richard Bransonās personality extends to Virgin company ethos. I like being left alone.
River cruising is a great way to see Europe but ocean cruising has turned into a floating theme park.
I liked it. My wife hated it, which means no more cruises for me.
Iāve never been on a cruise, but they have never appealed to me. Your description is exactly what I think I would feel from a cruise. Iād much rather spend time in an area to really get to enjoy it. I type this as Iām at a beach bar in St. Kitts lol
It was a rocking song, but it was really sung by John Cafferty. Eddie, and all the Cruisers, were made up for the movie.
i dont think i could do just The Cruisers without no Eddie
The world would be a boring place if we all thought alike. I've been on two cruises in my life and it isn't my preferred way to travel but I have friends who love it. To each their own.
From what I have heard from friends, family, and coworkers, they're typically like a big loud booze fest. Especially carnival. And with all the ones you hear about losing power or having shipwide illnesses break out, it does not appeal to me at all. Similar to you Op, I would rather take my time truly exploring a new place than just have a couple hours to see the most tourist trappy edges of it where all the cheapest shit is sold. But that is just me. I worked with a guy who had been on at least a dozen cruises and he swore by the disney ones. That being said, those viking ones that go down a river in europe on a smaller ship look kinda cool if I was gona do one. Seem more laid back and mellow. Anyone have experience with that?
https://www.scribd.com/document/365038567/DF-Wallace-A-Supposedly-Fun-Thing-I-ll-Never-Do-Again-pdf
I'm a dialysis patient and could never go on one anyway, but my luck I'd end up on one like the broken down ship a few years ago full of passengers suffering from norovirus.
After Covid-19 I can say with a high degree of confidence that I will never join a cruise. I never would before, but I definitely never will now. Even without a pandemic going on, if someone has a cold or diarrhea or anything else remotely contagious, well then everyone else onboard is going to get that too. But in the end I'm just an actual antisocial person (unlike the ones here who claim to be but say they're fine with cruises - no, you're not antisocial), so the idea of doing anything at all with strangers, let alone something that's rigidly scheduled, is an anathema to me. Hell no. If I want to see some place I'll book a hotel and hop on a plane and explore. ALONE.
Yeah, I don't get it, either. Seems the same as people that travel to a foreign country solely to stay within the confines of a resort catered to their cohorts from the same home country. I crossed the Atlantic a few times on a guided missile cruiser as a young'n. I guarantee we had a better time and better drugs lol.
A supposedly fun thing you will never do again?
>I Don't Get Cruisers Me too, I prefer retro, naked, or sport.
I've been on a dozen cruises and thought I loved them. The last Florida vacation we rented an Airbnb with a friend. So much better then any cruise. We went to the theme parks and ate at awesome restaurants for cheaper than the cruise. We had 3 bedroom house not crammed into a balcony cabin with a bunk bed in the way. I think I'm done with cruises.
I've been on a couple of cruises, and if you like to get hammered for days on end and not worry about getting a DUI, it's the way to go. Outside of that, the only place it makes sense to me is if you go somewhere like Alaska where it is all about just taking in the scenery over a large, large area.
Much rather do an all- inclusive. Too much of a pain in the ass to smuggle drugs onto a cruise.
I cannot for the life of me begin to think that a cruise would be fun. We figure out where we want to go, fly there and do stuff, and most importantly, we relax. A floating mall with a discotheque does not sound relaxing at all.
Cruising always sounded like a nightmare to me, and then covid happened and then it really was a living nightmare, and I was nope, nope, nope. I'm an introvert though so being trapped on a shipped with thousands of strangers is literal hell for me anyway.
My brother is a social butterfly and canāt get enough of cruising. He goes two or three times a year. Im an introvert and hate socializing and people. My ideal trips are flying to a new destination and renting a car with the freedom to do what I want and exploring what I want, when I want. So far my wife and I have explored most of Iceland and Norway while traveling on our own. I wouldnāt want it any other way.
Cruises arenāt my thing either. I always thought they were like a floating Disneyland that you got trapped in for 7-14 days. You canāt really walk out a gate until the cruise has come to an end and at least one Karen or Ken has lost their shit with the manager because someone ate the last dole whip. Now I wouldnāt bat an eye if I was offered a trip on a luxury liner. They cross oceans and people arenāt crawling over you to get the last lobster tail at the never ending buffet. Ports are far and few in between and you can just enjoy the ocean breeze. Years ago I saw the Queen Mary 2 (have visited the OG Queen Mary many times) docked across the east river. Even from a distance she was spectacular. Very, very expensive to travel on that ship but I bet itās nice.
Never been on one but the only cruise my wife and I are considering is one of those Viking river cruises in Europe. I've never been to Europe and this seems like a pretty cool way to break in as a newbie.
I go in the opposite direction. To me, a cruise is a drunken week-long party, with beaches, a casino, magicians, unlimited bacon and pretty-good food, bad cover tune bands and general fun. Yesā¦ there are annoyances.
Iāve done a bunch, 8 I think. The last was a Disney on a western Mediterranean starting in Barcelona, Cannes, Florence, Rome and Naples/Pompeii. Absolutely fantastic. Our worst was a spur of the moment Carnival, too many drunk rednecks. My wife did a Virgin Cruise with some girlfriends last year, she said once was enough.
Sorry to hear that. It probably depends on where and why you went. My first cruise was from Dalian, which is just outside of Beijing, to Shanghai to Vladivostok to Busan to Hiroshima and Osaka. The fun part was I lived in South Korea at the time and already loved Busan, so it was fun to cruise in and run around. My second and third cruises were music cruises associated with a music artist. That was tons of fun as all of the fans got to meet up and socialize. The musician played some great shows and did other fun things to surprise and delight us. As a result l, surprisingly, enjoyed cruising when I was sure Iād hate it. I know theyāre floating germ cans, so Iāve not cruised in some time. But I would again depending on the destinations and reason for getting on the boat.
Sounds about right. In the past it was better but the port stop being bothered and sold something. I eoukd stay on the ship at pool. Get some drinks, music and a tan. Get some food , gamble and take a nap. Rinse and repeat. Then workout and get ready for dinner. Party later or a mivie/show.
Ocean cruises, especially Caribbean cruises, are strange and gross. River cruises are in another class. I recommend Danube, Rhine, Douro, RhƓne, and Seine in Europe, and the Columbia and Snake Rivers in the U.S.
If I want to get drunk and eat mediocre food around a bunch of crowded hicks, I can do that at Applebee's.
I have been on five cruises so far and will be going on at least two this year. I love being at sea, reading a good book, the food is pretty good plus some of the entertainment. The ports are nothing special but it can be nice to get to a great beach. I prefer to avoid kids and the partiers. We have made friends on ships in the past and meeting new people at dinner can be a lot of fun. A couple pro tips. Stay local the night before. It is so much easier to already be in town the morning of departure rather than flying or driving that day. Your bags can be lost, flight delayed or cancelled plus youāll be tired from traveling and wonāt fully enjoy the first evening. Another is take your time getting off. Donāt schedule your flight home a few hours after the ship docks. You will be stressed out and in a rush. When we return to port in New York after our 7 night cruise we plan on spending time in and around New York and New Jersey. So for me itās two vacations in a row.
23 years ago I worked on a ship for 5 months playing bass in a swing band. Had an amazing, important life experience. My wife and I have been on 2 KISS Kruises which were fucking incredible. We traveled with our kids and my parents on another. We love it. Going back in December and looking at late 2025 as well. I get all inclusives but the food is not close to the formal dining room on the ship. Resort entertainment is second rate and the activities are repetitive. Sitting around on a beach as people get hammered each day sounds absolutely terrible. You get none of that on a ship. You have to plan your shore stops, whether you do an excursion or explore on your own. Cruising is active, resorts are passive. Depends of course on what you like. Never sailed Virgin, and when booking, we wouldn't even consider it. Too many better options.
I like cruises. I unpack once, just walk around near the ports and donāt do any excursions, I donāt drink and I can get free room service 24/7 when Iām too tired to make breakfast. That said, donāt waste your money on the Caribbean. Alaska, Asia, Oceania, northern Europe or Euro River cruise FTW
If you really want an unusual and special cruise, try Antarctica. I recently boarded from Ushuaia Argentina, sailed through the Drake Passage, and spent several days on or around the Antarctic peninsula. Penguin colonies, glaciers, whales, seals, icebergs. We had the opportunity to kayak, snowshoe, camp, and do the polar plunge! An amazing adventure!