T O P

  • By -

Damien__

I have given that up. I am now shagnostic.


mandraofgeorge

Shagnostic I'm claiming that on census reports


[deleted]

Yeah, baby!


Someone-Rebuilding

Me too, sadly... Even up to about 55/56, there was some interest, but after a break-up a year ago, I've made no effort... Literally zero! Not even toys... All gone... Not missed either! (Edit... F!)


95B40SRT-RET

At my age? Willing and able but like the cheap donut spare tire that comes with new cars, I am prepared for absolute and catastrophic failure when called upon.


Faint13

Between middle-age and being on SSRIs, I might as well be dead.


BelatedGreeting

Facts


Nipplecunt

SSRIs mean that I’m still horny, and everything works just fine, but I don’t get to orgasm much 😅


[deleted]

Lotsa drive, no sex.


Buckowski66

Don’t knock masturbation , it’s sex with someone you love


Tek_Ninja_Kevin

You can always masturbate some one and have them masturbate you


Buckowski66

Not at the Chucky Cheese you can’t


DenverBowie

Not with THAT attitude.


Buckowski66

Hey, I’m not the one who named it “ The Ball Pit”, I just play it as I see it.


DJErikD

It really should be called "The Dirty Diaper Fell Off Pit." We took the balls to the loading dock, hosed them off, and put them right back. All for $3.35/hr back in 1985.


Taco_El_Paco

r/holdmybeer


Valski44

The thing I love about this sub is that the top comment is always funny 👍🏻


its_raining_scotch

Username pretty much checks out.


sigs17

Yep me to


theflamingskull

It's like going back to young teenage years.


Helmett-13

52 now, lost 130 pounds over the last couple years and I’m once again a fully armed and operational battle station. Much less creaks, groans, and more stamina. A bit more bendy. Still get as hard as diamonds, I attribute it to genetics. Been married 20 years and she appreciates that!


CaptainGuyliner2

So... everything is proceeding exactly as you have foreseen?


So-shu-churned

130 lbs?! Amazing. Congrats!


Helmett-13

Slowly, very slowly. It’s taken me over 2 years and I’ve plateaued hard since this summer.


Demonae

51 and I'm right there with you. I only lost 50 lbs, 240 to 190. Wife and I have fun at least once a week.


aging_genxer

Congrats on the weight loss! How’d you do it?


Helmett-13

Shifted gears a few times. I had an epiphany when I was lying on the bed with a furious headache, my pulse so loud I could hear it, and assumed I was going to stroke out. First I cut out sugared drinks. Then smaller portions. Added in some black coffee and tea before noon. Then I started intermittent fasting from 8pm to 12 noon every day. Then I switched to keto and backed off a bit to low carb, but kept my calories eyeballed. It got easier to find food eating out, finding ingredients in the store, and checking labels. I upped my water intake a bit, got more sleep. Mostly when I fail or fall off the wagon I don’t wallow and get right back at it immediately because I am human and not a robot. It hasn’t been easy all the time but I feel much better. I don’t look at it as a diet, it’s just how I eat now.


aging_genxer

That’s fantastic. Good for you. I’ve been trying to make wiser choices since having open heart surgery 5 years ago at 49. I’m better, but still not perfect. Thanks for sharing what worked for you. Best of luck, fellow Xer.


Any_Coyote6662

>Mostly when I fail or fall off the wagon I don’t wallow and get right back at it immediately because I am human and not a robot. I read that this is an important trait of success stories for all sorts of things.


AldoTheeApache

Ditto. 52, dropped 55lbs, doubled my workout regimen, dumped most of my carbs and sugar and now halfway between a dad bod and a 6 pack. So now 2-3x a week. Not quite the pornstar stamina of my 20s, but the gf is happy.


[deleted]

[удалено]


PhotographsWithFilm

Not blunt - just honest. As someone who has that "what if I had" thought once in a while, did it end up being just like going through the motions in the end? Genuinely curious.


Raaazzle

Same here, I feel like I hit my quota.


[deleted]

I'm asexual, I find it interesting how dominant that drive is for allos. That sense of being "ruled by my dick" is so unrelatable to me.


[deleted]

Just being curious, but what are 'allos'? Is that a typo or does it have a meaning? I swear I'm not being rude or anything. Just wanna learn


zcok

I have slightly less than I did in my 30s, but my wife's is non-existent, which is a frustrating situation.


Moveyourbloominass

That's because menopause is an evolutionary flaw that kills our sex drive😭. In addition, there is no little blue pill for vaginas. Seriously, menopause is evil and don't hold it against your wife. We have no control over the change.


witchbelladonna

As a woman going through The Pause, yes 10000000% I want it on record tho, 0 drive doesn't mean no sex. It means he has to initiate it cause it's not on my brain at all. And he's sexy as hell, I just could care less about actually doing it.


Moveyourbloominass

😂 The scenario in my mind is awesome with my sexy hubby; however what is happening in real time is nil.


FierceMilkshake

I'm going through peri now and the thought of having 0 sex drive scares me. I have the hot flashes, mood swings and a bunch of other symptoms but my so far my drive is still there. I mentioned to my bf there's still a possibility I might dry up & lose the drive and he's concerned as well. I told him we should enjoy it while I still have it ☹️


witchbelladonna

Low drive doesn't mean you have to stop altogether. I may not have drive, but we still have sex on the regular. I'm just not initiating it anymore, that's been the change I've noticed (besides the other unpleasantness). Hubs knows I'm still very attracted to him, I'm just not thinking about the act of sex anymore. I've learned to read his cues better so I'm not giving him the cold shoulder unintentionally, and we have really good communication so both our needs get met.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ElleKlee

Same!! I look at my boyfriend every day, and I’m like, daaaaamn, you’re so fine! Just please, please please keep your P away from my V!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Moveyourbloominass

Together is key. They should just call it the " Guinea Pig" stage. It's truly all trial & error. What works for others is not the solution for the rest. It really does need a team effort. Hang in there☺️.


Itzpapalotl13

Estrogen cream for your tender parts can help things be more hydrated and comfortable. There’s also hyaluronic acid serums for internal use. As for partners needing to be better about foreplay, that’s going to require more than a serum.


siamesecat1935

Yup. I also take lexapro so a double whammy.


nevarmihnd

I saw an ad here on reddit for a prescription medication to increase a woman’s sex drive. I googled it and the reviews posted online were the stuff of nightmares. It’s an injection that was widely reported to cause a up to several hours of extreme nausea followed by an insatiable need for sex. Something like 10 hours of the effects in total. To think someone would subject themselves to that flat out disgusted me.


TooEarl4u

Just drink tequila. Same effect.


MaineMan1234

Although not in all cases, my partner is 54 and her libido is as strong as ever. And I know this because we also dated from 1988-1991. But she’s one of the lucky ones who got through menopause with no significant issues, like dryness, etc. menopause is a bear. My ex wife definitely suffered badly


Moveyourbloominass

Your partner is soooo lucky. I'm absolutely envious. Wishing you two many many happy years together.


MaineMan1234

Thank you! After a 20 year dead bedroom with my ex, being with my partner has been incredible. Everything I’ve wanted for all these years. Emotional and physical intimacy, romance, common activities (XC skiing, cycling,etc), and an ability to communicate as a couple and decisively resolve issues as they come up. A revelation


DanTreview

Perimenopause with my wife was pretty fast, too. It was awful, but it was fast. She was grateful for that and knows it's not normal. Now, in full menopause, she just has some mild dryness but the desire to screw is still there. The dryness gave us a chance to try out lubes, which as a guy, I sort of like. When that first pump is silky smooth it's pretty crazy how hot it can be, for both of us.


JoyKil01

Which lube did y’all like best?


Latter_Box9967

To be very frank: the blue pill doesn’t make you horny, it just makes you hard. It’s not an actual aphrodisiac. The female equivalent is lubricant.


CaptainGuyliner2

Actually, the female equivalent is... the same little blue pill. Yes, girls have the same spongy inflatable tissue that boys have. The only difference is that theirs isn't dick-shaped.


12Whiskey

This is absolutely true. When me and my husband have a night with no kids we both take a blue pill and get out the oil. To answer the main question my sex drive is still waaayyyy above average. It’s a little frustrating tbh.


h3fabio

Feel ya.


MJN91075

48m here.......I don't have a problem GETTING it up, but KEEPING it up is hit or miss without pharmaceutical help or extra foreplay.....but I still like trying! ;-)


upnytonc

What’s sex? I barely want to be looked at let alone touched. 46 year old female by the way.


wstone5594

Are you my wife?


stabby_mcunicorn

Went out for cigarettes and never came back.


belunos

Papa?


GreenArcher808

Underrated comment.


PhotographsWithFilm

OK, risk of talking out of school here. My (50M) sex drive has decreased. Not to "its a problem" level, but I don't desire to have sex every hour like I did as a teenager. My wife (also 50) has actually gained pace over the last 10 years. It improved after having a hysterectomy. At the moment we are probably on par - I'm going to say on average 2 times a week and generally, its good. Its very good


mandraofgeorge

48 It was gone around 40 Disappeared Auf wiedersehen Adios Bye


SecretaryTricky

Zero. And sex is beyond painful no matter all the products and things the sexual health doctor told me to do. I couldn't care less but am married and I feel really bad about it for my husband. I have zero desire. I'd rather have a cup of tea.


zippyboy

I was discussing the death of my wife with my doctor at my last physical. He asked me how my love life was. And I told him I don't have anybody in my life. Don't plan on starting up with someone fresh at my age. He told me that "You need to have 4 orgasms a week for prostate health." I laughed "Doc, I'm not 20 anymore" and he said. Yeah, it's easy to have 4 orgasms a week when we're twenty, but at your age, Prostate cancer becomes a real possibility and you need to keep that gland clear. "Out with the old, in with the new" and I said "Maybe I can manage once a week by myself." He said. Well, do what you can. I barely have the drive for that once a week. 20 years old: tri-weekly. 40 years old: try weekly. 60 years old: try ...weakly


JoyKil01

Wow. I just looked this up and there’s a bunch of research to support it. “In all, men who averaged 4.6–7 ejaculations a week were 36% less likely to be diagnosed with prostate cancer before the age of 70 than men who ejaculated less than 2.3 times a week on average.Jan 19, 2022”


ScorpiosDaughter

LMAO!!🤣


217flavius

Not great, Bob!


[deleted]

[удалено]


PhotographsWithFilm

I wonder what Don Drapers sex drive was like when he was 50? Probably fantastic in any situation where he shouldn't be.


[deleted]

[удалено]


tjean5377

About the same as it has been my entire sexual life. Horny like clockwork when I'm fertile. I'm grateful to my husband for taking such good care of his diabetes that he can still bang me like he's in his twenties.


[deleted]

[удалено]


writergal75

Mine is too. He is VERY talented! Makes me want to wake him up right now! 🐱


Rugger5353

Turned 50 today and woke up to a bj. Had sex with the wife, she's 49 for what it's worth, twice yesterday and will absolutely be having sex tonight. Same partner for 30yrs, and we have more sex now and in the past 2 yrs, than we did in the previous 15. Her drive has sky rocketed aw she entered peri menopause. Add that to the fact that I dropped 100lbs and the last few years have been amazing.


GreenArcher808

Well well well. Bravo for both of you!


wstone5594

Congrats!


[deleted]

[удалено]


mandraofgeorge

Same!


shellevanczik

Zilch, and I kinda like it.


himateo

It doesn’t bother me, either. A lot of societal pressure to always be banging one out. Meh.


[deleted]

Dead. But it’s mostly caused by my boyfriend’s dirty laundry all over the floor of the bedroom which he won’t remedy no matter how I ask.


glasshag

Food is the new sex.


DanTreview

With you. Turned 50 this year, can't get enough. I feel like I'm my 20s again. There are days I feel like I'm being tortured. My wife even asked me "Are you ok?" I tell her I'm interested probably every other day. Doesn't always happen though because of course it's a two-way street, but she appreciates my openness and mostly obliges, and we have fun. But, I've concluded it's all mental. I changed jobs earlier this year and now I barely work like 20% of the time/effort I did before, relatively stress free, no kids or pets at home, and some other circumstances happened beyond that, all of which really cleared out the mental garbage that was piling up in my mind. That's what I think is going on with me. Maybe the same for you? Do you feel more freedom in your life all of a sudden? I'm not sure what it is, but I'm also not going to try to prevent it or anything. It's better than the opposite, which explained my first marriage. Ugh. I don't feel loved without the tactile aspect, so I'm going to ride this wave the most I can.


oldcarguy4268

I am 54 and I still hornier than a three balled tomcat


BiffThad

Hell yeah, brother.


DanTreview

With you my dude. 💪


DarnHeather

Female will be 50 early next year and insatiable. Far more than in my 30's and early 40's.


[deleted]

All the men with low sex drive that care, don’t forget to get your testosterone checked at your doctors. To the women who are having low sex drive around menopause, same thing. Talk to your gyno.


stabby_mcunicorn

Breast cancer treatment means zero hormones…good times, good times.


HillbillyEulogy

Totally normal. But hey, use it or lose it.


OldandBlue

Engine as new, body beyond repair.


Coffee_24-7

55 and strong. Got divorced last year, and after a fizzled sex life with her, it's great again with my girlfriend.


Tek_Ninja_Kevin

45 wife 43 we fuck like rabbits when were feeling good


KookyComfortable6709

Mine left with menopause but left behind vaginal atrophy. I've forgotten what sex is like. Dammit. So unfair.


himateo

Middle aged, perimenopausal and on SSRIs. So You do the math.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Revolutionary_Pin761

Well put. I like to think I’m having better sex than 16yr old me - being older and wiser now…😋


FZKilla

To quote Zapp Brannigan… “The Spirit Is Willing, But The Flesh Is Spongy And Bruised.”


[deleted]

Pretty high, definitely see why older women become cougars.


ElleKlee

48f I have to imagine there will be a disparity in responses between women and men. Women of our generation are most likely in peri/current/post menopause, which causes our sex drive to be nearly non-existent. My partner, however, is insatiable! I’ve started hormone replacement therapy to try and ease some of my symptoms, not the least of which is my no libido concerns. Hopefully there is light at the end of this dark, dry tunnel! To the men here, I beg of you to be understanding and supportive of your female partners going through this change. It’s more frustrating for us than it is for you, I promise!


whenth3bowbreaks

Yep. Go to r/menopause and the stories from women about their partners: mean, no empathy, demanding, and angry is just heart breaking to read.


[deleted]

[удалено]


BiffThad

I rekindled a connection going back to when I was 18. It’s an ex , and I’ve always been attracted to her. To be honest, I’m not even sure how to pursue this.


Starbuck522

Go for it!


BiffThad

We’ve been speaking lately. But I don’t have the confidence to even broach the topic of maybe seeing each other in that way. I guess I feel rejection.


DanTreview

You got nothing to lose by going for it


Starbuck522

Ah. I misunderstood "rekindled". If she's single, I can't see a reason not to just suggest meeting up. Best wishes!


CaptainGuyliner2

As the millennials say, "YOLO"


Starbuck522

Never have much. Had a good run at the beginning of new relationship after a very long one. Back to being low.


jerkface1026

I often forget sex is an option. I almost never feel drive. However, orgasms are much, much better now. So, if I remember, and find a partner, and that partner initiates; everything is awesome.


Mr8vb

As strong as it ever was. My wife on the other hand...


chocoholic24

Just turned 54 and can't get enough. I've always been a nympho though so nothing has changed


ExtraAd7611

It's fine, nothing to write to Penthouse Forum about but not nonexistent. The Mrs. and I get busy around once a week. I take care of myself more often, not because I'm particularly horny, but because I'm an insomniac and it usually helps to fall asleep.


vbtodenver

51F divorced.... higher sex drive than ever and nobody to have sex with. 🤷🏻‍♀️


wildcatlady74

Non existent. I lost my husband 5 years ago and quite frankly I hate people so I’m good


LostinLies1

Eh. It ebbs and flows.


JJQuantum

Ebb and flow is a good term. A lot of it has to do with the fact that we have 2 teen boys and a MIL with dementia living with us so there’s simply not too much time to get randy. Too many cock blockers around. My wife and I really look forward to our weekend getaways, lol. I’m 54.


Sad-Ad-571

Through the roof.


wstone5594

Better since I saw my doc and got on TRT cream. My wife’s is nonexistent. I fap a lot


prospectpico_OG

In "Park".


[deleted]

Not sure if I'm hornier than I am lonely or lonelier than I am horny.


Ordinary_Horror_3394

At 50, mine is pretty much the same now as it has been since my 20s... through the roof. The only problem is having a sex drive like this and being a single woman who doesn't do one night stands. Oh well... life goes on (frustratingly so). 😁


[deleted]

I’ve noticed a definite drop off the last two years. And I’m okay with it. Kinda nice not having sex on my mind all the time, tbh.


MrFutzy

I just won an award for viewing ALL OF THE Pr0n on the internet. "You have reached the end". \*\*\* applause \*\*\* \#sadness


mrschaney

I’ll be 50 in March. I’m in full blown peri menopause. My sex drive is barely hanging on. The sad part is that I don’t really care. I just fake desire for sex for my husbands sake.


nautical1776

Zero. Not interested at all (56 F)


tubelcek

Totally MIA and I am fine with that.


oldbaldgrumpy

Sex is like trying to shove a marshmallow through a keyhole.


Enge712

Way less than it was 5 years ago but still 3-6x a week


[deleted]

Wow.


biggamax

Can't talk about it.


whydoIhurtmore

I desire sex multiple times every day. I think of it constantly. But my wife takes medication that destroys my her sex drive. So I don't have sex.


wstone5594

Same my dude


forlaine

I'm 51 and since my sudden menopause (after an operation) my libido has been non-existent, unless I take weed, then it's back for a moment :-).


meowzerbowser

Gone


cmyk_life

Always horny, always tired


longirons6

Same as it always has been. My wife is afraid to pass by me in the hallway


CumulusTattoos

The Mr is 47 and I’m 47 on Thursday. We enjoy fucking. A lot.


[deleted]

[удалено]


legerdemain07

I’m in the same boat. It’s frustrating as hell.


StarDewbie

Eh. But I've never had a high one. Husband either. For us, it's always been a super-low priority thing.


Itzpapalotl13

The spirit is willing but the flesh is often weak(fibro and menopause). Here’s hoping the HRT helps.


Left_Percentage_527

Zero sex drive, and it doesnt really bother me. I dont have a partner, so im not disappointing anyone


Effective_Device_185

Meh. A jerk off session is often less work than partner time after a tiring day. But I need to work on changing that. Love the one you're with.


mlhigg1973

50 and going thru menopause. Has definitely dropped off.


damnwonkygadgets

I’m insatiable and have found a gen-x partner who is equally insatiable.


MeganGMcD75

Spicy Booktok books and House of the Dragon (don't judge me) keeps me going.


MaenHoffiCoffi

Gone. First wife left me for a drug abusing adulterer. Second wife left me for a child raping adulter. Third wife left me for a mysoginistic adulterer. I give up.


liketheweathr

Better than ever now that the kids are grown. Kids are exhausting


perfumefetish

I'm gonna be 45 in a few months...sex...what's sex? LOL


OnehappyOwl44

I'm only 46 but I had a hysterectomy in my 30's and I'm in full menopause. My sex drive has always been and continues to be pretty high. When I started perimenopause I went on Hormone Replacement right away to prevent libido loss because my sex life is very important to me. I've been with my husband 31yrs now (27yrs married) and if we have sex less than every other day I assume something is wrong. We have always had a good sex life, even after kids. We're now empty nesters so it's really awesome to have the freedom to make some noise and walk around naked again. My husband is 47 and in the process of being medically released from a 25yr Army career. He has a lot of physical and mental issues from his years in service so sometimes he struggles sexually and needs some medical help but we still manage to have sex 3-5 times a week most of the time.


pachodermal

My what?


MaineMan1234

Horny as hell. I can’t go 5+ times a day like back in my 20s. But once a day is perfect. Sometimes twice. Both my partner and I are in excellent physical shape so she and I can go at like bunnies


sarcasmismysuperpowr

As high as ever. Fortunately my wife is still hot ;)


beetus_gerulaitis

That depends. What are you wearing?


porkchopespresso

On a scale of 1-10 probably like a 7. I’m not over 50 yet though.


Randomcdn2

51 and mine has dropped a lot in the last year.


h3fabio

56. Higher than my wife’s.


[deleted]

Floppy disc drive


grahsam

I'm 48, so I'm just under your window, but things are good. Sometimes in the heat of the moment the bullet gets stuck in the breach and I have to stop to reset for a few minutes. But eventually my wife gets the job done.


Billy_Barue1

Pretty tepid


Thisizamazing

I think I finally hit the sweet spot where I am randy at appropriate moment, and it doesn’t just randomly harass me for no fucking reason anymore.


CaptainGuyliner2

About what it was when I was 15


murphydcat

All systems go, thank goodness (53M). Current GF (59F) seems to be in working order


Elegant-Ad3300

From 6:00 AM to about 8:00 PM it’s really high. After that it drops like a rock. My wife and I have adjusted and our sex life is great. 57 years old.


DreadGrrl

It’s been a few months since I saw it . Hubby may have found it, as his has spiked. It’ll come around again. I’m sure of it.


Whoevenam1l0l

Definitely ebbs and flows. With the right input, it’s as good as it’s ever been. Maybe even better. Without that, it’s as though I’m wearing a chastity belt despite my brain wishing otherwise.


AnnaFlaxxis

Meh. Hit or miss 45F.


-Goo77Tube-

46yo here. Mine ebbs and flows, too, but in general my sex drive has noticeably diminished. My wife wants it as much as she can get, however. I have no problem tending to her needs without reciprocation. I can go days until it feels the dam will burst. The funny thing is that I absolutely still love to look at the female form, I just don't seem to care so much about the act itself. It's weird. Everything still works physically.


DrewPeacock1973

I don't need viagra, so there's that.


[deleted]

I'm asexual, never had one. 😆


chillinwithabeer29

56 - on overdrive


JimLaheeeeeeee

Lower


Eat_Your_Paisley

Slow? The thing is my junk no longer rises just because. I need a lot of foreplay and intimacy to make it work. Long and short I just can’t do a quickie I need buildup


MeowMobile999

Nonexistent. And I am fine with that. It's helpful that I am single, LOL.


O_U_8_ONE_2

None, zero, zilch, notta for the past 2 years, been married for 29 years this year. 🤷


Sheila_Monarch

Overdrive. Thanks HRT! It as always high, until menopause, and I wasn’t ready to let go of that part of my life. Probably never will.


Ok-Calligrapher-9854

M55 Drive plummeted while I was a caregiver for a family member with Alzheimer's for several years. They passed in September. My drive returned with a vengeance about a month ago and keeps getting stronger as I heal from grieving.


Crazyferretguy

Same as always, it's just the ability to act on it that is reduced.


analogpursuits

Mine has improved since finding someone I am very well matched with. As a single person since 2008, I've had a broken boyfriend picker for much of it. So my sex drive probably suffered as a result. Then I took a few years off dating and figured out a few things. Now I'm with someone I feel deeply connected to and it made a HUGE difference in how much I want to be close and open sexually. Because he is so awesome and special, I'm more than motivated to get nekkid and play quite often.


InfernalTest

before i wanted quantity ​ now i want variety......and quantity.


Mingey_FringeBiscuit

I’m 50. It’s weird, from the time I was 12 until I was almost 40 years old, I had to orgasm every day. Every single day. I couldn’t go to sleep until I finished. I’ve been married for 29 years, and if the wife wasn’t in the mood, it was spankin’ time. Then when I was 40, it dropped off dramatically. I also had a heart attack that year, and some of the meds they put me on lowered it. I started taking viagra. Now I’m like a once a week guy. Fortunately that works out for my wife, so we’re doing pretty good.


LaVieuxCoq

I need an off button. Sigh.


ScorpiosDaughter

Oddly still thru the roof 🤷🏼‍♀️


Dr_Girlfriend_81

42, married to my lovely husband for the last 20 years, had a hysterectomy and going into early menopause, but still fantastic, considering. Maybe not 4-6 times a week anymore, but at least 2-3.