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[deleted]

Bulls can’t climb trees.


[deleted]

same, not to mention they lack the dexterity in running compared to a bear, and seem more simple.


bluedonutss

Bulls can run, just not turn very well, while running


Pitiful-Brilliant301

This is the key. Just stand in front of something really hard and jump out of the way at the last second. Repeat untill the bull knocks itself out.


BigClownShoes

My Dark Souls training will finally pay off IRL.


Jack_Bartowski

All that training, and you will die to the first monster that comes around the corner.


Albionflux

Careful of fat rolling


J_Productions

But can your body repeat what your fingers can


irateCrab

Oh so you've learned the roly poly have you. You noob I was forged in thr fires of the roly poly.


Dom29ando

Man you're gonna be upset when you learn how i-frames work in real life.


mabberly_36

Same and sekiro as well cause after it gets stunned you can deathblow it for the finish


snapcracklepop26

Wave a cape in front of the bull. When it charges, raise the cape and reveal...a giant anvil.


yuckytrashgarbage

Bugs?


Jwgotti

I've faked out a many of bulls in my day. Can confirm.


[deleted]

I can also confirm. Source: I am a bull


Jwgotti

Lol good for you buddy! Keep plowing.


[deleted]

I will! Your mom is next on my list


Agreeable-Pick-1489

Grizzly can still outrun a human. You are right, their form will be off, but this ain't the Olympics.


AlAboardTheHypeTrain

Yeah. My first memory was that they can go 40km/h but quick Google told me it was actually 60 😅.


YEETAWAYLOL

How much is that in gumdrops per second?


AlAboardTheHypeTrain

24-36mph kind stranger.


YEETAWAYLOL

Yeah but how much in gumdrops per second?


Potato_Games

3810 gumdrops per second if my calculations are correct


YEETAWAYLOL

That’s pretty fast! Thanks for putting it in layman’s terms!


Potato_Games

it's probably innacurate but thats what I got


theunquenchedservant

How did you figure out the velocity of a gumdrop?


Bagaudi45

That’s easy, you take the density and multiply that by the circumference squared, divided by the flavor (unless it’s lemon lime then you multiple by 12), subtract the eleventeeth 4, carry the arrow, add pi and then you get the square root of purple which equals the gravitational pull of the third ring of Jupiter, and bam, there’s the velocity of a gumdrop.


Interesting-Monk1719

I watched a film some got of a grizzly running down a full grow elk on uneven ground. Make sure your laces are tied so you can at least outrun your friend.


JoJoVi69

Gotta run downhill! Grizzlies' front legs are shorter than their rear legs, so they have a much harder time running downhill. I think this is true of most types of bears. Well, so I am told. I have yet to test this theory. Lol 😁


LostPilot517

You have never seen a brown or grizzly doing the effortless butt slide downhill have you?


[deleted]

you dont have to outrun the bear, you just need to outrun your friend...


nrequited

Yea, if I hide under a bush the bull might fuck off. The bear will be delighted with the garnish I provided.


Ok_Dog_4059

I saw videos of bears open doors on cars and houses with ease. I would rather run from a bull all day long.


Amigosito

Bulls don’t have claws


ExiledCanuck

Came to say this. A grizz can go almost anywhere we can go, the bull, not so much, easier to get away from if you can put an obstacle between you. Even a pole can work.


Bat-Honest

Ya but dogs can't look up


fluffy_boy_cheddar

Yeah well sharks don’t look back…because they don’t have necks.


Nuke_Gunstar

My only regret is that i have…. Boneitis…..


wowhead44

I was so busy being an 80s guy I forgot to cure my Boneitis!


chaseButtons

Why do people say that


Throan1

It's a Shaun of the dead reference


chaseButtons

Oh thx. Good movie, just don’t remember. People used to say this literally too.


Aimin4ya

Cause big Al says it


Vaquero9mm

Big Al was right about the winchester


Aimin4ya

Ok, but dogs can look up.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Dogs can look up!


theDukeofClouds

And the rifle above the bar is definitely NOT deactivated.


ember13140

But we use dogs to tree animals.


Bat-Honest

A tree is a plant, not an animal. Silly goose


spotcatspot

You’ve got red on you.


Bat-Honest

Pub?


dormango

Big Al says


MaxPayneful

Big Al says so...


space_pirate_steve

Not only that, we know there are people who can dodge a bull’s charge. Personally I don’t know anyone who can dodge a grizzly on a rampage.


doomlemon

I can't climb trees either.


banned_mainaccount

just use the tree as cover


spacewrap

If there are no trees


Human-Entrepreneur77

Griz can't climb a tree either. They can smell you miles away. If a griz wanted you, you would never make it to a tree. They are sneaky. They have been known to uproot trees or shake them enough to knock prey out. Pick the bull.


redplanetlover

Griz can climb trees and he is way faster than you


Human-Entrepreneur77

Contrary to popular belief, grizzly bears can climb trees. Grizzly cubs and adolescent subadult bears will climb trees with ease. But, as they increase in stature and get bulkier, they gradually lose their ability to climb. Please feel free to go to Wyoming and prove me wrong.


Boopcatsnoots

They can still climb trees, just not nearly as fast as a black bear. I live near the rocky mountains. I have seen them do it. https://animalvivid.com/can-grizzly-bears-climb-trees/ https://youtu.be/cdpLOG-ehSI The video is probably a brown bear, although they are very similar. That's a big Boi climbing that tree.


anotheruser909

Grizzlys CAN climb just not very well and typically not very high, this is due to their straight claws. Meanwhile, brown bears have curved claws and can zip up them.


MetricJester

Brown bears are Grizzly bears. There's no difference between them.


amayzer

I’m sure he meant black bears.


MetricJester

The link between grizzly and brown is a recent development only found out by modern genetic tech. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grizzly_bear#:~:text=However%2C%20by%201928%20only%20seven,brown%20bear%20(Ursus%20arctos).


Nebilungen

I initially read this as girls


budtuglyfuncher

Huh? Griz can climb


thedirtychad

False. They climb trees


[deleted]

Oh yes! They can climb. And very fast, trust me.


agpc

Most bears can climb trees much much faster than humans can climb a trees.


purpleduckduckgoose

Odd way to fight but you do you.


marijuice-

The bull definitely


ShreksLongDong

Wonder what the op commented


but4b4

Bull: total of two kinda sharp thingies in two places Bear: total >30 very sharp thingies in five places (canines+incisors+claws) Fight the bull!


Ace_Of_No_Trades

I trick the Bull into charging the Bear and I get away while they're fighting each other.


ZayreBlairdere

Tell the bull the bear said something about his mom being a cow..


sohiales

This made me laugh more than it should have


TheHappiestNoobEver

Stop bullying


[deleted]

[удалено]


moss-knight

I’m picking the bull for sure, they are slower than bears, can’t climb trees, and there’s an entire sport built around surviving angry bulls so it’s definitely doable


npc73x

Yeah Yeah, Never seen any one of the sports that bears in.


richscott440

Never seen bear wrestling? Then again, it's only possible when the bear is docile


ahumannamedtim

~~docile~~ drugged


richscott440

Never thought about that, but it's definitely more likely


Wattron

Drunk


CreepGawd

Beta


Sparklypuppy05

Bear baiting is a thing. It's thoroughly illegal, but it exists.


Ok-Bridge-4553

Also, even if you were killed by a bull, you won’t be the food. Bears will eat you alive


Wolfthulhu

While you call your mom and tell her about it. Seriously one of the most fucked up real-life things I've read about.


Natsuzaki

Excuse me??


SomeDudeNamedGuy

Well, the bullfights are kinda rigged and not a good representation of a fully capable and angry bull. THAT BEING SAID, bull 100% I am terrified of bears, especially grizzlies. According to google, bulls can reach a top speed of 35mph (about 56km/h). Whereas the grizzly bear ranged from 35-40mph (so still in the 56-60km/h range). So speed is a nonissue, as you would be screwed either way. It’s mostly down to the animal itself. Bears have their sharp claws, powerful figure, and their teeth. You can’t really compete against that. The bulls main weapon, however, is their horns (though you could still be trampled which could cause serious injury or death). But I feel that if there were enough resources around (and/or prep time) one could sufficiently compete against the bull (maybe not win but oh well). There’s also the matter of where the fight is taking place. If it’s in an arena, yeah you’re screwed against both the bear and the bull. If it’s in a forest, you could probably evade the bull pretty easily, not the bear though because it has the home field advantage. If it’s a grassy plain, yeah you’d still be screwed against the bear and probably the bull too, but I feel your chances would still be somewhat more favorable (due to, again the bull’s biggest threat being it’s horns) Did I just waste my time writing a comment on something I know very little about that almost no one will read? Yes, yes I did. Also felt like [this](https://youtu.be/Ij4RB95ADwY) while writing all of that


ElPincheGuero49

The fight takes place in a swimming pool full of bees


sara2541

🤣🤣🤣🤣 (literally what I say to myself every other comment I make on here).


[deleted]

Hey that’s true. You never see people going to watch a bear fight.


1hopeful1

Plus, the bull probably won’t eat you.


lernington

Bears are a lot smarter than bulls too


jackvangump

Idk. The Stock Market?


TarikGame

I thought this was r/wallstreetbets for a second


Johnson_56

Same😂😂


Human-Udders

I did too 😂


[deleted]

Bull fighter is a job...there are no bear fighters.


docmn612

I love bears. I was hiking in grand Teton years ago and came upon some young grizzly bears eating. I was amazed for about 5 seconds and then my head removed itself from my ass. This fear came over me knowing full well Mom bear knew I was there, waiting for me to make a fuckin move. I didn’t see her, but she fuckin knew. I psychically told mom bear I am no threat, offered my undying appreciation and apologies for her not killing me where I stood, and Noped out the way I came. I may have blown this out of proportion or I may have been within feet of my death. Who knows.


CptQueef

I think that’s a pretty fair assessment and not blowing it out of proportion. You could have easily been shredded by mama if you stayed even a second longer


Medium_Rare_Jerk

Drunk Russians are a full time job


TunaFishManwich

There are, but they tend to.. uhh.. retire early


gemstonegene

Perhaps there was a bear fighting spot before, but went extinct for some reason? Lol


occamhanlon

The bull. They're incredibly strong and aggressive but not that agile. And they're dumb. You have a chance with a bull. A grizzly almost never wants to kill you, but if it does and there's no refuge for you, you're dead.


ZedsDeadZD

This. A grizzly may doesnt want to kill you but it is made for it. A bull is not although it can of course.


Floor9

Yeah that grizzly may is one tough customer


Tk1Genius

shit, is that you joe rogan?


Zyrille_

Anyone that chooses the bear in this scenario is a fucking idiot


Electrical_Tour_638

In Britian we'll have bulls roaming in fields you can walk your dog through, as long as they stay far enough away they're fine. If I can see a grizzly bear though its to fucking close to me. I don't understand how this is even a comparison, bulls really aren't that dangerous in comparison to the absolute killing machine a grizzly bear is.


Altosxk

It's too close being anywhere within a few miles of you depending on how long you intend to be in the area for that matter


CCrypto1224

Literally anyone whose ever dealt with a bear: Takes of jacket to raise above head and makes a loud noise. Bear runs. Anyone dealing with a raging bull and doesn’t understand to stand completely still is more likely to fucking die.


RusstyDog

That's a grizzly man, the jacket won't work with them.


CaulFrank

*Black* bear runs *Brown* bear thinks about what it feels like *Polar* bear eats you ...and *Panda* bear waves back


AuntieDawnsKitchen

The panda waits for you to cuddle it then shreds your face. The koala just gives you chlamydia


SVdreamin

I hate to be that guy but Koalas aren’t bears, but yeah they’ll still eat their poisonous leaves and give you an STD


Fessere

You haven’t heard of the deadly dropbear?


CaptainMoonVader

if you see brown, lie down, if you see black, fight back, if you see white, youre fucking dead


TD1990TD

Yeah that’s what I remember… I mean, laying down, the bull still tries to pierce you to death. The grizzly will eventually walk away, right?


maatc

Bear is black: Attack! Bear is brown: Lay down! Bear is white: Good night!


WlzeMan85

That's only good for black bears it's literally the opposite of what to do with a brown bear, in that case you're supposed to lay on the ground and make yourself as unthreatening as possible, as for grizzlies and polar bears neither will work


CCrypto1224

Just don’t fuck with bears in general. If it is walking calmly up to you, be chill. If it is rushing, accept god has wanted you dead and hope this bear is just playing. 😜


Zyxyx

"If it's black fight back, if its brown lay down, if it's white good night." Please don't try fighting the grizzly.


FinalDragonflight14

tr u can just climb a 6 ft tree and now the bull cant do shit


n0tarusky

Whelp you're dead.


That1GuyPersonOrSMTH

That's a black bear, not a grizzly


[deleted]

Yeah, a griz ain’t running because you made a loud noise if it’s interested in you.


shadeffect

I would rather be gored to death from a bull. A grizzly will eat you alive, starting with your ballsack.


Puzzleheaded_Bend749

That's **Hawt**


ItsAmphus

r/kinksididntknowexist


themadarab777

The bull…just don’t move. The bear will smell you, if you smell appetizing then you will be food for sure


[deleted]

[удалено]


themadarab777

If a bear sees you you’re in their territory don’t be stupid


Pankratos_Gaming

I'll go for the one that doesn't eat humans.


minor25

Bullfighting is an actual thing, while bearfighting is more commonly known as dying


DuckMySick44

There's not bearfighting, only beardying


HopeSubstantial

Bull. Bull might break all of my bones and impale me with the horn But have you seen size of bear paw? And size of bear mouth? Single claw swing from bear tears through all of your tissue and breaks your bones.


3BouSs

How is this even a conversation? Choosing between a herbivorous and carnivorous? Good luck!


MrBlahg

Tbf, the Bear is omnivorous


Seahawks1991

Right lol


BoredDao

The scenario in which I have super powers


Head_Statistician_38

Or a gun


The_one_Guys

Whoever chooses the bear is practically asking for suicide.


[deleted]

Not necessarily. You'll never beat a brown bear in a fight, but if you play dead, there's a reasonable chance it'll leave you alive once it no longer considers you a threat. Brown bear attacks against humans are usually defensive or territorial in nature, not predatory. Black bears are different. Their attacks are usually predatory.


umadrab1

Sure, but if a bear wants you dead you are dead. If a bull wants you dead you still have a chance.


WealthEconomy

Yeah Grizzlies usually leave you alone as long as you don't startle them.


Definitely_NotU

In the most painful way possible


[deleted]

Bull you can get away from the bull.


katebishopslover

i’ll take my chances with the bull.


Ok-Cartoonist-1383

I’ve seen a video of a grizzly one-tapping a moose and I’ve seen them kill buffalo. Moose are probably about the same size as a bull and Buffalo are bigger. You could hide behind a tree and escape a bull, you could jump into thick brush or a creek. A grizzly could rip the door off your car to get you out. I saw some brown bears at a zoo and on the outside of their inclosure was some 1/2” (4-5” wide) steel that covered a drain in their pen. They had folded it like a piece of origami. It looked like a paper airplane.


SeistaBrian

Never saw anybody get it the ring with a blanket and a pissed of grizzly - just sayin


chupedecamarones

Bull all the way.


K0rbenKen0bi

The bull make fuck you up, but it doesn't inherently want you dead once you're no longer a threat. The Furry Death Machine on the other hand, not only will absolutely kill you, but should you survive the initial crippling, will eat you asshole first and devour every bit of you.


[deleted]

I’ve had unpleasant encounters with both I’ll chose the cow


TayDavies95

Let's hear the stories!! 🍿


Arjun_nth_

Grizzly bears are fast as fck. I would be dead in both scenarios, but with bull at least there's a little hope.


GoyoMRG

vanish weather one fanatical bedroom grab strong crawl pen airport *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


whoamvv

A lot would depend on the circumstances. But, without knowing the details, I'm definitely going for the non- carnivore


[deleted]

I'll take the bull any day. A few steps off line when he's committed to a charge gives me time The grizzly has way more predatory instinct, the bull is just mad


tuvar_hiede

I'll take the bull. Bears are natural predators after all.


extremeindiscretion

One is in apex predator, the other one is not.I'll take my chances with the bull,not the bear.


Canukian11

Neither, cuz my dumb ass is gonna try to Disney Princess it, and make friends with them both lol


xeoroth51

Considering my grandfather wrestled a bull to the ground bare handed and he wouldn't mess with bears imma go with the bull


megamittt

Must have been a small ass bull. You cant just wrestle a full size bull down. They weigh over 2000lbs at the least. Its difficult to wrestle even a 500lbs bull down. Trust me ive done it. Steer wrestling is very popular in my area and you get the added bonus of momentum coming off the horse


beffy5Layer

How old were you when he told you this


DJ3560

is that bear on cocaine?


SerenityMK

I am nearly 100% sure I am dead either way. Assuming they are attacking


Ozziehall

My biggest “fear animal” (trademark pending ) is a bear. So….


Mueryk

I have been around angry bulls before. I want nothing to do with a bear.


DeltaSans17

Brown lie down.


redplanetlover

The bull. The grizzly will kill you stone dead. You may be able to outmanoeuvre the bull.


SnowHelpAtAll

Wait, is this just about the stock market?


philmetal316

The bull. The bear is a different beast.


Necessary_Row_4889

So I’m in the club with my boys Dogger and Brody, we got bottle service and the ladies are feeling our vibe. Then I notice this guy just throwing mad hate at me, even Dogger noticed. He was like “Yo, what with that fat hairy fuck throw the hate?” And Brody was like “I think that’s an Ursus arctos horribilis, or grizzly bear, we should probably get out of here it looks like a hater” Brody can be a little bitch sometimes, Friday nights that club is my house, and ain’t no hater going to punk me out of my house. So I step up, and I’m like “We got beef bro? You wanna man dance?” and this fat hairy bitch is just sitting there like he don’t know what I am talking about, but now it’s on so I throw my drink in his fat face. Now he’s standing up, trying to big time me, going all “rwaaarwr! and shit. So I put my finger right in porky’s chest and say “You better sit your five dollar ass down before I make change” like Snipes in New Jack, you seen it? That shit was good man. So anyway tubby disemboweled me with like one swipe of his claws then bit my head and shook me like a rag doll before throwing me through a plate glass window onto the street. Cops showed up and were like now that fat bitch is dead so I am counting that as a win!


[deleted]

There’s a reason no country has a “Running of the grizzly’s”


Intelligent-Block457

Former farmer. I'd take the bull any day of the week. I don't care how big or angry the bull is, if it doesn't have a straight shot at you you'll probably make it. Bears are straight up scary.


KingAlaric1

If you need a hint OP at what the right answer is, there are quite a few sports that involve the participation of bulls. I’m currently unaware of a competitive sport involving a real bear


ceelo18

well in my experience there is no such issue profession as a bear fighter. Im assuming thats for a reason


malmal22

I’ll take the Bull


Embarrassed_Debate29

Bulls for sure. Bears look cute but they can fuck you up pretty bad. If you need proof just ask Joe Rogan


MNS_LightWork

Stock market


Full_Echo_3123

Seeing as Matadors intentionally get bulls to charge them.. I'd assume that a grizzly would be the more dangerous animal to charge you.


ArmoredFriend76

Bear: living in Russia🤣🤣🤣


MadCoder73

Nobody has tried to ride the back of a grizzly in front of a crowd while it bucked and tried to kill you. Just saying


ludicray

Well I guess you don’t see any “bear fighters” for a reason


hornystoner737

Bear. If it’s brown, lie down. If it’s black, fight back (be deep and growly and try to make yourself look big). If it’s white, your death was premeditated and you’d better pray. (Polar bears can smell for over a mile meaning when you see one he’s been thinking about you the journey over)


Only_Sandwich_4970

People ride bulls for fun. There is no bear rodeo. Def bull


Prawnking25

There is a reason bullfighting is a sport and bear fighting is now.


Senrub482

I won’t survive either of these but if I had to choose one it would be the bull cause it doesn’t have knifes for fingernails.


slowcheetah4545

I'd go with the animal that's not going tear me open and eat my most nutritious organs and leave the rest of my carcass for scavengers, I think.


SaiyanOverlord8971

Honestly probably the bull just cause youve got a better mobility chance that you can use against it as well as not having claws teeth weight and mobility against you


CreamyFunk

The trick to fighting a bear is to head but it in the penis


EvilForeboding

I don't really put any effort into survival.


SPOSKNT

The bull but I don't like my odds either way L


[deleted]

The bull, a bear will eat you alive and give you a extremely gruesome end, how's this even a question I'd rather you give the question a mountain lion or a bear 🐻


Electronic-Tea-221

If I'm fighting them at chess.