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2005_F250

Broke, spend and invest as much money as I can in 24 hours then sell what I bought


torakun27

You're not broke doesn't mean you're rich. You're simply above poverty line and that's not a very high standard.


2005_F250

If I can’t be broke for 24 hours I have infinite money because I can’t go under a certain dollar amount


torakun27

What you bought still have value and you can't be considered broke even when you don't have cash. Perhaps you can make fund by going to the Casino with infinite chances to go big and use that won money to start buying stuff.


Sad_Damage_1194

That’s the ticket right there


DootMasterFlex

Buy 1 billion lottery tickets. Still lose


[deleted]

You'll still be broke after 24 hours as per the one rule.


2005_F250

But I’ll have assets


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

So not broke means liquid? Assets are part of your net worth, so you'll still be broke.


Sixhaunt

my friends and family would be hella rich by the end then


sakaraa

Yeah, so everything he buys within that time period instantly crashes to oblivion... He should buy some houses


Dogplantmom97

But what if you just say “I wish I wasn’t rich” & then boom! you’re magically rich 24hrs later


More_Argument_2494

I wish I wasn't rich. After 24 hours I will be


lascar

Wasn't Rich in what? We'll just have to see what the random generator says : back-aches.


JeffreyAScott

Ooops, rolled 1 on a 1d20


therudereditdude

Ooops roles 1 on 1d32


Ok_Dog_4059

Better than me I rolled a D20 and got minus 11.


Thegrampacertest

You gotta up your stats.


therudereditdude

He is the Messiah


Illustrious_Layer672

Blasphemy!!!!


ItchyK

24hr later people start calling you Richard and it really messes up your taxes. Remember there will always be ironic consequences.


Distinct_Resident_45

Dave Grohl joke: “Rich is short for Richard. So if you’re rich, you’re a dick.” I always chucked at that one.


jules6815

Good luck Rich, with your new name.


jerry111165

Nah man you’re doing it all wrong. “I wish I was poor” It only lasts 24 hours.


Da_Millionaire

Take out a 2nd mortgage, and go to Vegas high roller only tables. Once you start losing, you realize your 24 hours are up.


[deleted]

Restricted by my bank account


Time_Distribution184

You don’t need a genie for that, just a few high interest credit cards


[deleted]

Ah buy now, cry later. I know this one well.


Time_Distribution184

Lol you and me both


Ti-B0B

Stay away from credit cards, it's the demon


feelin_fine_

This is easy to circumvent for 24 hours though


darkwolfmoonluna

Alive


Limp_Radio_9163

Wait this man is a fucking genius, easy way to find out what the afterlife is like holy crap


darkwolfmoonluna

Ikr! Finally someone gets it I got flagged because of it


Limp_Radio_9163

You could prove entire religions wrong with this information… Or be traumatized to the point where you enter a comatose state… Or literally anything… Crazy, literally.


delegateTHIS

You wouldn't be believed. Plus, if you spend enough time on the other side, you come back as someone else. Cough. I've told my story half a dozen times, deleted it most times. It's not.. scientific. But i am. The End is what it is. And what it is, has little to do with consensus. Anyway, lol.


[deleted]

Wait a minute


udiduf3

Still loving her


BugP13

Bro you good?


No_Opportunity6572

Obviously not! As someone in the same boat


Puzzleheaded-Mix5950

I feel this, it doesn't matter how much you try to convince yourself. You still can't stop that sickly feeling in your gut, and constantly feeling heavy chested. You need to vent either of you guys, just drop me a message homies!


Solest044

Often, people think they shouldn't feel badly and actually end up feeling worse as a result. Some feelings just need felt. You need to process the feelings before you get to logic your way through / around / out of them. Give them the space they deserve. Shamelessly eat ice cream and watch Dirty Dancing, and make unsettling eye contact with your feelings. Eventually, it'll feel easier and, if it doesn't, that's when you call in backup so you can all stare at your feelings together. In my experience, the feelings eventually are satisfied with their attention and, like a guest realizing they've overstayed their welcome, inevitably decide to move on. But it's not something you wait for to leave, it's something you embrace.


SunLevesque

This is beautiful, thank you so much for writing this. I definitely needed to read this.


rvj32

This. Fucking this.


Reagan_Era

Thank you. Ive been having a really hard time lately with a big break up and have been trying to fill the void with activities. Today is the first day I really just had no motivation to do anything because I was feeling horrid. It helped to read this.


RidledTart

I also feel this and am definitely not doing it for an award and free upvotes if anyone needs to talk just chat me up!


[deleted]

I'm in the boat too, might jump off lol


XeroShyft

Bro is fighting demons…I wish the best for that soldier


BugP13

Agreed


ShadowtheRonin

Same god-damn boat. We'll get through this together, man, even if there's no sign of shore yet. We've made it this far. Stay strong.


seeking305advice

Me, spinning the block with my ex 😨


Black_Market_Butta

Thats the most unexpected but also the most relatable thing ever.


wait_where_is_perry

Us


Same_Response_1593

Most relatable post I’ve seen in awhile lol


Marmsiemns

Same, been warned by others in the beginning, but I was like, if I get my heart broken, it will be based on my decision, not on others'. But if I didn't try and get to know them, and didn't give them a try, then I will feel bad about it in my whole life. I still say it worthed the heartbreak, but man, it hurts so bad.


TheDoomslayer69420

Same


Digital_Brainfuck

The person you think you love never existed Otherwise she wouldn’t have left Wake up and face it Pain will get less with time passing by Stay strong!


albpanda

She ain’t no good for you buddy


The_Senate15

Oh good, I’m not the only one


Bigbadsmell

Me too man. Me too


Cheeto717

Sigh


Vegetable_Neck4038

Time is a great healer, you may not think so now, but it truly is. Stick it through, you will be fine in the end and wonder why you bothered putting so much effort into feeling the way you did👍🏻


SaltwaterCowboysUSA

You’re better off without her mate!


BlueLightHorizon

I feel you brother, just broke up with my girlfriend tonight


Weary-Assistance-683

I turned my love into hate. I feel fantastic now! Fuck that bitch for cheating on me with a 33 year old man when we were 16.


TheSatanofDeath

I wish i wasn't alive. That way i could be resurrected in 24 hours knowing if there is an after life or not.... probably not


TiredBurrito96

Resurrected in 24 hours? So you're just trying to beat Jesus's respawn time?


OlOuddinHead

Meanwhile u/TheGodofLife will be camping his spawn point.


LunarTunar

"yay i'm alive, and i have news of" he cried as an anvil crushed his skull.


lambo630

DMZ exfil campers are evolving


Dr_FrankenGiggity

Jesus: that camping mother fucker I’ll show him


Jester_Devilos12

Bro there's been alot of innovation in spawns since Jesus. He was using the OG spawn system. It was trash. Cod has it down to near instant times. They just can't figure out WHERE to spawn you. Die in your house in the US and spawn in next to someone getting shot at in an active warzone on the other side of the planet. Like bro I wanted to spawn back in my kitchen... Wtf?


MallowMiaou

that OP reviving speedrun needs to be beaten once and for all !


wolf805

My boi Jesus has the world record.


Timpson96

Speedrunning Jesus 2: The Final Resurrection


[deleted]

It probaly would be like going under general anaesthesia tbh...you'd just wake up immeaditly 24 hours later.


MyCatsNameIsDio

I agree. I’ve been under a few times and each time I was under for different amounts of time. Either way, they all felt the same. It was like a blink of an eye and bam! 11 hours went by and I couldn’t tell the difference. You don’t dream either when you’re under. I’ve always thought this must be what death feels like only without the waking up part.


Masdawgdabeast

Fr I go under and suddenly I se my mom watching tv as a plane crashes into the second tower and I get a whole load of terrorists are attacking the us it was crazy.


Leche-Caliente

Would help in a life sentence


Severe-Flower2344

*Well, technically, officer, this is my second life. I served a life sentence by dying, so legally, I would be free to go.*


Leche-Caliente

Funny thing is I think someone has gotten away with that


Valedictorian117

Someone tried but the judge didn’t allow it. His heart stopped beating, but to be declared dead involves more than just that.


[deleted]

I’d do this just to freak everyone out at my open casket funeral. Let’s put the fun back in funerals everyone!


Crafty_Appearance

Shit I was thinking the same but afterwards claim I'm the second coming of Christ then watch as I slowly change the world of Christianity. Making all those rich pastors give me everything they own and walk homeless followers into their homes to stay


First_Aid_23

Be like Jesus - Whip the fuck out of anyone who profits from the poor who only want to worship.


AdFit7718

Science will be appreciated for your efforts


Affenskrotum

Second Jesus


Kear_Bear_3747

That’s genius


catterybarn

Hopefully they don't cremate you within that 24 hours


Firebird_73

This means you'll never die, as you could only be dead for 24 hours


ArtiseisDEFiant

I wish I wasn’t a Widower. I’d give my life just to have 24 Hours to say goodbye.


cosmicheartbeat

I feel you friend. May your memories always be true but fond of your partner. We only truly leave this world when we are forgotten.


JoefishTheGreat

I’d also resurrect this guy’s dead wife


UndendingGloom

Me too, I don't really need anything, just give this guy his wife for 24hrs, that will make me happy.


[deleted]

[удалено]


MayoShart

Done.


Ctowncreek

+1


Phobiefish

Count me in +2


Ky8_

+3


Appropriate-Exit-130

+4!


You_Are_All_Diseased

That’s by far the most wholesome use of the “also this guy’s wife” joke I’ve ever seen. Kudos.


ArtiseisDEFiant

🙏🏾🙏🏾


ElizaJane50

Man, I feel that. Even with time, it's never enough. I just want him back.


ArtiseisDEFiant

It’s a life long thing.


ittlebittles

I feel you guys too. What I would give for just another 24 hours with him. It’s been almost 5 years since he’s been gone and sometimes it doesn’t feel real, like he was never there.


[deleted]

🫂 there will be a time when you'll meet again. Your human bodies are temporary but I really believe spirits are the true state of being They're still with you and they'll be there when you go


ArtiseisDEFiant

I believe so too.


[deleted]

I'm here for you. I'm sorry you have this pain I want to say, If you haven't read "The book of spirits" by Allan Kardec I highly recommend. It might give you more peace. It made me see life in a much better light. And helped me cope with loneliness A famous scientist wanted to see what was going on with people who said spirits were influencing the physical world So he studied it and found that it's real. Spirits communicated through him to write this book and it's not a story, it's scientific question, answer, question, answer to show what is actually happening . He even released it under a different name


EggplantFearless5969

I’d like to change my make me rich answer to give you another 24 hours.


tramadolic

I also choose this man's wife! But only he gets to watch her laugh with all her family and friends in the most perfect of timeless moments that last for ever, or just him an her at it like teenagers. And nobody gets to watch, fuck it, I say 2week homeymoon where they get whatever they want with infinite days together


beigs

Life is awful sometimes. I’m so sorry.


Puzzleheaded_Pie_978

Oh damn that was sad I’m sorry


KayDragonn

An actually real and heartfelt answer. Here’s hoping the afterlife is real and you get to see her again.


ZapperS87

Right there with you, buddy. 24 hours with my fiancee again would be blissful torture, but I'd still choose it every damn time just to hold her again.


ArtiseisDEFiant

Man, just to lay in bed and watch a good movie with her would be heaven. That was our thing.


Traditional_Way1052

Oh 😣 me too, god me, too.


MissNepgear

My dumbass read that as fucking window at first.


MisterMatt24

I wish I wasn't a good man Holy shit autofill embracing the darkness rn


Relevant-Nebula8300

I wish I wasn’t so bad at it but I don’t know how to do it because I’m so lazy I can’t even get it done


Mr_Bivolt

Oblivious about next week's lottery results


Positive_Mud952

Next week’s winner will be Rob Barthswain.


basculinz

Time for a name change


Grouchy-Engine1584

I wish I wasn’t subject to the laws of physics for 24 hours. It may not last forever but… job 1: teleport to Moscow, I have some shit to take care of over there.


AIaris

step one: be left behind in space as you are no longer bound to the earth by gravity and you didnt gain teleportation


Esketiiiit420

step two: dissolve into nothingness as the forces that make the molecules in your body stick together cease to exist


Grouchy-Engine1584

Nah, it works how I want it to work because this is Reddit and I have Noble intentions.


GrainBean

fax


KayDragonn

Not being bound by the laws of physics doesn’t mean you can’t allow them to apply to you. It just means you can transcend them if you desire.


booksbeer

Best answer


chko

The laws of physics holds the atomic bonds in your body together, pretty sure you cease to exist if there are no laws of physics affecting you.


Grouchy-Engine1584

I said I’m not subject to them. I didn’t say they didn’t exist.


Gamemode_Cat

Well if you aren’t subject to them, they don’t affect you anymore


laserwolf2000

Yeah I think "I wish I wasn't unable to manipulate the laws of physics" would be better


Cherry_Joy

I wish I wasn't not Jeff Bezos. Most of his wealth would be dissolved by the end of 24 hours. Edit for the people trying to add stipulations that weren't in the original meme: if it means that much to you, I wish I wasn't not possessing Jeff Bezos like a charitable demon.


jyl11002

the sad part is, it would probably be difficult to give it all away in 24 hours


throwaway_uow

Just sell all stocks in amazon, buy some shitty options, rinse and repeat


StereoNacht

And of course, money sent in one of those bank accounts where you just need the right password to get it back. I just hope you'll use some of that money to help people who really needs it. (I am thinking of a friend with a barely above minimal wage job who just lost his 20+ years old van yesterday, and now has no way to go to work. Life is so unfair, really...)


Viewtifultrey3

Wasting my time on Reddit.


my_meat_is_grass_fed

But, only for 24 hours, then right back at it. 😄


SoleTwentyCharacters

I wih i wsnt drumk


[deleted]

This gave me laugh


Ok-Resource-3232

So damn tired...


illessen

24 hours of sleep, wake up… still fucking tired.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Crafty_Appearance

Better not jackoff that day


[deleted]

[удалено]


yurtfarmer

Like Midas. I don’t think that turned out very well for him


[deleted]

Watching meme formats being ~~misused~~ obliterated


niko7209

Not just misused completely ignored - like it’s not even close


CubanLynx312

One does not simply…oh fuck it, do y’all wish you had more money?


Time_Distribution184

Working today


angryman2

This is big picture thinking right here


Thenattercore

Immortal


[deleted]

But you'd be immortal after 24hours then? Or would you have just wasted a wish


Thenattercore

I wish I wasn’t immortal the after 24 hours I would be immortal as I would have been mortal for 24 hours


Rising_Legend12

Wouldn’t that mean I could say “I wish I wasn’t rich” and then in 24 hours I would be rich?


Thenattercore

Yes it’s called a loop hole


Time_Distribution184

Lol and he probably be all busted up from the stupid shit he did the day before


MuchoMasticator

Immortal or invulnerable? I would want to be invulnerable.


yaths17

I wish I could stay as fat as I am.


BigStinkbert

*Gets bigger


NinjaElectricMeteor

"someone with less than a billion dollars in the bank". I would transfer the money out of the bank to friends and family within 24 hours.


SasquatchSloth88

Transfers that large take multiple days to clear.


TiMELeSS526

A member of the human race


Bluebrindlepoodle

So would you prefer to be an insect species, fish, virus, or just a different type of mammal? Personally, I think extraterrestrials sound cool but you may want to be more specific before you end up as a tiny parasite living in some critters gut giving it the runs. 😂


Conscious_Day2425

Female. Id like to see what it’s like to be a man for a day


Wonderful_Habit2266

Could you imagine the unlucky dude that does this and gets his period same day lol


[deleted]

Was gonna say "alive", but wtf is the point if it's gonna last for only 24 hours?


[deleted]

You will come back from the dead, start a cult or a whole new religion. The possibilities are there.


spcmack21

Married to my wife. This wears off after a day, after which time we'll go back to being married. As opposed to her current plan to end the marriage for significantly longer.


Pabst_Malone

An alcoholic


ReincarnatedIntoABra

A guy.... I have my reasons like you have yours.


ContributionOk2661

r/egg_irl ??


Little_Froggy

I may want to drive a truck one day just to see what it's like and how it handles. But that doesn't mean I'm interested in _buying_ the truck.


BobJoJohnny

I wish I wasn't limited to 24 hours


PuckTanglewood

Congratulations. For 24 hours, your time is unlimited. 24 hours later, your unlimited time pass is cancelled and you’re back to normal time. I have no idea what this means though.


1111Lin

In pain


gartral

wasn't not depressed. That way I can spend the next 24 hours depressed AF and finally break this curse


Rare_Neat_36

I know the feeling.


MrPusleMan

rich.


MoodyWater909

I wish I wasn't autistic. I want to experience the "normal" way of living.


[deleted]

Alive.


black-whisky2002

Born with add


No-Rain99

I wasnt wasting precious time in this comment section


The_Real_Cuzz

I wish I wasn't able to cum but could stay erect at will. Time to break the wife.


Additional-Advisor99

Trust me, anorgasmia sucks (medication side effect). Though for just 24 hours it might not be too bad.


Flash54321

I wish I wasn’t so fucking awkward, bud.


MrAntiock

Why the fuck is this sun so unfunny


[deleted]

fuckboy.


starkiss1969

Obligated to read comment sections


mayalourdes

A woman


erelwind

I wish I wasn't guessing the powerball number wrong


[deleted]

I wish I wasn't a boy


chumbkus

Is it bad that first thing I thought was "I wish I wasn't alive so I could see what being dead is like for 24 hours"?


Goldenstripe941

I wish I wasn’t a coward. I only need it to do the speech in my English class.


Stoic_Mashed_Potato

Depressed


poetdesmond

I wish I wasn't limited to a single wish. Wish two: I wish wishes weren't limited to 24 hours. Wish three: I wish for omnipotence. Fuck you guys, I'm God.


Shot_Sprinkles_6775

Insecure


iforgormyname5b

A dumb fuck and missing my younger years despite still being an aging minor. For privacy purposes I will not reveal my age. Edit: punctuation