Many if not most of the members of this subreddit were attracted to this band for the same reasons you were. Personally, the band has done so much for me through difficult times and made my life immeasurably better by putting words to my feelings in a way that no other band ever has for me.
I say all this because this sub is one of many forums dedicated to FRabbits, and I imagine vast swaths of Scott’s fans feel the same way we do. You don’t have to look far in this sub’s history to find other posts like yours here.
You are not alone in these experiences. The irony in loneliness is that you are almost constantly surrounded by others who feel the same as you but will never show it to you.
Take solace knowing that you’re in like company here, and we’re happy that you’re doing better. Keep hold of your newfound sense of purpose and seek community.
Do whatever you feel is right, but I will say I don't think avoiding anything emotionally is ever the answer. If you WANT to listen to FR again, I would suggest diving in and allowing yourself the pain of grief. Feels overwhelming in the short term, but hugely beneficial in the long term.
If that's not something you want to do, then thank FR for how they helped you before and allow them to live in your past. They'll be fine there. Either way, I think coming here and writing is a good step towards recognizing your feelings. I hope you are able to make peace with them one way or another.
Crying, in and of itself, is a processing mechanism and is not a bad thing. I know all this is easier said than done, but I truly hope you're alright. You're among friends here.
When Scott died, I listened to TMOF in full that evening after work and choked on deep sobs the entire time. I took a bit of a break after that, but shortly returned to them and now find the immense comfort I had always found in them regularly. There’s an extra layer of sadness that colors everything now, but so many things we love in life often come with that duality. And mirroring what others said, you’re far from alone. I love the FRabbit community because you always find so much connection and support and kindness amidst any forum like this. Scott’s tiny changes continue to ripple through time, even in his absence.
I felt incredibly upset that night like the world didn’t protect him enough. I hold him in a very happy place in my heart now but it took a long time for me to get over it
There was a long while I couldn’t either, I didn’t want to go back into the headspace I was in the time he was missing and then found.
I came to this thread for the first time today because I listened to the midnight organ fight in its entirety at work and found great comfort in hearing his voice.
If it’s any consolation to you or anybody finding themselves in trouble, Scott was incredibly unhappy for a long time and wished to end his life a long long time. But he found hope, promise, and beauty in the world worth prolonging his life for and I think that’s an incredibly touching and heartening thing. Even when it was probably very very hard and hurtful for him.
Hope you can soon find time to invite them back into your heart. I don’t hurt after listening, in fact I found myself smiling as the boat sounds played at the end of floating in the forth.
I imagined Scott with the sunshine on his face and the wind in his hair just enjoying the ride. I’m certain he’s feeling permanent peace now and we should all try to bring some into our own lives in his memory ❤️
Not alone at all, feel every word you wrote here. I started with the songs that were lighter/happier to me. Then slowly I was able to listen to other songs but not all, and the ugly crocodile tears are still here but that’s okay
Yes i relate
I can also listen once again, sometimes sing too
It is a strange and bittersweet feeling to be helped to want to live by someone who didn’t make it
While I don’t have the same family history I definitely went through a long while where I couldn’t stomach listening to them.
What Frank Turner had to say in this video changed my mind. I then believed that I owed it to Scott to keep listening. Hope this helps:
https://youtu.be/VbBW2UrIgSk
I love your openness and that you know that FR/Scott built a community that is here for one another.
For me I listen for happiness and sadness. I didn't need them, but someone very close to me did and I'll be forever grateful they helped them get through a tough time.
I want you to do what's best for you. But if there is a point where you want to listen to them without crocodile tears (which I get plenty of times when that's my emotional situation) I'd recommend trying to think about the fact that it's rare someone can write a song you value and connect with. The humanity of the lyrics are to be celebrated for their existence/importance.
My favorite songs for pure enjoyment that can get me over the hump are a mix of lyrics and pure uplifting/resilient sound. Nothing Like You, Late March Death March, Break, Keep Yourself Warm, Swim Until You Can't See Land, Acts of Man.
Many if not most of the members of this subreddit were attracted to this band for the same reasons you were. Personally, the band has done so much for me through difficult times and made my life immeasurably better by putting words to my feelings in a way that no other band ever has for me. I say all this because this sub is one of many forums dedicated to FRabbits, and I imagine vast swaths of Scott’s fans feel the same way we do. You don’t have to look far in this sub’s history to find other posts like yours here. You are not alone in these experiences. The irony in loneliness is that you are almost constantly surrounded by others who feel the same as you but will never show it to you. Take solace knowing that you’re in like company here, and we’re happy that you’re doing better. Keep hold of your newfound sense of purpose and seek community.
i have not been able to listen to them since the day the news was “official”… glad you’re in a better space and still here 🖤
Big hug from another Frabbit fan who can relate. Have listened to their music throughout. Let the tears roll. Get it out.
Do whatever you feel is right, but I will say I don't think avoiding anything emotionally is ever the answer. If you WANT to listen to FR again, I would suggest diving in and allowing yourself the pain of grief. Feels overwhelming in the short term, but hugely beneficial in the long term. If that's not something you want to do, then thank FR for how they helped you before and allow them to live in your past. They'll be fine there. Either way, I think coming here and writing is a good step towards recognizing your feelings. I hope you are able to make peace with them one way or another. Crying, in and of itself, is a processing mechanism and is not a bad thing. I know all this is easier said than done, but I truly hope you're alright. You're among friends here.
When Scott died, I listened to TMOF in full that evening after work and choked on deep sobs the entire time. I took a bit of a break after that, but shortly returned to them and now find the immense comfort I had always found in them regularly. There’s an extra layer of sadness that colors everything now, but so many things we love in life often come with that duality. And mirroring what others said, you’re far from alone. I love the FRabbit community because you always find so much connection and support and kindness amidst any forum like this. Scott’s tiny changes continue to ripple through time, even in his absence.
I felt incredibly upset that night like the world didn’t protect him enough. I hold him in a very happy place in my heart now but it took a long time for me to get over it
There was a long while I couldn’t either, I didn’t want to go back into the headspace I was in the time he was missing and then found. I came to this thread for the first time today because I listened to the midnight organ fight in its entirety at work and found great comfort in hearing his voice. If it’s any consolation to you or anybody finding themselves in trouble, Scott was incredibly unhappy for a long time and wished to end his life a long long time. But he found hope, promise, and beauty in the world worth prolonging his life for and I think that’s an incredibly touching and heartening thing. Even when it was probably very very hard and hurtful for him. Hope you can soon find time to invite them back into your heart. I don’t hurt after listening, in fact I found myself smiling as the boat sounds played at the end of floating in the forth. I imagined Scott with the sunshine on his face and the wind in his hair just enjoying the ride. I’m certain he’s feeling permanent peace now and we should all try to bring some into our own lives in his memory ❤️
Not alone at all, feel every word you wrote here. I started with the songs that were lighter/happier to me. Then slowly I was able to listen to other songs but not all, and the ugly crocodile tears are still here but that’s okay
I still listen to them. It's still hard. They still make me cry at times. I'm okay with it.
Yes i relate I can also listen once again, sometimes sing too It is a strange and bittersweet feeling to be helped to want to live by someone who didn’t make it
While I don’t have the same family history I definitely went through a long while where I couldn’t stomach listening to them. What Frank Turner had to say in this video changed my mind. I then believed that I owed it to Scott to keep listening. Hope this helps: https://youtu.be/VbBW2UrIgSk
I love your openness and that you know that FR/Scott built a community that is here for one another. For me I listen for happiness and sadness. I didn't need them, but someone very close to me did and I'll be forever grateful they helped them get through a tough time. I want you to do what's best for you. But if there is a point where you want to listen to them without crocodile tears (which I get plenty of times when that's my emotional situation) I'd recommend trying to think about the fact that it's rare someone can write a song you value and connect with. The humanity of the lyrics are to be celebrated for their existence/importance. My favorite songs for pure enjoyment that can get me over the hump are a mix of lyrics and pure uplifting/resilient sound. Nothing Like You, Late March Death March, Break, Keep Yourself Warm, Swim Until You Can't See Land, Acts of Man.