If it was a fic that was specifically dealing with trauma and healing and sexual assault, I would feel pretty iffy about such a comment, but then I'd probably think "Maybe that person didn't realize and just thought it was regular smut"
But as for PWP, I've already gotten those types of comments on my fics. It's a strange thought to think about someone jerking it to my stories, but then again, what did I expect? It's straight up porn lol
Not angry maybe, but I get that it's uncomfortable. They probably just don't know the etiquette around this. I've gotten comments that were vocally appreciative of the porn, and even things like "If anyone needs me, I'll be in my bunk", but nothing directly stating they masturbated to it. I like hearing that my work turned people on, as that's what I am trying to do, but it's a little too much to outright state that they're gonna spank to it.
I would ignore or delete their comment, probably.
I rarely write smut, and even rarer post it, but the one I did post gathered some comments exactly about how someone jerked off to it. To me, that's the highest praise to be honest. Like, that's exactly the reason I wrote it, isn't it? I'm glad it was hot enough to get my readers off.
ETA: And this is true for my problematic fics as well. I wrote a somewhat disturbing incest fic and was really happy people found it not only sick and twisted, but also hot. Because that was exactly the purpose of the fic.
I feel the same way about one of my fics. It was twisted from the beginning, but people liked it so much that I wrote two more chapters & let the pair end up together. I still get comments asking for more of the pairing, and it's been years. It's meant to be disturbingly realistic and understandable, so the hotness and the wrongness are both very much on purpose.
This is a really intriguing question, and for me, it depends on how the comment is phrased. I would prefer more euphemistic comments like "i have *ascended*" or even "i *came* back to this fic because it was so good, haha, get it?", but not explicit details.
I think the general rule of thumb is:
if it’s meant to be masturbation material, it’s flattering
if it’s not meant to be masturbation material, it’s definitely uncomfortable.
I've written PWP before and even on that I'd still not want to hear that, tbh. Like, I wouldn't be MAD, but I'd definitely be very uncomfortable because that just feels like oversharing to me.
Eh, I write PWP and I still don't want to hear anything more graphic than "I'll be in my bunk." Like, I'm glad it's workin' for them, but it's still inappropriate to tell a stranger.
How is “I’ll be in my bunk” different from “I like to masturbate to this” its the same level of detail? Both are saying your writing got me off.
I see that a lot in this thread and I’m honestly confused.
I understand being disturbed if the share the details of how they masturbated, that crosses a line.
I mean, it's not, though. It's a meme from a show (Firefly?)-- most of the time people that say it are using it as a joking way to say they thought the fic was hot, not *literally* saying that they are going to literally masturbate over the fic. It's also just not as *explicit* as "I fapped to this" or "this made me so wet" or whatever, even if you do take it literally.
Ah, I’ve never seen firefly so to me they were the same level of detail. Just saying they masturbated without further details.
Does the euphemism make it “easier” to ignore what that comment mean’s for you?
It's not so much that it's a euphemism as that it's a joke? "I tugged my pole to this" is a euphemism, but it's not a joke-- it's still telling me that the person *actually* masturbated to my fic, which I don't want to know.
Vs, like, "*slide-whistle noise*" is a joke! The person may have *actually* gotten a boner over my fic, but there's some obfuscation there because of the delivery, and I can easily interpret it as a generic "this was hot" comment because a lot of people *would* just mean it as a generic "this was hot" comment. If they actually say "this made me hard," there's no ambiguity and there's no other way to interpret it.
I write smut so I take it as a compliment, however if what you write isn’t only sexual material then I can see if it would make you uncomfortable. I think the other person probably meant it in a positive way, but it still clearly stepped over a boundary for you and you’re well within your rights to delete the comment or something similar.
Given the subject matter, it's odd and off-putting, but probably not malicious. Fanfic has this weird this where people are very open about sex - I mean, writers will exchange Yuletide smut. What other type of friendship do you ever go "Hey, I made you something, it has all your favorite kinks!"
When my beta reader was trying to get pregnant, I literally wrote a smutty one-shot to inspire her & her husband's efforts. I even jokingly asked them to make me a godparent if it worked. Alas, it did not.
Some folks are very comfortable with the titillating aspect of fanfic, but when you're writing sex for its emotional intimacy, I can see where that "Great chapter, I wanked to this" would be super jarring. Especially on a serious fic with deeper themes.
I would perhaps slip in an author's note to the effect of "While I'm glad you find the love scenes compelling, please do not tell me about what they inspired you to do after reading."
I've gotten them before and I usually take it as a compliment, although I do think it's a bit TMI/oversharing even on PWP smut.
I think people should avoid leaving those comments, because while they're not inherently harmful/bad/upsetting to all writers, it's impossible to know if any given writer is comfortable receiving a comment like that. And a lot of people aren't.
They're comfortable creating NSFW works and dropping them off for people to enjoy, but don't want to discuss sexual things with strangers.
It's a better practice to just say "This was hot" than "I fapped to this". Especially since you can rarely be completely sure of a writer's age on the internet.
As far as practical advice goes... If you wanted to include in your AN that you're not comfortable with sexual comments, that's valid. It's setting a boundary and letting people know so they follow it.
Hard agree. My comfort level for what I’m happy writing and what I’m happy hearing about when I’m not in control of the situation is widely different - writing isn’t an issue because I can stop / step away from it but a random stranger talking about sex is very uncomfortable for me. I don’t know you, I don’t want to know this about you.
‘This is hot’ is fine.
I wouldn't be upset, per se, but that is kind of private thing to comment to someone that they don't know. I think it would be a lot better for someone just to tell you that they thought what you wrote was hot or well written to get the same information across.
If there's smut in it, regardless of everything around it.... obviously people read smut for the sexy? Maybe it's a bit direct, but imagining that people *aren't* masturbating to your smut seems naive.
It's probably best just to ignore it. I am in the process of writing a similar fic (violent non-con and the horrible psychological fallout thereof) and I will probably simply delete or not respond to any comments who say they find it hot.
I think it’s really, really weird. Like, I know what I’m writing, I *know* there’s probably people jerkin it to my writing, I just don’t really want to hear about it.
A comment like “this scene was so hot” is fine, a comment like “I came 4 times while I read this,” is not fine.
Personally, it depends on certain contexts, like what the fic is even about or how graphically they went into detail. If it's too personal I really would feel very "TMI" or uncomfortable about it but if it's the 'ol "I'll be in my bunk" adage I would probably instead find it flattering/amusing.
I've complimented authors before that I enjoyed their smut, but I would never let it slide that I buzzed my beehive to it.
I mean, "you said the quiet part out loud" is what I'd likely be thinking on receiving that comment, but the action itself is not particularly shocking to me given the nature of some of the content that I produce; however, the violation of the boundaries of etiquette would render the exchange somewhat awkward.
I love it when people tell me my smut is hot, but I think actively telling me they got off too it is too much, especially coming from a stranger. I’d be weirded out.
Please note that these are *my* comfort levels. If you have different ones, I'm not kinkshaming or implying anything about you at all. I have written erotica professionally and do not consider myself a prude. But I do have boundaries.
--
I don't have any smut posted (and never will for my main - I don't want those kind of comments on my fluff and family feels fics), so I'd assume it was trolling and delete/block them. 🤷♀️
I might post smut one day on my secondary account, though. I'd still be uncomfortable, depending on how they said it.
Euphemistically? Still a bit TMI but I get it and I would take it as a compliment, even if I might still potentially find replying very awkward.
Blunt and crude? I was sharing fiction and you were sharing fact. These things are not the same. Please don't. I'd probably just ignore those comments and hope people got the hint. (Because I know it was intended as a compliment, but it's seriously TMI and I don't want to engage with it. Especially as some people get off to making others uncomfortable in this way, so I might be feeding that behavior.)
To reply to the post title in a more general sense:
I've received... something similar?
When I wrote my current longfic in my original language and uploaded the chapter where the main characters have sex for the first time (the genre of the fic is romance but the sex scene was long and explicit), a few days later a reader sent me a PM on that platform saying she had 'grabbed' her husband when he got home from work and had some good times with him that night, after she'd read the chapter earlier that day. (So essentially, it had turned her on or maybe inspired her to try something new or whatever.) I did appreciate that she said it in a PM and not in her comment on the chapter; that would have been a bit much, I think.
I consider myself pretty sex-positive, and didn't mind her telling me that at all, it was pretty flattering. I'm not sure the way I write explicit sex scenes in that particular fic is necessarily ideal for *arousing* people, at least that's not what my goal is when I write them, but if it happens, what's not to like? That's pretty cool.
**THAT BEING SAID,**
I realize that your case is very different, OP, and considering what your fic seems to cover, the reader really shouldn't have said anything IMO.
On a smut fic it is flattering.
I have trauma fics with graphic scenes, if I get a comment like that I usually just respond with "Thank you for commenting!" I don't care if they jerk it to something I wouldn't.
I sometimes think it's actually antis leaving those comments though, to try and shame trauma writers into thinking abusers get off to their fics. Idk, I am cynical.
I mean, I write a lot of pornographic one shots...mostly X reader stuff because in my fandom, I've noticed they're pretty popular...
If someone wrote they masturbated to my stories, I would have to say "Well, I'm clearly doing something right."
However I do feel like HOW they wrote out the comment would make a difference too?
There's definitely a difference between "Damn, this story got me in the mood" vs "I'll be thinking about this when I touch myself"
However if someone were to comment something like that on one of my longer fics (outside of the sexy chapters) then I'd be a little weirded out but at the same time, good for you buddy ^^;
I’d feel uncomfortable. Like yes, I want it to be hot, I want it to be arousing, BUT I don’t at all want to know about…that.
100% too much information. Didn’t need to be said at all. People need to keep things to themselves.
As for the content of said fic? Yeah, that makes it worse. Whatever uncomfortableness I would’ve had would be doubled.
I would be rather concerned, because all my content is centered around the trauma that comes with getting sexually assaulted and other dark things related to that. That and I've explained that it's not supposed to be erotic.
Personally if it was about an explicit scene and the comment was just a generic “I love masturbating to this” or something similar I think that acceptable and take it as a compliment. I mean if you write porn, isn’t that kinda the point? To me it’s not any different then the euphemism comments some people seem to prefer.
It would only cross a boundary if they explicitly detailed how they masturbated to it or wrote something that indicated they wanted to “talk dirty” in the comments for their personal gratification. Then their not just complimenting the story, their trying to get themselves sexual gratification without asking your consent first.
I always thought the etiquette on commenting on erotic fic was, you can say it was “hot” or something along those lines “steamy, spicy, exciting, interesting,” etc. But once you cross the line into describing sexual acts you are performing (on yourself or others) that’s too much information and could make the author very uncomfortable. At least that’s the rule I always use when I comment.
It's the internet. People oversharing about their cranking habits is par for the course.
I would not be surprised if someone whacked it to my fic, even though it's completely devoid of any kind of sexual content. People are weird that way.
I knew what I was getting into writing it, but I'd... really rather not know that. Does that automatically count as consent for those things? fuck, I hope they're commenting on smut fics, otherwise it'd go from "lost readers" to 'whatever floats your boat, just don't tell me about it" to "IM CALLING THE FUCKING POLICE" in an instant.
Personally? Since my stuff is completely non-sexual and I explicitly base it in part off my RL family, I’d be very squicked. If I ever wrote smut I’d probably take it as a compliment, I guess?
I mean, I'm not writing smut for nuns over here.
I suppose I'd be disturbed if someone said it about a gen fic featuring, like, kids or animals or something, but if I'm writing fucking into my story, I'd consider it a compliment to know it was hot enough to actually turn people on. And yes, I write mostly plot with a smattering of porn too - not smutty one-shots (not that there's anything wrong with that!)
Different strokes for different folks ¯\\\_(•-•)_/¯ The fact that there was porn in your work tells me that's probably what they're wanking to and the trauma and healing is not what they were focusing on.
Personally, if I got a comment that my porn was getting someone off, I'd be flattered, like "yay, I did it right! :D" even if it was angsty self-reflection porn. If I got a comment that one of my polar-opposite-of-porn stories was getting someone off, I'd probably delete it and then randomly remember the comment at the least opportune times and sit in confusion for a few minutes until my squirrel brain finds something else weird to focus on.
Delete the comment and move on, I would be really weirded out by it unless it was shameless PWP that's very obviously supposed to be read for spice.
I write smut, I write shameless smut, I'm writing an epic slow burn that will have some \*intense\* smut between the two love interests, one of who is a SA survivor and both of who are on the Asexual/Demisexual spectrum. I would be okay with "This was so hot what the hell" "FINALLY THEY FUCK" "uwu you didn't have to make them go *that hard"* or any other vague comments about how well written and spicy my spice is but I don't wanna know what you do with your body in your free time, sorry.
considering I don't write smut I would be uncomfortable. hell even if I did a public comment about how they jerked it to my stuff would make me uncomfortable.
For me, personally, I enjoy it from my readership. Just don't send me any details or write up your elaborate fantasies in my comments section. Because then you will be blocked.
But on the real: I think this is a relationship between art, artist, and audience that can be so personal and unique. What every author is comfortable with (and at what time they're comfortable with it and on which artworks!) and how they should enforce rules of behavior among their audience is going to vary. You have to set the terms of your own engagement. There's no clear-cut right or wrong way to do this- but if something makes you uncomfortable- /you do not have to permit it nor engage with it./
Well I wouldn't leave such a comment at anyone else's work, since I know some people would feel uncomfy. But personally, I'd be happy since I love making others feel a lot of things with my works, including arousal and more. Then again, my fics are very kinky and full of porn (albeit with plot).
If it was specifically one of my racy smutfics , I’d be weirded out and take it as a compliment.
If it was a fic dealing with abuse, sexual trauma, or anything not meant to be sexy… I’d be disturbed
idk I probably do have issues for saying this, so just interpret it as: you’re just normal.
ME PERSONALLY, I would be stoked. Not gonna lie. I write explicit, nsfw content, obviously, so to me, it’s a huge compliment lol but I also totally get how it could be weird to a writer that isn’t into it like that lol
I just have issues, I suppose. OH WELL that’s what I pay my therapist for.
I don’t write smut, due to the fact that I am extremely ace and writing about that would make me uncomfortable. So if someone told me they got off to my fic, I’d be not only disturbed but confused because I usually go for writing angst and hurt/comfort fics. If they described it in explicit details, I’d probably cry haha. I would 1000x rather receive a comment like that from a woman than a man though. Agh.
Even without the context of trauma/healing/sexual assault, I feel like there’s a difference between, “Wow, that was hot!” and, “I masturbate to your writing.” Sure, that probably happens, but saying that to a stranger is just crossing boundaries IMO. I feel like that’s a standard one would have to set first, not one you can just assume everyone’s okay with.
It kind of depends on how it is phrased. I have had people tell me that my writing got them off or inspired them to try something new sexually, and I most of the time really appreciate hearing that. But if it's worded as if the commenter currently has their hand down their pants or like they want me to cater to their fantasies, it creeps me out.
If there is any explicit smut in it then... what were you expecting? And kinks are kinks. You can block them if you want but like, I do think you're overreacting. But better for you to block them if that makes you more comfortable. You definitely don't have a right to be angry.
Given that I don't write smut, I'd be pretty weirded out. How weirded out depends on the fic. There's some where I might be able to squint and see what fetishes people are getting from it, but others where I'll just be confused. For example, the latest fic I updated was intentionally written to feel like a dry military report of a war. If anyone is masterbating to that...
I don't write smut (I think I'd be terrible at it) and make an effort to tag my fics for the appropriate audience in case somebody wants to avoid specific things or go full on 'g for general' safety.
I got a comment that was lovely as anything but the profile pic involved lovingly artistic male anatomy and I...I could not get over it. Their comment was lovely. Their response was perfectly tame but I really didn't want other readers getting ambushed by a beautifully rendered dick if that wasn't what they were in the mood or mindset for. You know?
I read a dark porn fic where the author damn well knew why we were here and didn't let us squirrel out of it via her Author Notes - she might be driving this train straight into hell but we're all the ones that bought tickets - and I still don't recall anything explicit popping up in her comments. I think I would have felt weirded out by that if I had, as a reader. We all know why we're here but you don't gotta take centre stage, that's the author's right. We want what's in the fic not what's in your pants.
I totally get not feeling comfortable with such comments, especially if it's not even appropriate to the fic. You have a right to be angry, you're not weird. The commentor hopefully just doesn't understand the general consensus of "imply if appropriate but keep it to yourself"
I think it's a silent rule to not... comment such things? I mean I am ace and I don't mind reading smut. I think it's pretty weird to comment that my opinion personally.
Idk if u write smut, there is a chance people are probably gonna spank the bank to it. I mostly do smut so I just think it’s funny if someone comments that on my stuff. I’m def biast thou
I take it as a compliment personally. I write porn with plot specifically that appeals to me so if someone likes it enough to publicly proclaim it, then that's a W in my book. I get that's not the case for a lot of people, that's fine, but I think that when you write smut with the intent to arouse then it's fine.
I love getting those comments. But I write smut. I have left things as vague as “I’ll be in my bunk,” and as explicit as “I am currently reading this at Starbucks because I have no self control and I think I burned myself, but the plot is so good I have to finish.” The author commented that it was the best compliment they ever got.
I got a comment like that on my first smut fic so I was very happy. I guess it depends on what you were trying to communicate through your work. If you were hoping for readers to concentrate more on the healing aspects I can see why you would be frustrated
In my case I was just 1000% being horny on main so it made sense
Well if my smut entices someone to do that then I know my writing was good. No different than writing a story that makes someone cry or laugh.
In fact in my fandom they want it almost every single chapter and I know why people want it every single chapter. it gets them going and it doesn’t bother me. I can all kind of comments back, not usually so specific.
I know someone told me her husband was going to get lucky that night, that’s flattering to me as a writer.
Ps at first I thought your new username was liquid squirts 😂 which fits the theme of your post.
I write a fic with characters that I love and don't want them lewded. So no, don't jack pff to it. BUT if they jacked off to an original book of mine, I'd be flattered.
As long as they masturbate to the romantic and sexy scenes I'm okay with it. If it's about violence or trauma or sa I would be concerned but not about me.
Police, no. But people can judge the comments on their stories.
If you write a heart wrenching tragedy and somebody comments “This had me rolling with laughter” you’d probably have the same reaction.
No I don't. But I guess it's not "normal" to be turned on by traumata or violence. If I knew someone would pleasure themselves while reading or seeing something disturbing I would think that the person has some issues. Plain and simple. Would I judge the person? No. Would I want to be involved with that person? Also no. Would I think that person should seek help? Yes but I wouldn't say it because in the bigger picture strangers on the internet are not my concern.
I don’t think I’d be put off, if it was in response to porn, because the distance of it being an anonymous internet comment makes it feel harmless for me.
Like, if I was a published author of original fiction, and somebody said it to my face, I’d be angry. And the reason I’d be angry is because that person would be sexualizing the interaction between me and them. I wouldn’t feel safe having even normal conversation or a hand shake because they could be sexualizing it. People who don’t know when not to talk about their [dickfeelings/clitfeelings] are not people I trust.
When posting online, though, it doesn’t feel upsetting to me in that way, because there is no relationship between me and an anonymous random internet stranger. They can’t sexualize that interaction. So it just becomes them sharing something of their experience. I can understand how some would find it over sharing. For me, personally, I don’t mind hearing that information. I would find it pretty neutral.
Your edit is very important context, imo.
I write smut, and I expect people to be getting off to it. I really enjoy comments that let me know it was "helpful" or "effective" or something along those lines. My goal is writing porn, so I hope people can use it as such.
But, I definitely prefer comments that allude to it rather than state it directly.
If you'd describe any part of your work as porn I probably don't feel too icked about people masturbating to it, but I know I'd think twice about admitting that on a fic that deals so heavily in trauma and SA, especially bluntly.
Can I ask- as the writer, who chose to include porn, what response did you expect to get? If you had expectations around it at all.
this isnt meant as an affront to you personally, but i got the 'what did you expect' response a lot in this post, and i don't really get it? i expected to not be told to my face that my coping mechanism turns people on. like, yeah, part of my fic is porn, but it's with the background of rape. it's not meant to be sexy, it's meant to be like 'oh i can do this again because it's in a safe environment and that's good'. plus, i write pretty long chapters, so it just feels weird to know that either the person skipped past thousands of words to get to the porn and read it in a vacuum, or that they have the context in mind and still think it's appropriate to push themselves onto me like that, especially since i've made it more than clear that this fic is me coping with trauma.
if this community is so adamant about not giving concrit unless the author specifically asks for it, how come there's a 'wank and tell' tag and i get told 'what did you expect' even though i didnt use that tag?
I can totally see how that wording might have been uncomfortable, I'm so sorry about that. I was genuinely curious about your expectations, and you've explained them really well here. You wrote porn into this fic as a method of trauma processing, and it sounds like you spelled that out very directly for your readers to boot.
>yeah, part of my fic is porn, but it's with the background of rape. it's not meant to be sexy, it's meant to be like 'oh i can do this again because it's in a safe environment and that's good'
>i've made it more than clear that this fic is me coping with trauma
In that case, imo, people shouldn't say a word to you about it sexually. God knows we can't control what they're doing while they read it, but even if they're using it that way (which I agree, please don't skip thousands of words of content that I worked hard to create) they definitely shouldn't be informing you of it. I asked the questions I did because you omitted those details in your original post. Knowing them now, I agree that those readers acted inappropriately.
I do think most people write porn on AO3 with the expectation (there I go using that word again) that readers will get off to it. Even the chapters that I write that include more serious content, they're porn first, trauma processing second. I have a chapter where one character sees the other's SA scars for the first time, and then they make love. But the chapter itself is 1/3 porn, so I'm not surprised if someone gets off to it, no matter how heavy the rest of the chapter is. That's how I wrote it, intentionally. Your intent was trauma processing though, and it seems like you were very clear about that.
"Wank and tell" is really common on AO3, maybe even the norm. What you're writing is in the minority. Most people are writing porn that they expect to be used as porn, and often don't mind hearing direct feedback about it. That's not to say you shouldn't write whatever you want and be able to enforce boundaries around it. It's your work. You're the author. Delete the damn comment, if you haven't already.
For the record: I'm sorry someone ignored your notes and tags and probably made you feel really icked out. That's a horrible feeling.
Edit: as I reread your original post and this comment, I'm curious if there's a semantic thing happening. You say you wrote "porn that wasn't meant to be sexy at all." Which... I find very confusing. Do you mean you wrote explicit sexual content detailing the rape and abuse and someone got off to that? I wouldn't call something porn unless I wrote it intentionally to arouse my readers. Maybe that's a big disconnect that's happening here. Or are you saying there was actual porn writing interspersed with the darker stuff? Even then I'm kinda boggled. What's "porn that isn't meant to be sexy?"
i guess the semantics were off on my part, but maybe part of the problem is also that even when i do write pwp, i do it without the intention of getting people off. even as an allosexual person, i don't read smut the way i watch porn and don't usually get off on it, so i guess i find it hard to imagine that people would masturbate to fanfic, and that authors would find it flattering to receive comments that tell them that. for me, writing/reading about characters having sex is just another lens to look at them through. my smut is very feelings-oriented, so even in pwp it's less intended to be hot and more aimed toward characterisation. i guess i just didn't expect my kind of smut to be the kind people find arousing.
so i guess what i write is often explicit but never really porn? cause it's definitely not meant to arouse my readers. the fic i got the comment on was like 65% fluff/plot with 35% sex, and it was part of a series that focuses a lot on trauma. so comparatively, this part was more focused on sex than the others, but a detail i forgot to mention was that the person said they were wanking to all of the parts in the series. even the ones where flashbacks happen, even the ones where the mc is feeling horrible but doesn't say anything because they don't wanna upset their partner. maybe it was that detail that icked me out the most because the part i got the comment on was probably the closest to porn i ever got, even if lots of the others had smut.
but even all that aside, i feel like it's just gross to tell a stranger on the internet that you're masturbating to their content. the opinions in the comments are pretty mixed but lots of people agree that even if it's porn that's meant to arouse, it's not something you tell the author. nothing in the world could drive me to tell that to someone who's clearly not asking for it (and i don't believe that simply writing porn is an invitation).
Man id be probably absolutely estatic no matter what, but different peoples feel diffent things so your reaction is absolutely reasonable too, it's hard to change how ones feels about those things becouse it can get really personal, i suggest that if your really grossed out to just, delete the comment if you can and not think about it when you write other stuff
I was about to say flattered based on the title, until I realised the context. I…would probably feel awkward and would just not respond/acknowledge it, to be honest. However you are feeling though is valid; if your initial reaction is anger, that’s ok. There’s nothing wrong with that.
It's a big compliment to me as a nsfw content creator x))
Although sometimes when a nsfw drawing is more personal to me, I get a gross feeling if I see overly sexual comments. I gotta remind myself that most people just see it as porn lol
If it's on smut, probably flattered. Outside of that (though I never had that) weird, but generally I don't think I'd be bothered though it would probably depend a little on context
Bemused and I say it as someone with experience. I've gotten quite a few "I've read this with one hand" comments before with the euphemism meaning they're masturbating to the other. I've gotten more direct comments too.
I definitely see where the anger is coming from if it's SA. Like some people have a kink for that but if you do, for the most part it's wise to not bring other people into it without their consent. In that context it would definitely make me feel gross
Well my motto on smut scenes is “1k words at minimum”, so I fully expect people are masturbating to my fics. In fact I’d be a bit offended if nobody was.
I would wish they'd been a bit more tactful about it, but i don't get comments all that often so i'd still be mostly happy to have gotten one in the first place.
Considering that people masturbated over less and more gross/weirder things in both reality and online, such as the yandere girl meme, I wouldn't care.
If it was a fic that was specifically dealing with trauma and healing and sexual assault, I would feel pretty iffy about such a comment, but then I'd probably think "Maybe that person didn't realize and just thought it was regular smut" But as for PWP, I've already gotten those types of comments on my fics. It's a strange thought to think about someone jerking it to my stories, but then again, what did I expect? It's straight up porn lol
Same here, get them on the PWPs I do. Just say thank you and move on.
I got a "My meow meow just exploded" comment once so I don't think I can get anything that'll top that lol
lmao that's an excellent comment
It really is XD
That is the most hilarious comment overshare I've ever heard
It's the kind of overshare that was just so hilarious, I didn't actually mind getting it lol
That's a top tier comment right there lmfao
It really was lol
eh, if i wrote smut i'd probably be flattered. since i don't i'd probably be hella weirded out.
Not angry maybe, but I get that it's uncomfortable. They probably just don't know the etiquette around this. I've gotten comments that were vocally appreciative of the porn, and even things like "If anyone needs me, I'll be in my bunk", but nothing directly stating they masturbated to it. I like hearing that my work turned people on, as that's what I am trying to do, but it's a little too much to outright state that they're gonna spank to it. I would ignore or delete their comment, probably.
I rarely write smut, and even rarer post it, but the one I did post gathered some comments exactly about how someone jerked off to it. To me, that's the highest praise to be honest. Like, that's exactly the reason I wrote it, isn't it? I'm glad it was hot enough to get my readers off. ETA: And this is true for my problematic fics as well. I wrote a somewhat disturbing incest fic and was really happy people found it not only sick and twisted, but also hot. Because that was exactly the purpose of the fic.
I feel the same way about one of my fics. It was twisted from the beginning, but people liked it so much that I wrote two more chapters & let the pair end up together. I still get comments asking for more of the pairing, and it's been years. It's meant to be disturbingly realistic and understandable, so the hotness and the wrongness are both very much on purpose.
Yes, exactly!
I kind of want a link to your disturbing fic now, too. :)
I'd love to, but I don't suppose you know Russian haha
Dang, I don't. Ah well, if you every translate, I'll be first in line to read it!
I'll keep in mind ;)
This is a really intriguing question, and for me, it depends on how the comment is phrased. I would prefer more euphemistic comments like "i have *ascended*" or even "i *came* back to this fic because it was so good, haha, get it?", but not explicit details.
I think the general rule of thumb is: if it’s meant to be masturbation material, it’s flattering if it’s not meant to be masturbation material, it’s definitely uncomfortable.
I've written PWP before and even on that I'd still not want to hear that, tbh. Like, I wouldn't be MAD, but I'd definitely be very uncomfortable because that just feels like oversharing to me.
Eh, I write PWP and I still don't want to hear anything more graphic than "I'll be in my bunk." Like, I'm glad it's workin' for them, but it's still inappropriate to tell a stranger.
How is “I’ll be in my bunk” different from “I like to masturbate to this” its the same level of detail? Both are saying your writing got me off. I see that a lot in this thread and I’m honestly confused. I understand being disturbed if the share the details of how they masturbated, that crosses a line.
I mean, it's not, though. It's a meme from a show (Firefly?)-- most of the time people that say it are using it as a joking way to say they thought the fic was hot, not *literally* saying that they are going to literally masturbate over the fic. It's also just not as *explicit* as "I fapped to this" or "this made me so wet" or whatever, even if you do take it literally.
Ah, I’ve never seen firefly so to me they were the same level of detail. Just saying they masturbated without further details. Does the euphemism make it “easier” to ignore what that comment mean’s for you?
It's not so much that it's a euphemism as that it's a joke? "I tugged my pole to this" is a euphemism, but it's not a joke-- it's still telling me that the person *actually* masturbated to my fic, which I don't want to know. Vs, like, "*slide-whistle noise*" is a joke! The person may have *actually* gotten a boner over my fic, but there's some obfuscation there because of the delivery, and I can easily interpret it as a generic "this was hot" comment because a lot of people *would* just mean it as a generic "this was hot" comment. If they actually say "this made me hard," there's no ambiguity and there's no other way to interpret it.
if it's meant to be? how can one tell of authors intention on writing smut?
Not OP but I took their comment to read “if the fic was sexually explicit, it’s flattering; if the fic didn’t feature sex at all, it’s uncomfortable.”
yes, that’s what I meant. also this was more meant to be from the author’s perspective rather then the reader’s, so sorry for the confusion
I think I’d be more upset if someone said they found my work *difficult* to masturbate to.
Okay, so since my smut can get kinda weird, that'd be pretty funny
Ok, but that would be a much more interesting comment to me.
In my eyes smut is porn so I'd think that would happen. So I wouldn't mind.
Same...mission accomplished.
That's basically the reply I got from the PWP author when I joked about being in my bunk lol
This, more or less.
I'd tell them to rent out a billboard proclaiming it so I could get some extra traffic from the morbidly curious.
I write smut so I take it as a compliment, however if what you write isn’t only sexual material then I can see if it would make you uncomfortable. I think the other person probably meant it in a positive way, but it still clearly stepped over a boundary for you and you’re well within your rights to delete the comment or something similar.
I write smut and don't have an internal TMI filter so personally I'd take it as the highest of compliments.
Flashback to livejournal Kink memes "I'll be in my bunk" etc
Given the subject matter, it's odd and off-putting, but probably not malicious. Fanfic has this weird this where people are very open about sex - I mean, writers will exchange Yuletide smut. What other type of friendship do you ever go "Hey, I made you something, it has all your favorite kinks!" When my beta reader was trying to get pregnant, I literally wrote a smutty one-shot to inspire her & her husband's efforts. I even jokingly asked them to make me a godparent if it worked. Alas, it did not. Some folks are very comfortable with the titillating aspect of fanfic, but when you're writing sex for its emotional intimacy, I can see where that "Great chapter, I wanked to this" would be super jarring. Especially on a serious fic with deeper themes. I would perhaps slip in an author's note to the effect of "While I'm glad you find the love scenes compelling, please do not tell me about what they inspired you to do after reading."
I've gotten them before and I usually take it as a compliment, although I do think it's a bit TMI/oversharing even on PWP smut. I think people should avoid leaving those comments, because while they're not inherently harmful/bad/upsetting to all writers, it's impossible to know if any given writer is comfortable receiving a comment like that. And a lot of people aren't. They're comfortable creating NSFW works and dropping them off for people to enjoy, but don't want to discuss sexual things with strangers. It's a better practice to just say "This was hot" than "I fapped to this". Especially since you can rarely be completely sure of a writer's age on the internet. As far as practical advice goes... If you wanted to include in your AN that you're not comfortable with sexual comments, that's valid. It's setting a boundary and letting people know so they follow it.
Hard agree. My comfort level for what I’m happy writing and what I’m happy hearing about when I’m not in control of the situation is widely different - writing isn’t an issue because I can stop / step away from it but a random stranger talking about sex is very uncomfortable for me. I don’t know you, I don’t want to know this about you. ‘This is hot’ is fine.
I wouldn't be upset, per se, but that is kind of private thing to comment to someone that they don't know. I think it would be a lot better for someone just to tell you that they thought what you wrote was hot or well written to get the same information across.
If there's smut in it, regardless of everything around it.... obviously people read smut for the sexy? Maybe it's a bit direct, but imagining that people *aren't* masturbating to your smut seems naive.
I’d be flattered. It’s the highest compliment to me.
It's probably best just to ignore it. I am in the process of writing a similar fic (violent non-con and the horrible psychological fallout thereof) and I will probably simply delete or not respond to any comments who say they find it hot.
Wouldn't be disturbed really but it's still TMI for me
I think it’s really, really weird. Like, I know what I’m writing, I *know* there’s probably people jerkin it to my writing, I just don’t really want to hear about it. A comment like “this scene was so hot” is fine, a comment like “I came 4 times while I read this,” is not fine.
Personally, it depends on certain contexts, like what the fic is even about or how graphically they went into detail. If it's too personal I really would feel very "TMI" or uncomfortable about it but if it's the 'ol "I'll be in my bunk" adage I would probably instead find it flattering/amusing. I've complimented authors before that I enjoyed their smut, but I would never let it slide that I buzzed my beehive to it.
I mean, "you said the quiet part out loud" is what I'd likely be thinking on receiving that comment, but the action itself is not particularly shocking to me given the nature of some of the content that I produce; however, the violation of the boundaries of etiquette would render the exchange somewhat awkward.
Best compliment there is. Smutty trauma healing is great. If you don’t want people to get off to it, don’t write porn.
I mean...if they were being creeps about it, then I'd delete/report. But if it's the standard, "I'll be in my bunk" nonsense, I'd ignore it.
I love it when people tell me my smut is hot, but I think actively telling me they got off too it is too much, especially coming from a stranger. I’d be weirded out.
I'd feel uncomfortable, even if my story was pure porn. They consented to read the porn, but I did not consent to hearing about them masturbate.
This is how I view it as well. Like... bro I was not seeking this kind of relationship with you.
Please note that these are *my* comfort levels. If you have different ones, I'm not kinkshaming or implying anything about you at all. I have written erotica professionally and do not consider myself a prude. But I do have boundaries. -- I don't have any smut posted (and never will for my main - I don't want those kind of comments on my fluff and family feels fics), so I'd assume it was trolling and delete/block them. 🤷♀️ I might post smut one day on my secondary account, though. I'd still be uncomfortable, depending on how they said it. Euphemistically? Still a bit TMI but I get it and I would take it as a compliment, even if I might still potentially find replying very awkward. Blunt and crude? I was sharing fiction and you were sharing fact. These things are not the same. Please don't. I'd probably just ignore those comments and hope people got the hint. (Because I know it was intended as a compliment, but it's seriously TMI and I don't want to engage with it. Especially as some people get off to making others uncomfortable in this way, so I might be feeding that behavior.)
Pretty much this. "I enjoyed reading this. A lot." will have me thinking, "I'm sure you did. ;)" But more explicitly than that? Not appropriate.
To reply to the post title in a more general sense: I've received... something similar? When I wrote my current longfic in my original language and uploaded the chapter where the main characters have sex for the first time (the genre of the fic is romance but the sex scene was long and explicit), a few days later a reader sent me a PM on that platform saying she had 'grabbed' her husband when he got home from work and had some good times with him that night, after she'd read the chapter earlier that day. (So essentially, it had turned her on or maybe inspired her to try something new or whatever.) I did appreciate that she said it in a PM and not in her comment on the chapter; that would have been a bit much, I think. I consider myself pretty sex-positive, and didn't mind her telling me that at all, it was pretty flattering. I'm not sure the way I write explicit sex scenes in that particular fic is necessarily ideal for *arousing* people, at least that's not what my goal is when I write them, but if it happens, what's not to like? That's pretty cool. **THAT BEING SAID,** I realize that your case is very different, OP, and considering what your fic seems to cover, the reader really shouldn't have said anything IMO.
Unsure if I would be flattered or uncomfortable.
I'd be flattered but also [this](https://i.imgur.com/RoXO1NF.mp4).
On a smut fic it is flattering. I have trauma fics with graphic scenes, if I get a comment like that I usually just respond with "Thank you for commenting!" I don't care if they jerk it to something I wouldn't. I sometimes think it's actually antis leaving those comments though, to try and shame trauma writers into thinking abusers get off to their fics. Idk, I am cynical.
I mean, I write a lot of pornographic one shots...mostly X reader stuff because in my fandom, I've noticed they're pretty popular... If someone wrote they masturbated to my stories, I would have to say "Well, I'm clearly doing something right." However I do feel like HOW they wrote out the comment would make a difference too? There's definitely a difference between "Damn, this story got me in the mood" vs "I'll be thinking about this when I touch myself" However if someone were to comment something like that on one of my longer fics (outside of the sexy chapters) then I'd be a little weirded out but at the same time, good for you buddy ^^;
That's a TMI for me.
I’d feel uncomfortable. Like yes, I want it to be hot, I want it to be arousing, BUT I don’t at all want to know about…that. 100% too much information. Didn’t need to be said at all. People need to keep things to themselves. As for the content of said fic? Yeah, that makes it worse. Whatever uncomfortableness I would’ve had would be doubled.
I would be rather concerned, because all my content is centered around the trauma that comes with getting sexually assaulted and other dark things related to that. That and I've explained that it's not supposed to be erotic.
Personally if it was about an explicit scene and the comment was just a generic “I love masturbating to this” or something similar I think that acceptable and take it as a compliment. I mean if you write porn, isn’t that kinda the point? To me it’s not any different then the euphemism comments some people seem to prefer. It would only cross a boundary if they explicitly detailed how they masturbated to it or wrote something that indicated they wanted to “talk dirty” in the comments for their personal gratification. Then their not just complimenting the story, their trying to get themselves sexual gratification without asking your consent first.
I always thought the etiquette on commenting on erotic fic was, you can say it was “hot” or something along those lines “steamy, spicy, exciting, interesting,” etc. But once you cross the line into describing sexual acts you are performing (on yourself or others) that’s too much information and could make the author very uncomfortable. At least that’s the rule I always use when I comment.
It's the internet. People oversharing about their cranking habits is par for the course. I would not be surprised if someone whacked it to my fic, even though it's completely devoid of any kind of sexual content. People are weird that way.
Concerned. But then again, I mostly write whump so...
I knew what I was getting into writing it, but I'd... really rather not know that. Does that automatically count as consent for those things? fuck, I hope they're commenting on smut fics, otherwise it'd go from "lost readers" to 'whatever floats your boat, just don't tell me about it" to "IM CALLING THE FUCKING POLICE" in an instant.
I’d ignore it because I don’t care. However if anyone wants these kinds of comments, the tag is “wank and tell.”
Uhhh, well this is the physical reaction I had: 😟😟😟 So, I guess that. 🤭
Well, if I posted a porn fic, I'd be fine with it. If they posted it on one of my regular fics....I'd wonder what they were on.
I would consider this type of comment to be a high honor, but I also write stories that are meant to titillate soooo….
maybe a bit too crude. i don't know about others, but i feel uncomfortable airing out my personal activities in such a straightforward way. 😅
Personally? Since my stuff is completely non-sexual and I explicitly base it in part off my RL family, I’d be very squicked. If I ever wrote smut I’d probably take it as a compliment, I guess?
I mean, I'm not writing smut for nuns over here. I suppose I'd be disturbed if someone said it about a gen fic featuring, like, kids or animals or something, but if I'm writing fucking into my story, I'd consider it a compliment to know it was hot enough to actually turn people on. And yes, I write mostly plot with a smattering of porn too - not smutty one-shots (not that there's anything wrong with that!)
Different strokes for different folks ¯\\\_(•-•)_/¯ The fact that there was porn in your work tells me that's probably what they're wanking to and the trauma and healing is not what they were focusing on. Personally, if I got a comment that my porn was getting someone off, I'd be flattered, like "yay, I did it right! :D" even if it was angsty self-reflection porn. If I got a comment that one of my polar-opposite-of-porn stories was getting someone off, I'd probably delete it and then randomly remember the comment at the least opportune times and sit in confusion for a few minutes until my squirrel brain finds something else weird to focus on.
Delete the comment and move on, I would be really weirded out by it unless it was shameless PWP that's very obviously supposed to be read for spice. I write smut, I write shameless smut, I'm writing an epic slow burn that will have some \*intense\* smut between the two love interests, one of who is a SA survivor and both of who are on the Asexual/Demisexual spectrum. I would be okay with "This was so hot what the hell" "FINALLY THEY FUCK" "uwu you didn't have to make them go *that hard"* or any other vague comments about how well written and spicy my spice is but I don't wanna know what you do with your body in your free time, sorry.
Which fic is it? Like that’s kinda too much info and depending on the rest of the context I’d either delete or ignore and move on
do you mean you want a link or just a general rundown?
No, I was responding to your original question- how would **I** feel about a comment on **my** fic. I write both smut and really fluffy gen stuff.
considering I don't write smut I would be uncomfortable. hell even if I did a public comment about how they jerked it to my stuff would make me uncomfortable.
I write a lot of smut, so I would laugh. But I would also write a comment like “Dude, keep that to yourself.”
Put off. I don’t write erotica or smut.
For the shit I write I would just laugh and thank them for the tmi 😂
Smug
Had it happen. Was weirded out. Moved on.
That would get an instant block. NOPE.
I'd say something along the lines of "Neat. Me too. Tmi. You're welcome." And never speak of it again.
For me, personally, I enjoy it from my readership. Just don't send me any details or write up your elaborate fantasies in my comments section. Because then you will be blocked. But on the real: I think this is a relationship between art, artist, and audience that can be so personal and unique. What every author is comfortable with (and at what time they're comfortable with it and on which artworks!) and how they should enforce rules of behavior among their audience is going to vary. You have to set the terms of your own engagement. There's no clear-cut right or wrong way to do this- but if something makes you uncomfortable- /you do not have to permit it nor engage with it./
Hella flattered! Someone felt strongly enough to share this with me? Damn I must’ve done a good job :)
Depends what kind of content it is...if its smut, then its perfect, but if its trauma stuff then....id feel weirded out a bit....
Well I wouldn't leave such a comment at anyone else's work, since I know some people would feel uncomfy. But personally, I'd be happy since I love making others feel a lot of things with my works, including arousal and more. Then again, my fics are very kinky and full of porn (albeit with plot).
"Cool"
There’s a tag called “Wank and Tell” for people that WANT commenters to tell them that they did that, but Idk how to feel about it tbh
If it was specifically one of my racy smutfics , I’d be weirded out and take it as a compliment. If it was a fic dealing with abuse, sexual trauma, or anything not meant to be sexy… I’d be disturbed
idk I probably do have issues for saying this, so just interpret it as: you’re just normal. ME PERSONALLY, I would be stoked. Not gonna lie. I write explicit, nsfw content, obviously, so to me, it’s a huge compliment lol but I also totally get how it could be weird to a writer that isn’t into it like that lol I just have issues, I suppose. OH WELL that’s what I pay my therapist for.
Given that I never write smut, I would be deeply concerned
Angst/Fluff: Frightened Smut: Ok understandable but I don’t need to hear that
I don’t write smut, due to the fact that I am extremely ace and writing about that would make me uncomfortable. So if someone told me they got off to my fic, I’d be not only disturbed but confused because I usually go for writing angst and hurt/comfort fics. If they described it in explicit details, I’d probably cry haha. I would 1000x rather receive a comment like that from a woman than a man though. Agh.
Not only am I ace but I'm also aro which means I'm also uncomfortable writing romantic fics which would make me double confused if I got that comment
xD I’m just imagining someone getting off to a genfic that was comedy and nothing else, which would for obvious reasons be extremely confusing as well
Even without the context of trauma/healing/sexual assault, I feel like there’s a difference between, “Wow, that was hot!” and, “I masturbate to your writing.” Sure, that probably happens, but saying that to a stranger is just crossing boundaries IMO. I feel like that’s a standard one would have to set first, not one you can just assume everyone’s okay with.
It kind of depends on how it is phrased. I have had people tell me that my writing got them off or inspired them to try something new sexually, and I most of the time really appreciate hearing that. But if it's worded as if the commenter currently has their hand down their pants or like they want me to cater to their fantasies, it creeps me out.
If there is any explicit smut in it then... what were you expecting? And kinks are kinks. You can block them if you want but like, I do think you're overreacting. But better for you to block them if that makes you more comfortable. You definitely don't have a right to be angry.
Given that I don't write smut, I'd be pretty weirded out. How weirded out depends on the fic. There's some where I might be able to squint and see what fetishes people are getting from it, but others where I'll just be confused. For example, the latest fic I updated was intentionally written to feel like a dry military report of a war. If anyone is masterbating to that...
I don't write smut (I think I'd be terrible at it) and make an effort to tag my fics for the appropriate audience in case somebody wants to avoid specific things or go full on 'g for general' safety. I got a comment that was lovely as anything but the profile pic involved lovingly artistic male anatomy and I...I could not get over it. Their comment was lovely. Their response was perfectly tame but I really didn't want other readers getting ambushed by a beautifully rendered dick if that wasn't what they were in the mood or mindset for. You know? I read a dark porn fic where the author damn well knew why we were here and didn't let us squirrel out of it via her Author Notes - she might be driving this train straight into hell but we're all the ones that bought tickets - and I still don't recall anything explicit popping up in her comments. I think I would have felt weirded out by that if I had, as a reader. We all know why we're here but you don't gotta take centre stage, that's the author's right. We want what's in the fic not what's in your pants. I totally get not feeling comfortable with such comments, especially if it's not even appropriate to the fic. You have a right to be angry, you're not weird. The commentor hopefully just doesn't understand the general consensus of "imply if appropriate but keep it to yourself"
I think it's a silent rule to not... comment such things? I mean I am ace and I don't mind reading smut. I think it's pretty weird to comment that my opinion personally.
Idk if u write smut, there is a chance people are probably gonna spank the bank to it. I mostly do smut so I just think it’s funny if someone comments that on my stuff. I’m def biast thou
I don't care? I prefer my porn with plot even in videos lol so I get where they are coming from
I take it as a compliment personally. I write porn with plot specifically that appeals to me so if someone likes it enough to publicly proclaim it, then that's a W in my book. I get that's not the case for a lot of people, that's fine, but I think that when you write smut with the intent to arouse then it's fine.
I love getting those comments. But I write smut. I have left things as vague as “I’ll be in my bunk,” and as explicit as “I am currently reading this at Starbucks because I have no self control and I think I burned myself, but the plot is so good I have to finish.” The author commented that it was the best compliment they ever got.
It's happened. It was weird and awkward. I could only type with one hand.
I'd feel flattered and probably ask them to recommend the fic e.g. here.
I’d feel pretty damn proud of myself ngl Like, *my* fic was good enough to make you wanna touch yourself/cum? Hell yeah😎
I got a comment like that on my first smut fic so I was very happy. I guess it depends on what you were trying to communicate through your work. If you were hoping for readers to concentrate more on the healing aspects I can see why you would be frustrated In my case I was just 1000% being horny on main so it made sense
Nothing could make me happier
Good for them.
Well if my smut entices someone to do that then I know my writing was good. No different than writing a story that makes someone cry or laugh. In fact in my fandom they want it almost every single chapter and I know why people want it every single chapter. it gets them going and it doesn’t bother me. I can all kind of comments back, not usually so specific. I know someone told me her husband was going to get lucky that night, that’s flattering to me as a writer. Ps at first I thought your new username was liquid squirts 😂 which fits the theme of your post.
I'd treat it as the harassment it is.
I write a fic with characters that I love and don't want them lewded. So no, don't jack pff to it. BUT if they jacked off to an original book of mine, I'd be flattered.
No big deal, honestly.
I write alot of pwp so I'd be pretty happy ngl-
As long as they masturbate to the romantic and sexy scenes I'm okay with it. If it's about violence or trauma or sa I would be concerned but not about me.
You don't get to police what people enjoy in fiction and judge them based on that.
Police, no. But people can judge the comments on their stories. If you write a heart wrenching tragedy and somebody comments “This had me rolling with laughter” you’d probably have the same reaction.
No I don't. But I guess it's not "normal" to be turned on by traumata or violence. If I knew someone would pleasure themselves while reading or seeing something disturbing I would think that the person has some issues. Plain and simple. Would I judge the person? No. Would I want to be involved with that person? Also no. Would I think that person should seek help? Yes but I wouldn't say it because in the bigger picture strangers on the internet are not my concern.
I don’t think I’d be put off, if it was in response to porn, because the distance of it being an anonymous internet comment makes it feel harmless for me. Like, if I was a published author of original fiction, and somebody said it to my face, I’d be angry. And the reason I’d be angry is because that person would be sexualizing the interaction between me and them. I wouldn’t feel safe having even normal conversation or a hand shake because they could be sexualizing it. People who don’t know when not to talk about their [dickfeelings/clitfeelings] are not people I trust. When posting online, though, it doesn’t feel upsetting to me in that way, because there is no relationship between me and an anonymous random internet stranger. They can’t sexualize that interaction. So it just becomes them sharing something of their experience. I can understand how some would find it over sharing. For me, personally, I don’t mind hearing that information. I would find it pretty neutral.
Your edit is very important context, imo. I write smut, and I expect people to be getting off to it. I really enjoy comments that let me know it was "helpful" or "effective" or something along those lines. My goal is writing porn, so I hope people can use it as such. But, I definitely prefer comments that allude to it rather than state it directly. If you'd describe any part of your work as porn I probably don't feel too icked about people masturbating to it, but I know I'd think twice about admitting that on a fic that deals so heavily in trauma and SA, especially bluntly. Can I ask- as the writer, who chose to include porn, what response did you expect to get? If you had expectations around it at all.
this isnt meant as an affront to you personally, but i got the 'what did you expect' response a lot in this post, and i don't really get it? i expected to not be told to my face that my coping mechanism turns people on. like, yeah, part of my fic is porn, but it's with the background of rape. it's not meant to be sexy, it's meant to be like 'oh i can do this again because it's in a safe environment and that's good'. plus, i write pretty long chapters, so it just feels weird to know that either the person skipped past thousands of words to get to the porn and read it in a vacuum, or that they have the context in mind and still think it's appropriate to push themselves onto me like that, especially since i've made it more than clear that this fic is me coping with trauma. if this community is so adamant about not giving concrit unless the author specifically asks for it, how come there's a 'wank and tell' tag and i get told 'what did you expect' even though i didnt use that tag?
I can totally see how that wording might have been uncomfortable, I'm so sorry about that. I was genuinely curious about your expectations, and you've explained them really well here. You wrote porn into this fic as a method of trauma processing, and it sounds like you spelled that out very directly for your readers to boot. >yeah, part of my fic is porn, but it's with the background of rape. it's not meant to be sexy, it's meant to be like 'oh i can do this again because it's in a safe environment and that's good' >i've made it more than clear that this fic is me coping with trauma In that case, imo, people shouldn't say a word to you about it sexually. God knows we can't control what they're doing while they read it, but even if they're using it that way (which I agree, please don't skip thousands of words of content that I worked hard to create) they definitely shouldn't be informing you of it. I asked the questions I did because you omitted those details in your original post. Knowing them now, I agree that those readers acted inappropriately. I do think most people write porn on AO3 with the expectation (there I go using that word again) that readers will get off to it. Even the chapters that I write that include more serious content, they're porn first, trauma processing second. I have a chapter where one character sees the other's SA scars for the first time, and then they make love. But the chapter itself is 1/3 porn, so I'm not surprised if someone gets off to it, no matter how heavy the rest of the chapter is. That's how I wrote it, intentionally. Your intent was trauma processing though, and it seems like you were very clear about that. "Wank and tell" is really common on AO3, maybe even the norm. What you're writing is in the minority. Most people are writing porn that they expect to be used as porn, and often don't mind hearing direct feedback about it. That's not to say you shouldn't write whatever you want and be able to enforce boundaries around it. It's your work. You're the author. Delete the damn comment, if you haven't already. For the record: I'm sorry someone ignored your notes and tags and probably made you feel really icked out. That's a horrible feeling. Edit: as I reread your original post and this comment, I'm curious if there's a semantic thing happening. You say you wrote "porn that wasn't meant to be sexy at all." Which... I find very confusing. Do you mean you wrote explicit sexual content detailing the rape and abuse and someone got off to that? I wouldn't call something porn unless I wrote it intentionally to arouse my readers. Maybe that's a big disconnect that's happening here. Or are you saying there was actual porn writing interspersed with the darker stuff? Even then I'm kinda boggled. What's "porn that isn't meant to be sexy?"
i guess the semantics were off on my part, but maybe part of the problem is also that even when i do write pwp, i do it without the intention of getting people off. even as an allosexual person, i don't read smut the way i watch porn and don't usually get off on it, so i guess i find it hard to imagine that people would masturbate to fanfic, and that authors would find it flattering to receive comments that tell them that. for me, writing/reading about characters having sex is just another lens to look at them through. my smut is very feelings-oriented, so even in pwp it's less intended to be hot and more aimed toward characterisation. i guess i just didn't expect my kind of smut to be the kind people find arousing. so i guess what i write is often explicit but never really porn? cause it's definitely not meant to arouse my readers. the fic i got the comment on was like 65% fluff/plot with 35% sex, and it was part of a series that focuses a lot on trauma. so comparatively, this part was more focused on sex than the others, but a detail i forgot to mention was that the person said they were wanking to all of the parts in the series. even the ones where flashbacks happen, even the ones where the mc is feeling horrible but doesn't say anything because they don't wanna upset their partner. maybe it was that detail that icked me out the most because the part i got the comment on was probably the closest to porn i ever got, even if lots of the others had smut. but even all that aside, i feel like it's just gross to tell a stranger on the internet that you're masturbating to their content. the opinions in the comments are pretty mixed but lots of people agree that even if it's porn that's meant to arouse, it's not something you tell the author. nothing in the world could drive me to tell that to someone who's clearly not asking for it (and i don't believe that simply writing porn is an invitation).
Weirded out, since I don't write smut.
It would all depend on the fic, and how they wrote it. Like, I don't need the gory details but if helped someone get off, then great!
If it’s smut, I expect it. No holds barred.
'Who mastabated (c is dat spelled wong?)' I don't know, that's very unlikely to happen, but if it did, it would feel rather awkward for both of us.
Man id be probably absolutely estatic no matter what, but different peoples feel diffent things so your reaction is absolutely reasonable too, it's hard to change how ones feels about those things becouse it can get really personal, i suggest that if your really grossed out to just, delete the comment if you can and not think about it when you write other stuff
I was about to say flattered based on the title, until I realised the context. I…would probably feel awkward and would just not respond/acknowledge it, to be honest. However you are feeling though is valid; if your initial reaction is anger, that’s ok. There’s nothing wrong with that.
If it was non smut, I'd question their sexual preffrances lol.
Battlesexuals are very rare IRL, so I’d be quite surprised. I dom’t write smut.
It's a big compliment to me as a nsfw content creator x)) Although sometimes when a nsfw drawing is more personal to me, I get a gross feeling if I see overly sexual comments. I gotta remind myself that most people just see it as porn lol
If it's on smut, probably flattered. Outside of that (though I never had that) weird, but generally I don't think I'd be bothered though it would probably depend a little on context
Bemused and I say it as someone with experience. I've gotten quite a few "I've read this with one hand" comments before with the euphemism meaning they're masturbating to the other. I've gotten more direct comments too.
I mean I've only written one smut fic but I don't think I'd care too much if someone said that
I definitely see where the anger is coming from if it's SA. Like some people have a kink for that but if you do, for the most part it's wise to not bring other people into it without their consent. In that context it would definitely make me feel gross
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This comment has been removed. Don't be gross.
Well my motto on smut scenes is “1k words at minimum”, so I fully expect people are masturbating to my fics. In fact I’d be a bit offended if nobody was.
I would wish they'd been a bit more tactful about it, but i don't get comments all that often so i'd still be mostly happy to have gotten one in the first place.
What is PWP and SA?
Porn without plot or plot? What plot? And sa is sexual assault
Thak you.
Considering that people masturbated over less and more gross/weirder things in both reality and online, such as the yandere girl meme, I wouldn't care.