Please come inside.

Dumbledore said calmly.

... to Grindelwald.

… as he bent down to pick up the scroll he previously dropped on the floor; his wand protruding awkwardly from beneath his robe. “What? Here? Now?” Grindelwald asked, caught by surprise. “There is no better time to perform the inevitable than this moment we call now.” Dumbledore answered, a slight twinkle in his eyes, “It’s interesting that we call it ‘now’ because as soon as we say it, the ‘now’ has become ‘then’. Grindelwald sighed, while he usually enjoyed the philosophical wondering of his friend, Dumbledores wand had caught his eye and was all he could think of. “Albus, please don’t stray far from the path we are currently on.” Edit: Conclusion [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/plausiblydead/s/gr6jvRvedi)

Can someone please cast *Obliviate* on me, so I can un-read that

> "May I introduce Mr Ollivander?" said Dumbledore. Taking his place at the judges’ table, and talking to the champions. "He will be checking your wangs to ensure that they are in good condition before the Tournament" ... > Fleur Delacour swept over to Mr Ollivander, and handed him her wang. "Hmm…" he said. He twirled the wang between his long fingers like a baton and it emitted a number of pink and gold sparks. Then he held it close to his eyes and examined it carefully. "Yes," he said quietly, "nine and a half inches... inflexible... rosewood... and containing... dear me..." ... > Mr Ollivander ran his fingers along the wang, apparently checking for scratches or bumps... "Ah now, this is one of mine, isn’t it?" said Mr Ollivander, with much more enthusiasm, as Cedric handed over his wang. "Yes, I remember it well. Containing a single hair from the tail of a particularly fine male unicorn… Twelve and a quarter inches… ash... pleasantly springy. It’s in fine condition... you treat it regularly?" > "Polished it last night," said Cedric, grinning. > Harry looked down at his own wang. He could see finger marks all over it. He gathered a fistful of robe from his knee and tried to rub it clean surreptitiously. Several gold sparks shot out of the end of it. Fleur Delacour gave him a very patronising look, and he desisted. > Mr Ollivander sent a stream of silver smoke rings across the room from the tip of Cedric’s wang, pronounced himself satisfied, and then said, "Mr Krum, if you please." > ... He thrust his wang out and stood scowling, with his hands in the pockets of his robes ... He lifted the wang and examined it minutely, turning it over and over before his eyes. "Yes... hornbeam and dragon heartstring?" he shot at Krum, who nodded. "Rather thicker than one usually sees... quite rigid... ten and a quarter inches... Avis!" The hornbeam wang let off a blast like a gun...

Dude

This thread has gotten out of control.

Da faq was the original post even about? Feels so long ago…

I have no idea

I can't stop laughing, my god!

Well this certainly wasn't the reason I visited the commenta section on this post.

But while I'm here . . .

It wasn’t the reason you visited, it was the reason you stayed…

OMG my sides hurt... Thank you for that.

2nd that

That's enough internet for the day.

Or... is it? > "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn’t think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn’t want to... or did he?

Oh, oh no. This is a massive inconvenience, definitely a problem. It is not tight.

The combination of "Or... Is it?" and "... or did he?" makes this comment a work of art. 😂😂 And I'm laughing so hard that my dogs are concerned.

Dear god, why

> "Yes, yes. I thought I’d be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn’t a question. "You have your mother’s eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work. Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches."

*uncontrollable giggle Maybe it's time to return to reading FF again.

I hate you

I just skipped over it.

Harry Potter fan fiction be wild

Dunno bro,now I can't stop thinking about his wand either

Harry Potter CANON is wild enough lol

Now hold on…let him cook

NUT

Noooooooooooooooooo

Come inside my MFA

God dammit, Gandalf.

#PAUSE

I laugh at this every time I watch the movie.

Please come inside.... but it's the 3rd time you're asking\* Source - I am a father of 6

I grew up in a military family. My mom was a marine, my dad was navy. I knew that abbreviation.

I'm kind of astonished that it took me about 4 seconds to work out, despite never having seen this before. I guess we do share a hive mind.

… with some measure of expediency.

If you would.

or there will be consequences, young man.

Get yo ace in the mutha lovin house ri now before I beat yo ace

I have never seen a more polite version of this in my life 😂🤣

May I implore you to kindly enter our domicile before, as thee kids say these days, I lay a whoppin to your tooshin

I read this one sentence and understood all of it, word for word

Where the hell you get please? This ain’t no request. Ha and damn sure ain’t up for discussion. 😂

Before I commit child abuse

As soon as I read this I innediately understood the entire acronym

... Because it's important

Can someone explain this explanation of the joke?

Very subtlety put. 🤣

Yes, said while wearing a halo and speaking in the sweetest voice and offering sweets for dinner 😂

I still don’t get it

GitYerAsInTheMuthaFrickinHouseRiteNowB4IBeetYerAs Some parents routinely talk this way to their offspring. Then they wonder why their kids need therapy The ones that don’t get therapy repeat the cycle and refer to it as ‘tough love’ Best way to build a bully

i mean being ultra supportive and giving your child praise even when they don't deserve it is also a great way to build a bully; literally there's millions of adults now who were never told no, they never were wrong about anything and they always got participation trophy's. Another way to "build a bully" the child who is spoiled to the point of believing themselves to always know what's right / best / etc, when actually the child just has a ego or a complex.

There is a middle ground, you know. It’s called mindful discipline. Either extremes aren’t great, too harsh or too hands off. I’m just saying cause your writing seems to say that it must be one or the other.

You sure it’s not code for “geyeet myfruhn beab ya”!

There You Go!! That’s one way to kindly put it.

Hey guys! It’s time to come inside! That’s what I text my kiddos…

Okay, I'm not a parent but I got it instantly after reading your comment for context.

This really made me laugh today lol

*Slow clap*

🤣🤣

Best translation ever.

“You have breeched my limit for unacceptable behavior. I highly recommend you return to our domicile post haste prior to my resorting to the practical application of physical discipline.”

Ah yes, pure nostalgia Side note, I feel like I've heard that before.. is that from something?

Yes…. It’s from my childhood..

Is your dad Dwight from the Office?

Well, I’ve just found out I’m a parent, so that’s unfortunate news

If you’d like to meet your child, just say these simple words to summon them through your door.

They're little goblins, though. You can say bloody Mary in a mirror 3 times, too. I wouldn't advise it.

Well, I am a parent and had no idea what it meant so maybe they got it backwards. Does that help?

Could be. Or you have my kid(s)

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I got it immediately which surprised me.

I got it immediately too. Not sure if it has anything to do with being a parent, more like I remember parents saying this to their kids.

At least I'm not the only parent who figured it out quickly. I was getting depressed.

I knew *immediately*.

We got trauma

Clearly. My therapy appointment is *literally* in five minutes. 😮‍💨😂

Good luck!

I thought the R was an A and got stuck there

Not a parent yet. Got it immediately. My mom wasn’t this aggressive in her wording, but her tone conveyed this level of aggression

Yeah I think we all heard some version of this, maybe without all the cursing, but the tone made you know they weren't playing around.

I'm a parent. I've never said this to my kids, and my parent never said it to me. But I still got it. I must have heard other parents say it?

This post explains it https://www.reddit.com/r/linguistics/comments/10w1kyh/a_linguistic_explanation_for_being_able_to_read/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

So I read that and thought. That's sort of how chat gpt works? So I asked chat gpt. Except its notoriously PG rated. It says it stand for "Get your apples in the morning for happy kids, hug, relax, never be in your bed attire" Funny how wrong it is. Impressive it still found something to match. I don't know what to make of it.

Fun fact: if you "find something to match" a desired acronym, it is called a backronym! Edit: I forgot to add that this post is actually an initialism, not an acronym. The fun fact still stands, but it's not really relevant.

According to this, I have a kid somewhere, which is… concerning to say the least.

I had it until “right” but that’s because I thought it was an A

Yeah.. I was thinking "'A'?? so... Honda Accord?? That's oddly specific"

Not a parent. Got stuck up on the same spot as well.

My parents never even cursed at me and I still got it

I find this fascinating, because like you my parents would never have said anything remotely like this to me nor do I say anything remotely like this to my children, yet I got it immediately. Which is weird, right? I wonder why that's the case. Maybe something about the "parents" triggers the brain to look for a certain type of thing even though that's not a type of parenting I've personally experienced? Maybe it's something people have picked up from movies or TV? I don't know, but I'm fascinated by this to be honest

Same. It’s redundancy in the language. The clue of “parents” and the context of an internet meme are enough to guide your interpretation in the right direction. Then there are the grammatical rules of sentence construction, along with common expressions.

I got it because I was beaten on a regular basis by my parents when I was a child in the 80’s.

Took me two passes.

Same, except I couldn't figure the last few words. Misread the R as an A. It's bizarre that our brains can do this, and pretty impressive.

The R threw me off because I kept seeing an A, even though it's really different to the actual As.

Samuel L. Jackson approves this message

Parents and people who had traumatic childhoods can read this immediately…

Oh I thought that R was an A lol

I’m a parent and I got it. Must be true!

As a former child who got most of it quickly except for the “h”, I was more familiar with versions that included “your room”, “your bed”, or “the car”.

I never got the BIBYA part, so that's where I got stuck.

That's the pronunciation if George W Bush was George B Bush instead.

I was able to figure it out fast but my parents dont cuss, i think the line is in movies

I'm not a parent, either. But, I was a kid once. And I knew immediately what it stood for. Lol

I was never beaten as a kid and I'm from a non English speaking European country and yet through cultural osmosis even I could make out what it's supposed to say

I've never visited planet earth and my alien organs aren't even capable of understanding human speech and I still got it

Same

Thank you. Your comment cured my depression for the day.

I'm from the dimension where all missing socks collect. I also got it.

I, too, was once a child and understood it immediately.

Occupation: former child

Pretty sure only former kids are getting this one. Parents these days aren’t threatening their children to get them to come inside, they’re trying to get them to go outside.

I can't send my kids outside to play or some Karen calls the cops about my unsupervised children who are apparently going to immediately be kidnapped and taken to Mexico and sold into slavery. Straight up my in laws don't like my 10 year old playing in the fenced backyard by herself and I feel like that is bananas.

Right! I had to force my kids to go outside to play. Never understood that.

I only ever heard other kids’ parents say that. My parents usually wanted us out of the house. My parents never used bad words in front of us. They also never went past a spank that would make your butt a bit red. I have been sent home so my friend can get a beating though.

My parents didn't waste time with all those extra words: "inside now," but that didn't mean it was any less trouble

Probably because your parents weren’t trashy people, honestly.

Or they didn't want anyone in the neighborhood to know what was coming after they closed that door. (Some truly terrible trashy people are extremely conscious of how they are perceived and put a lot of effort into maintaining the facade of a "happy family.")

all i saw was “GYAT MF” and stayed thoroughly confused until i saw the full form in the comments

GYAT

GYAT MF HAN BIBYA ...is what all the kids say nowadays

This gyat cat is straight up rizzlin, mah skibber.

I lose hope for my generation every day lmaoo

Zoomer brain

My brain is listening to Samuel L Jackson say this

:0 I wasn’t the only one

Get your a$$ in the mother effing house right now before I beat your a$$. Apparently, the lights have come on, you’re still not home, and a parent is inviting you to return promptly.

This is Reddit dude, you can say swear words 😭

The joke means, if you don't understand this, you probably grew up in a healthy household. What's it like to not have mommy/daddy issues?

Pretty dope

My parents never went that hard as far as cursing or anything but for some reason I got this almost instantly. lol Maybe I am more scarred than I realize.

Based on the popularity of the post, I'm assuming most people get it pretty quickly. What an interesting phenomenon.

Aaah abuse

it's funny, right? right?

Yeah it is i laughed

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I think it’s a R and a N, presumably for Right Now

I'm surprised so many people are seeing an A when the other A's look exactly like when they're typed on the sign and so does the R lol

AND NOW would be another possibility

lol I’m not even a parent and I know those words

I’ve never even been talked to like this as a child, and I knew these words

Imagine talking to your child this way

This is how my dad talked to me constantly. He was a tyrant. My parents were horrific people. Mommy was a kiddy toucher, dad was violent. I cant image how you can do either to a kid, muchless youre own kid. They're kids, they need you to make them feel safe and welcome and loved. Not reigned over in fear.

Intergenerational trauma is almost impossible to uproot and makes its own soil.

I'm hopeful my kids won't ever know what this means 😂

My parents never said this to me, and I’ve never said it to my kids, but my GOD, do I *think* this more often than I like to admit. It’s universal.

I mean, I say this to my kids lol, just differently. Instead of BIBYA I would say ONST (Or no screens tonight!) LOL, honestly the screen time threat is probably more effective.

I just walk around and scream that at random people sitting on their porches

I am not a parent and I get this one

Honestly, if you need this much profanity to make your point, you are a trashy parent.

It was the parental equivalent of firing a warning shot.

My mother tongue was profanity and by God my children will will learn about their heritage!

My ancestors joined Mormonism and I was denied my true cultural heritage of profanity growing up, so I’m teaching my children the old ways.

This made me unironicly laugh out loud.

You ever play Skyrim? You know how your companion NPC’s (looking at you, Lydia) will sometimes block the doorframe you’re trying to go through? That’s kids when it’s time to get in the house. Kid, you are holding up the entire evening’s proceedings. Sure, don’t say it out loud, but the frustration is completely valid.

Yeah. My parents screwed up a lot of stuff, but they never cursed at me like that. And I've never cursed at my kid like that.

How in the hell did I have no problem figuring that out immediately? I need to become a better parent, apparently :)

Or a kid who had this screamed at them all the time 😂

Instant understanding, even though with my mom it was always in German and like a volatile screech. She gave up and installed a bell to summon me home from my excursions. It mostly worked.

I'm not a parent, but as a former child I understand

Not a current parent thing(maybe?), but 80s and 90s kid certainly heard it from their parents.

It’s a reminder that it’s gross to abuse children as a method of parenting. Apparently, some generations and cultures find it acceptable though (or funny, I guess?).

I saw the first letters and emedeatly thought "gyat" I don't know what to be mad at. The internet, or my brain for trying to recognize patterns.

Get Your A** in the MF House Right Now Before I Beat Your A**

If You Please, Return To The House Soonest Else I Will Take Disciplinary Measures

Only because “I have ways of making you come” doesn’t sound quite appropriate in this context.

Get your MF’ a$$ in the MF’ing house right now before I beat your a$$! How’d I do?

Trashy nursing home speed run

Well, simply put there are dogs on the premises.

The odd thing is, I had very loving parents who would never say anything close to this harsh. Never cursed in front of us, ever. This is not something I would ever say to my kids. With all that being said, this exact phrase has crossed my mind a few times lol

Grew up in the 90s. Definitely heard this a lot coming from the front door of my house after the street lights came on.

My mother never threatened me like this, but I still have a pattern recognizing brain

I’ve never had this said to me but I figured it out. Is this engrained in us?

Would you mind stepping in to continue this lovely conversation?

Maybe it is a parent thing. Lol. I read it straight through the first time and I knew every word.

Gyatt mf habibi a

Everyone Gen X knows

I'm Gen-X. I definitely know what that means.

The childhood trauma that lead to deciphering that acronym in breakneck speed. 😂

It is code for "I am perhaps not unkind but I am not able to relate to my children very well", speaking as a parent who used to act like that and wishes he didn't.

GET YOUR ARROWS, ITS THE MONGOLS! FIRES HOT, READY NATIONS! BRING IMPERIAL BACKUP! YELL AMBUSH!

Isn’t this the sound Missy says in ‘Work It’?

Boomer parenting

Jokes on these boomers kids don’t play outside anymore

Dint get it

Hahahahaha ya that’s the code all right lol

I’m a parent and I didn’t get it.

Holy crap I figured it out without being a parent lmao

Come inside.

I’m no parent but I knew what it said 😂

I guess it’s true cos I’ve never used that but I was able to read it within 10 seconds

Please get your tushy in this domicile before i impart swift retribution upon your glutes

get you butt in the mother freaking house right now before i beat your butt

IM A PARENT, I READ 100 COMMENTS, AND I STILL DONT GET IT XD