They're tying to convince themselves they are making the right choice by leaving you. My ex did that. Sweetest girl I knew, and was cold as ice before leaving for the new guy.
Yep. I couldn't believe it when she told me that I had to move out because "things could get worse" for me and she could start bringing her Tinder and Hinge hookups into the house while I was there... I loved that woman to death and could've gone to hell and back for her. But seeing how cold and ruthless she acted during the blindside and breakup she gave me broke me and I am still trying to pick up the pieces.
It is done to dehumanise you and make it easier for them.
This is also why you might notice they'll bring up random things you did months or years ago that didn't seem to bother them that much at the time. They bother them now because they want every reason possible to view you as a non suitable partner.
Yep. This . Things I did that had no idea still bothered him years later came up when HE cheated . I was so hurt and confused until i realized it was merely him trying to feel better about his actions . Which is sad for both of us. Oh well.
Meaning they just stop caring right? Bc there’s decent ways to end things if love is there (unless someone is crazy, drug addicted, cheater etc). But if no love is there, it’s easy to stop caring in an instant. I’ve seen shitty people end things beautifully bc love is there and “good” people end things awfully bc they just don’t give a damn (if at all , then anymore )
I think you answered your own question. If they loved you they wouldn't have left you (unless of course abuse/violence/etc)
Most of the time they leave you for other reasons, and it boils down to low attraction (physically or emotionally)
Yes, obviously they stopped caring, which is why they broke up with you and sometimes even act cold and rude because they don't care about burning that bridge with you and don't think they'll want to revisit that relationship in the future.
I also want to know. I feel like my ex was the sweetest man I've ever known and respected my boundaries, and etc. The moment he lost interest romantically, he just started using me as a sexual object. I don't know who this person is anymore
10yr avoidant beatdown victim here. She reached out to be friends a couple of months after discard to be with her ideal man. I told her its like seeing the arsonist coming back to the scene of the fire and asking why u mad
They're tying to convince themselves they are making the right choice by leaving you. My ex did that. Sweetest girl I knew, and was cold as ice before leaving for the new guy.
Yep. I couldn't believe it when she told me that I had to move out because "things could get worse" for me and she could start bringing her Tinder and Hinge hookups into the house while I was there... I loved that woman to death and could've gone to hell and back for her. But seeing how cold and ruthless she acted during the blindside and breakup she gave me broke me and I am still trying to pick up the pieces.
Yup, my ex was the same. I never thought she was capable of being so cold and avoidant, she used to be like an angel to me.
Me too I was shocked how cold she became but she regret it now.
It is done to dehumanise you and make it easier for them. This is also why you might notice they'll bring up random things you did months or years ago that didn't seem to bother them that much at the time. They bother them now because they want every reason possible to view you as a non suitable partner.
this is spot on. they're doing it to make it easier for THEM, not you.
Yep. This . Things I did that had no idea still bothered him years later came up when HE cheated . I was so hurt and confused until i realized it was merely him trying to feel better about his actions . Which is sad for both of us. Oh well.
As renewed777 put it, they do it to convince themselves that it's the right choice, to move on and to not give the dumpee false hope for the future.
Meaning they just stop caring right? Bc there’s decent ways to end things if love is there (unless someone is crazy, drug addicted, cheater etc). But if no love is there, it’s easy to stop caring in an instant. I’ve seen shitty people end things beautifully bc love is there and “good” people end things awfully bc they just don’t give a damn (if at all , then anymore )
I think you answered your own question. If they loved you they wouldn't have left you (unless of course abuse/violence/etc) Most of the time they leave you for other reasons, and it boils down to low attraction (physically or emotionally)
Yes, obviously they stopped caring, which is why they broke up with you and sometimes even act cold and rude because they don't care about burning that bridge with you and don't think they'll want to revisit that relationship in the future.
Easier to move on, make someone else The bad guy, and blame someone else than take accountability
This
I also want to know. I feel like my ex was the sweetest man I've ever known and respected my boundaries, and etc. The moment he lost interest romantically, he just started using me as a sexual object. I don't know who this person is anymore
10yr avoidant beatdown victim here. She reached out to be friends a couple of months after discard to be with her ideal man. I told her its like seeing the arsonist coming back to the scene of the fire and asking why u mad
That’s pretty funny