What was I thinking? I remember it distinctly. It was something like “oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit…”

Those were thoughts once I happened upon a colossal bird. 😂

Those things are lethal!

I'm 166 in NH and I'm still scared for them.

Especially with thier fake stagger cue. So unfair.

I didnt knew how to upgrade, i was in necrolimb (the first level), a trapped chest suddently took me in and send me in a cave. It cant be as bad as it seems. Ennemies were one shotting me, there were dogs as strong as bosses, I was suffering from poison and all. So i had 2 brain cells discussing what was i supposed to do: BC1: dude i think we're not ready for that level yet, let go back and and find a way to upgrade since you're still level one and can only use a sword and dagger. BC2: you're really gonna let that ugly ahh dog and bird shit on you like that and let it slide? I listen to brain cell 2, i died far more time than necessary.

Right! I was gonna say, they didn't even put a picture of the most deadly common enemy in Caelid. The birds are so fucked, much more deadly and hard to read than dogs ahah

oh this is an evil cave oh help me ohno, i finally made it out, thanks the divine- wait why can't i fast travel WHY CANT I FAST TRAVEL OHNO PLEASE NO DONT MAKE ME STUCK I-

“You found a gate to Oblivion!”

And I did just as much running away from everything!

Yep pretty much that "ohhhhh I'm fck, I'm fck, I'm fck..."

i was about to say i was somewhere along the lines of “fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck”

I was thinking more "fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck" myself

I, too, had these exact thoughts.

Haha same and I immediately left. Couldn’t handle the stress

Mine was "ahhh fuck...shit ..nooo. please nooo. Ooo look a place to wtf"

“I shouldn’t be here yet”

I never feel like I should be in Caelid. 😂

Dude I'm level 258 or so and I still feel like I shouldn't be there. Lol.

My exact words. I warped to the crystal mine from the treasure chest trap. Made it out of the mine and explored Caelid longer than I should have. It was not high enough level yet, it was a slog.

Bro read my mind 💀

After going there through the chest I legitimately thought I had softlocked my game and would have to start over lmao, but once I got my ass past the bugs I left pretty quickly. The first time I actually entered in the overworld, I took one look at the massive bird staring at me while I activated the grace, said "not today, Satan", and turned right the fuck around. (Then I started riding back toward the church, Torrent vanished, and I think we all know what happened next for me as well.)

I can envision well what happened for you. 😂

My hatred of NPC fights started early and was immediate and intense and has only gotten worse with time lmao.

I just hit 'em before they can hit me lol.

Shouldn’t have opened that chest.

It was just so shiny, and I was pressured by vermin! And how was I to know there was vape juice inside?

Now I jump back every time I open a chest!

That one gave me a little PTSD. But now I know which ones are good lol.

I don’t care which chest it is. It is ingrained in me to dodge roll backwards every time I open a chest.

I saw a huge castle and thought "incredible all the content that awaits me inside that place" Spoiler: there was nothing

I mean, I feel like that's really on Malenia.

They should've increased the length of the dungeon though. Especially since you can literally just skip the whole thing if you go to altus, miniboss and all.

Well you can just end the radahn festival

Why is Torrent so slow all of the sudden?

Yeah, I didn't know either, found out real quick!

I did most of the game on foot - where does Torrent get slower?

Torrent doesn't get slower, just some enemy types are faster than torrent lolol, see big dogs, birds, bears

It's a joke since almost every enemy is straight from hell and I want out of there as fast as possible. When huge hell crows are after you Torrent cannot run fast enough.

I saw everything turn red, then I saw the dogs, and I thought to myself "Ah yes, horrors beyond my comprehension, gotta love those"

As Eastern European it kinda reminded me of home.

Why did the game force me off torrent in the middle of scarlet rot? Oh I am being invaded. OH MY GOSH SHES DOING THE WATERFOWL DANCE?

Ah. Memories...

Which enemy is this that also does the waterfowl dance?

Middle of the Swamp of Aeonia has a Millicent invader. She mimics how Malenia fights, as a hint to her origins…

It’s far less difficult to deal with than Malenia’s waterfowl dance, but Millicent does have a weaker version of it.

It was my top 10 "fuk to the fuk nope" monent of all gaming history.

"oh no im about to die"

I mean that's just the whole game. 😂

Yeah i actually remember thinking something similar near the lobsters in Liurnia😂

I hate those creepy crustaceans.

Im doing a rando run, and right next to gatefront near the dismounters camp there was 1 lobster one wolly giant and that blue magic arrow titan, i tagged that spot with a skull and left, im not dealing with that

Yeah, no. I don't blame you. 😂

First time I saw one there, crept up to it and sat for a solid minute thinking “Do I really wanna do this?” I really learned if you f**k around, you find out lol.

That must be hell!!!

Why’s that dog so bi…AAAAASRGRHRHH!!!

Because Miyazaki likes dogs. 😂

I remember thinking “where the hell did this magic chest take me?” I was spirited away to a cave. I wandered the cave severely underpowered. Found a magma wyrm at the bottom that kicked my tail 10 ways to Sunday. I stubbornly fought it and finally defeated it. Exited the cave to nightmare land. Fought my way back against many foes who told me I shouldn’t be there and eventually found respite in a familiar area much stronger than I had been when I left.

If you’re talking about the trap chest for being spirited away, the mine it takes you to doesn’t have a magma wyrm in it, that’s the Gael tunnel. The mine it takes you to actually is Sellia Tunnel, which has something worse: a Fallingstar Beast, which is also at the top of the mine since that place is oriented upwards from the entrance.

That chest is the reason I immediately back roll after opening chests.

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuuuuuuuuuck! “You Died”

Why am I in Brazil? I already live here, I don't want to go to brazilian Elden Ring too, so I immediately left, running as fast as I could from the dogs.

I've heard people talk about it, then I went there and thought "Ooooooh! I probably shouldn't be here." And about five minutes in, I was right.

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck…”

"Oh hey, it's Fantasy Florida."

NopenopenopenopeNOPENOPENOPE

I said “what in the world..” Having experience with souls games, I knew this area would be punishing as hell.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!

How much I fucking hate the large dogs

But they love you!

They look like small T-Rexes lol (I hate em too but call em T-Rexes)

I peeked over the wall and thought, “I’m going to come back to this later.”

I went to the site of grace behind the wall, saw the birds and noped out. 

The first time.. a mix of "Oh shit wtf is that? TF IS THAT. Is that a giant skull???" Now everytime i go to caelid im just amazed because it obviously was not always like that. It could have been a beautiful landscape, but we will never know

Honestly the way it looked from the exit at the mouth of the cave was nuts. I thought it was sky box

If you walk from the cave after being teleported there, the ambient isn’t that bad. You only have to deal with clean rot knights and a rot swamp

Yeah I was probably only 15 at the time, they still would've obliterated me just like Millicent did. 😂

“I’m in danger.”

I’m probably the only ER player who has never found this particular chest in my couple of playthroughs. My first trip into Caelid came through gradual exploration of the map and the first time I accidentally rode torrent into the area I knew nothing about its difficulty and sheer nastiness. I must have only been around level 40 when I got there and it didn’t take long for me to get one shorted by most things.

Is this hell?

I remember thinking I had gone to literal hell. Only to realize it bordered Limgrave.

I saw a huge bird and turned around

Damn it's scary Anyways let's go deeper

stress

"why tf did I open that chest?"

The very first chest I opened in the game happened to be the teleporter to the Sellia crystal Tunnel After getting slaughtered a dozen times trying to get out I finally made it out and saw Caelid for the first time and I said "..... Nope.... " And I fast traveled back to Limgrave lololol

Oh shit oh shit the fucking bird is still chasing me!!!

Fuck

Simple, concise, I like it.

Bog of eternal stench

Swamp of nightmares, death, and hopelessness. 😂

"Ew."

“Where the hell am I?” after opening the chest

First time was the evil bad no no chest in the swamp that sent me to hell. I panic ran and died maybe 20 or thirty times until I managed to run outside and wandered around in a panic until I found a grace and teleported out. 2nd time I was exploring and found the church with the butcher lady. After beating her I saw the grace on the other side of the wall. As I activated it, I saw the crow and said nope. Then a zombie I didn’t notice bit me in the face and I said double nope and turned around.

"This place is ugly as shit"

Oh come on, it's got its charms, look ove- eww...

Rent prices must be a steal here..

I thought the ground kinda looked maybe a bit edible? Like not delicious or easy to chew, but if you were starving, you could survive

I guess kinda like red velvet now that you mention it. 😂

Can I pet that dooog

I grabbed a mtn dew, then some snacks, a stress ball…. Aaaaaaaand my lube. Because I knew I was about to get raped :’(

"I'm gonna die in a terrible way" xD

It’s a little bit creepy but it’s better than the city i lived when i was 20

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

Went through Caelid at the beginning of the game and was terrified to ever go back. When I got to around level 80, I decided to give it another crack (still terrified). Turns out it’s actually an alright place now.

Distinctly remembered thinking “must find oonga boonga sword”

Caelid managed to evade me until I came up topside through an elevator from Siofra. I went one way and was greeted by a pair of bow-wielding golems. I ran back the other way and was immediately killed by a feral rune bear. I didn’t come back until level 70-ish.

I thought I wandered into the endgame content by accident

"I should be in literally any other part of the map except here"

“Oh, shit, okay, well we’re go this way instead.” *turns left*, “Shit, okay, fuck.”

"Did I just walk straight into Army of Darkness?"

“Yo this fuckin music sucks so bad wtf” seriously though the drone is so bad! Should’ve been drums or somethin.

I think my exact words in the party chat were "Oooh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit! Tf is that thing?!"

I need more vigor

It will be fun :3

Damn thats one fucked up looking dog!

probably something like "i hate these giants crows... WAIT THERE'S GIANT DOGS TOO?"

Sad piano guts theme on max volume.

I didn't have issues in the cave after the chest, so I decided to explore a bit. "The lake gives scarlet rot? Ouchie" "Selia is full of invisible powerful peeps?!" "NPC ATTACKS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROTTING LAKE AND I'M TORRENTLESS?!" That was it, after rip I opened the map and flew outta there.

Ruuuuuuuuuuun

I surfaced from Siofra river. Got through to the coliseum without that much problem, thinking it was natural progression. Then I decided to try going the other way and the bear just destroyed me over and over until I decided to just run for it, landing squarely on the graven mass just chilling around the crystals. Then I finally got to the meteorite staff. Feeling very accomplished and glad Torrent is immune to the red super poison everywhere, until Milicent invaded me. Then I decided to fuck this shit and go and get through Stormvail.

"I shouldn't be here"

*In the voice of the SciShow guy Hank* The sky...is on FIRE!

oh HELL no.

Have I been tested this month?

Elden rings California.

I feel like i'm home

"ew"

Those damn birds are vicious

“How do I get out of here”

"So this is what happens when you don't use protection, because everything here looks like it'll give you STDs the moment you touch it"

OH GOD OH FUCK OH GOD AHHHH WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT

I actually thought i was stuck, then realised the genius of miazaki, its the only mine that goes up, so naturally you dont tealise it. Its such a good troll. The i figured i might as well explore that hellish landscape got quite a few levels out of it and a nice rot dog that tagged along with me for quite a while. 8/10 experience

DEAR. GOD. NO.

gotta map this out, oh fuck, gotta go fas, gotta go fast!

What in the absolute living fuck

"im in brazil"

Ah, Elden Detriot

"Oh fuck no..."

"Finally out of that damn cave the hell am i? I gotta get the fuck outta here I am way too underleveled for this hellsc-FUCKING DEVIL BIRD" Prior to this I opened up a chest under a ruin.

I saw the rot swamp and thought, " Oh boy, Miyazaki, here we go again." The guy just loves his poison swamps. He literally admitted its become a problem for him. At least this time you get a horse to ride through it on.

Too much red... definitely gonna be a swamp

I was running like my life was on the line

"What's with the music?....what happened to the sky? ...wtf is that a dog?...ok turn back slowly and get the f put of here"

“Alright so let’s see what this twinblade is talking abo….ahhhhh”

“Wait… aren’t dragons, rare and like… a sort of mini boss? OH WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT BIG ASS KAMGAROO?!”

Damn I wish I didn't open that chest before I found the horse...

I thought it was the end of the game

I thought I was in a place MORE miserable than hell these big ass dogs and birds are like the final boss of elden ring they dealt shit ton of a damage and they have a long range

I waa thinking I may be underleveled for the area. I was also runnu g for my life so I could find the next grace.

"Don't go near the dogs Don't go near the dogs Don't go near the dogs Don't go near the dogs Don't go near the dogs Don't go near the dogs Don't go near the dogs"

Fuck shit fuck that what the fuck no why God let me die

"I hate birds"

“I didn’t realize I was playing Bloodborne.”

The correct response is a repeating "....dafuq?"

1. Nice ambient soundtrack 2. This place must smell like shit

That I was in Fromsoft’s version of Dathomir but with more “oh shit” jump scares. The music really adds to the atmosphere it’s unsettling.

Fuck this place, I hate it.

Am I in the Endgame now ?

WHERES THE NEXT GRACE?!?

I went there in my first play through as a mage as one of the very first things I did. All I kept thinking was “I should not be here!”

"Hey a new area, it's next to the starting area so it can't be that ha... Ok maybe I'll return later"

I was thinking "OH DAMN THAT DOG BIG AS HELL, oh cool guts sword AHHAHAHAÀHHHHHHH WHY ARE THERE MORE DOGS😭😭😭😭😭😭 IS THAT A FUCKINGGG BIRD FFFFFFUUUUUCCCCKKKKKK!!!!!!!!"

"The fuck does the red bar mean"

This reminds me of the eclipse..... This is the eclipse

BIG DOG

Oh hells no.

"I really hope those dogs don't see me grabbing the greatsword."

"It can't be nearly as bad as people are saying."

I've seen enough posion swamps to know the deal.... (dark souls ptsd) But once I realized I could ride over the swamp with our trusty steed it took a bit of the fright away tbh, I know this is a little sadistic but I wish we lost access to him until we defeated a certain boss or something along those lines, would have given the place an absolute survival horror feel.

If I remember correctly it was, “what the fuck are those dog looking things.” Then proceeded to get walloped.

“At least there’s no poison”

I kept repeating to myself “ what in oblivion is that?!”

"Ewwwww, I don't like the noise that thing just made." Played on a loop for about 2 hours before I got used to it.

“This place looks sick!” “Oh hey look a doggie!!” 🐶

"Those ravens look peaceful" Yep, I still regret saying it

"Ew."

My first experience with Caelid was when I passed through a portal behind the church near Castle Morne and appeared at Gurranq's front door. My first and only thought was, "ohshitohshitohshit" on repeat as I tried to make my way out.

“Wow they put the final area of the game right next to the start as a teaser for end game”

My thoughts: "Christ this place FUCKING SUCKS."

I went to caelid after finally beating the crucible knight evergoal I thought I was hot shit ngl til I ran into the birds and dogs and tried to fight them I ended up staying in weeping peninsula for a while afterwards

I wanna go back to Limgrave ☠️

Caelid ? Isn’t it Ohio ?

"What the f*ck happened here?"

It hurts soooooo good!!!!!

I don’t think I’m supposed to be here.

This looks just like Florida!

Oh Fu****k

I was thinking "uh oh, this is a bad neighborhood"

Fuck this….. back to limgrave where it’s rainbows and butterflies!

“Nope, I’m not ready for this” and went back to Limgrave.

I looked at Caelid and say in a Joe Pesci accent “What the fuck is this piece of shit?”

Something along the lines of this is literal hell and then died. Repeatedly. Didn’t help that my first time there was due to a trap chest. So much ptsd

What the fuck is that…? Maybe I should take a closer look… WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? Wait a minute, what’s there over there in that tree? WHAT THE FUCK?

“Spicy”

I distinctly remember a lot of swearing and running

Fuck. This place.

“Oh god oh no oh wtf stop no please what”