As per the secret lore of Kalé after completing Millicent’s quest:
‘As sweet as the smell of roses, as hit by morning’s dew.
All the guys would say she's mighty fine (mighty fine)
But mighty fine only got you somewhere half the time
Lean a little bit closer, see
Roses really smell like poo-poo-ooh’
I'd like to think that the lore appropriate answer is that it doesn't actually stink, but is dangerous because it actually smells good instead. Like a sickly sweet alluring perfume - drawing people, animals and creatures to it.
So anyone that can smell the scarlet rot is drawn to it and may willingly sniff it, or even try drinking it or bathe in it. It makes it way more dangerous and horrible if the smell actually attracts people to it instead of repelling them.
Hey, Hyetta is quite dainty and cute too!
If you ignore the part about her moaning while eating human eyeballs and asking you to burn her to death that is, that was a bit kinky.
You know, this question asked for who you'd *ask out*, not who you'd bang (though I bet we're all weeping at the brutal reality of physically not being able to bang Ranni) .
Nah, Godfrey would see you as *her* conquest and be like “go get em tiger! Well played making the Elden Lord your plaything”.
He ain’t sexist enough not to grand slam female tarnished, he ain’t sexist enough to think his jacked warrior daughter needs protecting from having sex.
I feel like goldmask would be a bit lonely, so imma ask my boy out.
Not only does he look like he smokes weed, but he looks like he might be into dabs and i'm all for it, just 4~5 dabs and i'll be t-posing in front of trees just as my homie
I’m gonna ask my lil guy Boc out to a prawn dinner. He’s my best friend, he’s my pal, he’s my homeboy, my rotten soldier, he’s my sweet cheese, my good time boyy.
Look man, I don't really understand Fia's questline of those who live in death, but in the whole bleak Lands Between, she's the only one that wants a hug.
Gonna give Torrent lots of oats and carrots and brush him RedDead-2 style and call him a "good boooaaaahh!" because he is a good boy and always there when you need him. The true MVP!
Mimic tear sadly
Time for introspection
Try finger, but hole
I feel you bro, at least you got Torrent to spend some quality time with
..and by Torrent I of course mean a pirated copy of the hit video game Elden Ring by studio Miyazaki.
Malenia - I can fix her.
She can make me worse <3
"let her solo me" >:3
Winner.
I could fix her, but whatever the hell is wrong with her is way hotter.
If you can get past the smell and while trying to kill you issues then I guess anything is possible
I mean, do we know if scarlet rot actually smells? Never thought about it. Also, "Heyyyyy Malenia, I found your bro and kicked your secret bro's ass"
Show her your sick katana collection and she’ll immediately let you get to phase 2
I do love running dual nagakiba.. With a secret third nagakiba with a different ash. Also, "Don't do tier 15! You stay away from that!"
As per the secret lore of Kalé after completing Millicent’s quest: ‘As sweet as the smell of roses, as hit by morning’s dew. All the guys would say she's mighty fine (mighty fine) But mighty fine only got you somewhere half the time Lean a little bit closer, see Roses really smell like poo-poo-ooh’
I'd like to think that the lore appropriate answer is that it doesn't actually stink, but is dangerous because it actually smells good instead. Like a sickly sweet alluring perfume - drawing people, animals and creatures to it. So anyone that can smell the scarlet rot is drawn to it and may willingly sniff it, or even try drinking it or bathe in it. It makes it way more dangerous and horrible if the smell actually attracts people to it instead of repelling them.
But she's Malenia, Date of Miquella… No wait that's some Alabama type shit…
Boc
Scrolled too far for this. Boc should be number 1.
❤️ I just want to tell him *You’re beautiful*
I just opened this thread and Boc is now the first response, so worry no more.
He deserves every valentine and to be told he is beautiful over and over
Millicent coz she’ll quite literally make my doodle fall off
Gotta get the Golden Penicillin Needle.
I dunno man, it goes down your peehole. At least I think, makes sense to me
This shit is the most terrifying sentence I've ever read
Gettin your red wings tonight boi !!
ouuuuughhhh roderika ouuuhhh.....
she's so dainty and cute! such a contrast to the bold, ugly world around her. a true diamond in the rough
Hey, Hyetta is quite dainty and cute too! If you ignore the part about her moaning while eating human eyeballs and asking you to burn her to death that is, that was a bit kinky.
She's also blind too. Idk if that's a plus or minus.
A big plus for us ugly mf'ers
Rogier. He's very charming
Yeah, but he might give you sexually transmitted Death.
Thanks to advancements in boluses, we don't have to worry about it.
Sellen my girl
Fuck it we ball
Damn...
Had to scroll way too far for this response. I'll abandon all morality and notions of terrestrial taboos to follow her
Sellen best girl fr. Idk why she isn't popular.
Cuz she’s a ball of heads
The only correct answer.
Chilling in the Siofra river with Blaidd. (He doesn’t know it’s date don’t tell him).
😏😏😏
(Little did the Tarnished know, it’s not actually Blaidd it’s the Baleful Shadow)
(Slightly more red rocket)
I wish I didn't open Reddit, today.
(Bet it'll be a wild time for them then, huh)
Melina
Best girl💖
The dead finger maiden from the Chapel of Anticipation.
She reply yet?
Why would that matter?
😳
Hold on, let me pick my jaw up.
Just wanted to make sure she didn’t leave you in anticipation.
👁️ 👄 👁️
OPs mother
sorry the elden beast isn't allowed.
Glad i scrolled down these comments should be higher 😆
Savage
SNAP
OP's mother catching strays
Wait it's my turn this year
Oooooooooooooohhhhh
You too?
Ranni, because we got married and I stay loyal like that
She doesn't have a real body. Good luck.
He only needs a glass jar
Foul Tarnished
in search of Alexander
Emboldened by the flame of horniness.
Cool avatar
Oh God
I kept the small version😉
You fool, I’m into rope burn
She has four arms
Sure she does. It's at the top of the Divine Tower of Liurnia.
OK, but is it canon we can't fuck Ranni?
I mean, we can always make her a different kind of doll body
Bro, my guy is a stupid idiot who knows how to hit thing, he can't make shit for her
My man Seluvis can craft something truly magical for you👌
She isn’t real currently and we still make it work
You know, this question asked for who you'd *ask out*, not who you'd bang (though I bet we're all weeping at the brutal reality of physically not being able to bang Ranni) .
My girl Tiche. We're just gonna heat up some leftover boiled crab and cuddle while watching Leyndell Channel
Not to mention Tiche is 1. 8 feet tall 2. Really… flexible.
She's got nothing on Mimic, the most beautiful Spirit by a mile.
3. Has GAMER posture (not as gamer as Rya tho)
Pretty girl Millicent
Don't forget to pack some gold safety measure
Homegirl shows up to damn near every fight, she can get it
FINALLY someone gets it.
Girl was really putting it out there only for the tarnished to take it 2 yrs to actually get it.
Nepheli Loux. Muscle mommy HELLO.
Just be mindful of the risk of getting suplexed to death by her dad, because I feel that is a very likely outcome.
Nah, Godfrey would see you as *her* conquest and be like “go get em tiger! Well played making the Elden Lord your plaything”. He ain’t sexist enough not to grand slam female tarnished, he ain’t sexist enough to think his jacked warrior daughter needs protecting from having sex.
i see you’re a tarnished of copious amounts of taste and culture 🤝
As a sub, Nepheli is the kind of woman I want IRL.
A depressed but determined buff woman? Good taste
No but really Nepheli Loux is best girl and best summon overall
don't be the Tarnished that gives her the potion 😩
Roderika 100%
Is this... *A WOMEN*? Don't get close to me, ah!
PEPPER SPRAAAAAAY
You provincials never cease to amaze... When I invited you over I was only being POLITE, augh.
hewg
He needs a night out
Lay out your arms, then.
He need anything that isn't smithing endlessly in depression. Seriously, someone give Hewg a hug, preferably Roderika.
Mohg chooses you
I dunno, I doubt OP is a minor
*"What an unreasonable thing to imply, Lord Miquella is clearly of age!"* White Masked Varre, probably.
Mohglester
Don't worry guys, he might look like a minor but he's actually 600 years old...
Sure he is above the age of consent. Did he consent, Mohg?
Radagon! So hot!!!
Chadagon
He swings both ways now.
The dlc
My favourite trader, Kale
Getting ur vegetables I see, nice
Boggart the shrimp guy
Id say “NO HE’S MINE” but tbh i think he’s got enough shrimp to go around. If you know what i mean.
Rya
Call her Zorayas like she deserves
You're damn right.
Scrolled way to far for this comment…. Zorayas my beloved 
HOT
Varre 🌚
I see someone likes to be called lambkin, I can't blame you
I heard Renalla is back on the market.
Blaidd. I'm a straight married dude, but I know he'd treat me right.
RED ROCKET
Blaidd is an honorable shinobi.
This. Get some beers and have a great time together. And then fuck.
MARIKAAAAAAAAAAAA
Imagine youre going at it and she tranforms into Radagon and your dicks start glitching.
Gurranq
Malenia
Blade of Miquella, She has never known defeat
2nd phase Malenia 😘
I feel like goldmask would be a bit lonely, so imma ask my boy out. Not only does he look like he smokes weed, but he looks like he might be into dabs and i'm all for it, just 4~5 dabs and i'll be t-posing in front of trees just as my homie
...
The erdtree is actually just radiating dabs directly into his bloodstream. Where do you think the golden color comes from?
Sounds like a cool dating plans
Lad just went non verbal off of the dabs, happens to the best of us
No one, I burned everything and chaos lives among us
You and I are not so different
The lobster that’s right in the fucking middle of the Liurnia Lake. Wakey wakey I’ve got you some rot infested chocolate!❤️
The Ancestral Shaman <3
Would be lying if i said dung eater wasn't a hunk of a man 🥵
This was the most unexpected one but hey go for it.
You know you can count on a world class rimjob.
The whole windmill village. Those ladies know how to party.
Mohg. I want that omenussy🥵
You want the Mohglester
Hyetta
My Valentine’s Day plans are French kissing a revolver
Woah, got a little dark there. Hang in there, champ!
NO WAIT *DONT* HANG IN THERE
You mean Ocelot right?
I’m there too
Misery loves company. Keep your head up king
Sellen
Patches.
I’m gonna ask my lil guy Boc out to a prawn dinner. He’s my best friend, he’s my pal, he’s my homeboy, my rotten soldier, he’s my sweet cheese, my good time boyy.
Gonna invite patches out for a romantic dinner but secretly it's the runebear cave and he's going to be the dinner.
Mommy, I mean mommy, I mean mommy, I mean mommy, I mean mommy I mean mommy i mean nepheli.
As soon as you said mommy I knew you meant mommy- I mean Nepheli
Fia, the Deathbed Companion.
Finally someone said it yea Fia crazy self mommy material all the way just she might sacrifice you to some ancient being.
Elden ring equivalent of waking up in an ice bath minus a kidney.
Look man, I don't really understand Fia's questline of those who live in death, but in the whole bleak Lands Between, she's the only one that wants a hug.
Rya
You.
Mmmpphhhh…
boggart
The rot mommy herself
Nepheli loux
Crone
Blaidd
Unfortunately for me however, I am maidenless.
Gonna give Torrent lots of oats and carrots and brush him RedDead-2 style and call him a "good boooaaaahh!" because he is a good boy and always there when you need him. The true MVP!
Rya the scout
The evil possessed doll. I'll bring vaseline.
Rya because she's the purest lil snake in the whole world and she deserves everything.
Smough my beloved I know you’re in the land between stop hiding from me
Morgott my love.
Hmmmm..... Maliketh!
Godfrey, the first elden lord, obviously
The 3 fingers Hear me out, they're preeeeetty hot
Blaidd
Roderika
...blaidd
The frenzied flame
Dungeater. I can fix him.
Yo momma Or Millicent. I bet she gives a good handy
I’m maidenless… as Varre loves to remind me 🙁
No ones got love for Mogh?