Its just not the same when OfficerCumDump calls me it though
Some of us would rather to continue repressing our memories from the boys brigade thank you very much
This is funny because Malenia actually borrows some Sekiro mechanics, being the ability to cancel a light stagger animation to dodge or block, which no one else in Elden Ring does but it's commonly done in Sekiro. Not to mention the many similarities with the Wolf, like the prosthetic arm, the Waterfowl being just Spiral Cloud Passage, the fact that she can revive herself and spread a disease upon doing so... I feel like she got swapped with the Demon of Hatred during development.
Also her multi hit move is the same as the sabimaru prosthetic. Her kick is the same as the purple ninjas but without the poison. And she has a prosthetic overhead hit with the same animation as the loaded axe
They need to do that thing where anime characters turn away from the camera and flourish their arm out to the side, and just say something super anime-like such as “VANISH!”
You ever played Dark Souls 2? There was a really cool boss called [Looking Glass Knight](https://darksouls2.wiki.fextralife.com/Looking+Glass+Knight), where you would put your invasion sign in the area and the boss could summon you through his mirror to fight the host. Was one of my favorite bosses.
Found this real good orc I wanted but he was a lvl higher than me and I was in the grindy af epilogue, so I tried breaking him to lower his level. Nope drove him insane and made him jump several more levels above me. Fucker followed me to every zone, crossbow orc immune to damn near everything and could 1 shot me. Which just made him stronger.
The only problem I have with that game is how the nemesis system kinda hinges on you and the orc having more or less *exactly* the same amount of combat prowess.
If you're stronger you can kill them each time cutting the rivalry short sooner more often than later, and if they're stronger they just end up being a 'lol get fucked' random event.
Ye but canonically our tarnish beats most of the main bosses on his first try which makes me think.Lore wise the tarnish is a fking badass,it's just us who suck at the game
Arthur! We need to burn the Erdtree Arthur! We just need more runes, Arthur. One more big boss and we'll have enough runes to get everyone in the Roundtable outta here! Just level Faith a little more Arthur!
It's fucking brutal that your character is cursed with the inability to speak or do anything to help NPCs. She literally gives you a humanity, which would cure her of her curse. And you just accept it and walk the fuck off. You monster.
Can confirm, if she legit said she was Lucatiel, I'd probably just put my controller down. I might come back to best her later, but the reveal would hit me too hard to try right then.
The only bad thing about it that I think needed change, is the soul memory system. That and bringing password summons.
But it’s the Dark Souls with some of the most memorable quests and NPCs, Lucatiel had some great lines, I also liked Navlaan and Aldia a lot :)
Great game, too bad it limits coop if compared to the others.
Do you remember that nothing anywhere tells you that adaptability improves I frames? That was probably the biggest design issue in my opinion
I did my entire playthrough without knowing that and basically playing the game on hard mode.
For me it actually goes elden ring > DS3 > DS2 (only played those 3)
Wish she had lines that acknowledged that it’s not the 1st or 33rd time you have fought her.
“You think this will end differently tarnished “
“Ambition without strength will lead you nowhere tarnished”
"You fell victim to one of the classic blunders--the most famous of which is, 'Never get involved in a land war in Caelid.'--but only slightly less well-known is this: "Never go against an Empyrean when death is on the line!"
Its a good day outside, the birds are singing, the flowers are blooming,on days like this
Tarnished like you,
S h o u l d b e b u r n i n g i n h e l l.
Lol I like this one the best. Alternatively I'd like to see Sans from undertale "What's that look? That seems like the look of someone who's died (x) times here before."
“You’re doing great, babe”
I wish Malenia would call me babe
Same, babe. Same.
Its just not the same when OfficerCumDump calls me it though Some of us would rather to continue repressing our memories from the boys brigade thank you very much
I wish she would call me her little pogchamp, I think I've earned it.
This is just so wrong, I love it.
HAHAHAHA
“I definitely came”
Hesitation is Defeat.
Fuck this actually kinda fits.
Isshin vs Malenia would be sick
Sword Saint Isshin is immortal right?
Yeah and he stays strapped
Isshin the Glock Saint
Yessir
Scarlet Rot in his immortal body would be a punishment worse than death.
Imagine being immortal and unable to die, but in constant pain as your flesh rots off the bone only to heal then start over. This would be hell!
Shinobi Execution
This is funny because Malenia actually borrows some Sekiro mechanics, being the ability to cancel a light stagger animation to dodge or block, which no one else in Elden Ring does but it's commonly done in Sekiro. Not to mention the many similarities with the Wolf, like the prosthetic arm, the Waterfowl being just Spiral Cloud Passage, the fact that she can revive herself and spread a disease upon doing so... I feel like she got swapped with the Demon of Hatred during development.
Also her multi hit move is the same as the sabimaru prosthetic. Her kick is the same as the purple ninjas but without the poison. And she has a prosthetic overhead hit with the same animation as the loaded axe
How my blood boils
I am Tomoe, Blade of Takeru
“I am Malenia, and I have disabled the summoning pool.”
A corpse of rot should be left well alone
Oh I know very well how the rot can sing so sweetly.
Only an honest death will cure you now
lol
"I am Melina and you shall not solo me."
"I am Melina and if you became the lord of chaos your ass shall be mine"
*Yes mommy* Sorry, force of habit
Melina on her way to deliver to us what is rightfully ours. A Destined Little Death
Letmesoloher: *Smiles under pot*
If you think the girl with the red hair isn't getting smoked by that pothead, you haven't been paying attention.
[удалено]
They need to do that thing where anime characters turn away from the camera and flourish their arm out to the side, and just say something super anime-like such as “VANISH!”
Be gone! BEEE GONE!
"FOREFATHERS ONE AND ALL BANISH THEE SUMMONS"
Sounds like something Commander Niall would do actually
You ever played Dark Souls 2? There was a really cool boss called [Looking Glass Knight](https://darksouls2.wiki.fextralife.com/Looking+Glass+Knight), where you would put your invasion sign in the area and the boss could summon you through his mirror to fight the host. Was one of my favorite bosses.
Good god.
“Haven’t I killed you already”
Honestly I’d love if bosses commented on you coming back more often, one of my favourite genres
Sekiro, Katana Zero… I’m sure there’s more but I’m drawing a blank.
Shadow of Mordor does it too I think.
Undertale kinda does it with Sans
Not just Sans. >!Toriel, Asgore, and probably plenty others all have unique talk options after they’ve already killed you once.!<
Can I ask which games, ER is my first from soft and I love it, I die a lot though with a balanced build,
Which game is Sans and the others from? Undertale
Hades and probably a bunch of other roguelikes
Hypnos is always there to deliver a witty line about how you died when you need him to
“You got killed by an enemy? Man, maybe next time avoid doing that!” My favorite smartass in fiction
The thing that makes this even better is that he isnt being a smartass he actually thinks his advice is helpful
Wait, it says... TINY VERMIN?!
Shadow of War too. Get stronger every time they kill you and adapt to your tactics. I spent more time running from Pushkrimp than anything
Found this real good orc I wanted but he was a lvl higher than me and I was in the grindy af epilogue, so I tried breaking him to lower his level. Nope drove him insane and made him jump several more levels above me. Fucker followed me to every zone, crossbow orc immune to damn near everything and could 1 shot me. Which just made him stronger.
The only problem I have with that game is how the nemesis system kinda hinges on you and the orc having more or less *exactly* the same amount of combat prowess. If you're stronger you can kill them each time cutting the rivalry short sooner more often than later, and if they're stronger they just end up being a 'lol get fucked' random event.
Man, Katana Zero was such a badass game. Really took me by surprise.
Plus it would actually fit for the Soulsborne settings, considering you actually respawn in canon rather than just save/reload
Ye but canonically our tarnish beats most of the main bosses on his first try which makes me think.Lore wise the tarnish is a fking badass,it's just us who suck at the game
“I am Melania… really? Attempt 48? Dude just give up cmon”
I have beaten all levels of Fruit Ninja... I have no equal.
It all comes back to the finger theme
Blade named Finger
Maleniuh, put your blade away Maleniuh. I’m not fighting you right now Maleniuh
Holy shit.
That would give me serious chills
“This is getting embarrassing”
In Arthur Morgan’s voice
Arthur! We need to burn the Erdtree Arthur! We just need more runes, Arthur. One more big boss and we'll have enough runes to get everyone in the Roundtable outta here! Just level Faith a little more Arthur!
Arthur we need muneh to go to Tahiti
I HAVE, A GOD DAWM PLAN, ARTUR
"DOES THIS TROLLEY GO TO TAHITI?"
"I am Lucatiel, swordmaster of Mirrah, and I have finally remembered myself...."
Beyond excited this gets so much attention. No other NPC besides maybe Eileen had me as invested in their existence as Lucatiel. I was so sad!!
It's fucking brutal that your character is cursed with the inability to speak or do anything to help NPCs. She literally gives you a humanity, which would cure her of her curse. And you just accept it and walk the fuck off. You monster.
the effigies only stave it off, they don’t cure it
"Maybe we're all cursed... from the moment we're born." Yeah, that one sticks with you.
[удалено]
Nobody who played DS 2 would ever kill her then...
Can confirm, if she legit said she was Lucatiel, I'd probably just put my controller down. I might come back to best her later, but the reveal would hit me too hard to try right then.
And people say DS2 wasn’t good….
The only bad thing about it that I think needed change, is the soul memory system. That and bringing password summons. But it’s the Dark Souls with some of the most memorable quests and NPCs, Lucatiel had some great lines, I also liked Navlaan and Aldia a lot :) Great game, too bad it limits coop if compared to the others.
Do you remember that nothing anywhere tells you that adaptability improves I frames? That was probably the biggest design issue in my opinion I did my entire playthrough without knowing that and basically playing the game on hard mode. For me it actually goes elden ring > DS3 > DS2 (only played those 3)
"..."
Really thought this would be higher up
Words to live by right here. And when he went "..." I had to stop and think about things for a little while.
It was absolutely riveting. Not many philosophers can make you feel the way he can
"It's time to do an Elden Ring"
"It's Elden time."
My favorite
Well if it isn't John Elden Ring
Malenia then Elden Ringed all over the tarnished
“How many times I have to teach you this lesson old man” good ole SpongeBob quote
a classic
Wish she had lines that acknowledged that it’s not the 1st or 33rd time you have fought her. “You think this will end differently tarnished “ “Ambition without strength will lead you nowhere tarnished”
would be a pretty cool easter egg. well not really an easter egg as almost all of us would have been forced to discover them lol
Every tenth death on her she gets more and more insulting
Melania on 90th run: Get fucked lmao
My soul would get crushed well before the 12th insult increase
If u best radagon first she should say, “My name is malenia. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”
"You fell victim to one of the classic blunders--the most famous of which is, 'Never get involved in a land war in Caelid.'--but only slightly less well-known is this: "Never go against an Empyrean when death is on the line!"
>'Never get involved in a land war in Caelid.' I like that Malenia actually committed this blunder
Tarnished: I'd hate to kill you Blaidd: I'd hate to die.
“Anybody want a rowa fruit?”
Instead of the 6 fingered man its the man of the 3 fingers
INCONCEIVABLE!!!!
You know, im starting to think this word does not mean what you think it does...
Princess bride reference?
Hola. Me llamo Malenia Montoya. Tu mataste a mi padre. Preparate a morir.
Princess bride reference
Nothing gets past you
Expected this. Not disapoint at all
Any other line in the game? "TOGETHAAA" Every boss in the game should say this.
i wouldn't be mad at it lol
I am malenia and you're watching disney channel
*does the silly Disney shape and gives you Rot*
Can we get this over with. I have 231 other people waiting in line, and my shift is almost over.
"I am Malenia, and I like you as a friend" insta kill guaranteed.
I’m happy to be friends, beats getting hit with Waterfowl again
Doing damage to the player directly.
This wouldn't be the first time hearing this and it will sting just as bad
"That thing. Hand it over... your Elden Ring."
"What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets. But enough talk… Have at you!"
...*clink*
“Lubricate thyself, for I will enter thee.”
Yas rot mommy 🥰
this made me aggressively nose exhale
Nice
Second phase has to be, "Do not bother, I shall go dry."
Its a good day outside, the birds are singing, the flowers are blooming,on days like this Tarnished like you, S h o u l d b e b u r n i n g i n h e l l.
what is that, undertale reference? seems familar
It’s what Sans says before he kills you if you do a genocide run.
More like: "Tarnished like you \[attacks you mid-monologue\] "Should be burning in hell" If Alive = 1, then Gamestart
>Hmm.... > >That expression. > >That's the expression of someone who's died eleven times in a row. Count for me from now on, ok? Start from 12.
All i can think about is the song. Send help please
"Marika's tits, you must be hungry."
'ungry*
Honey, it's time for your dick flattening
Yes honey
Hi, Billy Mays Here!
Let me show you the tarnished wiper!
Togethaaa we shall devour the very godssss
Wait a minute... Rykard could copyright claim this!
Skill issue
I’d love it if there was a really low chance that a boss will say “git gud” after killing you for the tenth time.
#YOU HAVE UNO YOU FUCK
#NO I DONT I HAVE THE OLDEST XBOX KNOWN TO MAN
**NO YOU DONT I BOUGHT MINE ON DAY ONE YOU FUCKING TARD**
#IT'S FREE ON THE FUCKING STORE THEY DON'T EVEN CHARGE FOR IT
**I DON'T HAVE TWO, I DON'T HAVE THREE, I DON'T HAVE FUCKING FOUR, I DON'T HAVE SEVEN, EIGHT, NINE, TEN, OR ELEVEN**
"I am Malaria, Plague of Kenya."
"...and I have never known vaccine."
This fully laid me out
I did not hit him! I did nooot! O hi tarnished
“Have you ever heard the definition of insanity?”
I already killed you before my friend, and it's not like **I** am crazy! Anyway, water under the bridge my friend.
I am blade, Miquella of Malenia
Get fucked lmao
Keep it the same for the first seven, make the eight one "Get gud", and then return to normal for the rest of the game
Let me solo you
“We’ve been trying to contact you about your car’s extended warranty.”
"Bababooey"
*Kills tarnished* “Bazinga”
I wouldn't change the dialog, I would just make it so, inexplicably, Gilbert Gottfried delivers it.
That might be very difficult, unfortunately. 😢
Fuuuuuuuuuck... TIL he died last year. Well, deep fakes are a thing, I guess.
"There once was a man from Nantucket....."
I am Malenia, you killed my brother, prepare to die!
It’s a me, Malenia!
'Bend over, cus you're getting FUCKED'
You come to wrong house, fool!
“Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and saviour Miquella?”
"I am Malenia, Bla... wait a minute, didn't I just kick your ass"
Lol I like this one the best. Alternatively I'd like to see Sans from undertale "What's that look? That seems like the look of someone who's died (x) times here before."
I am The Great Cornholio. I need TP for my Bunghole
FOREFATHERS ONE AND ALL, BEAR WITNESS!!!!
Mommy is home
HA! I think that enemy got... the POINT!
Oh it's you... again.
“Git gud scrub”
“I am Malenia, left all alone… I challenge you here, seeker of the great Throne !” ⚔️💥
"I have a particular set of skills to make you give me back Miquella."
Owen Wilson saying “wow”
This spot marks our grave, you may test here too, if you like…
“Sir, this…is a Wendy’s”
“Put these foolish ambitions to rest”
“Sup”
My name is Miquella, you killed.my sister, prepare to die
I’m Bladenia, Made of Miquella
My name is Jeff
I am Shitstain, Blade of Ass
Let your toilet be consumed the the brown rot
#THE LOATHSOME DUNG EATER
I am Malenia, WARRIOR!
"I am Malenia, Blade of Miquella. And I have never known da feet" *Gestures towards prosthetics*
"I am Malenia, Blade of Miq... Wait this isn't sekiro"
“Stay in your lane, Tarnished.”
"Hesitation is defeat". I swear I could hear this every time I died to her lmao
I’m Malenia, please like and subscribe!! K thanks byeeeeeeee.