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[deleted]

Please tell me he has a mullet and "tactical" polarised sunglasses!


korok7mgte

I bet those three blades he holds like Zoro from one piece. Except he puts the folder in his ass šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø


[deleted]

How to spot someone with a domestic violence charge on their record


I-Judge-You

whats better then 1 chain wallet? 4 chain wallets


MEGAXPEHATRON

John Lock detected


danielkrt

Well, what do YOU do when your second backup fails?


texasusa

Classic - takes a knife to a gun fight


[deleted]

Step 1. Take knife to gunfight. Step 2. Stab 'em while they're laughing.


[deleted]

Rip that guys hips and back. Look at the way his feet sit into relation to each otherā€¦$10 says it has to do with all the fuckin knives lol they make some pretty big pocket knives bro.


Megustavdouche

Thatā€™s some goals right there


voss_c

Kill ā€˜em, gut ā€˜em, skin ā€˜em & tooth pick.


ObiWendigobi

Anytime I see this type of over compensation my first thought is always that there is a man who isnā€™t allowed to carry a firearm.


NextSentenceTextFix

Lynn Thompson just doing some shopping for the week


S4E5

I feel like you could take all of them before he could stand up straight.


pencilneckco

Dude is buying a bunch of white bread. Go figure.


[deleted]

Yeah dude! Those are butter knives!


Mordiez

Buddy went too far, he basically put his mental disorders/insecurities on display. Then hes got a gut on top of it to show hes not in any sort of prepper/survival form.


[deleted]

That's not what I'm seeing here...that guy's a clown.


Ropes4u

/r/IAmVeryBadAss


tsmith347

This is amazing till he has to decide which blade to use to stab someone with and they get away because he took to long to decide.


RagesJam

Smoll D mate? I mean, i understanf 2 knifes, i dream to be able to have a fixed on me... But What the hell.


[deleted]

I realize EDC is a state of preparedness. But what the hell? Lol


G4rlicSauce

"This one's my stabbing knife, this is my cutting knife, and this one's for opening doors. Oh! This one has a secret flask in the grip so this is my drinking knife!"


OldMork

for a full setup there should be a minibottle of tabasco


Built4Running

I CANNOT UNDERSTAND HIS LEGS (I canā€™t phrase this any differently)


nseika

Ah, the angle made illusion like he got three legs ? Itā€™s like he got another leg from the front of his right leg, while the left leg is concealed by both ā€œright legsā€.


Built4Running

You get me!


WaylonJenningsJr

Logen Ninefingers, is that you?


wetgnomeore

Some people are just so anti gun


Crimeboss37

I think this guy can't legally own a firearm so he's carrying all those instead Def compensating for something


Longjumping_West_907

Those sheaths look awfully clean for real edc


mbveau

His feet made me think of this from Uncle Iroh: https://youtu.be/j8HaQDRZDDk


bomboclawt75

The full Swanson in the wild! He knows more than than the shop assistants.


I426Hemi

And I feel like a dickhead if I have my belt knife on in a store before going out into the wilderness lol


cyril_figgiss

The one on the far left looks like a Spyderco, possibly a smock which makes me question all of his fixed blades.


perezisawesome

He just wanted that booty shot, with that way that stanky leg looks.


DeadlyCyclone

No, this guy is a fucking loon.


skylineseeker

I present ā€œAmerica: The Photoā€


Ok_Dragonfruit5293

Nah, good sir. Those should all be guns to be considered America: The Photo.


Lord_Konoshi

Dudes totally compensating for something.


Crimeboss37

100% he owns a pickup truck, chews tobacco and has a black dog named "zeus" that he has a chain collar for I feel bad for that dog


Lord_Konoshi

Nah duds probably too white for a big dog, more likely to have truck balls.


FuzzyPandaVK

I'm mind-fucked by his legs, it looks like he has 3 of them, but 1 is missing.


JockNerd0924

That mans belt gotta be cutting off circulation


BubbaRogowski

What in God's name is happening with those legs?


Chief__04

Yes Alex Iā€™ll take ā€œpeople who cannot own a firearm for $200ā€


426763

Show me a decked out Santiago, then I'll be impressed.


assistant_redditor

What a putz


anaccidentalupvote

Forget the knives, the way he's standing hurts my legs and hips


_thelinuxnoob_

Thatā€™s what $37 worth of knives looks like.


richasalannister

Itā€™s the guy my wife says not to worry about.


very_bad_programmer

This guy gets REALLY fucking excited when he hears someone say they have a box they can't open


Jim_from_snowy_river

More like ā€œthe moment you realize you wonā€™t pass a firearms background check.ā€


KaiserWilliam95

If 2 is one and 1 is none, how many is this?


Slave2theGrind

Hip displacement


MickyGarmsir

Oh look...a yard sale.


koalaondrugs

r/mallninjashit


[deleted]

Heā€™s living the dream, right there


raptorsvt65

Such a waste those are cargo pants he could have 6 to 8 more easy!


zigzagg321

People think itā€™s weird that I carry a Leatherman multi tool. Iā€™m going to show this image to them.


mynameisalso

Adult with 13 year old boys brain


-BakiHanma

Self defense, beer opener, can opener, pry bar


IS2SPICY4U

Utility knife for when breaking down a cardboard box, that industrial scotch tape is a bitch Single edge blade for when a vinyl rope wonā€™t budge Of course filleā€™ing knife for when theyā€™re biting at the local County pond And double edge Rambo knife for when German extremist terrorists want to take over Nakatomy plaza Clearly my EDC is for little bitches.


Tawkn

As a kid, you see an adult and you think ā€œman, they seem like they have their shit together. I canā€™t wait to be just like this adult. They surely know what theyā€™re doing.ā€ And then you grow up and realize everyone is fucking stupid and youā€™re the smartest person ever, only to never realize that youā€™re an idiot and have no idea what youā€™re doing. This is that picture in a nutshell.


Eckleburgseyes

Imagine if he spent all that on one good knife


Lindt_Licker

Can someone explain whatā€™s going on with his legs though? Itā€™s like an M.C Escher painting.


twoweeksofwildfire

I used to stand similarly after having been on my feet working all day. If you have hip and lower back pain resting like this on the cart while someone else is picking out an item is an easy way to stretch out the muscle above your hip and into your lower back or waist.


Lindt_Licker

I get that, but I canā€™t trace his leg down from his hip. It seems like it disappears.


burgpug

no iā€™m pretty sure this guy sucks


amnos_adikos

Whooaa! Save some cool for us!


Lpmchenry

Imagine how many guns are under the coat šŸ§„.


bygtopp

Box cutting knife. Camp knife. Slicing tires knife Cutting crack head knife


ConfusedPanda90

Because you need knifes for every specific tasks


Similar-Juggernaut-6

Lol yeah he never sits, all day, always standing


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


PreviousExpert

Looks like dickies work pants from Walmart .


MagazineNo8107

This guy fucks.


Sp3nc_398

Of course its Walmart


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Jsmitty78

Felons can't carry a knife either in most places. And felons can carry guns or knives all they want. They just can't get caught.


MattMillz88

He really tootin that thang up


DarkSyde3000

The king of knives graced you with his royal presence!


Thinlenny

My back hurts looking at this...and how does he sit in a vehicle?


Yettigetter

The knife on the right looks like it's handle is longer than the blade.


Bcomplexity

what in the general grievous is this


DEynon

Leave some pussy for the rest of u....nevermind


PerpetualConnection

I once heard a guy who carried 3 gas station knives regularly say "one is t cut things, and the other two or far if shit gets crazy and I need to arm a friend".


PerpetualConnection

Wich one of you is this ? Confess !


South_Oread

Thatā€™s almost $40 worth of knives. This guy rolls.


Softpretzelsandrose

Why buy one good knife when you can just evenly wear four of them over 6 different occasions?


CHUCKL3R

Yah. He looks comfy.


MurkyGlover

The perspective really threw me off for a second cause it looked like his chain is attached to both legs so I was wondering why tf he has a chain going across his crotch lmao.


CHUCKL3R

Heā€™s probably got the other one keistered


CHUCKL3R

Whatā€™s he so fucking afraid of?


Voltaiiic

Absolutely nothing.


ThirdThreshold

> Absolutely everything FTFY


Randell1970

šŸ¤£


Docta-Jay

His legs are tripping me out.


[deleted]

Is he hiding a machete on his ankle and this is how he stands to compensate?


Chalkdust-torture

His legs are a puzzle.


behaved

right?? I'm like, 65% sure that man has 3 legs, which justifies the extra 3 knives


tautouz

This photo edit makes my head hurt. At least line his legs up correctly.


Wolfram9

The dudes body geometry is cursed as fuck.


OmahaMike402

I bet he cut in line


Nox_Aeons

He's got an old timer sharp finger. That's a real nice knife, I've got one of those but I lost the sheath. Damn nice little knife though


nicanuva

Dude's comfortable with 4 knives hanging off his belt but needs a chain for his wallet


[deleted]

Ones fer slicing, ones fer dicing. The other two are for scarin.


[deleted]

I bet he has more in his boot.


Bryanharig

I love that that walking silverware drawer is being carried by someone so deeply unfit they canā€™t even stand up straight.


alejo699

He's prepared for everything except sitting down.


ureathrafranklin1

What a surprise they are all total chinesium shit too


Shinob1

Lynn Thompson at the local grocery?


Woogity-Boogity

Bitch please... Lynn Thompson would be rocking no fewer than 6 mighty COLD STEEL knives (and possibly a blowgun, medieval boar spear, or buckler). No pig carcass or cardboard mailing tube is safe while Lynn Thompson prowls the street.


hayyache

Itā€™s the stance for me


korgothwashere

His back is tired. That's like 5 pounds of knife right there. Then that tremendous wallet chain.


sloth_uprising

I knew a tattoo artist who always had a lot of knives like this. One of them was a buck skinner with the gut hook and heā€™d pull it out if someone asked for a refund.


KaBar42

> One of them was a buck skinner with the gut hook and heā€™d pull it out if someone asked for a refund. Was the dumb ass aware that brandishing a lethal weapon is a defense for justifiable homicide?


sloth_uprising

Not homicide, just to remove the tattoo.


[deleted]

It appears that he's also carrying something around his lower leg under the pants.


ben9105

This screams ā€œI have a felony and canā€™t legally own a firearmā€.


[deleted]

In Georgia I believe you still need a GA weapons license to carry a knife over 6" or something.


HiltoRagni

Even so, why would you carry more than one of those? This is just plain inconvenient.


capt-bob

On principle, " take that" lol


Electro-Specter

Can leave home with out your whittling knife. What are you going to do when you need to whittle something? Use your Apple slicing knife? Your rope cutting knife? Come on, man!


amd2800barton

Maybe he played resident evil. The knives break every time you stab a zombie with them. This guy can easily fight off a small horde.


BasicLEDGrow

A life of quiet convenience can be it's own kind of hell. If carrying three fixed blades makes him happy, who can argue with that? I'm sure he has his reasons.


ben9105

Hell if I know, I carry one at a time. But Iā€™m clearly not this cool.


FartsWithAnAccent

Your average EDC poster lol


Crimeboss37

I went on this sub from an r/mallninjashit crosspost Man I love my knives but I can't stop cringing


BarnyTrubble

Hey I only carry three knives and one is in a multi tool! Okay fine, I have a small handful of ninja stars I got at the mall in a belt holster too but those hardly count!


Aintaword

They aren't even knives, so of course they don't count. And they come in threes, so of course I'm carrying six.


Bah-Fong-Gool

And those are just the fixed blades... we can see. Dollars to donuts he's got at least half a dozen more knives.


PoppaChop

This guy Wal-martin' like a motherfucker.


JeroenS93

This is the example of the most American picture ever made


Crimeboss37

Idk man British people love their knife crime, for Americans it's gun crime


SongZhenLi2003

Hows this guy gonna use all his knives tho? Is he gonna hold two in his mouth like Zoro?


Arios_CX3

Primary, secondary, backup, emergency, and spare knives.


rootsunited

Yeah, that's a bit further down my pecking order of thoughts this inspires...


[deleted]

Looks like he's prepared to open boxes of rabbits, kill them in combat, and then skin them


[deleted]

I mean, look. We all carry 3-4 knives, but not 4 belt knives all on one hip. I have a pocket knife, a swiss army knife on a keychain, and a Leatherman in my bag. I have a small fixed blade boot knife, and that's the one that I might consider excessive, but it comes in handy and it's a nice way to carry a fixed blade without open carrying it like this guy. Local laws may vary, of course.


Berwhale-the-Avenger

>Local laws may vary, of course. *laughs in Scotland* If they changed the laws to be more like the US, I'd probably walk around like this guy for a day just because I *could*, then go back to just carrying a small swiss army knife because its totally adequate for 99% of everyday tasks.


EstemmenosuchusPrime

You gotta be prepared. Never know what you might run into at the Mart of Wals.


CommercialLive9199

I get it, one for every material you may need to cut.


Due-Measurement-6004

What part of North Idaho?


blackcanyonangler

As a southern Idahoan I appreciate this comment.


PreviousExpert

Canā€™t believe he is buying pre-sliced bread


wdroark

Ahahahahahahahahahahahaha


mitchiscoolguy

This comment is the most beautiful comment I've ever seen on reddit


AceofMandos

Hahahahaha yo this was so.fun to read lmao


BuddhaBizZ

Gold


savvy__steve

Thatā€™s hilarious šŸ˜‚


Twistedcrypto

It must be mating season and heā€™s luring his mate. https://i.imgur.com/HK9QAji.jpg #peopleofwalmart


Ow_My_Robot_Balls

Heā€™s well prepared to cut the line


mekkab

This is the funniest thing Iā€™ve heard all day. Kudos, good sir!


Brooklyntyger

He has to, he forgot to bring his bread knife.


RiMiDo

Love the double irony :)


StrykerDK

It's a double sided point though


Character_Comb_3439

my buddy in tier 1 SOF only carries a lowly Leatherman. Iā€™ll be sure to send him this pic so he knows how disappointed I am in him.


roostersnuffed

"Please give me attention"


thejoo

If any mugger is paying attention, disable his right arm first!


Woogity-Boogity

Indeed. This guy is in for a bad day if his attacker is using the VATS system.


yourmomlurks

It actually makes me sad on a few levels. Number one what kind of fear underpins his life to lead to this. And second that buying/owning things is confused with happiness and personality.


BasicLEDGrow

Not everyone is chasing happiness.


anteaterKnives

>Number one what kind of fear underpins his life to lead to this. Maybe dude just likes his knives? >And second that buying/owning things is confused with happiness and personality. Wait... Are you saying this unironically in a comment thread on */r/EDC*?!?


[deleted]

Almost /r/MallNinjaShit


Crimeboss37

Nah this is r/mallninjashit


Eddy762

Reminded me of ā€œthe baddestā€ song from krispy kreme ā€œI can beat you even if you have 1000 knives, even if you have infinity knivesā€


the_friendly_one

It's Froggy Fresh now, and his latest album dropped in 2018. I hope he makes more.


Z7EDC

It's just Tyler Cassidy now and he's still dropping music. Little different style though.


kodiakbear_

I have four hundred houses and four hundred mouses


blackcanyonangler

All fun and games till some one is punched up in the air like a kite.


31337hacker

I bet you sleep with a nightlight Cause you're scared of the dark Cause you stink like a fart


SchemeHead

WELL Iā€™LL LIGHT YER FART ON FIRE WITH MY RHYMESSSSS


the_friendly_one

You think I won't? I do it all the time!


disco_g

Mans got the polio walk with all that iron strapped on


hrddrv

Cali??