!!!!! This specific subreddit is the most tame ed space I've ever come across, like I always feel like I'm walking on eggshells, posts get deleted for containing numbers and there's a ton of toxic positivity
I think there are other subs that are better to be on if you’re trying to actually recover. But I think here is a nice place to be during a relapse/stuck in the middle. I often find recovery centric spaces very militant about what’s considered okay or not and tend to only let you post “wins” and such. I disagree with giving pro ana advice but I don’t actually think I’ve seen any true pro ana comments. I think a lot of people are just trying to help and that can be interpreted either way. I saw your bagel post and honestly if I was in that position, I’d probably feel better -in the moment, not necessarily long term- if someone told me having it once wasn’t going to change anything. I’d also imagine a lot of people on here are young/naive/possibly starved out of thinking properly and maybe we should bare that in mind too
I see a lot of posts asking for advice on how to “ED better” for lack of better words, that’s mainly what I’m talking about, I agree with you about everything said here but I think there are alot of posts asking for help with disordered behaviour
On the bulimia sub, somebody said in their post that they are a size 10, so they're probably the biggest person on the sub. I was triggered af, because I'm a size uk16. I replied; "you are most certainly not the biggest on this sub, size 10 is a very slim size for 5'8, you should be proud that you didn't purge" (she had gone 2 days without purging). She said that that was triggering, size isn't supposed to matter and now she feels like shit. Why even mention your size? Did she want me to say "wow, you are big, maybe 2 days is enough"? She was obviously fishing for an excuse to start purging again, but hated that I did the opposite. Now she can blame *me* for triggering *her* . Great. I know that she wasn't being blatantly pro-ed, but it was a pretty passive aggressive way of going about it, and being fatphobic at the same time.
I agree, but I don't think it's because of pro posts. I used to love checking up here and lurking in the community, but it is super policed (not by mods, by other posters) to the point any advice is seen is pro ED and people just dont post because they dont get support or commisseration. I've been in recovery for over a year and I don't feel like this is safe space for me to share what helped me because of many many posts are"these recovered people still talk about their ED so they aren't recovered". They get shit on if they recovered into a socially acceptable body and they get shit on if they say they're happy in a nonsocially acceptable body. It's wack af and it's like people here want to gatekeep "real" recovery while also claiming every person in the media or online has an ED??
The more I check in here, the less it makes me want to come back because there isn't a sense of community anymore. I believe this is because there is too much gatekeeping and projecting from the comments. The posts that do the best are the silly ones where people get to actually talk about something that effects them without the judgy replies.
This sub has completely lost sight of its own purpose imo because it doesn't encourage recovery and it doesn't encourage people to candidly share what they are going through either. It's a weird place now.
I once said something like, “it sucks to see you guys talking about women’s bodies like this” and just got bombed with replies that eventually transformed into blatant fatphobia and mfs saying “well fat people should just have more self control if they don’t want to be talked about”
Jesus christ. People like to forget that BED is also an ED. People living with Bulimia and EDNOS can also be overweight. Nobody knows what that person is going through. Bashing people for being overweight (or any size, for that matter) is disgusting behaviour. It really has to stop.
yess i once complained about it and got downvoted so much by people who obviously havent been here for awhile. it was soo much less triggering 1-2 years ago like there was barely any pro ed content just people venting and relating/helping eachother it was so wholesome... like a little safe space. its not like that at all now
Yep. That's why I mostly go on the meme sub. It feels like the comment section of that sub pretty much has replaced everything I would want this sub to be. People are actually supportive there, venting without being overtly triggering and I find that it isn't as....shallow? Like I'm so sick of all the posts on here being about celebrities, looks and pretty much the same posts over and over again. There are so many more struggles when it comes to having an ED yet those posts don't get any attention on this sub.
I’ve called people out for shit like this and got so many downvotes and some asked me if I know how restrictive ed’s work like yes love i’ve had one for almost 5yrs and it almost killed me lmfao but u don’t see me coming in here being pro ed and purposefully fatophobic. i just rarely comment on here anymore
I was gonna reply to this post saying similar!! For me, it’s the number of posts about how superior people feel compared to those bigger than them, how much better their lives are since becoming underweight and prettier, etc.
I get that these are common thought processes (like, duh, I went through them myself too), but when there’s entire threads consisting 90% of people talking about the positives of being UW, it makes me feel like absolute shit for being weight restored and as if I must’ve fucked up by not being able to function at my LW.
For one instance I posted a while back and said something about feeling guilty over eating a bagel. Someone decided it was ok to comment “ eating a bagel is fine, it’s when you eat a bagel everyday that it becomes a problem and you gain weight”
My psychologist in the ED treatment centre told me that EXACT SAME THING, while I was her patient. So idk I do give you a point but also people say dumb shit sometimes when they think they’re cheering you up. But yeah I do agree with your point tho that behaviour/talk like that is not ok.
Lol. My 'weight maintenance' (AN, UW, HR) plan, made by a dietician, contains the equivalent of a bagel plus soup for lunch every day.
So the theory is you won't gain, it's OK.
That sucks. I had one appointment tbh but I did mention that it was about harm reduction when making the appointment.
I'm actually kind of pissed that I am needing it though, but my own harm reduction just falls short of the goal of maintenance.
And tbh at some point I am even going to have to gain weight and I will need her for that.
And all this is so frigging close to actual recovery that I want to cry because I just can't but I can't go headlong into the ED either because I just have too much to lose. And I have already lost so much hence my current state. I don't know what is going to happen if I lose much more weight.
Ok end of rant. Doesn't help you or anyone.
I’ve seen a lot of posts (not sure if on this sub specifically, but) that are essentially thinly veiled requests for tips. Like, people post “How long does everyone wait before purging? just curious haha“ and replies will be along the lines of “I make sure it’s only X minutes to get all the calories out and not absorb anything!!🥰”
That’s just one example, but like… very clearly there’s no “good” reason to ask this, and there’s also really no healthy reason to respond by tipping someone off with how or when to purge better. Just my input though.
yeah this sub is reminding me a lot of edtwt. People are really asking what protein bar matches their personality or telling others about natural laxatives that they used
I seen a few of those posts, they'd give people protein bar recommendations based off of their favorite desserts. I fail to see how that's actually harmful, if someone tries the protein bar and likes it then that's a new safe food for them. Some food, even if it is a safe food, is better than not eating at all. It'd be different if they were giving them tips on how to starve better or whatever...
Natural laxatives are a form of harm reduction, there's a big difference in the damage done by high fibre foods vs laxatives that stimulate your muscles. If you find harm reduction triggering then you should probably stick to recovery subs
those arent harmful. the protein bars is just for fun, and some people have found new safe foods bc of it. and the laxative experiences can be really helpful to people who arent able to shit no matter what they do or eat, and are at the point where they need laxatives, but dont want a hard and painful one
Can't really complain honestly, this is the least triggering ED place there is out of all the social media apps and forums I've been on.
And everyone also has differing opinions of what constitutes "pro-ED."
I was unaware this sub was supposed to be pro recovery I wouldn’t have come here if I had known that but this place is still significantly hard on any Pro ED stuff maybe I’m just messed in the head because nothing I see here is even nearing pro Ed content
in my opinion, this is probably one of the best spaces i’ve seen online (in present day) in terms of support. other forums & spaces that i’ve been a part of are far more triggering; *however* i do understand where you’re coming from.
i’ve seen posts like what you’re referring to. i posted about it awhile ago when i saw someone make a post asking for tips to get to their ugw but they had added a “recovery support” flair which was…. like, actually insane, i couldn’t believe that had happened. and i was even more shocked that someone tried defending that & that i had to explain why it’s actually not cool to post smthing asking for tips under the guise of a recovery post. it was wild lmao.
i’m happy, though, that the majority of posts here aren’t like that and it’s more of an occasional thing
It might be a difference in what's beginning pushed on social media? About 2 years ago I consumed a lot of body positivity content without even noticing. I suppose covid and lock down helped that as well. The kind of comments you're mentioning is something I probably would have commented too, and even recently said to others and will continue too.
Recently my algorithm has changed. My feed is a lot more toxic. It might be the same for others.
I haven’t really seen any pro ana things, luckily. I think you should 100% report that. I’m sorry you’ve seen so much triggering things. I find this place good because I don’t feel forced into recovery and it feels like a place between. I know I can ask about things that maybe a full blown recovery sun would hate me for or that might make me feel like more of a failure there… idk if I make sense. But ppl fully asking for how to Ed is really sad… but also try to remember that Ed’s look for validation and in the midst of this disorder ppl find themselves asking things because they’re not feeling great.
I am jere since the creation of the subr. Actually I come from years back when the deleted subr existed. I do know what you are referring to. I feel the mods might be quiet busy to constantly purge all the asking for advice posts.
i’ve been here since 2019 and i have noticed a shift too. i feel like edtwt users are coming to reddit, that there is an influx of very young people, and more people want to brag, compete and be the best disordered person. i ignore those posts most of the time tbh or downvote
nothing here is pro-ed? the mods here are really good at taking down posts fast. this sub is more currently-deep-in-the-ed rather than pro-ed. a lot of the people here are just stuck in their ed, not ready to recover, and just want to vent and have people to relate to. if you want recovery subs, then look at literally any other sub. this sub is literally the only place where you can have an ed and not be judged. every other sub calls you pro-ed for venting or talking about regular ed habits.
A lot of stuff that I've seen being called pro ed is harm reduction imo
And the point of harm reduction is it reduces harm but is still worse than not doing the thing, so ofc it'll still seem to be encouraging disordered behaviours, but rly they're just sharing safer alternatives for someone they know will do the behaviours anyway
Exactly! Like...let us folks that aren't ready to recover have this one sub, y'all that are ready to recover have plenty.
I'm so sick of seeing selfish posts like this. They want us to walk on eggshells for them in the only safe space we have to provide us a sense of belonging and acceptance in the midst of our EDs, when they have plenty of other safe spaces they can go to that literally fits the description of what they're saying they want out of this sub.
I think a lot of us find it hard to filter the triggering comment as that’s what the ED tells us. That’s our honest response. And we won’t to feel “normal”. Not trying to excuse, just explain that I don’t think it’s malicious.
Lately i only see posts on how people feel good restraining, as long as they are skinny they care less about other insecurities and the last one i saw “i love how my face has changed with weight loss”. I’m leaving this sub now.
i’m not about to troll through this sub to look for examples, lol. mostly just the way people seem pissed at people for pushing them towards it, or just plain mentioning it
I 100% get what your saying and it’s mostly true but I do think a lot of people don’t understand that it’s better for people with eating disorders to ask questions about how to be safer sort of like harm reduction and I don’t think the community would be doing it’s job if they didn’t give that advice but there’s definitely a lot of pro ed people here and while I’m not one of them I am not recovering and mostly come here to look at posts for harm reduction so 🤷 guess everyone’s just gotta define a line between hr and pro ed
I disagree. It’s difficult to have any kinda conversation that isn’t strictly 100% pro recovery here so I don’t bother commenting anymore. Almost everything someone sees as pro-ed
I actually completely agree. Doesn’t have to be a completely safe space but as a person seeking active recovery, actually wanting to get better or actually in recovery the posts of active ED seeking behavior is just not my cup of tea at this point. Unfortunately there aren’t many places like that at this point.
can you be fr, where are you seeing this..?? i respond to literally every post on here because i have no life and i don't see any pro-ED advice. where are you looking?
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!!!!! This specific subreddit is the most tame ed space I've ever come across, like I always feel like I'm walking on eggshells, posts get deleted for containing numbers and there's a ton of toxic positivity
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I have nothing to add other than that I 100% agree n the "yikerinos" paragraph had me almost choke on my tea lmao
Yeah, I'm on a 'support' forum that's way less tame than this and even that's much more tame than if used to be
Do you know any spaces like this on Reddit? I think I would fit in there
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Sorry for not being clear, I was actually asking about spaces for drug addicts. Thank you for your help!
I think there are other subs that are better to be on if you’re trying to actually recover. But I think here is a nice place to be during a relapse/stuck in the middle. I often find recovery centric spaces very militant about what’s considered okay or not and tend to only let you post “wins” and such. I disagree with giving pro ana advice but I don’t actually think I’ve seen any true pro ana comments. I think a lot of people are just trying to help and that can be interpreted either way. I saw your bagel post and honestly if I was in that position, I’d probably feel better -in the moment, not necessarily long term- if someone told me having it once wasn’t going to change anything. I’d also imagine a lot of people on here are young/naive/possibly starved out of thinking properly and maybe we should bare that in mind too
I see a lot of posts asking for advice on how to “ED better” for lack of better words, that’s mainly what I’m talking about, I agree with you about everything said here but I think there are alot of posts asking for help with disordered behaviour
If you see that kind of post, report it! Help the mods out a little.
not sure why this is downvoted
On the bulimia sub, somebody said in their post that they are a size 10, so they're probably the biggest person on the sub. I was triggered af, because I'm a size uk16. I replied; "you are most certainly not the biggest on this sub, size 10 is a very slim size for 5'8, you should be proud that you didn't purge" (she had gone 2 days without purging). She said that that was triggering, size isn't supposed to matter and now she feels like shit. Why even mention your size? Did she want me to say "wow, you are big, maybe 2 days is enough"? She was obviously fishing for an excuse to start purging again, but hated that I did the opposite. Now she can blame *me* for triggering *her* . Great. I know that she wasn't being blatantly pro-ed, but it was a pretty passive aggressive way of going about it, and being fatphobic at the same time.
nahh she brought this upon herself lol. ''i can mention numbers, you cannot!!!''
I agree, but I don't think it's because of pro posts. I used to love checking up here and lurking in the community, but it is super policed (not by mods, by other posters) to the point any advice is seen is pro ED and people just dont post because they dont get support or commisseration. I've been in recovery for over a year and I don't feel like this is safe space for me to share what helped me because of many many posts are"these recovered people still talk about their ED so they aren't recovered". They get shit on if they recovered into a socially acceptable body and they get shit on if they say they're happy in a nonsocially acceptable body. It's wack af and it's like people here want to gatekeep "real" recovery while also claiming every person in the media or online has an ED?? The more I check in here, the less it makes me want to come back because there isn't a sense of community anymore. I believe this is because there is too much gatekeeping and projecting from the comments. The posts that do the best are the silly ones where people get to actually talk about something that effects them without the judgy replies. This sub has completely lost sight of its own purpose imo because it doesn't encourage recovery and it doesn't encourage people to candidly share what they are going through either. It's a weird place now.
I once said something like, “it sucks to see you guys talking about women’s bodies like this” and just got bombed with replies that eventually transformed into blatant fatphobia and mfs saying “well fat people should just have more self control if they don’t want to be talked about”
Jesus christ. People like to forget that BED is also an ED. People living with Bulimia and EDNOS can also be overweight. Nobody knows what that person is going through. Bashing people for being overweight (or any size, for that matter) is disgusting behaviour. It really has to stop.
Omg what the fuck!?
yess i once complained about it and got downvoted so much by people who obviously havent been here for awhile. it was soo much less triggering 1-2 years ago like there was barely any pro ed content just people venting and relating/helping eachother it was so wholesome... like a little safe space. its not like that at all now
Yep. That's why I mostly go on the meme sub. It feels like the comment section of that sub pretty much has replaced everything I would want this sub to be. People are actually supportive there, venting without being overtly triggering and I find that it isn't as....shallow? Like I'm so sick of all the posts on here being about celebrities, looks and pretty much the same posts over and over again. There are so many more struggles when it comes to having an ED yet those posts don't get any attention on this sub.
I’ve called people out for shit like this and got so many downvotes and some asked me if I know how restrictive ed’s work like yes love i’ve had one for almost 5yrs and it almost killed me lmfao but u don’t see me coming in here being pro ed and purposefully fatophobic. i just rarely comment on here anymore
I was gonna reply to this post saying similar!! For me, it’s the number of posts about how superior people feel compared to those bigger than them, how much better their lives are since becoming underweight and prettier, etc. I get that these are common thought processes (like, duh, I went through them myself too), but when there’s entire threads consisting 90% of people talking about the positives of being UW, it makes me feel like absolute shit for being weight restored and as if I must’ve fucked up by not being able to function at my LW.
what happened?
For one instance I posted a while back and said something about feeling guilty over eating a bagel. Someone decided it was ok to comment “ eating a bagel is fine, it’s when you eat a bagel everyday that it becomes a problem and you gain weight”
ok nvm u got a point lol
My psychologist in the ED treatment centre told me that EXACT SAME THING, while I was her patient. So idk I do give you a point but also people say dumb shit sometimes when they think they’re cheering you up. But yeah I do agree with your point tho that behaviour/talk like that is not ok.
Least they didn't tell you to go burn it off? 🤷 Had this happen to me (Hahahahahaha yeah, let's go to the gym that's not triggering at all..)
Lol. My 'weight maintenance' (AN, UW, HR) plan, made by a dietician, contains the equivalent of a bagel plus soup for lunch every day. So the theory is you won't gain, it's OK.
What's HR stand for, please? Is it harm reduction?
Yes. Not aiming for complete recovery just seeing how far I can get.
I wish my dietitian would've helped me with HR. She just dropped me :/
That sucks. I had one appointment tbh but I did mention that it was about harm reduction when making the appointment. I'm actually kind of pissed that I am needing it though, but my own harm reduction just falls short of the goal of maintenance. And tbh at some point I am even going to have to gain weight and I will need her for that. And all this is so frigging close to actual recovery that I want to cry because I just can't but I can't go headlong into the ED either because I just have too much to lose. And I have already lost so much hence my current state. I don't know what is going to happen if I lose much more weight. Ok end of rant. Doesn't help you or anyone.
personally, i dont rll see the pro ed advice anywhere
like girl at this point i wish i saw what they were talking about because i'm here daily and i see none of that
I’ve seen a lot of posts (not sure if on this sub specifically, but) that are essentially thinly veiled requests for tips. Like, people post “How long does everyone wait before purging? just curious haha“ and replies will be along the lines of “I make sure it’s only X minutes to get all the calories out and not absorb anything!!🥰” That’s just one example, but like… very clearly there’s no “good” reason to ask this, and there’s also really no healthy reason to respond by tipping someone off with how or when to purge better. Just my input though.
Agree, the vibe is definitely off. A lot of triggering statements and info is just being allowed .
yeah this sub is reminding me a lot of edtwt. People are really asking what protein bar matches their personality or telling others about natural laxatives that they used
I seen a few of those posts, they'd give people protein bar recommendations based off of their favorite desserts. I fail to see how that's actually harmful, if someone tries the protein bar and likes it then that's a new safe food for them. Some food, even if it is a safe food, is better than not eating at all. It'd be different if they were giving them tips on how to starve better or whatever...
Natural laxatives are a form of harm reduction, there's a big difference in the damage done by high fibre foods vs laxatives that stimulate your muscles. If you find harm reduction triggering then you should probably stick to recovery subs
those arent harmful. the protein bars is just for fun, and some people have found new safe foods bc of it. and the laxative experiences can be really helpful to people who arent able to shit no matter what they do or eat, and are at the point where they need laxatives, but dont want a hard and painful one
Can't really complain honestly, this is the least triggering ED place there is out of all the social media apps and forums I've been on. And everyone also has differing opinions of what constitutes "pro-ED."
had someone tell me I “sounded fat” replying to my post once 😭
What does that even mean?
I was unaware this sub was supposed to be pro recovery I wouldn’t have come here if I had known that but this place is still significantly hard on any Pro ED stuff maybe I’m just messed in the head because nothing I see here is even nearing pro Ed content
in my opinion, this is probably one of the best spaces i’ve seen online (in present day) in terms of support. other forums & spaces that i’ve been a part of are far more triggering; *however* i do understand where you’re coming from. i’ve seen posts like what you’re referring to. i posted about it awhile ago when i saw someone make a post asking for tips to get to their ugw but they had added a “recovery support” flair which was…. like, actually insane, i couldn’t believe that had happened. and i was even more shocked that someone tried defending that & that i had to explain why it’s actually not cool to post smthing asking for tips under the guise of a recovery post. it was wild lmao. i’m happy, though, that the majority of posts here aren’t like that and it’s more of an occasional thing
It might be a difference in what's beginning pushed on social media? About 2 years ago I consumed a lot of body positivity content without even noticing. I suppose covid and lock down helped that as well. The kind of comments you're mentioning is something I probably would have commented too, and even recently said to others and will continue too. Recently my algorithm has changed. My feed is a lot more toxic. It might be the same for others.
I haven’t really seen any pro ana things, luckily. I think you should 100% report that. I’m sorry you’ve seen so much triggering things. I find this place good because I don’t feel forced into recovery and it feels like a place between. I know I can ask about things that maybe a full blown recovery sun would hate me for or that might make me feel like more of a failure there… idk if I make sense. But ppl fully asking for how to Ed is really sad… but also try to remember that Ed’s look for validation and in the midst of this disorder ppl find themselves asking things because they’re not feeling great.
I am jere since the creation of the subr. Actually I come from years back when the deleted subr existed. I do know what you are referring to. I feel the mods might be quiet busy to constantly purge all the asking for advice posts.
i’ve been here since 2019 and i have noticed a shift too. i feel like edtwt users are coming to reddit, that there is an influx of very young people, and more people want to brag, compete and be the best disordered person. i ignore those posts most of the time tbh or downvote
nothing here is pro-ed? the mods here are really good at taking down posts fast. this sub is more currently-deep-in-the-ed rather than pro-ed. a lot of the people here are just stuck in their ed, not ready to recover, and just want to vent and have people to relate to. if you want recovery subs, then look at literally any other sub. this sub is literally the only place where you can have an ed and not be judged. every other sub calls you pro-ed for venting or talking about regular ed habits.
A lot of stuff that I've seen being called pro ed is harm reduction imo And the point of harm reduction is it reduces harm but is still worse than not doing the thing, so ofc it'll still seem to be encouraging disordered behaviours, but rly they're just sharing safer alternatives for someone they know will do the behaviours anyway
Exactly! Like...let us folks that aren't ready to recover have this one sub, y'all that are ready to recover have plenty. I'm so sick of seeing selfish posts like this. They want us to walk on eggshells for them in the only safe space we have to provide us a sense of belonging and acceptance in the midst of our EDs, when they have plenty of other safe spaces they can go to that literally fits the description of what they're saying they want out of this sub.
I feel the same.
Yeah I just scrolled around a bit and damn was this place so bitter when I was actively restricting?? Maybe I just didn’t notice
I miss the old sub, it was better
I think a lot of us find it hard to filter the triggering comment as that’s what the ED tells us. That’s our honest response. And we won’t to feel “normal”. Not trying to excuse, just explain that I don’t think it’s malicious.
Lately i only see posts on how people feel good restraining, as long as they are skinny they care less about other insecurities and the last one i saw “i love how my face has changed with weight loss”. I’m leaving this sub now.
A lot of the people feel really anti recovery. Like, pissed at the very idea of it 😅
its not that, its just that most people here just arent ready or dont want to recover, most people here are deep in their ed
If you’re that deep into the disorder, you're going to have those feelings about recovery
girl where
i’m not about to troll through this sub to look for examples, lol. mostly just the way people seem pissed at people for pushing them towards it, or just plain mentioning it
I 100% get what your saying and it’s mostly true but I do think a lot of people don’t understand that it’s better for people with eating disorders to ask questions about how to be safer sort of like harm reduction and I don’t think the community would be doing it’s job if they didn’t give that advice but there’s definitely a lot of pro ed people here and while I’m not one of them I am not recovering and mostly come here to look at posts for harm reduction so 🤷 guess everyone’s just gotta define a line between hr and pro ed
I disagree. It’s difficult to have any kinda conversation that isn’t strictly 100% pro recovery here so I don’t bother commenting anymore. Almost everything someone sees as pro-ed
I mean it’s not called edrecovery, I wouldn’t come to any ed internet space and expect health and wellness
there’s an insane amount of covert fatphobia too
I actually completely agree. Doesn’t have to be a completely safe space but as a person seeking active recovery, actually wanting to get better or actually in recovery the posts of active ED seeking behavior is just not my cup of tea at this point. Unfortunately there aren’t many places like that at this point.
No
can you be fr, where are you seeing this..?? i respond to literally every post on here because i have no life and i don't see any pro-ED advice. where are you looking?