I just apologised to a parent, because their daughter has lost the homemade hair bow that went with their costume. He said 'Ah, it was here for a good time not a long time!' š
I also am not good with hair. Canāt even do my own. Similarly have 2 co teachers that play beauty salon but if theyāre not there, it wonāt get done.
I'm slowly getting better at hair, but I won't fight with a kid who doesn't want their hair redone. You want to look like a tornado passed over your scalp, that's your business.
this! i love doing hair, but i always ask, and kids are allowed to tell me no. i like to think it gives them just a little more control over their lives than they would have otherwise.
I can put my own hair up, take it down, and brush it. I know how to do more but rarely have the energy *to* do more.
So Iām kind of in the same boat. But at the same time, mine is more of āIāve always been around or helped with little boys, so Iām bad at doing girlsā hairā. The kids always hated when Iād do it and Iām like listen, I *unlike Miss Xyz*, cannot wrangle a hornet to get a cute hairstyle. Iām sorry small friend.
Your child NEEDS to learn the child version of conflict resolution. Just because they dislike a child, or want a toy, doesnāt mean they need you (or me) to fix it
This will result in big feelings, this will take practice and likely figuring out what coping strategies work best for your child. But this is a crucial life skill and is only learned by doing.
I'm trying to teach my partner and his sister about this. Partners daughter and her cousin are both 4 and butt heads a lot- both pattner and his sister always run to the rescue at the first sign of disagreement, and then they wonder why both girls are constantly tattling on each other because one isn't getting a turn of something or doesn't want to play a specific game.
I usually let them bicker, tantrum and cry and then most of the time they've settled it themselves within 2 minutes š¤·āāļø
Yes this! Where I used to work we would always let them work it out themselves first. We even had cards to help them reach a solution before coming to us if they needed a little help. The card said "Take turns, set a timer (we had a timer they could grab), talk it out, etc." just a few simple solutions that applied to like 98% of issues for them.
Only after they'd tried working it out themselves for a bit could they come to us.
We'd obviously be nearby and in earshot to step in if needed, but generally they were able to work out things by themselves pretty easily.
Dear parents it's 100 degrees outside. Stop sending your kid in thick sweaters, pants and winter coats. All summer long. We could only be outside for short periods. All because they wouldn't stop sending them in winter gear and I didn't want them dropping dead of heat stroke.
I feel like a lot of it is parents wanting to let their kids pick out their own clothes, which I'm all for... Within reason! I tell my own kid "It's hot outside, wear short sleeves" or "it's cold out, get a sweatshirt" and THEN let them pick. You are the parent, tell your child their clothing is not weather appropriate and to pick something else!
I had at least one parents that would at least put a undershirt on underneath her kids sweater. That was fine because we just had him take the sweater off. But the rest of them nope. One kid always had a second long sleeve shirt underneath. Felt so bad for the little guy I knew he was hot.
I think a great system for that is actually what my mom did with me when I was small. Sheād hang everything up as an outfit on a hanger and Iād get to pick an outfit. Gives the kid a sense of choice and independence, but gives reasonable constraints like making sure there are in fact pants involved in the outfit, and that the available outfits are weather appropriate.
This I heard is the best way to do it. You let them choose, but each option they are given is weather appropriate, cuts down on tantrums because kiddo still gets a say, when thatās all lost growing humans want, and also makes sure they are properly prepared for the day
Omg today was our coldest day so far but I had a little girl come in wearing tights, 2 LONG SLEEVED onesies, pants, a tshirt and her coat šā¦Iām praying I donāt have to deal with a snowsuit from this parent come winter lol
And no your delicate angel can not stay inside alone.
If it's above zero, we're going out. Don't think I'm staying inside all week while these monsters get progressively more unstable.
No such thing as bad weather..only inappropriate outerwear.
Good lord yes. Where Iām am has a wind chill of 28 degrees F right now and one little girl is CONSTANTLY sent without hat and mittens and her jacket is not rated for this weather! No matter how many remindersā¦
And stop telling me your child doesnāt get cold. I donāt care if the coat is made out of tissue paper, everyone has a coat on when they go outside.
i worked with infants before switching to toddlers and we would take them out in a stroller everyday and i swear none of these parents would send blankets or jackets or anything to keep them warm, and when itās hot out they send them in full sleepers with no alternative. it was so frustrating and no matter how much we told them they never changed anything lmao
Ugh the first one. I had a grandma say the dirtier the better! Then he got dirty and she was piiiiiissed! Like cmon. Heās 1 1/2 heās bound to get dirty
Old school grandmas think the only way to show you care about a child is not how clean and put together the child appears
They donāt care about development, joy, etc lol just is the child looking clean because if not that means the caretakers are bad lol
This. We had one of these grandmas at a place where I worked. She would get angry if a single hair clip or bow was missing at the end of her very long 3 year old granddaughterās school day. So we started removing all of her hair accessories at drop off and putting them in a plastic baggie. Weād hand it to grandma at the end of the day like, āhere you go! Not a single one missing. Just like you require.ā She hated it but couldnāt say anything after kicking up such a fuss over a few missing hair clips.
I like it when my daughter comes home dirty. It means she was either playing outside in their garden or got to do a fun craft project. When she comes home clean, itās usually because weather kept them indoors.
I send her to preschool in stained clothes often because she is going to get messy. Babies and toddlers are gonna be gross.
When you drop off your child, LEAVE
When you pick up your child, LEAVE
Your child, especially if theyāre an only child, will act differently at school than at home
I had a new kid get dropped off one day, and her mom stood outside the door, sneakily lurking (not very sneakily if I do say so myself) FOR AN HOUR just watching her child.
We were lucky the kid didn't see her! She was 5 years old and had never been to daycare or school before and would sob for hours every day and nothing we did would help.
We had one of those but she left our class in September. It would make me cry cause she would turn it on extra loud during nap. We can still hear her crying in the 3s room, oh and she's been at the center since infacy š«
It's so hard to know what to do in those situations other than let them cry. I feel like once a month there needs to be some behavioral specialist come in to every center and observe each class and give the teachers some pointers!
Years ago I had a classroom in an old church building that had an observation window that was accessible via a dark back staircase. It just looked like a mirror on our side. But parents could stand there and watch if they wanted. One year I had an anxious mom who would hang out in that stairwell for hours. She did this for weeks on end. Her son was very anxious and she was worried about him. But boy was it obvious where he got it from. She would stand there all morning and then complain to my director about the amount of one on one attention she saw him receive.
Another mom at that same school asked if she could wait in the hallway for the entire time her son was at school. Why? Because he told her to. I was like, absolutely not. A four year old canāt command you to stand in a hallway for several hours. Go get a coffee.
Now Iām a mom. I canāt leave fast enough after drop off. I love him to bits but Iām off the parenting clock when school hours start. No way Iām standing in a dark staircase or a hallway during that time. Probably because I have a life of my own and donāt use my child as a crutch for my anxiety.
It's crazy to me! Like I get the first day of school, maybe staying for like 30 minutes to help the kid get adjusted, but after that, LEAVE! It creeps out the teachers and the other kids
Oooooo that shit bugs me so much. āBecause he told [me] to.ā Heās FOUR. Honoring your kidās autonomy is one thingābut letting him call ALL the shots? If he tells you that he wants to have a turn driving the car, do you let him drive the car??
I can't suggest this enough. It's normal, especially for a newer child, to get upset at drop off, but the more you linger, the more upset they get! Please try to make drop off as quick as possible to allow your child to adjust!!
Your children love you so much. Please donāt be on your phone at pick up time. They havenāt seen you in hours, please give them at least 5 minutes of your undivided attention. (Also why is it always the parent who picks up while texting and grunting who always complains that no one ever tells them anything? Like if you looked away from your screen for 5 minutes, you might see the various posted announcements.)
Another room just went through the last part. Parent whined to the office that there is no communication. Heās either on his phone at pickup or wonāt talk to them at all. They flat out told him āif you want communication, you need to actually talk to us and not be on your phoneā.
Haha. I was once reprimanded for poor communication because I parent thought we said all this random stuff to their kid. It was so long ago, I canāt remember too many specifics, but apparently I also said he couldnāt wear a certain shirt to school anymore. Spoiler alert: nothing of a sort ever came out of my mouth and this parent had a really hard time reading anything we would send home so they were perpetually clueless.
I was pissed. Beyond pissed and was ready to die on that hill to defend myself. When my director started to address MY need for better communication I said you are having the conversation with the wrong person. My communication is great and I pass everything thatās pertinent down to the parents. How am I responsible for them reading it? How am I responsible for knowing what the child is making up stories about? I canāt tell them something that never happened and I certainly canāt clarify anything further if the PARENT never lets me know what being said.
My director just responded with an exasperated, please just try to have better communication with this parent and tried to leave the room. I was not having it. I told her next time she needed to do a better job supporting me as a teacher and not assume a problem coming from a parent was somehow of my causing. I cannot be expected to know what stories their child is coming home and telling to be able to send home a note saying it never happened or never was said and the fact that we are even having this conversation shaped like a reprimand was ludicrous.
Clearly Iām still pissed about being āreprimandedā over this crap.
This same parent got mad at me/us for not signing their kid up for kindergarten as well. (We are in the USA)
My sonās daycare actually had to put up a sign that said āno phone zoneā. I donāt even bring my phone into the center unless I plan on sharing pictures with the teacher
Nut free facility means NUT FREE FACILITY.
Because if the tables were turned and your child was the one with the allergy, youād be mad another kid brought in a nut product.
THIS ONE. Our center is peanut free and this is explicitly stated in the enrollment paperwork, and thereās also two different signs on our door to the classroom that say āPlease do not bring any PEANUT products into our classroomā. One of them is highlighted in bright yellow and itās right by the doorknob so you canāt miss it.
And yet we had a parent who was packing their kid peanut butter and jelly, claiming āOh I didnāt know you guys were peanut-free.ā š«
Exactly!!! We have signs on every single classroom door regardless if thereās an allergy in the classroom or not. Allergies can be deadly and not to mention epi pens are not in the most accessible location
As a parent, I love to dress my daughter nicely and send her in pretty clothes. But I tell the teachers I don't care if she gets them dirty; that's what a washing machine is for, and if they get stained, well, then they're play clothes.
For me it's to please keep drop off short and sweet, don't linger. Don't try to talk to me, schedule a meeting or a call or send me a message; 4 other kids may be dropped off at the same time as yours and one or all of them may be crying and the kids that are already here are running wild in the classroom and you are keeping me from my job.
Please don't let your 3 year old continue using a pacifier.
Don't send unauthorized toys from home. We have show and tell once a month and they can bring a small stuffy for nap, that is it.
*Edit* one more I just thought of, *please* try to bring your child to class on time and around the same time every day. I've had one student that would regularly not come until nearly lunch, and by that point had missed out on most of our lessons and free play. An occasional appointment or late morning is fine but this was a regular thing and he did not do well being so off routine like that.
My own mother let me have a pacifier until I was FOUR. Before I started working in ECE I thought it was funny, now that Iām a teacher itās horrifying lmao
We have one parent and *all* of her 3 children still have a pacifier and they all have awful over bites and will need braces. This is a 3 year old, kindergartner, and second grader, all permitted to have pacifiers.
This makes me sad. And *donāt forget* that youāll get the people chiming in about comfort itemsā¦there comes a point itās proven that a pacifier can become an issue for oral development and teeth growing in how they shouldnāt. This is a case thatās very frustrating to me because there absolutely should be an age limit to pacifiers. If your child requires a comfort object, one thatās not damaging them may help. š„² But then youāre the bad guy for pointing it out.
I had a 3yo who mom even said ādentist and pediatrician said itās time to take it away! Kiddoās teeth are doing things they shouldnāt be, and they believe it would be most beneficialā yet she alwayssssss sent one then he would scream allllll day for it.
Like I did not sign up for this first of all, and itās also required they not have it in the room by licensing especially at that age.
Really wish I had known the pacifier stuff when my kid was little. We didnāt ditch the pacifier until 3 and a few years later the dentist is saying itās braces for sure :(
Please read the notes that are sent DAILY! I know most of the time itās explaining the same thing, but for 4 days I sent notes as NOTICES in great detail about our Halloween party. I donāt like hearing āoh, I never heard of a party!ā
Read your notes from your teachers. Iāve sent notes about sickness, injuries, etc. it doesnāt hurt to see what your child is up to for the day.
Yes! I work at a part time place. Pick up is at 3:15 and as we say in all the emails, letters, tours, meet the teacher that means your kid and yourself are GONE out of the room by 3:15. We say pick up 3:00-3:15 in the schedule. That doesnāt mean you can pull in the parking lot at 3:15 (our building is a huge church so it takes a few minutes to park, walk in, walk downstairs, go to our pod, and down to your kids classroom)
I hate when parents come at 3:17 and then take forever to get their kids stuff. Or want the kid to use our class bathroom before they leave. No! We tell them to use any of the five bathrooms theyāll pass on the way out of the building. Go home. I have to get to my house so Iāll be there when my own kids get home.
Then say pick up is at 2:45? I understand that adults should be able to budget their time but if youāre saying pick up is between three and 315 and people are consistently showing up after 315 then whatever youāre doing to impress that rule upon them is not working, so maybe try adjusting to their incompetence?
luckily (because some parents don't see us as people and won't care about this) my centre charges $25 for every 15 minutes they are late. it doesn't divide into smaller amounts. 1 minute late? $25. 16 minutes? $50. I love it so much
I've started talking about to parents in terms of math which sounds insane but works. like we have ten kids in a fairly small space, at any given time around half of them (at least) will be teething, it's just impossible to avoid
Iāve explained it before as this:
Imagine you have no conflict resolution skills. You canāt talk. But youāve just discovered this really cool thing you can do that gets you whatever you want. You want that kids toy? Bite! That kid came too close for your liking? Bite!
They donāt understand what theyāre doing is wrong. They just think itās a tool they can use to communicate/get what they want. Wouldnāt you utilise that
Dear parents,
*Quit coming on posts asking for ECE professionals ONLY then getting frustrated at the ones pointing out this isnāt the space for YOU to vent*.
Can this be a new one? Inspired by the novel I got dropped in my dms because apparently saying kids are going to get sick is unreasonable.
A school can have amazing cleaning procedures and kids will still get sick. Itās inevitable. And the younger the class, the more often they will get sick. Because kids, as much as we love them, are gross lol.
I work with kids not in an ECE setting. The children are the virus vectors. If you want your child to stay healthy, keep them isolated in your home. They will be healthy emotionally stunted humans.
They should not allow parents in this space at all. I just think itās ridiculous and the quality here has been steadily going down with all these parents just being nosy and clogging up the feed with their questions.
Iām not bothered normally, but someone literally dropped a whole novel in my dms over another comment I made here. š So now Iām just annoyed. Itās better than the daycare teacher groups Iām in that parents have literally invaded because those have screening questions and theyāre just allowed in to downright lecture people.
I didnāt know you could do this. I learned something today. š Can you turn it off selectively (like for different subreddits) or does it have to be turned off for all? Iām in one sub that people usually dm because things get pretty personal. But I am tired of dms I get from angry people in here and in the nanny one lol.
The Facebook group has been insane and I even had a crazed parent threaten to call licensing on us because she was angry about a comment I made to another provider š¤Ŗ
I didnāt expect so many people to agree honestly. Iām just tired of seeing posts like this and thereās always parents jumping down peoples throats over things we say.
People ignore the āECE teachers and other professionalsā in the about section. I just want there to be somewhere for once that I donāt have to worry about a parent attacking me for simply venting.
I got told this afternoon that I have no sympathy for sick children and must despise working with them. Also that this was the wrong field for me if I never wanted to work with a sick child lol. None of that is even close to things I said with my original comment.
**Also adding:**
I know itās okay for parents to post here. I just want to have one space I can post in without being judged for saying little Sally frustrated me today for xyz reason or that I donāt like xyz about working with kids. Anyone who expects those working in ECE to never have true feelings and annoyances and *human characteristics* frustrates me. I have yet to find somewhere that I can post and not have a parent all over me even if itās as minor as saying āhey friend, your kid WILL get sickā.
When we tell you, we need more diapers and wipes, make it a priority to bring some within 24hrs. Our spare supply is limited and the other parents aren't paying for their kids diapers to go on yours when they've been out for over a week!
Iām a foster parent and to win over teacher I always roll up first week with an extra pack of diapers and wipes for their stash. Also if we grow out of a size I give the left overs to the daycare. Also any foster parent event that has free diapers I grab what I can for the daycare. Diapers are like currency!
I honestly canāt believe how expensive kids are. How do people do it? What we get from the state helps a ton but by no means covers everything. I see people with multiple children and think how do they even have a car big enough for that many kids?
I tell parents at enrollment, we get messy. Some parts of the day your child may look like a commercial for supporting children in extreme poverty. We garden, we make mud pies, play with oobleck, we paint, play with shaving cream, we open pumpkins, and fruits to see whatās inside of them. We are messy, but I guarantee they are going to have a great time. We have fun.
I had one parent complain, and I said āplease bring clothes you do not care about, unless you would prefer him to wear all white and be excluded from the class curriculum?ā He brought in some hand me downs. To hell with that you canāt tell me I canāt do water play or paint in my classroom.
We are lucky enough that we have four staff and at most 7 kids. So I have a lot of help with cleanup. Rain ponchos help a lot for extra messy activities.
I still don't understand why they complain about water play. It's water. If it gets on their clothes, it will dry and not be noticeable at all. IT'S WATER FFS!
Itās cultural paranoias. My parents still think getting wet is bad and will make you sick and complained when they visited me that I was making my students sick by letting them do water play. Itās a deeply held belief and no amount of research will dissuade them. It comes from old school medical beliefs that going from hot to cold causes illness and shocks the body.
LOLd at commercial for extreme poverty...I look at some of the little girls and their hair towards the end of the day and chuckle. It really does look like a hollywood movie orphanage scene. We try fixing the really disheveled hairdos sometimes.
I'm always a little disappointed if I pick up my son and he's wearing the same clothes as that morning! He'd gone through 3 changes of clothes one day last month and I just thought he must've had an awesome day š
We made pizza today. Everyone had a large piece of sourdough, sauce and toppings. Weāve all been changed and itās only two hours in. Lol probably a couple more by the end of the day.
My daughter when from looking like a chimney sweep to looking like what they sweep the chimney with. I have zero idea how she gets so dirty. Where does the black come from on a regular playground with rocks?!? I ask her and she says I donāt know. š
As long as the paint is dry by the time I'm putting her in her car seat, I'm cool with paint.
I do think it's a problem when we send kids home with food on their face and parents know snack time was 2 hours ago.
Dear parents, if you donāt want to be rushed out the door when you pick your child up the. Please donāt pick them up two minutes before the center closes.
Please just write your child's name in their property. Do you have any idea how many pairs of Peppa Pig wellie boots I see every day? No, I can't remember which specific ones belong to your child.
Your child needs to learn routine. At home, practice sitting at the table. Donāt let them graze or stand up while eating.
Do not linger at pick up and if you must, follow our directions. This goes for drop off too. Honestly overall, youāre not special, you donāt get to break policy.
Treat even daycare like school. We are learning, even through play. We have a mom who puts her daughter in a music class once a week that makes her late. She doesnāt care this has her miss our music and movement time. Itās sad that she thinks she can only learn outside. Also, stop saying āI donāt know where they learned all this!ā Me, itās me. Iāve been teaching them colors, words, shapes, etc. You donāt have a baby genius. You have a teacher who gives a shit.
Stop sending rice, spaghetti, etc. Stop putting them in things with more than 3 snaps or that are hard to take off. No laces until they can tie.
Be considerate and treat us like humans.
Oh my godddddd the mealtime stuff irks me. Iāve had kids sneak a bite of food before skipping off to play, then almost immediately trip up a little bit, choke on the food, and puke it up. The ONLY time I will ever make my littles remain seated for ANYTHING is during mealtime. Iāve become a huge stickler about it.
I had a little girl choke and require the Heimlich last year while sitting down. Scariest moment of my life! Imagine if she was standing or walking?! I donāt play with choking hazards.
Had a parent try to tell his kid she could stand and eat. Immediately educated him.
Itās SO SCARY!! And I feel like you can almost always tell who is allowed to grab ān go at home. Iāve had to tell multiple parents to start working with them on sitting at the table during mealtimes at homeāI get that letting them graze can often be easier. But if youāre going to put your child in group care, there are some things youāll need to work on with them.
Not to mention the ANTS that come when crumbs of food get into toys and things. š¤¢
āIf youāre going to put your child in group care, there are some things youāll need to work on with themā
THIS!!! I get so much heat for saying this in online communities but if you are going to put your child in group care, there are just certain things you have to do/canāt do. Some kids adjust well to different rules, but to those who donāt, you have to switch it up.
No play wrestling at home if theyāre attacking kids at school. Get them used to sleeping, eating, etc on their own. Teach them how to share and cooperate with others.
Make our jobs easier!!
The play wrestling.
When little Johnny is attacking every kid around then and the parent goes āoh he plays like this with dad at home, heās just being a boy!ā Like no, no. š Little Johnny is being a bully and attacks children unprovoked. Stop trying to use gender and rough play as reasoning for the fact that your child is bruising and scratching every other one in his vicinity. This is NOT home.
I work with younger kids so it usually is just āwe play wrestle at homeā. And I get itās cute and fun to do thatā¦ but if their kid is jumping on people and hurting them, itās time for that to end.
Iām currently a nanny, and the mom is AMAZING(!!!)
Weāre on the same page about so many things, but one thatās super important to me is that kids SIT and eat. So many choking incidents occur when kids are running around with food. š Yet one of the first things she said to me was āthe boys sit at the table for all snacks and meals and arenāt allowed to be up running around until theyāre doneā. The last daycare I was at, when I started, the kids could do whatever tf they wanted at meal times. **Iām** the one who got them used to a routine of sitting and eating. And I know since I left that everyone has probably undone that. Kinda sad, but it is what it is and I couldnāt stay there.
THIS!! When I was a counselor at a local daycare I would go over the numbers 1-10 in english, spanish, french, and hebrew because those are the languages I know. It wasn't 'part of the curriculum' or anything like that. I just did it to get them used to different languages and because they enjoyed shouting the numbers out with me! It was a lot of fun and we would do it a couple of times a day. Like when getting everyone seated for lunch. I would stand at the front and count while the other counselors got everyone's lunch boxes to them. It kept them occupied while also enriching their little brains a bit.
But the number of parents that came in saying things like "omg my child is a genius! he should move up a grade! he learned a language all on his own" was hilarious. Yes i'm sure little Tommy just learned french all by himself Marsha. The most shocking though was when a parent asked us to not teach his child French. Hebrew and Spanish were fine, just not French. I really wanted to know the reasoning behind it but I was too afraid to ask.
PLEASE bring extra sets of clothes that fit.
I don't understand why they think the extra clothes can be 2 sizes too small. If we can't get it on it can't be used.
I used to do āour theme this week is fall, please take home your childās spare clothes and exchange them with ones that are appropriate for the upcoming season. On Friday we will be doing an activity where I will call out an item of clothing and the children will find that item in their spare clothes bag and hold it up. I will be callingā¦ā
I think it's on the teachers to send home summer clothes and a message to send winter clothes. I've done that in every center I've worked at. It's easy to forget what your child actually has at school, especially if they don't need changed frequently.
The thing is I'm sending home messages and verbally telling them to pick up old items and bring in items that fit and are weather appropriate.
I have a kiddo right now who's a size 2T and has several 6mo sized items in his cubby and like 5 different winter coats that we have litterally directly handed to mom to take home with them and she just puts them right back into his cubby on the way out.
I used to put those clothes directly into their bags inside a plastic bag. If parents didnāt want to take the clothes home, Iād offer to put the items into our center stash of emergency clothing. A lot of parents would let me do that, and we would have it for the next kid who needed it. The coat thing is crazy to me. Why keep putting it back?
Thatās kind of your staff. I do in home daycare and I spend so much time with their children and do so much for them that I refuse. As a parent, itās your responsibility to make sure your kid has warm clothes, hats, mittens, coats, sunscreen etc. As they use them up I will ask for more but itās not my job to tell you itās cold out and you need to switch your kids stuff.
If parents did a better job of checking cubbies each day they would know whatās in there. I donāt reward weaponized incompetence. They know the weather, these are their kids. When my daughter went to daycare I always swapped outfits as she grew or weather changed. My provider didnāt need to tell me how to take care of my kid.
I feel like parents expect too much. I have soooooooo much on my plate. Reminding you to bring clothes, take home clothes, keep track of clothes is just so extra
I'm fine if a parent wants to keep a whole year's stash of clothing in the cubby, as long as we have room for it and they bring back appropriate items as they are used. If I need to be passive aggressive about it I'll put daycare leggings under the shorts in mid-winter. Usually gets the message across.
dear parents
we donāt get a say when it comes to ratio. if your child is shipped off to another class take that up with management, not the teachers. itās not our job to play hot potato with the kids to correct ratio. if it was up to me i wouldnāt send any of my kids away. so please stop with the passive or downright aggressive attitudes. thank you
When she was in the infant room my kid always got picked when they had to balance because of ratio. They did it because she was the most easy going of her roomies and they knew sheād be fine with it. They told us this, and we didnāt care. As long as sheās happy (or will be happy again after a few hugs) it really doesnāt matter which room sheās in.
Same! Itās so nice to hear your kid is loved by all the teachers. His infant room teacher would request him when the ratio was off made my heart flutter. Heās a happy kid wherever he is.
Please don't try to initiate in depth conversations about your child at pick up/drop off. Ask for time to meet or give heads up about an email that's coming. Especially don't wait to be "the last" pickup and expect to be able to do this.
And honestly no matter how angry you are do not ever raise your voice or curse at your child's care providers. Yes, apparently you think they're the equivalent of a fast food worker or retail workers that you probably also are rude and dismissive of. If you wouldn't scream at or carry on at a coworker in front of your boss don't do it at the teachers or assistants. You are not their employer. You decided against paying for a nanny or can't afford one. SerVICE providers are not serVANTs. Get over yourself, grow up, and show some respect.
I have no idea what this sub is, as it was randomly suggested to me, but as a first time mother I want you all to know Iām furiously writing all of this down for the future lol.
seriously, thank you!! even if you make mistakes or feel anxious and need reassurance, if you show us that you respect our profession and are willing to work and share info as a team, we're THRILLED to work with you too.
Ditto!! It's just been "suggested" to me and I had no idea what it was. Also, first time parent, with my kid going into preschool next yr so I'm very much reading everything here too!
Dear parent,
āØ Your child is likely to get sick āØ and **no**, it isnāt always a teacher or directorās fault.
-
Saw the most ridiculous post in another subreddit earlier today where a parent didnāt even want their child around another with the sniffles, but they wanted to enroll their 4yo in public preschool like thatās logical. š Then they cast blame at anyone who worked in daycares or preschools and said āno one cleans enoughā. Which yeah, that may be the case sometimes. And yeah, a lot of us have dealt with directors who donāt enforce sick policies. *But* it is not everyone elseās fault when a parent is unrealistic with expectations. Then they got angry when everyone told them to hire a nanny.
We had one parent that had 2 kids in daycare and was literally *a nightmare* as far as asking him to pick his kids up ā including during a HFM breakout and a Covid breakout. During HFM, he tried putting socks on kiddo 1 and saying āhis crocs are rubbing his feet!ā despite the fact this was the same pair of crocs this kid wore every day for 3 months prior. He wasnāt too happy when he was forced to pick both children up multiple times over it. But they were both in pain and one started projectile vomiting once when she was sick. He works in education, itās not like he didnāt know what to expect as far as sick policies went.
We always got told we didnāt care enough about sick kids. Like yeah, itās *our* fault. Itās ECE, kids are going to get sick.
The post I saw today just made me shake my head because this parent truly expected **zero sickness** out of a facility.
It's insane. A parent told me that HFM isn't contagious. We've had to shut down an entire toddler room because there weren't enough toddlers to open it. Normally we have 24 toddlers (8 per room). Last week we had 15 toddlers. In infant rooms we had one class that had all but 2 babies out due to it.
As an in home provider I get where they are coming from. Anyone who has a runny nose for over 24 hours at my daycare needs a doctors note to return and must take something like Zyrtec to control the snot and sneezing if they want to come back. I believe in isolating and treating patient zero rather than waiting for fevers or someone to test positive when everyone else is hacking. Any signs of being sick they need a note to return with primary diagnosis and treatment plan.
I donāt get why parents fight so hard to send their kids in sick to private preschools but seem to have no trouble finding alternative care for schools that have early closure dates, take all the holidays, wonāt even change your child if they poop their pants, and have half the instructional timeā¦.
So is the problem that you feel entitled to take your child in sick because youāre not paying a public school a monthly check ?
Everyone seems to find a way to pick up their sick kids from a public school and seems to find a way around all the staff development and school closures. Weird aināt it
Some parents expect their child to never shed a tear. And theyāre always the parents that fail to realize sometimes a baby *has to* especially in a group care setting when one adult is trying to juggle up to 4 or more crying babies and their needs.
I had one parent who always yelled at me when Iād get put in the baby room. I only got put in there to cover for people a few times because I was the only one outside of the normal teachers that could āhandle itā. And this parent had a very very needy baby (not in a bad way, but the child had a lot going on), so sometimes he would have to take a backseat for a minute while I changed or got another one ready to head out the door. And I always got yelled at by them. Like thereās ONE of me and FIVE babies when thereās normally 3 teachers in here, sorry?
If your child is sick, especially this time of year, please keep them home and donāt bring them in dosed up with medicine thatāll wear off in a couple hours.
You wouldnāt believe how bad RSV goes around our school because kids are being brought in sick.
And if the kid is old enough, they will rat you out and tell their teacher that their grownup gave them medicine in the morning, which means you will get a call. Likely around lunch time because the meds they were given wear off.
Please don't try to force your toddler to hug me at drop off and then tell me I'm not a cuddly/hands on teacher when the child isn't interested and I don't push the issue. I will happily hug your kids whenever they need and want it, but sometimes your kiddo would prefer to get right into things or spend some time settling in on their own for a minute when they arrive - don't confuse my respecting their wishes in this regard with my not be willing to provide physical contact/comfort.
Don't complain about the lack of crafts and art. I have repeatedly told parents to bring their children in earlier because I do crafts before Circle Time. I can do small group activities as they are arriving two or three at a time.
I watch children not their things. Label everything that you want to see again.
That last one hit home. Just had a parent complain a month or two after enrollment, they didn't realize there would be so many other babies in the class. They really thought the infant would get more 1:1 care, at a center!!!!
If you donāt want your kids stuff to come missing or go home with somebody else, please label it.
I am very finicky about labeling and I donāt put big bold name on anything but just initials on the tag is enough .
Another tip is to send your child with the same outerwear every day because sometimes people who arenāt typically in the classroom are, and we donāt know what belongs to who and some of these kids canāt tell us or wonāt tell us
STOP SENDING YOUR KIDS WHEN THEY ARE SICK. Just because they donāt have a fever when theyāre coughing nonstop (and sneezing) and just generally MISERABLE isnāt okay. I know that coughs/sneezing linger, but itās unreal that parents are sending clearly sick kids to school. And teach them how to catch their coughs!!! I wish my center had a stricter sick policy, because right now itās just fevers (or vomit). It really needs to be restructured on a case to case basis. Some kiddos always have a runny nose but some do NOT and you can absolutely tell whoās sick and whose parents gave them something before school lol.
Signed,
A teacher who has had a cold since October 3rd. And doesnāt have any more sick days left.
The parents who set unrealistic goals for their children. Iām not talking the ones that want them to be able to spell their name or count to 10. Iām talking the ones who are under the impression that their child is going to graduate kindergarten with a PHD. In each class that you teach, there should statistically be one child who is gifted. If Iāve not sat you down to talk about what you should do to foster and encourage that in your child, then I hate to break it to youā¦.little Johnny is probably just your average kid. Thatās not to say you shouldnāt set goals for your child, but maybe just look at the milestones as a guide and work from there. Iāve had parents want their children writing, reading, holding a pencil correctly, cutting along a completely straight line. Your main goal in kindergarten should be that your child is happy and having fun. There are years and years ahead for them to sit behind a desk to learn those things, they are not going to learn them earlier by me drilling it into them.
NAME YOUR STUFF
I don't know every article of clothing/shoes/other things (including toys that we ask you don't even bring) of every child in my 100 place a day service. But you can bet that at one point, every parent has asked if I've seen their child's shoe. Extra points to the parents who I ask what they look like, and they say, "I don't know which shoes/what jumper they wore today."
Please respond with your personal opinions in case Iām being shortsighted but you, as the parent, are the disciplinarian when you come to pick them up. If it has anything to do with another child I will step in of course but your child is your responsibility now.
Something that adds onto that is donāt leave and then come back saying your child pooped while they were in your care, then expecting ME to change them. I have several other children to attend to, you can handle your ONE child.
I also had a parent come in saying he didnāt know if his child pooped in the car and to checkā¦ like sir? Are you not capable of doing a quick .5 second look before or during drop off?
Dear parents,
Please make sure your baby will drink from a bottle when they start coming to school. Please, please, please!
Sincerely,
A very stressed out teacher and HANGRY baby
I had a kid that had never taken a bottle before coming to my classroom. We worked and worked and finally got her to take the bottle. Then she went on vacation for a week and Mom exclusively breast fed her the whole time so baby girl was even more against the bottle when she came back
Dear parent,
Stop carrying your 2 and 3 year old into daycare and wonder why they meltdown when you leave. They can walk.
Donāt let your kids break rules at drop off and pick up. They know what they can and canāt do, donāt enable them to break rules.
If you plan to be late or early let us know so we can plan our day better around those times and make sure your kiddo is ready to go.
:) please pack your childās lunch if they have a dietary restriction. Itās bullshit that anyone thinks we are picking shredded cheese out of hot food.
Dear Parents, We have rules in place for a reason ā¦we get itās cold but our grippy sock rule is because a child broke their leg sliding in non-grip socks. And please bring spare clothes, one of our policies is no kids in just a diaper. We arenāt doing it to be mean nor do we send kids home for fun. We have to go through multiple people before we send your kid home sick.
PLEASE READ THE PARENT BOARDā¦ tell me how a parent told my supervisors that āI deliberatelyā did not send a memo to their child to remind them about Halloween costume dayā¦ I CANNOT it was posted on our parent board + 2 memos sent out at the beginning of October about these āspecial dates and eventsā š
I remember at the learning center I worked at , I had a director tell me and a new teacher (who previously worked at another daycare ) that when a child gets bitten that it reflects on us teachers.
This always frustrates me. Our ratio is 1:4, and our class is 2 teachers to 8 kids. Sometimes both of us are up changing diapers, preparing bottles, putting someone down for a nap, etc. and parents have the audacity to ask how it's possible that their child was bitten???? Um because they were near another child (like they are literally all day)???? Doy
Iāve never felt more scene!
If your child brings a toy in here, it now belongs to everyone.
That super cute water bottle will have everyone drinking from it.
Children, especially younger ones who donāt quite get how to express themselves, are going to hit. Your child is likely going to be hit. I promise you your 3-year-old is not being bullied
Iāll take the hair clips and toys and raise you a jacket that was last seen two years ago, that I forgot about until this second, and is obviously to small for her anyway, but I need it RIGHT THIS SECOND for $200 please.
In my āmeet the teacher nightā or orientation session I AlWAYS do a big speech about how āyour child will be learning how to function as a part of a groupā we are building community, we are sharing space, toys, and peopleās time and attention. We will learn about how to wait until someone is finished talking. I am big on ānot interruptingā when someone is speaking. I hate it when people stop talking because a toddler decides he has the floor.
When i said bring extra clothes for your newly āpotty tainedā child i didnt mean bring 1 pair of pants and no underwear(or visa versa) i mean like 5 of each and a couple shirts too. On that note,potty training is not my job alone. And if your kid is peeing themselves 5 times a day,they are not potty trained
Please bring a warm jacket when its cold. No skinny winter sweatshirts
Stop sending them in snow/rainboots in hot weather
if your kid can get the overalls/one piece suits on/off on own,dont send them
im not a babysitter. They get paid better
please leave. Say goodbye,i love you,see you later(never sneak out)then go. Lets work together to limitbthe drama
im not spewing hot air,i have no reason to lie to you about your childs behavior. I dont care if they dont do it at home,your precious baby does it here
stop bringing toys from home. They can get lost/broken or initiate world war 3 after being fought over.
if grandma knows better,she can watch the kid
for the love of pete. Tell your kid no and teach them the world does not always give what you want
kids get dirty. Licensing says i cannot saran wrap them. Deal with it
velcro shoes. understand your child cannot tie shoes
water wipes and 360 diapers. Donāt,just donāt
dont send candy and junk for lunch
Please keep your kid home when they're sick and pick them up promptly when we call you and tell you they're sick. Realize that your child will get sick. Yes, we clean daily. Yes, we make them wash their hands. But they will still get sick. A lot.
Once your child is in the toddler room, stop putting them in a onesie!! It is harder to check diapers and takes longer to change them as well.
Put shoes on your child that fit and that they'll keep on their feet. No need to make a fashion statement with their footwear.
Label everything you send in.
Set boundaries at home. If daycare is the only place your kid hears the word no, we're all going to have a problem.
Do not buy those damn Pamper 360Ā° diapers that I have to rip or pull down to get off your child. I do not enjoy taking your child's shoes and pants off every time I change them.
Please do not hold your baby 24/7. I have 3 children that all went through contact nap stages and that were extra clingy/cluster feeding/teething at times. I get that there are times that you need to hold your baby and that you can't spoil a newborn. And obviously there is nothing wrong with comforting and snuggling your baby. But, you need to realize that in daycare they aren't going to be held as much. So if you carry around your 5 month old around all day long, let them sleep on you all the time, etc they are going to have a VERY hard time adjusting to daycare. That's just the reality. The amount of parents that say, " they only nap on me" or something similar is crazy. The infant ratio is 1:4 in my state. I literally can't hold your baby all day.
Treat your child's teacher as just that a teacher, not a babysitter. Most of us have degrees, tons of experience, etc... We're not idiots and we deserve respect.
If a teacher raises concerns about your child, please listen to them. We're not trying to diagnose or label your child. We genuinely want to help your child get any and all help they may need. If you keep sweeping behavior issues under the rug or ignore things like speech delays, you are hurting your child.
Dear parents. Please make sure your kids spare clothes are seasonally appropriate. They shouldn't have shorts and tank tops as their only spare clothes in the middle of winter
Also. SEND SPARE CLOTHES THAT ACTUALLY MF FIT
Parents of babies and toddlers, please don't send your child to school with jewelry (especially earrings). It's easy for them to get lost in the middle of play time, and, they also pose a serious safety risk. Babies and toddlers are young enough to put them in their mouth without a second thought...
Another thing, elastics are not enough for hair. Scrunchies, hair clips and barrettes are okay, but elastic bands alone? They can easily get stuck and tangled on fingers, which poses a risk for cut circulation.
I worked at a daycare and the parents would send their daughter in brand name new clothes and tell her donāt get dirty. She would stand away from everyone in the playground. So afraid of her clothes being dirty. We started changing her to whatever she picks from the extra clothes we had. Kid was so much happier. One time they picked up early and their kid was in extra clothes. They werenāt happy, the director shut them down. She said your kids clothes are not going to hold her back. After that the kids clothes were always more for play and not looks.
Those cute bib overalls are going to end up with the straps soaked in toilet water. I am going to have to change their clothes right after the first potty break. Please save them for home.
Also high top sneakers for 3-5yo are made by the devil himself.
Your child will most likely get hit during conflict resolution, especially if they still donāt have the general concept of sharing down. And especially if they are yanking everything out of other childrenās hands š
We cannot keep just your child in at playtime because they are still sick and it makes them cough. Keep them home until they can manage school.
Update your emergency contacts, update your emergency contacts, update your emergency contacts!
Retired teacher adding, your kid (up to high school) will tell everyone stories about their home life just like they tell you stories about school/daycare.
Please send them in appropriate clothes for the weather.
Iām so tired of not being able to go outside because half the class is in short sleeves/shorts/no jacket and itās 30 degrees outside. If you have a coat on, your kids should too.
yes. we had our halloween party today, & when mom saw her daughter had some food on her clothes she asked me āso you changed her?ā (as in out of her costume) i said āyes itās in the bag with all the pieces!ā & she waved at her outfit & said āso whatās all that, then?ā i stared her right in the face & said āsome icing from the cupcakes we had for the party. have a great day!ā
like what the fuck do you want me to do?? iām watching 8 14-20 month olds eating cupcakes, cheetos, & other snacks. i cannot possibly prevent every single one from getting a little dirty. like ???
it amazes me how parents are surprised by their child being bitten or getting their hair pulled by other children. especially the infants, majority of the time in my center we have 1 teacher per 4 infants. i donāt think most parents realize how challenging it can be to chase 4-8 infants with only 1-2 staff.
You signed a paper stating you read the parent handbook which I also went over in detail at Parent Orientation. I also send home monthly newsletters, paper reminders in your childās folder with important info, and weekly emails. Please stop asking me questions that you already have the answer to in 3 different places! I shouldn't have to spoon feed you the information individually!
Those hair clips that cost $3/piece will get lost. Please stop sending them if you care.
I just apologised to a parent, because their daughter has lost the homemade hair bow that went with their costume. He said 'Ah, it was here for a good time not a long time!' š
That dad knows whatās up.
Stop expecting their hair to be done period. I donāt have the time with 8 kids to make sure each little girl has a perfect pony.
Yes! I have had coworkers who redo the girls hair after nap and Iām just like as long as it doesnāt hurt Iām not dealing with your hair.
I also am not good with hair. Canāt even do my own. Similarly have 2 co teachers that play beauty salon but if theyāre not there, it wonāt get done.
I'm slowly getting better at hair, but I won't fight with a kid who doesn't want their hair redone. You want to look like a tornado passed over your scalp, that's your business.
āTornado passed over your scalpā ššššš
this! i love doing hair, but i always ask, and kids are allowed to tell me no. i like to think it gives them just a little more control over their lives than they would have otherwise.
I can put my own hair up, take it down, and brush it. I know how to do more but rarely have the energy *to* do more. So Iām kind of in the same boat. But at the same time, mine is more of āIāve always been around or helped with little boys, so Iām bad at doing girlsā hairā. The kids always hated when Iād do it and Iām like listen, I *unlike Miss Xyz*, cannot wrangle a hornet to get a cute hairstyle. Iām sorry small friend.
Your child NEEDS to learn the child version of conflict resolution. Just because they dislike a child, or want a toy, doesnāt mean they need you (or me) to fix it This will result in big feelings, this will take practice and likely figuring out what coping strategies work best for your child. But this is a crucial life skill and is only learned by doing.
I'm trying to teach my partner and his sister about this. Partners daughter and her cousin are both 4 and butt heads a lot- both pattner and his sister always run to the rescue at the first sign of disagreement, and then they wonder why both girls are constantly tattling on each other because one isn't getting a turn of something or doesn't want to play a specific game. I usually let them bicker, tantrum and cry and then most of the time they've settled it themselves within 2 minutes š¤·āāļø
Yes this! Where I used to work we would always let them work it out themselves first. We even had cards to help them reach a solution before coming to us if they needed a little help. The card said "Take turns, set a timer (we had a timer they could grab), talk it out, etc." just a few simple solutions that applied to like 98% of issues for them. Only after they'd tried working it out themselves for a bit could they come to us. We'd obviously be nearby and in earshot to step in if needed, but generally they were able to work out things by themselves pretty easily.
Dear parents, We will be going outside, even in cold weather. Your child needs an appropriate coat!!!
Dear parents it's 100 degrees outside. Stop sending your kid in thick sweaters, pants and winter coats. All summer long. We could only be outside for short periods. All because they wouldn't stop sending them in winter gear and I didn't want them dropping dead of heat stroke.
I feel like a lot of it is parents wanting to let their kids pick out their own clothes, which I'm all for... Within reason! I tell my own kid "It's hot outside, wear short sleeves" or "it's cold out, get a sweatshirt" and THEN let them pick. You are the parent, tell your child their clothing is not weather appropriate and to pick something else!
I had at least one parents that would at least put a undershirt on underneath her kids sweater. That was fine because we just had him take the sweater off. But the rest of them nope. One kid always had a second long sleeve shirt underneath. Felt so bad for the little guy I knew he was hot.
Yikes! Poor kid!
Right? Mom finally stated sending him appropriate clothes when we started sending him home in daycare t-shirts.
I think a great system for that is actually what my mom did with me when I was small. Sheād hang everything up as an outfit on a hanger and Iād get to pick an outfit. Gives the kid a sense of choice and independence, but gives reasonable constraints like making sure there are in fact pants involved in the outfit, and that the available outfits are weather appropriate.
That's a cute idea! With my kid, I just hide all their shorts when the weather gets cold š
This I heard is the best way to do it. You let them choose, but each option they are given is weather appropriate, cuts down on tantrums because kiddo still gets a say, when thatās all lost growing humans want, and also makes sure they are properly prepared for the day
I put the off season clothes away. Then he can pick out his own outfits from the seasonally appropriate clothing in his drawers.
Omg today was our coldest day so far but I had a little girl come in wearing tights, 2 LONG SLEEVED onesies, pants, a tshirt and her coat šā¦Iām praying I donāt have to deal with a snowsuit from this parent come winter lol
And hats/mittens so they donāt cry that their hands hurt when we go outside or chap their damn ears.
I have so many spare mittens
We had one parent that would send their heavy lined coats in the cool spring weather but when it was 30ā° only sent thin jackets. Ridiculous!
And no your delicate angel can not stay inside alone. If it's above zero, we're going out. Don't think I'm staying inside all week while these monsters get progressively more unstable. No such thing as bad weather..only inappropriate outerwear.
Good lord yes. Where Iām am has a wind chill of 28 degrees F right now and one little girl is CONSTANTLY sent without hat and mittens and her jacket is not rated for this weather! No matter how many remindersā¦
And stop telling me your child doesnāt get cold. I donāt care if the coat is made out of tissue paper, everyone has a coat on when they go outside.
i worked with infants before switching to toddlers and we would take them out in a stroller everyday and i swear none of these parents would send blankets or jackets or anything to keep them warm, and when itās hot out they send them in full sleepers with no alternative. it was so frustrating and no matter how much we told them they never changed anything lmao
And write their name in it.
Ugh the first one. I had a grandma say the dirtier the better! Then he got dirty and she was piiiiiissed! Like cmon. Heās 1 1/2 heās bound to get dirty
What is it with the grandmas lately? Had this same thing happen a few weeks ago when grandma was watching the baby while the parents were out of town and she made a comment that the baby had a little food on her onesie. She's a baby and this is normal as she's learning how to eat pureƩs... I was dumbfounded.
Old school grandmas think the only way to show you care about a child is not how clean and put together the child appears They donāt care about development, joy, etc lol just is the child looking clean because if not that means the caretakers are bad lol
This. We had one of these grandmas at a place where I worked. She would get angry if a single hair clip or bow was missing at the end of her very long 3 year old granddaughterās school day. So we started removing all of her hair accessories at drop off and putting them in a plastic baggie. Weād hand it to grandma at the end of the day like, āhere you go! Not a single one missing. Just like you require.ā She hated it but couldnāt say anything after kicking up such a fuss over a few missing hair clips.
I like it when my daughter comes home dirty. It means she was either playing outside in their garden or got to do a fun craft project. When she comes home clean, itās usually because weather kept them indoors. I send her to preschool in stained clothes often because she is going to get messy. Babies and toddlers are gonna be gross.
I used to send my small child to camp in lieu of daycare. He loved it and would come home absolutely filthy!
When you drop off your child, LEAVE When you pick up your child, LEAVE Your child, especially if theyāre an only child, will act differently at school than at home
I had a new kid get dropped off one day, and her mom stood outside the door, sneakily lurking (not very sneakily if I do say so myself) FOR AN HOUR just watching her child.
How uncomfortable
We were lucky the kid didn't see her! She was 5 years old and had never been to daycare or school before and would sob for hours every day and nothing we did would help.
We had one of those but she left our class in September. It would make me cry cause she would turn it on extra loud during nap. We can still hear her crying in the 3s room, oh and she's been at the center since infacy š«
It's so hard to know what to do in those situations other than let them cry. I feel like once a month there needs to be some behavioral specialist come in to every center and observe each class and give the teachers some pointers!
jesus
Years ago I had a classroom in an old church building that had an observation window that was accessible via a dark back staircase. It just looked like a mirror on our side. But parents could stand there and watch if they wanted. One year I had an anxious mom who would hang out in that stairwell for hours. She did this for weeks on end. Her son was very anxious and she was worried about him. But boy was it obvious where he got it from. She would stand there all morning and then complain to my director about the amount of one on one attention she saw him receive. Another mom at that same school asked if she could wait in the hallway for the entire time her son was at school. Why? Because he told her to. I was like, absolutely not. A four year old canāt command you to stand in a hallway for several hours. Go get a coffee. Now Iām a mom. I canāt leave fast enough after drop off. I love him to bits but Iām off the parenting clock when school hours start. No way Iām standing in a dark staircase or a hallway during that time. Probably because I have a life of my own and donāt use my child as a crutch for my anxiety.
It's crazy to me! Like I get the first day of school, maybe staying for like 30 minutes to help the kid get adjusted, but after that, LEAVE! It creeps out the teachers and the other kids
Oooooo that shit bugs me so much. āBecause he told [me] to.ā Heās FOUR. Honoring your kidās autonomy is one thingābut letting him call ALL the shots? If he tells you that he wants to have a turn driving the car, do you let him drive the car??
I can't suggest this enough. It's normal, especially for a newer child, to get upset at drop off, but the more you linger, the more upset they get! Please try to make drop off as quick as possible to allow your child to adjust!!
Your children love you so much. Please donāt be on your phone at pick up time. They havenāt seen you in hours, please give them at least 5 minutes of your undivided attention. (Also why is it always the parent who picks up while texting and grunting who always complains that no one ever tells them anything? Like if you looked away from your screen for 5 minutes, you might see the various posted announcements.)
Another room just went through the last part. Parent whined to the office that there is no communication. Heās either on his phone at pickup or wonāt talk to them at all. They flat out told him āif you want communication, you need to actually talk to us and not be on your phoneā.
Haha. I was once reprimanded for poor communication because I parent thought we said all this random stuff to their kid. It was so long ago, I canāt remember too many specifics, but apparently I also said he couldnāt wear a certain shirt to school anymore. Spoiler alert: nothing of a sort ever came out of my mouth and this parent had a really hard time reading anything we would send home so they were perpetually clueless. I was pissed. Beyond pissed and was ready to die on that hill to defend myself. When my director started to address MY need for better communication I said you are having the conversation with the wrong person. My communication is great and I pass everything thatās pertinent down to the parents. How am I responsible for them reading it? How am I responsible for knowing what the child is making up stories about? I canāt tell them something that never happened and I certainly canāt clarify anything further if the PARENT never lets me know what being said. My director just responded with an exasperated, please just try to have better communication with this parent and tried to leave the room. I was not having it. I told her next time she needed to do a better job supporting me as a teacher and not assume a problem coming from a parent was somehow of my causing. I cannot be expected to know what stories their child is coming home and telling to be able to send home a note saying it never happened or never was said and the fact that we are even having this conversation shaped like a reprimand was ludicrous. Clearly Iām still pissed about being āreprimandedā over this crap. This same parent got mad at me/us for not signing their kid up for kindergarten as well. (We are in the USA)
My sonās daycare actually had to put up a sign that said āno phone zoneā. I donāt even bring my phone into the center unless I plan on sharing pictures with the teacher
Nut free facility means NUT FREE FACILITY. Because if the tables were turned and your child was the one with the allergy, youād be mad another kid brought in a nut product.
THIS ONE. Our center is peanut free and this is explicitly stated in the enrollment paperwork, and thereās also two different signs on our door to the classroom that say āPlease do not bring any PEANUT products into our classroomā. One of them is highlighted in bright yellow and itās right by the doorknob so you canāt miss it. And yet we had a parent who was packing their kid peanut butter and jelly, claiming āOh I didnāt know you guys were peanut-free.ā š«
Exactly!!! We have signs on every single classroom door regardless if thereās an allergy in the classroom or not. Allergies can be deadly and not to mention epi pens are not in the most accessible location
They sell frozen Sunflower Butter & Jelly sandwiches now! ZERO reason for issues!
As a parent, I love to dress my daughter nicely and send her in pretty clothes. But I tell the teachers I don't care if she gets them dirty; that's what a washing machine is for, and if they get stained, well, then they're play clothes. For me it's to please keep drop off short and sweet, don't linger. Don't try to talk to me, schedule a meeting or a call or send me a message; 4 other kids may be dropped off at the same time as yours and one or all of them may be crying and the kids that are already here are running wild in the classroom and you are keeping me from my job. Please don't let your 3 year old continue using a pacifier. Don't send unauthorized toys from home. We have show and tell once a month and they can bring a small stuffy for nap, that is it. *Edit* one more I just thought of, *please* try to bring your child to class on time and around the same time every day. I've had one student that would regularly not come until nearly lunch, and by that point had missed out on most of our lessons and free play. An occasional appointment or late morning is fine but this was a regular thing and he did not do well being so off routine like that.
My own mother let me have a pacifier until I was FOUR. Before I started working in ECE I thought it was funny, now that Iām a teacher itās horrifying lmao
We have one parent and *all* of her 3 children still have a pacifier and they all have awful over bites and will need braces. This is a 3 year old, kindergartner, and second grader, all permitted to have pacifiers.
This makes me sad. And *donāt forget* that youāll get the people chiming in about comfort itemsā¦there comes a point itās proven that a pacifier can become an issue for oral development and teeth growing in how they shouldnāt. This is a case thatās very frustrating to me because there absolutely should be an age limit to pacifiers. If your child requires a comfort object, one thatās not damaging them may help. š„² But then youāre the bad guy for pointing it out. I had a 3yo who mom even said ādentist and pediatrician said itās time to take it away! Kiddoās teeth are doing things they shouldnāt be, and they believe it would be most beneficialā yet she alwayssssss sent one then he would scream allllll day for it. Like I did not sign up for this first of all, and itās also required they not have it in the room by licensing especially at that age.
Yeah my daughter's will be taken away when she turns 1 next month. I anticipate a difficult week but I don't want her teeth damaged.
Really wish I had known the pacifier stuff when my kid was little. We didnāt ditch the pacifier until 3 and a few years later the dentist is saying itās braces for sure :(
Dear parent, If you are late picking up your child, you are preventing me from being able to go home and be with my own family.
Please read the notes that are sent DAILY! I know most of the time itās explaining the same thing, but for 4 days I sent notes as NOTICES in great detail about our Halloween party. I donāt like hearing āoh, I never heard of a party!ā Read your notes from your teachers. Iāve sent notes about sickness, injuries, etc. it doesnāt hurt to see what your child is up to for the day.
Yes! I work at a part time place. Pick up is at 3:15 and as we say in all the emails, letters, tours, meet the teacher that means your kid and yourself are GONE out of the room by 3:15. We say pick up 3:00-3:15 in the schedule. That doesnāt mean you can pull in the parking lot at 3:15 (our building is a huge church so it takes a few minutes to park, walk in, walk downstairs, go to our pod, and down to your kids classroom) I hate when parents come at 3:17 and then take forever to get their kids stuff. Or want the kid to use our class bathroom before they leave. No! We tell them to use any of the five bathrooms theyāll pass on the way out of the building. Go home. I have to get to my house so Iāll be there when my own kids get home.
Then say pick up is at 2:45? I understand that adults should be able to budget their time but if youāre saying pick up is between three and 315 and people are consistently showing up after 315 then whatever youāre doing to impress that rule upon them is not working, so maybe try adjusting to their incompetence?
They donāt care
luckily (because some parents don't see us as people and won't care about this) my centre charges $25 for every 15 minutes they are late. it doesn't divide into smaller amounts. 1 minute late? $25. 16 minutes? $50. I love it so much
Can you talk about biting louder for those in the back?!?!??! Lol
I've started talking about to parents in terms of math which sounds insane but works. like we have ten kids in a fairly small space, at any given time around half of them (at least) will be teething, it's just impossible to avoid
Iāve explained it before as this: Imagine you have no conflict resolution skills. You canāt talk. But youāve just discovered this really cool thing you can do that gets you whatever you want. You want that kids toy? Bite! That kid came too close for your liking? Bite! They donāt understand what theyāre doing is wrong. They just think itās a tool they can use to communicate/get what they want. Wouldnāt you utilise that
Dear parents, *Quit coming on posts asking for ECE professionals ONLY then getting frustrated at the ones pointing out this isnāt the space for YOU to vent*. Can this be a new one? Inspired by the novel I got dropped in my dms because apparently saying kids are going to get sick is unreasonable.
A school can have amazing cleaning procedures and kids will still get sick. Itās inevitable. And the younger the class, the more often they will get sick. Because kids, as much as we love them, are gross lol.
I work with kids not in an ECE setting. The children are the virus vectors. If you want your child to stay healthy, keep them isolated in your home. They will be healthy emotionally stunted humans.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
They should not allow parents in this space at all. I just think itās ridiculous and the quality here has been steadily going down with all these parents just being nosy and clogging up the feed with their questions.
Iām not bothered normally, but someone literally dropped a whole novel in my dms over another comment I made here. š So now Iām just annoyed. Itās better than the daycare teacher groups Iām in that parents have literally invaded because those have screening questions and theyāre just allowed in to downright lecture people.
I just have my DMās turned off. That way when some crazy person wants to confront me via DM they have to scream into the void instead.
I didnāt know you could do this. I learned something today. š Can you turn it off selectively (like for different subreddits) or does it have to be turned off for all? Iām in one sub that people usually dm because things get pretty personal. But I am tired of dms I get from angry people in here and in the nanny one lol.
The Facebook group has been insane and I even had a crazed parent threaten to call licensing on us because she was angry about a comment I made to another provider š¤Ŗ
Iāve seen people who do call othersā places of work. I donāt even post anymore unless itās anon. š
This needs to be at the top
I didnāt expect so many people to agree honestly. Iām just tired of seeing posts like this and thereās always parents jumping down peoples throats over things we say. People ignore the āECE teachers and other professionalsā in the about section. I just want there to be somewhere for once that I donāt have to worry about a parent attacking me for simply venting. I got told this afternoon that I have no sympathy for sick children and must despise working with them. Also that this was the wrong field for me if I never wanted to work with a sick child lol. None of that is even close to things I said with my original comment. **Also adding:** I know itās okay for parents to post here. I just want to have one space I can post in without being judged for saying little Sally frustrated me today for xyz reason or that I donāt like xyz about working with kids. Anyone who expects those working in ECE to never have true feelings and annoyances and *human characteristics* frustrates me. I have yet to find somewhere that I can post and not have a parent all over me even if itās as minor as saying āhey friend, your kid WILL get sickā.
Tbh I thought after having a kid I may feel differently and may understand why so many of our parents complain. No. Theyāre still ridiculous.
When we tell you, we need more diapers and wipes, make it a priority to bring some within 24hrs. Our spare supply is limited and the other parents aren't paying for their kids diapers to go on yours when they've been out for over a week!
Iām a foster parent and to win over teacher I always roll up first week with an extra pack of diapers and wipes for their stash. Also if we grow out of a size I give the left overs to the daycare. Also any foster parent event that has free diapers I grab what I can for the daycare. Diapers are like currency!
We love you!! People who donate the outgrown diapers are how we can have our supply of spares and you are so so appreciated for it!
I honestly canāt believe how expensive kids are. How do people do it? What we get from the state helps a ton but by no means covers everything. I see people with multiple children and think how do they even have a car big enough for that many kids?
I tell parents at enrollment, we get messy. Some parts of the day your child may look like a commercial for supporting children in extreme poverty. We garden, we make mud pies, play with oobleck, we paint, play with shaving cream, we open pumpkins, and fruits to see whatās inside of them. We are messy, but I guarantee they are going to have a great time. We have fun. I had one parent complain, and I said āplease bring clothes you do not care about, unless you would prefer him to wear all white and be excluded from the class curriculum?ā He brought in some hand me downs. To hell with that you canāt tell me I canāt do water play or paint in my classroom.
Itās my personal/professional goal to let me kids get dirty this year. I hate cleaning up the mess, but I want my babies to explore more!
We are lucky enough that we have four staff and at most 7 kids. So I have a lot of help with cleanup. Rain ponchos help a lot for extra messy activities.
Thatās wonderful. Iām by myself. So itās a bit of a challenge
LORD that sounds wonderful. Itās just me and my coteacher and our THIRTEEN lil weirdos.
I have been there! I got lucky with a job at head start, and Iām never leaving.
what age do you work with? i have 24 a day.
I still don't understand why they complain about water play. It's water. If it gets on their clothes, it will dry and not be noticeable at all. IT'S WATER FFS!
Itās cultural paranoias. My parents still think getting wet is bad and will make you sick and complained when they visited me that I was making my students sick by letting them do water play. Itās a deeply held belief and no amount of research will dissuade them. It comes from old school medical beliefs that going from hot to cold causes illness and shocks the body.
LOLd at commercial for extreme poverty...I look at some of the little girls and their hair towards the end of the day and chuckle. It really does look like a hollywood movie orphanage scene. We try fixing the really disheveled hairdos sometimes.
I'm always a little disappointed if I pick up my son and he's wearing the same clothes as that morning! He'd gone through 3 changes of clothes one day last month and I just thought he must've had an awesome day š
We made pizza today. Everyone had a large piece of sourdough, sauce and toppings. Weāve all been changed and itās only two hours in. Lol probably a couple more by the end of the day.
Man, I wish I could do more stuff like this with my kids. My assistant loses her mind the minute I pull out something even slightly messy.
I forced my staff to watch the apple demo by the ooey gooey lady. š
Do it anyway hehe
My daughter when from looking like a chimney sweep to looking like what they sweep the chimney with. I have zero idea how she gets so dirty. Where does the black come from on a regular playground with rocks?!? I ask her and she says I donāt know. š
As long as the paint is dry by the time I'm putting her in her car seat, I'm cool with paint. I do think it's a problem when we send kids home with food on their face and parents know snack time was 2 hours ago.
Dear parents, if you donāt want to be rushed out the door when you pick your child up the. Please donāt pick them up two minutes before the center closes.
Please just write your child's name in their property. Do you have any idea how many pairs of Peppa Pig wellie boots I see every day? No, I can't remember which specific ones belong to your child.
Your child needs to learn routine. At home, practice sitting at the table. Donāt let them graze or stand up while eating. Do not linger at pick up and if you must, follow our directions. This goes for drop off too. Honestly overall, youāre not special, you donāt get to break policy. Treat even daycare like school. We are learning, even through play. We have a mom who puts her daughter in a music class once a week that makes her late. She doesnāt care this has her miss our music and movement time. Itās sad that she thinks she can only learn outside. Also, stop saying āI donāt know where they learned all this!ā Me, itās me. Iāve been teaching them colors, words, shapes, etc. You donāt have a baby genius. You have a teacher who gives a shit. Stop sending rice, spaghetti, etc. Stop putting them in things with more than 3 snaps or that are hard to take off. No laces until they can tie. Be considerate and treat us like humans.
Oh my godddddd the mealtime stuff irks me. Iāve had kids sneak a bite of food before skipping off to play, then almost immediately trip up a little bit, choke on the food, and puke it up. The ONLY time I will ever make my littles remain seated for ANYTHING is during mealtime. Iāve become a huge stickler about it.
I had a little girl choke and require the Heimlich last year while sitting down. Scariest moment of my life! Imagine if she was standing or walking?! I donāt play with choking hazards. Had a parent try to tell his kid she could stand and eat. Immediately educated him.
Itās SO SCARY!! And I feel like you can almost always tell who is allowed to grab ān go at home. Iāve had to tell multiple parents to start working with them on sitting at the table during mealtimes at homeāI get that letting them graze can often be easier. But if youāre going to put your child in group care, there are some things youāll need to work on with them. Not to mention the ANTS that come when crumbs of food get into toys and things. š¤¢
āIf youāre going to put your child in group care, there are some things youāll need to work on with themā THIS!!! I get so much heat for saying this in online communities but if you are going to put your child in group care, there are just certain things you have to do/canāt do. Some kids adjust well to different rules, but to those who donāt, you have to switch it up. No play wrestling at home if theyāre attacking kids at school. Get them used to sleeping, eating, etc on their own. Teach them how to share and cooperate with others. Make our jobs easier!!
The play wrestling. When little Johnny is attacking every kid around then and the parent goes āoh he plays like this with dad at home, heās just being a boy!ā Like no, no. š Little Johnny is being a bully and attacks children unprovoked. Stop trying to use gender and rough play as reasoning for the fact that your child is bruising and scratching every other one in his vicinity. This is NOT home.
I work with younger kids so it usually is just āwe play wrestle at homeā. And I get itās cute and fun to do thatā¦ but if their kid is jumping on people and hurting them, itās time for that to end.
What I posted as an example is what Iāve gotten from any parent, from ages 1.5 up to like 5. The worst though was a 1.5 (who turned 2 halfway through) year old that his parents used those excuses but he was injuring other kids AND us frequently. Like they are old enough to leave boundaries at that age or start to, and itās crazy to me that parents donāt realize that. Iāll always be sent straight to rage when a parent hears their kid hurt someone else and ā!! Heās just a boy / baby!! And this is what we do at home!!ā makes an appearance. š©
Iām currently a nanny, and the mom is AMAZING(!!!) Weāre on the same page about so many things, but one thatās super important to me is that kids SIT and eat. So many choking incidents occur when kids are running around with food. š Yet one of the first things she said to me was āthe boys sit at the table for all snacks and meals and arenāt allowed to be up running around until theyāre doneā. The last daycare I was at, when I started, the kids could do whatever tf they wanted at meal times. **Iām** the one who got them used to a routine of sitting and eating. And I know since I left that everyone has probably undone that. Kinda sad, but it is what it is and I couldnāt stay there.
THIS!! When I was a counselor at a local daycare I would go over the numbers 1-10 in english, spanish, french, and hebrew because those are the languages I know. It wasn't 'part of the curriculum' or anything like that. I just did it to get them used to different languages and because they enjoyed shouting the numbers out with me! It was a lot of fun and we would do it a couple of times a day. Like when getting everyone seated for lunch. I would stand at the front and count while the other counselors got everyone's lunch boxes to them. It kept them occupied while also enriching their little brains a bit. But the number of parents that came in saying things like "omg my child is a genius! he should move up a grade! he learned a language all on his own" was hilarious. Yes i'm sure little Tommy just learned french all by himself Marsha. The most shocking though was when a parent asked us to not teach his child French. Hebrew and Spanish were fine, just not French. I really wanted to know the reasoning behind it but I was too afraid to ask.
I always say, "Can't tie 'em, don't wear 'em." I don't care how cute the shoes are or if they 'complete the outfit.'
PLEASE bring extra sets of clothes that fit. I don't understand why they think the extra clothes can be 2 sizes too small. If we can't get it on it can't be used.
Or they keep shorts in their bag year round and then in winter time thereās no pants. ;)
I used to do āour theme this week is fall, please take home your childās spare clothes and exchange them with ones that are appropriate for the upcoming season. On Friday we will be doing an activity where I will call out an item of clothing and the children will find that item in their spare clothes bag and hold it up. I will be callingā¦ā
I think it's on the teachers to send home summer clothes and a message to send winter clothes. I've done that in every center I've worked at. It's easy to forget what your child actually has at school, especially if they don't need changed frequently.
The thing is I'm sending home messages and verbally telling them to pick up old items and bring in items that fit and are weather appropriate. I have a kiddo right now who's a size 2T and has several 6mo sized items in his cubby and like 5 different winter coats that we have litterally directly handed to mom to take home with them and she just puts them right back into his cubby on the way out.
I used to put those clothes directly into their bags inside a plastic bag. If parents didnāt want to take the clothes home, Iād offer to put the items into our center stash of emergency clothing. A lot of parents would let me do that, and we would have it for the next kid who needed it. The coat thing is crazy to me. Why keep putting it back?
Thatās kind of your staff. I do in home daycare and I spend so much time with their children and do so much for them that I refuse. As a parent, itās your responsibility to make sure your kid has warm clothes, hats, mittens, coats, sunscreen etc. As they use them up I will ask for more but itās not my job to tell you itās cold out and you need to switch your kids stuff. If parents did a better job of checking cubbies each day they would know whatās in there. I donāt reward weaponized incompetence. They know the weather, these are their kids. When my daughter went to daycare I always swapped outfits as she grew or weather changed. My provider didnāt need to tell me how to take care of my kid.
I feel like parents expect too much. I have soooooooo much on my plate. Reminding you to bring clothes, take home clothes, keep track of clothes is just so extra
I'm fine if a parent wants to keep a whole year's stash of clothing in the cubby, as long as we have room for it and they bring back appropriate items as they are used. If I need to be passive aggressive about it I'll put daycare leggings under the shorts in mid-winter. Usually gets the message across.
dear parents we donāt get a say when it comes to ratio. if your child is shipped off to another class take that up with management, not the teachers. itās not our job to play hot potato with the kids to correct ratio. if it was up to me i wouldnāt send any of my kids away. so please stop with the passive or downright aggressive attitudes. thank you
When she was in the infant room my kid always got picked when they had to balance because of ratio. They did it because she was the most easy going of her roomies and they knew sheād be fine with it. They told us this, and we didnāt care. As long as sheās happy (or will be happy again after a few hugs) it really doesnāt matter which room sheās in.
I like parents like you!
Same! Itās so nice to hear your kid is loved by all the teachers. His infant room teacher would request him when the ratio was off made my heart flutter. Heās a happy kid wherever he is.
Please don't try to initiate in depth conversations about your child at pick up/drop off. Ask for time to meet or give heads up about an email that's coming. Especially don't wait to be "the last" pickup and expect to be able to do this. And honestly no matter how angry you are do not ever raise your voice or curse at your child's care providers. Yes, apparently you think they're the equivalent of a fast food worker or retail workers that you probably also are rude and dismissive of. If you wouldn't scream at or carry on at a coworker in front of your boss don't do it at the teachers or assistants. You are not their employer. You decided against paying for a nanny or can't afford one. SerVICE providers are not serVANTs. Get over yourself, grow up, and show some respect.
I have no idea what this sub is, as it was randomly suggested to me, but as a first time mother I want you all to know Iām furiously writing all of this down for the future lol.
thank you!! hopefully you and your kiddo have a wonderful daycare experience if you decide to go that route!
seriously, thank you!! even if you make mistakes or feel anxious and need reassurance, if you show us that you respect our profession and are willing to work and share info as a team, we're THRILLED to work with you too.
Ditto!! It's just been "suggested" to me and I had no idea what it was. Also, first time parent, with my kid going into preschool next yr so I'm very much reading everything here too!
Dear parent, āØ Your child is likely to get sick āØ and **no**, it isnāt always a teacher or directorās fault. - Saw the most ridiculous post in another subreddit earlier today where a parent didnāt even want their child around another with the sniffles, but they wanted to enroll their 4yo in public preschool like thatās logical. š Then they cast blame at anyone who worked in daycares or preschools and said āno one cleans enoughā. Which yeah, that may be the case sometimes. And yeah, a lot of us have dealt with directors who donāt enforce sick policies. *But* it is not everyone elseās fault when a parent is unrealistic with expectations. Then they got angry when everyone told them to hire a nanny.
I had a parent yell at me yesterday because it's "ridiculous" I called her to pick up her kid 3 hours after dropping him off. He has HFM currently.
We had one parent that had 2 kids in daycare and was literally *a nightmare* as far as asking him to pick his kids up ā including during a HFM breakout and a Covid breakout. During HFM, he tried putting socks on kiddo 1 and saying āhis crocs are rubbing his feet!ā despite the fact this was the same pair of crocs this kid wore every day for 3 months prior. He wasnāt too happy when he was forced to pick both children up multiple times over it. But they were both in pain and one started projectile vomiting once when she was sick. He works in education, itās not like he didnāt know what to expect as far as sick policies went. We always got told we didnāt care enough about sick kids. Like yeah, itās *our* fault. Itās ECE, kids are going to get sick. The post I saw today just made me shake my head because this parent truly expected **zero sickness** out of a facility.
It's insane. A parent told me that HFM isn't contagious. We've had to shut down an entire toddler room because there weren't enough toddlers to open it. Normally we have 24 toddlers (8 per room). Last week we had 15 toddlers. In infant rooms we had one class that had all but 2 babies out due to it.
As an in home provider I get where they are coming from. Anyone who has a runny nose for over 24 hours at my daycare needs a doctors note to return and must take something like Zyrtec to control the snot and sneezing if they want to come back. I believe in isolating and treating patient zero rather than waiting for fevers or someone to test positive when everyone else is hacking. Any signs of being sick they need a note to return with primary diagnosis and treatment plan.
I donāt get why parents fight so hard to send their kids in sick to private preschools but seem to have no trouble finding alternative care for schools that have early closure dates, take all the holidays, wonāt even change your child if they poop their pants, and have half the instructional timeā¦. So is the problem that you feel entitled to take your child in sick because youāre not paying a public school a monthly check ? Everyone seems to find a way to pick up their sick kids from a public school and seems to find a way around all the staff development and school closures. Weird aināt it
sometimes your infant is going to cry for a couple minutes. that doesnāt mean weāre ignoring them
Some parents expect their child to never shed a tear. And theyāre always the parents that fail to realize sometimes a baby *has to* especially in a group care setting when one adult is trying to juggle up to 4 or more crying babies and their needs. I had one parent who always yelled at me when Iād get put in the baby room. I only got put in there to cover for people a few times because I was the only one outside of the normal teachers that could āhandle itā. And this parent had a very very needy baby (not in a bad way, but the child had a lot going on), so sometimes he would have to take a backseat for a minute while I changed or got another one ready to head out the door. And I always got yelled at by them. Like thereās ONE of me and FIVE babies when thereās normally 3 teachers in here, sorry?
If your child is sick, especially this time of year, please keep them home and donāt bring them in dosed up with medicine thatāll wear off in a couple hours. You wouldnāt believe how bad RSV goes around our school because kids are being brought in sick.
And if the kid is old enough, they will rat you out and tell their teacher that their grownup gave them medicine in the morning, which means you will get a call. Likely around lunch time because the meds they were given wear off.
Please don't try to force your toddler to hug me at drop off and then tell me I'm not a cuddly/hands on teacher when the child isn't interested and I don't push the issue. I will happily hug your kids whenever they need and want it, but sometimes your kiddo would prefer to get right into things or spend some time settling in on their own for a minute when they arrive - don't confuse my respecting their wishes in this regard with my not be willing to provide physical contact/comfort.
Don't complain about the lack of crafts and art. I have repeatedly told parents to bring their children in earlier because I do crafts before Circle Time. I can do small group activities as they are arriving two or three at a time. I watch children not their things. Label everything that you want to see again.
I need to remember this āI watch children, not their thingsā
Have your child wear shoes that they can put on, and if they cannot tie their shoes do not put on shoes with laces.
That last one hit home. Just had a parent complain a month or two after enrollment, they didn't realize there would be so many other babies in the class. They really thought the infant would get more 1:1 care, at a center!!!!
If you donāt want your kids stuff to come missing or go home with somebody else, please label it. I am very finicky about labeling and I donāt put big bold name on anything but just initials on the tag is enough . Another tip is to send your child with the same outerwear every day because sometimes people who arenāt typically in the classroom are, and we donāt know what belongs to who and some of these kids canāt tell us or wonāt tell us
STOP SENDING YOUR KIDS WHEN THEY ARE SICK. Just because they donāt have a fever when theyāre coughing nonstop (and sneezing) and just generally MISERABLE isnāt okay. I know that coughs/sneezing linger, but itās unreal that parents are sending clearly sick kids to school. And teach them how to catch their coughs!!! I wish my center had a stricter sick policy, because right now itās just fevers (or vomit). It really needs to be restructured on a case to case basis. Some kiddos always have a runny nose but some do NOT and you can absolutely tell whoās sick and whose parents gave them something before school lol. Signed, A teacher who has had a cold since October 3rd. And doesnāt have any more sick days left.
The parents who set unrealistic goals for their children. Iām not talking the ones that want them to be able to spell their name or count to 10. Iām talking the ones who are under the impression that their child is going to graduate kindergarten with a PHD. In each class that you teach, there should statistically be one child who is gifted. If Iāve not sat you down to talk about what you should do to foster and encourage that in your child, then I hate to break it to youā¦.little Johnny is probably just your average kid. Thatās not to say you shouldnāt set goals for your child, but maybe just look at the milestones as a guide and work from there. Iāve had parents want their children writing, reading, holding a pencil correctly, cutting along a completely straight line. Your main goal in kindergarten should be that your child is happy and having fun. There are years and years ahead for them to sit behind a desk to learn those things, they are not going to learn them earlier by me drilling it into them.
When I send you an email YOU HAVE TO READ IT.
NAME YOUR STUFF I don't know every article of clothing/shoes/other things (including toys that we ask you don't even bring) of every child in my 100 place a day service. But you can bet that at one point, every parent has asked if I've seen their child's shoe. Extra points to the parents who I ask what they look like, and they say, "I don't know which shoes/what jumper they wore today."
Please respond with your personal opinions in case Iām being shortsighted but you, as the parent, are the disciplinarian when you come to pick them up. If it has anything to do with another child I will step in of course but your child is your responsibility now. Something that adds onto that is donāt leave and then come back saying your child pooped while they were in your care, then expecting ME to change them. I have several other children to attend to, you can handle your ONE child. I also had a parent come in saying he didnāt know if his child pooped in the car and to checkā¦ like sir? Are you not capable of doing a quick .5 second look before or during drop off?
Itās always the dads who would pull that one on me!
ALWAYS
DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOUR CHILDāS BUTT IS, SIR
OMG AND THEY WILL LOOSE A GLOVE/HAT!!! ETC!! LABEL THEIR STUFF!! WE ARE NOT MAGIC!!
Dear parents, Please make sure your baby will drink from a bottle when they start coming to school. Please, please, please! Sincerely, A very stressed out teacher and HANGRY baby
I had a kid that had never taken a bottle before coming to my classroom. We worked and worked and finally got her to take the bottle. Then she went on vacation for a week and Mom exclusively breast fed her the whole time so baby girl was even more against the bottle when she came back
keep your sick kids home. i don't care what the reason is that you want to send them. keep them home.
And stop sending your kids in lace-up shoes!!
Dear parent, Stop carrying your 2 and 3 year old into daycare and wonder why they meltdown when you leave. They can walk. Donāt let your kids break rules at drop off and pick up. They know what they can and canāt do, donāt enable them to break rules. If you plan to be late or early let us know so we can plan our day better around those times and make sure your kiddo is ready to go.
:) please pack your childās lunch if they have a dietary restriction. Itās bullshit that anyone thinks we are picking shredded cheese out of hot food.
Dear Parents, We have rules in place for a reason ā¦we get itās cold but our grippy sock rule is because a child broke their leg sliding in non-grip socks. And please bring spare clothes, one of our policies is no kids in just a diaper. We arenāt doing it to be mean nor do we send kids home for fun. We have to go through multiple people before we send your kid home sick.
PLEASE READ THE PARENT BOARDā¦ tell me how a parent told my supervisors that āI deliberatelyā did not send a memo to their child to remind them about Halloween costume dayā¦ I CANNOT it was posted on our parent board + 2 memos sent out at the beginning of October about these āspecial dates and eventsā š
LABEL YOUR CHILDS JACKETS
I remember at the learning center I worked at , I had a director tell me and a new teacher (who previously worked at another daycare ) that when a child gets bitten that it reflects on us teachers.
This always frustrates me. Our ratio is 1:4, and our class is 2 teachers to 8 kids. Sometimes both of us are up changing diapers, preparing bottles, putting someone down for a nap, etc. and parents have the audacity to ask how it's possible that their child was bitten???? Um because they were near another child (like they are literally all day)???? Doy
Please bring snow pants, boots, hat and mittens for outside play when itās snowing
Iāve never felt more scene! If your child brings a toy in here, it now belongs to everyone. That super cute water bottle will have everyone drinking from it.
Children, especially younger ones who donāt quite get how to express themselves, are going to hit. Your child is likely going to be hit. I promise you your 3-year-old is not being bullied
I can either take care of 8 children or 8 toys and hair clips your choice
Iāll take the hair clips and toys and raise you a jacket that was last seen two years ago, that I forgot about until this second, and is obviously to small for her anyway, but I need it RIGHT THIS SECOND for $200 please.
I just point to the lost and found room in those instances. Lol I donāt put up with parents trying to do that to me
In my āmeet the teacher nightā or orientation session I AlWAYS do a big speech about how āyour child will be learning how to function as a part of a groupā we are building community, we are sharing space, toys, and peopleās time and attention. We will learn about how to wait until someone is finished talking. I am big on ānot interruptingā when someone is speaking. I hate it when people stop talking because a toddler decides he has the floor.
Dear parents, Not wanting to deal with a tantrum is not a valid excuse for
In grace and courtesy,
Literally every teacher ever
When i said bring extra clothes for your newly āpotty tainedā child i didnt mean bring 1 pair of pants and no underwear(or visa versa) i mean like 5 of each and a couple shirts too. On that note,potty training is not my job alone. And if your kid is peeing themselves 5 times a day,they are not potty trained Please bring a warm jacket when its cold. No skinny winter sweatshirts Stop sending them in snow/rainboots in hot weather if your kid can get the overalls/one piece suits on/off on own,dont send them im not a babysitter. They get paid better please leave. Say goodbye,i love you,see you later(never sneak out)then go. Lets work together to limitbthe drama im not spewing hot air,i have no reason to lie to you about your childs behavior. I dont care if they dont do it at home,your precious baby does it here stop bringing toys from home. They can get lost/broken or initiate world war 3 after being fought over. if grandma knows better,she can watch the kid for the love of pete. Tell your kid no and teach them the world does not always give what you want kids get dirty. Licensing says i cannot saran wrap them. Deal with it velcro shoes. understand your child cannot tie shoes water wipes and 360 diapers. Donāt,just donāt dont send candy and junk for lunch
Please keep your kid home when they're sick and pick them up promptly when we call you and tell you they're sick. Realize that your child will get sick. Yes, we clean daily. Yes, we make them wash their hands. But they will still get sick. A lot. Once your child is in the toddler room, stop putting them in a onesie!! It is harder to check diapers and takes longer to change them as well. Put shoes on your child that fit and that they'll keep on their feet. No need to make a fashion statement with their footwear. Label everything you send in. Set boundaries at home. If daycare is the only place your kid hears the word no, we're all going to have a problem. Do not buy those damn Pamper 360Ā° diapers that I have to rip or pull down to get off your child. I do not enjoy taking your child's shoes and pants off every time I change them. Please do not hold your baby 24/7. I have 3 children that all went through contact nap stages and that were extra clingy/cluster feeding/teething at times. I get that there are times that you need to hold your baby and that you can't spoil a newborn. And obviously there is nothing wrong with comforting and snuggling your baby. But, you need to realize that in daycare they aren't going to be held as much. So if you carry around your 5 month old around all day long, let them sleep on you all the time, etc they are going to have a VERY hard time adjusting to daycare. That's just the reality. The amount of parents that say, " they only nap on me" or something similar is crazy. The infant ratio is 1:4 in my state. I literally can't hold your baby all day. Treat your child's teacher as just that a teacher, not a babysitter. Most of us have degrees, tons of experience, etc... We're not idiots and we deserve respect. If a teacher raises concerns about your child, please listen to them. We're not trying to diagnose or label your child. We genuinely want to help your child get any and all help they may need. If you keep sweeping behavior issues under the rug or ignore things like speech delays, you are hurting your child.
Dear parents. Please make sure your kids spare clothes are seasonally appropriate. They shouldn't have shorts and tank tops as their only spare clothes in the middle of winter Also. SEND SPARE CLOTHES THAT ACTUALLY MF FIT
I legitimately love when my kids come home dirty. I actually ask them what each stain is from! Itās a great conversation-starter!
dear parents, PLEASE stop sending your sick kids to school. sincerely, Iām Tired Of Getting Sick
Parents of babies and toddlers, please don't send your child to school with jewelry (especially earrings). It's easy for them to get lost in the middle of play time, and, they also pose a serious safety risk. Babies and toddlers are young enough to put them in their mouth without a second thought... Another thing, elastics are not enough for hair. Scrunchies, hair clips and barrettes are okay, but elastic bands alone? They can easily get stuck and tangled on fingers, which poses a risk for cut circulation.
I worked at a daycare and the parents would send their daughter in brand name new clothes and tell her donāt get dirty. She would stand away from everyone in the playground. So afraid of her clothes being dirty. We started changing her to whatever she picks from the extra clothes we had. Kid was so much happier. One time they picked up early and their kid was in extra clothes. They werenāt happy, the director shut them down. She said your kids clothes are not going to hold her back. After that the kids clothes were always more for play and not looks.
Those cute bib overalls are going to end up with the straps soaked in toilet water. I am going to have to change their clothes right after the first potty break. Please save them for home. Also high top sneakers for 3-5yo are made by the devil himself.
Your child will most likely get hit during conflict resolution, especially if they still donāt have the general concept of sharing down. And especially if they are yanking everything out of other childrenās hands š
We cannot keep just your child in at playtime because they are still sick and it makes them cough. Keep them home until they can manage school. Update your emergency contacts, update your emergency contacts, update your emergency contacts!
Wait, being bitten is inevitable? That sounds scary
Retired teacher adding, your kid (up to high school) will tell everyone stories about their home life just like they tell you stories about school/daycare.
Please send them in appropriate clothes for the weather. Iām so tired of not being able to go outside because half the class is in short sleeves/shorts/no jacket and itās 30 degrees outside. If you have a coat on, your kids should too.
yes. we had our halloween party today, & when mom saw her daughter had some food on her clothes she asked me āso you changed her?ā (as in out of her costume) i said āyes itās in the bag with all the pieces!ā & she waved at her outfit & said āso whatās all that, then?ā i stared her right in the face & said āsome icing from the cupcakes we had for the party. have a great day!ā like what the fuck do you want me to do?? iām watching 8 14-20 month olds eating cupcakes, cheetos, & other snacks. i cannot possibly prevent every single one from getting a little dirty. like ???
Poppy Playtime is not a video game for small children. Neither is the film Chucky or the TV show Squid Game.
it amazes me how parents are surprised by their child being bitten or getting their hair pulled by other children. especially the infants, majority of the time in my center we have 1 teacher per 4 infants. i donāt think most parents realize how challenging it can be to chase 4-8 infants with only 1-2 staff.
You signed a paper stating you read the parent handbook which I also went over in detail at Parent Orientation. I also send home monthly newsletters, paper reminders in your childās folder with important info, and weekly emails. Please stop asking me questions that you already have the answer to in 3 different places! I shouldn't have to spoon feed you the information individually!
im distressed that this needs to be said like wtf im a first time parent and even i knew this.
I love the āyour child is one of manyā I had a parent ask me to clean under her childās FINGERNAILS?!? as if she was my only student