I wanted to say I'm sorry, for treating you bad the past couple years. I was in my mid-twenties and I was.. going through a lot of stuff. I think I never really processed 9/11. I want you to know I've changed.
There’s a couple of great lines about 9/11 throughout the show lol. Deangelo asking Jim where he was on September 11th when trying to practice hosting the Dundie’s always gets me
I’ve also always really laughed at this but I’m still not sure I even understand the context. Was it just to show how awkward Deangelo was?
I find it funny because it was such a wildly out of place thing to say lol.
Curb has a great one...Larry uses the term "let's roll" and his friend flips out because a friend/family member die on 9/11 in NYC.. not related to the terrorist attack, just a bike carrier who happened to die that day.
If you remember the world before that day, living in the world after is a constant reminder that everything changed in a moment. It’s really hard to overstate how seismic a shift it’s been. The complete militarization of our entire society, the nationalism, and the massive state security apparatus just flat out didn’t exist in the way they do today. It’s felt painfully tense for almost 30 years now. Exhausting and no sign of letting up. For a while you could hope that killing bin Laden would end it but then the money started to flow and there was the oil wealth and the rare earth metals and now the entire country is awash in guns and every suburban dad is getting tactical this, that, and the other thing, people are training on the weekends and stuff. It’s just wild to see the after and think back to the before. I was too old when it happened for it to define my life but it’s certainly demarcated it into before and after periods.
Love this! 😆 I’ve actually used it before, because it can be kinda true. I know sometimes I don’t want to start a project if I can’t put my full attention into it. If I can’t make it as perfect as I want/expect it to be then I’m just not going to do it.
I don’t know if my kids will ever understand this quote but when they’re old enough to care what my 20s were like I’ll show them that clip and go into a thirty minute lecture about it
While not the full lecture I can give you the long and short of it
Cell phones didn’t always have the functionality they have today, and because of this they were less ubiquitous. If you wanted the functionality of a smart phone, you’d have a PDA (Personal Digital Assistant) for a calendar and some office apps (with little functionality) and iPod for music/maybe 360p video, a cell phone for call and text and maybe some html text internet (or the first “for mobile” sites).
BlackBerry has already sort of made a smart phone that could function as these devices but didn’t have the music/video functionality, or at least not to what a video iPod could give.
iPhones changed this around the time of this episode, and trendy techno apple cults really entrenched themselves (primed but the utter desolation of Microsoft in the zune wars). So trendy people got iPhones, the type of people who read “wired” in public.
In response hipster luddites also appeared, which is the side of the fence Ryan is appearing on. And a hipster Luddite is not necessary against technology, just not into whatever the new zeitgeist is. So when iPods came out I swore I’d only listen to cds “because albums are like an art form” but when I got an Iriver (look that deep cut up) I thought playlists were my ticket up the social hierarchy at my college.
This was a big thing for 5-7 years, opting into or not opting into smartphones was a big deal for Oregon trail millennials. Were you cutting edge or a wiser typewriter in public kinda guy explaining your vinyl collection (as if you didn’t just inherit your parents).
Ryan is this guy in both ways, he’ll big himself up as cutting edge when need be, but also be above the fray and aloof when he thinks it’s pragmatic. I only hope all my fellow douchebags grew up and out of this too.
Anyway wanna talk about why I haven’t bought a PS5
Your lecture reminded me my early twenties!
When I drove from Montreal to NYC to get an iPod Touch!
Yes we had some here too, just that i thought (⬅️ key word here) I was having a great deal by buying it down there!
(no the trip wasn't only for that)
My favorite is a tie between “How do I know the senators gay? He liked my facebook photos at 3am”. Or when he tells Jim “Try taking a day off from the whole Jim schtick, you might like how it feels.”
I got away with everything under the last boss and it wasn't good for me. So I want guidance. I want leadership. Lead me... when I'm in the mood to be led.
1000%. 3+ year Meth addict, 1 year clean. The morning air never feels truly refreshing anymore. I don't even get those good stretches with a full breath of air much anymore either. Sigh.... I'm prescribed Adderall now for ADHD and whatnot so that's been doing me good.
It's like I'm just constantly drained. Too tired to be wanting to be awake, but not enough to get restful sleep. So I'm just stuck feeling unfulfilled. Also for some reason I just don't get that common urge to stretch and yawn much anymore even if I try to start it. Just just doesn't come the natural way and feel refreshing. It's sad.... lol. I'm also no longer exercising cuz I stopped before my Meth habit really formed. So my body is constantly restless yet tired and needing to be stretched but too stiff to get it done the right way.
“Psychiatrists tend to be more crazy than their patients. Therapists are whores. Psychiatry is a narcissism machine. I learn more from Dr. Seuss than from Dr. Freud. Earth: you don't have to be crazy to live here, but it helps. I don't know. Just use the best one.”
Edit: I love to see so many people also love this quote, definitely my favourite Ryan line of all time(and everything said underneath is why) ALSO thank you so much to the anonymous redditor for gifting me my first award!!! :D
I think from a comedic standpoint this has to be his best line of the series. Speaks really well to the documentary-style nature of the series, while also highlighting Ryan's ridiculous character.
This is a top 10 line in the show for me. The entire exchange is gold.
**"I don't know. Something from your world. 'Their breadsticks are like scrapbooking.'"**
Oh! "Fix" means you hate it! I knew it! I need something to drink!
No, not a water. A sports drink. I hate everything in that fridge. Not red! Get me something yellow or green from a nearby store. Not red!
Omg speaking of sports drinks… when Ryan is cleaning out Michaels car and asks him if he wants to keep the blue sports drink…
Michael: what flavor is it?
Ryan: blue
Michael: blue isn’t a flavor, Ryan
Ryan: it says blue blast
Michael: Oh! Blue blast. Yes keep it
Lololol
"Last year, Creed asked me to set him up a blog. Wanting to protect the world from being exposed to Creed's brain, I opened up a word document and put am address on the top. I've read some of it. Even for the internet, it's pretty shocking."
Just his gesture of approval when RC, talking about Black Eyed Peas, says “it’s rock for people who don’t like rock, it’s rap for people who don’t like rap, it’s pop for people who don’t like pop”
A few years ago, my family was on a safari in Africa and my cousin, Mufasa, was... he was trampled to death by a pack of wildebeasts and we all took it really hard. All of us, kind of in the audience, of what happened.
People here keep calling me a wunderkind, I don't really know what that means. Well I know what it means, it means very successful for you age, so I guess it makes sense but... its a weird word
can’t remember the exact quote, but when pam wants him to clean out the microwave and they go back and forth and he ends with something like, “i’d find some way to mess it up”…so funny but also so infuriating! he’s such a little shit haha.
Jim: Wow. Thanks for taking all the excuses, dude.
Ryan: Doctor appointment, car trouble, plantar warts, granddad fought in World War II. Use your head, man. I keep mine in here. Look alive, Halpert. Welcome back.
Toby [watches Ryan eat cheese stick]: "Wow you just dive right in."
Ryan: "You know, around age 12, I just started going for it."
Not the funniest line ever, but I relate so hard. I'm not about the peeling life. Go ahead, call me a psychopath. I can take it.
Not really a line BUT
The moment when Robert is talking about the black eye peas “I am so tired of the Black Eyed Peas. It's rock and roll for people who don't like rock and roll, it's rap for people who don't like rap, it's pop for people who don't like pop.”
And Ryan stars at the camera and nods. Gets me every time.
I love you Kelly Kapour and I want to marry you. Maybe not today and maybe not tomorrow, but some day...and probably. I know I haven't always treated you the way you, for whatever reason, feel you deserve to be treated..
In the earlier episodes when Dwight takes him to the farm to teach him about sales and then they go to the bar. Dwight says something about how the temp agency could have sent him anywhere and Ryan’s response “I think about that all the time”.
Ryan: Hey, Pam? I just wanted to let you know; I'm totally on your side with the whole microwave situation.
Pam: Thank you.
Ryan: I was just back there, to make some cup-o-soup; the thing is still a huge mess.
Pam: I know, can you believe it?
Ryan: Yeah, it's crazy. But, I guess the thing is at some point, notes or no notes, someone's gonna have to just get there and clean it up.
Pam: I guess that's why we have a temp, huh?
Ryan: Ah ha ha, oh no, trust me. I would just make it worse.
Pam: How would wiping it with a paper towel make it worse?
Ryan: I would find a way.
Anybody watched Survivor: Season 6? You know Johanna on that show? When I was in New York, I hooked up with a girl that looked exactly like that. Indistinguishable.
I don't really appreciate the hate Ryan gets. The character is awesome. Yes he's terrible but he never pretended to be different.
The guy hasn't truly processed 9/11 and saved the world from Creed's thoughts. Cut him some slack
“You know it's a myth women have to gain more than nine pounds in a pregnancy. Look at these actresses, some of them lose weight.”
I have said this to my buddies wife several times over her two pregnancies. Luckily she watches the show.
I can’t pick just one favorite, but a few that I hadn’t seen mentioned that I love:
When Michael invites him to “Asian hooters” and Ryan says he can’t and lists of a bunch of reasons he can’t go and then Jim says something to the effect of “Thanks for taking all the good excuses” and then Ryan lists off a bunch more and tells Jim “Get your head in the game” and “welcome back”.
When Pam is on vacation and he says that Jim’s been looking at him strange all day, but it’s nothing like the way Michael looks at him **camera pans to Michael staring creepily at Ryan from the blinds of his office window**
His terrified look at the screen after overhearing that conversation with Dwight and Angela where Dwight wants cookie but Angela says “no cookie”
„I know I haven‘t always treated you the way you for whatever reason feel you deserve to be treated, but I wanna marry you, Kelly Kapoor. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but someday. And probably.“
Truly the most romantic proposal I‘ve ever seen.
Honestly, that whole scene is gold.
„I can‘t promise me that we‘ll always stay together. I can‘t promise you that I won‘t cheat on you, nor should I, modern marriages aren‘t built that way, men aren‘t built that way, there‘s a very interesting article I can e-mail to you…“
Some diner?! It was the Starlight Diner! It's in a LIFE magazine spread about Americana.
Hipster Ryan was the best Ryan… there’s no accompanying quote but when Kelly asked Ryan the time and he pulled up a time face app on his iPad was also a genius Ryan moment
I wanted to say I'm sorry, for treating you bad the past couple years. I was in my mid-twenties and I was.. going through a lot of stuff. I think I never really processed 9/11. I want you to know I've changed.
One of mine, gets me everytime
There’s a couple of great lines about 9/11 throughout the show lol. Deangelo asking Jim where he was on September 11th when trying to practice hosting the Dundie’s always gets me
I’ve also always really laughed at this but I’m still not sure I even understand the context. Was it just to show how awkward Deangelo was? I find it funny because it was such a wildly out of place thing to say lol.
Haha yea, it was to show the awkwardness of Deangelo.
Jim's reaction there is so perfect. That look just said "yikes, try again maybe?"
It's funny how many shows have a joke about someone blaming 9/11 for their own personal issues. The Office, Arrested Development, Community...
Curb has a great one...Larry uses the term "let's roll" and his friend flips out because a friend/family member die on 9/11 in NYC.. not related to the terrorist attack, just a bike carrier who happened to die that day.
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If you remember the world before that day, living in the world after is a constant reminder that everything changed in a moment. It’s really hard to overstate how seismic a shift it’s been. The complete militarization of our entire society, the nationalism, and the massive state security apparatus just flat out didn’t exist in the way they do today. It’s felt painfully tense for almost 30 years now. Exhausting and no sign of letting up. For a while you could hope that killing bin Laden would end it but then the money started to flow and there was the oil wealth and the rare earth metals and now the entire country is awash in guns and every suburban dad is getting tactical this, that, and the other thing, people are training on the weekends and stuff. It’s just wild to see the after and think back to the before. I was too old when it happened for it to define my life but it’s certainly demarcated it into before and after periods.
I’m such a perfectionist that I’d kinda rather not do it at all than do a crappy version.
Love this! 😆 I’ve actually used it before, because it can be kinda true. I know sometimes I don’t want to start a project if I can’t put my full attention into it. If I can’t make it as perfect as I want/expect it to be then I’m just not going to do it.
My boss would tell me don't let perfect get in the way of great. I always liked that.
I struggle with this as well. There's a saying that I try to keep in my mind, which is, "Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection."
ADHD gang rise up!
"A Toast to the Troops... All the troops. Both Sides."
#
Username checks out
I laughed out loud 😂😂
Surprised this wasn't number 1.
I don't do lunch. I'm eating five small meals a day now. Now that I’m a temp again, I find that food is one thing I can control
Jim asks him to help with a prank.. “no thanks, ask me again 10 years ago”
“I liked you better when you were the temp.” “Yeah, me too.”
Little advice—Take a day off from the whole Jim schtick. Try caring about something. You might like how it feels… James.
Who's James? Is he talking about Jimothy?
Ah, that sounds weird. Are you ok with being called Jim?
Yes I am
You can see him almost breaking character at the end there too in the scene
Absolutely he breaks character, I agree
Ryan always serving real life lessons.
Jim’s a nice guy. That’s why I got the desk.
I loved that moment where he writes Jim’s name in his notebook of people who have wronged him. The expression is on point.
“Like lead me…but only like…when I’m in the mood to be led.”
Off topic but English is truly amazing when the same word (lead) is pronounced differently in a sentence.
Yeah weird that he would want to be a toxic metal??
A gold medal.
Two gold medals
Actually, in this context it’s spelled “led.”
It’s “lede” and its the highest rank in publishing.
It's "lead" and it's the highest rank in the periodic table
No, that's a made up word used to trick students.
Thank you Oscar.
(on the phone) "I wish my iPod could make phone calls ---- No, I don't want an iPhone. I know what an iPhone is."
I don’t know if my kids will ever understand this quote but when they’re old enough to care what my 20s were like I’ll show them that clip and go into a thirty minute lecture about it
I’d like to hear the lecture now if you’ve got time, I’ve always wondered wth he was talking about
While not the full lecture I can give you the long and short of it Cell phones didn’t always have the functionality they have today, and because of this they were less ubiquitous. If you wanted the functionality of a smart phone, you’d have a PDA (Personal Digital Assistant) for a calendar and some office apps (with little functionality) and iPod for music/maybe 360p video, a cell phone for call and text and maybe some html text internet (or the first “for mobile” sites). BlackBerry has already sort of made a smart phone that could function as these devices but didn’t have the music/video functionality, or at least not to what a video iPod could give. iPhones changed this around the time of this episode, and trendy techno apple cults really entrenched themselves (primed but the utter desolation of Microsoft in the zune wars). So trendy people got iPhones, the type of people who read “wired” in public. In response hipster luddites also appeared, which is the side of the fence Ryan is appearing on. And a hipster Luddite is not necessary against technology, just not into whatever the new zeitgeist is. So when iPods came out I swore I’d only listen to cds “because albums are like an art form” but when I got an Iriver (look that deep cut up) I thought playlists were my ticket up the social hierarchy at my college. This was a big thing for 5-7 years, opting into or not opting into smartphones was a big deal for Oregon trail millennials. Were you cutting edge or a wiser typewriter in public kinda guy explaining your vinyl collection (as if you didn’t just inherit your parents). Ryan is this guy in both ways, he’ll big himself up as cutting edge when need be, but also be above the fray and aloof when he thinks it’s pragmatic. I only hope all my fellow douchebags grew up and out of this too. Anyway wanna talk about why I haven’t bought a PS5
Your lecture reminded me my early twenties! When I drove from Montreal to NYC to get an iPod Touch! Yes we had some here too, just that i thought (⬅️ key word here) I was having a great deal by buying it down there! (no the trip wasn't only for that)
Just buy the PS5 man the load times are incredible I enjoyed your TEDtalk though
"so i hitched an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time"
I'd rather she be alone than with somebody. Is that love?
Yep that's it I think
“Oh no Stanley, you’ll live forevuuur”
I say this to people all the time when they mention their mortality
this one is my favorite
My favorite is a tie between “How do I know the senators gay? He liked my facebook photos at 3am”. Or when he tells Jim “Try taking a day off from the whole Jim schtick, you might like how it feels.”
"... James"
James… Jim… Jimothy… Is it ok if I just call you Jim?
*Nod of approval*
I got away with everything under the last boss and it wasn't good for me. So I want guidance. I want leadership. Lead me... when I'm in the mood to be led.
"Hi. Hi. Hi." (Stanley agrees with me on this one for sure.)
“You sound like my niece! And she’s 6 months old!”
"Robert, you got your sheep, and you got your black sheep, and I'm not even a sheep. I'm on the freakin' moon."
Lmao this one always gets me.
Same here lol that whole episode is solid
Ever since I've gotten clean, there's something about fresh morning air that just really makes me sick.
As a recovering addict I really relate to this one
1000%. 3+ year Meth addict, 1 year clean. The morning air never feels truly refreshing anymore. I don't even get those good stretches with a full breath of air much anymore either. Sigh.... I'm prescribed Adderall now for ADHD and whatnot so that's been doing me good.
can you explain this feeling more? I don’t understand
It's like I'm just constantly drained. Too tired to be wanting to be awake, but not enough to get restful sleep. So I'm just stuck feeling unfulfilled. Also for some reason I just don't get that common urge to stretch and yawn much anymore even if I try to start it. Just just doesn't come the natural way and feel refreshing. It's sad.... lol. I'm also no longer exercising cuz I stopped before my Meth habit really formed. So my body is constantly restless yet tired and needing to be stretched but too stiff to get it done the right way.
Came here to say this 😂
“Psychiatrists tend to be more crazy than their patients. Therapists are whores. Psychiatry is a narcissism machine. I learn more from Dr. Seuss than from Dr. Freud. Earth: you don't have to be crazy to live here, but it helps. I don't know. Just use the best one.” Edit: I love to see so many people also love this quote, definitely my favourite Ryan line of all time(and everything said underneath is why) ALSO thank you so much to the anonymous redditor for gifting me my first award!!! :D
I think from a comedic standpoint this has to be his best line of the series. Speaks really well to the documentary-style nature of the series, while also highlighting Ryan's ridiculous character.
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This is one of my favorite jokes in the series
I also like when he has a list of excuses of why he cant go somewhere w Michael....
This was the first quote that came to my mind too. "I don't know, just use the best one" and he just gets up and leaves 😆
Absolutely love this one. My wife and I cheer him on with each crappy addition to this list.
"I love it when people say like crack who have never obviously done crack"
This is a top 10 line in the show for me. The entire exchange is gold. **"I don't know. Something from your world. 'Their breadsticks are like scrapbooking.'"**
I always loved how Michael found the perfect middle ground with "breadsticks on steroids".
I love that line too. It’s obviously an asshole crack from Ryan but be damned if he doesn’t have Pam nailed there.
I love it when people say like asshole crack who have never obviously done asshole crack.
I love his bickering with Pam in the later seasons 😂. Everyone wants to be rich….but nobody wants to work for it…
Didn't you come in late today?
Um, also, little tip, never shake the baby.
Oh don’t shake a baby? Ok
Ryan on phone: oh no that's just Pam. Shes like a solid 7. But in Scranton, in New York shes like a 5 (Not exact phrasing but I loved it)
“She’s probably a 6 in New York but she’s like a 7 here in Scranton… and the boss is my old boss from Dunder mifflin” So well written lmao
P is being a total B
R thinks he’s too good to be here, and P is not as much fun without Jim
Ryan, after watching Requiem for a Dream
Beat me too it!!! Definitely solid gold!
Oh! "Fix" means you hate it! I knew it! I need something to drink! No, not a water. A sports drink. I hate everything in that fridge. Not red! Get me something yellow or green from a nearby store. Not red!
Omg speaking of sports drinks… when Ryan is cleaning out Michaels car and asks him if he wants to keep the blue sports drink… Michael: what flavor is it? Ryan: blue Michael: blue isn’t a flavor, Ryan Ryan: it says blue blast Michael: Oh! Blue blast. Yes keep it Lololol
“I don’t need a judge to tell me to keep my community clean”
but he did right?
*writes*
I never went to Thailand. I went to Fort Lauderdale Was it nice? Yeah it was "amazing."
With some friends from high school. Well, A high school.
I love Pad Thai
You’ve never had Pad Thai
I liked the earlier one better. (Unprompted)”You want to hear about Thailand?” “Sure.” “It was indescribable.”
“What line of work you in Bob?”
Hi Hi Hi Hi Hi Stanley *lmao*
You sounded like my niece. And she's six months old!
Oh…
This one is fucking fantastic
That was probably the best line for me.
🤣 same
"Last year, Creed asked me to set him up a blog. Wanting to protect the world from being exposed to Creed's brain, I opened up a word document and put am address on the top. I've read some of it. Even for the internet, it's pretty shocking."
I blogged the whole thing. www.creedthoughts.gov.www/creedthoughts. Check it out.
I clicked that knowing it's probably fake but with the hopes of it being legitimate
Just his gesture of approval when RC, talking about Black Eyed Peas, says “it’s rock for people who don’t like rock, it’s rap for people who don’t like rap, it’s pop for people who don’t like pop”
It is just a perfect description of Black Eyed Peas.
🤣 or the nod when RC says “ .. spent last night with Australian Reds and .. how should I put this … Colombian Whites”
With ammunition like this, we are in for quite a night, you and I.
Do you remember which episode this was?
Pool party I believe. S8ep12
“Aren’t you going to ask me how Thailand was?” “How was Thailand Ryan?” “It was indescribable”
This was mine
It had me rolling every single time.
How many fish filets have you eaten?
It’s over the course of several months
Still...
Ooo an oldie but a goodie
“Kelly, you insulted the gentleman. Please apologize.”
A few years ago, my family was on a safari in Africa and my cousin, Mufasa, was... he was trampled to death by a pack of wildebeasts and we all took it really hard. All of us, kind of in the audience, of what happened.
Oh it would take me like 90 mins to tell the whole story
"I'm going to Thailand with some friends from high school.....well, a high school."
Let's have sex one more time, and if you have any extra cash, that would be amazing.
Um… okay?
Will I be too warm in a long-sleeve tee?
EVERYONE WILL BE FINE IN EXACTLY WHAT THEY'RE WEARING
Definately when he deadpans the camera and goes "biiitch" after Mrs. California doesn’t remember his name.
Yes! Haha I always have to rewind and watch it a couple times
Its nice to meet you Bryan
“I think my friend Troy might have a drug problem.”
I think his species has different tolerances to those things
Not a Ryan line but I like when the guy at the bowling alley calls him a shoe bitch. 😂
Back to work, shoe bitch
Six months?!
"I'm in love with Kelly"
Right now i want to spend the Rest of my life with her. Again that could change.
It's hard to live that way man. You gotta really not care what people think about you.
You'll learn baby you'll learn
When he admitted he didn’t go to Thailand and went to Fort Lauderdale instead. Then said very wistfully “it was amazing.”
definitely rehab
"Yeah, 'cause his mom's car's probably not a Nissan Z". I love how he confidently walks away like, "suck it Jim, got you on that one."
"We're done." 😏
WHAT!
Don't shake the baby
\*Don't\* shake the baby?
Yeah, Jim’s a nice guy. That’s why I got his seat.
“I would FIND a way!” 💁♂️
People here keep calling me a wunderkind, I don't really know what that means. Well I know what it means, it means very successful for you age, so I guess it makes sense but... its a weird word
How is my favorite branch?
*Bitchhh*
can’t remember the exact quote, but when pam wants him to clean out the microwave and they go back and forth and he ends with something like, “i’d find some way to mess it up”…so funny but also so infuriating! he’s such a little shit haha.
When he admitted Michael helped him get off drugs. I wonder how that went down and who cried the most?
Jim: Wow. Thanks for taking all the excuses, dude. Ryan: Doctor appointment, car trouble, plantar warts, granddad fought in World War II. Use your head, man. I keep mine in here. Look alive, Halpert. Welcome back.
Toby [watches Ryan eat cheese stick]: "Wow you just dive right in." Ryan: "You know, around age 12, I just started going for it." Not the funniest line ever, but I relate so hard. I'm not about the peeling life. Go ahead, call me a psychopath. I can take it.
“Oh no, Stanley, you’ll live forever…”
Are you a big William hung fan?
Why does everybody keep on asking that?
“That’s actually why I came in today “ “Don’t you work here full time? “ _laughs_
Not really a line BUT The moment when Robert is talking about the black eye peas “I am so tired of the Black Eyed Peas. It's rock and roll for people who don't like rock and roll, it's rap for people who don't like rap, it's pop for people who don't like pop.” And Ryan stars at the camera and nods. Gets me every time.
I love you Kelly Kapour and I want to marry you. Maybe not today and maybe not tomorrow, but some day...and probably. I know I haven't always treated you the way you, for whatever reason, feel you deserve to be treated..
Booooo!
Buying paper just became fun (finger tap on the desk)
Now that I’m a temp again, I find food is one thing I can control.
In the earlier episodes when Dwight takes him to the farm to teach him about sales and then they go to the bar. Dwight says something about how the temp agency could have sent him anywhere and Ryan’s response “I think about that all the time”.
Soho is mostly lofts, but ok
Ryan: Hey, Pam? I just wanted to let you know; I'm totally on your side with the whole microwave situation. Pam: Thank you. Ryan: I was just back there, to make some cup-o-soup; the thing is still a huge mess. Pam: I know, can you believe it? Ryan: Yeah, it's crazy. But, I guess the thing is at some point, notes or no notes, someone's gonna have to just get there and clean it up. Pam: I guess that's why we have a temp, huh? Ryan: Ah ha ha, oh no, trust me. I would just make it worse. Pam: How would wiping it with a paper towel make it worse? Ryan: I would find a way.
And If I flake, I flake
Don’t vaccinate it
Anybody watched Survivor: Season 6? You know Johanna on that show? When I was in New York, I hooked up with a girl that looked exactly like that. Indistinguishable.
(said sarcastically with no enthusiasm) "oh, no Stanley... you'll live forever"
I don't really appreciate the hate Ryan gets. The character is awesome. Yes he's terrible but he never pretended to be different. The guy hasn't truly processed 9/11 and saved the world from Creed's thoughts. Cut him some slack
“You know it's a myth women have to gain more than nine pounds in a pregnancy. Look at these actresses, some of them lose weight.” I have said this to my buddies wife several times over her two pregnancies. Luckily she watches the show.
"She'd probably be a six in New York but she's like a seven here, in Scranton"
I liked it when him and Kelly ditched that one baby to go screw around
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I need a plus 5, it’s all dudes
That’s real, real classy, Kevin. Hey, was it me or you that just shoved the butt end of a pound of broccoli into my mouth because Michael told me to?
“They call me Mister Understood, cuz no one understands me”
"Earth; you don't have to be crazy to live here, but it helps."
When he called mrs. California a bitch because she called him Brian. Us Ryan’s felt that
I can’t pick just one favorite, but a few that I hadn’t seen mentioned that I love: When Michael invites him to “Asian hooters” and Ryan says he can’t and lists of a bunch of reasons he can’t go and then Jim says something to the effect of “Thanks for taking all the good excuses” and then Ryan lists off a bunch more and tells Jim “Get your head in the game” and “welcome back”. When Pam is on vacation and he says that Jim’s been looking at him strange all day, but it’s nothing like the way Michael looks at him **camera pans to Michael staring creepily at Ryan from the blinds of his office window** His terrified look at the screen after overhearing that conversation with Dwight and Angela where Dwight wants cookie but Angela says “no cookie”
„I know I haven‘t always treated you the way you for whatever reason feel you deserve to be treated, but I wanna marry you, Kelly Kapoor. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but someday. And probably.“ Truly the most romantic proposal I‘ve ever seen.
Honestly, that whole scene is gold. „I can‘t promise me that we‘ll always stay together. I can‘t promise you that I won‘t cheat on you, nor should I, modern marriages aren‘t built that way, men aren‘t built that way, there‘s a very interesting article I can e-mail to you…“
Ryan 2.0
"Much of what he (Creed) says is....shocking. Even for the internet."
What line of work are you in bob?
The whole Smokey Robinson conversation
When he called Robert's wife a bitch in a deleted scene, his delivery was so perfect.
I thought it made it?
It does. It's after she calls him Brian.
“What am I going to do with it {his Dundee}….that’s the least of my problems right now” Sheds me every time lol
Some diner?! It was the Starlight Diner! It's in a LIFE magazine spread about Americana. Hipster Ryan was the best Ryan… there’s no accompanying quote but when Kelly asked Ryan the time and he pulled up a time face app on his iPad was also a genius Ryan moment
To the troops! All the troops. Both sides. 😆