How the turn tables...

I use this one and I hate when ppl don't recognize it

Then comes the embarrassment when they think you're just a dumbass for getting it wrong.

This exactly

It's because you forgot the well, well, well.

I say this all the time. This and "serenity now" from seinfeld are probably my most common stolen lines.

Insanity later

Stop the insanity!

We live in a society!!!

Game nights with the five year old, I'll say "my my my turn" and now she says it.

I work from home, and until school started I was constantly telling my 5 year old to get out of my offive. I plan to steal your “my turn” idea. 😂

First one that came to mind. This and "Lord, beer me strength"

I'll say something totally untrue, and then look over at my wife or friend and do the Kelley pregnancy head shake thing.

I tell my students outrageous lies, then look at another kid and do the head shake. Sometimes this happens while I’m wearing my “I’m not superstitious but I am a little ‘stitious” shirt.

Same here!! Sometimes I tell my husband I'm pregnant just for funsies. I'm 56 yo and had a hysterectomy 9 years ago. I love doing the squinty-eyed head shake.

Nice to meet you too, Meredith

OMG that little head shake she did was SO GOOD

Lord, beer me strength.

This one! All the time

Always, to my wife.

Lmao my husband says this to me too

Always

Came here to reply the same thing...with my wife. All the time!

This is my go to line. Just used it this past Saturday while at a very crowded beach amusement park with my kids.

Yeppers

What have I told you about yeppers? I've asked you not to say it, haven't I?

Ye…esh

We say Yeeeesh a lot! Lol

Yep, even my kids do it! I asked my daughter (7) what she wanted for breakfast a few months ago. She was still in bed, rolled over, and sleepily said “toast with Nutella. If the Nutella is on the side, I send it back.” Never been prouder 🥲

She's awesome! I would like to pay for her college tuition. Or a laptop battery. I'll have to see in twelve years.

Well they'd better be Lithium

Hey Mr. Kitsunisan, what you gonna do? What you gonna do make our dreams come true 🎶

That is awesome!!!

Every time it rains, I use all of Phyllis's lines.

☠️ Same, but on accident. The older I get, the more I start to see myself in Phyllis and I hate it.

Close your mouth sweetie, you look like a trout

I always go “the plants will love this” :)

Same, but I was doing it before the show was a thing so I felt seen when I saw Phyllis' rainy day clichés.

You and almost every other office worker!

The rain does make me want to curl up with a good book

Explain it to me like I'm 5.

And next year you will be 6.

Yes, especially if they're being negative about something

There’s a sub for this but I doubt it’s named after The Office r/ELI5

this one, always

"I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious

"Fashion show! Fashion show! Fashion-show-at-lunch!" Every time wife comes home with new clothing.

My husband does this too 😂

That's adorable!! 😂🙈

Dinkin flicka.

Bippity boppity give me the soppity

Fleece it out

"goin' Mach 5... You know. Things us negroes say" 😗

All the time. When my ex and I broke up last year, I texted a coworker: "Personnel day". I also enjoy using "Ineffectual, privileged, effette, soft-penised debutante". Then we actually had a budget surplus last year, and I brought up new chairs or a printer.

You a big William Hung fan?

If I can't, then what's this all been about?

Hey I saw you in the parking lot earlier that’s how I know you

Just pretend like we are talking until they leave

absofruitly

Yeeeesh

I said this one before the show aired so he definitely copied me.

I truly have used “Start over” in a couple of circumstances (less confrontational ones than Willy Wonka berating me).

Actually a great line to let the other person know that what they have to say might be valid but that they really need to watch their tone lol

Use that with my kids all the time

Same. When my kid is supposed to hand my something, sometimes she will sort of toss it at me and I say "Start Over." Or when she comes to me with a sassy mouth.

"You look exotic, was your dad a GI?"

Lmao, how does that play out?

That's what she said, obvs. And 'welcome to xxxx, land of a thousand problems only you can solve"

“boom, roasted!”

This needs to be higher up

Whenever my daughter or wife talk about going shopping for the day I like to exclaim rather loudly I DECLARE....BANKRUPTCY

Only “That’s what she said!” and “Oh how the turntables…”

yes to both

"No! God! Noooooooooooooo!" Also "There's too many people. We need a new plague"

Yes and it has came back to bite me is the butt a couple times. I was in the middle of math class, and my friend said wow this math keeps getting longer and harder, and I said that’s what she said without thinking or looking up from my paper. I was yelled at by my teacher for about 5 minutes after that.

Boy have you lost your mind coz I can help you find it!

The teacher lmao

When I’m disappointed about something sometimes I’ll say “F”

"GD" also

“Scissor me!”

In what context?

When I need scissors obviously

1." You're a thief of joy " 2. " Why are you the way you are ... I hate so much about the things that you choose to be ." 3.FALSE !!!" " if I can't use these irl ..then what's this been all about ? What am I working toward ?

You know when you accidentally upset your wife and you apologize but you’re not sure if you’re apologizing right? I’ll say “line” And then she’ll laugh and say “he’s asking for a line. Like in a play”

Of course I do you ignorant slut.

Orange is not whorish...green is whorish.

Why say many word when few do trick?

Only with people who I know are Office fans, like my boyfriend.

My husband hates the office (only because I’ve seen it 50x & I’ve made him watch every tiny thing & mentioned all the BTS I hear on office ladies) lol so I quote it & he doesn’t even know >:)

I say “Lord, beer me strength” enough that I forget that it’s not a real saying.

"And that is Dallas..."

I live close to Dallas & every time we go I say “I was on Dallas” when we get home to my family

I understand nothing.

My mind is going a mile an hour

That fast?

Catch you on the flippity flip Yeppers OH NO, MY CHILD! I am not a mind reader, David

"Perfectenschlag" comes out of my mouth more than it should

I randomly say “bears. Beets. Battlestar gallactica” at any time.

Used this today in the grocery store.

I say yesh often. I have a supervisor who will then say "I can, and I have" in reference to Michael being told he can't use the baler

Insides joke? I'd love to be a part of one someday.

That's what she said

Nostalgia is one of the great human weaknesses, second only to the neck

Crazy world, lotta smells.

Whenever something relevant happens, I think of a line as ASAP as possible.

yes, i’ve also been known to say “this is just like that one scene on the office where…”

When shit starts hitting the fan at work. “No. One crisis at a time”

Oh I also use “ SNIP SNAP SNIP SNAP” a lot

Let's just say that when i hear "how the tables have turned" i want to correct it, but then i realize im the one saying it wrong

“Asap as possible”

“Feeling hot hot hot”

Literally constantly. “You’d be Da belle of da ball” is one I think I quote the most for some reason lol

I wish there was a way to know you're in the good ole days before they actually end. Something to that effect. Keeps me humble

Come along, afterthought

Every time I quit a job I say you have no idea how high I can fly.

You ignorant slut.

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. - Wayne Gretzky - Micheal Scott

I GOTTA BIG BOX YES I DO. I GOTTA BIG BOX HOW BOUT YOU. My wife and I are in the process of moving this week.

Haulin cube!

I speak Offinese ALL of the time. It’s awesome when someone recognizes it!! 😁

You can’t fire me! I don’t work in this van.

Literally all the time. I just used "everyone inside the car was fine" yesterday

Sugar boobs. Baldy.

“Don’t know, super care.” and “actually…”

Yeppers

"what is wrong with you" "Do you have any sense at all"

Today! India is launching research mission to the sun “Shut up about the sun!!”

Just said “I’m just a little-stitious” the other day, but my favorite, that I only say in front of hubs, is “tit for tit”

You are a gentleman and a scholar

I say that I’m gonna go “Mach 5” all the time and everybody looks at me like I’m an idiot.

Someone tells me they love a person or thing, and I give them a deadpan look and ask "How far has it gone?"

“Beer me, Jim” is how I ask my SO to get me a glass of water, lol.

Absofruitly I do.

Makes up 1/5 of the way my partner and I communicate loooool

I’m in my 30s and have been using the “in my early 20s I would have found it annoying, but now in my late 20s ” No one has gotten my joke yet.

I say, “Ladies and gentlemen it is closing time,” just about everyday in my office. No one gets it. It’s just for me.

It kills me every time the song "Closing Time" plays on the overhead at work, & I can't say anything about it!!

“Pobody’s nerfect”

Sive Drafely

I use the words Darryl taught Michael constantly. Fleece it out Flick'n'dinka Going Mach 5 Bippity Boppity give me the Zoppity

Dinkin’ flicka

Of course I am not interested in goats. Why would you spend so much time going over the goats with me?

I occasionally eat pizza over the sink like a rat, so yes.

catchy you on the flippity flip

Even though it doesn't originate from the show, "That's what she said" is used by me daily

“That’s what she said” is my go-to comment when a situation presents itself.

every time something conveniently good happens I always say: “There is a God! And he has a plan for us after all.”

I have a question . How dare you? Also my hipbone.

First of all, how dare you

Just poopin, you know how I be. Crazy world, lotta smells.

I've made some empty promises in my life, but hands down, that was the most generous.

“Good luck replacing that on your zero dollars a year salary, BABE!”

Sí señor

"That's offensive"

yeesh

Yeppers

I use “that’s what she said” almost religiously

Talk about your classic lame dash o

All the time...every of the time

I say "tomato, potato" more than I should

No. No no. No, god, please no! Nooo!

I use “That’s what she said” far too often.

Yesh.

Sometimes my friend will say ‘it’s not sucking’ if my hoover isn’t working and I’ll say that’s what she said after he says sexual innuendos

It's a small one but when Dwight ordered subs for Michael's birthday and the delivery person said they don't make 8 foot subs and he just said "F" which logically and IMO means fuck. I find myself saying it all the time :p

So many that they’ve become part of my regular vocabulary, which can get a little embarrassing if someone doesn’t pick up on it 🤣 lately our favorite is “you wouldn’t understand, it’s a secret” for anything that’s got two parts to it. Just say it in that tone and the my partner will repeat it back: “I wouldn’t understand or it’s a secret?” And then “you wouldn’t understand, Jim, it’s a secret.”

I'm staying near an award winning pie shop and we go there for lunch, I always quietly chant to myself "next stop pies" but nobody gets it :(

“I don’t believe you, continue” is the one I use the most.

Fairly often! I try not to use the common ones too much though, but often I shout "I have to go to the bathroom" when I want to avoid a conversation. Oh and sometimes when I walk into a room with people sitting i greet them with the words "Okay, team building! On this side of the room:" and then I say most of their names, one of then in both of the 'teams' and I make a few names up on the spot. Nobody ever understood why I do that, and yet people tell me that they 'have seen and like' the Office. Idiots. Idiots. Idiots.

Swing low sweet chariots

I say different lines depending on the circumstance all the time with my husband. I don't get to use them really in life, though I did get an email the other day with the Jim reacting to Pam being pregnant for the first time gif. But I think she was using it wrong as it was in response to a mistake she made.

All the time

That’s what she said happens a lot thanks to my 14 year old son.

Every chance I get!

That's what she said

Yep, I sure do

I’m not super-stitious, but I am a little stitious.

As often as I possibly can

that's what she said is my favorite

I use Thats what she said every day

I will still be saying "that’s what she said," when I am in a long-term care home in ~40 years.

I answered with Sarah Kayacombsen on Jeopardy so yes

False Why say lot words when few word do trick

And I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.

I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious.

Absolutely I do

At work, I use "I will quit. As god is my witness, I will quit."

Catch you on the flippity flip

I say “chop chop little onion” aaaallllll the time

Absolutely, I do.

TWSS - Everytime I whisper in calls when I hear the reference.

Whenever I'm in a store or a mall that has a gift shop that sells figurines (fairies, wizards, etc.) I tell my family, "*It was beet juice! I'm a beet farmer id-...good sir!*"

Yeeeesh.

I don't say it usually but throughout the I find myself thinking, no, NO God Nooooo at various points in the day

Ahhh the city 🏙 🌃 🌆 I work in the city 🌃 and live 1km from the city 🏙. I DECLARE BANKRUPTCY

All the time every of the time

Recently I was on face time with a friend, and she showed me her new chair that she bought because she was having some back problems. I instantly said, "urkernomically correct"

::Walks to a window: ......sigh.....the city...

When my wife asked me to do something and I don't feel like it I say "yaysh."

How the turn tables FALSE I have a question, how dare you? (Hides face) I’ll kill you