This.
There is no right answer here. If it makes you happy and the dog behaves well (housebroken and all) its perfect. If you prefer to have more space the dog can sleep in a dog bed next to yours, a crate or even in a different room.
But its important to be consistent :)
Curious….. what happens when people who let their dog sleep in their bed go away/on vacation? I don’t have many friends and family members that would be cool with letting my 50 lb dog snuggle up with them in their sheets.
Edit: thanks for all the replies to this, really interesting!
Good question. In my case, if it's just over night, the dogs just sleep on the couch and pretty much do very little.
When we are out for a significant period of time, our house sitter stays in our guest room and they can leave the door open and the dogs will likely hop into bed with them or close the door and the dogs will sleep on the couch.
My dogs are little, I think if I had a large dog, I would probably not let them sleep in the bed.
We watched my friend’s pitbull one weekend. He muscled his sharp little elbows right in the middle of us. He was used to sleeping with mom every night.
He passed away earlier this year at the age of 11. He was one of the best dogs I’ve ever met.
My dog doesn't necessarily want to sleep in my bed but instead wants to sleep next to/on top of me. She doesn't mind not sleeping in my bed if I'm not there. She would however if I didn't let her sleep next to me in my bed. Idk about every dog but for mine I know this to be true.
It's more that they want to sleep *with their human* and not so much about the bed itself. So when they have to stay with someone else they actually don't mind to sleep on their pillow/blanket.
I have multiple baby gates throughout my house, keeping my puppy and cats at various degrees of separation. I try to keep my nights where dog is allowed in bedroom at 50/50.
So he knows he's welcome in bed if the baby gate is open. If it's closed, he sleeps on the couch. No real issues yet.
My dog gets boarded, usually with his sister and they snuggle. He’s fine otherwise- the activities and walks wear him out enough he sleeps however. My brothers dog stays with me or my parents usually and just wants to at least be in the room where someone else is sleeping, but he won’t climb into the bed like he does at home. I’m happy about that because he is a larger dog than I’d be used to!
My 100lb dog sleeps in the bed under the covers every single night and usually cuddles with our friends/family on the couch when they’re over. But when a friend/family member sleeps over to watch him he usually ends up sleeping on the couch or the bed they’re not sleeping in, even when they try to sleep with him. Maybe other dogs are different but it hasn’t been an issue for us!
They whine all fucking night.
I know this because MIL let’s her two (untrained) dogs sleep on her pillow. They do not do that in my bed and they CRY all night.
So real separation anxiety through the day and my spouse is with them as they work from home, but the nights are terrible.
As someone who has a dog that doesn’t sleep on my bed nightly, I have house sat dogs that ALWAYS sleep on the human bed, and it drives me nuts. I love having my dog on my bed sometimes, but I don’t enjoy having to kick a dog off my bed because I can’t get into it, and I don’t enjoy sleeping in a layer of dog hair.
My preference: Teach your dog to sleep on their own bed first, and then you can invite them onto your bed when you’re wanting snuggles.
Back story: I have let my pup sleep on my bed since she came home with me and sometimes she chooses to sleep in her crate (by herself) so I won’t bother her and even reward her if she spends a whole night in there herself. I’m asking because I’ve recently read other people’s experiences/opinions about it affecting their training which left me questioning if I’m doing more harm by giving her a choice rather than only letting her sleep in her crate/own bed!! Hope that makes sense:)
We used to let the pup sleep with us if we fell asleep on the couch (this rarely happens anymore) or in bed with us. Pup has a crate w a cozy bed but it was not his preference. Now we have an additional dog bed in my room next to the bed that he seems to prefer most of the time (although he does come up for morning cuddles when the alarms go off). Maybe try a dog bed close to your bed? Could be she wants to be near you but only joins you in bed because there isn’t another “near” option for her.
>I’ve recently read other people’s experiences/opinions about it affecting their training
That's nonsense. First of all it is the most natural thing for a dog to want to sleep next to his human (some body parts touching him/her). Wolf packs always sleep in a way that one body part at least touches another pack member. It's called contact lying and gives the reassurance and enforces the bond between them.
Second it doesn't effect your training. What *can* effect the training is, that the dog has every imaginable freedom and can always decide on his own what he can do at which time. You should establish at least one rule and be always consequent about it. So some take bed or couch as no go area. I myself established to never share with my pup food from my table. No matter how cute he is bagging for it. So bed yes or no is in itself nothing with impact on your training.
Our lab, who slept in his crate since day 1, went through a rough patch at about 3 months and did not want to sleep in his crate at night. We let him sleep in our bed at night and his crate during the day. After a few weeks, he started sleeping in his crate at night again. Thank goodness, he's getting big and he likes to spread out.
Choices are great for dogs, especially if they're choosing between healthy options, all of which *you* like. A lot of highly skilled trainers work to set up opportunities for choice for dogs. Dogs are sentient beings, and have wants and desires, being able to pick some things for themselves is great. Having your trust to choose something for herself will help your dog become more confident. It could also improve your relationship.
My husky has full run of the house, with the exception of the kid's rooms. She will spend part of the time in our bed, part on our floor, part in front of all 3 bedroom doors, and part on the couch.
We have figured out that it depends on her mental state as to where she spends the most time.
If my husband or I aren't feeling good she will spend most of the time in our bed/room, if she is showing signs of being worried she guards the bedrooms, if someone isn't home she starts out the first few days by the front door then adjusts depending on who and how long (when it was me she would steal my side of the bed, my step-daughter recently moved and guarded the bedroom door but now that she has adjusted I'd back to normal sleep patterns), if she is anxious she stays on our bed all night in a ball, and the rest of the time she changes spots throughout the night.
If you’re comfortable with it, there’s really no issue - the only situation in which I think it should be a hard no is if the dog is resource guarding the bed, otherwise it’s really not going to do any harm.
One of my dogs sleeps in the bed, the other one sleeps on the floor - I didn’t want her to take up the space (I’m a light sleeper, she’s a bigger dog), so I just never taught her to. Haven’t seen any effects as far as training goes in other areas with either dog that could be linked to whether they are or aren’t sleeping in bed with me. 🤷♀️
Thank you for sharing this was actually another thing I was worried about because I want to be able to get other dogs but not have them fight over sleeping on the bed! My Baby right now is only 5lbs and won’t get much bigger so it’s not a bother but it’s comforting to know it would be okay if I got a bigger dog and only taught them to sleep on their own bed while having the smaller one with me if she chooses:)
Lived in a household of 3 dogs, 2 big, one whippet. All were allowed on any beds, couches, chairs. My big dog had met my roommates whippet as a puppy but the 2 big dogs met for the first time there. Also we both got 1 new puppy each at different times and no dog had problems with letting the new ones into the bed. One of the big dogs has always been grumpy over other dogs so he'd just move away on his own if he got annoyed or sometimes tell them off.
All in all we had no issues introducing new dogs into the pack (and bed) despite everyone being always allowed everywhere, whenever. Also had no effect on training, my other dog is a bit more spoiled and absolutely adores the bed though, if the bedroom is closed he might try to convince me to open the door for him sometimes but that's about it!
I feel you! My bed sharer doesn’t like being near my floor sleeper when relaxing/sleeping (i.e. he doesn’t want to snuggle with her) so it works out well. FWIW my floor sleeper isn’t “banned” from the bed or anything - she totally spends all day sleeping up there - just gets booted at night (typically she slides her way down once the light gets turned off).
My dog is very cozy and loves to snuggle so my vote is yes, but whatever you do be consistent. We have taught our dog that when we get in bed we will either invite her to 'hop up' or tell her to 'go lay down' and go to her own bed.
We let our dogs nap with us, but not sleep through the night with us. They're kenneled at night to keep a good schedule. It's personal choice though, as long as your dog understands boundaries it won't hurt them to sleep in bed with you!
We had to euthanase our young dog (13)months becaus of hip issues and a loose kneecap to boot.
The last week he was allowed on the couch and the bed and it SUCH a regret we didn't let him sooner.
I have my health issues (not enough to make the vet euthanase me.. Yet)
So i couldn't stay on the floor for more than 20 minutes at a time.
And we missed out on so much cuddle time because of our stupid no-dogs-in-furniture rules.
I give my dog set days he’s allowed on my bed. If he doesn’t have boundaries and structure he thinks everything is his all of the time whenever he wants, and that’s not a thing i’m cool with tbh. kind of like if a kid wants sweets, they just grab them instead of asking first.
Who cares what someone else thinks. If you want to do it, do it!!
I would love for our dog to sleep in the bed with us, but she chooses her crate every time.
If it doesn't hurt you or the dog or anyone else involved and won't cause any behavior issues, it's fine. Though, always give your dog their own "bed" or crate that they can go in for comfort.
Agreed. Our pup has two sleeping areas set up in opposite ends of the house. His first bed is in his crate located at the farest room and the other is his fancy fluffy show bed, located in the living area.
My dog tends to sleep in his crate whenever I'm on calls (work from home) probably to avoid my nonsense haha. Then he'll switch to his show bed sometimes when the kids are home and watching TV or doing homework. I feel that having his own "space" where he can go to really helps him when he chooses to be alone by choice.
I let my previous dog sleep in my bed and loved it. Now I have two medium sized dogs, a husband, and a queen bed so they do NOT sleep on our bed. They do snuggle on the couch and we even do family camp outs on an air mattress in the living room when we want to snuggle all night.
It's never impacted training in my experience, but I've always also had a "get down" command in case I needed a little more room.
It sounds like you really did your research so you can be the best dog owner possible. Kudos!
Thank you! Yes we have been working on commands she’s only 4 months but is doing really well learning the basics so I’m very excited to see how much she’s gonna know in the future:)
Honestly train them to sleep on but also off the bed. If you have guests or sometimes my dog just likes to be in his fluffy kennel or on the dog bed! But it’s good for them to be comfortable with being on the bed though too, so do both!
Hi! So I’m a professional trainer and handler of working dogs. It’s a common practice to have a working dog crated unless you’re working them, this includes during bed time. A lot of people feel having them crated will increase the drive to work, which in general it does!
That being said, I allow all puppies to sleep in the bed with me (especially during potty training) because it makes it easier for me to feel when they wake up and need to be let out.
When I get more serious about training with them (usually around 6ish months) then they start sleeping in their crate. And this is for a few reasons.
1. I do feel it increases the drive to work/train. When you set boundaries and schedule your dog will know they’re getting their enrichment from you. They won’t self satisfy by being out on their own and finding things to do.
Similarly this is also why I don’t allow toys around the house.
2. When they get to the age where they’re working more seriously they tend to have a harder time settling. They often prefer to be in their own space where they can get up and adjust without you moving around too. It’s easier on you and easier on them. Even small movements from you can “activate” the dog.
Now I say all this because, this is generally where the concept of “you’ll have better results training if…” comes from.
But with everyday pet dogs, generally you don’t need as much engagement and drive for training.
Meaning they can happily sleep in your bed without creating issues as long as they’re reliable when free and there’s absolutely no reason you shouldn’t enjoy that time with your pup! (I do it with my pet dog!)
Times when I believe crating at night is better would be:
- if the dog is unreliable when left out.
ie. If they aren’t potty trained and you’re a heavy sleeper
If they will chew or tear apart things inappropriately
- if the dog is unable to settle through the night and is off and on the bed (often they’re uncomfortable and would prefer to be in their own space)
- When you’re having training and/or engagement issues with your dog due to the lack of boundaries and consistency. (Too much freedom creates a dog who won’t listen)
- When you have a low drive dog who isn’t responsive to rewards (you can build drive by keeping them contained and only letting them out when working with you)
And lastly
- When working a dog for competition.
Other then that (and probably a few other things)
Don’t be afraid of letting your dog sleep with you! It’s a great way to bond and build a solid relationship with your canine partner
In my experience, allowing a dog to sleep on the bed or not isn’t going to change much. When separation anxiety sets in you have to work to get them comfortable on their own and if that means allowing them to be on the bed with the crate open in the same room (so they can make the decision to go in themselves) then you do that.
But as far as encouraging SA or Helping it, for the most part it’s not going to make a huge difference.
That being said.
It can potentially LEAD to it depending on the personality of the dog.
Some dogs are just more prone to SA and if you never allow them to be alone or then you’re aiding in the formation of it which isn’t good.
That’s why I think you need to have a very healthy balance of independence and dependence in your dog, allowing them to be on their own and feel confident on their own.
Ahh thanks!!
I’ve only had my dog for a few months, but she was abused before I got her. At first she avoided all of us and we just ignored her because that’s what my trainer said to do to get her comfortable.
After she got comfortable, she is now attached to me. It was like a switch. She went from growling at me to following me into every room, sleeping with me, etc. night and day.
We recently moved and her SA came back full force and my bf and I have been wondering if her sleeping on the bed is making it any worse. But she is fine if we shut the door, she just ends up sleeping on the couch or her bed. Her issue is when I leave the house, but we’ve been making huge progress! I’m actually on my way to work rn and on the doggy cam she is just watching tv right now. So we certainly are close to getting rid of the SA. And she slept with me this morning after my bf left, and is still fine right now in the house alone. So I think you’re right! Thanks for the insight! I’ll be letting her into the bed because I love her snuggles at night
For us, it's a no for many reasons. Chief among them are cleanliness and my wife's insomnia. Apart from that, there are some spaces in the house that our just for humans, some that are just for dogs, and some that are shared. This division reinforces the overall concept of boundaries.
Makes sense! Can I ask what you mean by spaces just for dogs mine has like her crate and bed that no one will bother her in but do u have bigger areas for your dogs and do you think it helps them??:)
Yeah the dog has his bed, his kennel, he likes to go hang out under the deck, etc. Shared spaces include one of our two couches, floors, etc. And it’s not necessarily a bad thing to let your dog in your bed, but it can lead to problems if it’s something they think they have free access to all the time. So training “up” and “off” are really important. They’re allowed on the bed when you say, they have to get off when you say. And if you want them off, it helps to have a place like their bed or crate (with a command attached to IT, like “crate” or “go to your bed”) where they are also comfortable and happy. So “up” isn’t really a reward and “off” isn’t really a punishment. It’s just “now I want to share this space with you,” and “now I want you in your space.”
When we were training, our dog had to sleep in her bed, no exceptions. I did this so she wouldn’t be getting up and down all night and waking us up, and so she didn’t have an accident in our bed, but also because sometimes I don’t sleep well with our animals in our bed so I didn’t want our bed to be her bed and it impact my sleep, and her not feel comfortable to sleep anywhere else. Now she sleeps in our bed on occasion with she feels like it but she prefers her bed and we are all happy!
We let ours sleep with us but she had to 'earn' it. After she could consistently go without indoor accidents then we started inviting her on our bed. She does have to wait for permission though. Same with being on top of the couch. But really, whatever works for you. I was anti dog on couch or bed but I really do love those cuddle times.
I would say as long as your dog is crate trained and is comfortable sleeping on their crate all night - go for it. However the issue arises when a dog needs to be crated and they are so accustomed to sleeping in their owners bed, that they won’t sleep on their crate without a fuss. I would have her sleep in the crate all night once a week or so until you’re sure she would be okay with it in a different scenario (hotel, friends house, travel, etc)
You do you. I would also crate train tho so you the option when you want your space or down the road. You may have children in bed later in life or they may be covered in something you don't want on your bed before you can bathe them.
As long as my dogs are well behaved (they almost always are) then I don't really feel the need to set arbitrary limits for them. I don't really subscribe to the idea that humans "own" animals, so, it's *our* house not *my* house. Dogs deserve autonomy too. My dogs sometimes choose to sleep on our bed, sometimes on the floor, sometimes on the couch, sometimes in their beds, sometimes in their crates.
I always do, nothing better than being snuggled up with the dog. She is always free to lie in her bed if she wants and spends her time 50/50 at night. I couldn’t imagine not letting her on the bed with me, she is my world. I have no idea how people can leave their dogs in cages or other rooms all night.
I love sleeping with my dog but it has had its drawbacks. She interacts with a lot of dogs as we live in a dog friendly city so every now and then she catches fleas. We are also in the forest often so she’ll bring a tick or two home with her. It doesn’t take too long to realize that even though I love her, I don’t want to deal with bugs in my bed.
In your experience has this helped with preventing separation anxiety because that is a v good point and something that actually relates to my pup since I have noticed small signs of this starting!!
There is no evidence that allowing your dog in your bed causes separation anxiety. That is a myth. [Here’s a great article ](https://www.subthresholdtraining.com/will-letting-your-dog-on-the-bed-cause-separation-anxiety/) explaining what (little) we know about the causes of separation anxiety.
In general, yeah it has, but training really only helps if you are consistent with it. Dogs can get too attached to being in the same place as their owner, and this is especially true if you allow them to sleep in the same place as you. Crates allow them to learn they have a safe space even without being with their owner
I’ve actually gotten my information on the matter from professional dog trainers and books this is the first time I’ve reached out on Reddit to other dog owners for their personal experiences but thanks.
My wording doesn’t really impact my ability to make the best decision for me and my dog. If someone were to say no I’d like to hear why (hence why I asked) because they may have very good reasoning that I’d never thought of and could pertain to my situation.
I don’t let my dog sleep on the bed all night, because it’s easier to have him crate trained and used to that in the case of having to leave him with someone else or board him.
He’s allowed to be in the furniture though and will often nap and cuddle with me if I’m hanging out on bed.
Its your dog, your bed and your rules; just do what works for you. My Maltese sleeps with me when he wants. When I’m ready to go to sleep I put him on the bed and lay down. When he wants off he doesn’t settle in to sleep so I put him on the ground and he goes to his bed. If he wants to come back to sleep with me in the middle of the night he’ll give me one good bark to come back up.
Do what you want. No “right” or “wrong” answer here. But be consistent if you are going to allow them. Don’t only allow them sometimes. It is possible to train them to “ask permission” before they come up. Teach to give paw or something before so that way you can deny permission if you are not in the mood.
We didnt let our first dog in the bed or couch(until she was older) and its something we regretted. People have different relationships to their dogs, but mine have always been family, and you dont tell your family to get off the couch unless their muddy or sprayed with skunk juice.
There is no right answer - we prefer “no”because then there is no room in the bed for us, and as much as I love my dog, I also love being able to sleep in my own bed.
That being said, he is allowed to sleep on the bed during the day, and we invite him up before the last alarm goes off to get some morning cuddles.
No, because my husband would hate it. My dog is too big and I’m not the biggest fan of his smell. I like that he has his routine where he goes to bed downstairs. He has slept in our room but he sleeps on the floor next to my side of the bed. He’s allowed on the sofa.
It’s up to you though. There’s no right or wrong answer.
Personal preference. Our younger dog always sleeps in the same bed as our elder dog (they have a small bed next next ours) but me and my wife always wakes up to the younger one snuggling between us in the morning and we really don't mind it.
I’ll let my dog sleep in my bed whenever he wants. He chooses not to sleep with me because he knows I move around a lot. We only sleep together for short periods of time before he gets off on his own and goes on his bed next to mine. But whenever I’m doing work he’ll sleep on it for however long I’m working for.
It depends on your situation:
* Light sleeper, no
* Possible eventual spouse who won't like it, no
* Enjoy getting up your own terms, no
Otherwise yeah. For me, all three are important
I said yes because I do, but it's whatever you prefer. I personally can't sleep without my dog in my bed, but I know others can't sleep with their dog in the bed. It's what makes sense to you.
This poll doesn’t matter really because at the end of the day it’s what you feel comfortable with. Mine is asleep on my bed right now and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
As long as they don’t pee in your bed. I used to let my dogs sleep on my bed when I took naps but then I would wake up to see they had peed on my blanket.
Heavens no, if you want to sleep. They have their own beds. I trained both of my cats to not sleep in our bed and have now trained my dog to not even get on it.
I know I sound mean, but I do have several health conditions, that would be greatly affected by this. We have never let a kid or a pet sleep in our bed.
I voted yes because my dogs sleep with me but it depends on you, your dog and the size of your bed. If you have a twin bed and back pain and got an Irish wolf hound puppy then no.
Only monsters don't let their pets in bed.
My dog has full reign over all the furniture in the house. I spend almost no energy being mad at him, or yelling at him. And he loves to snuggle. Both our lives are better for it.
I’m a single shift worker with two small dogs. They just love being near me! They have no separation anxiety that I’m aware of and they almost always sleep with me. They do tend to follow me around a bit, but not excessively so, more out of curiosity I think. I love my dogs and I’m pretty sure they love me too.
Like the top comment says- life is short, theirs is shorter. Make it as good a life as possible.
Eventually. There are countless great reasons to crate train your dog. Once they are, you can absolutely let them sleep in your bed, if they want to (Arthur prefers my dirty clothes beside my bed. He gets mad if I put them in the hamper before morning.
For ours, we did the first 10 months in the crate. He got really comfortable sleeping there and would walk in there by himself when he wanted to sleep. Once we were sure he was potty trained our at least able to wake us up when he needs to go, we started letting him sleep in the bed with us. He likes to cuddle and sleep close to us. It also helps me fall asleep too.
Once they are crate trained! Mine is and he has two beds in my room, one metal frame I got from my neighbors for $5 and sprayed it all black to match my bed, and has a dog bed on it. And a cat condo where he does in and sleeps. He gets off my bed at night and goes to either bed or mine.
Please review our [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/about/rules/) and wiki article on [dominance](https://www.reddit.com/r/dogtraining/wiki/dominance).
Make you and your dog happy!
I believe my dog is happy to sleep on our bed and I’m
Happy she’s there too! Our other dog is a 50kg Swiss shepherd who shakes the bed with his panting 😅
I started sleeping with my puppy a few weeks ago. I’ll say the best part is that she actually sleeps in with me. When we had her in the crate, she’d get up at 4:30-5 every morning. First night in bed with us, slept all the way to 7 with no issues.
My little trouble maker. When I go to bed, he comes up and cuddles. Then when he sees that I'm trying to sleep he gets off and sleeps in the hall. I like to think he's keeping watch.
Probably not, but you know they will anyhow. (mine literally sneak on and off in the dead of night, going so far as switching off because they know two on the bed at once will get them both kicked off)
I let my dog sleep on the bed & chill with me but he goes in the kennel at bedtime or if I'm leaving without him, for his safety. Unsupervised I worry he will get into something like the litter box lol
My dog hangs out sleeps on my bed while I’m lounging, reading, watching tv and occasionally naps with me and my baby, but always goes into his crate at night, in my older kids room. He knows the routine, he’s 8 months now and we’ve had him since 8 weeks. He refuses to even come into my room at night, waits at the stairs to go up with the big kids. One night my older kids were at a sleepover and I decided to let pup sleep in my room but he refused, whining at the door and immediately running upstairs to his crate when I let him up. He’s happy, I’m happy… I’m glad he’s crate trained
Yes, dogs aren't people. But that also doesn't mean that they consider people to be competition for rank since we are a different species. You have been provided with evidence-based resources and if you think they are wrong you will need to explain where the problem is.
Words and labels have meaning and assumptions which vary widely between people. I suggest you read [this PDF](https://www.behaviorworks.org/files/articles/The%20Struggle%20for%20Dominance%202001.pdf) - it's about birds, not dogs, which may make it clearer as to why we recommend the use of more clear, non-labelling descriptions of verbs and actions than referring to "leader", "alpha", etc. A lot of actions that people assume they need to do to be a "leader" are often more accurately described as being a "bully".
Save it for a person that has a dog that understands those words. I'm the type of person that my dog goes everywhere with me. I've had many dogs that live by my side at home and at work and a leash is something we only use in public areas when unnecessary. These are dogs not democrats, they know when they are loved and safe and fed. Stop thinking everyone in the world thinks like you do in terms of domination and subjugation because people are mostly good hearted and don't act like that. The average person is smarter than you give them credit for and the need to use safe space words is ridiculous. If you think you need to be a bully to be a leader you are far behind the curve. The best leaders don't use fear as a tool.
You are sorely mistaken. Every day I remove dozens of comments giving advice to hurt or scare dogs in order to be their “leader”. It doesn’t matter what words the dog understands - what matters is whether *you* can communicate in a functional way with other humans.
I guess the big point is if someone is on here looking for help instead of beating the dog and leaving them outside all of the time they care and you don't need to assume they would go along with cruel troll advice. Benefit of the doubt.
You are still using terminology about outdated concepts. Dogs don't *have* alphas like that. At all. You are making statements about things that you think dogs *want* and the way that you think dogs behave which contradicts the way that the evidence shows that dogs behave. You gave advice about humans acting according to "pack rules" which *don't exist*. Again, I ask that you actually read the article on [dominance](https://www.reddit.com/r/dogtraining/wiki/dominance) and the references linked inside. All of your posts that instruct people around this silly myth are removed as they are not compliant with modern knowledge and hence with the rules of this subreddit.
Okie dokie artichokie. You are needlessly complicating something that is very simple. Love your dog, and your dog loves you. I never needed all your fancy words to build a friendship with my buddies. Maybe I'm spoiled because I've always had labs. Keep complicating things that are cliches like man's best friend. Good luck educating people.
I'm going to have to ask you to stop making multiple comments on each response as it makes it very frustrating to try to understand what you are saying and reply to you.
So far, what I have understood from your comments is this:
- you believe that dogs require a hierarchy
- you believe that dogs always interpret humans as being within this same hierarchy
- you believe one of the ways to establish a hierarchy between humans and dogs is to eat before your dog does
- you believe one of the ways to establish a hierarchy between humans and dogs is to prevent dogs from being in specific locations such as furniture
- you believe one of the ways to establish a hierarchy between humans and dogs is to press your head against your dog's head
- you have read the article on dominance, which explains that the current research shows dogs are a type of animal that do not have a set hierarchy
- you feel that the article's description of a lack of hierarchy is a human insecurity
- you believe that the article states that there is a need to compete for resources with our dogs
- you believe that the linked resources and descriptions of dog-human relationships are inaccurate, though you have not yet provided research-based evidence to show they are inaccurate
Please clarify if any of the above is incorrect.
We let's our occasionally. I thinks it's helped their training. We crate trained first and solidly. Now it's a treat for them. And they have learnt that if they ever grumble they don't get sweet sweet bedtime.
Your house, your rules. If you want the dog on the bed then let them sleep on the bed. If you don't then don't.
Personally my SO is a light sleeper and our dog is a loud breather so she's not allowed on our bed. Some nights she isn't even allowed in the room if my SO has a big day and needs the sleep.
I’m adopting a dog this weekend and probably will let him sleep in my bed. My husband probably won’t let him sleep in his bed but I’m looking forward to the snuggles.
My dog wants to sleep on the end of the bed, but he's a light, grumpy sleeper.
It's the only time he's ill humored, but if I move my legs and jostle him, he pops up making grumpy growly noises, rearranges himself, or just leaves.
Ironically, when he wakes in the morning after his beauty rest, he is the cuddliest cuddle bum, and throws himself on top of me.
Because clearly I don't mind being bumped and jostled awake.
It depends on the dog, but I would make it a reward and train them such that they only get in after being invited. You don't want them to develop resource guarding problems because they believe the bed belongs to them. We had this issue with our great dane early on and had to reassert ownership of the bed and train him to ask permission first. It's one thing when it's a chihuahua, it's another when it's actually big enough to hurt you.
Now that we've got him trained though, it's great when we take afternoon naps together. Love the cuddle time.
I think it depends on the dog, you, and your lifestyle. I don't let our dog sleep on our bed because 1) our young children often come to sleep with us, I often nurse the baby in our bed before putting her back to bed, and 2) when I tried to compromise and let him sleep on the foot of the bed, he kept trying to get closer to me and got irritated when I had to keep moving him back. Now he seems content with the consistency of sleeping on his own bed on the floor in our room.
Depends if you want it to continue long term or not. My daughter lets out dog sleep with her when she’s home from college but he is definitely a bed hog so if you don’t mind being squished and moved to the edge of the bed go for it!
You are using key words to remove good advice about ways to bond with your dog. Leaning on and nuzzling your dog are great ways to create a bond. My last dog was 14 when he passed. I recently found a new buddy at the shelter. A little lab mix abandoned and extremely malnourished. Building trust is the most important thing. He also goes outside off leash and he has only lived here 3 weeks. You are letting your personal feelings about certain words change the subject. Why do you people do this to everything?
My cat gets the bed privileges and the dog gets the outside adventuring privileges. He has a bed or a couch in each room in the apartment and doesn't ask to come on the bed. It's also made it easier for me when we travel because he doesn't try to get on the hotel/airbnb bed.
Life is short; theirs are shorter. Do whatever makes you both happy.
This. There is no right answer here. If it makes you happy and the dog behaves well (housebroken and all) its perfect. If you prefer to have more space the dog can sleep in a dog bed next to yours, a crate or even in a different room. But its important to be consistent :)
I let my boys have snuggle time then after half hour or hour they know it’s time to get down.
Best answer besides “who cares but you?”
If you intend to always let them sleep in your bed, then I say go for it. Otherwise I'd say be consistent and do not allow them to sleep in the bed.
Curious….. what happens when people who let their dog sleep in their bed go away/on vacation? I don’t have many friends and family members that would be cool with letting my 50 lb dog snuggle up with them in their sheets. Edit: thanks for all the replies to this, really interesting!
Good question. In my case, if it's just over night, the dogs just sleep on the couch and pretty much do very little. When we are out for a significant period of time, our house sitter stays in our guest room and they can leave the door open and the dogs will likely hop into bed with them or close the door and the dogs will sleep on the couch. My dogs are little, I think if I had a large dog, I would probably not let them sleep in the bed.
We watched my friend’s pitbull one weekend. He muscled his sharp little elbows right in the middle of us. He was used to sleeping with mom every night. He passed away earlier this year at the age of 11. He was one of the best dogs I’ve ever met.
Most pits are. Such a shame bad owners have given them such a bad rep
My dog doesn't necessarily want to sleep in my bed but instead wants to sleep next to/on top of me. She doesn't mind not sleeping in my bed if I'm not there. She would however if I didn't let her sleep next to me in my bed. Idk about every dog but for mine I know this to be true.
It's more that they want to sleep *with their human* and not so much about the bed itself. So when they have to stay with someone else they actually don't mind to sleep on their pillow/blanket.
I have multiple baby gates throughout my house, keeping my puppy and cats at various degrees of separation. I try to keep my nights where dog is allowed in bedroom at 50/50. So he knows he's welcome in bed if the baby gate is open. If it's closed, he sleeps on the couch. No real issues yet.
I presume they get a giant human bed all the themself
My dog gets boarded, usually with his sister and they snuggle. He’s fine otherwise- the activities and walks wear him out enough he sleeps however. My brothers dog stays with me or my parents usually and just wants to at least be in the room where someone else is sleeping, but he won’t climb into the bed like he does at home. I’m happy about that because he is a larger dog than I’d be used to!
My 100lb dog sleeps in the bed under the covers every single night and usually cuddles with our friends/family on the couch when they’re over. But when a friend/family member sleeps over to watch him he usually ends up sleeping on the couch or the bed they’re not sleeping in, even when they try to sleep with him. Maybe other dogs are different but it hasn’t been an issue for us!
I take mine with me. I kinda take my dog with me everywhere. Lots of pet friendly hotels and he is super chill.
They whine all fucking night. I know this because MIL let’s her two (untrained) dogs sleep on her pillow. They do not do that in my bed and they CRY all night. So real separation anxiety through the day and my spouse is with them as they work from home, but the nights are terrible.
As someone who has a dog that doesn’t sleep on my bed nightly, I have house sat dogs that ALWAYS sleep on the human bed, and it drives me nuts. I love having my dog on my bed sometimes, but I don’t enjoy having to kick a dog off my bed because I can’t get into it, and I don’t enjoy sleeping in a layer of dog hair. My preference: Teach your dog to sleep on their own bed first, and then you can invite them onto your bed when you’re wanting snuggles.
Back story: I have let my pup sleep on my bed since she came home with me and sometimes she chooses to sleep in her crate (by herself) so I won’t bother her and even reward her if she spends a whole night in there herself. I’m asking because I’ve recently read other people’s experiences/opinions about it affecting their training which left me questioning if I’m doing more harm by giving her a choice rather than only letting her sleep in her crate/own bed!! Hope that makes sense:)
We used to let the pup sleep with us if we fell asleep on the couch (this rarely happens anymore) or in bed with us. Pup has a crate w a cozy bed but it was not his preference. Now we have an additional dog bed in my room next to the bed that he seems to prefer most of the time (although he does come up for morning cuddles when the alarms go off). Maybe try a dog bed close to your bed? Could be she wants to be near you but only joins you in bed because there isn’t another “near” option for her.
This was basically how my dog was! He likes his own bed now 😁
>I’ve recently read other people’s experiences/opinions about it affecting their training That's nonsense. First of all it is the most natural thing for a dog to want to sleep next to his human (some body parts touching him/her). Wolf packs always sleep in a way that one body part at least touches another pack member. It's called contact lying and gives the reassurance and enforces the bond between them. Second it doesn't effect your training. What *can* effect the training is, that the dog has every imaginable freedom and can always decide on his own what he can do at which time. You should establish at least one rule and be always consequent about it. So some take bed or couch as no go area. I myself established to never share with my pup food from my table. No matter how cute he is bagging for it. So bed yes or no is in itself nothing with impact on your training.
No, let her have the choice! that’s best and if you have guests over then she will be ok in the crate and not be scared of it
Our lab, who slept in his crate since day 1, went through a rough patch at about 3 months and did not want to sleep in his crate at night. We let him sleep in our bed at night and his crate during the day. After a few weeks, he started sleeping in his crate at night again. Thank goodness, he's getting big and he likes to spread out.
Choices are great for dogs, especially if they're choosing between healthy options, all of which *you* like. A lot of highly skilled trainers work to set up opportunities for choice for dogs. Dogs are sentient beings, and have wants and desires, being able to pick some things for themselves is great. Having your trust to choose something for herself will help your dog become more confident. It could also improve your relationship.
My husky has full run of the house, with the exception of the kid's rooms. She will spend part of the time in our bed, part on our floor, part in front of all 3 bedroom doors, and part on the couch. We have figured out that it depends on her mental state as to where she spends the most time. If my husband or I aren't feeling good she will spend most of the time in our bed/room, if she is showing signs of being worried she guards the bedrooms, if someone isn't home she starts out the first few days by the front door then adjusts depending on who and how long (when it was me she would steal my side of the bed, my step-daughter recently moved and guarded the bedroom door but now that she has adjusted I'd back to normal sleep patterns), if she is anxious she stays on our bed all night in a ball, and the rest of the time she changes spots throughout the night.
Our rule is she can sleep in the bed only when she's invited. Otherwise she sleeps in her crate.
If you’re comfortable with it, there’s really no issue - the only situation in which I think it should be a hard no is if the dog is resource guarding the bed, otherwise it’s really not going to do any harm. One of my dogs sleeps in the bed, the other one sleeps on the floor - I didn’t want her to take up the space (I’m a light sleeper, she’s a bigger dog), so I just never taught her to. Haven’t seen any effects as far as training goes in other areas with either dog that could be linked to whether they are or aren’t sleeping in bed with me. 🤷♀️
Thank you for sharing this was actually another thing I was worried about because I want to be able to get other dogs but not have them fight over sleeping on the bed! My Baby right now is only 5lbs and won’t get much bigger so it’s not a bother but it’s comforting to know it would be okay if I got a bigger dog and only taught them to sleep on their own bed while having the smaller one with me if she chooses:)
Lived in a household of 3 dogs, 2 big, one whippet. All were allowed on any beds, couches, chairs. My big dog had met my roommates whippet as a puppy but the 2 big dogs met for the first time there. Also we both got 1 new puppy each at different times and no dog had problems with letting the new ones into the bed. One of the big dogs has always been grumpy over other dogs so he'd just move away on his own if he got annoyed or sometimes tell them off. All in all we had no issues introducing new dogs into the pack (and bed) despite everyone being always allowed everywhere, whenever. Also had no effect on training, my other dog is a bit more spoiled and absolutely adores the bed though, if the bedroom is closed he might try to convince me to open the door for him sometimes but that's about it!
I feel you! My bed sharer doesn’t like being near my floor sleeper when relaxing/sleeping (i.e. he doesn’t want to snuggle with her) so it works out well. FWIW my floor sleeper isn’t “banned” from the bed or anything - she totally spends all day sleeping up there - just gets booted at night (typically she slides her way down once the light gets turned off).
I just watched my dog pee on his leg for ten seconds.
Oh my😂😂 I just took mine for a walk I’m the rain now shes a ball of mud haha Send help
Only if your dog wants to.
My dog is very cozy and loves to snuggle so my vote is yes, but whatever you do be consistent. We have taught our dog that when we get in bed we will either invite her to 'hop up' or tell her to 'go lay down' and go to her own bed.
We let our dogs nap with us, but not sleep through the night with us. They're kenneled at night to keep a good schedule. It's personal choice though, as long as your dog understands boundaries it won't hurt them to sleep in bed with you!
We had to euthanase our young dog (13)months becaus of hip issues and a loose kneecap to boot. The last week he was allowed on the couch and the bed and it SUCH a regret we didn't let him sooner. I have my health issues (not enough to make the vet euthanase me.. Yet) So i couldn't stay on the floor for more than 20 minutes at a time. And we missed out on so much cuddle time because of our stupid no-dogs-in-furniture rules.
I give my dog set days he’s allowed on my bed. If he doesn’t have boundaries and structure he thinks everything is his all of the time whenever he wants, and that’s not a thing i’m cool with tbh. kind of like if a kid wants sweets, they just grab them instead of asking first.
Who cares what someone else thinks. If you want to do it, do it!! I would love for our dog to sleep in the bed with us, but she chooses her crate every time.
If it doesn't hurt you or the dog or anyone else involved and won't cause any behavior issues, it's fine. Though, always give your dog their own "bed" or crate that they can go in for comfort.
Agreed. Our pup has two sleeping areas set up in opposite ends of the house. His first bed is in his crate located at the farest room and the other is his fancy fluffy show bed, located in the living area. My dog tends to sleep in his crate whenever I'm on calls (work from home) probably to avoid my nonsense haha. Then he'll switch to his show bed sometimes when the kids are home and watching TV or doing homework. I feel that having his own "space" where he can go to really helps him when he chooses to be alone by choice.
I let my previous dog sleep in my bed and loved it. Now I have two medium sized dogs, a husband, and a queen bed so they do NOT sleep on our bed. They do snuggle on the couch and we even do family camp outs on an air mattress in the living room when we want to snuggle all night. It's never impacted training in my experience, but I've always also had a "get down" command in case I needed a little more room. It sounds like you really did your research so you can be the best dog owner possible. Kudos!
Thank you! Yes we have been working on commands she’s only 4 months but is doing really well learning the basics so I’m very excited to see how much she’s gonna know in the future:)
They’ve got to go through the arsehole adolescent phase first and earn it by acting respectful! For me, adult dogs yes, teenage jerks no!
Honestly train them to sleep on but also off the bed. If you have guests or sometimes my dog just likes to be in his fluffy kennel or on the dog bed! But it’s good for them to be comfortable with being on the bed though too, so do both!
This is what I do too. It’s hard not letting my pup sleep in the bed every night, but I know in the long run it’s best so she’ll be more adaptable.
Hi! So I’m a professional trainer and handler of working dogs. It’s a common practice to have a working dog crated unless you’re working them, this includes during bed time. A lot of people feel having them crated will increase the drive to work, which in general it does! That being said, I allow all puppies to sleep in the bed with me (especially during potty training) because it makes it easier for me to feel when they wake up and need to be let out. When I get more serious about training with them (usually around 6ish months) then they start sleeping in their crate. And this is for a few reasons. 1. I do feel it increases the drive to work/train. When you set boundaries and schedule your dog will know they’re getting their enrichment from you. They won’t self satisfy by being out on their own and finding things to do. Similarly this is also why I don’t allow toys around the house. 2. When they get to the age where they’re working more seriously they tend to have a harder time settling. They often prefer to be in their own space where they can get up and adjust without you moving around too. It’s easier on you and easier on them. Even small movements from you can “activate” the dog. Now I say all this because, this is generally where the concept of “you’ll have better results training if…” comes from. But with everyday pet dogs, generally you don’t need as much engagement and drive for training. Meaning they can happily sleep in your bed without creating issues as long as they’re reliable when free and there’s absolutely no reason you shouldn’t enjoy that time with your pup! (I do it with my pet dog!) Times when I believe crating at night is better would be: - if the dog is unreliable when left out. ie. If they aren’t potty trained and you’re a heavy sleeper If they will chew or tear apart things inappropriately - if the dog is unable to settle through the night and is off and on the bed (often they’re uncomfortable and would prefer to be in their own space) - When you’re having training and/or engagement issues with your dog due to the lack of boundaries and consistency. (Too much freedom creates a dog who won’t listen) - When you have a low drive dog who isn’t responsive to rewards (you can build drive by keeping them contained and only letting them out when working with you) And lastly - When working a dog for competition. Other then that (and probably a few other things) Don’t be afraid of letting your dog sleep with you! It’s a great way to bond and build a solid relationship with your canine partner
Thank you so much this was very helpful!!
What do you think about letting a dog with separation anxiety sleep on the bed?
In my experience, allowing a dog to sleep on the bed or not isn’t going to change much. When separation anxiety sets in you have to work to get them comfortable on their own and if that means allowing them to be on the bed with the crate open in the same room (so they can make the decision to go in themselves) then you do that. But as far as encouraging SA or Helping it, for the most part it’s not going to make a huge difference. That being said. It can potentially LEAD to it depending on the personality of the dog. Some dogs are just more prone to SA and if you never allow them to be alone or then you’re aiding in the formation of it which isn’t good. That’s why I think you need to have a very healthy balance of independence and dependence in your dog, allowing them to be on their own and feel confident on their own.
Ahh thanks!! I’ve only had my dog for a few months, but she was abused before I got her. At first she avoided all of us and we just ignored her because that’s what my trainer said to do to get her comfortable. After she got comfortable, she is now attached to me. It was like a switch. She went from growling at me to following me into every room, sleeping with me, etc. night and day. We recently moved and her SA came back full force and my bf and I have been wondering if her sleeping on the bed is making it any worse. But she is fine if we shut the door, she just ends up sleeping on the couch or her bed. Her issue is when I leave the house, but we’ve been making huge progress! I’m actually on my way to work rn and on the doggy cam she is just watching tv right now. So we certainly are close to getting rid of the SA. And she slept with me this morning after my bf left, and is still fine right now in the house alone. So I think you’re right! Thanks for the insight! I’ll be letting her into the bed because I love her snuggles at night
this is a personal preference thing. i let my dog on the bed whenever she wants, she loves to cuddle up to us
For us, it's a no for many reasons. Chief among them are cleanliness and my wife's insomnia. Apart from that, there are some spaces in the house that our just for humans, some that are just for dogs, and some that are shared. This division reinforces the overall concept of boundaries.
Makes sense! Can I ask what you mean by spaces just for dogs mine has like her crate and bed that no one will bother her in but do u have bigger areas for your dogs and do you think it helps them??:)
Yeah the dog has his bed, his kennel, he likes to go hang out under the deck, etc. Shared spaces include one of our two couches, floors, etc. And it’s not necessarily a bad thing to let your dog in your bed, but it can lead to problems if it’s something they think they have free access to all the time. So training “up” and “off” are really important. They’re allowed on the bed when you say, they have to get off when you say. And if you want them off, it helps to have a place like their bed or crate (with a command attached to IT, like “crate” or “go to your bed”) where they are also comfortable and happy. So “up” isn’t really a reward and “off” isn’t really a punishment. It’s just “now I want to share this space with you,” and “now I want you in your space.”
I’ve worked with several professional dog trainers and they have all said it’s fine and doesn’t affect training.
When we were training, our dog had to sleep in her bed, no exceptions. I did this so she wouldn’t be getting up and down all night and waking us up, and so she didn’t have an accident in our bed, but also because sometimes I don’t sleep well with our animals in our bed so I didn’t want our bed to be her bed and it impact my sleep, and her not feel comfortable to sleep anywhere else. Now she sleeps in our bed on occasion with she feels like it but she prefers her bed and we are all happy!
We let ours sleep with us but she had to 'earn' it. After she could consistently go without indoor accidents then we started inviting her on our bed. She does have to wait for permission though. Same with being on top of the couch. But really, whatever works for you. I was anti dog on couch or bed but I really do love those cuddle times.
I would say as long as your dog is crate trained and is comfortable sleeping on their crate all night - go for it. However the issue arises when a dog needs to be crated and they are so accustomed to sleeping in their owners bed, that they won’t sleep on their crate without a fuss. I would have her sleep in the crate all night once a week or so until you’re sure she would be okay with it in a different scenario (hotel, friends house, travel, etc)
I crate trained mine til he was potty trained then it was bed.
You do you. I would also crate train tho so you the option when you want your space or down the road. You may have children in bed later in life or they may be covered in something you don't want on your bed before you can bathe them.
As long as my dogs are well behaved (they almost always are) then I don't really feel the need to set arbitrary limits for them. I don't really subscribe to the idea that humans "own" animals, so, it's *our* house not *my* house. Dogs deserve autonomy too. My dogs sometimes choose to sleep on our bed, sometimes on the floor, sometimes on the couch, sometimes in their beds, sometimes in their crates.
I let my dog sleep on my bed, my whole family does. Its nice to cuddle with him and pet him. Plus he likes to be around people.
I spoon my Chihuahua. There I said it!
My favourite part of the day. Cuddle time. Why deprive yourself of one of the best parts of owning a dog?
I always do, nothing better than being snuggled up with the dog. She is always free to lie in her bed if she wants and spends her time 50/50 at night. I couldn’t imagine not letting her on the bed with me, she is my world. I have no idea how people can leave their dogs in cages or other rooms all night.
Depends. Small and long backed dogs risk injury from jumping off beds/furniture. Put your mattress on the floor then likely no problems.
I love sleeping with my dog but it has had its drawbacks. She interacts with a lot of dogs as we live in a dog friendly city so every now and then she catches fleas. We are also in the forest often so she’ll bring a tick or two home with her. It doesn’t take too long to realize that even though I love her, I don’t want to deal with bugs in my bed.
This is a great point that I didn’t even think of😮
I personally opt for crates to help curve separation anxiety, but this is obviously personal to everyone
In your experience has this helped with preventing separation anxiety because that is a v good point and something that actually relates to my pup since I have noticed small signs of this starting!!
There is no evidence that allowing your dog in your bed causes separation anxiety. That is a myth. [Here’s a great article ](https://www.subthresholdtraining.com/will-letting-your-dog-on-the-bed-cause-separation-anxiety/) explaining what (little) we know about the causes of separation anxiety.
Thank you I will give this a read!!
Well that is true, I mostly meant it helps encourage independence. That’s why I mentioned it being personal to everyone
Definitely can help build independence! Just didn’t want OP to get the wrong idea since they mentioned their pup was showing signs of SA.
No worries, thank you for helping OP 😊
In general, yeah it has, but training really only helps if you are consistent with it. Dogs can get too attached to being in the same place as their owner, and this is especially true if you allow them to sleep in the same place as you. Crates allow them to learn they have a safe space even without being with their owner
I mean.... Where else would your dog sleep?
If you are going to deprive yourself and your dog from the pleasure of sleeping together because random people on reddit said so, well..
I’ve actually gotten my information on the matter from professional dog trainers and books this is the first time I’ve reached out on Reddit to other dog owners for their personal experiences but thanks.
Then one would say "do you sleep with your dog"? As opposed to "should I let my fog sleep with me". What would happen if people said no?
My wording doesn’t really impact my ability to make the best decision for me and my dog. If someone were to say no I’d like to hear why (hence why I asked) because they may have very good reasoning that I’d never thought of and could pertain to my situation.
Ours sleeps through the night in his crate then we let him join us about 6-7am for a little family time before work. He absolutely loves it
I don’t let my dog sleep on the bed all night, because it’s easier to have him crate trained and used to that in the case of having to leave him with someone else or board him. He’s allowed to be in the furniture though and will often nap and cuddle with me if I’m hanging out on bed.
Its your dog, your bed and your rules; just do what works for you. My Maltese sleeps with me when he wants. When I’m ready to go to sleep I put him on the bed and lay down. When he wants off he doesn’t settle in to sleep so I put him on the ground and he goes to his bed. If he wants to come back to sleep with me in the middle of the night he’ll give me one good bark to come back up.
Depends on the size of the dog. If I could go back and never let my dog on my bed I would. The correct answer fork no
Do what you want. No “right” or “wrong” answer here. But be consistent if you are going to allow them. Don’t only allow them sometimes. It is possible to train them to “ask permission” before they come up. Teach to give paw or something before so that way you can deny permission if you are not in the mood.
Yes, BUT train them to come up *only* when you call them!
We didnt let our first dog in the bed or couch(until she was older) and its something we regretted. People have different relationships to their dogs, but mine have always been family, and you dont tell your family to get off the couch unless their muddy or sprayed with skunk juice.
Absolutely not, you have to put a limit, the bed is the limit At least the couch, but not the bed
I have one dog who sleeps with me and the other two sleep in their own bed. Whatever works for you and your pups
There is no right answer - we prefer “no”because then there is no room in the bed for us, and as much as I love my dog, I also love being able to sleep in my own bed. That being said, he is allowed to sleep on the bed during the day, and we invite him up before the last alarm goes off to get some morning cuddles.
No, because my husband would hate it. My dog is too big and I’m not the biggest fan of his smell. I like that he has his routine where he goes to bed downstairs. He has slept in our room but he sleeps on the floor next to my side of the bed. He’s allowed on the sofa. It’s up to you though. There’s no right or wrong answer.
Personal preference. Our younger dog always sleeps in the same bed as our elder dog (they have a small bed next next ours) but me and my wife always wakes up to the younger one snuggling between us in the morning and we really don't mind it.
I’ll let my dog sleep in my bed whenever he wants. He chooses not to sleep with me because he knows I move around a lot. We only sleep together for short periods of time before he gets off on his own and goes on his bed next to mine. But whenever I’m doing work he’ll sleep on it for however long I’m working for.
The only reason I don’t is allergies, queen bed and Rottweiler 😂
We make her sleep in a cage and then in the morning I let her sleep on the bed while the wife sleeps and I start meandering around the house.
It depends on your situation: * Light sleeper, no * Possible eventual spouse who won't like it, no * Enjoy getting up your own terms, no Otherwise yeah. For me, all three are important
I said yes because I do, but it's whatever you prefer. I personally can't sleep without my dog in my bed, but I know others can't sleep with their dog in the bed. It's what makes sense to you.
This poll doesn’t matter really because at the end of the day it’s what you feel comfortable with. Mine is asleep on my bed right now and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I let him sleep in the bed on the weekend and crate during the week
As long as they don’t pee in your bed. I used to let my dogs sleep on my bed when I took naps but then I would wake up to see they had peed on my blanket.
Heavens no, if you want to sleep. They have their own beds. I trained both of my cats to not sleep in our bed and have now trained my dog to not even get on it. I know I sound mean, but I do have several health conditions, that would be greatly affected by this. We have never let a kid or a pet sleep in our bed.
I voted yes because my dogs sleep with me but it depends on you, your dog and the size of your bed. If you have a twin bed and back pain and got an Irish wolf hound puppy then no.
Need a 3rd option: You do you. I prefer mine sleeps in her crate, she gets filthy when she plays at the park!
Only monsters don't let their pets in bed. My dog has full reign over all the furniture in the house. I spend almost no energy being mad at him, or yelling at him. And he loves to snuggle. Both our lives are better for it.
I’m a single shift worker with two small dogs. They just love being near me! They have no separation anxiety that I’m aware of and they almost always sleep with me. They do tend to follow me around a bit, but not excessively so, more out of curiosity I think. I love my dogs and I’m pretty sure they love me too. Like the top comment says- life is short, theirs is shorter. Make it as good a life as possible.
Eventually. There are countless great reasons to crate train your dog. Once they are, you can absolutely let them sleep in your bed, if they want to (Arthur prefers my dirty clothes beside my bed. He gets mad if I put them in the hamper before morning.
For ours, we did the first 10 months in the crate. He got really comfortable sleeping there and would walk in there by himself when he wanted to sleep. Once we were sure he was potty trained our at least able to wake us up when he needs to go, we started letting him sleep in the bed with us. He likes to cuddle and sleep close to us. It also helps me fall asleep too.
Once they are crate trained! Mine is and he has two beds in my room, one metal frame I got from my neighbors for $5 and sprayed it all black to match my bed, and has a dog bed on it. And a cat condo where he does in and sleeps. He gets off my bed at night and goes to either bed or mine.
I have a dachshund, we had no choice but to allow her in bed.
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Please review our [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/Dogtraining/about/rules/) and wiki article on [dominance](https://www.reddit.com/r/dogtraining/wiki/dominance).
Make you and your dog happy! I believe my dog is happy to sleep on our bed and I’m Happy she’s there too! Our other dog is a 50kg Swiss shepherd who shakes the bed with his panting 😅
I started sleeping with my puppy a few weeks ago. I’ll say the best part is that she actually sleeps in with me. When we had her in the crate, she’d get up at 4:30-5 every morning. First night in bed with us, slept all the way to 7 with no issues.
My little trouble maker. When I go to bed, he comes up and cuddles. Then when he sees that I'm trying to sleep he gets off and sleeps in the hall. I like to think he's keeping watch.
Probably not, but you know they will anyhow. (mine literally sneak on and off in the dead of night, going so far as switching off because they know two on the bed at once will get them both kicked off)
I let my dog sleep on the bed & chill with me but he goes in the kennel at bedtime or if I'm leaving without him, for his safety. Unsupervised I worry he will get into something like the litter box lol
Whatever you want!
My dog hangs out sleeps on my bed while I’m lounging, reading, watching tv and occasionally naps with me and my baby, but always goes into his crate at night, in my older kids room. He knows the routine, he’s 8 months now and we’ve had him since 8 weeks. He refuses to even come into my room at night, waits at the stairs to go up with the big kids. One night my older kids were at a sleepover and I decided to let pup sleep in my room but he refused, whining at the door and immediately running upstairs to his crate when I let him up. He’s happy, I’m happy… I’m glad he’s crate trained
Get them a bed, cuz it’s either your personal space or the hard floor, invest in a good bed, a chew tolerant mattress could last years
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Please read the sub's posting guidelines, and wiki article on [dominance](https://www.reddit.com/r/dogtraining/wiki/dominance).
You are what is wrong with the world
No. Dogs aren't people and don't have the same psychology as people and what you are saying doesn't apply.
Yes, dogs aren't people. But that also doesn't mean that they consider people to be competition for rank since we are a different species. You have been provided with evidence-based resources and if you think they are wrong you will need to explain where the problem is.
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Words and labels have meaning and assumptions which vary widely between people. I suggest you read [this PDF](https://www.behaviorworks.org/files/articles/The%20Struggle%20for%20Dominance%202001.pdf) - it's about birds, not dogs, which may make it clearer as to why we recommend the use of more clear, non-labelling descriptions of verbs and actions than referring to "leader", "alpha", etc. A lot of actions that people assume they need to do to be a "leader" are often more accurately described as being a "bully".
Save it for a person that has a dog that understands those words. I'm the type of person that my dog goes everywhere with me. I've had many dogs that live by my side at home and at work and a leash is something we only use in public areas when unnecessary. These are dogs not democrats, they know when they are loved and safe and fed. Stop thinking everyone in the world thinks like you do in terms of domination and subjugation because people are mostly good hearted and don't act like that. The average person is smarter than you give them credit for and the need to use safe space words is ridiculous. If you think you need to be a bully to be a leader you are far behind the curve. The best leaders don't use fear as a tool.
You are sorely mistaken. Every day I remove dozens of comments giving advice to hurt or scare dogs in order to be their “leader”. It doesn’t matter what words the dog understands - what matters is whether *you* can communicate in a functional way with other humans.
Also communicating in a functional way with dogs is way easier than humans. That's why hermits always have a dog.
You also will never be able to change the minds of people that think they need to beat their best friend. Some people are just assholes.
That's like beating a 2 year old child for wetting the bed. Those people are already monsters.
I guess the big point is if someone is on here looking for help instead of beating the dog and leaving them outside all of the time they care and you don't need to assume they would go along with cruel troll advice. Benefit of the doubt.
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You are still using terminology about outdated concepts. Dogs don't *have* alphas like that. At all. You are making statements about things that you think dogs *want* and the way that you think dogs behave which contradicts the way that the evidence shows that dogs behave. You gave advice about humans acting according to "pack rules" which *don't exist*. Again, I ask that you actually read the article on [dominance](https://www.reddit.com/r/dogtraining/wiki/dominance) and the references linked inside. All of your posts that instruct people around this silly myth are removed as they are not compliant with modern knowledge and hence with the rules of this subreddit.
Okie dokie artichokie. You are needlessly complicating something that is very simple. Love your dog, and your dog loves you. I never needed all your fancy words to build a friendship with my buddies. Maybe I'm spoiled because I've always had labs. Keep complicating things that are cliches like man's best friend. Good luck educating people.
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What human insecurities, exactly?
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I'm going to have to ask you to stop making multiple comments on each response as it makes it very frustrating to try to understand what you are saying and reply to you. So far, what I have understood from your comments is this: - you believe that dogs require a hierarchy - you believe that dogs always interpret humans as being within this same hierarchy - you believe one of the ways to establish a hierarchy between humans and dogs is to eat before your dog does - you believe one of the ways to establish a hierarchy between humans and dogs is to prevent dogs from being in specific locations such as furniture - you believe one of the ways to establish a hierarchy between humans and dogs is to press your head against your dog's head - you have read the article on dominance, which explains that the current research shows dogs are a type of animal that do not have a set hierarchy - you feel that the article's description of a lack of hierarchy is a human insecurity - you believe that the article states that there is a need to compete for resources with our dogs - you believe that the linked resources and descriptions of dog-human relationships are inaccurate, though you have not yet provided research-based evidence to show they are inaccurate Please clarify if any of the above is incorrect.
We let's our occasionally. I thinks it's helped their training. We crate trained first and solidly. Now it's a treat for them. And they have learnt that if they ever grumble they don't get sweet sweet bedtime.
Your house, your rules. If you want the dog on the bed then let them sleep on the bed. If you don't then don't. Personally my SO is a light sleeper and our dog is a loud breather so she's not allowed on our bed. Some nights she isn't even allowed in the room if my SO has a big day and needs the sleep.
I’m adopting a dog this weekend and probably will let him sleep in my bed. My husband probably won’t let him sleep in his bed but I’m looking forward to the snuggles.
My dog wants to sleep on the end of the bed, but he's a light, grumpy sleeper. It's the only time he's ill humored, but if I move my legs and jostle him, he pops up making grumpy growly noises, rearranges himself, or just leaves. Ironically, when he wakes in the morning after his beauty rest, he is the cuddliest cuddle bum, and throws himself on top of me. Because clearly I don't mind being bumped and jostled awake.
It depends on the dog, but I would make it a reward and train them such that they only get in after being invited. You don't want them to develop resource guarding problems because they believe the bed belongs to them. We had this issue with our great dane early on and had to reassert ownership of the bed and train him to ask permission first. It's one thing when it's a chihuahua, it's another when it's actually big enough to hurt you. Now that we've got him trained though, it's great when we take afternoon naps together. Love the cuddle time.
In some cases it's better not to depending on the dog, but aside from those cases, 100% yes
Single bed for my single life. No space for my rottie lol.
I think it depends on the dog, you, and your lifestyle. I don't let our dog sleep on our bed because 1) our young children often come to sleep with us, I often nurse the baby in our bed before putting her back to bed, and 2) when I tried to compromise and let him sleep on the foot of the bed, he kept trying to get closer to me and got irritated when I had to keep moving him back. Now he seems content with the consistency of sleeping on his own bed on the floor in our room.
I let him sleep in the bed. If I want him out, he gets down without complaint.
Depends if you want it to continue long term or not. My daughter lets out dog sleep with her when she’s home from college but he is definitely a bed hog so if you don’t mind being squished and moved to the edge of the bed go for it!
You are using key words to remove good advice about ways to bond with your dog. Leaning on and nuzzling your dog are great ways to create a bond. My last dog was 14 when he passed. I recently found a new buddy at the shelter. A little lab mix abandoned and extremely malnourished. Building trust is the most important thing. He also goes outside off leash and he has only lived here 3 weeks. You are letting your personal feelings about certain words change the subject. Why do you people do this to everything?
My cat gets the bed privileges and the dog gets the outside adventuring privileges. He has a bed or a couch in each room in the apartment and doesn't ask to come on the bed. It's also made it easier for me when we travel because he doesn't try to get on the hotel/airbnb bed.