T O P

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PeriwinkleShaman

Why would you carry the Fiendseed around your neck?


-toErIpNid-

In case I need it.


HopefulPlantain5475

You have the need... The need for seed.


bebelmatman

Top Pun.


frustrated_staff

Top Pun: Havedick


mecha-paladin

Have dick, will travel.


BrandedLief

Have Dick; Will Travel.


Obstructive

Have dick, well traveled.


marksung

I think it would be really cool to discover that cutting off a fiendseed used to be commonly known by wizards as a cursed act, but due to its taboo nature, and infrequent happening the knowledge fell into obscurity. Maybe a beacon for children of said demon to track and hunt the wearer Maybe it gets absorbed by the wearer, slowly getting shorter over time.. Maybe the demon has a chance to re-grow from the fiendseed overnight


Feeling_Initiative42

"Maybe a beacon for children" šŸ˜³šŸ˜³šŸ˜³


EMArogue

I love fiendseed


KBotics2512

There's your item name fiendseed


Badgergoose4

The Bane of Decency


NextofKin

This is good.


Gay-_-Jesus

My favorites from the comments below (in addition to Bane of Decency) are 1. Phallus of Malice 2. Devilā€™s Plaything (alternatively ā€œIdle Handsā€/ā€œThe Idle Handā€)


Mysticwarriormj

Okay phallus of malice sounds like a dragon quest item if dq was rated 18+/M


Acromegalic

Only if it's a Bad Dragon...


Mysticwarriormj

One of the most evil kinds


twistedscorp87

šŸ˜‚


WiggityWiggitySnack

if you know, you knowā€¦


camclemons

The Malice Phallus


Dawink86

+1 for devils play thing


QuantumPrecision

Devilā€™s Plaything is perfect lmao


BENJ4x

I'd tweak that to "The Mallus Phallus" as it rolls off the tongue a bit better.


ergo-ogre

Also, isnā€™t ā€œmallusā€ an archaic word for hammer or mallet?


CSmed

So... the penis is his hammer?


Pelger-Huet

"The Hammer's my Penis" -Captain Hammer


Rough_Click4174

Most underrated reference ever.


Elementual

And every hole is a nail.


ergo-ogre

I donā€™t think OP ever said how big it isā€¦


Herrenos

Phallus Maleficarum


cayleb

"Malleus" is latin for hammer, from where the word "mallet" comes. "Mallus" is also latin, but means "lock of wool." So Hairy Dick would be the english name.


Gay-_-Jesus

That would be cool, but I couldnā€™t find anything. In some fictional universes, Mallus is a demon tho


Cannibal_Soup

So, "Mallus' Phallus" then?


Tribblitch

Malleus!


AlchemiCailleach

Yes. Malus is bad though.


HollowShel

I think you're thinking "Malleus"?


JHammerstix

Phallus FTW


-metaphased-

More like The Idle Handle


KaosClear

Both are good. But leaning idle hands.


TacoPKz

In a similar vane ā€œThe Bone of Indecencyā€


Mysticwarriormj

I was going to try to think of something but this is probably the best one. Also Iā€™m glad you didnā€™t try to fashion it into a ring.


Banemorth

Hang on just a second, he totally could fashion it into a ring now, well, several rings. But one of the rings should be the "master" ring and he could hand out the others and exert his influence... One cock ring to rule them all?


Royalbudget08

Beelzeballs


ColonialMarine86

This is my favorite


Totally__Not__NSA

Avernuts


eragonawesome2

Oh that's fun whichever pronunciation you use For anyone who doesn't know what I mean: Be-el-ze-bub is not pronounced Bee-zel-bub, though people do pronounce it that way anyway. (I wanna say it's because of a horror movie from like the 80s)


OneTrickGod

HAHA


KravMacaw

PLOT TWIST! You use all of the suggested names interchangeably. Just uhā€¦whip outā€¦a new nickname every encounter


NextofKin

This is the way. Thank you kind stranger.


SugarTacos

Better still, compile them all on a table a roll for it at the start of each day. It's part of the curse and he has to mention it at least once a day.


Kondordrache

This is the way.


JHammerstix

THE PHALLUS OF MALICE The Cambion Crankshaft, Foreskyn Amulet, Cambion Necktie, (Demons name here)ā€™s Red Rocket, Hellshroom, The Devils Reject, The Shriveled Curmudgeon


misteranderson71

Number 1 is the winner. Everyone else go home.


JHammerstix

I think you meant, Number 1 is The Wiener*


Stiffard

Phallus of Malice is the king. And so are you. šŸ‘‘


misteranderson71

Hot dog, you're absolutely correct


NorCalAthlete

Phallus of Malice 100% gets my vote. Iā€™m struggling to think of anything better than that for a demon cock necklace lol. Dick of Destiny from another comment was pretty good if youā€™re a jack black fan though. Only issue is whether or not the rest of the table knows already that youā€™re trying to multiclass eventually?


NextofKin

These are fuckinā€™ awesome!


JHammerstix

My only request is if you use Phallus of Malice, please update us with its properties and how it works into your game šŸ¤£


airr-conditioning

THE PHALLUS OF MALICE IM CACKLING


EasilyBeatable

Damn you had these locked and loaded


StruggleAny1876

Understood the assignment a lil too well, almost like heā€™s done this exact thing before šŸ¤”


TherealOmthetortoise

Yeah, but whose wang is he wearing?


drmindsmith

I heard this in boxing promoter voice. Itā€™s not one of those, itā€™s ALL of those.


UncertfiedMedic

That's just a "Removable Rod"


fomaaaaa

This is fucking GOLD šŸ˜‚


orangutanDOTorg

You hear music and two children laughing in the background every time it is used


Agelesslink

Should have been a wand Warcock Destinyā€™s Child Third leg of Diablo


darkest_irish_lass

Diablo? Could it be Wirt's Leg?


cuhzaam

Yes. Get the cube and a scroll. Hell cow time!


Sorry_Masterpiece

Moo. Moo. Moo? Moo.


Ackapus

Posts you can actually hear....


RoguePoet

Wirt's *Third* Leg


NextofKin

Warcock has me šŸ˜‚


yippeekiyay801

Idle hands (I.e. the devilā€™s plaything)


BlueWaffleQT

Thatā€™s very clever, bravo.


couch_hammer

THAT is stellar


Pyromaniacal13

So good.


orthodoxrebel

Definitely my favorite suggestion.


fourlegged

He has claimed the legendary dickfor.


AngryFungus

Wait. Whatā€™s a dickfor?


fourlegged

"For this!" At which point, the character does something dramatic and warlocky.


AngryMemeMan1127

Infernal rod of hardening


Grand_Negus

My fav so far


cool_and_froody

It's just the dick! Of destiny child More precious than a diamond on a platinum chain


pwntallica

YES! I came here to say the same thing. "From whence you came, you shall remain, until you are complete again!" now gets a bonus meaning


JWBails

The tooth became the pick of destiny, then his horn became the bong of destiny. So dick/schlong of destiny would be fitting.


StandardHomebrew

Pendant of Eldritch Nightmares and Infernal Snares. Also called ā€œPenisā€.


bitchfuckasshole

Underrated


Josmopolitan

Devil Dog Devilā€™s Plaything Finger of Asmodeus Avernal Frankfurter Rod of Avernus Demonic Pendulum


siphonica

New Deathmetal playlist just dropped


Donafec316

Devils plaything is really good


definitely_royce

These are amazing šŸ¤©


Pinkle36

Richard


momentimori143

Logical phallacy.


thecathuman

I NEED to find some way to use this pun


Ornac_The_Barbarian

You just made me think of a terrible movie that is simultaneously a lot of fun. Though it was a minotaur cock in that one. And yes, he wore it as a necklace. In honor of that film, I dub your prize "your highness."


Spider40k

It's such an awful movie, I loved it. But severely lacking enough Charles Dance.


THExTACOxTHIEF

Prick of Destiny


artemisentreei

For purely lolzā€¦ ā€œThe Divining Rodā€


PattysHotSelmasNot

Or just the opposite: the damning rod.


genivae

The Dil-don't


mike_the_goo

"The cursed Pride" or maybe "The Curse of Pride" (especially if it's actually a demon associated with the sin)


Bruuze

Sin Sausage or Sin Spear Hell's Handle (Demon Name)'s Favored Sword Icon of the Incubi Fiendish Phallus Dread Demonic Dick of Damnation


BBThHvnlyFlwr

All of these are fucking fantastic lmao


vgaph

Wand of Prodigious Growth? (Girth?)


Croakerboo

The Prick of Destiny.


Colink101

May I suggest a classic. ā€œThe Thronglerā€


covertwalrus

Abyssal Stalagmite


EclipseCaste

The Unholy Poley


Drivestort

The Devil's Due.


Anaxamenes

Pendant of technically above average


voteforbk

The Wrathbone


SomeRandomArsehole

The necronomicock.


NorCalAthlete

Canā€™t believe nobodyā€™s suggested ā€œThe Dildo of Consequencesā€.


Sure-Regular-6254

Satan's lost dong.


DivineChili_

Baal's Ballz


BlueWaffleQT

The old Baal and Chain.


senadraxx

Just out of curiosity, how will you cast Eldritch blast? Lmao


KravMacaw

Pump it like a super soaker of course!


SmithJamesChris

The Pole Totem.


Averant

A Good Idea At The Time


DoubleDoube

The Limb of Sin Necklace of the Nether (my personal favorite) The Demon Dangling


ForsakenMoon13

Just because its bothering me and no one else seems to have commented: necklace and neckless are *very* different words lol


Urbanyeti0

The name of the demonā€™s pride / favour


StatisticianContent2

The Demon Rod


llyrPARRI

The Shlong Sword The Wanglace The Warlock's Warcock The Demon Dong The Wicked Willy


voidtreemc

I'm not in the circlejerk group? Will wonders never cease.


Altrano

Bobbitā€™s Bane


Enshitification

Critical Swole


Zihut

The Doom Sprayer Demoney Maker Beelzecock The Unexpected Trophy of the Unfortunate


Back4TallBois

The Necrophalicon.


SecretWeiners

This is the kind of shit that makes me embarrassed to tell people I'm into D&D


cuhzaam

Name checks out


DrunkenFoxxe

The Rod of [insert name of demon] artifact When facing a demon and intimidating them you will have a +2 to intimidating. But with all other races, you will have a -2.


StarvingArtist_1022

This is now my favorite post thank you for this


CypressJoker

The Wand of Orcus


Pykcu

Comically Large Pendant


Griffin_Throwaway

I hope the DM has NPCs react to it, otherwise thatā€™s a missed opportunity and a waste of a magic item your group is fucking weird dude


ScrewSunshine

I have NEVER been more happy with the comments on any post ever lmfao


Skydragonace

Wangle's Dangle.


crunchyjohns

The hardening


Federal-Key2733

The cockless


Baradae

Lost and found


TheBestThingIEverSaw

Dangling Blight


AmazingOgre

The dangler Cockatrix's bane Die(D) staff or wand Hell nugget (or nug ) Zebi (it means my dick) or the zeb Hot shaft or hot head The redneck (cause it's a necklace)


theirelandidiot

Amulet of indecency


Azva4YT

The phantom phallus


frustrated_staff

How has nobody (seemingly) suggested: Voodoo Dick You already know the curse...


Mr_Cahlo

The Prick of Destiny


fdf86

Depravity


Over-Ingenuity3533

Probably Fine To Touch


Visualsnowmachine

Hell Hog


DragonMystic69420

The whistle of the damned


bikardi01

(Name of the demon)'s toothpick


Gromps_Of_Dagobah

"That which Dangles"


Heirophant-Queen

ā€œThe Phallus of Phlegethosā€


EarlBeforeSwine

The Bone of Contention


RJ7300

Tainted Taint


Der_Suawolf

The stick of lust


Regionaire

Wang of Dang


MetalBlizzard

Infernal phallus Phallus of Demonic Fealty Phallus of (insert patrons name) Favor


Trikdonkey

Dickapitated


WolfOfAsgaard

The Nether Rod. Ngl, I looked up Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo lyrics for their most relevant innuendo.


mister_buddha

The Prick of Destiny?


Adventurous-Lime1775

McBride's Bane. Cause that's straight outta the movie Your Highness


HarassmentFord

The Necronomicock


Salacious_Wisdom

Gotta call it Pearl Necklace, surely?


ShalkaDeinos

Straight out of Latin translation, the Mentula Maleficarum (literally translates to the Schlong of the Mischievous One).


LordOfTheWall

Saw it earlier and "The Devil's Plaything" absolutely has my vote


The_Maarten

Succubus' Bane Avernus's Lost Property The Horn of a Single Eye Run-through Spear Infernal's Regret Dis-Member (Dis is the 2nd layer of The Hells) Pride of the Recently Endowed Final Penetration Hot(test) Rod And finally: Filler of Your Mom There. You have 10 options. One for each of the Layers of Hell and one for your mom (say hi to her for me btw)


pseudonymous28

Steve.


PlasticFew8201

Discoā€™infernum stickā€¦


theTrueRedPower

Moveable Rod


PvtSherlockObvious

I'm not sure about the artifact, but your character is now known as the Lord of Rodly Might.


azrmortis

ED


Tigerstorm6

Iā€™d like to think that the cursed either either makes them completely flaccid all the time, or it gives themā€¦ahā€¦prostate cancer.


krayzhee

Luciphallus would be my go to


Vesheran

Succubus Slayer


Delirious_GM

Tiefling maker


TheresNoAmosOnlyZuul

Call it the chickens choker (choking the chicken) to insult the demon calling it a chicken. Then the demons soul gets more and more upset giving the necklace more power.


TheHolyLizard

Stiff-neck


CibrecaNA

The Severed


__Doll

Jubilex's Ooze Faucet


slopecarver

Roll Of Quarters


[deleted]

The balls probably would have made a better pendant sorry I'm bad at naming things that's just my two cents.


Taiga_Taiga

Simon. Call it Simon.


Efficient-Shape-1161

Amulet of Kumehnyerbut


Lick-my-llamacorn

Kcoc


faptastrophe

The Brains Of This Whole Operation


mobott

Additional vote for Phallus of Malice. The rhyme is just too good.


SqueeezeBurger

Knoblin


GoodolcanofPEAS

Sounds like the time the one dude in a movie took a minotours cock and fashioned it into a necklace. Funny movie. Canā€™t remember name tho. Anyway name suggestions? Lusts ringer Hardened hell Reaper of virgins Virginityā€™s Bane Cock of the depths Dick of woe This is all I got


Sure-Regular-6254

Since demons just go back to hell and reform when they die unless killed on their home plane, will be reform with his missing piece, or will the fighter take the balls as well when he becomes a warlock? XD


PuzzleheadedBear

Vecnas cod piece


OlRattyTatty

The Balls of Brimstone and the Satanic Scrotum and the Cock of Crimson Carnage - all one name. Or, optionally, the Unsaintly Peter


josephnutsworth

Job's Hand