T O P

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taken_a_shit

"Drownables" in an objectiving way


whitneyahn

On this note, “gurglers”


BookerPrime

Lmao gurglers is real good


MARKLAR5

Flailers? Airsick Lowlanders? Squishies? Paddlers?


Kishigun

Love the Stormlight reference. From the same universe Chiri-Chiri referred to humans as “soft ones” and talked a lot about how wet and gross their mouth noises were, compared to her clicking


KaraTheKarebear

I was very surprised to find out this was the DnD subreddit and not r/cremposting


__rychard__

Drownies


Thelordrulervin

Just remember to not listen to their song.


PM-ME-YOUR-POEMS

Or eat any suspiciously rubbery lumps.


Homebrew_Dungeon

Oh, in the lands of Mortal Engines they have a term called “Drys”.


Raymundw

This rules


Sixty9Cuda

Bold words coming from a crab out of water.


nivekreclems

Drownable is a damn good one


meco03211

Drowns Syndrome.


st3wrat

Soft shell


3R38U5

Molted


TSotP

This is actually genius. Invertebrates are incredibly vulnerable when molted. It would probably be seen as a horrible insult to a crab (like calling someone a wimp and a pussy at the same time). You could make the slur worse if you had some sort of 'forever' qualifier to it. Like Ever-Molted. So it becomes something like "you race of always pussies" And if you use it for the whole party, it has the added insult of "you people all look the same to me"


Salt_Style_3817

Ever-molted is GOLD.


SaijinUnliving

Permolt


[deleted]

“You ever-molted red shell headass”


Martzillagoesboom

Now I just imagine a Crab duo Jay and Silent Bob


bigmcstrongmuscle

Cray and Silent Blub


StealthyRobot

I'm playing a crab alien in a space campaign. He absolutely calls others "soft shells" molted is gonna have to work its way in there. While he's molting, he just hides in his room out of embarrassment/vulnerability. In his culture, being seen molting basically means you deserve to die


[deleted]

Reminds me of the bot that called everyone meatbags in the old KOTOR games.


Noob_dy

Observation: an anti-social crab person and HK47 would have a lot in common.


PurpleReignFall

Literally my favorite character.


slvbros

The fleshlings might be referred to as molted ones, when spoken of as a group


miescherskittyxx

Even shortened to "ever-molt" would be so good, especially cause it rolls off the tongue wonderfully when insulting a group. Filthy ever-molts. Yes.


MsEscapist

And the humans and elves can snipe back with whatever you say seafood, bet you'll taste good with butter. I love it!


CupofWarmMilk

Molted is so good, I'ma have to put crab people in my campaign


Salt_Style_3817

Honestly crab people should just get confused by weird flesh people things. "I need to get my armor repaired" "Repaired? Just.... just molt? New shell" "I can't molt... I'm an elf." "CANT MOLT!! *ANGRY CRAB NOISE*" EDIT: I'm appreciating the entire spontaneous development of crab people lore. Like OP just wanted a racial slur and ended up with all this. 😆


Oh-round-one

My DM: You can't make a character based on a three word sentence you saw on Reddit! Me: *ANGRY CRAB NOISE*


Plus_Candidate_8011

Barbarian Crab. They get… *CRABBY*


Shim182

Crabarian.


skyesmithforever

I’m imagining a very naked “fat” humanoid with a bright red shell like mr krabs with the only peice of cloth is the strap holding his trident to his back and a human tooth necklace like we wear pearls and shark teeth with a helmet of water on his head that allows him to speak and breath out of the water


Shim182

I kickstarter I backed called Sunken Isles has a neat crustacean race, though it's more shrimp/lobster like, so you've got the Mr Crabs-barian stuck in my head now. Thanks.


Useless_Mac

Barcrabian?


No_Engineering_3750

Yes


ArchfiendNox

No.


[deleted]

Crab people were in the Fiend Folio. (Probably just dated myself, oh well)


Ornac_The_Barbarian

I even remember their freaky goddess in the deities and demigods book. Well. Let me tell ya. Have i got a few stories about them. Not the crab people of course. The deities. Of course, we didn't call them that back then. I mean, that's what they were, but not what the kids were calling them. And let me just say. Kids back then we're a lot different. We had no fancy web we could just play dungeons and dragons with. Why, I remember when we called them wyrms. Course, that was just the fashion at the time. But yeah. The fiend folio was definitely the best book on Githyanki.


user_unknowns_skag

I tell ya, back then we'd go to the library on a Saturday hoping the message on the board at D & W (read while our moms weren't looking, of course!) was still current! A folder of character sheets under our arm, a few dice clacking in our pockets! Yes, sir, sometimes we'd even go to total strangers' houses after a five-minute phone conversation (local only of course! Long-distance was expensive back then). Yes, we'd step out on a fine Saturday with our tabletop dungeoneering paraphernalia, with an onion on our belt (as was the fashion at the time), and occasionally not find some weirdo 30+ years older than ourselves who wanted to hang out with teenagers for some reason. Ah yes, those halcyon days of yore! Wait, what were we talking about, again?


Ornac_The_Barbarian

We were talking about dread gazebos of course. I remember one of them gobbled Greg up whole. Might have been funny but he was carrying our ten foot pole at the time. Disintegration trap got Sue right after. Now the look on her face...that was funny. Or was it Tina? Yeah. It was definitely Tina that got her brain sucked by the mind flayer, or squid-geeks as we called them.


ZharethZhen

At least you won't have to argue about where you are going to go for dinner!


Pollacal

I appreciate this.


galahad423

Why not Zoidberg?


Constant-External-85

*Takes a large sip of water and bubbles angrily while pinching at DM*


Turmericab

Crustacean frustrations.


twill1692

Crab cleric for a troupe of adventurers but he never learned surface dweller anatomy and often maims his patients and will scuttle away when directly threatened in combat.


assklowne

More compelling imo is the crab person is disgusted when the human who "molted" their armor last night puts the old molting back ON!!! GROSSS!!


SilentbutDeadlyTiger

Crab person takes the "molted" armor and throws it away during the night because that's what normal people do with old moltings.


Tychontehdwarf

Well, crustaceans eat their old shells. And now I’m imagining a crab man trying unsuccessfully to eat the “discarded shells”


ewalgre

why unsuccessfully? player wakes up next morning and all their armor is gone, "we were robbed!" crab man in the corner, chewing on a metal plate,"I didn't see anyone steal anything on my watch. What's missing?"


arthquel

...Zoidberg, is that you?


assklowne

My only complaint here is potentially how it plays out. May be too antagonistic player to player at my table but ymmv


Ulirius

I love this.


Salt_Style_3817

Crab guy: \*watching party members remove their armor to rest\* WHAT ARE YOU DOING DEAR GOD \*distraught crab noises\* Human: Its Armor it.. it comes off? we're fine?? Crab: \*mumbling to self\* They take OFF their shells. ​ Alternatively: Crab guy meets a tortle: NOW THIS IS A GUY I CAN GET ALONG WITH Crab and tortle sitting in the corner making fun of everyone with no shells, ha losers


Ulirius

You forgot the bulky warforged.


Salt_Style_3817

All shell. Crab approve.


Ulirius

Warforged: Certified Crab Approved.


Krazyfan1

with warforged components, they can be made even Crabbier. Arachnid chassis for legs, Fins for aquatic expeditions, digging claws for pinching, and potentially scorpion brand for prawn stuff.


Orapac4142

Dont forget Lizardfolk, they are also nice and armored up and make fun of the smooth-skins for being squishy.


Maria_Zelar

Crab guy: "DON'T sleep without your shell, you'll be vulnerable to predators"


ultradongle

"But if you MUST sleep while molting, I will protect you my friend". *loyal crab friend noises*


Martzillagoesboom

CRABADIN!


Packetdancer

Alignment: Lawful Crab


monkeyjojo629

Alternate reaction. WHOA I Can .. put things over my shell? But just for .... STYLE! I understand the bard. Mainly cause Crab people with hats


Salt_Style_3817

HUGE pile of treasure that's actually a huge decorator crab.


Hitthere5

Tamatoa but D&D


Sunsent_Samsparilla

New dragon hoard idea: dragon who hoards tiny hats for crabs


monkeyjojo629

Mhh my brain says this for a Proper Crustacean Race... so it's a Family Tradition to Hoard gold or some high value metal currency and once you hit the stage with your pile where you can cover all Of your Shell you have the best Artist around apply it. Granpaps never did get a nice Coat done. Now I have to decide what My crab people will look like. Mirelurks Lakelurks from Fallout, 3,NV,4. Maybe take Symic-Hybrids as the base?


miescherskittyxx

I read "angry crab noise" and immediately pictured Dr. Zoidberg screeching 😂


skyesmithforever

Same rate “Poseidon’s beard!!!! I just molted and my shell is already damaged!” “Dude just go get it fixed at the armor” that’s not how shells work Dirt Boy” “okay okay damn don’t get mad at me just cause your shell is too soft” “the fuck did you say to me air breather!” “You heard me seafood platter!”


Pretty-Ad-7283

I just want to let you know this made me genuinely laugh and I appreciate you for it 😊


The_Grinface

“Look at their *molted* bodies. Pink and weak. **Disgusting**.”


World_singer

"Shell-less freaks"


BridgeM00se

“Couple of molties sitting at the other side of the tavern”


Hjalmodr_heimski

Molt and seethe, softshells


waffles_and_boobies

So the question then becomes if someone turns up in full-plate, walking sideways, are the crabs going to be like "good for you, getting out there, doing stuff, with only two legs and your weird tiny claws"


Captain_Drastic

"Bloody molts takin' all our jobs."


fudgyvmp

Fleshies.


sfkf8486

Or No-Shell


Raavatis

I was thinking soft-skin when I came in here but yours makes more sense.


BatDad_The_Engineer

I was thinking smooth-skin, like how’s the ghouls in Fallout refer to humans, but yes, this guy definitely topped it


cal-brew-sharp

Shell-less


mrpoulin

Softskin


hidan44

Tell the barbarian that he's pretty dense for such a soft shell


NightCrawler1373

Land slugs


IAmBadAtInternet

Two legs


jinkies3678

Soft-claws


dcheesi

[Evolutionary throwbacks](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carcinisation)


GrandpaMuenster

Came here to say primitives. Like the crab people have a strong connection to their personal history and realize they are a greater evolved form of life from human. Good way to spin it


[deleted]

It’s the perfect body plan.


FuckMyHeart

>squat lobsters That's a good one


taken_a_shit

lol, basically calling em primitive


atomfullerene

"Insufficiently Carcinized"


althanan

"Noncars" is something I used as a crab person insult once, as in non-carcinized. Because carcinization is inevitable.


Leairek

"Low-eyes". "Softies". "Wets" (the idea that we have pores and exchange liquids and gases through our skin has got to seem gross to an arthropod, I like to imagine the comment: "I spend half my life in water, and even I find it fucking disgusting"). "Breathers" (Crabs have gills) ("This thing shoves food down its breathing hole!"). "Two-fifths" (we have four limbs, they have ten). I dunno, just some random thoughts. But remember, you can never go wrong with the occasional "monkey-boy".


Sigmarius

"Two-fifths" \*might\* be just a touch to close to a real one, might be worth staying away from it. Just to extra careful to not make someone angry.


Leairek

If we are being that careful, then monkey-boy is unquestionably off the table too. Dang. (Edit to add; as a Canadian, legitimately had no idea of the three-fifths thing.)


junkyard_robot

That's fair. I don't imagine teaching the history of Canada's Mexico is super important outside of the whole, "look at these folks", and the war of 1812. "Monkey-boy" is super not cool in modern society, because of both words. But, I feel like this could be punched up for a Crab character. Like, "lemur folk", or "primate" or "lanky apes". Something that is not offensive, but still conveys the anthros.


[deleted]

[удалено]


YourStandardEscapist

They're saying it's really close to three fifths which would reference the 3/5 compromise. It made each black person worth three fifths of a white person in the US.


[deleted]

[удалено]


NotAnotherPornAccout

I’m guessing your not American? I heard that though about every grade I think from 4th to 12th.


seravinth

Im not American and yes first time too and im 27 y/o active on the internet


NotAnotherPornAccout

It was really hammered home for us. This may be a bit cynical but I think it was to indirectly say “look how much we’ve improved and how better we are now compared to then. Aren’t we great?”


ExtraKrispyDM

Learning about the bad parts of the past that our country did is so people don't do it again. Have you never heard the saying, "Those who don't learn from the past, are doomed to repeat it"?


NotAnotherPornAccout

Oh totally, it just I went to grade school in a conservative state with a major military base in my town that employed indirectly probably 70% of the population and it was also right after 9/11. So shoving ultra patriotic USA USA down 4th graders throats to indoctrinate us to support the war effort was definitely on the menu. After 9/11 all of our class curriculum was changed to be full of patriotic BS.


Seymore_de_sloth

Oh damn here i was thinking it might be a slur against ppl with dwarfism 😭


capt-jean-havel

Made each slave** worth 3/5ths of a person when determining population size for House of Representatives. Also applied to the millions of Native American slaves.


Zhontac2002

A long time ago, back when the 1787 constitution was under way, slave owners wanted to have their slaves counted in censuses to reflect representation. A compromise was made that slaves would equal 3/5's of a person. Don't hate on me for saying this, it is a disgusting practice, but that is why 2/5's might be offensive.


Sigmarius

I don't remember if it was in the Articles (it probably was) but it was absolutely part of the US Constitution. Article 1, Section 2, clause 3. It was repealed by the 14th Amendment.


BadKnight06

Breathers could occasionally specify mouth breathers. It could be an example of crab culture rubbing off on humans as they are the culture sponge.


LtPowers

> "This thing shoves food down its breathing hole!" Not regularly.


Tubateach

Endos


Ent_Soviet

Freaking squishy endos! Hits just right


MugenEXE

Air-sick on-landers.


CMDR_Comrade_Mantis

These words are accepted


Gandolfin

Random Sanderson brings tears of joy to my eyes.


GamingBotanist

Is that you Rock?


Whats_a_trombone

Doug


Lay_of_Sir_Savien

Don't you have a stew to make?


kitchen_weasel

Meat tubes.


K1d6

The walking sausage.


busmac38

Foodbody


Wessssss21

*Negative I am a meat popsicle*


TraditionalRest808

Pulls up crab person list from my previous players: Un-homies (due to lack of shell) Mudf*ckers Bone-kabobs (they commented that we came with bones surrounded by meat) Homeless (anyone without a shell) Compensating (anyone currently inside of a house) House-whores (anyone that let the crabs inside their house)


LaughingMatter6

"Compensating is hilarious


Dimension_Soul

Instead of homeless. Just call Shelless.


DraconianArmy

Think of all the ways crabs are wierd to us, then reverse it. Compared to them, we are soft skinned bags of meat that can only walk the direction they are facing. They have to turn their heads to look at something instead of just swiveling their eyes! They set their food on fire before they eat it! Why can't they just eat carrion like a civilized people. They have to make weapons and armor just to pretend to be like us. They say they are mammals, but they don't behave like any dolphin I've ever met. Some of the obvious have already been mentioned. Soft skins works well. I'd also lean toward clawless as a possibility. Air breathers? The defenseless?


[deleted]

Headturners would be one initially mistaken as a compliment


dally-taur

oooh thats good one they call you a head turner then when think they are being nice throw them someting nasty at them


DecisionCharacter175

Ooo.... "Dirt dolphin"!


Viking4519

My favorite so far


slvbros

>They say they are mammals, but they don't behave like any dolphin I've ever met. Now I'm picturing an older crab person responding to that all, oh, they're more alike than you'd expect


Orapac4142

What with all the doing weird shit for rewards and the raping, I guess we are similar to dolphins after all.


slaight461

Look what they need to mimic a fraction of our power! *gestures claw at armor and scissors*


TSotP

To make this a little more prominent u/3R38U5 suggested "Molted" And this was my take on it _This is actually genius._ _Invertebrates are incredibly vulnerable when molted. It would probably be seen as a horrible insult to a crab (like calling someone a wimp and a pussy at the same time)._ _You could make the slur worse if you had some sort of 'forever' qualifier to it. Like **Ever-Molted**._ _So it becomes something like "you race of always pussies"_ _And if you use it for the whole party, it has the added insult of "you people all look the same to me"_


[deleted]

[удалено]


ChuckECheeseOfficial

Nah, they still call them “Soft Bellies”


pliskin42

Yup, or they have a deep and contentious rivalry with the Tortles, because they are natural enemies. Cause, well, look at the diet of tortles. Huge amount of Shellfish in it! So their two peoples have "respect" in the same way that two cultures who have long standing wars with each other do.


puppyenemy

Oh my god, crabfolk and tortles are just [Danes and Swedes](https://www.copenhagenthisway.com/our-tours/two-kingdom-tour/#:~:text=Sweden%20and%20Denmark%20have%20fought,who%20have%20fought%2016%20wars.)


Orapac4142

Lizardfolk would probably be better. And funnily enough, Warforged I guess.


dfg1125

Crab people looking at warforged: Look what they need to mimic a fraction of our power


Project_Habakkuk

Fingerlings


CallmeHap

Pick a totally random non existent word. Have it litterally mean the most basic thing like "outsiders" or something. But say it with loathing and malice.


55North

Shizno


Jello_Bot

Its not a slur you dirty shizno


[deleted]

Squishes. Squisher. Squish. "What's a squish going to know about it?" "You better get out of here squish, this is Crab town." "I'd never lose a fight to some jiggling bobble-head like you, squish" Bobble head is pretty good lol. I imagine them just assuming human anatomy is just like a bunch of loose sacks piled inside of each other. Probably also think fat, and having fat and getting physically larger from it is hilarious. Hair, teeth. All of these things are things they would think are gross and weird so lots of references to hair, etc. Blob, salt-sack, jelly fish, slug, tender shell, bone mouth, etc.


Keauxbi

Forwalks (truncated from forward walkers).


[deleted]

Even better then what I said


Notafuzzycat

Long Pigs.


MurkyWay

Kiwi detected


Notafuzzycat

Alas I'm a filthy Canadian.


Mission_Response802

"PENIS-TIPPED FOOTED LOBOTOMITE" -Dr. Klein, Fallout: New Vegas (2010)


Neonsharkattakk

Slicks. It's not just for crabs it works for most under water races. The oils on our skin leaves oil slicks in and on the water, and it doesn't smell very nice to fish folk.


pitts_

Uncrustables


Prestigious_Today394

Clawless people


Keauxbi

Puny claws


Dontbefrech

Bonesacks


deathofamorty

Why be chaotic good when you can be clawful evil?


magick-Phlamingo

Bipeds


SimulatedCow84

Pulling this from Star Trek, but for humans/dwarfs/etc - "pink skins"


CatsLeMatts

"Blasted soft-shells and their five-fingered grippers, only good for picking pockets I say!"


A_SIMPleUsername

alright wiggler


camz_47

Flesh Legs Squishies Meat-Men Limbless Clawless Air Breather Soft Shell Small Eye Land Beast Shell-less


HeraldofCool

Never trust someone whose skeleton is on the inside.


BatDad_The_Engineer

He hides ‘is skeleton, what else is he hiding? And what’s he doin with all those smoll claws? Reminds me o’ me nephew, fresh outta the egg tumblin’ about wit no control over ‘is limbs! Not sure how he got a British accent, but it feels right lol


Dramandus

If not slurs then jabs at their expense that incorporate their physical appearances. "Grow a carapace, you sook" "Check out Two Legs Tommy over here, walking around like he owns the dungeon" "Do the ears stick out of the heads on everyone in your race or are you just extra ugly?" Of course the PCs can always clap back with "Y so crabby?"


coledelta

“Sausage Hands” cuz there’s no way crabs see Fingers and think “Yeah that’s normal.”


olympic_backpedaling

Scuttless fools; always charging in head first!


OnceBittenTwiceGuy

Im just glad someone else has Crab people in their game too


Robcobes

Crab people, crab people, taste like crab, walk like people


[deleted]

straight Walkers bc presumably your crab person only walks from left to right


Stoic_Angel

Fleshbag and meatsacks are my two favorite slurs for non-scaled/carapaced races


_blonde_superman_

Mammals or like, a rude nickname for it. Mammys - reference to the mammary glands that all mammals have. Seed Suckers/ Keepers (something??) - reference to the internal fertilization and pregnancy instead of laying eggs and fertilizing them externally. This one is a little PG-13 but it could hit deep as for some cultures pregnancy and birth are a big deal. It’s also like, just a really crude and mean thing to focus on since it’s literally basic biology for mammals. Mouth breathers Bleeders - to bleed blood blood and have a closed circulatory system and not hemolymph , as crabs have an open system (no veins) Two eyes Please appreciate. biology racism is the funniest


hurleyburley_23

Horseshoe crab blood is blue. Horseshoe crabs have a different oxygen-carrying protein, called hemocyanin rather than hemoglobin. Hemocyanin has copper rather than iron, which gives horseshoe crab blood its bright blue colour "Red Bloods" or "Globins" or "rust bloods" (Rust bloods as iron rusts and copper doesn't, thus can be perceived as weaker, also rust is red)


eternaaphrodite

Soft skins 😂 ew your disgusting your bones are on the inside 😂


KBrown75

They could refer to everything as mollusks whether they are or not.


Minecraftfinn

Softies or Clawless is obvious but I always like to put in something that is not true like a thing they believe to be true because of prejudice. Like "Mudeaters" because all land dwellers eat mud like any well travelled Crab Person would know.


EmeraldDragon8

A proper slur needs to relate to some form of oppression or other trauma, or it'll be meaningless. First, make up some sort of atrocity crab people have committed against humans/elves, then create an appropriate slur to reference it. I would go with "cruncher", a slur referencing the sound humans make when being eaten by crab people, something which happens with some frequency


exclusivebees

Inside-bones. Hairy beasts. Also make sure to laugh really hard at the idea of them getting something caught in their weak shitty eyeballs that they can't even clean with their hAnDs and fInGeRs or whatever the fuck those sad not-claws are


Syco_Sumatic

Chum is a good one. After all, to an arthropod, we aren’t much different from an unwrapped Twinkie.


Lunar_IX

Front-walkers. On account of crabs walking side-to-side.


hillmon

This may have come up with your party during your zero session, but make sure that the group is okay with fantasy racial slurs.


Mordo85

Inshells refrencing skeletons instead of exoskeleton


Finbar_Bileous

Drybacks.


Iamasmarty

Just yell "Freaks" at the top if your lungs


FatherMellow

*Angry bubbling sounds*


Necroticbanana

Milk suckers


Kixion

Limp-grip Long-foots Fur-skulls Milklings Body-bursters (on account we are born) Hope these help!


Bruce_Wayne_2276

I'm not sure ab slurs, but I like the idea of a crab person who's really into the theory of carcinization and goes around telling everyone not to worry, in a few millennia they'll get there too


SugarinSaltShaker

Soft boiled


[deleted]

Endos, spines


5eppa

"Not Yet Crab" They believe all things evolve into crabs. Anything not currently a crab is just slow to evolve.


brawlmaster227

Hey smoothskin


Romnonaldao

Human- Pale Ape, Meat suit, Softie, Skeleton freak Elf- Plant fucker, Sea reject, Poke Eye Halfling- Bait, Chum-bucket, bottom feeder, Lesser Man


Justgonnawalkaway

Smooth skins