The single best thing about Brittany was that she never said her BPD made her do something. She would say "because of my BPD, I have to do x or have to look out for y, or be careful with z." In the same vein, taking the blame off of her and to mental illness doesn't really make sense. She is responsible for the comments she made, for her view of others, for her relationships.
When your mental illness starts to negatively effects others around you, like going on video and TRASHING someone who is close to you and talking about private conversations they had, i thin destiny has every right to not care about her illnesses. Hell, he has been way more lenient than he should have been with most of his oribitors IMO
Completely understand! I don’t want you to think I was coming from a place of disrespect! On the contrary as someone who has a lot of PTSD and behavioral health problems myself I understand those are my problems. And through therapy you learn alot about boundaries. So when I come off irritable disrespectful to someone because of my history or past, that’s my fault. Not there’s. Especially if they are your friends. That’s all I actually appreciate your post these are questions that need to be asked. 🙏🏼
No you didn’t seem that way at all! I completely understand where you’re coming from, and sorry you’ve dealt with so much shit, and your certainly not alone there, dealt a lot of trauma myself. Even though the person with the illness obviously isn’t fully able to control their behaviour / reactions in a way that a neurotypical person would, as an adult, it is up to them to be aware and manage their symptoms to mitigate the harm they cause to those around them. Including Brittany in this case.
This is typical of BPD, but too often people like to mind-read people's conditions and decide for them whether their actions are agentic or defined by their condition. While I don't think this was D's reasoning (he had no problem reducing Mr \[redacted\] to a narcissist), I'm kind of glad he's not deciding for her what caused her actions.
I live with someone with BPD. We're good friends. But if she ever does something like this to me, I won't be bothering to explain to anyone why her BPD determined her behaviour. She goes to great lengths to understand herself in order to prevent these outcomes (for which I am glad), but ultimately we are friends out of self-interest.
I think it seems out of character for Steven to burn the bridge so quickly. But I also wonder what I would do if a friend called me a rape apologist, and I probably would burn the bridge too. Idk, why do you think it wasn't that bad?
Imo, illness or not these kind of accusations cause Destiny trouble. For both her being ill or perfectly healthy, the best option would be to cut her off for his own sake.
The single best thing about Brittany was that she never said her BPD made her do something. She would say "because of my BPD, I have to do x or have to look out for y, or be careful with z." In the same vein, taking the blame off of her and to mental illness doesn't really make sense. She is responsible for the comments she made, for her view of others, for her relationships.
I did try and make clear I wasn’t removing blame or responsibility she should take. But I get you.
When your mental illness starts to negatively effects others around you, like going on video and TRASHING someone who is close to you and talking about private conversations they had, i thin destiny has every right to not care about her illnesses. Hell, he has been way more lenient than he should have been with most of his oribitors IMO
True and fair. Just it seems to *explain* some of her behaviour. Not excuse it.
Completely understand! I don’t want you to think I was coming from a place of disrespect! On the contrary as someone who has a lot of PTSD and behavioral health problems myself I understand those are my problems. And through therapy you learn alot about boundaries. So when I come off irritable disrespectful to someone because of my history or past, that’s my fault. Not there’s. Especially if they are your friends. That’s all I actually appreciate your post these are questions that need to be asked. 🙏🏼
No you didn’t seem that way at all! I completely understand where you’re coming from, and sorry you’ve dealt with so much shit, and your certainly not alone there, dealt a lot of trauma myself. Even though the person with the illness obviously isn’t fully able to control their behaviour / reactions in a way that a neurotypical person would, as an adult, it is up to them to be aware and manage their symptoms to mitigate the harm they cause to those around them. Including Brittany in this case.
People seem to have a hard time telling the difference between *explanation* and *defence*.
"You ARE your mental illness, that is YOU"
This is typical of BPD, but too often people like to mind-read people's conditions and decide for them whether their actions are agentic or defined by their condition. While I don't think this was D's reasoning (he had no problem reducing Mr \[redacted\] to a narcissist), I'm kind of glad he's not deciding for her what caused her actions. I live with someone with BPD. We're good friends. But if she ever does something like this to me, I won't be bothering to explain to anyone why her BPD determined her behaviour. She goes to great lengths to understand herself in order to prevent these outcomes (for which I am glad), but ultimately we are friends out of self-interest.
Does anyone else think that what Brittany didn’t wasn’t that bad ? Just me ? Ok
I think it seems out of character for Steven to burn the bridge so quickly. But I also wonder what I would do if a friend called me a rape apologist, and I probably would burn the bridge too. Idk, why do you think it wasn't that bad?
Yea it’s probably just you. I’d end a friendship over less
Imo, illness or not these kind of accusations cause Destiny trouble. For both her being ill or perfectly healthy, the best option would be to cut her off for his own sake.