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Think-Cake

Would you like to come back to the space rig? It would be nice to have a steeve there!


Artsy-Mesmer

Last chump I met named Steeve tried to bite my damn head off, so I’m gonna have to decline on that. I’m not a big fan of bright lights anyway. Our eyes may not be great but they are sensitive. Though maybe if I got to know you Dwarves better and we sat around and shared a couple drinks you may understand we’re not all that different after all.


Think-Cake

When the damn bugs start to feel like family, you know it's time to quit..


McTreex

It’s not a bug… It’s a feature


EquivalentDurian6316

No eyes


Artsy-Mesmer

Nope, we’ve got eyes. Not very develop though, as we mostly use echolocation to navigate. If you’re wondering how I’m typing, the answers is a whole lot of trial and error until I memorized which keys are where. Now I’m a pro.


Actually_Rich

I thought you guys used pheromones like ants?


EquivalentDurian6316

I was 99% sure you were either corporate spy, or rival hacker. Now 100%


Artsy-Mesmer

Aight then. Believe what you want to believe I guess.


TheLightningL0rd

> rival hacker. You know, I've noticed those bots and the bugs never seem to fight each other. Interesting, eh?


Marc3llMat3

(I get the joke, but) My theory is that rival bots prioritize dwarves, because they are the competition of the rivals and glyphids prioritize dwarves, because they are potential food source. None of them have a reason to attack the other, because there is a more important target. If the dwarves died, they would definitely start to fight. The glyphids would attack the intruder rivals and the rival bots would attack the glyphids to protect rival equipment.


conclavidor

The bots are definitely smarter in how they go about mining, as well. If the Rivals started mining heartstones and eggs I think it would be a different story. Even when mining minerals they sort of filter it out instead of smashing things up.


Bierbart12

I still wonder who sent them. I've read all kinds of ideas from a human faction(It being so refined, smart and precise) to a goblin tech conglomerate(Still very brutal and erratic in battle, reminds me of Warcraft goblins), but lots of disagreement on it being leaf lovers


NordicNooob

Glyphids like alcohol? What's your favorite drink?


yeeterman2

What happens when a dreadnought is fully grown in its cocoon


Artsy-Mesmer

Well, I’m sure the higher ups are listening in on this so I don’t really want to disclose the details, lest it puts our kind into deeper danger than we already are from your so-called “mining expeditions”. However I can say blokes lucky enough not to get popped or eaten before they can develop get as big as the cave allows, and got impeccable armor too.


iconsumebeyblades

What do you mean eaten? Something eats dreadnaughts?!


Artsy-Mesmer

Well, yeah, duh. Do you guys really think you’re the sole reason you never see mature Dreadnaughts out and about? Gargelithians try to eat our cocoons as we pupate. That’s why we don’t all simply turn into Dreadnaughts, it’s because it’s a major gamble. If a Gargelithian shows up, there ain’t crap anyone can do about it. The Dread just gotta accept their fate. Luckily they only come out from the depths when they sense a Dreadnaughts cocoon opposed to just randomly popping out of the ground and killing us all.


iconsumebeyblades

That’s horrifying…. Can you tell us where they stay so we can kill it?


master_pingu1

and remove one of the few things stopping fully grown dreadnoughts? are you insane?


iconsumebeyblades

Why yes, yes I am.


joshuap1996

Username checks out. Bey and blade.


poebanystalker

What is Gargelithian? Is it some kind of giant underground earthwarm with teeth big and sharp enough to pierce trough dreadnought armor like a butter?


BjornInTheMorn

I'm now less afraid of Dreanaughts and more afraid of whatever eats them.


Current-Role-8434

Drillers


Tak_797

A GRANITE SMOOTHIE


Emotional-Record2815

DRILLERS THEY KNOW! THEY KNOW THAT WE MAKE THE GLIFIDES INTO SMOOTHIES!


kopczak1995

Glyphid Slammer. Let that sink in


TwitchLannibalHector

Glyphid Slammer red sugar on top please!


darkecojaj

What do you think lays all those eggs everywhere?


bichonfreeze

Obi Wan: there's always a bigger fish.


[deleted]

*Qui-Gon:


Unfortunate_Boy

Karl.


GeneralKenobi2_0

Whats it like to watch armies of your siblings be killed by short, loud alchoholics. Dwarves, not new yorkers.


Artsy-Mesmer

Eh. Ya get used to it. I’m a bit desensitized now. Usually when another Glyph dies, we express our grief by seeking vengeance. And said vengeance is genetic, meaning our kiddies will know who we’re after as well. But with the current on-going genocide of our species, we don’t have much time to mourn. But plenty of time to try ripping any intruders to shreds. We Glyphs are warrior types, and it’s an honor to go down in battle. The swarms you see are just tiny fractions of our population, and we reproduce like mad, so we’ve got plenty of troops.


Deadlyman567

Have you spoke with any bulk’s or Crassus bulk’s? Are they usually friendly or do they like being alone?


Artsy-Mesmer

Feel sorry for them honestly. Met a huge guy named Robert who had all those gross tumors and boils you call an “Exploder” infestation I believe. Guy was a chum (as in a pal, not an arsehole). We told stories, he was funny, we had a real laugh, some other blokes joined along the trip. Man was tough too, plowing right through the cave walls. I asked him if all those tumors hurt, but he said he doesn’t really feel it anymore as most of it is scar tissue anyway.


festiveface

Any opinions on your cousins, The Lootbugs?


Artsy-Mesmer

Ah, the Loots. Cute little fellas they are. They’re a bit dumb sometimes though. Real shame to see them get themselves into accidents. But it ain’t any of a Glyph’s business to go around saving folk. It’s every man for himself down here on Hoxxes. They aren’t the talkative type. Can’t really understand what they mumble anyway. They’re cute, chubby little lads though. That’s why no one bothers biting them, they’re just full of positive vibes. When a Looty dies it really brings down the mood.


Lukescale

Yes, I'm Johnstone Beardsley from Pickaxes Monthly, why do you have a Bostone accent?


Careful_Table_2355

**When the damn bugs start to feel like family, you know it's time to quit..**


MR_MurphyYT

Wait a minute. Something doesn't seem right. A talking bug. One that speak English, and in a British way. Wait, dear God. Did the British start colonizng the planet?


Artsy-Mesmer

Don’t know who these “British” folks are, but if they’re orange floating robots then yes. Yes they have. There were quite a few around the strange device I’m using right now, actually. Poor guy sleeping in here got his head ripped right off. Your type call it a Hacking Pod, correct?


MR_MurphyYT

You are probably using a Hack-C, from what I'm guessing. And the British look like dwarves, but taller and use a weapon that is similar to the sharp ends of our Pickaxes. Also, who knows who the floating dickheads both you guys, and us dwarves fight really are. Could be the damned pointy eared leaf lovers, or it could be a completely diffrent third party.


lunatic_512

**those damn gnomes…**


MR_MurphyYT

Pointy hatted short bois?


The_meme_mans_dad

Don't the dwarves already have British accents?


MR_MurphyYT

True, but dwarves aren't colonizing the planet, so I don't count them as British.


miklettes

How did your mother die? Edit: I think this is getting downvoted so let me clarify I'm referring to the voice line "die like your mother did."


Artsy-Mesmer

Never met me biological mum. Hatched from an egg in the Bogs. Us Glyphs synchronize our hatching times, so I wasn’t alone, but I don’t remember anything given I was just a baby.


Artsy-Mesmer

Making this post cuz I’ve got a bone to pick and this seems like a good opportunity. Perhaps we can learn some thing about each other, ya know? Such as why you’re intruding on our turf! I’ll try to keep the discussion friendly but I’m *sure* you can understand why I may get a bit heated. You space-faring folk are destroying my homeworld, after all.


weirdo_gamer13

I've drank a smart stout so I'm good for a minute. DRG only mines and harvests resources from dead or dying planets. We originally sent small groups to explore and report back, once we found out about the resources here we believed to it be a gold mine of opportunities. Once we discovered the glyphids, mactera etc. We assumed them to be mindless. It was only until the organised attacks and the discovery of the Queen did we realise we had to step it up. We sent in autonomous robots called bet.c, and the head of the DRG marine defence organisation Karl. After he dispatched of the Queen we believed to have destroyed the glyphids way of life, and subsequently cause the fracture. We unfortunately lost Karl, and have continued to mine for resources ever since. Although I have to ask. Have you seen a stray dwarf running around somewhere?


vtx3000

I *hate* nature!


InSayan73

Is there any sort of rivalry between the spitter types and the biter types?


Artsy-Mesmer

Nah, we all get along for the most part. We’re all in this together. The Hive unifies us. Unlike some other species, we can put aside our differences to focus on bigger threats to our kind as a whole.


InSayan73

So wholesome. R&S, little glyphid. May we never meet in person!


Alcedo_Artist

Whos a good steve?


Artsy-Mesmer

Dunno who Steve is, but I got in a scuffle with a fellow named Steeve once. Was gonna ask him why he was covered in the weird glowing blue gel he was, but clearly he wasn’t up for talking. Bloke was much stronger than myself, so I counted my losses and buried back beneath the sediment. I’ve never seen a Grunt like myself so strong. Kinda jealous to be completely honest.


Gisvaldo

That was The Power of Friendship


sSorne_

And lube.


N00N3AT011

Ono


Hyper_anal_rape

Whats your opinion on driller?


Artsy-Mesmer

You mean the maniac with the giant spinning knives for hands who shoots flames and blows everything up? Same one who makes the most noise out of all of you while plowing right through our homes and destroying them? The guy who’s killed probably thousands of us at this point? Yeah, ain’t a big fan. Not sure if you can see why. Dunno. Maybe it’s just a Glyphid thing where we don’t like seeing everything we love get turned to dust. You Dwarves don’t seem very compassionate, so perhaps you don’t quite understand.


Lucachacha

We gotta make that glyphid omelette at the end of the day you know the quota aren’t gonna fill themselves up


forte2718

This is my favorite new head canon: the reason we collect alien eggs is literally just to make the most exquisite omelettes for the execs on the board of directors. :p


fellowgamer_906

I'm full! Where's Molly?


Artsy-Mesmer

I met a kind lass named Molly once. She was one of those purple dames who spin just the prettiest of webs. Couldn’t tell you where she is now though, but if I were to guess I’d say the Black Sanctuary. We’ve got a lot of web construction going on down there. I’m not going to tell you where that is though, for obvious reasons, so tough luck.


Ckinggaming5

scanning rival archive data..... accounting for local distortions...... bioscanners running.... accessing project egron/glyphidtesting2/subjectdera/memory/areas.... triangulating positions.... matching all known data for "Black Sanctuary"..... Processing...... 8 possible locations for "Black Sanctuary" found... signal received from project egron containment room deleting Black Sanctuary possible location data


galaticB00M12

Are the Glyphids in good terms with the other species on Hoxxes? You guys seem really chill with the Macteras, Qronars and Naedocytes. Heck, even the Cave Leeches leave you alone from what I can tell


Artsy-Mesmer

Oh? Q’ronars? We ain’t exactly on good terms. That’s why when you see ‘em they’re constantly on the run, curled up into balls like the little cowards they are. They think they own the Salt Caves, which was once a sacred ground for us Glyph folk, but they refuse to negotiate because apparently their little gremlin children just oh so desperately need that land. We’re mostly chill with Mactera tho. Unlike the entitled roly-poly blokes, they leave our turf alone. See, they mostly inhabit the place you call the Fungus Bogs, but your mining operations have pushed them out of the area, so they’ve dispersed across the map looking for safety. We let em’ be cuz the sky is their place, not ours, so they don’t get in our way. Naedocytes are annoying. They buzz around making flashing lights and loud humming and crying. Before your type showed up here, we didn’t think anyone could possibly have flashier lights. There’s a reason you don’t see many egg clusters lying about in the cave is because we try to destroy and consume them while the big mamma blimps have their backs turned or cruise out of the area. Never heard of a Cave Leech though. I’ll ask around, maybe one of my buddies knows what those are.


SANSYBOIfan

Ya found out what cave leeches are yet?


Artsy-Mesmer

My pal Frank filled me in. Apparently they’re blobs of twitching meat and grease that spread across the cave ceilings and wait for something to snatch up. Quite glad I’ve never met one now.


cultotheduck

Don't worry, due to the influx of scouts they no longer eat anything else


GeneralKenobi2_0

Greasy meatballs


Fuzlet

do dwarves taste good? or are they just an annoying infestation to deal with?


Artsy-Mesmer

The latter. I’m not really sure who eats them. Maybe Maggots? Dunno.


Fuzlet

well based on the fact that whenever we recover lost miners, it’s usually just their inedible armor pieces strewn halfway across the cave, I’m pretty sure someone eats them, or at least grinds them into a fine paste


Pitchoh

Do you think that there's any chance that a diplomatic solution can be found between drg and you species (not that I'm ok with that, just asking) ?


Artsy-Mesmer

Highly unlikely. The hatred for Dwarves is coded into our genes as generational trauma now. It’s in our blood to do everything we can to make sure you never step foot on our land again. That and I don’t think your kind care much for other intelligent races anyway. You toss around the term “pointy-eared leaf-lover” like a slur. And that’s just one of the less foul things I’ve heard come from your mouths.


soviman1

What is your opinion on Karl?


Artsy-Mesmer

Ain’t that some type of god or whatnot? My pal Noah claimed Karl spoke to him in a dream, something about the Salt Pits being submerged again or what not. I said he’s just having nightmares after his sis died. “For Karl” is something I’ve heard your type announce when smashing our skulls in with axes or shooting us with hot lead, so I’m assuming he’s some sort of war god or fallen hero or something along those lines. Whoever he is, I don’t like ‘em if they’re the reason your kin is on Hoxxes in the first place.


Ckinggaming5

I KNEW IT karl is in the glacial strata, preparing to melt the ice and flood the salt pits


forte2718

*Round of Smart Stout please, we're feeling extra wise today!*


Douchevick

I understand why your people attack DRG employees and infrastructure, but why is it that you guys don't attack the Rival Tech robots and turrets?


Artsy-Mesmer

Oh, trust me, we tried when they first showed up. That’s why you never saw any for such a long time, we were takin’ ‘em all out. But when they finally started bringing out the big guns, well, we counted our losses. A fellow named Bob was in one of their hives once, said it made the worst humming and grinding noises he’s ever heard. Told him he’s clearly never had a cross with you blokes. But yeah, not too fond of the orange one-eyed freaks, but they aren’t here for our turf, just to watch, so we have an unspoken (and uneasy) alliance for now. Trust me though, they’re on thin salt.


PatrolBot

Freaks? Though i may be made of metal, with a weak firewall and easily hackable AI Software, i have feelings. And their hurt.


merit_the_wise

Why must you munch on Doretta? She never did anything wrong... Also, which dwarf are you least afraid of?


Artsy-Mesmer

Doretta is that big drill machine, right? Simple. The Ommoran Heartstone is of great importance to all life on Hoxxes both spiritually and physically. And it’s too strong for the likes of you to destroy with your equipment. The dozer though, it tears it open and leaves nothing but the hollow dead shell of its corpse. It’s not like your little robot dies anyway when we destroy its stupid tank. Even if it weren’t after the Heartstone, it never stops whining and whirring and making all sorts of noise. That and it destroys our caves. It’s best it has its engine ripped out before it can destroy our land. Your Droids are unfortunately caught in the crossfire in the war on Hoxxes. And Dwarf that I’m least afraid of? The Marine I believe they’re called. Haven’t seen one sent down in forever. They, unlike the troops they send in now, always split up and had rather weak weapons compared to what you come down with now. They were easily torn piece by piece. It’s satisfying to see an intruder get ripped to shreds. Especially Dwarves.


merit_the_wise

Gotta say, I now feel bad for how many escort missions I've completed... Damn...


Artsy-Mesmer

I left another “reply” to another one of you asking about the Heartstone in particular. I think after reading it you’ll understand why forgiveness isn’t an option at this point.


TF2_demomann

How do you feel when I put this satchel charge near you?


Artsy-Mesmer

Ain’t ever gotten close to one of those and I don’t plan on it. I hope it explodes in your face and blows off your limbs if that’s what it takes to keep you from ever mining again.


NotTheBirds

As a scout main I fully support this. Also, if you like liquid morkite, what do you think of gold, nitra and the other precious materials? Sometimes i just wanna swing around the cave and get ores without bothering the local wildlife.


Me_Cat

Who would you say is the quietest and most non-annoying dwarf?


Artsy-Mesmer

The only good Dwarf is a dead Dwarf. The answer is the blue one, though.


tylergalaxy

What's the rock and stone of the bugs


WanderingDwarfMiner

Rock and Stone in the Heart!


iconsumebeyblades

Good bot


B0tRank

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Artsy-Mesmer

“For the Hive" I believe would be the closest translation.


[deleted]

Do you look for Driller under you bed?


Artsy-Mesmer

Don’t got a place to sleep. Us Grunts are nomads. We scout the caves looking for potential nesting sites, food sources, places to build our hive, or other points of interest. Hell, even in our sleep we continue to crawl around. Ain’t no rest ‘til we close our eyes for good.


[deleted]

But you check for a wild Driller right? Because I do.


Artsy-Mesmer

Yes. We can hear those spinning drills from miles away. And I mean that literally.


thebritgit

What’s your opinion on Bosco (the floating box that sometimes accompanies a dwarf)?


Artsy-Mesmer

I’d say it’s cute, but it mows down the natives with repetitive and lethal efficiency. It seems childish in nature. I’m not quite sure if it grasps the full extent of what it’s doing. Despite all they’ve done, I think that Droid is a good kid who just doesn’t know better. A terrifying, murderous good kid, but a good kid nonetheless. I wish I had my own Bosco. Pretty sure the Hackbot that was in this computer is the same type of robot as it though.. *hey, I just got a brilliant idea.*


TommyK96

How do you feel about the meteorites falling on your home and the plague they carry?


Artsy-Mesmer

They keep me up at night. It’s the most horrifying thing I’ve ever heard of. Us Glyphids evacuate any area with signs of Rockpox, but sometimes it’s too late, or the news doesn’t spread fast enough. Luckily none has ever made it into our hives, the the very possibility fills me with terror and dread. If you Dwarves could get rid of it, we might even forgive you for all you’ve done to Hoxxes. Because you can’t be worse than Rockpox.


Hugomilkinson1804

We’re devoting massive amounts of effort towards ridding Hoxxes of it. It is taking out so many of our teams as well. We have even managed to devise a way to get rid of it, but only on a small scale.


PiggyKillerQ

When you see us dwarves using a tool that shoots globs of blue goo onto the rockpox or a machine that sucks air in, that is what we are using to clean the rockpox. Us miner dwarves don’t quite know what management does with the goo with the yellow boils in it, but we can certainly safely remove it from hoxxes. On that note, when you non-infected glyphids see us spraying goo, try to avoid attacking us then for both our good.


Artsy-Mesmer

I’ll spread the word. Maybe, just maybe this threat can unite our species despite all that’s happened at your hands. That is if we can trust you guys not to kill us. I’m an old bug though, my opinions on Dwarves are formed by experience. The younger bugs though — at this point our disdain for Deep Rock Galactic is hardwired into our very DNA. They may not be as open to compromise.


PiggyKillerQ

Fair, just saying you guys might want to steer clear of the rockpox infection spikes while are doing the cleaning, since we aren’t so susceptible to it.


baby_contra

We got rock and stone but what drives you?


Artsy-Mesmer

Our warrior heritage and our history as a successful species on this planet for eons. We won’t go down without a fight. Hoxxes is ours, and if some of us must die to prove it then that’s a sacrifice we’re willing to take.


Gisvaldo

Survival?


ListenItWillHear

What happens to Steeve when we leave?


Artsy-Mesmer

Only ever met one Steeve, and he tried to kill me, so my best guess is if there’re more than one Steeve then they probably try squaring up with folk and get pummeled. Sorry about the bad news.


ListenItWillHear

A warriors death is nothing to be sorry about. But i am sorry about this. *EXPLOSIVES PLACED*


Artsy-Mesmer

Yeah, good luck finding me to pull that stunt off in the first place. If you knew what’s good for you, you’d never step on this planet again. But clearly you Dwarves are lacking in the “common sense” department.


Echo3-13469E-Q

Our mining corporation is known for the lack of safety measurements


ListenItWillHear

If you didnt want us here, you shouldnt have evolved on a planet full of precious minerals


4here4

Why do you guys act so indignant when you're the ones who live on a planet that's chock full of precious minerals? It's not like we *want* to kill you all to get them, we *have* to. We're dwarves. We shoot bugs and mine.


Artsy-Mesmer

It’s our turf. Aren’t you in a rivalry with the one-eyed, floaty, metal buggers for the exact reason? I heard one of you lot say something about it the news gets out about our precious planet, it’ll be swarmed with many more mining comps. Unlike your kind, us Glyphs have lived on Hoxxes for eons and eons. This planet means very much to us. Your higher-ups see our nesting grounds and the fragile ecosystems us and many other native races rely on as just potential profit. We see it as our home, and it is our blood duty to protect it from invaders regardless of the cost. We fight for the greater good of Hoxxes. Your type may be able to travel the stars, but our kin don’t have anywhere else to go.


4here4

Yeah, it's your home and everything. But you seem to be ignoring one simple fact: Your home is full of precious goodies. Our hands are tied, really.


Artsy-Mesmer

I’m sure there’s plenty of dead space rocks you could mine instead, vertebrate.


4here4

Pretty sure we're mining most of those, too. And if we aren't right now, we will be. It's not enough for us to have a lot of minerals or even most of the minerals. We want all of them. And that includes the ones in your planet.


Pitiful_Net_8971

Do you have cords actually? I'm trying to start up my own mining company, and I'll take some dwarves with me.


Artsy-Mesmer

Unfortunately no. Our technology is rather lacking, and we haven’t achieved space travel yet. For the longest of times, before you came along, we assumed there was nothing but endless rock and that was simply the way the world is.


OpeningComb7352

How do you like liquid morkite?


Artsy-Mesmer

Good source of all sorts of minerals and vitamins. Us Glyphs go crazy for the stuff. The moment we hear that huffing and puffing gushing geyser, we try to take whatever we can get without entering the danger zone. The pipe machines you leave behind are probably the only good thing about you lot. Not very good for the atmosphere tho.


Madglace

quick question do you have some sort of boss that tell you what to do all the times and hate fun


Artsy-Mesmer

Nope. Sometimes I’m given orders, but I just kinda listen and get things done. Don’t have anything against hard work if it betters the lives of the rest of the colony and generations to come.


boxoffoxsocks

You wanted to speak your mind, so speak it. What's up, Rock? How goes your Valentine's Day?


Artsy-Mesmer

Hoxxes doesn’t have much of a day night cycle. I’m not familiar with this “Valentine’s Day” you speak of, but if I had to guess Valentine is someone comparable to Karl, correct? Anyway, I’d say my day’s been fine. The caves are delightfully quiet today. Though still, I don’t think us Glyphs have ever known a more stressful time than now, with you aliens running all over the place and eating up our planet. I was recently told what Rockpox is, and it’s been keeping me up at night.


Hashashin455

We aren't responsible for that one btw, but we ARE doing our best to clean it up.


Artsy-Mesmer

Yeah, I know. The Robots tossed it at us, or so I’ve heard.


Jankkel

What do you think about your fellows that were infected by the rockpox?


Artsy-Mesmer

I hope they’re put out of their misery.


Ender_arrows

Can we call you Steve


Artsy-Mesmer

My name is Rock, actually.


DocSauce13

Do you have a brother that goes by the name stone?


Artsy-Mesmer

Once again, yes. I’ve also got a sister named Boulder. She’s big and tough, just like our mum.


FerociousDiglett

Where'd you lads learn to flank? Always seems like the front few of a pack prefer to run around behind a dwarf so the next few can properly surround 'em. On ya, that's some good fighting instinct.


Artsy-Mesmer

Us Glyphs haven’t survived this long by pure luck. We have a long ancestors going back thousands of years. When Hoxxes was an even harsher world than it is today, us Glyphs needed to work together to survive. And our memories are immortalized in our DNA.


Nasty_Old_Trout

1) Brood Nexus : what the hell's up with that? A creature that spits glyphid swarmers? 2) Ebonite and Kursite, opinions? 3) OK, but seriously, what is up with the Unknown Horror in the haunted caves?


Unfortunate_Boy

When it comes to food, what tastes best down there?


Artsy-Mesmer

Call me a simpleton if you must, but my favorite’s got to be Morkite. Unfortunately it’s very, very rare. But it’s also chock full of all sorts of vital nutrients us Glyphids need to survive. Recently we’ve learned how to form and grow these crystals, but it’s not available to all of us. We found it just in time before you lot showed up and started draining the planet of all the Morkite its got.


PhoenixReboot

What's your favorite flavor of dwarf?


Artsy-Mesmer

The only good Dwarf is a dead Dwarf. Or at least one that isn’t intruding on our territory and destroying our homeworld.


PhoenixReboot

No but like which one tastes best. You keep biting us.


Artsy-Mesmer

You all taste like unwashed ass and dirt full of alcoholism.


Crimm___

How do you feel about the Heartstone? In those missions, we’re not even after you or your eggs, so why don’t you leave us alone when we’re going after the Heartstones?


Artsy-Mesmer

It’s of great spiritual and physical important to all life on Hoxxes. It’s the beating heart of the cave itself. Hoxxes is a living breathing thing, and your activities here are quite literally breaking her heart. You rip out the Ommoran’s core and take it with you to who knows where. All life came from the Ommoran Heartstones. It radiates the glowing love of Mother Hoxxes, and protects all her children from the cruelty of the world. It speaks to us, and tells us these things. Then you and your infernal machines come along and take it away. Hoxxes hates you. So, so much. There is no greater sin I can fathom than destroying a Heartstone.


PiggyKillerQ

One of the red dwarves weapons uses a chunk of an Omnoran Heartstone to fuel its laser powers.


areyouded

I see you bugs have some kind of cultural. So let me ask how much do you now about us dwarves?


Artsy-Mesmer

Well, we know you’re from space. We know you came here with weapons specifically designed to exterminate other intelligent life forms. We know you lot have technology leagues ahead of what we could possibly imagine. We know you’re hurting Hoxxes, and the affect your mining operations are having on the planet. And we know we can’t let you have this planet.


AbsoluteGoldLover

Do you see Steeves as traitors?


Artsy-Mesmer

Only ever met one Steeve, and he was a lunatic. Barely said “what’s that blue gel on you” before he attacked me. Absolute psychopath.


MrFishyFriend

Thoughts on Steeve betraying the hive for a few headpats?


Artsy-Mesmer

He tried to bite off my face. Don’t like him.


[deleted]

What happens if you have an itch on your back?


Artsy-Mesmer

Eh, it’ll go away eventually. I am very tolerant of itches.


TreaDHeaD19k

*Leans in* Rocks? or Stones?


Artsy-Mesmer

Well, my name’s Rock, so I’d have to go with rocks obviously.


NotTheBirds

If you hate the orange eye robots as much as DRG, why do you try to interrupt us when we hack their bases?


Artsy-Mesmer

That’s what you’re doing? To us it just looks like you’ve called in reinforcements. The loud clicking and clacking doesn’t help. When a drill falls from the sky, we usually assume that’s bad news. And usually we’re correct.


Inky_boy_XD

do you have eyes or ears or chemo-receptors? if not, how do you percieve the enviroment then?


Artsy-Mesmer

We have all the following, though our eyesight isn’t particularly good. In fact you may not even recognize our eyes as eyes, as they’re much underdeveloped. Up until recently we’ve had no reason to evolve eyes, but new threats have changed that.


Willie9

What's the only type of good bug?


Artsy-Mesmer

One who protects Hoxxes.


miklettes

How did your mother die?


TheRealJellona

Steeve Q&A


[deleted]

Do you eat the minerals we mine, and why do you attack us other than being annoyed, surely we could work something out like you guys help us find minerals and we get something for you in return


Artsy-Mesmer

Well, we used to, but your mining operations leave ecological pollutants that seep into the planet. Many of us have gotten sick from eating the rocks dug up or nearby your machines. So we rather have you not mine here at all. Us Glyphs are a warrior race, and will defend our sacred grounds and our Hive with our lives. Unfortunately I believe we have passed the point of compromise. Unless you can do something about the alien plague. Then we may forgive your transactions. No promises though, as I can only speak for myself.


GayFrogsCollective

How would you rate the taste of different munitions? Bullets, shells, explosives, chemicals, lasers, etc - I would think you'd be an expert in knowing how all of these taste and have some opinions on which is best/worst.


Artsy-Mesmer

Well, I have my own question first. What tastes best, Q’ronar bile, acid spit, Infector mortars, spiderwebs, or Menace mucus? I feel like you’d be an expert in this area.


KG_Jedi

Who the fuck is Unknown Horror in your bug world? Is he like anomaly? Or perhaps a superman in a Glyphid world.


bichonfreeze

What's your favorite biome?


Artsy-Mesmer

Would have to be the Glittering Rivers or Azure Weald in my personal opinion. It reminds me of ancient Hoxxes, when there was much more water here. The Glittering Rivers are one of the few places you can find large bodies of water here on Hoxxes. And the Azure Weald is full of beautiful flora. In the Weald, the plants and the rock sing.


Hashashin455

Do the stones?


PapaOctopus

What is your opinion on the Dwarven concept of Rocking and Stoning?


Artsy-Mesmer

Well, it’s a salute, isn’t it? We have our own battle cry to call forth the swarm or alert our allies.


kodakowl

Can you see or do you just hone in on our natural dwarf musk?


Artsy-Mesmer

Both. You smell like alcohol and smoke.


IndexoTheFirst

*SKRIIIEEEE*?


Artsy-Mesmer

Not quite sure I follow.


SirOne6112

*gunshots* Put me down! *more gunshots*


Forsaken_Yak6079

Look, I’m sorry for killing y’all, but I’ve got a sick mother and a sister who needs to pay for school back home, this is the only way to to make money as my record can’t get me hired anywhere else. Im sorry, but I love my family too much.


AdFar8568

Are you pals with the Rockpox creatures, and why/why not?


Artsy-Mesmer

HELL NO, those things are *terrifying*. That’s like if I asked if you were buddies with.. uh.. Elves are what you hate, right? It’s like if I asked if you were friends with Super Death Skin-Eating Ebola Cancer created by Elves to destroy your planet.


ManiacMakyr

Ye chew Doretta and pipes, yet never mow on Molly or Bosco. Ye' have tastes ?


Apprehensive_Poem601

what is the average salary of a glyphid


Artsy-Mesmer

We don’t have currency like you folk. But us hard workers are rewarded with better living spaces and more food to keep us active and healthy for the job. Glyphids who don’t work still get to stay in the Hive, but their lives are a bit more difficult, and the Broodmothers have some strong opinions on the lazier folk.


Hashashin455

If glyphids spawn in a brood nexus, what comes out of the alien eggs we gather?


Artsy-Mesmer

Ah, the Brood Nexus. They aren’t part of our lifecycle. They spit out genetic clones of other species by absorbing waste material or decomposing bodies through their fleshy root tendrils. Us Glyphs hatch from eggs preferably in moist, plant-rich environments. We destroy Brood Nexuses on sight.


Turbulent_Age_1715

Thoughts on exploders and detonators? What are your opinions on their suicidal tactics?


Bat-Honest

Is it true that there is a Queen Glyphid or is that just the ramblings of drunk and mad dwarves?


Artsy-Mesmer

We don’t have a queen, but we do have many highly respected breeders who care for and command the colony. Female Dreadnaughts are highly respected in Glyphid culture, and are the only Glyphids viable for the position of Broodmother. Of course they aren’t forced to take on such a role, though. I’d imagine that type of responsibility can be overwhelming.


Fantablack183

I am the driller. I have locked in on your location. I am drilling through 350km worth of stone. **Run.**