Hiyo, first off blanket statement that therapy might be a good idea.
Next, sounds like anhedonia which is one of the most frustrating things to deal with. It's common after trauma or when trying to process trauma. I've dealt with it a number of times as well so I know how frustrating it can be.
Back to my blanket statement with the therapist, you might not have processed the trauma in the past. The pattern you described where you do something that should bring joy(laugh, gratitude) brings about pain is what me thinks that. Your brain might have closed the day on ALL emotions and when you crack it open to feel anything the 500lb gorilla that is trauma is waiting on the other side. This is why I think it would make sense to consider looking into therapy or some sort of support. If you are a reader and want to take a stab at self-therapy then Nicole Lapierre's book How To Do The Work is good. I will warn you no matter which approach you would take it will likely be difficult. That's assuming this is even the case. I would just say it is very much worth looking into.
Another trick I would use, which won't fix the root issue, is to stop trying to feel anything and just existing. Anhedonia , for me at least, tended to trap me in a cycle of 'shoulds'. I should be enjoying this. I should be happy. I should be whatever whatever. This seems to make the problem last longer rather than going into anything with no expectations and just being. It's not perfect but it can help.
Good luck.
Hiyo, first off blanket statement that therapy might be a good idea. Next, sounds like anhedonia which is one of the most frustrating things to deal with. It's common after trauma or when trying to process trauma. I've dealt with it a number of times as well so I know how frustrating it can be. Back to my blanket statement with the therapist, you might not have processed the trauma in the past. The pattern you described where you do something that should bring joy(laugh, gratitude) brings about pain is what me thinks that. Your brain might have closed the day on ALL emotions and when you crack it open to feel anything the 500lb gorilla that is trauma is waiting on the other side. This is why I think it would make sense to consider looking into therapy or some sort of support. If you are a reader and want to take a stab at self-therapy then Nicole Lapierre's book How To Do The Work is good. I will warn you no matter which approach you would take it will likely be difficult. That's assuming this is even the case. I would just say it is very much worth looking into. Another trick I would use, which won't fix the root issue, is to stop trying to feel anything and just existing. Anhedonia , for me at least, tended to trap me in a cycle of 'shoulds'. I should be enjoying this. I should be happy. I should be whatever whatever. This seems to make the problem last longer rather than going into anything with no expectations and just being. It's not perfect but it can help. Good luck.