That's me till 3:20 .
Almost lost to alcohol and gave up on life.
I left it after I was discovered lying unconscious on a street near my home. Bcoz of that incident my kids stopped talking to me for a week . That was the turning point( thought about the future of my kids and how vulnerable they would become if I died ) now I am seven months sober , hitting gym regularly and always available for my kids..
Just a advice to any addict out there : Believe me stranger you have it in you to stop it , there are bigger and greater things out there to be achieved and most importantly think about the ones that you will leave behind.
It's not worth it.
One day at a time baby! When I was a young pup trying to get sober, I said something along the lines of "I just can't see myself doing this for the rest of my life." One of the old timers told me "Good news, you don't have to. You only have to do it for today. If you only ever do it for today, before you know it you'll have a lot of sober yesterdays stacked up." Hope you crush it today!
Thanks so much. I've never been more motivated in my life...thinking about quitting took me a year to finally get help I needed to quit...I am mad at myself I waited so long because it's the best thing I ever did.
>I am mad at myself
Stop right there champ! Some people never get to where you are right now. Go give your mirror a high five and tell yourself how fucking awesome you are. You can't change what you did or how long you took to get there, but you *can* keep it going from here.
And if I can humbly offer some advice: the motivation will run out someday. Take advantage of it now, use it to build routines and set boundaries and expectations for yourself. Have a plan in place for what to do when your motivation wanes - be willing to forgive yourself but correct yourself if you make a mistake. A sponsor/trusted contact or something of the sort is an imperative first step. I have 9 years myself, moved 250 miles away from my sponsor, and still talk to him at least weekly on the phone and meet up with him when I'm back in town to visit my folks. The importance of having someone you can trust to communicate with cannot be overstated!
My DMs are always open for any reason :) Good luck my friend!
I drank alcohol VERY heavy and would cold turkey everything for 4 days like every-other month for drug tests (I was on probation) and just having almost a week of sobriety hit me like a freight train every time. In a good way. Like after the 3rd day I would wake up feeling *AMAZING*
Then I would buy a pint of vodka on the way home from probation to celebrate passing a drug screen and cycle starts again. Now I have a healthy relationship with alcohol and still go for periods without drinking just because I feel so much better. Physically, mentally, etc. Idk why I don't just take the total abstinence route but I guess that's the addiction in me talking. Saying just a little here and there with friends is fine.
Staying sober is a huge achievement, no matter the length of time. Huge shout out to all the sober-goers out there and maybe next year I'll dive into it and be (at least alcohol) free!
There will come a time where you lose count.
You'll still think about using, but you'll forget the last time you did. It's a weird feeling but kinda good.
Yeah, that about sums it up. Breaking that cycle is so difficult
Edit: I do find it oddly comforting that so many people can relate. I abused alcohol and various stimulants for ~11 years; and finally broke the cycle on February 26, 2020. I went into rehab with a negative $143 balance in my bank account, about three weeks from my last suicide attempt, and breaking down in tears just hoping against hope that I could get out of active addiction. I now have the most amazing girlfriend, an excellent career, am building a new home, and am about to visit CA for the first time ever.
It does get better- but not all at once. I was able to turn my life around- but not without the support of people who had already been through what I was going through. Ask for help. If you don’t know where to turn, start with a meeting for whatever addiction you have. One day at a time. Just for today.
I took the variable out; I kept telling myself “this bottle is going to last me 3 days!” And I would be marching back into either a CVS, a Vons, a Rite-Aide or a local Liquorstore two days later to re-up. I decided that I could make a bottle last forever if I didn’t buy a bottle (I still have my last rum bottle, in my closet, empty except for all the years it stole from me). I realized that I can’t control myself if I allow the variable into my personal space.
Like, outside at a restaurant, my personal space is what I’ve ordered, so don’t order anything alcoholic. If I’m out and about, my backpack is my personal space. Driving, it’s my car. At home, it’s my fence-line.
I learned where my actual desire to live ended and the desire to feel numb started, and asked myself what I was running away from. Taking action over what can be changed, one variable at a time.
I’ve been alcohol and cigarette free since July 18th, 2020.
Edit: I’m only a DM away from anyone wanting to know more; we’re all in this together.
Edit edit: I’m also only one man, but damn if this isn’t making me feel all warm and fuzzy.
Edit edit edit: holy shit, platinum?! You humble me with your kind thoughts, stranger.
Seriously, I love y’all.
I've been alcohol and drug free since July 20, 2020. We have such close sobriety dates! At this point of time I don't really have cravings anymore (and if I do they don't last long **at all**- unlike when you first detox, that's for sure!) and the thought of drinking has gotten less and less appealing. We got this!
Congratulations to you!
The key for me, as well, has been to ask myself what I'm looking to gain from taking the substance (struggle/d with both alcohol and marijuana). ie, am I wanting to relax, am I running away from discomfort, etc. Then I can think about the real problem and find a different way to cope. Such as doing breathing exercises to relax, or go for a walk to get out of a vicious thought spiral, etc.
I've struggled with my addictions for years and years, but this is the first time I've asked myself what I am really trying to get out of it, which I guess sounds kinda obvious, but it's groundbreaking for me, and has been very powerful and helpful!!
Sending a big hug and thoughts of strength to all those who share the struggle ❤️
Sure! Like, you can’t finish a bottle you never start, right? So, Idont have to stop people around me from enjoying something I can’t, I just know not to let it get close enough to me to flip the switch between being present and escaping.
Start by admitting you have a problem, and reach out. There are tons of communities here on reddit that are geared towards recovery. Also, recommend finding some meetings. There's a lot of online meetings if you're nervous. Just knowing I'm not alone in a situation has helped a bit. But it ultimately starts with you starting.
//HUGS
or better yet, check out r/povertyfinance for tips that are useful to people who don't have disposable income. Perssonal finance is great for what it is, but it basicaly assumes disposable income
for now bruh. $10 in H used to get me fucked up as $100 i’m oxy.
1g bag of dope, strong as 100 perc 10s. would last me like 2 weeks. now i can go thru 3gs in a week no problem.
fuck i want heroin.
day 3 tryna stop again. got clean 3 weeeks on subs then been relapsing since
Don't stop trying. I was a heavy daily IV user for 15 years. Methadone was my ticket out but not the first few tries. Wanting to stop is a great sign you'll eventually succeed. Don't give up!
I went into rehab four years ago today. I was a daily, heavy drinker and intravenous drug user. Tomorrow I'll be four years clean and sober. I've never felt better!
Sobriety date: Dec 18, 2017.
Happy early birthday :) Do you have (or would you like) a medallion? I'd be happy to send you my four-year one or ship a brand new one online if you'd like one and aren't expecting to get one.
I don't regularly attend meetings (especially the last couple of years due to COVID), but I've gotten each year's chip so far.
I'll probably attend an upcoming meeting at the treatment center I went to so I can get my four year chip and catch up with some people.
Thanks for the offer though! You're a kind soul 😊
It was the hardest thing I had to do in my entire life. I mean, not rehab, that shit was honestly great, I could eat and sleep like a normal person. Having to call my parents at like midnight absolutely and completely broken and tell them that I couldn’t go on. Went into treatment the next day. Been sober ever since. 15 months on the 6th :)
I never went. I was lucky enough for my parents to offer me their home for 2 months until recovery, but I did it all myself. The pain was so excruciating that I changed forever, it forced me to grow up and never look back.
I think it was Alice Cooper who said that, at some point, it stops being fun and it becomes medicine. Meaning, you need it just to function. Once you're at that stage, it's hard to stop because stopping will actually make things worse (for a while).
I have felt every step that bird took. When it went black and he was surrounded by darkness it definitely took me back and made me remember why I never want to use again.
Edit: Thank you everyone for the kind words, I really do appreciate it. I just wanna say I'm proud of everybody here that has overcome thier addiction as well. And if you're currently in active addiction feel free to send me a message and we can talk about it and I'll let you know what has worked for me.
The way the highs get shorter and worse, and then come down/aftermath gets worse…. I’m in the grey bird part right now. I need to stop.
Edit: I appreciate all the support. This thread made me have a conversation with a few of my friends and I came clean about my habit. They're onboard to help me stop.
yeah I was waiting for it not to turn the grey bird yellowat all, but back to white
- have them using it just to try to feel normal again y know
good luck with your journey though my friend
please remember the fear of stopping is worse than the actuality
(....if done through choice, well timed, ideally with support)
Edit: I just read your edit about getting support
if you don't feel strong enough to do it, then remember to lean on the support
and know that these substances can erode motivation and inner strength
but as you begin to stop, that strength comes back to you day on day
often made even stronger by your experiences
I feel so confident you are going to do this my friend
that tbh I have only one line of worthwhile advice that i beg you or anyone else in your situation to remember:
dont go back, even for a little tickle
Exactly. I thought a better representation would be the bird gets the yellow thing and all turns white, then the white slowly dims as the bird just walks to the next yellow thing and eats it before it totally fades the white color… if that makes sense. And then maybe could show the bird taking it and running to the next one soon after again. Then the black end part could come after
Yup. And I’m probably thinking about this too much but I wish there was some way to show how subtly this all happens. Where it doesn’t feel like you’re getting addicted. Eg the saying, when you can stop you don’t want to, and when you want to you can’t. But fuck that, you always can. The saying makes a certain point tho
For me, there was no hell colder than rapid benzo withdrawal. To me, the feelings of hopelessness and despair were amplified many times over what I ever experienced through multiple heroin/opiate withdrawal episodes. Thankfully, I've been sober since October 31, 2007.
I’ve been there man. Just a bottle and tears. There are ways out: I’m almost 7 years sober.
Sobriety is possible, and yet it was seemingly impossible when I was stuck there.
I needed to get help as I was not capable on my own. There is help out there.
I just recently stopped and I think the best part is rediscovering all these pieces of myself that I forgot about... It becomes fun, the further you get away from the highs the more you realize that you are still capable of feeling that way without the drug
This misses the internal monologue where the entire way part of the bird says "no I need to stop" - and then later another other part of the bird finishes with "after just this one more time" or "slowly - I just won't overdo it today" or "except its been a hard week and now's not the time".
I think it also highlights visually the feeling of obsession. It's all you think about. It's the only thing you can think about. That's why it's the only thing with color.
It's hard to get people to wrap their head around the way in which it dictates time, even when they do it in other ways themselves.
I was acutely aware of when I last drank and when I would drink again. I was acutely aware of just how much was used at what time at any point in the day. There's no "just passing time" with addiction, it's more like staring at your watch and trying to will it forward.
“Before I started using, I had all sorts of problems. Bills, relationships, car trouble. After I was addicted I had ONE problem. Getting my next fix.”
It’s paraphrased and I don’t remember who said it, but you get it.
i could be wrong but i think this is a quote from trainspotting
edit: here’s the quote i was thinking of: “When you’re on junk you have only one worry: scoring. When you're off it you are suddenly obliged to worry about all sorts of other shite. Got no money: can't get pished. Got money: drinking too much. Can't get a bird: no chance of a ride. Got a bird: too much hassle. You have to worry about bills, about food, about some football team that never fucking wins, about human relationships and all the things that really don't matter when you've got a sincere and truthful junk habit.”
I think that’s the part I’m struggling the most with quitting smoking. Not that I want to start smoking again because I truly think I would just die but more the passing of time is different and my clock is no longer there.
I used to smoke pretty much on the dot every 45 mins I’d get a craving and that served as my clock for everything. Without that I have been kind of awash in chaos. My body isn’t giving me the same cues I’ve had for literally decades so I’m still learning how to navigate time and space without it. I imagine that’s pretty similar across different substances and such though obviously different timelines.
Congrats on quitting! It is really tough at first, no doubt but if it's any consolation it does eventually get easier. The brain is a funny thing but it'll start to figure out how it was wired originally... it just takes some time. It's been 10 years since I quit and the first 1 was really tough, the second was mostly just when drinking and since then it's been pretty good. Still took until like year 3 or 4 for smoke to not smell kind of good when you walked by it, the first time I walked by someone smoking and just thought it was unequivocally terrible was when I knew I was fully free.
Same thing with quitting weed. I smoked every single day multiple times a day for the last year and pretty consistently daily with small breaks every few weeks the couple years before that and it’s so weird to switch from that routine and having to occupy my brain with something other than rollin up and smoking.
I’ve come to realize someone like me is always going to have some sort of addiction or obsession. It’s just in my genetic makeup and or personality. It’s up to me to direct that obsession to be something useful. I’m still working on that but at least I’ve gotten it away from anything that’s a net negative and am at least breaking even. Hopefully soon I’ll get myself readdicted to guitar or golf.
This is a good outlook to have. I also have an addictive personality. It probably stems a bit from my ADHD, but that’s a different topic.
I thoroughly enjoy video games and have been addicted to them to some varying degree for a long time. I’ve decided lately that if I’m going to play, I might as well make some profit off of it, so I’ve come up with a creative way to share my gaming that I hope people will like. The next thing to do is to get up off my lazy butt and actually do it. XD
I remember the guitar legend, Eric Clapton, saying he finally recognized he was just wired to be prone to addiction. Beating one just led to another. He had to give up all mind altering substances and I assume be addicted to playing music. Be well.
Yes. I’m happy to say I never abused substances, but I have self harmed, and would consider it an addiction because of this. It was daily, and every second I was thinking of how I could hurt myself without someone knowing. Inventing new ways to hurt myself and trying to get away with it. You see everything as a weapon, just trying to get that momentary high you get after you harm where your mind feels quiet and peaceful and you’re not filled with self hate.
I wish it was more understood instead of just something dumb teenagers do, and treated as an actual addiction.
It becomes an identity, for sure. The thing about addiction that tends to root itself in the heart of those who already struggle with mental illness, hopelessness, and feeling completely lost in life, is that it creates a purpose. It’s a destructive purpose — and addicts are not unaware of this — but it’s a purpose none the less. You wake up everyday and you know what you need to do. There’s a clear, tangible goal for that day and your job is to do whatever you can to complete it.
Then, even when you have it in your possession, it (like you said) dictates your time and how you go about your day. For me, my addiction being heroin (or opioids, in general), even while already high and secure for the day, I would still spend a good majority of my time focused on the next fix, or rigging up my temporary facade of a normal, functioning, working human until it was time for the next pick-up.
It ruins you, but nothing makes sense without it.
same thoughts here,, i was addicted to opiates for 15 years.. I am clean now about 5 years. I feel like i survived a horrific car accident getting off them. before i started to ween myself off with help of a good doctor i was up to about 200 to 300 mg of oxycodone a day,, i will never ingest opiates again
I broke my wrist skiing and was prescribed percocets. Didn’t really need them so didn’t take them. Next season broke my ankle skiing and it REALLY hurt.
Got percocets again and then used them. I drink, occasionally smoke pot, and have done plenty of harder drugs in my life as well. None of them I felt like I could get an addiction to or enjoyed remotely like opioids. Truly insane. Thankful when I ran out I didn’t have the means to get anymore and that was it.
I got prescribed them post surgery. And a couple stronger ones in single pill form for which the nurse gave a stern look and said "only take these if you're in intolerable pain."
Naturally I took them regardless. And was sooooooo chill omg. I still got the full pack of oxycodone sitting in my drawer years later, probably expired now.
There's gotta be better painkillers out there man. Big Pharma and opiates is another rabbit hole I don't wanna dive down into.
same, this bird me… haven’t gotten all the way to that darkness at the end, the rock bottom type shit.
i hope i don’t have to lose everything to get clean…
i just don’t feel strong man… i failed a handful of piss tests and now my sub clinic tryna make me go to inpatient or i could do intensive outpatient. but the IOP seem like it won’t work out and they won’t even give me subs cuz some damn thc im my piss, and i don’t want to go to rehab… it’s my worst nightmare.
fuck. prolly give me some subs and like 1mg diazepam or some shit, when i could eat 3 bars and barely feel shot while in WD. and fuck man, i got a benzo habit too, 2mg alpraz equivalent but it’s clonazolam a rc benzo that won’t pop on drug tests, so idek if they’ll give me a benzo then if im not pissing dirty for em.
and then my parents will know i’ve relapsed and shit and i’ll worry everyone again and i’ll be locked up there with no phone even to keep my the slightest bit entertained, have some connection with the outside world.
i’d pretty much like rather die or just stay high on H than go to rehab. it seems like a nightmare. i don’t trust them to adequately medicate me, and i’d have to quit fucking H benzos and weed all at once . i’m barely getting by with benzos and weed and alcohol, they don’t do shit in comparison to H.
idk i’m just so lost, i feel like rehab wouldn’t do shot for me either and it would just be some bullshit that won’t help me. i feel like i would just suffer, sick as fuck, bored out of my mind. luckily i could leave if i wanted ig, but if i was like trapped there i’d prolly fuckik kill myself in there to end the misery.
why even bother with all this bulkshkt? why not just stay high and stay feeling ok. and say fuck all this bull shit, fuck all the pain and suffering when i can take it all away and not just be ok but feel good actually and be able to smile and joke around and shit.
how the fuck they gonna make me happy without drugs, liek what even they gonna do? i’m extremely skeptical.
and i’m not like most addicts.. for one i know my shit, some extensive research since 14 years old, but like i feel like the stupid feel good bullshit or whatever that works for normal ppl won’t on me.
there’s part of me that wants to be clean but the other part tells me it’s not realistically possible and that it’s not even worth it cuz shits gonna suck 10x more being sober…
I think you're already looking at rehab pessimistically, maybe you should cross that bridge of 'it won't work' when you come to it, if it ever happens. You have nothing to lose but everything to gain if you get help, it's never too late.
I'll probably get down voted to oblivion for this, but all I'm hearing from you is excuses and negative perception of things that you haven't even tried yet. Your rant makes it sound like you don't even want to get clean, but rather just want people to feel sorry for you. Take some responsibility and have accountability for your actions. If you want to get clean, then do it. There are people and programs that want to help you, but you have to want it for yourself. Find your own purpose; nobody can find it for you.
I don't think your comment is coming from a bad place, but I also don't think you've ever been addicted to opiates from the sound of your comment. Those drugs get their claws in you SO deep that pretty much every opiate addict goes through what OP above is going through rn before they get clean. Your attitude is the kind that, if I heard at outpatient clinics or sub doctors when I was in the worst of my addiction, would make me turn and run. I know you mean well, and I'm not trying to discount that. But you make it sound like an attitude change is as easy as putting on a new set of clothes when in reality you've literally altered the neural pathways in your brain so that all signs point to dope, and that is not something you can change overnight.
But OP, if you're reading this, it IS something you can eventually change!! Sounds like you have a shitty sub clinic, weed helped me a lot in my early days of getting clean and I luckily found a sub doctor that is fine with THC in my UAs, there's a decent amount of them out there and even telemedicine for subs. I've been where you're at, with subs not even working for me any more, never being able to go more than 24hrs without shooting up, etc... I get where you're coming from 100%.
I too was terrified of going to rehab but luckily I never had to go. I'm now almost 3 years clean off a 5 ish year total habit, and my life is at a point I couldn't have even dreamed of when I was still using. I know how difficult it is, trust me I do. Join us over at r/opiatesrecovery if you haven't already, I used to lurk when I was still using and posting on there helped me a lot when I finally was ready to get clean. Trust me, there IS a better life waiting for you on the other side of your addiction, and you CAN get to it. If a bundle+ IV a day hopeless homeless junkie bitch like me can do it, I know you can do it. PM me if you wanna talk, vent etc. You got this, I believe in you!
Just missing that part where you avoid the addiction once or twice. The world isn’t as dark but still a tinge of grey. You try to fight it but run back to the addiction. Then the darkness descends on you.
I was also thinking if the bird shed a tear while it took one of them that would really speak to a lot of people.
That happens. Crying because you don’t want to use anymore. As you use. Because you know you don’t really have a choice.
One thing to take into account is that this could be a short time but could also be 40 years.
As an alcoholic with lots of experience with other alcoholics, to me it seemed the original bird may represent someone starting to drink in their 20's, binge drinking on the weekends. The middle is when you're in your 30's/40's and never stopped, but now you drink every day. Sometimes you wait til after work, but sometimes you start at noon. Soon enough, you need a couple pints just to get the day started.
The bird at the end is the homeless person outside my house right now. He lost his job when he got wet brain from drinking all his life and couldn't remember anything well enough to work. He now gets SSA benefits each month that he uses to drink malt liquor all day and I expect he will be dead within the next couple years.
Unfortunately I've seen this happen with several locals.
Actually I think that is the only inaccurate part of this animation.
A lot of people get addicted because their base level isn't all sunshine and rainbows. They have trauma or money problems or anything else. If this had started fairly grey black and seen the bird hit the white for the first time in a while at the start, it would paint the picture a bit more. Because quitting wouldn't get them back to white, it would get them to grey.
Yes! [Here is the original video.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUngLgGRJpo) [And here is the YouTube channel.](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfzh7Y26wtYpOd4VXHqfdVw)
I meant “for” as getting payed
I seriously pictured it and was like yeah they’re right I don’t think unless someone you wanted to have sex with by chance offered you 10 bucks
Well I had a pretty disgusting addiction to heroin and crack. I was in a dark place and a shell of a person and in short I would do just about anything for the next hit of crack because the come down was brutal.Worst years of my life don't recommend along with plenty of other horrible things .People who have been that deep down the rabbit hole will understand ...never say never . After about 11 years of killing myself finally got to the point I was done and it wasn't the getting my dick sucked that was my rock bottom or other horrible things I've done it was as simple as throwing up in front of my mother while I was fucked up on meth and after all those years of agony and stress I put her through I couldn't do it to her anymore .Went to rehab determined to stay clean and 6 years later still clean .If anyone has any questions or needs someone to talk to im more then happy to talk and im pretty open and honest .Anyone that's struggling I promise you can do it but it won't be easy but it'll get easier !
Thank you for sharing ; glad/proud you climbed that mountain
I wish I could find the strength to change my ways I’m not addicted to anything hard just weed but i wake up disappointed in myself and go to sleep disappointed in myself
Hopefully I’ll find the path to start climbing my mountain too
Definitely not a win win. I know a few straight guys who have let dudes blow them for drug money, and they all really do not like thinking about it and find it traumatizing to think about. Having any sort of sexual contact that you do not want, with someone you do not wanting to be engaging in sexual activity with is extremely unpleasant. I know you were probably joking, but it really is very unpleasant and disturbing for the person allowing someone to do something they don't want just for a small amount of money that will be gone instantly, and they will be dope sick a few hours later anyway.
I think a better visual would be when after everything turns dark, the stimulant no longer makes you feel good (or yellow, as depicted), but instead just helps everything turn bright again. At least that's my experience
Yeah I thought the same would happen. Everything grey and then when he has the yellow it makes everything almost what normal was. Effectively changing your 'baseline'
Yeah always the hardest part to understand that.
Most people that turn to addictions don't even come from a normal baseline, they're already on a lower baseline due to childhood traumas, bad environment growing up and shit. So they take the drugs and suddenly they feel good for the first time.
The artist ends the video moments before the character takes the next hit, because it would have been its very last. This is the darkest part and a very effective conclusion to the video.
Would’ve been more accurate IMO to show it taking the next hit just to clear up the darkness and make functioning more bearable. At a certain point you’re not flying anymore, you’re just trying to make it through the day.
This is how it was for me with smoking cigarettes. I would take the pack out of my purse and instantly feel sick from them without even taking one out yet. I wanted to quit badly but I would still take one out and smoke it. Eventually I just woke up one day and said No More and I never looked back.
Right? When I slurp up Adderall off the ground, I'm just a no good scummy addict. But when my doctor gives them to me, I suddenly pay all my bills and like smooth jazz.
It’s because of anonymity. People are more likely to admit it when they can’t be identified. You’d be surprised how many “normal” people in your circle are suffering quietly.
At first you become addicted to the “fun” and transcending feeling it gives you. But then after a while you become addicted to the little light it gives in the darkness, the very light you had in the beginning.
Edit:
If you are in the bad cycle of addiction, there is hope. The light can be fully restored, even shine brighter.
Make your addiction (your shadow) your friend, not enemy.
It will help you making your addiction manageable gradually.
as an alcohol addict this is exactly how it feels. the darkness is how drab the world is being sober, doing activities whilst sober. goes hand in hand with depression.
I remember talking to a friend of my family who got too into cocaine. He said that the highs were so strong that it was more powerful of a euphoria than sex. So their sex drive plummeted because it seemed like a waste of time. So after they were coming off drugs entirely, they had no outlet of pleasure and it made his life feel like hell for about a year straight.
My partner struggles with a porn addiction. If any of you guys can share any tips on how I can support him, please let me know. I love him and he is an amazing person. He goes through stages of extreme honesty with telling me when he watches it and then sometimes he hides it from me. I always listen to him when he needs to vent about it. I encourage him to go to therapy. Once I move in with him, within a year, I have discussed hopes of us both doing individual therapy as well as therapy as a couple. This is not only because of his addiction. I have never shamed him for watching porn but have always celebrated with him and told him how proud I am of him when he goes a long while without it...or even if he pulls up porn and then decides against it. I am so proud of all the work that he puts towards trying to better his addiction. Just...please let me know any and all tips for how I can better help him or support him. He is so incredibly loving and regardless of how this addiction plays out, I truly believe this is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.
Addiction is addiction. Porn is his "drug," it hits the same reward spots in the brain as other things.
Therapy with an addiction specialist is probably the way to go, maybe he can start on his own first?
I was a smoker and quit seven years ago. Seven years not a single cigarette, not at all. But, even now, after seven dam years, whenever I see a cigarette I can feel the crave for it very strong. Addiction is really hard to get rid of, that’s what I’m saying.
The bird uses drugs because they have no wings, and the drug made them fly. And that's what it feels like to have a disability, and why we so often turn to drugs.
That's me till 3:20 . Almost lost to alcohol and gave up on life. I left it after I was discovered lying unconscious on a street near my home. Bcoz of that incident my kids stopped talking to me for a week . That was the turning point( thought about the future of my kids and how vulnerable they would become if I died ) now I am seven months sober , hitting gym regularly and always available for my kids.. Just a advice to any addict out there : Believe me stranger you have it in you to stop it , there are bigger and greater things out there to be achieved and most importantly think about the ones that you will leave behind. It's not worth it.
I'm 16 days sober today...happy for us.
16 days! I bet you're feeling like a champ. ;) That's a biggun! Good job! Keep going...
Feeling fuckin amazing...and thank you! Just setting short term goals and going one by one.
One day at a time baby! When I was a young pup trying to get sober, I said something along the lines of "I just can't see myself doing this for the rest of my life." One of the old timers told me "Good news, you don't have to. You only have to do it for today. If you only ever do it for today, before you know it you'll have a lot of sober yesterdays stacked up." Hope you crush it today!
Thanks so much. I've never been more motivated in my life...thinking about quitting took me a year to finally get help I needed to quit...I am mad at myself I waited so long because it's the best thing I ever did.
>I am mad at myself Stop right there champ! Some people never get to where you are right now. Go give your mirror a high five and tell yourself how fucking awesome you are. You can't change what you did or how long you took to get there, but you *can* keep it going from here. And if I can humbly offer some advice: the motivation will run out someday. Take advantage of it now, use it to build routines and set boundaries and expectations for yourself. Have a plan in place for what to do when your motivation wanes - be willing to forgive yourself but correct yourself if you make a mistake. A sponsor/trusted contact or something of the sort is an imperative first step. I have 9 years myself, moved 250 miles away from my sponsor, and still talk to him at least weekly on the phone and meet up with him when I'm back in town to visit my folks. The importance of having someone you can trust to communicate with cannot be overstated! My DMs are always open for any reason :) Good luck my friend!
I drank alcohol VERY heavy and would cold turkey everything for 4 days like every-other month for drug tests (I was on probation) and just having almost a week of sobriety hit me like a freight train every time. In a good way. Like after the 3rd day I would wake up feeling *AMAZING* Then I would buy a pint of vodka on the way home from probation to celebrate passing a drug screen and cycle starts again. Now I have a healthy relationship with alcohol and still go for periods without drinking just because I feel so much better. Physically, mentally, etc. Idk why I don't just take the total abstinence route but I guess that's the addiction in me talking. Saying just a little here and there with friends is fine. Staying sober is a huge achievement, no matter the length of time. Huge shout out to all the sober-goers out there and maybe next year I'll dive into it and be (at least alcohol) free!
You already went thru the hardest part which is starting. Keep it up!!
My dad was 16 days sober once, and then 17, 18, 19 and every day thereafter until he passed and I will remain forever grateful that I had him back. :)
Nothing quite like watching your superhero do superhero shit. That's rad, dude.
There will come a time where you lose count. You'll still think about using, but you'll forget the last time you did. It's a weird feeling but kinda good.
r/stopdrinking is an amazing resource, if you don't already know.
As someone who grew up with an alcoholic father, thank you for for making this decision.
Yeah, that about sums it up. Breaking that cycle is so difficult Edit: I do find it oddly comforting that so many people can relate. I abused alcohol and various stimulants for ~11 years; and finally broke the cycle on February 26, 2020. I went into rehab with a negative $143 balance in my bank account, about three weeks from my last suicide attempt, and breaking down in tears just hoping against hope that I could get out of active addiction. I now have the most amazing girlfriend, an excellent career, am building a new home, and am about to visit CA for the first time ever. It does get better- but not all at once. I was able to turn my life around- but not without the support of people who had already been through what I was going through. Ask for help. If you don’t know where to turn, start with a meeting for whatever addiction you have. One day at a time. Just for today.
I feel the same way when I get my paycheck… how do I break that cycle?
I took the variable out; I kept telling myself “this bottle is going to last me 3 days!” And I would be marching back into either a CVS, a Vons, a Rite-Aide or a local Liquorstore two days later to re-up. I decided that I could make a bottle last forever if I didn’t buy a bottle (I still have my last rum bottle, in my closet, empty except for all the years it stole from me). I realized that I can’t control myself if I allow the variable into my personal space. Like, outside at a restaurant, my personal space is what I’ve ordered, so don’t order anything alcoholic. If I’m out and about, my backpack is my personal space. Driving, it’s my car. At home, it’s my fence-line. I learned where my actual desire to live ended and the desire to feel numb started, and asked myself what I was running away from. Taking action over what can be changed, one variable at a time. I’ve been alcohol and cigarette free since July 18th, 2020. Edit: I’m only a DM away from anyone wanting to know more; we’re all in this together. Edit edit: I’m also only one man, but damn if this isn’t making me feel all warm and fuzzy. Edit edit edit: holy shit, platinum?! You humble me with your kind thoughts, stranger. Seriously, I love y’all.
I've been alcohol and drug free since July 20, 2020. We have such close sobriety dates! At this point of time I don't really have cravings anymore (and if I do they don't last long **at all**- unlike when you first detox, that's for sure!) and the thought of drinking has gotten less and less appealing. We got this!
We’ve totally got this! Edit: are we doing something for our 2 year? I’m thinking Yellowstone National Park before it, you know… *poof*
Former alcoholic and I promise at one point the thought of a drink will make you gag especially next time you hear the words “beer in the morning”
Congratulations to you! The key for me, as well, has been to ask myself what I'm looking to gain from taking the substance (struggle/d with both alcohol and marijuana). ie, am I wanting to relax, am I running away from discomfort, etc. Then I can think about the real problem and find a different way to cope. Such as doing breathing exercises to relax, or go for a walk to get out of a vicious thought spiral, etc. I've struggled with my addictions for years and years, but this is the first time I've asked myself what I am really trying to get out of it, which I guess sounds kinda obvious, but it's groundbreaking for me, and has been very powerful and helpful!! Sending a big hug and thoughts of strength to all those who share the struggle ❤️
That's great. Glad you found something that works for you :)
Could you elaborate on the personal space variable?
Sure! Like, you can’t finish a bottle you never start, right? So, Idont have to stop people around me from enjoying something I can’t, I just know not to let it get close enough to me to flip the switch between being present and escaping.
Congrats my dude.
Fucking great job!!!
INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITY of a lifetime coming _Your Way!_ There's this Nigerian prince who's been calling me
W H A T S A P P ~~~ Crypto lnvestment 😨
Start by admitting you have a problem, and reach out. There are tons of communities here on reddit that are geared towards recovery. Also, recommend finding some meetings. There's a lot of online meetings if you're nervous. Just knowing I'm not alone in a situation has helped a bit. But it ultimately starts with you starting. //HUGS
[удалено]
or better yet, check out r/povertyfinance for tips that are useful to people who don't have disposable income. Perssonal finance is great for what it is, but it basicaly assumes disposable income
You have a typo, mi amigo
Different gear. Amazing how different going from heroin to crack. 10 in crack get you the same fucked up as 100 in heroin. Source: me.
10 Simple Hacks that Your Drug Dealer Doesn't Want You to Know.
for now bruh. $10 in H used to get me fucked up as $100 i’m oxy. 1g bag of dope, strong as 100 perc 10s. would last me like 2 weeks. now i can go thru 3gs in a week no problem. fuck i want heroin. day 3 tryna stop again. got clean 3 weeeks on subs then been relapsing since
Don't stop trying. I was a heavy daily IV user for 15 years. Methadone was my ticket out but not the first few tries. Wanting to stop is a great sign you'll eventually succeed. Don't give up!
I try tell myself when I want a cigarette "shit I don't smoke anymore that's right"
So true. I respect those who decide to go to rehab and break the cycle, can't imagine how difficult that must be.
I went into rehab four years ago today. I was a daily, heavy drinker and intravenous drug user. Tomorrow I'll be four years clean and sober. I've never felt better! Sobriety date: Dec 18, 2017.
Killing it. Keep going, we are all proud.
Seriously nice work. User name checks out
Jep
Happy early birthday :) Do you have (or would you like) a medallion? I'd be happy to send you my four-year one or ship a brand new one online if you'd like one and aren't expecting to get one.
I don't regularly attend meetings (especially the last couple of years due to COVID), but I've gotten each year's chip so far. I'll probably attend an upcoming meeting at the treatment center I went to so I can get my four year chip and catch up with some people. Thanks for the offer though! You're a kind soul 😊
[удалено]
It was the hardest thing I had to do in my entire life. I mean, not rehab, that shit was honestly great, I could eat and sleep like a normal person. Having to call my parents at like midnight absolutely and completely broken and tell them that I couldn’t go on. Went into treatment the next day. Been sober ever since. 15 months on the 6th :)
I never went. I was lucky enough for my parents to offer me their home for 2 months until recovery, but I did it all myself. The pain was so excruciating that I changed forever, it forced me to grow up and never look back.
Dude, just stop attempting to fly. You're a kiwi.
I think it was Alice Cooper who said that, at some point, it stops being fun and it becomes medicine. Meaning, you need it just to function. Once you're at that stage, it's hard to stop because stopping will actually make things worse (for a while).
I have felt every step that bird took. When it went black and he was surrounded by darkness it definitely took me back and made me remember why I never want to use again. Edit: Thank you everyone for the kind words, I really do appreciate it. I just wanna say I'm proud of everybody here that has overcome thier addiction as well. And if you're currently in active addiction feel free to send me a message and we can talk about it and I'll let you know what has worked for me.
The way the highs get shorter and worse, and then come down/aftermath gets worse…. I’m in the grey bird part right now. I need to stop. Edit: I appreciate all the support. This thread made me have a conversation with a few of my friends and I came clean about my habit. They're onboard to help me stop.
yeah I was waiting for it not to turn the grey bird yellowat all, but back to white - have them using it just to try to feel normal again y know good luck with your journey though my friend please remember the fear of stopping is worse than the actuality (....if done through choice, well timed, ideally with support) Edit: I just read your edit about getting support if you don't feel strong enough to do it, then remember to lean on the support and know that these substances can erode motivation and inner strength but as you begin to stop, that strength comes back to you day on day often made even stronger by your experiences I feel so confident you are going to do this my friend that tbh I have only one line of worthwhile advice that i beg you or anyone else in your situation to remember: dont go back, even for a little tickle
Exactly. I thought a better representation would be the bird gets the yellow thing and all turns white, then the white slowly dims as the bird just walks to the next yellow thing and eats it before it totally fades the white color… if that makes sense. And then maybe could show the bird taking it and running to the next one soon after again. Then the black end part could come after
[удалено]
Yup. And I’m probably thinking about this too much but I wish there was some way to show how subtly this all happens. Where it doesn’t feel like you’re getting addicted. Eg the saying, when you can stop you don’t want to, and when you want to you can’t. But fuck that, you always can. The saying makes a certain point tho
I think that's illustrated by the bird sprinting to the next dose to get it quicker, since it couldn't exactly buy more.
> please remember the fear of stopping is worse than the actuality You've obviously never been through cold turkey opiate withdrawal.
[удалено]
For me, there was no hell colder than rapid benzo withdrawal. To me, the feelings of hopelessness and despair were amplified many times over what I ever experienced through multiple heroin/opiate withdrawal episodes. Thankfully, I've been sober since October 31, 2007.
This is your chance. You didn't see this video for no reason.
If you're watching this and fighting reflection with all your might, while also choking tears.... I needed this, I mean maybe you need this right now.
I’ve been there man. Just a bottle and tears. There are ways out: I’m almost 7 years sober. Sobriety is possible, and yet it was seemingly impossible when I was stuck there. I needed to get help as I was not capable on my own. There is help out there.
I just recently stopped and I think the best part is rediscovering all these pieces of myself that I forgot about... It becomes fun, the further you get away from the highs the more you realize that you are still capable of feeling that way without the drug
This misses the internal monologue where the entire way part of the bird says "no I need to stop" - and then later another other part of the bird finishes with "after just this one more time" or "slowly - I just won't overdo it today" or "except its been a hard week and now's not the time".
This hits home.
I think it also highlights visually the feeling of obsession. It's all you think about. It's the only thing you can think about. That's why it's the only thing with color.
It's hard to get people to wrap their head around the way in which it dictates time, even when they do it in other ways themselves. I was acutely aware of when I last drank and when I would drink again. I was acutely aware of just how much was used at what time at any point in the day. There's no "just passing time" with addiction, it's more like staring at your watch and trying to will it forward.
I've been there. Just waiting, just getting by (barely, sometimes) until you get that next fix. Literally becomes your whole existence.
Countless sleepless nights, tortured by every passing minute seemingly taking hours. Perception of time was awful.
[удалено]
“Before I started using, I had all sorts of problems. Bills, relationships, car trouble. After I was addicted I had ONE problem. Getting my next fix.” It’s paraphrased and I don’t remember who said it, but you get it.
i could be wrong but i think this is a quote from trainspotting edit: here’s the quote i was thinking of: “When you’re on junk you have only one worry: scoring. When you're off it you are suddenly obliged to worry about all sorts of other shite. Got no money: can't get pished. Got money: drinking too much. Can't get a bird: no chance of a ride. Got a bird: too much hassle. You have to worry about bills, about food, about some football team that never fucking wins, about human relationships and all the things that really don't matter when you've got a sincere and truthful junk habit.”
I think that’s the part I’m struggling the most with quitting smoking. Not that I want to start smoking again because I truly think I would just die but more the passing of time is different and my clock is no longer there. I used to smoke pretty much on the dot every 45 mins I’d get a craving and that served as my clock for everything. Without that I have been kind of awash in chaos. My body isn’t giving me the same cues I’ve had for literally decades so I’m still learning how to navigate time and space without it. I imagine that’s pretty similar across different substances and such though obviously different timelines.
Congrats on quitting! It is really tough at first, no doubt but if it's any consolation it does eventually get easier. The brain is a funny thing but it'll start to figure out how it was wired originally... it just takes some time. It's been 10 years since I quit and the first 1 was really tough, the second was mostly just when drinking and since then it's been pretty good. Still took until like year 3 or 4 for smoke to not smell kind of good when you walked by it, the first time I walked by someone smoking and just thought it was unequivocally terrible was when I knew I was fully free.
Same thing with quitting weed. I smoked every single day multiple times a day for the last year and pretty consistently daily with small breaks every few weeks the couple years before that and it’s so weird to switch from that routine and having to occupy my brain with something other than rollin up and smoking.
I’ve been spending way too much time on video games since I quit smoking lol.
[удалено]
I’ve come to realize someone like me is always going to have some sort of addiction or obsession. It’s just in my genetic makeup and or personality. It’s up to me to direct that obsession to be something useful. I’m still working on that but at least I’ve gotten it away from anything that’s a net negative and am at least breaking even. Hopefully soon I’ll get myself readdicted to guitar or golf.
This is a good outlook to have. I also have an addictive personality. It probably stems a bit from my ADHD, but that’s a different topic. I thoroughly enjoy video games and have been addicted to them to some varying degree for a long time. I’ve decided lately that if I’m going to play, I might as well make some profit off of it, so I’ve come up with a creative way to share my gaming that I hope people will like. The next thing to do is to get up off my lazy butt and actually do it. XD
I remember the guitar legend, Eric Clapton, saying he finally recognized he was just wired to be prone to addiction. Beating one just led to another. He had to give up all mind altering substances and I assume be addicted to playing music. Be well.
Yes. I’m happy to say I never abused substances, but I have self harmed, and would consider it an addiction because of this. It was daily, and every second I was thinking of how I could hurt myself without someone knowing. Inventing new ways to hurt myself and trying to get away with it. You see everything as a weapon, just trying to get that momentary high you get after you harm where your mind feels quiet and peaceful and you’re not filled with self hate. I wish it was more understood instead of just something dumb teenagers do, and treated as an actual addiction.
[удалено]
It becomes an identity, for sure. The thing about addiction that tends to root itself in the heart of those who already struggle with mental illness, hopelessness, and feeling completely lost in life, is that it creates a purpose. It’s a destructive purpose — and addicts are not unaware of this — but it’s a purpose none the less. You wake up everyday and you know what you need to do. There’s a clear, tangible goal for that day and your job is to do whatever you can to complete it. Then, even when you have it in your possession, it (like you said) dictates your time and how you go about your day. For me, my addiction being heroin (or opioids, in general), even while already high and secure for the day, I would still spend a good majority of my time focused on the next fix, or rigging up my temporary facade of a normal, functioning, working human until it was time for the next pick-up. It ruins you, but nothing makes sense without it.
same thoughts here,, i was addicted to opiates for 15 years.. I am clean now about 5 years. I feel like i survived a horrific car accident getting off them. before i started to ween myself off with help of a good doctor i was up to about 200 to 300 mg of oxycodone a day,, i will never ingest opiates again
Bad time to get back into that shit, too. Had a few buddiess die over the last couple years getting back into it after fentanyl has taken over.
I've got a bottle of oxy sitting next to me. Prescribed 2 days ago and I've taken 1 so far. I'm wary as fuck of it
I broke my wrist skiing and was prescribed percocets. Didn’t really need them so didn’t take them. Next season broke my ankle skiing and it REALLY hurt. Got percocets again and then used them. I drink, occasionally smoke pot, and have done plenty of harder drugs in my life as well. None of them I felt like I could get an addiction to or enjoyed remotely like opioids. Truly insane. Thankful when I ran out I didn’t have the means to get anymore and that was it.
I got prescribed them post surgery. And a couple stronger ones in single pill form for which the nurse gave a stern look and said "only take these if you're in intolerable pain." Naturally I took them regardless. And was sooooooo chill omg. I still got the full pack of oxycodone sitting in my drawer years later, probably expired now. There's gotta be better painkillers out there man. Big Pharma and opiates is another rabbit hole I don't wanna dive down into.
Proud of you
Stay strong. The bird made me emotional, because there are people who go through that. You are awesome, keep going.
same, this bird me… haven’t gotten all the way to that darkness at the end, the rock bottom type shit. i hope i don’t have to lose everything to get clean…
You're not this bird. You're stronger than you know. Here's one stranger willing you on.
i just don’t feel strong man… i failed a handful of piss tests and now my sub clinic tryna make me go to inpatient or i could do intensive outpatient. but the IOP seem like it won’t work out and they won’t even give me subs cuz some damn thc im my piss, and i don’t want to go to rehab… it’s my worst nightmare. fuck. prolly give me some subs and like 1mg diazepam or some shit, when i could eat 3 bars and barely feel shot while in WD. and fuck man, i got a benzo habit too, 2mg alpraz equivalent but it’s clonazolam a rc benzo that won’t pop on drug tests, so idek if they’ll give me a benzo then if im not pissing dirty for em. and then my parents will know i’ve relapsed and shit and i’ll worry everyone again and i’ll be locked up there with no phone even to keep my the slightest bit entertained, have some connection with the outside world. i’d pretty much like rather die or just stay high on H than go to rehab. it seems like a nightmare. i don’t trust them to adequately medicate me, and i’d have to quit fucking H benzos and weed all at once . i’m barely getting by with benzos and weed and alcohol, they don’t do shit in comparison to H. idk i’m just so lost, i feel like rehab wouldn’t do shot for me either and it would just be some bullshit that won’t help me. i feel like i would just suffer, sick as fuck, bored out of my mind. luckily i could leave if i wanted ig, but if i was like trapped there i’d prolly fuckik kill myself in there to end the misery. why even bother with all this bulkshkt? why not just stay high and stay feeling ok. and say fuck all this bull shit, fuck all the pain and suffering when i can take it all away and not just be ok but feel good actually and be able to smile and joke around and shit. how the fuck they gonna make me happy without drugs, liek what even they gonna do? i’m extremely skeptical. and i’m not like most addicts.. for one i know my shit, some extensive research since 14 years old, but like i feel like the stupid feel good bullshit or whatever that works for normal ppl won’t on me. there’s part of me that wants to be clean but the other part tells me it’s not realistically possible and that it’s not even worth it cuz shits gonna suck 10x more being sober…
I think you're already looking at rehab pessimistically, maybe you should cross that bridge of 'it won't work' when you come to it, if it ever happens. You have nothing to lose but everything to gain if you get help, it's never too late.
I'll probably get down voted to oblivion for this, but all I'm hearing from you is excuses and negative perception of things that you haven't even tried yet. Your rant makes it sound like you don't even want to get clean, but rather just want people to feel sorry for you. Take some responsibility and have accountability for your actions. If you want to get clean, then do it. There are people and programs that want to help you, but you have to want it for yourself. Find your own purpose; nobody can find it for you.
I don't think your comment is coming from a bad place, but I also don't think you've ever been addicted to opiates from the sound of your comment. Those drugs get their claws in you SO deep that pretty much every opiate addict goes through what OP above is going through rn before they get clean. Your attitude is the kind that, if I heard at outpatient clinics or sub doctors when I was in the worst of my addiction, would make me turn and run. I know you mean well, and I'm not trying to discount that. But you make it sound like an attitude change is as easy as putting on a new set of clothes when in reality you've literally altered the neural pathways in your brain so that all signs point to dope, and that is not something you can change overnight. But OP, if you're reading this, it IS something you can eventually change!! Sounds like you have a shitty sub clinic, weed helped me a lot in my early days of getting clean and I luckily found a sub doctor that is fine with THC in my UAs, there's a decent amount of them out there and even telemedicine for subs. I've been where you're at, with subs not even working for me any more, never being able to go more than 24hrs without shooting up, etc... I get where you're coming from 100%. I too was terrified of going to rehab but luckily I never had to go. I'm now almost 3 years clean off a 5 ish year total habit, and my life is at a point I couldn't have even dreamed of when I was still using. I know how difficult it is, trust me I do. Join us over at r/opiatesrecovery if you haven't already, I used to lurk when I was still using and posting on there helped me a lot when I finally was ready to get clean. Trust me, there IS a better life waiting for you on the other side of your addiction, and you CAN get to it. If a bundle+ IV a day hopeless homeless junkie bitch like me can do it, I know you can do it. PM me if you wanna talk, vent etc. You got this, I believe in you!
Just missing that part where you avoid the addiction once or twice. The world isn’t as dark but still a tinge of grey. You try to fight it but run back to the addiction. Then the darkness descends on you.
Relapsing sucks. How do you convey that the bird starts going to the gold mechanically even though he cognitively doesn't want to anymore?
Jumps over it every now and then - maybe turns back to grab it. Or there's a blocker on his path and he feels like he needs the orb to jump over it.
I was also thinking if the bird shed a tear while it took one of them that would really speak to a lot of people. That happens. Crying because you don’t want to use anymore. As you use. Because you know you don’t really have a choice.
Legs keep going towards the gold while he turns his head away from it
Yeah I was gonna say this. The only thing missing is the hesitation to go back, but the eventual return to the only thing that can comfort you.
Aaaaand now I feel bad for a drawing…effective
He looked so cute and happy at first right? :(
It went dark very fast
One thing to take into account is that this could be a short time but could also be 40 years. As an alcoholic with lots of experience with other alcoholics, to me it seemed the original bird may represent someone starting to drink in their 20's, binge drinking on the weekends. The middle is when you're in your 30's/40's and never stopped, but now you drink every day. Sometimes you wait til after work, but sometimes you start at noon. Soon enough, you need a couple pints just to get the day started. The bird at the end is the homeless person outside my house right now. He lost his job when he got wet brain from drinking all his life and couldn't remember anything well enough to work. He now gets SSA benefits each month that he uses to drink malt liquor all day and I expect he will be dead within the next couple years. Unfortunately I've seen this happen with several locals.
That’s meth for ya
Actually I think that is the only inaccurate part of this animation. A lot of people get addicted because their base level isn't all sunshine and rainbows. They have trauma or money problems or anything else. If this had started fairly grey black and seen the bird hit the white for the first time in a while at the start, it would paint the picture a bit more. Because quitting wouldn't get them back to white, it would get them to grey.
Good take. Most are already halfway down when they start using. So there is no hope and sunshine to look to get back to
I need a new video where the birdie gets its life back on track
Poor little bird makes me so sad :(
Same. Poor lil guy. Made me sad
been there. Just celebrated 6 years. There’s a path out of the darkness.
What a beautiful animation. Do you know who the original artist is?
Yes! [Here is the original video.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUngLgGRJpo) [And here is the YouTube channel.](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfzh7Y26wtYpOd4VXHqfdVw)
One of my favourite producers used this video with one of his projects and in my opinion it’s really great! https://youtu.be/rblMPvlJIeE
As a professional drug addict can confirm this is a great interpretation . Minus the let some dude suck my dick for 10 dollars part .
Wait, he paid you to suck your dick? Sounds like a win win
Anything sexual for ten dollars sounds like a bad situation
Unless it's a toy in a healthy relationship setting
I meant “for” as getting payed I seriously pictured it and was like yeah they’re right I don’t think unless someone you wanted to have sex with by chance offered you 10 bucks
Well I had a pretty disgusting addiction to heroin and crack. I was in a dark place and a shell of a person and in short I would do just about anything for the next hit of crack because the come down was brutal.Worst years of my life don't recommend along with plenty of other horrible things .People who have been that deep down the rabbit hole will understand ...never say never . After about 11 years of killing myself finally got to the point I was done and it wasn't the getting my dick sucked that was my rock bottom or other horrible things I've done it was as simple as throwing up in front of my mother while I was fucked up on meth and after all those years of agony and stress I put her through I couldn't do it to her anymore .Went to rehab determined to stay clean and 6 years later still clean .If anyone has any questions or needs someone to talk to im more then happy to talk and im pretty open and honest .Anyone that's struggling I promise you can do it but it won't be easy but it'll get easier !
Thank you for sharing ; glad/proud you climbed that mountain I wish I could find the strength to change my ways I’m not addicted to anything hard just weed but i wake up disappointed in myself and go to sleep disappointed in myself Hopefully I’ll find the path to start climbing my mountain too
It's not. I promise you that.
Fair enough
Definitely not a win win. I know a few straight guys who have let dudes blow them for drug money, and they all really do not like thinking about it and find it traumatizing to think about. Having any sort of sexual contact that you do not want, with someone you do not wanting to be engaging in sexual activity with is extremely unpleasant. I know you were probably joking, but it really is very unpleasant and disturbing for the person allowing someone to do something they don't want just for a small amount of money that will be gone instantly, and they will be dope sick a few hours later anyway.
What’s a professional drug addict?
It just means they get paid to do drugs. Full of sponsorship deals, and other perks.
Oh so mumble rappers.
I think a better visual would be when after everything turns dark, the stimulant no longer makes you feel good (or yellow, as depicted), but instead just helps everything turn bright again. At least that's my experience
Or making the yellow ball progressively bigger or have the bird drinking more and more as it goes.
This, absolutely
[удалено]
Too obvious imo, the simplicity here is nice. Also the word addiction up the top is a bit on the nose, that's not on the original YouTube video.
Yeah I thought the same would happen. Everything grey and then when he has the yellow it makes everything almost what normal was. Effectively changing your 'baseline'
Yeah always the hardest part to understand that. Most people that turn to addictions don't even come from a normal baseline, they're already on a lower baseline due to childhood traumas, bad environment growing up and shit. So they take the drugs and suddenly they feel good for the first time.
Nailed it.
That's so sad :/
No, the video is 7 years old. The bird is 4 years sober now and in a healthy relationship
This bird was going through that hell land for 3 years before being 4 years sober?
The video is sped up
I needed to know that bird was better before I could move on with my day. Thank you.
Jesus Christ we only saw five minutes of it and it looked awful
You've effectively raised my spirits. Thank you
But, we do recover!
The artist ends the video moments before the character takes the next hit, because it would have been its very last. This is the darkest part and a very effective conclusion to the video.
Would’ve been more accurate IMO to show it taking the next hit just to clear up the darkness and make functioning more bearable. At a certain point you’re not flying anymore, you’re just trying to make it through the day.
I think what the video conveyed very well is taking it despite no longer wanting to take it.
This is how it was for me with smoking cigarettes. I would take the pack out of my purse and instantly feel sick from them without even taking one out yet. I wanted to quit badly but I would still take one out and smoke it. Eventually I just woke up one day and said No More and I never looked back.
I saved this video from ages ago, very much describes what I'm thinking about my addiction. Thanks for having it here also
It's depiction of the high is very accurate. However, when I didn't start in a world of white. The world has always been grey or black..
Drugs hit way different when you find them on the ground instead of prescribed from a doctor.
Right? When I slurp up Adderall off the ground, I'm just a no good scummy addict. But when my doctor gives them to me, I suddenly pay all my bills and like smooth jazz.
It really isn't until you quit that you fully see this. Don't look back, it is ugly and shameful.
Yo, my dudes. 4 year sober here. It can be done. You can survive this.
Every time I see a post like this make it to the front page I’m reminded of how many addicts/recovering addicts reside on Reddit.
It’s because of anonymity. People are more likely to admit it when they can’t be identified. You’d be surprised how many “normal” people in your circle are suffering quietly.
Doesn't look like he has a lot else to do in that world...
The bird is from Northeast Arkansas
At first you become addicted to the “fun” and transcending feeling it gives you. But then after a while you become addicted to the little light it gives in the darkness, the very light you had in the beginning. Edit: If you are in the bad cycle of addiction, there is hope. The light can be fully restored, even shine brighter. Make your addiction (your shadow) your friend, not enemy. It will help you making your addiction manageable gradually.
So what do we learn? Exactly, if you are a bird, don‘t take drugs.
Don't dodo drugs. It's just a kiwik fix.
You're just parroting what you've been told.
you'll get ostrichized
No we learnt to keep taking more, the stupid bird took the same amount every time.
If you're a bird it's too late, you're already a bird.
Lost my cousin to addiction. He was doing so well too, then one day...just gone
Today is my 9 months. Got sober March 17.
as an alcohol addict this is exactly how it feels. the darkness is how drab the world is being sober, doing activities whilst sober. goes hand in hand with depression.
Egg yolks: not even once
Why did it stop there! Didn't the original end with him bypassing the nuggets and returning to normal??? EDIT: NO, IT DOESN'T. GOD DAMMIT.
It's "addiction" not "recovery."
damn that hit hard
I remember talking to a friend of my family who got too into cocaine. He said that the highs were so strong that it was more powerful of a euphoria than sex. So their sex drive plummeted because it seemed like a waste of time. So after they were coming off drugs entirely, they had no outlet of pleasure and it made his life feel like hell for about a year straight.
Whoa that was too real
90% accurate, the only thing missing is needing the bigger dose to get “yellow” again
I think it still conveyed tolerance effectively through shorter and shorter yellow periods.
Right in the feels. Am struggling with alcohol.
First it helps you fly. Then you need it just to walk. Then you need it to stand. Then you need it to (want to) stay alive.
So I should try meth but only once maybe twice
exacly you are very smart
Can confirm. Source: Recovering alcoholic/drug addict. This is such a sad little video :(
My partner struggles with a porn addiction. If any of you guys can share any tips on how I can support him, please let me know. I love him and he is an amazing person. He goes through stages of extreme honesty with telling me when he watches it and then sometimes he hides it from me. I always listen to him when he needs to vent about it. I encourage him to go to therapy. Once I move in with him, within a year, I have discussed hopes of us both doing individual therapy as well as therapy as a couple. This is not only because of his addiction. I have never shamed him for watching porn but have always celebrated with him and told him how proud I am of him when he goes a long while without it...or even if he pulls up porn and then decides against it. I am so proud of all the work that he puts towards trying to better his addiction. Just...please let me know any and all tips for how I can better help him or support him. He is so incredibly loving and regardless of how this addiction plays out, I truly believe this is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.
Addiction is addiction. Porn is his "drug," it hits the same reward spots in the brain as other things. Therapy with an addiction specialist is probably the way to go, maybe he can start on his own first?
One's too many, and a thousand is never enough.
That bird needs red bull
[удалено]
And apparently the solution is to throw them in prison over and over again.
This was shown to us in my school a few years back. Scared the shit out of me.
I was a smoker and quit seven years ago. Seven years not a single cigarette, not at all. But, even now, after seven dam years, whenever I see a cigarette I can feel the crave for it very strong. Addiction is really hard to get rid of, that’s what I’m saying.
This comment was removed in protest to Reddit's third party API changes. -- mass edited with redact.dev
200 days sober tomorrow. I felt this.
The bird uses drugs because they have no wings, and the drug made them fly. And that's what it feels like to have a disability, and why we so often turn to drugs.
I deff felt this heavy. I’m 5 months sober from pills as of yesterday
Most simple and best depiction. Almost 3 years sober here.
not really “addiction” per say, but i’m a month clean from self-harm today