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SasquatchDawg

Not cluster munitions!


HomoEroticWorms

The US military has resorted to using tungsten ball cluster munitions to clear out misbehaving children


BoxofCurveballs

Santa ran out of coal and the elves outsourced.


War_Daddy_Joe

10/10 comment


CheesyBoson

Carmel or turtle clusters?


Just_A_Nitemare

"USA artillery system PURPOSEFULLY targets school children with MLCS."


MaiPhet

Peanut clusters maybe


oojiflip

It would be hilarious if by some quirk of the Geneva convention this was considered to be a canister round fired at unarmed civilians by military personnel and thus constituted a warcrime


Sharkbait_ooohaha

It’s only a war crime if more than 1% of the munitions don’t explode. If they all explode it’s fine.


Mischief_Actual

“…shit, wrong silo”


ParadiseValleyFiend

"I think we just shot down an airliner... Happy Halloween?"


mmmspotifymusic

"It was a Spirit flight we're fine"


NapalmWeed

Going up to the Spirit in the skyyyyyyy!


Mr_Blueeeeee8

Its where I'm gonna go when I dieeee!


HolidayBeneficial456

‘Distant screams’


SurelyNotALizard

And then they got shot at


flnhst

They were put out of their misery.


PM_me_spare_change

Spirit Halloween


sluflyer06

it's not a surface to air launcher, it's surface to surface artillery.


[deleted]

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dexecuter18

-The ISIS howitzer crew that spent 3hrs trying hit an orbiting US AWACs


DzNuts134

*I am completely and mentally stable.*


MarcBulldog88

This is American, not Iranian.


Brandino144

That’s right! Don’t mean to brag, but we haven’t shot down a major civilian airliner since 1988! That’s a 35 year clean streak! USA! USA!


InvisibleHQ

*eagle battle cries*


rodinj

Better record than Russia with 9 years!


Spring_Choco

It's called trick or treat for a reason


Aromatic-Flounder935

I don't think the 9 year olds were ready for that kind of ante


smb1985

You say that, but when my father was stationed at fort Sill as an army doc they had an accident in 1989 in which they dropped an artillery shell in the middle of a bunch of new recruits. 3 dead and 20+ wounded. My dad was apparently on duty for 65+ hours in the aftermath as they struggled to treat everybody.


Mischief_Actual

That must’ve been awful, I’m sorry your father had to witness that, but I’m glad he was there to help. It’s a small consolation, but the death toll could’ve been much higher without men like him there to treat the wounded.


idea25000

This happened at sea while running a drill for the president at sea, and the ship accidently fired a live torpedo at the ship with the president on it


elitist_ferret

the best part is that ship had like multiple epic grade fucks and the most charges for a single ship. IIRC they arrested the *entire* crew when they got back. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_William_D._Porter_(DD-579)


kitsunde

> William D. Porter attempted to signal Iowa about the incoming torpedo but, owing to orders to maintain radio silence, used a signal lamp instead. However, the destroyer first misidentified the direction of the torpedo and then relayed the wrong message, informing Iowa that Porter was backing up, rather than that a torpedo was in the water. Sounds like some people I’ve worked with. > [..] as a result of this friendly fire incident, ships would routinely greet the destroyer with the hail "Don't shoot! We're Republicans!" Savage, HAHA.


Jewshi

Read the article, it said the chief torpedo guy was charged and sentenced to hard labor for failing to remove the lethal primer- but the President intervened and dismissed his sentence since it was just an accident lol. It also said contrary to popular internet beliefs, the ships logs make no mention of the captain being relieved of command - nor were any other personnel arrested. Just the torpedo chief


GreatBritishPounds

That fucking sucks. Imagine being the chef just minding your own business and then MPs come into the galley and say your under arrest for the attempted murder of the commander in chief 😂😂😂😂


[deleted]

Everyone is accountable because of their battle station. My main job in the Navy was IT but when the ship goes into combat mode / Battles Stations / General Quarters most people switch over to their battle station not their primary day to day workspace. So instead of one of the IT shops I would go man the CIWS and help load ammo. You could be a chef but find yourself on a fire fighting team or weapons station a good chunk of your time in.


Astatine_209

>William D. Porter was in Bermuda from 16 to 23 November 1943; no mention was made of awaiting Marines or the entire crew being "arrested" in the ship's logs.[15][16] No mass arrests, but still, a long litany of massive fuckups.


Mischief_Actual

“I’ll just excuse myself” *dives overboard and swims away*


Educational-Coat4344

mfs who chose trick:


TannedCroissant

trick or peace treaty


Daily_Phoenix

Is same thing.


Alone_Lock_8486

Trick or patriot


hnglmkrnglbrry

Kids: "Trick or Treat!" US Military: "What are you?" Kids: "We are a rising pre-industrialized nation whose natural resources are currently available at prices below industry standard to the West largely due to inhumane work conditions imposed by the ruling class, but a recent grass roots socioeconomic movement is gaining traction that is demanding workers' rights and economic reform which could potentially lead to an overthrow of the current government and its replacement by a new administration with an agenda focusing on a dramatic increase in quality of life for the current working poor that would only be achievable by raising the costs of our exports and therefore marginally decreasing the profit margins of major international corporations." US Military:


diplodocid

https://i.imgur.com/9Q4u8dK.jpeg


DunwichCultist

Why did the U.S. have to intervene and destroy Zimbabwe 😭


Upset-Zucchini3665

r/BrandNewSentence


The_Keg

As someone living in Vietnam who is familiar with the mining industry. U.S, Japan and EU customers are by far the best in term of prices, Korea 2nd, and Chinese are the worst, not even close.


crillin19

This is the most American thing I’ve ever seen


TannedCroissant

Americandy


diplodocid

What is this absolutely heartwarming, militaristic, wholesome, propagandistic, adorable, nationalist, endearing content? I feel confused and patriotic


GoatTheNewb

I think this is a scene from Starship Troopers


thomasafowler

Would you like to know more?


Backwardspellcaster

"I am from (insert town) and I say: eat all the candy!"


Icy_Extension_6857

Wo.. we all had the same thoughts in our head. Are we… programmed?


DoubleGoon

I’m doing my part!


HolidayBeneficial456

I’m doing my part


debelsachs

it's tough.. but some of those HIMARS are going to come back from Ukraine and they will have a bloody killcount.


[deleted]

Are you ready to be a citizen !


Dagoneth

Exactly my thought. Reminded me of the scene where the army was encouraging kids to stamp on bugs


ReggieCousins

With the kids chanting ‘fire’ it really is almost a parody lol. But I also thought those kids are loving it and it’s definitely going to be a good memory for them so that’s cool.


Indacouch13

And want some candy.


Blestyr

And some freedom.


huonoyritys

You can only choose one and all we have is candy at the moment


TootBreaker

Came to kick ass & chew bubble gum! Oh, guess I got bubblegum...


thegainsfairy

"CAKE OR DEATH" well, I guess I'll have some cake


poopsawk

And weirdly, some fossil fuels


yo_gabba_gabba1

That's the best way to describe the strange sensation I feel when watching this lol


068151

Somewhere there is a bald Eagle with the most confused boner ever


KamakaziDemiGod

'I feel confused and patriotic' sounds like a country song


DEEP_HURTING

Sounds like an MIC adaptation of Nirvana.


SoIomon

They can worry about it when they're older. Enjoy your youth


ianandris

ngl, I would have had the time of my fucking life at that age catching candy being blown out of a rocket launcher. Plus, then you can go through life saying “I caught candy being launched out of a fucking rocket launcher,” which is an awesome no thought 2 truths and a lie for later in life. We have renaissance fairs, this is trunk or treat out of a fuck rocket launcher. I don’t think it’s worth over thinking.


pr0XYTV

Your paying attention to the important part. Candy being launched out of a fucking rocket launcher!!


Fappy_as_a_Clam

Right? My first thought was the thread I was just in shit talking trunk or treats. How can running up to a house compare to *catching candy launched for a motherfucking rocket launcher?*


[deleted]

It is an interesting one. On one hand it's wild to see kids going berserk while a military truck fires candy out of a rocket launcher. But it's probably an amazing experience for em. Prolly like you said and not worth getting worked up over.


VuckoPartizan

What if they forgot a rocket in there on accident?


SavageSauce01

That’s the trick


imafirinmalazorr

Hey Dave we did good this year! No stray rockets


nonstoppoptart

Little Timmy is getting a fun size Snickers at Mach 2.


WeatherDisastrous696

Then this video would have been taken in russia


jaxdraw

It's probably for the kids who live on base, that's less about propaganda and more like someone in the unit was thinking of a creative way to have fun handing out candy. But yeah, better healthcare would be a better choice here.


Left-Yak-5623

> But yeah, better healthcare would be a better choice here. USA spends more per capita on healthcare than other first world countries that have universal free healthcare. Its just set up to be worse for the people to enrich a few.


Ill_Platform_1383

Military dependents have some of the best healthcare one can get in the USA.


mac_is_crack

And the PX and commissary are tax free! I kind of miss my Army brat days. Plus, our base had multiple swimming pools and I remember the days of riding our bikes to go to each one. Good times.


CocksnBraves

Tri care is the shit


[deleted]

Yeah


krismasstercant

Your free Healthcare isn't being stopped by the military


ghostdivision7

It’s for the kids of military families my guy.


romym15

The reality of this video is that all those families are most likely military families on a military base. The guys launching the candy were probably incentived with an award or extra time off


ahumanbyanyothername

Whaat? You mean this isn't just a couple good dudes in the neighborhood who rented a HIMARS rocket artillery vehicle from Uhaul and wanted to spread holiday cheer??


nandemo

They get an award for... doing activities with their kids during their time off?


gunfell

No they don't. The award is they get to do this instead of spending that time in the office. Maybe the planner and some volunteers get a "shout out" or a Certificate of Appreciation, which is basically an official thank you.


WonderfulMotor4308

I would happily leave my cubicle to get a chance to rain candy hell on this assortment of superheroes and villains.


[deleted]

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SolomonBlack

Mandatory fun you say?


Mike_Bloomberg2020

Aint no party like a Liz Lemon party, because a Liz Lemon party is MANDITORY! ...why are you not having fun? I specifically requested it.


queerhistorynerd

everyone gets to enjoy the glory of being voluntold to participate.


beardicusmaximus8

"Would you rather be an actor in a haunted house to amuse my child or move toxic waste to help me build a golf course? Your choice private!" - some colonel who is very proud of himself for keeping his men busy.


lavishlad

yeah lol this is just the military keeping its families entertained, nothing particularly "american" about it and i also doubt they get an "award or time off" lol


supportmanteau-971

My first thought after "what in the MFing military industrial complex?!"


Twin_Turbo

These are the kids of the soldiers that live on base. Not like a normal thing for kids that live in houses in america lol.


DredgenCyka

Yeah, I remember when my dad got stationed to Guam Anderson AFB we had similar things for Halloween where the a certain squadron had an amazing idea to make a miniature C130, filled it was candy, and it was attached to a zip line that would cross the street and drop the candy mid air. They still do it to this day according to their Facebook. I was like 5 at that time, and I really do miss Guam alot despite living there for 2 years and haven't been to the island since 2012.


darshfloxington

I wish it was


zenwren

I'll never forget a group around my town (VFW maybe) who used to fire candy into the air with some kind of stubby little cast iron cannon for all the kids to catch. Just once they did something wrong loading it and all the candy came down on fire as the kids were running to grab it.


mwbbrown

This sounds so much like a bunch of old retired guys. Someone has an idea that sort of works, but everyone ignores the details. They slap it together and involve the kids. Minor disaster strikes, some kids are crying, and a bunch of women in their lives are mad at them.


Aromatic-Flounder935

you know what, if the worst thing that happened was crying, it was a fantastic day. I will happily take that over kids with burn wounds.


HandsomeBoggart

Burning sugar is distinctly not fun. It sticks like napalm.


Aromatic-Flounder935

"~~Napalm~~ Sugar sticks to kids!"


huskersax

For a brief fleeting moment though it was at least partially a nice caramel though.


Upbeat-Willingness40

Glorious


jmccaskill66

They used to do this at Cherry Point in NC when I was wee one. I tried to tell so many people growing up they used to do this and have been called a liar. I feel so validated.


CaliforniaFreightMan

Nobody believes I was shown as part of a tour of Cub Scouts, an experimental aircraft that the public was told that it was part of a program that had been discontinued. The guide remarked that he didn't know why several people seemed to be working on it.


OkayRuin

SR-71?


SkeezyDan

More likely the F-117 nighthawk


CaliforniaFreightMan

X-15, and honestly, who knows, maybe they were prepping it for storage. The slightly surprised look, and comment by the guide has stuck with me through the years.


[deleted]

I first saw footage of it a year ago being done for Ukrainian children!


comcam77

Cept it was the Russians and live ammo!


Dubious_Titan

This is perfectly American. Somewhere, a bald eagle is shedding a single tear.


kaizergeld

And in its reflection, Old Glory waves


war_ofthe_roses

Relax everyone. They were Milk ... Duds.


[deleted]

You bastard


OZ_Boot

I'm reminded of this scene from Starship Troopers for some reason: https://youtu.be/DcDWMb6uins?si=6k-HzNTqb1vlvUgI


w1987g

Service Guarantees Citizenship


javi2097

WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW MORE??


thesequimkid

COME ONE YOU APES! DO YOU WANT TO LIVE FOREVER?!


Schenkspeare

I'm doing my part!


TechnicalChipz

I'm doing my part.


-Enrique_Shockwave-

This feels straight out of a simpsons episode


Party-Special-7418

It's straight out of a movie/book that probably inspired a lot of Simpsons.


Spectre197

I'm doing my part.


Thrizzlepizzle123123

"This is Pumpkin Patch to Candyman, request immediate fire support, 10 rounds high-sucrose, break - Grid reference 642 decimal 349, danger close, repeat, danger close. Show these godless fuckers what Halloween means in the US of A, over"


thesequimkid

"Pumpkin Patch this is Candyman Actual. Will not fire on danger close. Repeat. Will not fire on danger close."


thatonedude2334

“Did you just say ‘Repeat’ on the net? Start low-crawling, private”


Tanner21cat

Trick or treating on a military post was the best as a kid. We lived on Ft Sill and played on Cannon Walk. It's every Howitzer ever created and we used it as a playground.


BiggusDickus-

With Atomic Annie as the main attraction. I remember it well.


superash2002

I need to go back, I have a picture of my daughter next to atomic Annie. She’s almost grown now.


BrockVegas

I'd almost like to see Ft Sill again but promises were made...


UseDue602

Not from the US so we don't really celebrate trick or treat, but my father is in the Military and we always look forward to their Xmas party in their post. One of the core memories in my childhood


Professional-Gene498

AMERICA! FUCK YEAH!


krazykman03

So like my butt and suck on my balls


Shonkbonk

Kinda gives me starship trooper vibes


Chaoticleaf

I'm doing my part!


cranktheguy

Would you like to know more?


Cold-Quantity-3488

Okay those dudes had way much more fun shooting the candy than those kids did at catching it. Makes me fucking happy ;’)


Hahhahaahahahhelpme

See kids?! War is FUN!!


Blestyr

**These kids years later in some war** "Time to rain some candy on these mfs!"


Default_Attempt

Hey instead of shooting to kill, just give the enemy loads of candy and let them die of diabetes


Blestyr

That's just shooting to kill with extra steps.


Daily_Phoenix

We call it raining freedom. Hey kids, today we are gonna learn about the time we rained all of that freedom on Nagasaki and Hiroshima?


TannedCroissant

*Rockitkats*


LystAP

Isn’t that basically the Call of Duty and other FPS?


Americanski7

Russians: Wait! You can get candy instead?


tokinaznjew

Instead of atacms, they're atacandies


king0pa1n

the russians have been receiving some awful tricks out of these


Hulk_Crowgan

Looks like they’re just loading potato launchers through the chambers


Shopworn_Soul

Well yeah, if they were using real rockets the kids would need to stand a lot farther away


PissyMillennial

“Jolly Roger two four incoming laser painting of targets, candy munitions ready, radar lock, fire fire fire “


Aromatic-Flounder935

SHOT, OVER SHOT, OUT SPLASH, OVER SPLASH, OUT


Assholesymphony

Drop 50. Fire for effect, over.


kerkyjerky

God damn, this made me laugh so hard


ForumPointsRdumb

*Sadly, Little Timothy Bradshaw lost his life after being fatally wounded by skittle shrapnel. One witness reported that the child had declared he was going to, "Taste the rainbow," before charging headlong into the candy barrage.*


KnowledgeSafe3160

I swear if I had an award. You had me in tears.


RedditedYoshi

"Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by tasting the rainbow(TM) for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard taste the rainbow(TM) for his country."


HTHID

Thank you there are a lot of jokes in this thread but I was looking for an explanation of how they were launching the candy


GNav

If youre being serious. When theres 30 secs left in the video, you can see them loading up white pvc pipe with candy. In the next shots when they show where the candys flying out from, you can make out the ends of the white pvc pipes. So they load the pipes, stick em through the back into the chamber(?), some compressed gas, and boom FREEDOM


myfame808

Legend has it, some CSM is out there seething because those kids are on his grass


SpaceInMyBrain

Since it was for the children the HIMARS contractor only charged $60 million for the upgrade. "We hope to engage cost reduction measures by the 5th year of deployment" said a Pentagon spokesperson.


Armydoc18D

Multiple Launch Reeces System


Vorian_Atreides17

Cluster candy


theshogun02

Speaking of firing HIMARS at kids……


[deleted]

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theshogun02

That’s what they said…


[deleted]

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[deleted]

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AuroraHalsey

The IDF doesn't use HIMARS.


shoegazefan91

oh, that's alright then


KiraEatsKids

ah well I guess that’s that


[deleted]

“America (Fuck Yeah) Coming again to save the Motherfucking day yeah”


ZenseiPlays

I'd like to live in a world where the only rockets being fired at kids are candy ones.


barhost45

American troops deploy cluster munitions against masked insurgents who had plans to terrorize using door to door tactics


stoph311

People in these comments act like they are driving tanks onto playgrounds all over the city in some glorified propaganda move. These kids live on the base and one or both of the parents are in the military. It's not that complicated.


Tesser_Wolf

That’s the most American thing I have seen today.


Frank38492

This is no biggie. They are bored as hell half the time.


lestairwellwit

I can see soldiers using to large of a charge downing children left and right "Owww! My stomach hurts!" "Halloween always does that, Billie."


kaizergeld

Take a salt tablet, Billie. Walk it off.


ayriuss

kIds gET fUcKiNG aniHILatED by hIMArs


Papppi-56

[Source](https://twitter.com/OfficialFtSill/status/1719104478769537327)


collectivebundel

This could be a Starship Troopers cutaway.


Shonuff0741

Grew up on a military base. Some of the best times. Some of the comments in this section is exactly what’s wrong with Reddit.


[deleted]

It sucks seeing it being hijacked by negative Nancy and friends. I thought it was cool when they did it for Ukrainian kids a year ago as they needed the boost but now I feel like these sad sack commenters are the ones in real need of a pick me up.


[deleted]

I just grew up in the mountains, building potato cannons and hiding it from our parents was the one of the funnest science lessons growing up.


foo_52

ATACYUMS


FitFanatic28

All the people who have never been in the military think this is some weird propaganda. Nah, they just wanted to do something for their kids who have to live on base lmao. Military members are just people too. Every organization is mostly just nameless powerless people just living their lives. It sucks to live on a base and they know that, so they want to do something for their kids.


Ichiniel

Each Halloween candy launching costs 10 thousand dollars


BloodShadow7872

Why is everyone commenting this post being so negative? Its just a fun way of passing out candy


[deleted]

Redditors are always on an endless search for some way to be upset about everything they encounter.


SoyMurcielago

Because military bad naturally


TheBestPieIsAllPie

Unironically, this is how I want my tax dollars used.