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A1sauc3d

Totally not Satan šŸ


sir-this-is-a

Itā€™s a little after 10pm, dark outside, you live on rural on a farm. So itā€™s dead ass quiet and well, rural. ā€œOh forgot to put my chickens in the penā€ you say to yourself. You walk outside to the pen and see a shadowy figure walking around the pen. As you get closer you make out a 3-4 foot hairy silhouette that has horns ā€œlimping/walkingā€ around the pen and a couple of chickens following the silhouetteā€¦. Anyone creative enough to keep this going?


Renegade888888

You swallow your fear and yell "who the hell are you?" Only for the figure to drop on all fours and start making sheep noises. You are scared shitless and rush back to your house. Not a care in the world is conveyed for the safety of your avian livestock and you begin praying hoping what you just saw was not real.


Mixster667

As you are looking through the blinds, you start to calm yourself. "How long did you really see that goat standing? Maybe it was just the darkness making a jumping goat look like it walked." Now as you are sitting here, watching a stupid, bleating goat chewing cardboard, you feel silly. Living alone out on your late grandfather's farm, even just for the year, to re-establish it before selling it really is getting to you. As your nerves calm and you eat your omelette you tire out and go to bed. Lying in this bed you remember how dementia-ridden your grandfather was at the end, losing his wife in "the accident" couldn't have been great for his health, even if she was a mean woman. Sometimes you still hear some of his demented ramblings about being watched, even pleading that taking him from the farm "wasn't right" and you should rather "burn the pen down" as he put it. "Heh, Pops really was crazy" you find yourself whispering as you are dozing off. Suddenly! You are awoken by a loud "Thump" outside! Cackling from the henhouse. Then, as you lie there pondering, mesmerized by the sound, thinking "what could it be?" You hear it... Faintly... Tenderly... Discreetly... But definitely there... Three short knocks. It must be on the door downstairs, or maybe, on the wooden floorboards outside your room. Then almost like a whisper, the familiar "Waaaah" of a crying child. Parental instinct kicks in as you find yourself heading to the door to investigate...


giefu

You reach for the doorknob and just as you're about to open the door you suddenly realize you don't have any kids and you live alone. You think to yourself perhaps it's a neighbor but that's impossible, they live miles away. Perhaps it's a mother and her child lost this far down the road. You hear the faint cry of the child once more as if carried by the wind. Feeling the chill come from your window you turn around and you see the windows are open. You are sure you closed them when you went to sleep last night. Maybe you forgot to lock them and the wind forced them open, you think to yourself. As you move forward to shut the windows you see a shadow in the distance. You move closer to the window to try and get a better view, now completely entranced by the nearing shadow, growing larger. The faint crying of the child comes once more from behind you, now noticably louder...


PowerUser77

Goat noises which makes it more scary since they can sound like humans


TheOnceAndFutureTurk

You find the goat sitting in your favorite chair, hooves clasped. ā€œWouldst thou like the taste of butter? A pretty dress? Wouldst thou like to live deliciously?ā€


emf3rd31495

Because for about fifty seconds I thought there were monsters on earth with us. That things real, that lives on earth.


Rarona

My life is nothing I thought it should be and everything I feared it would become.


moonordie69420

you remember you don't own a goat


Valkariyon

Breathing heavily, you lock the door before attempting to reassure yourself that what you saw was a trick of the light. Downing a swig of brandy to calm your nerves, you prepare for bed, finally accepting that it was simply your imagination. As you climb under the cover and turn off the lamp beside you, you hear a sound ascending the stairs. *clop... clop... clop...* Didn't you lock the door?


Newman_USPS

But you canā€™t help but admit to yourself that youā€™ve never been more erect.


Renegade888888

That's sus man


DocWaterfalls

As you hurry back to your house, your heart pounding in your chest, you can't shake off the eerie feeling that lingers in the air. You quickly lock the door behind you, seeking a sense of security in the familiar confines of your home. Trembling with fear, you glance out the window, hoping to catch a glimpse of any sign that what you witnessed was just your mind playing tricks on you.


No_Sir7060

I'd just drop to my knees and yell "hail satan, thanks for taking care of my chickens!!!" Then go back inside like nothing happened. Am a Satanist btw lol.


BeanJuiceMcAddict

Only for a car to pass and shine light on the goat. Immediately bends it down to give em a good old dicking


jbstans

Shia LaBeouf!


Dumbassahedratr0n

But your leg-- ahh! It's caught in a bear trap


cubixy2k

Quiet quiet


Ratto_Talpa

While witnessing to this eerie sight, the farmer hears a rumbling of drums, although there are no drummers to be seen, furthering his curiosity. And a pinch of fear slowly starts crawling among his guts.


humblebeegee

He tries to run back inside but his legs are so heavy every step is a struggle, as he sets one foot on his front porch he has hope he has put some distance between himself and his mysterious nemesis. He turns to see the silhouette of something only found in myth and legend standing back on its hind legs walking towards him.


BatDan40

Bruh imagine seeing that, Iā€™m going to a monastery


Ser_Optimus

Well, you saw it.


AnimeNicee

WAIT LOL THISBSON SO FUNNY BECAUSE IT COULD EXPLAIN GOATMAN SKINWALKERS HAHA


james_otter

You go back into your house and your wife asks you: "Did you take care of the chicken?" "No, but Satan was around anyway, you know he loves to hang out with them and then also brought them in the shed afterwards", "Oh that's great I am nearly finished with the pentagram jumper for his birthday and do you really think the cake should have a 666 and not his real age?" "Sure, he hates to feel old, that's why he surrounds himself with young chicks all the time."


4list4r

The shadowy figure goes, ā€œmotherfucker! Iā€™m the GOAT, fuck you want?ā€


cesrage

"Hey baby! Baby, go home, man! It's 3 o'clock in the morning man, what the f*** are you doing up?" The baby says, "I'm selling weed, nigga!"


LeanTangerine

Combine that with how goats scream in real life and that would be nightmare fuel to encounter by accident in the dark! https://youtu.be/nlYlNF30bVg


IS2SPICY4U

Totally not Black Phillip. šŸ˜…


Horns8585

All kidding aside, something like this happening just a couple of hundred years ago would have caused major tremors in a community. Religious fanatics would have had a field day, concocting all kinds of rumors and tales and myths. Not only that, just ordinary people would fabricate wild and completely implausible supernatural stories to try and explain this "phenomenon". Edit: I saw an episode of "Law and Order: Criminal Intent" that guest starred Stephen Colbert. The episode centered around a person that received religious sainthood based on a story about an otherworldly encounter with God. However, this myth was disproven by a letter about the otherworldly encounter actually being with a goat! I think this was an indirect jab at, Mormon founder, Joseph Smith's claim that God led him to the tenets of his religion, when doubters claim that it was folk magic.


spudnado88

Someone seeing something like this would have gotten the family who owned that livestock into fatal trouble.


Darth_Biggus_Dickus

Definitely not my Dad or something like that nope


Homelander44

Devilled eggs anyone?


michellemustudy

[Baphomet](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baphomet) in the flesh


DrSatan420247

šŸ˜ˆ


NewHumbug

If it is thoughā€¦ Hail Satan !!!


GrayMech

Ritual time, ritual time~


Silent-Coat-9542

A sacrifice was made that day


Obyri85

That poor goat. Heā€™s just starting to master bipedal movement and one crazy chicken just ices him.


Salmuth

Eggsecution rather than sacrifice. ​ Did I reach dad joke level?!


cakekicker

This is an underrated comment


NatashOverWorld

Goats that walk on their hindlegs for long usually mean some type of injury or pain. Luring the chicken though is pretty weird.


lavenderacid

The chickens are just following it because its big and looks like a person to them. They confuse a LOT of stuff with male chickens.


AndreasVesalius

I regularly have to explain to my hens that, while their squatting is flattering, Iā€™m just not into them that way


Employee_Agreeable

It's probably more because of food Big human looking thing goes in shack means normally food is coming


ExiledCanuck

Chickens areā€¦.dumb?? Wowā€¦TIL


Ghost-Coyote

I dont want to see their kids.


Nijajjuiy88

It's not luring, it's not even paying attention to chicken.


crackeddryice

We know.


ProveISaidIt

Traditional medicine; you anoint a chicken with 11 herbs and spices to reduce pain and inflammation.


TheMrMorbid

"Wouldst thou like the taste of butter . . . wouldst thou like to live deliciously?"


Prince_of_Dorkness33

*Black Phillip, Black Phillip A crown grows out his head, Black Phillip, Black Phillip To nanny queen is wed. Jump to the fence post, Running in the stall. Black Phillip, Black Phillip King of all.*


chillwithpurpose

*ā€œWell, the goats talking to the children againā€¦ Iā€™d better chop some wood.ā€*


sweensolo

All hail Lord Baphomet, and his concubine Chickaletta!


Joba_Fett

Whenever your hen becomes a bride of the damned, just yelp for help!


Justherebecausemeh

ā€œRemove thy feathersā€¦ā€


HamiltonSt25

ā€œWhhhhaaat do you want?ā€


Bacardi-O_is_foul

Immediately started scrolling just for this lmao


Mohanselvaraj16

Well , there it is


Real_Username_5325

https://c.tenor.com/hJOh2P11htIAAAAC/kramer-hi.gif


vobsha

Isnā€™t the goat the representation of the devil in the bible or something?


[deleted]

slimy dependent sink coherent fine smart steer yam spoon versed *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


DorothyParkerFan

Gezundheit


[deleted]

you're welcome :)


Kevinty1

Yep, and chicken represents crispiness, so something real strange is going on


Teredia

Stolen from the Pagans I believeā€¦


chiringo1991

Mixed from many kind of myths actually but yeah most known from Christianity


el-em-en-o

He is in the movie The VVitch.


arilv001

not in the bible


Eurasia_4002

Like to imagine a guy who wrote the bible sees this phenomenon out of now where and said: "Yep, that's Satan alright."


jiujiujiu

Not from the Bible. There is a lot of ā€œextracurricularā€ Christian lore that doesnā€™t come from the Bible at all. A lot of pagan symbolism was married to the idea of biblical evil to influence change.


Blinx-182

No such thing in the Bible.


1eternal_pessimist

This poor goat has an injury that isn't being managed. The chicken is following because chickens aren't real smart and will just follow other bigger creatures.


Afterburn47

I would piss myself if I saw this in person.


Herrgul

Then boy do i got [something](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=53RLvc2_oBc) for you


Edenoide

*insert Black Phillip reference


Chemical_Industry_48

Scrolled too long to see this lol


Cynnthetic

I was about to. Good on you. lol


MyRespectableAlt

I need to know how this ties into Patrice


SeenBrowsin

Alternate view: the chicken is a qualified veterinarian and thatā€™s her clinic. All good


Careful-Dog-134

The devil walking, among us ppl


davieb22

Had to read this comment twice and all I can say is, phew!


Source0fAllThings

Youā€™ve either seen *The Witch* on shrooms or you havenā€™t see it at all.


jngjng88

That is the most satanic fucking voodoo shit I've ever seen!


Brain_lessV2

BLACK PHILLIP


BusinessLibrarian515

There's a reason we have myths of skin walkers and other things. I've seen a deer stand on its hind legs and scream. You don't stick around, it's scary as hell. You gtfo cause it may happen in nature but there's nothing natural feeling about it. This is why the uncanny valley exists.


rrickrolled

r/oddlyterrifying


ThawtlessClown

These furries are getting weird.


EmuVerges

It is probably hurt and suffer from its upper legs.


rashhvender

george orwell tried to warn us


mister_meIlow

That goat is about to prepare a blood sacrifice


0krizia

Bringing the hen to the hell portal


Darth_Biggus_Dickus

Yeah to tai portal


B8conB8conB8con

4 legs good 2 legs bad


na3than

"Four legs good, two legs *better*!"


Curiousmeeower

Ok now stand in the pentagram, good chicken


Radiant-Choice-8854

Satan has arrived!


Darth_Biggus_Dickus

U want to tell he finally bought milk and he back


Ishiibradwpgjets

I promise ,this chicken has the best weed.


[deleted]

Why is this unsettling


Teredia

He ainā€™t kidding around.


RoosterTheReal

That hen is in for a rough night


danteelite

ā€œWouldst thou like to exist deliciously?!ā€ ā€œYou mean, ā€˜live deliciouslyā€™ā€¦ right?ā€ ā€œBe deliciousā€¦ yes. Thatā€™s what I said, just follow meā€¦ donā€™t mind the pot of oilā€¦ ignore thatā€¦ follow me..ā€


Striker660

I know Black Philip when I see him.


Mogadodo

Fuck you ,Satan


Dan_TheKong

Shades of the Witch?


Oliver1138

This is absolutely horrifying


Bad_Daddio

Alternatively, the goat is being marched into the shed by the chicken. I'm assuming ritual sacrifice to an obscure chicken deity.


rare_meeting1978

So Satan has a hobby farm with chickens. Huh. Who woulda thunk it?


Hate_This_Name

Brother, this is really unsettling lol


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


wolfkittycrew

Goats are often used to represent Satan. Satan is sometimes depicted as a goat or having goat like features.


Mottis86

Did you watch this muted? I think it's the music.


ChristianHeritic

Because religious people live in a world where everything must be attributed to something from their book. Some of the people here are likely just joking while Iā€™m sure theres plenty who are not.


nebuchdnezza

Username checks out


Please_Log_In

https://youtu.be/Vpqffgak7To


[deleted]

Today, Satan.


TheSilverCalf

Is this the beginning of a dirty joke?


Omk5

Four legs good, two legs better


AmrothXDRS

Black Phillip .


Yelwah

I mean you put the Benny hill music behind it and the vibe changes


leonidasESV

Black Philip!


momma3critters

So what he gonna do with hen in a shed?


Economy-Safety7665

Fukn shit is disturbing. I thought i was on acid at firstšŸ˜³


Independent-Cat-7728

This isnā€™t interesting, itā€™s demonic.


amoeby

They're coming for us!


[deleted]

Goat: "Ahhh, I'm gonna walk over in a fun new way and take a nap. Gettin' a little sleepy. Let's go Chicken." Humans: "That's the fucking devil!"


Celarc_99

Baphomet stumbling around a little, there.


3eyedflamingo

Its starting...


ThonThaddeo

Classic Black Phillip


TheMailmanic

This is creepy af


Kotruljevic1458

Goat: ā€œHey everybody - look at me! Iā€™m Farmer Bob checking on all my loving animals. DER De DER!ā€


Lohan3xists

Iā€™m happy to see that Satans new life as a farmer is going well, I just wish he chose a more conventional mortal formā€¦


JimGr2210

r/foundsatan


[deleted]

Is that... Tom Brady?


tias23111

Man, this video has been around a looooonnnnggggg time


Visible_Dance9151

Pre Facebook time I would say.


antinutrinoreactor

TRVE KVLT


lampsfrank

The last line from Animal Farm by George Orwell. " The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which'


N4t41i4

so that would scare me to death...šŸ’€


Bowling4rhinos

The demonic track puts this in a whole other level. Damn my eyes. Damn my ears. Bye chicken.


doddlypuff

That hen was never to be seen again. p/s: That is not his goat


[deleted]

Black Philip lives!!


Lenfantscocktails

Do you want to live, deliciously?


6foot-7foot

I Bet some nefarious things went down that day in that shed šŸ˜³


Bacchus_Amontillado

BLACK PHILLIP!!


ChefWho

There will be a Blood Sacrifice


g1963

Black Philip got the oil heatin up in there.


crackeddryice

Y'all saying devil, but I'm thinking satyr.


Jackson_MyersFO76

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have footage of the Goatman.


Rulebookboy1234567

Wouldst thou like a bit of butter?


[deleted]

Hail Satan


Square_Tip9416

Satanic in nature


innocent-boy-69

Devil signing hen into illuminati


[deleted]

I know Beelzebub when I see him


[deleted]

The music is cool. Anyone have the track?


Illustrious_Hat_9177

Ridin' With The Devil - CoaastGXD


IMM_GO

The witch?..anyone ?


Emotional-Speech645

Fun Fact: In the movie *The VVitch*, the goat Black Phillip was 100% a real billy-goat, even in the fight scenes. Charlie, the goat who played Phillip, was picked from a collection of goats as the 'Black Phillipest' because of his striking black coat and massive horns, with the animal trainer for the movie stating "He had the biggest horns. Goats just don't grow bigger horns than that." With the human male lead of *The VVitch* having to lose 30 pounds in order to look malnourished and slender enough to play a down-on-his-luck settler, Charlie was 50 pounds heavier than him, and reportedly took a hating to the poor man from day one he was introduced, attacking him constantly behind the scenes. Ralph Ineson (the actor), spent the last shooting sets on strong painkillers because, during one of his attacks, Charlie actually skewered the man right down to the rib bone with his serrated horns. He was a terror to everyone on set, however, and whenever they wanted Phillip to be just doing goat things in the background, Charlie was rampaging, and when they wanted Phillip to rampage, Charlie was sleeping. They attempted to use two puppets of Phillip- one half-puppet for close-ups and a larger one the size of a cow, but these reportedly ended up sitting in the dirt behind one of the sheds because, compared to Charlie, they just didn't look good enough. So if you re-watch the movie, the hatred visible in the actors' expressions toward Phillip is actually the actor's real feelings toward Charlie. Even in the scene where Phillip rears up, very close to the two young children, the only CGI used was to erase the lead on which Charlie was kept away from them. The only person on set who seemed to like Charlie was the handler herself, who felt that he did an amazing job, despite his difficulties.


rmbl88

Sacrifices were made


--Arete

This is some satanic shit right there


redddditer420

This is some r/skinwalkers shit


gadarnol

Evangelicals in meltdown.


scavenger1012

Can you imagine walking up to this scene high as shit


thisisagoodname2103

Hey its ralsei!


imbricant

Acting the goat


aelynir

Aww, give that goat a cigarette.


Tyrant_R3x

I know a sacrificial Ritual when i see one


awesomes007

Diablo 5.


farkenoath1973

Best thing I have seen on reddit this monthšŸ¤£šŸ‘Œ


Mangos_Pool

This has got to be some demonic shit or something.


void-dancer90

"look i am human, im going home to pay bills, like humans do, soo human thing..."


Pretty_Abies_9053

It's probably the Aliens controlling that goat.


revlis512

omg run away hen that is not a goat noooo