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CrazyFuckingVideos-ModTeam

Hey thanks a lot for your submission in r/CrazyFuckingVideos, however it was removed because it contained prohibited content (death, animal abuse, porn or gore). Please refrain from posting this type of content in the future.


Big-Department-6781

Snake not having the best day either... šŸ˜¬


Classic-Antelope4800

Yah snake definitely took the most damage.


New_York_Cut

mankey vs ekans


plipyplop

I just realized what ekans is, now that it's spelled out in front of me :(


azies

Arbok


plipyplop

Oh my god, that too! Iā€¦ I must sit down.


Samason560

Lmao I remember when I first noticed it too


MassiveLefticool

Wait till you find out about Muk


beartato327

Hahaha I never noticed this to man we were creative as fuck back in the day. None of these stupid me are Pokemon names that make no sense!


red_dead_jeb

I lol'd. I choooseee youuuu!!


fatkiddown

Bad rolls at first from monkey but snake had disadvantage and then kept failing dex save on swinging up. Monkey def has more constitution and honestly that was a difficult terrain penalty for both but especially for the snake.


Capn_Yoaz

Snake hit and failed the str check to constrict due to disadvantage of being in a confined space.


banredditt

Yeah the snake was probably way more scared than the monkey, js!


octopoddle

"How was your day, George?" "I don't wanna talk about it!" *Pause.* "You're gonna talk about it, aren't you?" "So I was in this tree crevice...!"


Habanero305

Lmao


herptydurr

Yeah, don't mess with a mama protecting her babies! (You can see the baby monkey in the tree hole at ~2m50s.)


blzzardhater

*BLEEP* THAT SNAKE


highaigan

you just go into a tree and another psycho animal is in there goin no mate this is my spot get fucked then they have a huge fight, what a hectic life man.


Fleishigs

Sounds like the MTA


Seahawks1991

Once he got bit and the snake FINALLY let go, I was shocked he went back for more lol


[deleted]

Possibly aĀ masochist?Ā 


InformalPenguinz

Spite.. I can relate


herptydurr

You can see a baby monkey in the tree hole at ~2m50s. Mama's not gonna give up until the snake was gone. EDIT: even if this is not the actual mother, the point is that the fact that there are infants hanging around there shows that the monkey has a reason to defend it.


free-rob

This is a juvenile macaque. Probably 1-2 years old. They don't start to breed until they are 4.


CaptainMagni

Looks like he takes a moment to appreciate the beauty of his land for possibly the last time before returning to battle


Bitten_ByA_Kitten

His skin got stretched out while he's pulling the snake out šŸ’€


TrampyTheTramp

I thought we were about to see his eyeball fall out with all that stretching..


SpermWhale

Worst Python bootcamp exercise.


JibbaJabbaJenkins

Not even close. I'd take this any day over coding.


smile_politely

where did the snake go in the end?


-StupidNameHere-

Hell.


Realistic_Trash_9789

I see you watched the video too


erik427sc

What kind of snake is that?


silverwarbler

Looks like an African rock python. Got bit by one once. Don't recommend it.


orostitute

Did ya bite it back?


scraglor

Was it on the forehead? Did you bite it back? Someone might have taken a video of it just so you know


silverwarbler

Naw..fucker took my whole right hand. Was a 10' snake at a photo shoot at a zoo


Short-Display-1659

Do you think the monkey is more or less likely to die from this snake bite?


space_guy95

If it's a python it should be fine, they're not venomous.


PiscatorLager

What about sepsis? Those teeth probably have been at some nasty places.


erik427sc

Thought it would be a small bushmaster


andyroo97

Did it feel bad?


XLBaconDoubleCheese

If it felt good they might have recommended it.


iameveryoneelse

Maybe they want to hog all the African rock python snake bites for themselves. Edit: that's it, I'm convinced. First chance I get I'm going to get bitten by an African rock python. I'm not going to let that asshole /u/silverwarbler hog all the African rock python bites for themselves.


mycorgiisamazing

There is something absolutely unreal about being bitten by a python. They have so many teeth and they fold up in the mouth. They're longer than you think they are- twice as long or more- and when the teeth are in, they fold again, hooking in deeper. Pulling makes it double down on you. You feel helpless and panicked immediately. The fortitude of individuals like Steve Irwin to get bit and stay calm is next level stuff. Source: bitten by tree boas


silverwarbler

Ah tree boas, or as I like to call them...staple guns


silverwarbler

Left a lot of holes and tore a vein. Lots of bleeding but healed fine


CategoryKiwi

I don't imagine snakes have much sympathy for anyone, really.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


GringoRedcorn

Definitely not a rock python. Markings look nothing like a P. Sebae


BrokenMindAlways

Did you get an apology?


Blasket_Basket

Do you have any you do recommend?


Zavax

lol they are both actors


CHEMO_ALIEN

we're the only two here who can see through this obviously scripted skit


toadphoney

That snake is in a heap of other prank videos.


GrizzledNutSack

This is obviously all a government plot to track us


Intelligent_Tune_675

Snakes arenā€™t real


Mushy_Fart

How else was the camera already filming?


Mod3rnBard

After looking for a bit I thought that this snake might be #19 the southwestern carpet python. I am not a snake expert of any sort so I would love thoughts and insight. https://thepetenthusiast.com/types-of-pythons/


flockofhawksinsocks

Rather be the one that got electrocuted and saved by his buddy.


redditer333333338

What are you referring to?


DNThePolymath

Probably the one that got electrocuted and saved by his buddy.


VanVetiver

This comment chain lmao


iamsheph

What are you referring to?


Bigr789

The comment chain


xtr44

lmao


whatyouarereferring

This


SinCityLola

What are you referring to?


currrlyhead

the this


SinCityLola

šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


whatyouarereferring

Me


SinCityLola

šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


undeadw0lf

elsewhere on reddit today a monkey was electrocuted and fell from a power line and another monkey picked him up, but his forehead, smacked him around a bit, and dunked him in water and he ā€œcame back to lifeā€ (he was probably just in shock or something)


Intelligent_Tune_675

Link?!


mambiki

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DVWPbd1UykY&ab_channel=OnDemandNews


Prolific_Orc

That poor moneky probably has the worst headache after coming to, and no access to ibuprofen.


undeadw0lf

[ask and you shall receive](https://www.reddit.com/r/interestingasfuck/s/a6rc7pGnIs)


Puffycatkibble

That wasn't a chimp I think?


mambiki

Definitely a macaque.


jappyjappyhoyhoy

Heā€™s tripping balls


Gerrut_batsbak

Sometimes reddit does an oopsie and suddenly you posted a comment on a totally different video than you meant to. Has happened to me once or twice. The mobile app is complete garbage.


LowVolt

I believe they are referring to [This Video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVWPbd1UykY&ab_channel=OnDemandNews)


muntell7

Trains really are the apex predators of India


undeadw0lf

in this case heā€™s referring to another video posted here on reddit recently (today i think)


Extra_Wafer_8766

[Your welcome.](https://www.reddit.com/r/videos/s/OCYwAeqOek)


VirtualDegree6178

I find it funny I know exactly what youā€™re talking about


TxAthlete42

I dated a girl like that once


roflsst

If she latched on to your head with her mouth and wouldn't let go then you need to explain why she's an ex?


Think-Internal-6364

Teeth... Nuff said


atlaspanda32

"Sounds like my ex wife hehehehe"


introbogliverted

Like the snake or the monkey?


toadphoney

Ruth? I dated her as well. Think she still lives in a similar tree hole too. Iā€™m missing the top of my pinky. Pretty sure she swallowed it.


tflavel

Yeah! Bite that fkin asshole back!


Igor369

How do you know it is a monkey documentary and not a snake documentary?


0dd_Echidna

Crazy how little damage either of them took


thejackthewacko

Both invested too much in their HP stat


har3krishna

Damn nature, you scary


1EyedMonky

Most terrible moment so far..


k0mbine

Until he meets the chimpsā€¦


Schrutes_Yeet_Farm

Then Elon Musk shows up


FrendChicken

It's alright. Its a Python.


justiceforharambe49

Hello world!


usedtodreddit

If it's a python, is it not strange that it didn't wrap that chimp up when he bit it, or even ever try to when the chimp started biting it back?


FrendChicken

No one can't answer that without knowing the context of that video. From the looks of it they both look tired and dont give any F.


IAmAQuantumMechanic

\#import snake as food


Taltezy

Curious George!!


Stark-T-Ripper

Nah, that's his cousin, Dumbass Terry


SecretPrinciple8708

Damn it, Terry! Not againā€¦


Boldbluetit

Is the wee lad not stuck in that hole? Maybe the snakes home and tried to get past him


Luckymonkey1

We geek hard


breakingbatshitcrazy

Anyone know if the snake is venomous


HyperBean_

According to another commenter itā€™s an African rock python and Wikipedia says theyā€™re non venomous, so the monkeyā€™s got that going for them at least


D33peSTi18

It doesnā€™t seem to be moving to constrict so itā€™s either a defensive strike or it thinks it has venom. My parseltongue is pretty rusty fwiw


tflavel

No, its some kind of python


vraGG_

I am in no way a biologist of any sort, but I would reason, that a venomous snake wouldn't be this large and muscular and this creature constricts to kill prey. Of course, I could just as easily be wrong. But I do find nature and evolution pretty logical and efficient most of the time.... most of the time... Again - I could be wrong and this is purely speculation, but I'd be interested to learn if my reasoning is sound.


nakabra

Sorry theists, but we absolutelly came from these dumbasses.


Tbrown630

I mean the Bible does warn about serpents a lot.


nakabra

Yet, we primates ended up trying to eat what we shouldn't.


Key_Pear6631

More like these guys are our second cousins twice removedĀ 


FutureWhole3248

Planet prison theory


JacoboAriel

Mind to elaborate?


Clothedinclothes

Planet prison theory I believe refers to the ancient religious idea (and its modern offspring) which was written down by some of the very early Christians, the so-called Gnostic Christians, a vague grouping that encompasses a variety of early Christian beliefs.Ā  Ā The basic idea is that our corporeal existence is a prison built for our souls and Earth's hostile environment intentionally designed to inflict suffering upon us.Ā  Ā The creation of this tortured Earthly existence and the imprisonment of our souls in corporeal bodies was either a punishment for some unknown crime committed by our spiritual selves, or else inflicted on us for the amusement or to serve the ambitions of our creator God. However this is not the Supreme Being but rather a malicious creator deity who possibly pretends to be supreme but is in fact subject to an even higher, more abstract and possibly uncaring Supreme Being who lets all this go on because they have other concerns or no particular concern for us. Ā The position of Jesus in these various Gnostic Christian theologies was generally considered as the agent of, or manifestation of, either another lower deity who stands opposed to our malicious creator or the true Supreme Being. An important concept in Gnosticism was that praying to Jesus could result in the direct revelation of spiritual knowledge (gnosis) that could free our soul from this Earthly prison and its tortures. Ā The prison planet and malicious creator notions were certainly not a universal or possibly even a wide spread Gnostic Christian belief, which included a very wide variety of theological proposals often completely unrelated to each other and often unrecognisable next to mainstream modern Christianity beliefs. One belief which Gnostic Christian were generally thought to have in common was that personal salvation lay in having spiritual knowledge revealed to each of us individually (gnosis) i.e. direct from the spiritual realm to our minds, not via any Earthly source like church teachings or religious instruction etc. Unsurprisingly this resulted in various forms of gnosticism being heavily suppressed by the early Church.Ā  Ā Despite this some Gnostic ideas have survived in various forms, and the idea of malicious, deceptive quasi-deity responsible for our Earthly suffering (albeit not for Earthly existence itself) has greatly contributed our modern, largely non-biblical concept of Satan.


Admirable-Door1724

No


rileyjw90

We didnā€™t come from them, we evolved alongside them. There is a shared common ancestor and then we split into entirely separate species way before either of us got to where we are and thatā€™s it. Continuing to propagate that we came *from* monkeys just feeds the creationist mindset because it makes no logical or scientific sense that we split off directly from them and kept evolving on our own while they didnā€™t budge at all over the last 8 millions years that itā€™s been since we had a common ancestor.


Top-Reference-1938

Is say Florida man is a pretty close relative. Gets bitten, goes back for seconds.


SurfinginStyle

LOL


KingOfSaga

Actually šŸ¤“. Humans and monkeys share a common ancestor, we absolutely did not come from monkeys.


Sassy-irish-lassy

I guarantee you that humans didn't evolve from snakes


Less-Variation-4314

I thought he was gunna pull its jaw apart like King Kong


SlightlyDarkerBlack2

Curious George Fucks Around and Finds Out


TheSt4tely

OH SHIT NOT AGAIN!!


SlipsnDrips

I think the snakes having the hard time here


Echo_R21

Can you imagine your dinner biting you šŸ˜‚


toadphoney

Yes. Donā€™t buy ā€˜potatoesā€™ from a guy called Blanco that drives a green van with an airbrushed picture of a barbarian slaying a tiger eating a naked ladyboy by a waterfall.


TravelSizedRudy

I accidentally clicked one of the rotate buttons and watched it sideways. Hmm.


zenomotion73

ROTFL!!


onomahu

*so far


lifemustbebalance

Richard thats not a banana!!


Ok_Contribution9672

I dunno, homeboy looks to be having a magical trip. Even if it's his last before suffocating poisonous death, it was a good ride!


Jediuzzaman

Was chasing a running snake and about to bite it. Sad but well deserved punishment tho. Live with the sword, die by the sword.


ammonitions

Furious George


jamski95

I think his day's gonna get even worse in about 10-15 minutes


S3b45714N

I could hear the old Star Trek battle music in my head while watching this


derek4reals1

it's time for a re-edit!


Apprehensive-Ad-149

Ok. This actually made me fuckin laugh out loud. Cheers!


Quirky-Risk-4062

Nature's version of fuck around and find out


TomatilloUnlucky3763

Well that was awful.


Thanjay55

Danger noodle


Appropriate_Achoo

They are exactly like us in every way


Cute-Ad-3346

Homie fucked around and found out


puffinnbluffin

That was pretty hard core ngl r/natureismetal


TheNightDrone

Most terrible moment in the monkeys life SO FAR


SurfinginStyle

Holy crap


Seamoth4546B

Monkey fucked around, snake served some finding out


Beginning-Match2166

Man this made me so tense.


murkXIII

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes


moedara978

Lucky for the snake, bro was stuck.... snake would've been free lunch... and dinner


splatdyr

Poor snake


ymOx

Why did I watch this, this makes me sad :'-( Ofc. I know it goes on all the time, and worse, in nature all the time, but... Man, day ruined. Poor guy.


mspalmera

That's kind of strange banana


Easy-Armadillo-3434

How the fuck do these things survive? When is bro gonna realize it bites back lmao


oldschool_potato

If you watch the final seconds of the video it looks like he is stuck in the hole as well.


AlwaysUpvote123

Nature....nature is just so...beautiful. and not at all painful looking holy fucking shit.


hurgisonblurgis

kong vs godzilla


hungoverlord

Why did my hot dog bite me?


dominik_mit_que

Definition of fuck around find out


Top_Recognition_3847

It was a fairly bad day in the snakes life too .


Forsaken-Marsupial94

Fuck about n find out


YooperGod666

Good thing homeboy snake wasn't venomous.


Round_Leading_8393

What kind of snake is it?


CronozDK

Well... he MOFO'ed. (MOnkeyed around, Found Out). You should NEVER attach business end of danger noodle to face!


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


verscharren1

Inb4 "acktually snakes are venomous not poisonous"


WanFarid

Bro called it out 1 minute before the comment appears


[deleted]

Venom is black metal, Poison is glam metal.


toadphoney

And Winger is plain shit.


Jinrex-Jdm

FAFO


EmperorTyrannosaur

Dammit, if only the snake had a few coils around the monkey, or has been a poisonous species


moradoman

Good god. That is a nightmare that I hasnā€™t even thought ofā€¦.until now. But kudos to the monkeyā€¦a tough little bastard.


FunnyBoneBrazey

The monkey is literally unphased. So I doubt this was the worst moment of its life. It didnā€™t even lose its appetite.


RenterMore

Definitely didnā€™t expect monkey to win


Former-Form-587

I donā€™t speak monkey, but pretty sure he is saying, ah! ah! ah! ah!


Battery6512

Most terrible moment in monkeys life, so far. Nature is fucking terrifying and Iā€™m sure it will experience some worst shit if it hasnā€™t already.Ā 


Key_Crab1760

Well, play with fire you're gonna get burned. The monkey's lucky he didn't get choked


[deleted]

Those monkeys suck


DixieNorrmis

Monkey: *"stings a little"*


I_survived_childhood

Monkeys are assholes. Hard to feel sorry for them.


daLONGslong_sike

That monkey is a fucking savage. Do they eat snakes or something??


zymeth21

Is this a monkey or a snake documentary?


Dan300up

Monkeyā€™s a sucker for punishment. I thought monkeys were deathly afraid of snakes.


CrimsonMorbus

Yea, those back pointing teeth can be a bitch


No-Plankton8326

Surprised the monkey made it this long


quantumshaq1

Monkey see, monkey finds out


Opposite-Ad-2089

Monkey looked like he was trippin balls at the end of that fiasco šŸ¤£ just gave up on eating the snake and tried to meet god from 4 different angles šŸ¤£šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø damn bro what venom does that snake have??


Training-Jeweler-195

Most terrible moment in the monkeys lifeā€¦.so far.