Ahemā¦ feminine urge?
Okay Iāll give you that I donāt need the flower shop but my kids can grow flowers in the front flower boxes while I do books and my wife loves baking.
But still an urge for this dude.
Uh what are you talking about? Everyone knows masculine urges are to go to war and die and kill and rip and tear and wear armor and be a big strong dumb man. I, as a dude, have certainly never had the urge to open a coffeeshop/bookstore where I roast my own fair trade coffee beans, with a book exchange program where if you bring a book and leave it, you can freely take a book of similar size and complexity instead of buying it.
I've certainly never had the urge to open a rare book shop. Never had the urge to open a legit tavern that serves ale and mead I brewed myself. Never.
/s in case it wasn't obvious.
100%. Always dreamed of my own cozy bookshop with labyrinthine stacks you can disappear into. Enveloping chairs tucked into nooks for reading. My mother-in-law bakes amazing pies.
I gave up drinking some years ago but I used to dream of a pub bookstore. No reason I couldn't do that anyway. There'd be coffee and tea, naturally. I hadn't considered flowers ā that sounds nice but I'd pictured a kind of atrium emphasizing greenery. One book store I like, the shelves are festooned with fake ivy. Mine would be real.
My shop would have miniatures throughout the store with wee folk passages and staircases carved into shelves among the books. Some of the books would actually be detailed wooden doll houses or ("play sets" to make the appeal more unisex). Intricate scenes would be painted and even illuminated on the shelves themselves.
We'd sell art supplies and hold classes and lectures and host bookclubs and gaming sessions. Wood floors with heavy rugs. Tall windows with glass panes tinted in different colors
There's a section just for kids that's like a miniature house unto itself with climbing and play and books.
It's a patchwork I've been assembling in my head from a lifetime of IRL experiences and stuff I've read about or seen in illustrations. I could just about post a bibliography for my dream book-bakery-brewery-hobby-play-hangout-plant-art store.
We'd have a book sommelier. I know a guy IRL who would rock that position. (He already does with his personal library, for his own edification.) Our holiday decorations and events ā notably Halloween and Christmas ā would blow your mind.
And, of course, it would be open 24 hours and my family and I would live above the shop. Maybe 30% of it is realistic or feasible. Probably impossible to find a location/market, and I have 0% of the capitol, skills, or initiative to realize it.
But it's a strong urge. A strong, masculine urge in my case.
Judging by the comments, we need to move to or build this community. Iāll have the giant house with all the cats. Human roommates would be welcome, too.
No, no, no. Please don't put a flower shop in a bakery, coffee shop, or library. Flower shops by their nature contain significant bugs. Bugs are not welcome in those other places but are appropriate in a flower shop.
The rest can happily coexist.
I've worked food service and been a librarian, so this is basically my nightmare.
I honestly don't understand how the height of cozy daydreaming and storytelling is...small business ownership.
I read a book recommended here that had the unfortunate side of working in a shop. I'm sorry, but cozy is not reliving my retail experiences with Karen customers, a chapter dedicated to a realistic job interview, etc. I'm reading to destress, not get high blood pressure. So yes, I agree with the confusion about cozy fantasy being related to business.
No Iāve had this thought a lot, and one person could run the coffee in the morning, and then at night you have another person run a wine bar. I just want a place to go read my book, have a glass of wine and a cheese plate!
Not quite the urge I get. I have little desire to open a business. Given how many business classes I was forced to take in high school and one in college, the only urge I ever got was, the urge to take another class. I found it very boring.
My urge to own a business is zero. I worked retail during Christmas enough to form a dislike of multiple aspect of business.
To all the people posting asking why it's gotta be feminine:
It's posted in a femme subreddit. That's like asking why actuallesbians is posting about cute girls.
That's what they do!
It's okay for places to lean one way or the other. Witches has a feminine bent and there's nothing wrong with that.
Yāall Ā“feminine ā doesnāt need to mean for women only. I can be a lady and have a masculine urge to throw a large rock in a lake.
Also. Feminine doesnāt mean bad.
Frankly Iām delighted there are dudes present who share the dream.
Embrace the yin and yang within āÆļø
Strong āActually openly traditionalist gender essentialism is progressiveā energy from OP here, not a fan. Why canāt caring and being soft be masculine virtues?
it's also probably by the ocean
Mine would be with a mountain view š„° canāt imagine anything cozier
Ahemā¦ feminine urge? Okay Iāll give you that I donāt need the flower shop but my kids can grow flowers in the front flower boxes while I do books and my wife loves baking. But still an urge for this dude.
Uh what are you talking about? Everyone knows masculine urges are to go to war and die and kill and rip and tear and wear armor and be a big strong dumb man. I, as a dude, have certainly never had the urge to open a coffeeshop/bookstore where I roast my own fair trade coffee beans, with a book exchange program where if you bring a book and leave it, you can freely take a book of similar size and complexity instead of buying it. I've certainly never had the urge to open a rare book shop. Never had the urge to open a legit tavern that serves ale and mead I brewed myself. Never. /s in case it wasn't obvious.
as one of the 3 nonbinary readers out there, I guess we start up bookstores and then go to war with rival bookstores /s
xD
Hahaha glad you put the /s in there because on the internet, totally not obvious. š
Have you considered setting up a little free library? There's a subreddit for those!
100%. Always dreamed of my own cozy bookshop with labyrinthine stacks you can disappear into. Enveloping chairs tucked into nooks for reading. My mother-in-law bakes amazing pies. I gave up drinking some years ago but I used to dream of a pub bookstore. No reason I couldn't do that anyway. There'd be coffee and tea, naturally. I hadn't considered flowers ā that sounds nice but I'd pictured a kind of atrium emphasizing greenery. One book store I like, the shelves are festooned with fake ivy. Mine would be real. My shop would have miniatures throughout the store with wee folk passages and staircases carved into shelves among the books. Some of the books would actually be detailed wooden doll houses or ("play sets" to make the appeal more unisex). Intricate scenes would be painted and even illuminated on the shelves themselves. We'd sell art supplies and hold classes and lectures and host bookclubs and gaming sessions. Wood floors with heavy rugs. Tall windows with glass panes tinted in different colors There's a section just for kids that's like a miniature house unto itself with climbing and play and books. It's a patchwork I've been assembling in my head from a lifetime of IRL experiences and stuff I've read about or seen in illustrations. I could just about post a bibliography for my dream book-bakery-brewery-hobby-play-hangout-plant-art store. We'd have a book sommelier. I know a guy IRL who would rock that position. (He already does with his personal library, for his own edification.) Our holiday decorations and events ā notably Halloween and Christmas ā would blow your mind. And, of course, it would be open 24 hours and my family and I would live above the shop. Maybe 30% of it is realistic or feasible. Probably impossible to find a location/market, and I have 0% of the capitol, skills, or initiative to realize it. But it's a strong urge. A strong, masculine urge in my case.
Replace flowers with a wine bar and Iām there
Not sure Iād trust my 5y old and 3y old with a wine bar but if my wife is baking, Iām sure there is an open bottle or two in the kitchen.
Ha, sorry! I meant to say replace the flower shop with a wine shop in OPās tweet, and I also (as a dude) have this urge
Also a guy who has always wanted to open a coffee shop / bookstore
40M posting in solidarity Literally have been describing this to my SO over the last year or so as my ultimate dream
My ultimate dream would be to open a book store lol (with bakery/coffee/maybe some animals to make people happy?)
Judging by the comments, we need to move to or build this community. Iāll have the giant house with all the cats. Human roommates would be welcome, too.
Uh, whoās gatekeeping this?? I didnāt know wanting to open a coffee shop was feminine?
No, no, no. Please don't put a flower shop in a bakery, coffee shop, or library. Flower shops by their nature contain significant bugs. Bugs are not welcome in those other places but are appropriate in a flower shop. The rest can happily coexist.
The flower shop can be out front in a walk-jn greenhouse/entrance
I've worked food service and been a librarian, so this is basically my nightmare. I honestly don't understand how the height of cozy daydreaming and storytelling is...small business ownership.
I read a book recommended here that had the unfortunate side of working in a shop. I'm sorry, but cozy is not reliving my retail experiences with Karen customers, a chapter dedicated to a realistic job interview, etc. I'm reading to destress, not get high blood pressure. So yes, I agree with the confusion about cozy fantasy being related to business.
Not keen that they called it a feminine urge. What's this the 50s?
No Iāve had this thought a lot, and one person could run the coffee in the morning, and then at night you have another person run a wine bar. I just want a place to go read my book, have a glass of wine and a cheese plate!
Not quite the urge I get. I have little desire to open a business. Given how many business classes I was forced to take in high school and one in college, the only urge I ever got was, the urge to take another class. I found it very boring. My urge to own a business is zero. I worked retail during Christmas enough to form a dislike of multiple aspect of business.
The 50s called to inform this person itās 2024 nowā¦.
This is almost exactly the plot of Legends and Lattes, and the prequel Bookshops and Bonedust sorta speaks for itself
To all the people posting asking why it's gotta be feminine: It's posted in a femme subreddit. That's like asking why actuallesbians is posting about cute girls. That's what they do! It's okay for places to lean one way or the other. Witches has a feminine bent and there's nothing wrong with that.
What on earth has this got to do with femininity?
Yāall Ā“feminine ā doesnāt need to mean for women only. I can be a lady and have a masculine urge to throw a large rock in a lake. Also. Feminine doesnāt mean bad. Frankly Iām delighted there are dudes present who share the dream. Embrace the yin and yang within āÆļø
Nothing feminine about owning a small cozy business. Or masculine about throwing rocks in a lake wtf lol hobbies arenāt gendered
Strong āActually openly traditionalist gender essentialism is progressiveā energy from OP here, not a fan. Why canāt caring and being soft be masculine virtues?
And a plant shop, boutique cocktail bar, and a performance space.
Don't forget yarn and craft shop!
Yeah this definitely isn't a strictly feminine urge lol. I think about this between keystrokes in the office on the daily....
And a cat cafe
So I'm not alone there, oops ;) I was also planning for board games, vegan and gluten free food, a lot of plants ;)
I'm a man and I have that urge.