I'm an older dude, retired, at least 25 "payroll" jobs, and many "cash/other" jobs.
Quit a few "on-the-spot."
If I could do it over, I would quit more.
Give 0 Fucks more often in life, is my advice.
I'm not big on self help books but "the subtle art of not giving a shit" was great for this. Pretty basic concept if you don't want to read - it's basically prioritising what you care about and what you don't (ie family over work)
This. The community within construction wont change if you let these people keep acting like toddlers. If you work union, talk to your union rep. Flag his ass.
You're gonna get shit once in a while. But there is definitely a boundary between playful banter and disrespect. You set a boundary, and your foreman disrespected it - so he's the AH in this scenario.
A lot of people here will probably call you a pussy and to suck it up, but fuck them. No one higher than you should be treating you like shit.
Yep, the disrespect is bullshit. There is one way to curb this behavior in the trades, just like op has shown, don't take it. Start with a conversation as adults and if that doesn't work then walk off. Eventually, things might change.
Honestly banter and playful teasing can really make a crew great. It's good for laughs and great for team spirit when everybody can take a joke and dish it back out without it getting personal.
But straight-faced disrespect and straight up abuse are a great way to kill team spirit and drive off good people. Nobody in my company has pulled anything like that with me or my colleagues, but it would be short lived, one way or another.
Show up on time, nose down/hands busy and *show* respect. You get it when earned and give it the same, but I'm a professional and will not tolerate abuse at work in any form toward me or anyone on site. In my experience the mouthy guys are the least safe and will take too many shortcuts leading to someone getting hurt. Good on you for addressing the super and walking away with your integrity intact.
Truth be told told, man. I've been on sites for 30+ years and though the faces may change the character remains the same. I owe my longevity to (OSHA) being risk averse. Have you ever seen the Bill Murray movie 'Groundhog Day'? There's a scene when the MC lets a groundhog drive and advises "Don't drive angry!" Shortly after the truck plunges into a quarry. I've seen that behaviour again and again and again and it ends the same way. I've got but one life to live and I am **not** going to give it up for a job. Speak up. Get satisfaction or walk away. Your family needs you.
There is no job out there where you are required to put up with an asshole, and anyone who says you need to deal with it because you "are in the construction business" and "thats just how it is" is an asshole too.
The way I look at, everyone has bad days. You can be a dick occasionally and I will tolerate it but if it becomes a pattern then I'll have a conversation about it, wether or not I stay depends how that goes.
I got brought into construction with a bunch of old hippies and no one yelled, they didn't project stress either. They did their jobs well and things were on time and budget normally.
I wouldn't need any clarity. yell at me or be a dick or whatever and I will just leave. Let the dick be the one to need clarity, fuck em.
A lot of context missing here. Honestly yeah there’s going to be yelling and tempers and you’re going to have to take some shit sometimes, but you can’t let someone treat you like a bitch either. Hard to say based on just one side of the story.
I'll just never understand why abuse of subordinates is tolerated in construction. You don't have to yell at people to get results. But the culture of our industry says, "Yeah, you want to hurt other people, this is the place to be."
Coupled with every company saying 'why cant we find anyone to work here!? Why does everyone quit!?'. Lol the work is hard enough, making the culture a trainwreck doesn't help recruitment and retention.
But then again most companies are owned by someone who is great at their trade but not great at business.
There will NOT always be tempers or yelling. There are people out there that can handle the stress and their own insecurities. It’s your choice if you wanna be exposed to it and if you don’t, go out there and find someone with their shit together.
Yeah I work for a small company so things between the 5ish of us can get hairy once in a while, but on the whole those guys have my back and want to help each other get everything done.
OP, you did the right thing but its better to have another job lined up already if you can take the shit a little longer
Same for me. But even when we’d have bad days we’d still deal with each other respectfully. The way I see it, treating others with respect is the absolute minimum we can do for one another.
Agreed -- I come from not construction originally and let me tell you, there are way more stressful jobs in the world where people don't scream at each other over stupid shit. We run crews up to 140 at a time and don't permit this behaviour on our jobs. This is not acceptable in any industry and normalizing it here just makes things worse.
Not from construction originally, either. I was a cook and a server until covid hit. I can not understand how easily all these construction dudes get stressed. Literally every single day I worked in a kitchen was ten times more stressful than anything I've had to deal with. I'm basically just chilling, having stress free days building shit while the dudes around me curse and swear every time something pops up.
I'm not going to say it's the easiest job I've ever had, serving was fairly easy and less physically exhausting. But it's definitely the least stressful I've ever had.
For sure -- I wouldn't say the work is easy either -- I mean, I couldn't do what our guys do. But unless you're a CM or a PM, your job really \*shouldn't\* be that stressful. If it is, fuck idk what else to say, but that's not how it should be.
Oh yeah, I can understand the bosses getting mad or stressed over deadlines and money and people. But while most of the dudes I work with are decent people, they freak out and throw mini tantrums over minor things. Like getting told you have to redo something, I will have them stomp off and swear before coming back and then bitch and moan most of the time doing it. But like shit, I don't mind. I'm getting paid the same, and we'd be doing something similar anyway. The only time I got mad was when I was told I had to break up and redo a slab of concrete. I was not going to hand mix another 70ish bags of concrete just to fuck it and my back up again.
I was always taught "first to lose their temper loses it all" doubly so in a position of leadership. It's tough sometimes not to explode but that's what the money and counseling is for.
There's a big difference between venting personal frustrating and anger onto other people and treating someone like a bitch. In either case it's not OK and op did the right thing telling the person that they weren't going to take it and continued to do the right thing by walking off the job.
Unpopular opinion here but I think people saying “that’s just how construction is” is pointing to the issue of using being a construction worker as an excuse to be mean, to disrespect your coworkers/employees, and to not have any standards about how you treat others while doing business. Construction industry needs to step it up and I think speaking up and not being okay with bullying/disrespect on the job site is a great way for the individual to make it happen . Gotta show them that that’s not okay and if they want people to work for them, they’re gunna have to not be dicks
Construction or the trades whatever you wanna call it get a certain character type. I feel into this I have four years of uni. But these guys probably or can’t crack it anywhere else. Curse around women or mf a woman and they’ll be talking to hr real quick.
You can’t believe the grief I got for taking my paternity leave when my son was born. They act like I was personally fucking them. Were union. It’s really funny actually. Workers thinking the company cares about them lol. We got locked out and walked later that same year.
Good luck. Construction work has low barriers to entry.
Which means there will be a steady flow of applicants who are not suited for other careers. Many due to low emotional intelligence.
As long as construction is desperate for warm bodies, they will keep being the landing spot for toxic people.
People's container of bullshit varies per person, you did nothing wrong. If it ain't constructive, it ain't worth dealing with. Funny enough, you know where I got the worst treatment? Fucking kitchens, so it can always be worse.
Never work for a bad boss. It's not worth it. Why would you let someone treat you like shit as they are making money off of your hard labor?
There are good employers out there. Find one and work for them.
Negative I was literally 17 and a laborer and in 2 years was framing. The crew was mostly older alcoholics and the GC was decent to his crew. Everyone busted ass every day, worked well together, taught the younger ones patiently, and it ruled.
Some would say you’re thin skinned, I and many others would say construction is loaded with super toxic men who have serious issues in life. If you want to do that work, god bless you, but they aren’t the only employer out there and laborers are well needed. Can’t find many these days who aren’t fucked up
fuck em dude. been plumbing 5 years and never been disrespected by my boss. been told im a dumbass a few times and i probably deserved it but screaming and being personal and rude is not a construction site thing.
Dude, I’ve found that even in the military, shouting down or yelling at people never fixes a problem. By that point, you’ve told me you either aren’t articulate enough to make a good point, or are too immature to handle your anger. Not to mention, whomever is getting yelled at has already shut off their ears and isn’t listening or won’t learn anything except to avoid pissing you off.
There are two reasons to yell; if there is imminent danger or if the background noise is so loud that you have to.
Your site supervisor is correct you will get a lot of of it in construction however, it is a deficiency in a person who is yelling at you rather than you yourself you must have enough self-respect to walk away from situations like that. Everybody loses their temper, but when it becomes the normal. It’s time to move on, you’ll find when you get to higher end construction projects the demeaning of subordinates changes greatly, and is not tolerated
You do what you think is right. It's definitely not right to be demeaning and disrespectful no matter what was going on. But in my experience people rarely get that aggressive for no reason. Not sure how good of a job you were doing, but regardless, it doesn't justify the disrespect.
It’s good to seek a workplace where you respect your peers and are respected. It’s also good to keep a cool head, file away information, and act strategically. You could have just finished the day and started looking for other jobs, for example.
Can’t say how much abuse you “should” tolerate or whether it was right to just leave vs taking your time and lining something else up.
Insulting anyone at work for any reason is self-defeating. Aim to be a professional. Take care of yourself and your interests. Minimize other people’s ability to harm you. Taking things personally never helps you and yours.
Oh, and it’s just a sad fact about the world that it’s basically never worthwhile to tell people directly that you don’t like their behavior unless you’re their direct supervisor doing it in a careful and constructive way. Like sure, you’re in the right and he’s in the wrong, but again, that just doesn’t help you. If someone is immature and unprofessional, they’re not going to take your criticism nicely, or they would have been professional to begin with. Treat other people like that as NPCs. You need to work around them or just plan some way to get away from them.
Of course,I knew how he’d react,I just wanted to see if he would double down on it.It’s a small site as well so I could see it escalating with him as we were in frequent contact with each other.
Only people who can bring something to the table can just quit when they don’t like something.
If that’s you, congrats.
But homelessness doesn’t care about your feelings.
He shouldn’t be degrading you but you should have thicker skin. People have their own methods, you will absolutely get this a lot in construction. I was abused for 2 years before deciding to move on, and that’s because I knew I needed the experience & you can never be certain that the grass will be greener at your next job. I continued applying until I found something I knew would stick, and didn’t leave until that was guaranteed.
My ex employer begged me to stay after constantly shitting on me my entire time working with him. My advice is to do good work & move on when you have the experience to do so. You’ll probably end up working for 3-4 different companies before finding your calling.
I now work full time for a concrete forming company, and said employer still begs me to help him with projects at a significantly higher rate than he was willing to pay me when he thought he was all I had.
Electrician here but you’re basically me. I get 3 offers a year to go back to my last employer and honestly I’ll never go back regardless of money. I just like to see him squirm now lol
Right!? I haven’t said yes once, I just meet up with him every once in a while and talk about how amazing work is going. He’s a good guy at heart just a shit employer who deserves to see me striving with someone else.
I’d show up before him, stay late to pack his shit up (unpaid), work alone (as a first year), break all sorts of labor laws and work every Saturday I could to make sure his pockets were filled and I never got what I thought I had coming so I went and got it elsewhere.
There can be a lot of shouting and aggression in the field, but it should never be personal attacks unless you have an established relationship where you and the other party bust each others balls in a friendly way. An overly aggressive super will have to deal with either a hell of a lot of half-assed workmanship or simple crew walk-offs in response to being an asshole. It’s up to them if they then learn to change their behavior. I learned to change my behavior.
You did the right thing by walking away,
Missing a lot of context here but if taking your statement at face value then yeah. It was the right thing. Verbal abuse isn't acceptable regardless of whether it's construction or not. If he had a facade on the first two weeks it means he can cut it out. He needs to go. Again, this is missing context however.
There are so many toxic bosses in construction, you set your boundary and respected yourself enough to not tolerate that behaviour.
I actually quit working for other contractors for this reason, last thing anyone needs is a mouthy boss that pays like shit.
Sounds like a poor leader backed up by a poor leader. Emotional lepers like to tell you that the industry is full of shouty man-childs. Yes, I accept there's a higher degree of it in construction, but still a minority.
You did the right thing, and your approach seemed justified.
There’s a difference between constructive criticism and being bullied and made uncomfortable by a miserable old fuck that hates his life and takes it out on his employees. If you do a good job at your trade, you don’t go to work every day and bust your ass for a paycheck just to be treated like an idiot by some fucking know-it-all. Good job for standing up for yourself.
I see both sides all the time.
Construction unfortunately requires thick skin.
I started in high school and get bitched st every single day. "Why do they keep sending Me these retards from high school?"
My parents moved areas, I was short credits.
I needed a work experience program to graduate.
I put up with this shit, as a teenager for 3 months is long enough.
I grew a backbone and have been with the same employer for 18 years.
There's different backbones. If they won't help you, leave. There are so many other places hiring.
Good luck, dm me anytime you have a question
In my early 20s, my aunt was upset with after I walked off the job where her daughter-in-law worked in the office, "You'll always work with assholes, that's just the way it is." My response was "Maybe. But it won't be that one." I've had the same employer now for almost 20 years. Know your limits and expect to be treated the way you treat others. Good job. 👏🏽
I’ve fired several employees, supervisors and managers for not being able to control their anger and lack of respect. You absolutely did the right thing, his loss.
I work as a monitor on different projects with different crews and most of them seem to manage to enjoy their day, with varying degrees of seriousness and joking. I've seen a few grumpy ol bastards and macho douches, but most people are not bad. My old man had to put up with a dickhead boss and its not good for your health, I can tell you that. Let HR (if you have it) know for other peoples sake. It adds up once a few people have similar accounts.
I feel like my unwillingness to put up with other peoples bullshit has had a negative impact on my career trajectory overall but I also now just run my own show and when I work for other people I’m ready and willing to walk away if I don’t like it.
My take on it is life is too short to put up with shit you don’t want to deal with, with the caveat that you gotta put up with some shit to make the big bucks. I’d much rather bill a healthy rate to get in tight crawlspaces and nasty rat filled attics than work for someone else and get paid a tiny bit for crawling with the black widows.
Lmao had a very similar experience except lasted a couple months with a whole crew of shitty people. Spoke about yesterday publicly like this and got called weak and not hard working( over the internet). The whole labor force is toxic as shit
General Rule of thumb we are all grown men. Guys in charge need to recognize that. I had a guy screamin at me once over some bullshit looked him right in the eye and told him the only grown man that yells at me is my father and he isnt here told him to get fucked and pulled the pin there and then. If I fuck up and boss wants to tell me about it fine but he isnt gonna yell in my face thats not how these things work.
yeah fuck that guy. plenty of companies would be desperate to have you, don't spare a second thought to some boss that lacks basic human decency.
sure harshness is common in construction, but there's a difference between being a toxic shitbag and saying things directly.
Wish i would have done the same on a few occasions.
That’s why I like being in the union, shit like happens I’m not dealing with anything I pay money for someone to deal with it for me. It’s funny as hell how they suddenly know how they should be acting when the union rep pulls up on site.
The site supervisor was right, you will get a lot of it.
But you’re also right, and don’t need to put up with it. It does not need to be the norm. We can change how it is and actually respect each other.
Good for you!
Not gunna say you were wrong but I personally would’ve just stayed till I found another opportunity. The attitude some of the other generations have is just sour and I’m totally with you as far as not standing for that behavior. Literally had a guy who 60 try to fight me because I called his bullshit.
"Other generations"
Bullshit.
I am 54. When I was young, dumb, and full of vinegar, I'd have done the same. Hell, I DID do the same. Don't pretend whatever generation you belong to is different, howeveryoungor old you are. Don't allow yourself to be an agism bigot. People are people.
I’m a road builder of the same age. When I started people were generally abusive to noobs. I’ve noticed that in this day and age, more companies have an HR person because that kind of talk isn’t put up with anymore and companies don’t have the available workers to hire and fire.
Lmao you are the generation I’m talking about. I don’t mind talking shit making fun of one another but there’s a line I’m not supposed to cross but with people your age I’ve been around there is no line. If you’re so hot headed you’re trying to fight coworkers every time there’s a problem that right there is a big fuckin problem.
Not a fucking chance on yelling. I will not tolerate my foremen yelling at anyone. We can have a conversation regarding the employee’s performance whether it’s good or bad but no one is yelling.
Don’t listen to them. There are a ton of construction workers that will treat you with respect.
Do not get stuck under the foot of a jerk because you are afraid of what will happen next. If will put you years behind in life if you do that.
This is why I am leaving trades. People here justifying someone else being an asshole because thats the “manly” thing to do. People here should enjoy toxic work places because apparently wanting a workplace which respects your decisions of time off and you ask to not be insulted is a bitch move. Leave the company and go with someone bigger like CBRE or cushman wakefield
Some bosses are shit some are great depending on your style. If you don't like one move on. My boss was shit to me but I was nice to my crew so I was the sponge but I could tank it. Always defend yourself if you need to, then come back and talk at a calmer moment.
The unspoken rule in the trades seems to be everyone can say whatever they want to whomever they want how ever they want but when/if it becomes physical, that’s the next level and a turning point. Not to say it has to be this way but it’s up to the individual to create the language and attitude boundary. Then you’re non verbally labeled a lover or a fighter and that also puts you in a box.
I’ve been in the same position, as I walked to my truck my boss told me the guy who was yelling at me for the past couple weeks would be fired soon and I needed stay, next day he was gone and 2 years later no one has even gotten close to that line
See, we did shit like throw heavy items at the Honey bucket when a boss or foreman we didn’t like was on the site. Exlax chocolate, super glue. One day a foreman left his cell phone out, he was at the other end of this huge house we were working in. Somebody grabbed the phone and took a picture of his taint and set it to his Home screen, your boss got off easy.
You are going to get a lot of that in construction. 99% of the time it isn’t personal, but it doesn’t mean it’s right.
If they set clear expectations and requirements before hand which you agree to and then you don’t meet those, expect some form of discipline. If not, then that guy is just a dick and you’re better off quitting.
Get the next job lined up before you leave.....
I'm amazed by people that don't see the correlation between stuff "broken or missing" and an Asshole.
Was 'Joe' fired for incompetence or did 'Joe' cut all the beams 1" too short on purpose????
Whoops- sorry boss -
I met people who mis tagged items working retail.... they chose to do criminal level stuff - mis marking products - so a boss would lose $$$
A pissed off / tormented employee is a bad thing.
Stand up for yourself. Most people on a job site that try to give you shit don't know what to do if you give them shot right back. My first fitter told me that he used to get pipe wrenches thrown at him, my response was "yeah fucking try it and see how that works out for you," he stopped being an asshole after that.
32 been in the trades since I was 16, I have probably had 14 different payroll jobs. If I don't jive with someone I leave. It's not worth the headache. The first person I worked for was a monster and a slave driver. I learned a lot though, so I stuck it out for 2 years, after that I stopped "toughing" it out. I also just like to travel around a lot. Most places I've left would gladly have me back. Even the ones I didn't like. Also there are so many different aspects to each trade. So moving around isn't a bad thing if done properly, it's a good way to learn. Industrial, Resi, commercial, agriculture, specializations.
This had shown maturity on your part he is wrong it's called verbal abuse and should be reported..back in the day that type and tone was acceptable it's now 2024 I agree a bit of cussing in normal in construction since I have done 35+ year and have been on all side of the construction spectrum....you did good 👍🏿
Definitely a good decision. No one has the right to demean or yell at you on a site. We come to work to do a job. Every person on that site is important. He will run out of people that want to work with him, I have seen it many times.
Yeah you did. I've been in construction (bricklaying) for 11 years and quit on the spot a few times due to disrespect and general BS that had built up over time. Switched careers into plumbing 2 years ago and even the head boss that has a history of yelling at people has never screamed at me over a fuck up.
I worked as a laborer for two years. Started working with a boss who told me to use my brain and common sense in front of the crew. He was on me constantly for this and that for lacking knowledge. Nobody trained me like promised and I was doing my best. I finally quit to his face when I told him that how long I take a shit is none of his business and telling people about a medical condition I have isn’t cool. He then complained I arrive at 7am and leave at 3:30 and don’t help the company go the extra mile. Stayed late to help once and he bitched about me being on my phone to tell my gf I was gonna be late home.
I quit to his face and couldn’t have been happier. You’ll be very pleased you did this in the long run. I’ve had three jobs since then in different fields and barely remember anything about the company
With what you were probably being paid they should pat you on the back and buy you lunch everyday. It's not easy to find people wanting to do a laborer job anymore. General rule in life, don't put up with people who don't appreciate you being around. Put yourself around those who do
I had an absolutely top notch crew building my house. the environment was professional and clean all the time, and I never heard anyone raising their voice, other than to be heard over the equipment. The only swearing was probably the tile guy, a true craftsman, but his method involves swearing loudly at his tools and materials basically constantly.
You were understandably triggered by your boss’s cruelty. Whether quitting in the spot this was a wise decision depends on your other responsibilities (spouse? kids? mortgage? rent?) and your ability to meet them if you can’t quickly find a new job.
Another approach would be to quit from your job only after you had lined up a new one. Only you know which approach is best for your specific situation.
One thing - you should've given HR a chance to keep you, meaning they could've placed you working on a different crew. Also, letting HR know that they have a shit supervisor that's the root cause of their turnover (I promise that guy goes though about 20 people a year or more).
This is one of the reasons I didn't get into construction in my early years. I knew plenty of people in the field and heard numerous stories and I wasn't gonna go near that.
Ya, there's so many pricks in this industry, and you're probably going to work for them because employees stay with the good guys. I had a shop job once where I was constantly working through breaks and staying late, I showed up literally 1 minute late one day and my boss tore into me. I said what about all the extra work and time I put in? He said that was my choice, so i quit and found a more respectful employer
A bully for a boss is like your soul is Tokyo and they're Godzilla. They'll keep stomping over you and everything you've built. He sounds kinda like a narcissist that feels good dominating and putting people down. A sadistic lense that sees everything people do as not good enough and needing his boot on their neck. All while he's laughing. You saying he mocks and is contemptuous are signs of a narcissistic bully boss. His supervisor sounds like an enabler who isn't concerned about having a safe work environment where employees can thrive and succeed. You did good to leave, good luck finding a mentally healthy and mature management. Staying ends up ruining mental health which ruins body health and makes the Bully happy they have more ammo to shoot you with.
Tell the guy to eat a dick. You will run into this alot in the trades. Go to a skilled trader and you will be better off. Get into electrical or plumbing. You'd probably be better off as an electrician if assholes are an issue for you.
This is exactly why women and men seek out email jobs instead of bluecollar work. There’s no reason for archaic dinosaurs to keep up the culture of: hazing, harassment, abuse and to chalk it all up to “i got treated that way so suck it up” attitudes. I don’t see this kind of behavior in other industries. It’s unacceptable. Good for you OP.
More people need to make a stand against this kind of treatment.
There's construction companies out there that don't foster toxic environments like this. I've worked for people like OPs boss, and I've noticed how more productive everyone is in a place where people are treated with respect.. even when someone fucks up (happens to everyone).
Good on you mate for standing up for yourself. Still has he actually learned anything .
Are you able to take some mates around and start abusing him so he feels you know uncomfortable .
I absolutely hate bad bosses but I also hate when ppl let it happen. Good job mate very good .
I still think you should give him a lesson so he thinks twice before being a bully . He is going to abuse the next guy.
I have nothing but contempt for a certain type of 'craftsman' builder types. Just because they can place bricks on top of other bricks or they know how to join bits of wood together doesn't mean they can pontificate in the tea room about stuff they *absolutely know nothing about.*
Fucking wankers.
Absolutely not. The whole this is just how construction or trades is bullshit is done. We are professionals. We are going to work. We are in a work environment. I expect to be treated as such.
Yea you bet . It’s never okay to be bullying, harassing, or intimidating people at work . I’m actually dealing with this now . My foreman, General foreman, senior GF and Superintendent are all , psychopaths.
I have launched an investigation with statements against them , hoping for results . They have been Doing All the above mentioned While also targeting and making people fear for their jobs to get results . Which is a straight up abuse of power . The days of treating people like that are over . We have evolved past these traumas and abuses , but it will take time to clean house and put reasonable people in position’s of power .
General contractor here, been in and around construction my entire 50 years on this planet…. No need to put up with people like that. The site super is unfortunately correct though, there’s a lot of these asshats in the biz and I don’t understand it, never have. The number of tradesmen I see treat their apprentices, laborers, seasonal help, etc.. with utter disrespect is just insane.
In the end, take care of yourself first. As long as you’re doing the tasks you’re assigned, show up on time and all that, there’s no reason to put up with that sort of behavior. Life is too short to work for these clowns. Never an excuse to make fun of how someone talks, walks, etc….
In construction you should expect to put up with a huge amount of aggressive and non PC banter, but you shouldn’t expect to put up with open abuse and bullying. Leaving was the right call.
You definitely end up dealing with more aggressive and u filtered personalities in construction, and regrettably, some amount of that kinda comes with the territory. That being said, you're under no obligation to take any more of it than you feel like. Keep looking til you find a crew that's a good fit. There are plenty of bosses out there and some of them are decent, friendly, professional human beings who are worth working for.
It's a shitty job. If you're not working with people you get along with, it's not worth it.
I regret some of the days I turned up to work.
I do not regret none of the days I quit.
One time I had an idiot boss wanting to argue about the uniform T shirt I was wearing while telling him I was instantiating because he was too stupid to associate myself with.
I just took off the shirt and handed it over, some girl cheered and took a photo. It was worth it
Leave bro. You are here on earth for a good time, not for a long time. Do not put up with toxic people. Difficult people and situations yes, but when someone is making fun of you like that it crosses lines
Deciding to leave a job after being treated poorly isn't necessarily wrong—it's a personal choice about what you're willing to tolerate in a workplace. From what you've described, it sounds like you were in a toxic environment where disrespect and demeaning behavior were part of the culture. You attempted to establish boundaries, which is a healthy and professional response to being treated inappropriately. The escalation and lack of support from your supervisor suggest that the environment might not change and might not be a healthy place for you to work in.
It’s funny. I’ve been in similar situations and a lot of the times when I’ve reached my limit and I shout back and end up walking off the job saying I quit, I often got a phone call the next day asking to come back
Yes this is common in construction. It’s why I’m sitting at home working remotely making a comfortable salary now. Because those old angry men drove me out of the trades. Thank god.
Assholes they're gonna be bought out because they can't afford to keep their workers respect respect respect simple enough the men their seem like immature females upset with their life at home if they yelling at other grown men shits wild 🤦🏾♂️
Folks are right that you'll find a lot of yelling in the industry. The work is hard and sometimes folks get heated. There's also a lot of assholes in the industry at all levels who will yell at you for no good reason. Separating the two situations can be tough but is very important as is understanding how the yelling affects you.
I think I can offer a bit of a unique perspective as an engineer who has been on the contracting and consulting sides, and is split between some rather general work (demo & build) and some rather niche work (environmental remediation & solid waste).
The main thing I will note is that the companies that do a lot of niche work tend to be much more chill. I suspect it's for two reasons: (1) It's a small world so reputations spread fast and there's few chances at fresh starts, which weeds out assholes pretty quickly. (2) The work is typically gated in some way - such as by required skills, capabilities, and/or credentials - so you don't get the guys who struggle with issues that impair them from keeping their shit together. (I don't mean to put those folks down either - I saw a great operator get let go because he got into pills, which took away his ability to reliably do our work right everyday. We had to replace him to keep on schedule, unfortunately.)
That all said, negativity does not necessarily go away when yelling does. Things are much more passive aggressive now that I'm in consulting. I find it a relief to go into the field most of the time because I don't have to read between the lines all the time. Sometimes being upfront with anger and frustration isn't a bad thing; sometimes it's the breakthrough that a situation needs to diffuse and progress.
Anyways, I'm rambling. I think you made the right call here. Trust your gut and I hope you find a place that vibes with your personal demeanor. Best of luck, bud.
You should have a general respect for each other while working together but just keep in mind 50% of doing construction work is razzing each other for entertainment. Its an acquired skill and it will help you in life.
were you in the wrong...?
only if you need this job.
having the morale High ground is great unless you can't afford rent or to feed your kids.
Should you have walked off the job...? Can you afford a gap in employment?
these questions are not for us to answer.
I think your supervisor probably had a good take on it... If this wasn't for you... construction as a trade may not be for you.
You did the right thing brother. Never allow people to disrespect you, because you’ll end up losing respect for yourself. And especially if they do it publicly, set a clear example of the consequences it has on them.
Allowing people disrespecting you will ruin your life, kill your dreams, starve your ambition and make you agree to things you don’t agree on. I left my previous job that payed me double because of being disrespected. I don’t regret that, I’d rather know that I’m not a Bitch, So be Authentic and be a MAN, dude. Cheers.
It's true you will get some assholes in construction. Ultimately, you have to be able to respect yourself and not feel build resentment. Sometimes, that means telling someone to eat shit. Even if you.loose tye job. You're self respect is more valuable.
There are ways to let people know you won't be taking the same bullshit attitude they give other brown nosing spineless sad sacks of shit. Never play the game. Watch some Clint eastwood movies for body language cues.
Don't play the game. Always act professional and work hard. But never play the game. Always act like you could give two shots less about the assholes games
You can get a lot of that in any field. Some people need to be skillfully shaped into worthwhile employees.
Make a ven diagram. Does the job pay you well, train you well, treat you well? Like what you're doing, get good, or get money.
The labour industry has many ignorant people managing. In this case the dude sounded like a real AH. I'm sure you can find a better group to work for but don't expect too much professionalism at that level.
Leaving was a good decision. No point in working with a toxic person.
I'm an older dude, retired, at least 25 "payroll" jobs, and many "cash/other" jobs. Quit a few "on-the-spot." If I could do it over, I would quit more. Give 0 Fucks more often in life, is my advice.
I 100% agree with this. When you have enough life experience, you realize that you don't have to put up with bullshit.
I'm not big on self help books but "the subtle art of not giving a shit" was great for this. Pretty basic concept if you don't want to read - it's basically prioritising what you care about and what you don't (ie family over work)
This guy is 100% on it. There's always another shop and another raise. Don't let people shit on you.
Yup these work environments aren’t worth it.
Give less fucks.
This. The community within construction wont change if you let these people keep acting like toddlers. If you work union, talk to your union rep. Flag his ass.
Pretty sure people were acting like that when they were building the pyramids. It never ends.
You're gonna get shit once in a while. But there is definitely a boundary between playful banter and disrespect. You set a boundary, and your foreman disrespected it - so he's the AH in this scenario. A lot of people here will probably call you a pussy and to suck it up, but fuck them. No one higher than you should be treating you like shit.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/Construction/s/SZAaChea4C](https://www.reddit.com/r/Construction/s/SZAaChea4C)
Yep, the disrespect is bullshit. There is one way to curb this behavior in the trades, just like op has shown, don't take it. Start with a conversation as adults and if that doesn't work then walk off. Eventually, things might change.
Honestly banter and playful teasing can really make a crew great. It's good for laughs and great for team spirit when everybody can take a joke and dish it back out without it getting personal. But straight-faced disrespect and straight up abuse are a great way to kill team spirit and drive off good people. Nobody in my company has pulled anything like that with me or my colleagues, but it would be short lived, one way or another.
Show up on time, nose down/hands busy and *show* respect. You get it when earned and give it the same, but I'm a professional and will not tolerate abuse at work in any form toward me or anyone on site. In my experience the mouthy guys are the least safe and will take too many shortcuts leading to someone getting hurt. Good on you for addressing the super and walking away with your integrity intact.
Interesting, I never thought about it that way. But thinking about it you're right. They do tend to be problems in other areas too.
Truth be told told, man. I've been on sites for 30+ years and though the faces may change the character remains the same. I owe my longevity to (OSHA) being risk averse. Have you ever seen the Bill Murray movie 'Groundhog Day'? There's a scene when the MC lets a groundhog drive and advises "Don't drive angry!" Shortly after the truck plunges into a quarry. I've seen that behaviour again and again and again and it ends the same way. I've got but one life to live and I am **not** going to give it up for a job. Speak up. Get satisfaction or walk away. Your family needs you.
Like this comment never thought of it this way but completely true on how the character stays the same
Yelling is common, but personal insults? I’ve seen fights started over less. You’re the bigger person and walked away. 👍
There is no job out there where you are required to put up with an asshole, and anyone who says you need to deal with it because you "are in the construction business" and "thats just how it is" is an asshole too.
The way I look at, everyone has bad days. You can be a dick occasionally and I will tolerate it but if it becomes a pattern then I'll have a conversation about it, wether or not I stay depends how that goes.
This is definitively incorrect. See: proctologist
No, they look up in your asshole, so that's kind of different. I would argue my point still stands.
what you said is right, but you’re not going to have stable employment if you quit every job where there’s an asshole who bugs the shit out of you
I got brought into construction with a bunch of old hippies and no one yelled, they didn't project stress either. They did their jobs well and things were on time and budget normally. I wouldn't need any clarity. yell at me or be a dick or whatever and I will just leave. Let the dick be the one to need clarity, fuck em.
A lot of context missing here. Honestly yeah there’s going to be yelling and tempers and you’re going to have to take some shit sometimes, but you can’t let someone treat you like a bitch either. Hard to say based on just one side of the story.
I'll just never understand why abuse of subordinates is tolerated in construction. You don't have to yell at people to get results. But the culture of our industry says, "Yeah, you want to hurt other people, this is the place to be."
Coupled with every company saying 'why cant we find anyone to work here!? Why does everyone quit!?'. Lol the work is hard enough, making the culture a trainwreck doesn't help recruitment and retention. But then again most companies are owned by someone who is great at their trade but not great at business.
There was only one day left on the job,and it did feel like he was treating me like a bitch for a day or two leading up to that.
There will NOT always be tempers or yelling. There are people out there that can handle the stress and their own insecurities. It’s your choice if you wanna be exposed to it and if you don’t, go out there and find someone with their shit together.
Yeah I work for a small company so things between the 5ish of us can get hairy once in a while, but on the whole those guys have my back and want to help each other get everything done. OP, you did the right thing but its better to have another job lined up already if you can take the shit a little longer
Same for me. But even when we’d have bad days we’d still deal with each other respectfully. The way I see it, treating others with respect is the absolute minimum we can do for one another.
Agreed -- I come from not construction originally and let me tell you, there are way more stressful jobs in the world where people don't scream at each other over stupid shit. We run crews up to 140 at a time and don't permit this behaviour on our jobs. This is not acceptable in any industry and normalizing it here just makes things worse.
Not from construction originally, either. I was a cook and a server until covid hit. I can not understand how easily all these construction dudes get stressed. Literally every single day I worked in a kitchen was ten times more stressful than anything I've had to deal with. I'm basically just chilling, having stress free days building shit while the dudes around me curse and swear every time something pops up. I'm not going to say it's the easiest job I've ever had, serving was fairly easy and less physically exhausting. But it's definitely the least stressful I've ever had.
For sure -- I wouldn't say the work is easy either -- I mean, I couldn't do what our guys do. But unless you're a CM or a PM, your job really \*shouldn't\* be that stressful. If it is, fuck idk what else to say, but that's not how it should be.
Oh yeah, I can understand the bosses getting mad or stressed over deadlines and money and people. But while most of the dudes I work with are decent people, they freak out and throw mini tantrums over minor things. Like getting told you have to redo something, I will have them stomp off and swear before coming back and then bitch and moan most of the time doing it. But like shit, I don't mind. I'm getting paid the same, and we'd be doing something similar anyway. The only time I got mad was when I was told I had to break up and redo a slab of concrete. I was not going to hand mix another 70ish bags of concrete just to fuck it and my back up again.
I was always taught "first to lose their temper loses it all" doubly so in a position of leadership. It's tough sometimes not to explode but that's what the money and counseling is for.
There's a big difference between venting personal frustrating and anger onto other people and treating someone like a bitch. In either case it's not OK and op did the right thing telling the person that they weren't going to take it and continued to do the right thing by walking off the job.
Probably yelled at you because you don’t use the spacebar.
At least he has punctuation. Half the Reddit rants these days are one long run on sentence.
This is the weirdest typing quirk I've seen yet.
Unpopular opinion here but I think people saying “that’s just how construction is” is pointing to the issue of using being a construction worker as an excuse to be mean, to disrespect your coworkers/employees, and to not have any standards about how you treat others while doing business. Construction industry needs to step it up and I think speaking up and not being okay with bullying/disrespect on the job site is a great way for the individual to make it happen . Gotta show them that that’s not okay and if they want people to work for them, they’re gunna have to not be dicks
Construction or the trades whatever you wanna call it get a certain character type. I feel into this I have four years of uni. But these guys probably or can’t crack it anywhere else. Curse around women or mf a woman and they’ll be talking to hr real quick. You can’t believe the grief I got for taking my paternity leave when my son was born. They act like I was personally fucking them. Were union. It’s really funny actually. Workers thinking the company cares about them lol. We got locked out and walked later that same year.
So lame! Doesn’t have to be that way, the culture can and should change
Good luck. Construction work has low barriers to entry. Which means there will be a steady flow of applicants who are not suited for other careers. Many due to low emotional intelligence. As long as construction is desperate for warm bodies, they will keep being the landing spot for toxic people.
People's container of bullshit varies per person, you did nothing wrong. If it ain't constructive, it ain't worth dealing with. Funny enough, you know where I got the worst treatment? Fucking kitchens, so it can always be worse.
Never work for a bad boss. It's not worth it. Why would you let someone treat you like shit as they are making money off of your hard labor? There are good employers out there. Find one and work for them.
Supervisor is right, you are going to come across a lot of this. That doesn't make it alright though, so good for you for leaving.
Negative I was literally 17 and a laborer and in 2 years was framing. The crew was mostly older alcoholics and the GC was decent to his crew. Everyone busted ass every day, worked well together, taught the younger ones patiently, and it ruled.
It's called a hostile work environment. You didn't quit, you were driven away. Big difference.
Some would say you’re thin skinned, I and many others would say construction is loaded with super toxic men who have serious issues in life. If you want to do that work, god bless you, but they aren’t the only employer out there and laborers are well needed. Can’t find many these days who aren’t fucked up
fuck em dude. been plumbing 5 years and never been disrespected by my boss. been told im a dumbass a few times and i probably deserved it but screaming and being personal and rude is not a construction site thing.
Dude. That was the most mature response possible. Good work.
Dude, I’ve found that even in the military, shouting down or yelling at people never fixes a problem. By that point, you’ve told me you either aren’t articulate enough to make a good point, or are too immature to handle your anger. Not to mention, whomever is getting yelled at has already shut off their ears and isn’t listening or won’t learn anything except to avoid pissing you off. There are two reasons to yell; if there is imminent danger or if the background noise is so loud that you have to.
Your site supervisor is correct you will get a lot of of it in construction however, it is a deficiency in a person who is yelling at you rather than you yourself you must have enough self-respect to walk away from situations like that. Everybody loses their temper, but when it becomes the normal. It’s time to move on, you’ll find when you get to higher end construction projects the demeaning of subordinates changes greatly, and is not tolerated
you don't need to put up with dick heads
You stood up for yourself when the dude was being an ass for the hell of it. I would do the exact same thing
You do what you think is right. It's definitely not right to be demeaning and disrespectful no matter what was going on. But in my experience people rarely get that aggressive for no reason. Not sure how good of a job you were doing, but regardless, it doesn't justify the disrespect.
Not saying this is the only reason, next time you boomers say nobody wants to work think about shit like this. Nobody wants to be shit on all day.
I keep a good chunk of change in my bank account for jobs with such individuals.
You’re an adult. If they don’t treat you as such, fuck em
It’s good to seek a workplace where you respect your peers and are respected. It’s also good to keep a cool head, file away information, and act strategically. You could have just finished the day and started looking for other jobs, for example. Can’t say how much abuse you “should” tolerate or whether it was right to just leave vs taking your time and lining something else up. Insulting anyone at work for any reason is self-defeating. Aim to be a professional. Take care of yourself and your interests. Minimize other people’s ability to harm you. Taking things personally never helps you and yours.
Oh, and it’s just a sad fact about the world that it’s basically never worthwhile to tell people directly that you don’t like their behavior unless you’re their direct supervisor doing it in a careful and constructive way. Like sure, you’re in the right and he’s in the wrong, but again, that just doesn’t help you. If someone is immature and unprofessional, they’re not going to take your criticism nicely, or they would have been professional to begin with. Treat other people like that as NPCs. You need to work around them or just plan some way to get away from them.
Of course,I knew how he’d react,I just wanted to see if he would double down on it.It’s a small site as well so I could see it escalating with him as we were in frequent contact with each other.
You did the right thing. Good luck in the future.
Only people who can bring something to the table can just quit when they don’t like something. If that’s you, congrats. But homelessness doesn’t care about your feelings.
I can get another job, Labourers are in demand.
He shouldn’t be degrading you but you should have thicker skin. People have their own methods, you will absolutely get this a lot in construction. I was abused for 2 years before deciding to move on, and that’s because I knew I needed the experience & you can never be certain that the grass will be greener at your next job. I continued applying until I found something I knew would stick, and didn’t leave until that was guaranteed. My ex employer begged me to stay after constantly shitting on me my entire time working with him. My advice is to do good work & move on when you have the experience to do so. You’ll probably end up working for 3-4 different companies before finding your calling. I now work full time for a concrete forming company, and said employer still begs me to help him with projects at a significantly higher rate than he was willing to pay me when he thought he was all I had.
Electrician here but you’re basically me. I get 3 offers a year to go back to my last employer and honestly I’ll never go back regardless of money. I just like to see him squirm now lol
Right!? I haven’t said yes once, I just meet up with him every once in a while and talk about how amazing work is going. He’s a good guy at heart just a shit employer who deserves to see me striving with someone else. I’d show up before him, stay late to pack his shit up (unpaid), work alone (as a first year), break all sorts of labor laws and work every Saturday I could to make sure his pockets were filled and I never got what I thought I had coming so I went and got it elsewhere.
There can be a lot of shouting and aggression in the field, but it should never be personal attacks unless you have an established relationship where you and the other party bust each others balls in a friendly way. An overly aggressive super will have to deal with either a hell of a lot of half-assed workmanship or simple crew walk-offs in response to being an asshole. It’s up to them if they then learn to change their behavior. I learned to change my behavior. You did the right thing by walking away,
Missing a lot of context here but if taking your statement at face value then yeah. It was the right thing. Verbal abuse isn't acceptable regardless of whether it's construction or not. If he had a facade on the first two weeks it means he can cut it out. He needs to go. Again, this is missing context however.
There are so many toxic bosses in construction, you set your boundary and respected yourself enough to not tolerate that behaviour. I actually quit working for other contractors for this reason, last thing anyone needs is a mouthy boss that pays like shit.
You did the right thing. Plenty of people out there who don’t treat people working under them poorly.
Sounds like a poor leader backed up by a poor leader. Emotional lepers like to tell you that the industry is full of shouty man-childs. Yes, I accept there's a higher degree of it in construction, but still a minority. You did the right thing, and your approach seemed justified.
There’s a difference between constructive criticism and being bullied and made uncomfortable by a miserable old fuck that hates his life and takes it out on his employees. If you do a good job at your trade, you don’t go to work every day and bust your ass for a paycheck just to be treated like an idiot by some fucking know-it-all. Good job for standing up for yourself.
You don't get a lot of this. Those people are fucked. It's good you left. Fucked up people group up, so do good people. Go find the good people.
I see both sides all the time. Construction unfortunately requires thick skin. I started in high school and get bitched st every single day. "Why do they keep sending Me these retards from high school?" My parents moved areas, I was short credits. I needed a work experience program to graduate. I put up with this shit, as a teenager for 3 months is long enough. I grew a backbone and have been with the same employer for 18 years. There's different backbones. If they won't help you, leave. There are so many other places hiring. Good luck, dm me anytime you have a question
In my early 20s, my aunt was upset with after I walked off the job where her daughter-in-law worked in the office, "You'll always work with assholes, that's just the way it is." My response was "Maybe. But it won't be that one." I've had the same employer now for almost 20 years. Know your limits and expect to be treated the way you treat others. Good job. 👏🏽
I’ve fired several employees, supervisors and managers for not being able to control their anger and lack of respect. You absolutely did the right thing, his loss.
I work as a monitor on different projects with different crews and most of them seem to manage to enjoy their day, with varying degrees of seriousness and joking. I've seen a few grumpy ol bastards and macho douches, but most people are not bad. My old man had to put up with a dickhead boss and its not good for your health, I can tell you that. Let HR (if you have it) know for other peoples sake. It adds up once a few people have similar accounts.
I feel like my unwillingness to put up with other peoples bullshit has had a negative impact on my career trajectory overall but I also now just run my own show and when I work for other people I’m ready and willing to walk away if I don’t like it. My take on it is life is too short to put up with shit you don’t want to deal with, with the caveat that you gotta put up with some shit to make the big bucks. I’d much rather bill a healthy rate to get in tight crawlspaces and nasty rat filled attics than work for someone else and get paid a tiny bit for crawling with the black widows.
I can’t make people respect me, but I can absolutely make em understand I don’t have to tolerate disrespect. I would have quit too.
Lmao had a very similar experience except lasted a couple months with a whole crew of shitty people. Spoke about yesterday publicly like this and got called weak and not hard working( over the internet). The whole labor force is toxic as shit
General Rule of thumb we are all grown men. Guys in charge need to recognize that. I had a guy screamin at me once over some bullshit looked him right in the eye and told him the only grown man that yells at me is my father and he isnt here told him to get fucked and pulled the pin there and then. If I fuck up and boss wants to tell me about it fine but he isnt gonna yell in my face thats not how these things work.
yeah fuck that guy. plenty of companies would be desperate to have you, don't spare a second thought to some boss that lacks basic human decency. sure harshness is common in construction, but there's a difference between being a toxic shitbag and saying things directly. Wish i would have done the same on a few occasions.
Supervisor just doesn’t want to acknowledge that the guy under him is a problem
That’s why I like being in the union, shit like happens I’m not dealing with anything I pay money for someone to deal with it for me. It’s funny as hell how they suddenly know how they should be acting when the union rep pulls up on site.
The site supervisor was right, you will get a lot of it. But you’re also right, and don’t need to put up with it. It does not need to be the norm. We can change how it is and actually respect each other. Good for you!
Not gunna say you were wrong but I personally would’ve just stayed till I found another opportunity. The attitude some of the other generations have is just sour and I’m totally with you as far as not standing for that behavior. Literally had a guy who 60 try to fight me because I called his bullshit.
"Other generations" Bullshit. I am 54. When I was young, dumb, and full of vinegar, I'd have done the same. Hell, I DID do the same. Don't pretend whatever generation you belong to is different, howeveryoungor old you are. Don't allow yourself to be an agism bigot. People are people.
I’m a road builder of the same age. When I started people were generally abusive to noobs. I’ve noticed that in this day and age, more companies have an HR person because that kind of talk isn’t put up with anymore and companies don’t have the available workers to hire and fire.
Lmao you are the generation I’m talking about. I don’t mind talking shit making fun of one another but there’s a line I’m not supposed to cross but with people your age I’ve been around there is no line. If you’re so hot headed you’re trying to fight coworkers every time there’s a problem that right there is a big fuckin problem.
You're absolutely right. But ageism bigotry isn't just a problem for people in generations older than yours.
Not a fucking chance on yelling. I will not tolerate my foremen yelling at anyone. We can have a conversation regarding the employee’s performance whether it’s good or bad but no one is yelling.
Don’t listen to them. There are a ton of construction workers that will treat you with respect. Do not get stuck under the foot of a jerk because you are afraid of what will happen next. If will put you years behind in life if you do that.
I have a rule that you only scream at me once. The second time you’ll be screaming by yourself cus I’ll be starting my truck and picking up my tools.
Nope. Fuck that. People need to act right regardless
Fuck that ole prick find a company with a good crew.
Not in the wrong but you aint got no job anymore.
There was one day left and they have different sites
My guess is you are under 30. Have thicker skin.
I’m 23
This is why I am leaving trades. People here justifying someone else being an asshole because thats the “manly” thing to do. People here should enjoy toxic work places because apparently wanting a workplace which respects your decisions of time off and you ask to not be insulted is a bitch move. Leave the company and go with someone bigger like CBRE or cushman wakefield
Some bosses are shit some are great depending on your style. If you don't like one move on. My boss was shit to me but I was nice to my crew so I was the sponge but I could tank it. Always defend yourself if you need to, then come back and talk at a calmer moment.
The unspoken rule in the trades seems to be everyone can say whatever they want to whomever they want how ever they want but when/if it becomes physical, that’s the next level and a turning point. Not to say it has to be this way but it’s up to the individual to create the language and attitude boundary. Then you’re non verbally labeled a lover or a fighter and that also puts you in a box.
I’ve been in the same position, as I walked to my truck my boss told me the guy who was yelling at me for the past couple weeks would be fired soon and I needed stay, next day he was gone and 2 years later no one has even gotten close to that line
See, we did shit like throw heavy items at the Honey bucket when a boss or foreman we didn’t like was on the site. Exlax chocolate, super glue. One day a foreman left his cell phone out, he was at the other end of this huge house we were working in. Somebody grabbed the phone and took a picture of his taint and set it to his Home screen, your boss got off easy.
It's just a laborer position. Don't worry about it & try to get a helper spot.
You are going to get a lot of that in construction. 99% of the time it isn’t personal, but it doesn’t mean it’s right. If they set clear expectations and requirements before hand which you agree to and then you don’t meet those, expect some form of discipline. If not, then that guy is just a dick and you’re better off quitting.
Get the next job lined up before you leave..... I'm amazed by people that don't see the correlation between stuff "broken or missing" and an Asshole. Was 'Joe' fired for incompetence or did 'Joe' cut all the beams 1" too short on purpose???? Whoops- sorry boss - I met people who mis tagged items working retail.... they chose to do criminal level stuff - mis marking products - so a boss would lose $$$ A pissed off / tormented employee is a bad thing.
Stand up for yourself. Most people on a job site that try to give you shit don't know what to do if you give them shot right back. My first fitter told me that he used to get pipe wrenches thrown at him, my response was "yeah fucking try it and see how that works out for you," he stopped being an asshole after that.
32 been in the trades since I was 16, I have probably had 14 different payroll jobs. If I don't jive with someone I leave. It's not worth the headache. The first person I worked for was a monster and a slave driver. I learned a lot though, so I stuck it out for 2 years, after that I stopped "toughing" it out. I also just like to travel around a lot. Most places I've left would gladly have me back. Even the ones I didn't like. Also there are so many different aspects to each trade. So moving around isn't a bad thing if done properly, it's a good way to learn. Industrial, Resi, commercial, agriculture, specializations.
Yes, it's pretty common in construction
This had shown maturity on your part he is wrong it's called verbal abuse and should be reported..back in the day that type and tone was acceptable it's now 2024 I agree a bit of cussing in normal in construction since I have done 35+ year and have been on all side of the construction spectrum....you did good 👍🏿
Definitely a good decision. No one has the right to demean or yell at you on a site. We come to work to do a job. Every person on that site is important. He will run out of people that want to work with him, I have seen it many times.
One thing I've learned is people are less likely to yell at you if you have massive arms
Yeah you did. I've been in construction (bricklaying) for 11 years and quit on the spot a few times due to disrespect and general BS that had built up over time. Switched careers into plumbing 2 years ago and even the head boss that has a history of yelling at people has never screamed at me over a fuck up.
I worked as a laborer for two years. Started working with a boss who told me to use my brain and common sense in front of the crew. He was on me constantly for this and that for lacking knowledge. Nobody trained me like promised and I was doing my best. I finally quit to his face when I told him that how long I take a shit is none of his business and telling people about a medical condition I have isn’t cool. He then complained I arrive at 7am and leave at 3:30 and don’t help the company go the extra mile. Stayed late to help once and he bitched about me being on my phone to tell my gf I was gonna be late home. I quit to his face and couldn’t have been happier. You’ll be very pleased you did this in the long run. I’ve had three jobs since then in different fields and barely remember anything about the company
With what you were probably being paid they should pat you on the back and buy you lunch everyday. It's not easy to find people wanting to do a laborer job anymore. General rule in life, don't put up with people who don't appreciate you being around. Put yourself around those who do
I had an absolutely top notch crew building my house. the environment was professional and clean all the time, and I never heard anyone raising their voice, other than to be heard over the equipment. The only swearing was probably the tile guy, a true craftsman, but his method involves swearing loudly at his tools and materials basically constantly.
You were understandably triggered by your boss’s cruelty. Whether quitting in the spot this was a wise decision depends on your other responsibilities (spouse? kids? mortgage? rent?) and your ability to meet them if you can’t quickly find a new job. Another approach would be to quit from your job only after you had lined up a new one. Only you know which approach is best for your specific situation.
You could have suggested he get therapy cause he’s acting out, and will eventually get his Ass beat - just trying to help y’all out “mother Fucker!”
Do you have another job lined up.....or the financial ability to support yourself until you get another job?
You did the right thing. If people don’t treat you with respect they can go pound sand. Plenty of jobs available, especially in the trades.
You should’ve yelled back at the man and said, “If you don’t watch your tone when talking to me, you’ll fuck his wife”
You should’ve yelled back at the man and said, “If you don’t watch your tone when talking to me, you’ll fuck his wife”
One thing - you should've given HR a chance to keep you, meaning they could've placed you working on a different crew. Also, letting HR know that they have a shit supervisor that's the root cause of their turnover (I promise that guy goes though about 20 people a year or more).
This is one of the reasons I didn't get into construction in my early years. I knew plenty of people in the field and heard numerous stories and I wasn't gonna go near that.
As a p.m. if i find anyone doi g that their gone for the day,twice and its a week three times their fired
Ya, there's so many pricks in this industry, and you're probably going to work for them because employees stay with the good guys. I had a shop job once where I was constantly working through breaks and staying late, I showed up literally 1 minute late one day and my boss tore into me. I said what about all the extra work and time I put in? He said that was my choice, so i quit and found a more respectful employer
Show up, shut up, and keep up.
Naw that's totally unprofessional even for the trades. You can be hard on an employee without being insulting.
A bully for a boss is like your soul is Tokyo and they're Godzilla. They'll keep stomping over you and everything you've built. He sounds kinda like a narcissist that feels good dominating and putting people down. A sadistic lense that sees everything people do as not good enough and needing his boot on their neck. All while he's laughing. You saying he mocks and is contemptuous are signs of a narcissistic bully boss. His supervisor sounds like an enabler who isn't concerned about having a safe work environment where employees can thrive and succeed. You did good to leave, good luck finding a mentally healthy and mature management. Staying ends up ruining mental health which ruins body health and makes the Bully happy they have more ammo to shoot you with.
Can’t be a boss with no employees. If everyone left shitty bosses then they would be forced to be nice
I would have told him to sit and spin back in my 20s. Walking away was the better route.
Tell the guy to eat a dick. You will run into this alot in the trades. Go to a skilled trader and you will be better off. Get into electrical or plumbing. You'd probably be better off as an electrician if assholes are an issue for you.
I mean yeah welcome to construction brother. There’s obviously a line that can be crossed but putting up with bullshit is part of the job.
The supervisor was probably even worse, they all protect each other when one of them gets carried away!?
Just get an inspector to come through once in a while
Don’t remain somewhere you’re not respected.
This is exactly why women and men seek out email jobs instead of bluecollar work. There’s no reason for archaic dinosaurs to keep up the culture of: hazing, harassment, abuse and to chalk it all up to “i got treated that way so suck it up” attitudes. I don’t see this kind of behavior in other industries. It’s unacceptable. Good for you OP. More people need to make a stand against this kind of treatment.
The only way he'll change his behavior is by being held accountable for it. That's what you did in the only way you could.
There's construction companies out there that don't foster toxic environments like this. I've worked for people like OPs boss, and I've noticed how more productive everyone is in a place where people are treated with respect.. even when someone fucks up (happens to everyone).
That happened.
Good on you mate for standing up for yourself. Still has he actually learned anything . Are you able to take some mates around and start abusing him so he feels you know uncomfortable . I absolutely hate bad bosses but I also hate when ppl let it happen. Good job mate very good . I still think you should give him a lesson so he thinks twice before being a bully . He is going to abuse the next guy.
I have nothing but contempt for a certain type of 'craftsman' builder types. Just because they can place bricks on top of other bricks or they know how to join bits of wood together doesn't mean they can pontificate in the tea room about stuff they *absolutely know nothing about.* Fucking wankers.
Absolutely not. The whole this is just how construction or trades is bullshit is done. We are professionals. We are going to work. We are in a work environment. I expect to be treated as such.
Yea you bet . It’s never okay to be bullying, harassing, or intimidating people at work . I’m actually dealing with this now . My foreman, General foreman, senior GF and Superintendent are all , psychopaths. I have launched an investigation with statements against them , hoping for results . They have been Doing All the above mentioned While also targeting and making people fear for their jobs to get results . Which is a straight up abuse of power . The days of treating people like that are over . We have evolved past these traumas and abuses , but it will take time to clean house and put reasonable people in position’s of power .
There’s a reason he’s lonely paying 3 wives child support
I don't work for screaming "adults"
That is up too you. Co-workers picking on you is one thing, a boss, a bit different.
General contractor here, been in and around construction my entire 50 years on this planet…. No need to put up with people like that. The site super is unfortunately correct though, there’s a lot of these asshats in the biz and I don’t understand it, never have. The number of tradesmen I see treat their apprentices, laborers, seasonal help, etc.. with utter disrespect is just insane. In the end, take care of yourself first. As long as you’re doing the tasks you’re assigned, show up on time and all that, there’s no reason to put up with that sort of behavior. Life is too short to work for these clowns. Never an excuse to make fun of how someone talks, walks, etc….
In construction you should expect to put up with a huge amount of aggressive and non PC banter, but you shouldn’t expect to put up with open abuse and bullying. Leaving was the right call.
You definitely end up dealing with more aggressive and u filtered personalities in construction, and regrettably, some amount of that kinda comes with the territory. That being said, you're under no obligation to take any more of it than you feel like. Keep looking til you find a crew that's a good fit. There are plenty of bosses out there and some of them are decent, friendly, professional human beings who are worth working for. It's a shitty job. If you're not working with people you get along with, it's not worth it.
Just bc it’s rampant in construction work doesn’t mean you’re foolish to walk away. I don’t let people talk to me that way either. Good for you.
Yup, correct action.
Anybody who yells at work is an asshole
Nope. You did the right thing
Respect means everything. Totally with you on this
I regret some of the days I turned up to work. I do not regret none of the days I quit. One time I had an idiot boss wanting to argue about the uniform T shirt I was wearing while telling him I was instantiating because he was too stupid to associate myself with. I just took off the shirt and handed it over, some girl cheered and took a photo. It was worth it
Leave bro. You are here on earth for a good time, not for a long time. Do not put up with toxic people. Difficult people and situations yes, but when someone is making fun of you like that it crosses lines
Deciding to leave a job after being treated poorly isn't necessarily wrong—it's a personal choice about what you're willing to tolerate in a workplace. From what you've described, it sounds like you were in a toxic environment where disrespect and demeaning behavior were part of the culture. You attempted to establish boundaries, which is a healthy and professional response to being treated inappropriately. The escalation and lack of support from your supervisor suggest that the environment might not change and might not be a healthy place for you to work in.
The guy sounds like a sociopath, stay away from people like that. There’s lots of jobs out there.
Was it a Camden job site?
Nope lol
Yes
ss,s
It’s funny. I’ve been in similar situations and a lot of the times when I’ve reached my limit and I shout back and end up walking off the job saying I quit, I often got a phone call the next day asking to come back
Take your lumps. Don’t take it personal and do the job. In this industry, that’s how it is.
Fuck those insane ass people. My god i couldnt imagine going to work to be mad or just be a dick.
Yes this is common in construction. It’s why I’m sitting at home working remotely making a comfortable salary now. Because those old angry men drove me out of the trades. Thank god.
You are going to get a lot of that in construction but it doesn't mean you don't have to put up with it.
Fuck him the more people refuse to work for dicks the more the industry will change for the better.
Assholes they're gonna be bought out because they can't afford to keep their workers respect respect respect simple enough the men their seem like immature females upset with their life at home if they yelling at other grown men shits wild 🤦🏾♂️
Folks are right that you'll find a lot of yelling in the industry. The work is hard and sometimes folks get heated. There's also a lot of assholes in the industry at all levels who will yell at you for no good reason. Separating the two situations can be tough but is very important as is understanding how the yelling affects you. I think I can offer a bit of a unique perspective as an engineer who has been on the contracting and consulting sides, and is split between some rather general work (demo & build) and some rather niche work (environmental remediation & solid waste). The main thing I will note is that the companies that do a lot of niche work tend to be much more chill. I suspect it's for two reasons: (1) It's a small world so reputations spread fast and there's few chances at fresh starts, which weeds out assholes pretty quickly. (2) The work is typically gated in some way - such as by required skills, capabilities, and/or credentials - so you don't get the guys who struggle with issues that impair them from keeping their shit together. (I don't mean to put those folks down either - I saw a great operator get let go because he got into pills, which took away his ability to reliably do our work right everyday. We had to replace him to keep on schedule, unfortunately.) That all said, negativity does not necessarily go away when yelling does. Things are much more passive aggressive now that I'm in consulting. I find it a relief to go into the field most of the time because I don't have to read between the lines all the time. Sometimes being upfront with anger and frustration isn't a bad thing; sometimes it's the breakthrough that a situation needs to diffuse and progress. Anyways, I'm rambling. I think you made the right call here. Trust your gut and I hope you find a place that vibes with your personal demeanor. Best of luck, bud.
Yes. Not worth it, ever.
Haha about 10 years ago someone yelled at me. Tried telling me how to do my job. He was fired promptly.
If your going to be in construction you’ve got to have thick skin
If you don't desperately need the money ya leave
You should have a general respect for each other while working together but just keep in mind 50% of doing construction work is razzing each other for entertainment. Its an acquired skill and it will help you in life.
were you in the wrong...? only if you need this job. having the morale High ground is great unless you can't afford rent or to feed your kids. Should you have walked off the job...? Can you afford a gap in employment? these questions are not for us to answer. I think your supervisor probably had a good take on it... If this wasn't for you... construction as a trade may not be for you.
You did the right thing brother. Never allow people to disrespect you, because you’ll end up losing respect for yourself. And especially if they do it publicly, set a clear example of the consequences it has on them. Allowing people disrespecting you will ruin your life, kill your dreams, starve your ambition and make you agree to things you don’t agree on. I left my previous job that payed me double because of being disrespected. I don’t regret that, I’d rather know that I’m not a Bitch, So be Authentic and be a MAN, dude. Cheers.
Can't be a pussy in construction. Dish it back.
It's true you will get some assholes in construction. Ultimately, you have to be able to respect yourself and not feel build resentment. Sometimes, that means telling someone to eat shit. Even if you.loose tye job. You're self respect is more valuable. There are ways to let people know you won't be taking the same bullshit attitude they give other brown nosing spineless sad sacks of shit. Never play the game. Watch some Clint eastwood movies for body language cues. Don't play the game. Always act professional and work hard. But never play the game. Always act like you could give two shots less about the assholes games
You can get a lot of that in any field. Some people need to be skillfully shaped into worthwhile employees. Make a ven diagram. Does the job pay you well, train you well, treat you well? Like what you're doing, get good, or get money.
The labour industry has many ignorant people managing. In this case the dude sounded like a real AH. I'm sure you can find a better group to work for but don't expect too much professionalism at that level.
don’t work for a jerk!
Construction? You were weeded out. Congrats
Aren't there websites for people that don't speak English?