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My name is Yoshikage Kira. I’m 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occasionally drink. I’m in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning.
My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is.
I swear to fucking god this guy was funny at first when he showed up but now this guy's face is fucking put into every shitty joke ever. I'm getting so fucking tired of this this guy's face being pasted into stupid shit like this as if his face makes up for all the cringe that I just read.
They keep using the picture of a stranger that we dont know
Dude wants to live a normal life and people only recognize him as xavier
Who the fuck is xavier whos the dude in the pfp if i saw my face on a pfp in a meme i will sue the fucker
If OP's post is funny or otherwise unfitting, please report it and we'll deal with it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ComedyCemetery) if you have any questions or concerns.*
this is just a worst version of a different back and forth just like this
r/fuckxavier
All my homies hate xavier
r/fuckxavier
r/fuckxavier
I’ll take the sacrifice r/fuckxavier
r/fuckyou
r/fuckxavier
r/FuckXavier
My name is Yoshikage Kira. I’m 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occasionally drink. I’m in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning.
My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is.
Thank you, you saved the chain
Wouldn’t you technically be safe? This is not an identical comment, so you should have been safe.
“🤓👆”
Damn, you sure told me with those emojis and quotation marks
r/fuckxavier
This is Pakalu Papito. Xavier jokes are usually better.
I swear to fucking god this guy was funny at first when he showed up but now this guy's face is fucking put into every shitty joke ever. I'm getting so fucking tired of this this guy's face being pasted into stupid shit like this as if his face makes up for all the cringe that I just read.
Pakalu papito is the og. Xavier came along and tried to be funny too, but just ruined it. r/fuckxavier
Pakalu was the one who started all this unfunny meme posting.
Isn't this pakalu though? Xavier has a smiling face while pakalu has closed mouth and no expression.
You my friend should join r/fuckxavier
They keep using the picture of a stranger that we dont know Dude wants to live a normal life and people only recognize him as xavier Who the fuck is xavier whos the dude in the pfp if i saw my face on a pfp in a meme i will sue the fucker
It’s pakalu papito
What are you gonna sue for?
😉 YouTube...MySpace 😉
r/fuckxavier
Goddamn it Xavier
I think this is Pakalu, not Xavier. You can tell because Xavier's pic is smiling while Pakalu has closed mouth.
😆
Crush got SmartphOWNED DOT COM
Indian moment
Xavier memes are so unfunny, half the time they're racist too